Alcohol

Say Yes to Ice Cream-Flavored Beer

The only thing controversial about Ben & Jerry's and New Belgium's venture is that there's any controversy at all.

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New Belgium

Last week, ice cream maker Ben & Jerry's and Colorado brewer New Belgium announced they would collaborate to create a new Salted Caramel Brownie Brown Ale, billed as "an ice cream infused craft beer."

This isn't the first beer pairing for Ben & Jerry's. Last spring, for example, the company kicked off a new product launch on the West Coast with a series of "frothy beer floats."

A press release announcing the partnership noted the beer will focus on the companies' shared efforts of "supporting sustainable agriculture" and "focus[ing] on environment awareness."

Wonderful. Or maybe not. Neo-Prohibitionists have jumped on the ice cream maker, warning of the potential harms of pairing a food kids like with a drink adults like.

"It's a crass, corporate greedy move to put a brand name like Ben & Jerry's on a beer," said Bruce Lee Livingston, executive director of the group Alcohol Justice, in remarks reported by USA Today. "It's bad for children—who will start looking at beer as the next step after ice cream."

I'd be surprised if ice cream-flavored beer appealed to anyone, let alone children, who are prohibited by law from buying the product. (Maybe it's my personal bias against anything boasting a salted caramel flavor.) But let's suppose Livingston is right, and the pairing is a gateway drug. If we assume that, why stop there? Let's take this sort of reasoning to its logical conclusions—and look at Ben & Jerry's ice cream itself.

Ben & Jerry's flavors like Hazed and Confused, an homage to 1993's weed-filled hit movie Dazed and Confused, clearly promote children's drug use. Cherry Garcia and Half Baked do the same.

Coffee Caramel Buzz and Coffee, Coffee BuzzBuzzBuzz! clearly promote childhood caffeine addiction.

Chocolate Therapy obviously promotes self-medicating for youngsters. Karamel Sutra, an ode to the Kama Sutra, the ancient Hindu text detailing various lovemaking positions, clearly promotes underage sex.

And with its White Russian flavor, an ode to the vodka-based cocktail of the same name, Ben & Jerry's has been promoting hard liquor use by children—obviously—since it was introduced in 2013.

Clearly. Obviously. Okay, maybe not really. Or at all.

Alcohol Justice, which attempts to "hold Big Alcohol accountable for the harm its products cause," urges a series of policies that target the rights of adult drinkers. For example, the group supports lowering the permissible blood alcohol content of drivers from .08 to .05. It wants to ban flavored beers, including Mike's Hard Lemonade, because they target "youth (especially girls)." It seeks to raise federal excise taxes on alcohol. And it wants to ban Palcohol, a powdered-alcohol product I wrote about here recently.

While Alcohol Justice claims to target "Big Alcohol," craft brewers like New Belgium, smaller competitors like Mike's Hard Lemonade, and tiny startup Palcohol hardly fit that description, not that anybody should feel differently about Alcohol Justice's arguments if they were simply opposed to alcohol being sold by bigger companies.

But even the littlest sellers appear to be targets of the group's ire. For example, Alcohol Justice recently fought a bill in California that would open up farmers' markets in the state to the scourge of wine tastings. Again, it's because of the children.

"Kids, you go on a pony ride while I taste the chardonnay, is what you might hear a parent say at your local certified farmers' market if AB 2488 becomes law," Livingston remarked in opposing the bill.

Among the warnings Alcohol Justice posted about the bill, which became law last year, are that "daytime tastings, with little to no monitoring, in family-friendly settings, are inappropriate and threaten public health and safety" and that "children watching parents drinking alcohol when they shop for fruit or vegetables is a practice very damaging to impressionable young minds."

It's all about the children, right?

Indeed it is. Livingston had previously referred to burger chain Red Robin's "mango Muscato wine shake" as "alcohol on training wheels."

Alcohol Justice isn't opposed to "Big Alcohol." It's opposed to alcohol, full stop. No one, including me, opposes efforts to keep alcohol out of the hands of children. But there's no justice in treating adult consumers of alcohol like children.

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229 responses to “Say Yes to Ice Cream-Flavored Beer

  1. I hate finding myself in the position of defending a company like Ben and Jerrys. Oh well, principles over principals.

    Why in the fuck is it the government’s business? Aren’t the majority of your sweet “chick drinks” basically something that children would drink, given the opportunity? The Sam Adams Cream Stout that I enjoy is practically chocolate beer, I guess that should be outlawed as well.

    Fuck off prohibitionist slavers.

    1. Well, remember Four Loko. People already are doing what you say with alcopop/”chick drinks”.
      It is completely stupid, but nothing new. To me it looks like neo-prohibitionists pushing for any restrictions on alcohol they can get away with. “For the children” is just a convenient tool.

    2. Ben and Jerrys is owned by Unilever.

      1. Sellouts.

        1. Hi! Playa! How are you? Looking great.

          /charitable enough?

          1. Go on…

            1. Part of being Christian is to be forgiving.

              1. Christians also suck balls, R.U.J.U.S.

        2. Playa

          It happened some time ago. I believe both Ben and Jerry stayed on the Board and one may still be on it. There were a lot of other “socially aware” requirements in the contract. I recall that the sale netted Ben and Jerry a combined $50.5M.

          1. I’d love to see the sale agreement. I wonder if all of their cream still comes from happy cows in Vermont?

            1. I think at least some of it does. Was in Vermont last weekend. Absolutely love their constitutional carry – applies to residents and non-residents equally.

              1. Part of their whole corporate strategy was that they only purchased cream from Vermont based, family owned dairies. And I believe that they claimed (or did at one point) that they paid above the market price for said cream, and that’s why their ice cream was more than double the price of other brands.

                I’d be surprised if Unilever still did this.

                1. I watched a short video about it and recall the Unilever attorney stating that this was the most memorable contract he worked on because of all of the stipulations as well as how friendly Ben and Jerry were (one or both had him to their house to have supper with them).

          2. I’m sure they honored their commitment not to make more than 5 times that of their lowest paid employee when they received their $50 mil. Not.

            1. that = than that

              1. CTE

                Was my thought and was the impetus for me originally researching this. It was difficult to find information since it was a private company but I think there were more shares than just those owned by Ben and Jerry, suggesting an ESOP. But there’s no way each employee got at least $4.1M (one of the got $41M).

                1. $8.2M (one fifth of $41M).

                  1. Chum is something we put on hooks to get pussy, brightboobs./

      2. Watch out, then, when they start to cut their ice cream w melloream.

    3. Aren’t the majority of your sweet “chick drinks” basically something that children would drink, given the opportunity?

      “Hey barkeep, I’ll have a fuzzy navel, and she’ll have the girliest drink in the house.”

      1. “Two fuzzy navels, coming right up. Ma’am.”

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    5. I make up to $90 an hour working from my home. My story is that I quit working at Walmart to work online and with a little effort I easily bring in around $40h to $86h? Someone was good to me by sharing this link with me, so now i am hoping i could help someone else out there by sharing this link… Try it, you won’t regret it!……
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  2. Shitty brewer and shitty creamery.

    Why do you make me cheer for these assholes, Linnekin? Couldn’t you find a product being cross-developed by Shiner and H?agen-Dazs.

    1. Shitty ice cream yes, but have you tried Fat Tire? Good stuff.

      1. Hops. Hops. Hops.

        That’s their answer to everything. You’d think the Easter Bunny was their managing partner.

        1. Being raised on Leinenkugel’s may have ruined by beer taste for good.

          1. See, I think Leinenkugel’s has a pretty good selection. Sure they’re lightish beers but their answer to everything isn’t “double the hops!”

            1. We called it squaw piss. (Should send Warren a free case). In the late mid 80’s it was pretty bad stuff, but cheap. A buck for a bottle at a bar. I saw one here in Tokyo at the liquor store and bought just for fun. 4$.

          2. Leineys original was pretty bad, but since the family was bought out, they make some pretty good beers.

            That statement should in no way be construed, though, as supporting Summer Shandy.

        2. I think Fat Tire is the most overrated Colorado Brewer. I had Odell’s Tree Shaker IPA a week or so ago. I don’t generally like IPAs but it was good.

          1. (I should’ve said most overrated beer, since New Belgium is the brewer)

        3. Some of us do actually like lots of hops. Though I have to agree that it does get a bit carried away sometimes. Just don’t try to tell me that IPAs are some kind of hipster conspiracy or something.

          1. If it’s not a double IPA, I’m not interested. I like things very bitter.

            The extra booze doesn’t hurt either. Drinking 1 IPA is better for you than drinking 4 light beers.

          2. I, for one, love beers brewed with massive quantities of high-quality hops. I think my favorite brew is about 80 IBU.

            Fat Tire is a punk 22. Budweiser is a bit less than 10.

            1. I exaggerated: my favorite’s IBU is just 65.

              1. Exaggeration is like a terrified face-plant in a garden plot called Cato the Elder. I actually name three tomatoe plant Cato the Elder. Just delivering….

        4. ???

          NB makes a ton of non-hoppy beers. Have you confused them with Stone?

          1. Mmmmm. Stone.
            I tried to go to their brewery last time I was down south.
            I ended up at Karl Strauss instead.

            1. Ugh, Karl Strauss? Their beers perpetually disappoint me.

        5. If you think 1554 is full of hops you must have been raised on watery light “beer”.

      2. Fat Tire is decent although I agree with sloppy that the hops craze has gotten out of hand. I’ve been enjoying Devil’s Backbone Vienna Lager lately.

        1. Who you calling sloppy, you admittedly unkempt bastard?

          1. I tend to speed-read sometimes, and I used to think your handle was “Sloppy Inca”.

            1. I thought it was Sloopy Inca.

          2. You’re being sloppy right now.

        2. I agree about the hops. IPAs are fine but come summer it seems like thats your ony choice on tap other than domestics at a lot of bars.

          1. Hops should be like neck knives for us men and when we seek those bottles of neck knives we should cray and shrak… and try to lave…

        3. Cisco from Nantucket makes some really nice lagers

    2. Does Shiner make a good beer? I’m not a fan of Fat Tire, but New Belgium makes some fine beers.

  3. Ben and Jerry are getting hosed by the nanny types they support,and yes,I have to defend . them.BTY,one of my favs is Sam Adams chocolate stout.Not to be confused with candy.Sam Smith oatmeal stout is another,but ,kids don’t like oatmeal,lol.

    1. btw,in the summer,Mike’s hard,with a slice of lime a jigger of gin is quite good.

      1. You are a monster.

        1. coming from you,that’s a compliment.

        2. Something about a kettle and a pot…

          1. A kettle of Mike’s and a pot of gin? Don’t forget the bag of limes!

            1. Are fixing drinks or trying to summon Steve Smith?

              1. that would take an eye of newt and two orphans I think

      2. Do you drink at TGIFridays or something?

    2. The Poet by New Holland is an excellent Oatmeal Stoat as is Samual Smith’s.

      1. Samual Smith makes a really good Nut Brown as well

        1. Yes.yes they do.

  4. Alcohol Justice

    Enact your own drinking, shitlord.

    1. I enacted my own drinking last night just before that storm ripped through. Today I get to see what it takes to re-erect a fence.

      1. A post hole digger, 4x4s, and concrete. I can’t stand when fenceposts are set directly into the soil to rot.

        1. Oh the piers were two feet deep. The wind pulled them out of the ground. I don’t know if the soil will hold it up or if I’m gonna have to replace the 4x4s and put new piers in with a bigger hole. Really, what’s needed long term is bracing on the back side of the fence since its downhill and downwind. But that’s a common area so I don’t know what the shit to do here.

          1. New holes and a sack of concrete per hole. Or just reset them in the existing holes and roll the dice that you’ll be gone before the next storm like that. Or just hire some fucking Mexicans and be done with it.

            1. I’m gonna go ahead and take door #3. Id rather get a colonoscopy than dig a dozen new postholes.

              1. Are you in Austin or SA? If you’re down south, I can send over a squad of goons to dig those holes for you. Yes, I have goons. We can’t rely on police to enforce our contracts, so…brute squad.

                1. I’m still in Fort Worth. But I-35 isn’t that long a road.

            2. http://bit.ly/1b0KXzl

              When will the SJW’s move to ban this?

              1. I thought those were an essential part of Mexican culture.

            3. regular Mexicans work almost as well

    2. By the way, check out their site. They’ve got leftist-prohibitionists written all over themselves.

      They’re worse than Illinois Nazis.

      1. I tried to find a bio on their CEO to no avail. I figured he would be a reformed alcoholic, they’re always the most aggressive paternalists.

        1. His Twitter page. https://mobile.twitter.com/brucelivingston

          Looks like he’s a big Union guy and is not a fan of God.

          1. I wonder if God is a fan if *him*?

          2. “Organizer, Alcohol Justice director, student of complex adaptive systems, dancer, tennis player, proud dad.”

            Lame

            1. Except for the tennis player part. Assuming he doesn’t play like Milos.

              1. I would sleep with his wife.

  5. Does this make me evil for still giving out candy cirgattes on Halloween?

    1. You sir,are worse than Hitler!

      1. You know who else was worse than Hitler?

    2. Did you also give out toy gun pez dispensers? Cause if you did you are my new hero.

    3. I like to teach the neighborhood kids responsibility, so I hand out condoms.

      ::smells own fart::

  6. Neo-Prohibitionists have jumped on the ice cream maker, warning of the potential harms of pairing a food kids like with a drink adults like.

    You’re not fooling me. That’s from The Onion.

  7. I hope Ben & Jerry’s have connected the dots and realize they’re on the wrong side of the ideological divide.

    ‘Hey, but we’re Ben & Jerry’s! We’re progs! Just like you! No nukes! We wear sandals! We use local milk! We have small carbon footprints! Tax the rich!’ just ain’t gonna cut it with the parasitical, cannibalistic Jacobin reactionary regressive class.

    C’man.

    1. They strayed off the ranch and must be punished.

      1. Their purity test is even worse than the libertarian purity test:) Almost as bad as the Spanish Inquisition.

        1. I’ve heard that less than 8% of self-labelled progressives pass the test.

    2. To be fair, being anti-alcohol isn’t really a universal prog characteristic these days. Hell, the ones who want to emulate EUrope in every way probably think our drinking age laws are stupid. ANd love craft beer and B&Js;.

      1. ANd love craft beer and B&Js;.

        You left out Mexican ass sex and deep dish.

        1. Well, that goes without saying.

        2. They don’t love German ass sex and accuse those engaging in it of rape.

      2. But it may be only like the way the late Harry [Forgot Last Name] characterized them: “We can have legal recreational drugs, but only after we have total socialism, so the people can handle it.”

  8. “No one, including me, opposes efforts to keep alcohol out of the hands of children.”

    Actually, I oppose that. I’m sick to the teeth of the whole nonsense about “teenage drinking” and punishing parents who serve their kids alcohol. So, we keep the little darlings totally sober until we send them off to college, and then we have the nerve to be surprised that they don’t handle it well.

    I don’t think there is a way to introduce people to alcohol that insures that none of them will be drunks or fools. Given that, I think it’s time we admitted that allowing the buttinski do-gooders to but into people’s lives on the subject does more harm than good.

    Some people are going to be drunks. Some people are going to be druggies. Some imbeciles are going to drive when they shouldn’t. And there are going to be deaths. There are ALWAYS going to be deaths. Everybody who has ever lived has died or will die.

    Deal. With. It.

    Alcohol Justice isn’t about opposing “Big Alcohol”. It isn’t even about opposing alcohol generally. It’s about feeling smugly superior to the Common Folk, and pushing them around, and the people who are behind the name need to be whipped through the streets.

    1. I’ve been giving my daughter wine since she was four or five. Mind you, not a glass but sips here and there. I dip a nice piece of ciabatta in the wine and give it to her. Sometimes I mix in some 7Up in it. She’s also had some cappuccino – again, I stack it with more milk than anything with just a dash of espresso for ‘color’ but she’s getting her exposure. I’m surprised the busy-body dead-beat pain in the ass nannies haven’t gone after cold cuts – because salt, nitrates!

      I’d be punished by there’s Puritan Calvinist ignoramuses. But luckily Quebec is pretty lax when it comes to alcohol. I do that shit in restaurants too.

      1. Some states do allow parents to give their kids alcohol, even at restaurants. But I think they are a minority.

        I don’t know how it is in Canada now (and I guess each province has its own rules), but it seemed pretty lax when I visited Montreal as a teenager. What’s the drinking age there? The US seems to, out of all the countries with any kind of drinking culture, most vigorously enforce a drinking age. Any other country I have visited that has a drinking age doesn’t seem to do much to enforce it. And certainly wouldn’t punish parents for giving their kids a beer or something.

        1. The drinking age is 18 – but it’s a suggestion. They do ‘enforce’ it sorta but for the most part in restaurants it’s pretty lax.

          Montreal is the Europe of North America when it comes to this sort of thing.

          Quebec is different than any other place. Ontario is more in line with U.S. states. Massachusetts for example are pretty tight ass. We laugh every time we visit at how Puritan they are with the alcohol laws.

          1. “We laugh every time we visit at how Puritan they are with the alcohol laws.”

            *cough*Utah*cough*

            1. Okay, okay. Not that Puritan…

          2. I got wrecked at Whistler as a teenager (with sexy results!). Canada is like the Mexico of winter break.

            For some reason, I thought the drinking age there was 19.

        2. Only a small minority of states make the consumption of alcohol by minors illegal. Actually I’m not sure any of them do that, although a few outlaw possession, but it’s possible for use of an item to occur w/o legal possession of it.

      2. To be fair, it would be cruel to expect people to live in Quebec and be sober.

        1. On the other hand, they did choose to do so, so you have to wonder if they are all that sensitive.

      3. Let’s be fair to the Puritans: “They were not, however, opposed to drinking alcohol in moderation. Early New England laws banning the sale of alcohol to Native Americans were criticised because it was “not fit to deprive Indians of any lawfull comfort aloweth to all men by the use of wine.” Laws banned the practice of individuals toasting each other, with the explanation that it led to wasting God’s gift of beer and wine, as well as being carnal….Puritans publicly punished drunkenness and sexual relations outside marriage.”

        http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Puritan

        1. It was a lot harder to be a t-totaler when beer and wine were the consistently safe beverages. Any idea when Christian t-totaling first appears? It always seems a bit odd given all the wine in the Bible.

          I love the people who will tell you that the wine in the Bible was really grape juice. Without refrigeration or sterilization grape juice is wine.

          1. In line with your remarks, I believe that the Prohibition movement got started as clean, non-alcoholic beverages became available – around the early 19th century.

            There were movements among Protestants and Catholics to *voluntarily* pledge abstinence. There were social clubs for young men to gather in a non-alcoholic way. This was all without govt coercion.

            Then certain Protestants, more Puritan than the Puritans, decided that the government should stamp out drunkenness by banning alcohol altogether. Before the Civil War, Prohibition was a key Protestant evangelical cause (“Rum, Romanism and slavery” described their targets). The Civil War kind of put the kibosh on Prohibition for several decades, but it started creeping back in, and WWI gave them the chance to try their experiment on the whole country.

            1. Protestants. The boring twin of Catholics. Always Protesting something.

              /grin.

            2. There were social clubs for young men to gather in a non-alcoholic way.

              NTTAWWT.

        2. Punishing drunkenness does seem to be one puritan holdover in our laws. If most state liquor laws are followed to the letter, pretty much any drunkenness outside of your home can get you arrested. And no one would ever get drunk in a bar.

      4. Yeah, right, don’t introduce them to cold cuts now because then they’ll want them when they have heart failure & need to restrict sodium intake. Don’t correct their nearsightedness now because they’ll need reading glasses later.

      5. Allowing kids to drink while under their parent’s supervision is common sense and would help more than anything to combat irresponsible drinking. How? Two ways:
        1) Parents would be able to teach their kids how to drink responsibly. No, you don’t chug that glass of wine like it was the first water you’ve tasted after a week in the desert. Yes, there is a difference between crappy Bud Lite and real beer. No, being able to handle a glass of beer doesn’t mean you can handle the same volume of whiskey. Etc.
        2) Kids would associate alcohol with being with their parents.

    2. ^THIS. You said it better than I could have. In the grand scheme of things, who gives a shit if a kid has some beer?

      1. Well, these people, clearly. They get all worked up about it, and foam at the mouth. But what baffles me is that society listens to them instead of having them tranquilized.

    3. I think the best way to deal with alcohol and other mind altering substances (within reason) is to reach: a) moderation and b) that these things aren’t scary.

      If my kid wants to taste my beer or wine at 5, so be it. He’ll probably hate it which won’t be a bad thing.

      1. That’s why, I believe, rates of drunkenness in the Mediterranean is so low. Kids get exposed to it at a young age and by the time they can actually enjoy it because of age or whatever, they don’t go nuts on it because they’re already familiar with it. It’s all so common sense.

        Here the other uses France to compare it to Britain as an example but it’s the same in places like Italy and Spain. In fact, rates of youth drunkenness is lower in Italy as are alcohol related deaths:

        http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/n…..g-culture/

    4. Actually, I oppose that…

      Amen!

      Went fishing yesterday. Place by, an otherwise pristine stream, where the kids go to drink was littered with several hundred beer bottles/cans. So…

      1. They were obviously able to obtain alcohol despite the law.
      2. They needed to go someplace discrete to drink so they got drunk and drove home, BECAUSE of the law.
      3. They left their trash in place so as not to get busted disposing of it, BECAUSE of the law.

      Great law.

    5. If the nanny-state fascists were really serious about reducing fatal car crashes, the most effective thing they could do is ban people under 20 and over 70 years of age from driving. Under 20 and over 70 drivers have an incidence rate of fatal crashes that is twice that of 25-39 year olds and 65-69 year olds. The curves for fatal crashes, injury crashes, and non-injury crashes are all bathtub-shaped.

      This would be infinitely more effective than lowering the DWI blood-alcohol content below 0.08.

      I’m sure these nanny-state fascists wouldn’t mind screwing over the kids, but they are old enough to know that they’re going to be geezers someday. Traffic fatality rates are not the issue; they are just a talking point.

      1. oops, instead of 25-39 y.o., that should read 20-25 year old.

        Teenagers and geezers have triple the fatalities rate of drivers between 25 and 69.

    6. my old man never got to drink all his beer, my sisters and I would line up with our Welches jelly glass’s and we’d each get a couple of fingers from his quart of MHL when he got home from work in the summer…beer, wine and whiskey never were much of a mystery and so never a problem…start em young and take the teeth out of the serpent

  9. When I was a kid we once had vanilla ice cream milkshakes with Black Label beer at my Great Uncles farm in Wisconsin. So decades later I get ahold of some Black Label to recreate. Some memories are best left intact:)

    1. Hey Maybell!

  10. I’m a big fan of Brown Ales. They typically pair very nicely with hot wings. I also like Ben & Jerrys ice cream especially Americone Dream and New Belgium beers and who doesn’t like salted caramel and brownies so I can’t wait to try this..

    1. New Belguim’s Fat Tire has been pretty available on tap around town for a while.

    2. Any fans of Kronenbourg 1664 here?

      1. Yes.

      2. of course,and a side of scotch.

      3. Wooo! Legion beer!

  11. Breaking Rand Paul news (trigger warning: Salon)

    Rand Paul’s been hanging out with Dan Bilzerian

    Rand Paul is coming under on Friday after broadcasting a Snapchat video of himself that included the “King of Instagram,” Dan Bilzerian, playing what appears to be Liar’s Poker with $100 bills, the Daily Caller’s Kaitlan Collins reports.

    Bilzerian, a trust-fund beneficiary who plays professional poker for a living, came to national attention last year after a porn star he literally threw off a roof during a Hustler photo shoot turned around and threatened to sue him.

    In the 11-second video, which included the caption “Lessons from Dan Bilzerian,” the Republican candidate is seen holding a “hand” that consists of $100 bills; he and Bilzerian are rattling off their serial numbers. Paul may be attempting to curry favor with young voters by reaching out via Snapchat ? much like President Barack Obama did when he met with YouTube celebrities in January.

    However, Paul’s decision to associate with this particular internet celebrity seems to demonstrate a severe lapse in judgment, as Bilzerian’s seal of approval is unlikely to sit well with the socially conservative segment of the Republican base.

    They’re so concerned about Rando’s appeal amongst the SoCons.

    1. Supposedly Dan’s Dirty Celeb name is Fake Equis

    2. Hey, it was the SoCons who persuaded him to throw the porn star off the roof – it’s part of our Throw Loose Women Off Roofs campaign.

      /sarc

      1. I’m confused. You mean there’s another way to dispose of loose women?

    3. Obama’s campaign got into bed with Lena Fucking Dunham.

      *drops mic into pitcher of beer*

  12. Hmmm… There goes my idea for similac vodka sold in baby bottles.

  13. This is kinda funny given how many shots are named after candy and childrens cereal particularly the Rumchata ones for the latter.

    1. +1 lemon drop.

    2. or the birthday cake shot

      1. Is that a thing?

        1. Have you had Cake Vodka? It taste.. like you guessed it.. cake.

          1. I mostly drink beer and John (Jack’s friends call him John).

            1. Yeah, I pretty much stick with beer now days

              1. Weddings excepted. I have a reputation to uphold.

        2. Citron vodka, Frangelico, and lemon go into the birthday cake shot. It actually tastes like cake, I had it once when I used to bartend. (bought for me) It’s ordered by the kind of people you’d expect.

  14. “It’s a crass, corporate greedy move”

    I see – he objects to corporations being all corporation-y.

    So, the answer is to sell this stuff at state-run liquor stores. No icky corporateness!

  15. “Kids, you go on a pony ride while I taste the chardonnay, is what you might hear a parent say at your local certified farmers’ market if AB 2488 becomes law.”

    The *horror*.

    1. That’s supposed to be a bad thing?

    2. Next thing you know, it will be legal for parents at home to say, “get Mommy a beer out of the fridge so she can drink it while watching wrestling.”

      1. I mean, hypothetically.

        1. But that quote saddens me – what kind of misanthropic wretchedness could get someone to talk like that?

      2. I wonder if it was illegal for my dad to teach me how to make gin and tonics when I was 6.

    3. Seriously, I do not understand how someone like Livingston doesn’t get laughed out of the room when he uncorks ( pardon the pun ) a line like this.

      On the other hand, the bill passed despite his opposition, which is a little reassuring.

  16. Alcohol is the drink of Satan. It shouldn’t be banned in general, no matter you are a kid or a far grown adult. True Christian Law in The Bible prohibits alcohol in general. So-called Christians who drink anything that contains alcohol always get to Hell, no matter how they may profess Jesus as God. Proverbs 14:12, 20:1. The same way faux Christians who are indulged in adultery, fornication, faggotry, and in other sins.

    1. The Puritans were a tad more nuanced – see above.

      1. And remember how Christ changed water to grape juice at Cana?

        1. It is a terrible sin to speculate what this Christ’s miracle in Cana was. It doesn’t say about thing called wine whether it was fermented or it was a plain grape juice. We can judge by our common senses of knowledge. This wine made by Jesus was drank by those wedding hosts and guesses in excess. If this so-called wine was fermented, all these wedding celebrators would get drunk like Hell. Jesus is God, and God hates drunks likewise He hates adulterers, fags, and other sinners. Guess for your self. So Jesus supports sin ?

          1. There’s only room for one religious fanatic on H&R, and that’s ME.

            “He causes the grass to grow for the cattle, And vegetation for the labor of man, So that he may bring forth food from the earth, And wine which makes man’s heart glad…” Psalm 104:14-15

            1. “The Massachusetts Bay Company’s ship Arabella left port with 10,000 gallons of beer, 120 large casks of malt to jump start the brewing industry, and oddly enough, just 12 gallons of Dutch gin. Wine was not on the list because it was not a common table beverage in England, nor would it be in the colonies, the belief being that wine was only for the wealthy.

              “Planners of the colonial enterprise provided for resupplying the essential raw materials for brewing when they’d run out of what they’d carried from home. Dean Albertson writes in his oddly titled paper “Puritan Liquor in the Planting of New England” that “every member also brought one hogshead [large cask] each of wheat, rye, and barley seed.” In an observation suggestive of the level of beer consumption, he notes that “There was not sufficient barley mash produced, however, to slake the thirst of the entire colony, so they learned to derive a passable beer malt from oats, rye, old wheat, and even corn. Modern craft brewers will cringe at the last because it is scorned as a cheap adulterant resorted to only by industrial scale producers of the proverbial beer-like “wet air.””

              http://www.examiner.com/articl…..-alcohol-1

              1. It’s one thing to oppose drunkenness, and to encourage addicts to become teetotalers as a precaution against their addiction.

                It’s another thing to make alcohol *treyf,* as if a laborer getting some beer after a hard day’s work is like some guy lying in the gutter guzzling gin.

          2. Jesus is God, and God hates drunks likewise He hates adulterers, fags, and other sinners.

            Huh. Last I checked, you’re a sinner, too, pal. Just like all of the rest of us. You’ve got nothing to boast about.

          3. If God hates fags so much, he wouldn’t have given man fire and sticks.

        2. “And remember how Christ changed water to grape juice at Cana?”
          Some Christians actually believe this, my aunt being one of them. I love her but she’s crazy.

    2. I just learned a word today.

      ‘Fagatronics’.

      On a side note, Fundamentalist Protestant vs. Roman Catholic is to religious debate as the dog collar cage match is to professional wrestling.

      Personally, I’m rooting for Notorious.

      1. Let’s be fair – the Westboro folks represent their late founder, his family, and apparently some of his friends. They don’t represent Protestant evangelicals as a group.

        1. True.

          I grew up in a fundamentalist protestant church, so I have certain biases.

    3. The first public miracle performed by Christ was to turn water into wine. And drinkers at a Jewish wedding would have noticed if it was alcohol free.

    4. The Apostle Paul is far more of an authority on alcohol than Puritan man.

      Drink no longer water, but use a little wine for thy stomach’s sake and thine often infirmities.
      — I Timothy 5:23

      Good advice for saint and sinner.

  17. Please, take action! STOP Unregulated Booze at CA Beauty Parlors & Barber Shops

    ? Who will monitor the number of drinks served and the drink sizes? The Alcoholic Beverage Control agency has less than 150 agents for the state and they will not monitor or enforce at any location that does not have a license.

    ?This bill makes no mention of age requirements or proper Responsible Beverage Service training of persons pouring the alcohol. It throws out all standards of retail service of alcohol.

    ? The bill would allow every barbershop, beauty parlor, spa or nail salon venue to serve alcohol regardless of the presence of underage persons – toddlers, adolescents or underage youth who could easily be served or sneak drinks.

    1. Fuck off, slaver.

    2. block|4.25.15 @ 11:14AM|#
      “Please, take action!…”

      You’re lost. Salon and Huffpo are somewhere over to the left of here.

      1. Did you read all the bullet points? The number of drinks served will be uncounted. The sizes will also be unrestricted. On top of all that, the pourer does not have to undergo Responsible Beverage Service training. I don’t think you have thought this all the way through. Soon, some unscrupulous owner will, fueled by avarice, introduce exotic dancers along with the alchol to further entice male customers to get a haircut at his establishment. In addition, imagine the types of haircuts their soused patrons are going to request for their children.

        1. block|4.25.15 @ 12:07PM|#
          “Did you read all the bullet points?…”

          Awright, that’s good. Not an A, but….
          Well, yeah, an A.
          Who are you and what did you do with the slaver?

        2. This is mid-level performance art.

        3. block, if his comments are for real, is missing the second part to his name: Head.

        4. But how else do you get children to sit still enough for a good haircut?

  18. You want to know the Truth, listen to my friends in Westboro Baptist Church. This is one of the True Churches left in this doomed America. They tell you the truth that alcohol is a demon in the cup.

    1. Is this a parody account, or are you a Westboro Baptist supporter?

      If the latter, what do you think of them cursing their own country and portraying burning flags?

      1. At first I thought “serious account.” Now I’m thinking “serious troll.”

        1. Yeah, nicely played. Start off plausible, and gradually crank the derp to see when people catch on.

      2. I don’t want to lie, for lying is a sin against God. Yes, I confess, I am a supporter of Westboro Baptist Church. I am a friend to Brent, Shirley, Margie, Tim, and other people here.

        1. Then, as a friend, tell them they might want to tone it down.

          1. Though I’m sorry to hear of your founder’s passing.

            http://www.nydailynews.com/new…..-1.1731203

          2. Tone down, what ? I don’t understand your saying.

            1. I didn’t expect you would – but seriously, if God hates sinners, why did He go to all the trouble of being crucified for those same sinners?

              1. Christ died for God’s elects. Today we got too many so-called Christians who perverted John 3:16. No genuine repentance from sins, no forgiveness, Luke 13:5.

                1. By implication, genuine repentance from since means forgiveness. But you’re a Calvinist, aren’t you?

                  We have to believe in free will – we have no choice.

                  “What the Calvinist misses is clear throughout the Bible. Man is truly free and God calls him to freely choose to serve or not to serve the Lord.”

                  http://www.catholic.com/magazi…..or-freedom

        2. Then go fuck yourself, you mendacious cunt.

        3. I am a friend to Brent, Shirley, Margie, Tim, and other people here.

          Is that like being a friend of Dorothy?

          1. “Brent, I couldn’t believe when I started this ministry with only a handful of people that I could attract so much attention! But when I saw my $10,000 check I realized that I could profit from being a jerk.”

    2. But it’s delicious demon in the cup.

    3. This has got to be a troll

      1. by which I mean not authentic

  19. Holy shit. The new troll is going to be fun!

    1. Actually, I am not the troll. I tell the real things of life.

      1. Go on…

        TRIGGER WARNING:

        I’M CANADIAN.

  20. Yuengling, the greatest American beer in this here land, switched over producing ice cream during prohibition. They have recently restarted their ice cream business and it is quite good. They don’t have an ice cream flavoured beer yet, but they do have a “Black and Tan” ice cream that is reportedly quite good.

    1. I can probably name 2000 American breweries better than Yuengling.

      1. Budweiser, for instance.

        1. Yuengling is better than Bud. But it can’t match craft beers. And if I want a lager I usually buy somethibg brewed in Mexico (Tecate being my pick of the litter).

    2. Heh. Had Yuengling at the Phillies-Mets game last year.

  21. Alcohol Justice, which attempts to “hold Big Alcohol accountable for the harm its products cause,” urges a series of policies that target the rights of adult drinkers. For example, the group supports lowering the permissible blood alcohol content of drivers from .08 to .05. It wants to ban flavored beers, including Mike’s Hard Lemonade, because they target “youth (especially girls).” It seeks to raise federal excise taxes on alcohol. And it wants to ban Palcohol, a powdered-alcohol product I wrote about here recently.

    Does this constitute an initiation of force? I believe it does.

    1. Isn’t Belgium Brewing a craft brewer? It’s pretty ridiculous to call it Big Alcohol if that’s the case.

  22. Beer and ice cream are EXCELLENT together.

  23. Beer is for fools ! Beer turns people into fools !
    Billy Sunday.

    God hates drunkards as they are !
    Fred W. Phelps Sr

    1. Billy Sunday? What do you think of these parts of Billy Sunday’s ministry?

      “Sunday was not a separationist as were many Protestants of his era. He went out of his way to avoid criticizing the Roman Catholic Church and even met with Cardinal Gibbons during his 1916 Baltimore campaign. Also, cards filled out by “trail hitters” were faithfully returned to the church or denomination that the writers had indicated as their choice, including Catholic and Unitarian.

      “Although Sunday was ordained by the Presbyterian Church in 1903, his ministry was nondenominational and he was not a strict Calvinist. He preached that individuals were, at least in part, responsible for their own salvation. “Trail hitters” were given a four-page tract that stated, “if you have done your part (i.e. believe that Christ died in your place, and receive Him as your Saviour and Master) God has done HIS part and imparted to you His own nature.””

      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/B…..ious_views

      1. Quick…somebody throw these two some weapons.

        1. What for? I can fight this guy with one hand tied behind my back and a paper bag over my head.

      2. I just focused on Sunday’s views regarding alcohol, not his heresies in Jacob Arminius trash.

        1. Score one for me.

          1. What’s the matter, discount John Calvin? Can’t take any more?

            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zs_sdWaqpZw

            1. Ah, well, it was fun while it lasted, but I guess Mr. “puritan” has moved on.

  24. My best friend’s mother-in-law makes $85 /hour on the internet . She has been out of work for 5 months but last month her pay was $16453 just working on the internet for a few hours.
    Visit this website ?????????? http://www.jobsfish.com

  25. I never had ice cream-flavored beer, but I’ve had, & served, ale-flavored ice cream. I think it was billed as Guinness-flavored, but was basically just malty.

  26. Whiskey Rebellion

  27. “It’s bad for children?who will start looking at beer as the next step after ice cream.”

    OK, so what’s “the next step after ice cream” supposed to be? Chocolate sauce? Does it mean the very next thing someone ingests after starting ice cream? Or the next thing someone consumes or adds after becoming bored w ice cream, or plain ice cream?

    Or, looking at things the other way around, what’s the last step before beer supposed to be? Coffee? Pretzels?

  28. The only thing worse than banning ice cream flavored beer is producing such an abomination in the first place.

    1. What do you have against ice cream?

  29. Google pay 97$ per hour my last pay check was $8500 working 1o hours a week online. My younger brother friend has been averaging 12k for months now and he works about 22 hours a week. I cant believe how easy it was once I tried it out.
    This is wha- I do…… ?????? http://www.netjob80.com

  30. Took me, like, forever, to figure out their cartoon, even in the enlarged image from the story site. At 1st I thought it was a penguin, 2nd a caped skier from the back, then finally…I won’t spoil it.

  31. Kaylee . true that Stephen `s artlclee is super, last monday I got a brand new GMC from having made $7176 this – 4 weeks past and-in excess of, $10,000 last month . this is definitely the most rewarding Ive ever done . I actually started seven months/ago and practically straight away was earning minimum $82 per-hour . learn the facts here now .. http://www.Work4Hour.Com

  32. A good cappuccino stout float is mmm mmm delish.

  33. I think I’d be more worried about kids eating Ben & Jerry’s than in drinking beer, actually.

  34. pay 97$ per hour my last pay check was $8500 working 1o hours a week online. My younger brother friend has been averaging 12k for months now and he works about 22 hours a week. I cant believe how easy it was once I tried it out.
    This is wha- I do…… ?????? http://www.netjob80.com

  35. Google pay 97$ per hour my last pay check was $8500 working 1o hours a week online. My younger brother friend has been averaging 12k for months now and he works about 22 hours a week. I cant believe how easy it was once I tried it out.
    This is wha- I do…… ?????? http://www.netjob80.com

  36. my Aunty Sophia just got a nearly new BMW X4 SUV just by some parttime working online with a lap-top
    This is wha- I do…… ?????? http://www.netjob80.com

  37. In much of Europe the drinking age is much lower. In the UK 5 year old kids are allowed to drink at home with parental supervision. When kids grow up with something it doesn’t have that forbidden cool. Making something illegal only adds to the intrigue. Making something illegal doesn’t stop anyone, including kids, from partaking in something it only forces them to get it from questionable and possibly dangerous people, or from dangerous practices such as stealing. Though I haven’t checked the numbers it’s probable the percent of problems with underage drinking (not counting the drinking itself which may or may not be problematic) are similar between the US and UK. The only difference is here in the US people are subject to fines, arrest, and/or imprisonment who otherwise would not. Making something illegal doesn’t stop behavior it only drives it underground. Better, if a kid does have problems with alcohol they do it at the kitchen table where parents can notice it than running into trouble out in the woods so someone can find the corpse later.

  38. uptil I looked at the paycheck which was of $6898 , I have faith …that…my father in law was actually erning money parttime from their computer. . there neighbor had bean doing this for less than nine months and at present cleard the loans on there apartment and got a great new Nissan GT-R:…… ?????? http://www.netjob80.com

  39. my roomate’s half-sister makes $71 /hr on the computer . She has been laid off for 5 months but last month her pay was $17321 just working on the computer for a few hours
    …… ?????? http://www.netjob80.com

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