Words That Catch the Eyes of DHS Spies
As a result of a Freedom of Information Act lawsuit by the Electronic Privacy Information Center, the Department of Homeland Security (DHS) recently revealed a list of words its analysts use to search social networking sites and other parts of the Internet for signs of terrorism or other potential threats. The list, which is part of the Analyst's Desktop Binder produced by the department last year, includes terms, such as Al Qaeda, dirty bomb, sarin, and anthrax, that might seem like obvious red flags (although it is not clear how many actual terrorists openly use such words) along with broader terms that might be threat-related but probably are not, such as plot, drill, exercise, law enforcement, and assassination. (That last one might signal the attempted murder of Irish pop singers, but it is more likely to indicate a discussion of the Obama administration's counterterrorism policies.) There are also some real puzzlers, such as pork, agriculture, cloud, team, and Mexico. I assume the intended subjects are, respectively, swine-carried diseases, farm sabotage, poison gas, terrorist task forces, and drug trafficking. But how often will those bets pay off?
The Daily Mail reports that DHS officials "insisted the practice was aimed not at policing the internet for disparaging remarks about the government and signs of general dissent, but to provide awareness of any potential threats." Still, mistakes do happen. Remember the British tourists who were barred from the United States because of jokey tweets about "destroy[ing] America" and "diggin' Marilyn Monroe up"? It might be best to avoid reviewing any movie or TV show with a plot about an attack on agriculture by terrorists wielding biological weapons. Or even offering health advice that emphasizes prevention and involves medical screening, cutting back on pork, drinking lots of water, and getting plenty of exercise (possibly including team sports). And you definitely should not discuss "Words to Avoid Online If You Don't Want to Join the Government's Watch List."
Addendum: Ed Krayewski beat me to this story by a week.
[Thanks to Mark Sletten for the tip.]
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How about radical words like "freedom" or "Ron Paul"?
Or libertarian code words like "monocle"?
Thanks to Cavanaugh, velleity is now on that list. Good job, Tim. Way to ruin it for the rest of us.
Why don't you just send a letter to DHS, asking them to take it off the list? Why are you always complaining and not taking, you know, action?
Ah, that's too much effort.
Fascist
That list is further proof that we will never reach Peak Retard.
Haven't we been over this before, sage? Was it not decided that you were proof we'd never reach Peak Retard?
If I were sage, I would say
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
And it's not even Friday.
Because everything after me is more retardeder? Makes sense.
That's retarded.
See?!? SEE?!?
Don't be a fahkin' reeetahhd!
Now see here, sir! I didn't come here to be insulted.
That's what you think.
Hey, nice! That's actually the first time I've heard that response to my obvious bait. The most common are:
"Where do you usually go?"
"Why did you come here?"
"Then leave!"
"Oh...surprise!"
Damn it, sage, it was a setup for quotes from Duck Soup!
(The correct response is "You swine!")
Give me that again!
All I have to say is decapitated Tijuana swine blister.
But enough about that gay Canadian porn cannibal...
"6/4"
See? The Chi Coms have a head start on DHS:
http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/.....1OSHSI.DTL
President bomb threat assassinate al queda terrorist gun explosion. Attack cell threat C4 machinegun overthrow.
Armed insurgent torture murder death kill.
However, Finnish art theatre metric buttload.
Derka derka, Muhammed jihad!
http://www.reasonmademedoit.com
"Yes, it is. Now, suck my cock! Ha ha ha, juuust kidding. "
"Wow! You really ARE committed!"
"AIDS AIDS AIDS AIDS AIDS AIDS AIDS AIDS"
Shit, piss, fuck, cunt, cocksucker, motherfucker and tits.
Dear United States Department of Homeland Security,
kindly eat shit and die.
Yours hatefully,
someone whose name is none of your fucking business.
This is more security theater. There's no way the super-secretive DHS, who won't even tell you if you're on their no-fly list or not, is going to aid and abet the enemy by providing Al Qaeda with a nice list of words to avoid. They've only bothered to release this list because they know good 'n' well that Al Qaeda never ever uses any of those words in their communications anyway.
I think you're giving them too much credit. You should at least consider the possibility that DHS considers encrypted communications beyond al Qaeda's capabilities.
They certainly told that 18 month old kid she was on the no-fly list.
the practice was aimed not at policing the internet for disparaging remarks about the government and signs of general dissent
No, it wasn't aimed at that, but it just happens to be a happy side effect.
If someone says what I know they're going to say I may leave and never come back. So don't say it.
Don't say "it"? Couldn't get very far in life not saying "it."
Say what? The Star Wars Holiday Special?
Yeah, that's right. I went there.
"Say 'it' again motherfucker!"
I wonder if it catches "argiculture" and "asasination" too. Otherwise only spelling champion terrorists will fall into their web of illusion.
Or if they sort out non letter characters or a 'k*i*l*l t*h*e*m a*l*l, l*e*t A*l*l*a*h s*o*r*t *e*m o*u*t' gets through.
I sat here staring at "argiculture" for a couple minutes trying to figure out waht is wrong with it.
What?! How did "quagmire" not make this list?
Have a heart. You know the typical IQ of a Family Guy fan doesn't make for fun reading.
as someone who is nominally on the DHS 'watch list', i think GILMORE should be added as a scare-word.
i think trying to get myself off the list only raised my risk-level. :/