Latest Bitcoin Scare: It Funds Assassination of Politicians!


Reason 24/7

Many years ago, a man named Jim Bell wrote the essay "Assassination Politics" about setting up an anonymous online market for funding hits on control freak government officials and discouraging people from working within the machinery of the state. Bell ended up on certain government officials' radar, as a result, and was soon busted for harassment of government officials, and certainly not for exercising his free speech rights, whatever you or I might suspect. His essay just sort of languished, as the years went by… And then came Bitcoin…And Tor.

And don't you know, now there's an Assassination Market inspired by "Assassination Politics"?

Writes Andy Greenberg at Forbes:

As Bitcoin becomes an increasingly popular form of digital cash, the cryptocurrency is being accepted in exchange for everything from socks to sushi to heroin. If one anarchist has his way, it'll soon be used to buy murder, too.

Last month I received an encrypted email from someone calling himself by the pseudonym Kuwabatake Sanjuro, who pointed me towards his recent creation: The website Assassination Market, a crowdfunding service that lets anyone anonymously contribute bitcoins towards a bounty on the head of any government official–a kind of Kickstarter for political assassinations. According to Assassination Market's rules, if someone on its hit list is killed–and yes, Sanjuro hopes that many targets will be–any hitman who can prove he or she was responsible receives the collected funds.

For now, the site's rewards are small but not insignificant. In the four months that Assassination Market has been online, six targets have been submitted by users, and bounties have been collected ranging from ten bitcoins for the murder of NSA director Keith Alexander and 40 bitcoins for the assassination of President Barack Obama to 124.14 bitcoins–the largest current bounty on the site–targeting Ben Bernanke, chairman of the Federal Reserve and public enemy number one for many of Bitcoin's anti-banking-system users. At Bitcoin's current rapidly rising exchanges rate, that's nearly $75,000 for Bernanke's would-be killer.

If you think Silk Road upset the feds, you ain't seen nothin' yet.

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  1. "Latest Bitcoin Scare: It Funds Assassination of Politicians!" That's a feature, not a bug.

  2. "Latest Bitcoin Scare: It Funds Assassination of Politicians!"

    Sounds like it's straight from the promotional literature.

  3. Forbes has been going after Bitcoin and Silk Road quite a bit lately.

    1. Greenberg is generally pretty good about tech things, he covers a lot of btc stuff.

      I didn't view it as a negative article (those will be all the derivatives starting tomorrow.

    2. What do you mean 'going after'? Forbes seems to love BTC and Silk Road.

  4. According to Assassination Market's rules, if someone on its hit list is killed?and yes, Sanjuro hopes that many targets will be?any hitman who can prove he or she was responsible receives the collected funds.

    Wait...a hitman needs to prove that he did it? So the guy has to say 'Yes, I killed that politician' over the internet to someone that he doesn't even know?

    I have a feeling that no one is going to do this.

    1. It can be done anonymously. Place the bet with an encrypted message, do the deed, present decryption key for the message. If the message has the correct day, payout.

      Use TOR for anonymizing (maybe another step too)

      Even if the site is a plant, if you were careful about your browser/etc, they still can't trace it to you.

    2. It's like a death pool. If you bet on time of death closer than whoever actually causes it, you win!

  5. Wait until someone sends Andy Greenberg an encrypted email about ShitCoin, the digital currency helping people swap their shit by literally swapping shit. You mine ShitCoin by sitting on the toilet and taking a picture of your shit when you are done. Its unique digital signature, computed with the SHT-256 hash, is what gives it its value.

      1. God damn it! My kids are in the room! My 2 year old won't stop imitating what he heard from that lovely webpage.

      2. The Cosby Button was worth every ... BitCoin?

      3. You were correct. I appreciate that.

  6. Hit $900 a few minutes ago. Now showing $742. I thought we might see 1k tonight.

    1. "It's $300-I'll wait until it pulls back."


    2. CoinDesk has it at $535. I think we're seeing the pullback. Thank God.

      1. I was thinking I'd buy the dip. Coinbase doesn't even have any to sell.

        Supply is getting quite limited, it looks like:


  7. Coming soon to theaters:

    A Secret Service agent (George Clooney) teams up with a New York Times economist (Matt Damon) to investigate an online forum that selects politicians for assassination.

    Their investigation uncovers a conspiracy involving a pair of corporate billionaire brothers (Alan Arkin and Richard Dreyfuss), a Tea Party presidential candidate from Kentucky (Sean Penn), and an anti-government leaker (Jonah Hill).

    From producer Harvey Weinstein and director Robert Redford it's


    1. Written by Aaron Sorkin, I assume.

      1. Yes indeed. I forgot to mention the main target of the assassination is a populist progressive Senator from Massachusetts who aims to become the first female president and vows to bring economic and social justice to America. She'll be portrayed by Jodie Foster as brave, idealistic, but also tough and unwavering. Near the end of the movie she gives a glorious speech praising the workers of America and vowing to not let right-wing hate and fear prevent the country from moving forward.

        1. Near the end of the movie she gives a glorious speech praising the workers of America and vowing to not let right-wing hate and fear prevent the country from moving forward.

          Then she'll harken back to the days of her Native American ancestors and perform a raindance in order to combat the horrifying drought caused by global warming.

        2. Do they fade out from the scene showing the sniper lining her up in the crosshairs? Or do we see blood?

          1. The assassin is a deranged White Hispanic played by Dwayne Johnson. He hates women and blacks and has an obvious fetish for guns, which he easily collects due to our nation's lax gun control laws.

            Clooney squares off with him as the Senator prepares to give her nomination speech. Just when the assassin gains the upperhand Damon appears and shoots him. He then quips "I just stood my ground!"

            1. Aaron Sorkin should be terrified that you are going to take his job, because that's funnier than anything Sorkin could dream of writing.

              1. I've always wondered: if a vapid little twat like Ezra Klein could become a successful pundit at a prestigious newspaper with only a BA in poli sci from UCLA, why can't I?

                Liberals and progressives aren't at all hard to understand, it isn't that hard to repeat the talking points and elaborate on the agreed narratives.

              2. That's a pretty low bar unless you are counting unintentional comedy.

            2. I predict it will be critically acclaimed and gross about $375 in theaters.

      1. The perfect choice to play Krugnuts.

        1. It's intrinsically paternalistic.

    2. ...a New York Times economist (Matt Damon)...

      I think he already is one.

  8. Do you know that both Euros and US Dollars have been used in payoff of political corruption and assassination? My god, we got to ban that evil currency.

  9. Funny thing is, I halfway want to throw together a deadpool site (mainly for friends)

    Btc would make it simple to place and collect bets.

    The trick is, how to do it without it becoming an assassination market.

  10. Dick Cheney says Obama lied when Obama actually liked, Chris Matthews is SO FUCKING ANGRY!

    Well, we can argue, as we do here, about the problems implementing the Affordable Care Act. But is this, calling the President a liar, the new language of American politics. Or is it a language specially treated for the country's first African-American president? Is this President of a lower caste than those elected to the office before him. Or do those on the right believe he even is the legitimate president of the United States, or that someone like him could be? Well, this we know, the top Republican in the country refuses to condemn the birtherism of his allies. There's even been lower-level attacks before like this one, but the fact that a recent vice president can talk openly like this tells us that a new ugliness has come to right-wing discourse.

    What did Cheney say that is so thinly veiled in conservative racism?

    DICK CHENEY: We look at the mess that has been created out of "Obama care" by the president having said, You can keep your policy if you like it, you know, guaranteed, period. That turns out that was a lie. And he repeated it over and over and over again.

    Boy. That sure is...accurate.

    1. You know it's not allowable to criticize a black president. It's a tradition.

    2. But is this, calling the President a liar, the new language of American politics. Or is it a language specially treated for the country's first African-American president?


    3. How has Matthews not stroked out by now? Him and Bill o'Reilly both should have had aneurisms by now.

  11. Oh ho ho, this game should be interesting. Aqib Talib is already getting frustrated enough with Steve Smith that it's already getting nasty. And it's only the first quarter.

    1. There's that Panther lack-of-discipline I know so well.

        1. There we go. Three points ain't much though.

          1. I hope the 9ers are watching; there is a way to score points on the Panthers and they need to learn that.

          2. I'm up 1.1 points in fantasy with the carolina d and facing ridley. This is nail biting.

            1. Fuck the Pats. I was so close to beating you. Thank god for Jim Beam, my lord and savior.

              1. You will still probably make the playoffs. Even if I win out and get to 7-6 I might not.

    2. I always root for a rerun of the Pollard hit on Ridley from last year. It's sweet to see a NE player actually lose consciousness.

    3. Anonymous Bit Coin bounties for NFL cheap shots?

  12. If Bernenke mysteriously turns up dead, I wouldn't want to be a barefoot Japanese junkie!

    1. When would you?

  13. Infamous loserdopian, Jim Bell thought this stuff up years ago.

    Now go into the rabbit hole of information that is connected to that wiki.

    Start with his original essay.

    1. I got very into the cypherpunks archives a few months back. Some very interesting reading, and very slick to see the start of a lot of the things going on now. Wikileaks, Tor, Bitcoin even.

      The whole "universal surveillance" thing got me going on it a lot more.

    2. Wow, he got 10 years in prison for "stalking"? He would have been better off just raping a few women, as long as they were Federal Agents of course.

  14. Wasn't someome basically wishing for this in the comments a couple weeks ago? Well guess what, it's happening now.

    1. I hope that same person also wishes for Christina Hendricks to turn to porn then.

      1. I didn't make it to my bunk.

        1. There's no shame in it.

  15. I like bitcoin better already.

    In case the government complains, just tell them "I learned it from you"

    1. In case the government complains, just tell them "I learned it from you"

      Also, the bitcoin assassins can claim the moral highground, since they aren't planning to engage in puppycide.

  16. Paris on lockdown as cops search for gunman

    A manhunt is continuing in Paris after a gunman attacked offices of the newspaper Liberation and fired outside the HQ of the Societe Generale bank.

    A photographer, 27, was critically hurt at Liberation. The gunman later forced a motorist to drive him to the Champs Elysees before allowing him to go.

    Police are looking for the same man who broke into the Paris offices of the 24-hour news channel BFMTV on Friday.

    Police have now been stationed outside all the main media offices in Paris.
    Our correspondent says that, for a time on Monday, a police helicopter hung over the Champs Elysees amid fears the gunman might be heading towards the Eiffel Tower, but it is speculated that he might have gone into the metro.

    People were encouraged to stay indoors.

    Police said the suspect was calm and assured, and each time has walked away from the scene of his attacks.

    French media say the suspect told the motorist he hijacked that he was armed with grenades.

    President Francois Hollande, who is in Israel, said the priority was "to stop an individual who had tried to kill and could try to kill again".

    Paris Strong! Or, Paris Solide!

    1. I thought this stuff only happened in Murika with all their gun crazies. Aren't guns illegal in France?

    2. Quick, somebody check on the location of MATT DAMON!

  17. Tis all in pieces, all coherence gone.

    California condom law results in pornographers fleeing Sacramento.

    Progressives ruin everything.

    1. A bedroom/household set will look the same in Arizona as it would in California.

      1. Yeah but the sick views in X-Art videos won't be the same unless they build a condo on the edge of the grand canyon or something.

    2. a typical porn film permit costs about $1,000

      That price seems totally justified.

      1. Hell, that could add up to ten grand or so a day for some of those companies.


      2. Wait, you need a permit?

    1. Ha and Ha Ha!

    2. 57,730 Washington State Obamacare Sign-Ups, 51,368 of Them for Medicaid

      It's like that in Murland, also, where the exchange is working quite well... for dumping more people into Medicaid that is...

  18. OT: Shriek exposed! http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/si.....14209.html

    1. The remark, which Bashir made on his MSNBC program, sparked a firestorm of criticism. Bashir was responding to a comment Palin made in which the former Alaska governor compared the U.S. debt to slavery.

      Hmm. I don't know how Palin framed her statement, but U.S. debt is a bit like slavery, and for Bashir to

      MSNBC commentator Martin Bashir issued an apology on Monday for suggesting that someone should defecate on former vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin.

      1. ..squirrels.

        Respond in that way tells you how the left actually support slavery debt.

        Is there a house liberal who can tell us what's so great about national debts?

        1. Free money for pols to spend today!

        2. I believe the textbook answer is that government debt can be used to counter business cycles: it can be issued or retired as needed to prevent inflation, counter recessions, etc. Why anybody thinks that government has the sense to do that properly is beyond me, though.

          1. Somehow they never get to the "retired" part. The debt just goes up, in good times and bad.

  19. Bitcoin's deflationary nature means that the prices on people's heads will increase every year, even if no one adds new money. That's kinda scary.
    Is there a way for people to withdraw their funds? Or does the system never forget or forgive?

    1. I hadn't thought about the deflationary aspect on this. It's a long time before it turns deflationary, although the value of the coins would still be expected to be going up.

      I'd think you couldn't let people take back their bets -- it gets gamed by anyone who learns of the death early, and it means you may not be able to pay out as much as you expected.

      1. This one isn't run like a straight death pool (they're much more upfront about it).

        But yes, I don't think there's a good way to let people withdraw their funds without making it gameable.

        I just find it a bit sad that someone who stops doing bad stuff (in the view of the people who wanted him dead in the first place) still will have a price on his head, forever.
        That's not a great incentive to quit your job and right your wrongs (especially if it means losing the security detail).

    2. Once all BTC are "mined" the amount in existence will be fixed.

      1. Yes, but:
        1. Some coins get lost over time.
        2. If things go well the amount of real goods sold using bitcoin will continue to increase.

        This means price deflation: the real value of the bounty increases every year (because it's a fixed amount of coins).

        1. I wasn't disagreeing with you.

      2. But what if a meteorite of solid bitcoin hits the Earth?

  20. Not cool, not cool at all. Is Barrack Obama a shitty president? Yes. Has he played fast and loose with individual rights and the rule of law? That's probably being generous. But you know, we have laws and rules in place to deal with that sort of thing. Ineffective? Probably, but murder sure as hell isn't an appropriate response. And I'd expect the anarchists to at least believe in proportionate force.

    1. What about the Bernank?

      1. No, I don't support assassinating central bankers. Or lying heads of intelligence agencies.

        1. Then go troll over on Yahoo or somewhere.

      2. A ruler who orders drone murder strikes seems a lot more justifiable target than a banker who only makes life miserable for people, without actually killing any directly.

        Not that I would ever condone either case, but I don't see any argument at all for the latter.

    2. Probably, but murder sure as hell isn't an appropriate response. And I'd expect the anarchists to at least believe in proportionate force.

      Ummm, you ARE talking about the drone mass murdering President who has bragged that he is "good at killing people", aren't you?

      Assassinating him would be textbook proportionate force.

      1. Please understand that what I am about to say is not a defense of U.S. drone policy. But the U.S. and Obama as Commander in Chief are not engaged in some random killing spree for shits and giggles, and they aren't purposely targeting people who they know are innocent civilians. Afghanistan is a theater of war and drone strikes are not a priori unjustified. They too often lead to fuck ups for me to think they are good to use in practice, but collateral damage doesn't rise to the level where I think assassinations are a proportionate response. If you disagree, then fine, but really think through the consequences of that, because you'd basically be saying that any military leader that authorized an operation that didn't go as planned or that resulted in collateral damage is fair game for assassination by groups that aren't parties to the conflict. Run with that far enough and you can easily get to a point where anyone, anywhere, who accidentally killed someone while they were trying to legitimately defend themselves, actually forfeited their life. I reject that.

        And yes, I know we've droned a U.S. citizen. But if you are going to argue that the State's legal process is an illegitimate way to seek justice for that, then you are implicitly rejecting the very concept that makes killing a U.S. citizen different than killing any other combatant.

        1. ^+1 "Rule of Law"
          Obo is a fool and perhaps subject to impeachment. But...

        2. What legal process for justice are you referring to? I am not aware of any attempt to seek justice in the cases of US citizens being drone targets.

          Your arguments also lose a bit of their weight when you consider that the drone strikes in question haven't occurred in JUST Afghanistan.

      2. If a family member of any person he killed with a drone were to do him in, that person was subsequently captured and brought to trial, and I was on their jury, I wouldn't vote to convict. Right now, Obama claims to be wielding wartime powers without having obtained a declaration of war from the congress, so the prospects for any legal recourse are just about nil.


    3. He deserves it for the Drug War alone.

      But you know, we have laws and rules in place to deal with that sort of thing.

      No we don't. The law says he can spy on, indefinitely imprison or kill anyone he wishes.

      1. You'll have to point out where in the law it says that.

        1. The PATRIOT Act and NDAA.

          1. Those aren't laws, they are usurpations. They'd have to comply with the bill of rights to be laws.


            1. Then he made himself an outlaw, by his criminal usurpation.

  21. Really classy, WalMart. Can't even pay your staff enough to support themselves, then you ask the customers to donate so they can eat? unbelievable.

    1. Figures union thugs would hate mutual aid.

      1. Not sure if GLG is a union thug or just a run of the mill brain-dead lefty thug.
        But there is not doubt of his thuggery; the asshole is willing to use a gun to enforce his opinions on anyone, right asshole?

      2. Not sure if GLG is a union thug or just a run of the mill brain-dead lefty thug.
        But there is not doubt of his thuggery; the asshole is willing to use a gun to enforce his opinions on anyone, right asshole?

        1. I'm a pacifist, go away.

          1. Guy LaGuy|11.18.13 @ 11:19PM|#
            "I'm a pacifist, go away."

            You're a slimy thug who would use a gun in a New York minute on anyone who doesn't agree with your desires.
            Fuck you, slaver.

            1. How am I enslaving you? Provide an example.

              1. Stop responding to Sevo's ad hominem attacks and actually answer my question about the numbers that I posted down below.

                Walmart's margins are too low to give its employees raises because there are so many employees. Walmart really does not make much profit because of how thin the margins are.

                The company would be obliterated if they gave the raises you're talking about. How would anyone be helped by the destruction of America's number 1 employer?

                1. You are taking the money for raises out of profits. I suggested taking them out of management and executive salaries.

                  1. Guy LaGuy|11.18.13 @ 11:31PM|#
                    "You are taking the money for raises out of profits. I suggested taking them out of management and executive salaries."

                    Asshole, I suggest you start a company and do as you please.

                  2. Dumbest comeback I have ever seen. Their CEO made $21 million dollars last year. Take every penny. That's enough to provide Walmart workers with approximately $20 a piece.


                    Take every penny from every executive and you'll end up with approximately $70 per employee. It's a simple issue of multiplication. When you've got a dozen high level executives and 1.1 million store workers, no matter how much those dozen executives are paid, it won't be enough to give the store workers a raise of any legitimate value.

                    This is how math works. Learn it, and then maybe you'll stop being a leftist.

                2. Irish,
                  You think some slime-ball like that has any concept of margins? You might just as well explain that the success of the company and the ability to offer low cost goods has to do with hiring good management.
                  That twit isn't bright enough to understand any sort of cost-benefit analysis.

              2. Guy LaGuy|11.18.13 @ 11:26PM|#
                "How am I enslaving you? Provide an example."

                Enslaving me? Not a chance, you asshole.
                And it's only that you haven't had a chance to have the government enforce your slavery on others that you haven't succeeded.
                Fuck you, you slimy thug.

                1. What Slavery? You're not making any sense.
                  Take more meds. Or less.

                  1. Guy LaGuy|11.18.13 @ 11:30PM|#
                    "What Slavery? You're not making any sense."

                    You are making plenty of sense; all you want to to is enslave anyone who makes more than you 'think' they should and distribute it to others.
                    You'd qualify nicely for a position with those who murdered millions in pursuit of your infantile fantasies. Slaver.

                    1. I said that?
                      *checks thread*

                      I don't think I said that.
                      Quit arguing with the Stalinist that lives where your brain should be.

                    2. Guy LaGuy|11.18.13 @ 11:38PM|#
                      "Quit arguing with the Stalinist that lives where your brain should be."

                      Oh, so you propose to accomplish this by persuasion?
                      You remain the Stalinist; the New Soviet Man is only achievable by force, slaver.

    2. Ummm, those employees might have been recently deeply in debt and unemployed, and are still getting back on their feet.

      Are you seriously criticizing a corporation for trying to help the poor and needy?

      1. If I read the story correctly it is donations from other employees.

      2. They can help the poor and needy by paying them more.

        1. Which would hurt the poor and needy who don't work for Walmart who would then have to pay higher prices.

          Why do you hate poor people who don't work for Walmart, Guy?

        2. Guy LaGuy|11.18.13 @ 10:55PM|#
          "They can help the poor and needy by paying them more."

          Did your employer search out employees in trouble and pay them extra?
          Fuck you with a rusty shovel, slaver.

          1. Pay less to management and the executives.

            1. There are 1.1 million walmart workers worldwide. If you gave every one a 500 dollar raise, that would be $550 million.

              If you gave every one a $1000 raise? One Billion and one hundred million dollars.

              How much profit does Walmart currently make? 3.7 billion dollars.

              In other words, a raise that isn't even big enough to make leftists get off their backs would take a full third of Walmarts profit and obliterate the value of its stock. They would then be less able to raise new capital for expansion and new stores.

              A relatively small raise to every employee would send Walmart into a death spiral. You'd know that if liberals could do math.

              1. "In other words, a raise that isn't even big enough to make leftists get off their backs would take a full third of Walmarts profit and obliterate the value of its stock. They would then be less able to raise new capital for expansion and new stores."

                And GLG would be cheering, since some one, somewhere isn't making more than that slimeball.
                I applaud you keeping your temper, but I doubt the clear explanations have any better effect on the slavers than do the ad homs.

            2. Guy LaGuy|11.18.13 @ 11:19PM|#
              "Pay less to management and the executives."

              I certainly hope you are donating all your retirement to poor people.
              Or are you some sort of a lying hypocrite on top of being a slimy thug?

        3. As long as it's not you, eh?


    3. 1. It's a single store
      2. It's set up by store employees
      3. They are asking other employees for donations, not customers


      1. Pretty much the dictionary definition of mutual aid.

        1. Yeah, reading the actual article, and the part where they explain what it actually is, warmed my black, shrivelled libertarian heart.

    4. Guy LaGuy|11.18.13 @ 10:41PM|#
      "Really classy, WalMart."

      Really sleazy on your part, asshole:
      "Some of the food collected last year went to a mother whose child support benefits had stopped, so it helped provide her children a holiday meal, he said."

    5. Yes, the people who were paid to stock shelves at mom and pop stores that were operating on razor thing margins were always paid $50,000 a year.

      As everyone knows, stockboy was a tremendously lucrative position before mean old Walmart came and drove the wages down. I'd love to see how much a shelf stocker at a mom and pop store in 1967 Alabama was making. I'm willing to bet they'd be below the poverty line...and that's adjusted for a comparatively less affluent 1967.

      I especially love this part:

      In September, Bill Simon, president and chief executive officer of Wal-Mart U.S., said that less than half of the company's U.S. employees make more than $25,000 per year. The federal poverty level for a family of four is $23, 500.

      So if both parents work at Walmart and each make $24,000 a year, they'd be making $24,500 more than the poverty rate.

      The only way this would be a problem would be if something, like government disincentives or left wing social policies for example, resulted in the breakup of families so that there was only one wage earner.

      1. The only way this would be a problem would be if something, like government disincentives or left wing social policies for example, resulted in the breakup of families so that there was only one wage earner.

        Even in that case, there is nothing preventing the parents from continuing to cooperate when it comes to providing for their children. And if one parent completely skipped out on their responsibilities, that would hardly be Walmart's fault. But wouldn't it be nice if some fellow employees came together to help out a coworker in need, in that case? Oh, wait...

    6. GLG, since you're so convinced that cutting executive pay is the solution to this problem, please tell us which executives' pay you're going to cut and how much of a raise that would work out to when spread across WalMart employees.

      1. I did that for him. Every dime from the CEO is $20. I found a stock site claiming total compensation for the executives is $61 million. That's about $55.

        It's the same problem when progs think we can just 'TAX THE RICH!' There aren't enough rich people as a percentage of the population for an increase in their taxes to be of any relevance.

        1. It's like they haven't even read Bertrand de Jouvenel!

  22. Now we get Sad-Angry Tom Brady!

    1. The best of all possible results! Plus him f-bombing as he walked off the field was good stuff. The Patriots are dangerous as hell in situations like this and the Panthers stopped them.

      Of course, the Seahawks are 10-1. (cough, cough)

      1. You know who else has only 1 loss, and also lost only to Andrew Luck and the Colts?

    2. And Belichick is fucking pissed. The reporters seem afraid of him. I would not want to be in his locker room tonight.

      1. That reporter must have pissed his pants when he became the 4th person to ask Belichick if the ref gave him an explanation for that non-call on the last play.

        1. Seemed like a good non-call. Although the refs usually give the receiver the benefit of the doubt on catchability.

      2. Did you catch the very uncomfortable 20 seconds at the start of that presser, before a reporter got up the courage to ask a question in a very low voice?

        1. Yeah, I was trying to figure out if they were waiting for the presser to start, or if they were terrified of Belichick's murderface. Looks like the latter. Hilarious.

          1. Well hey, if you piss him off, he'll sick Hernandez on you.

            And hell, he already has Blount and Spikes on that team, both of whom were "bad boys" in college. Hell, Spikes tried to gouge out a UGA running back's eyes during a game.

            It's like "Belichick's Home for Wayward Youths".

            1. Don't forget Aqib Talib freaking out on Steve Smith, too.

              How can he reach these KEEDS?!?

  23. Ahahaha, screw you Mr. Bundchen!! Go cry to your horse-faced pig wife.

  24. If that's not pass interfereance I don't know what is.

    1. It's not pass interference if there is no reasonable expectation that the intended receiver could have actually caught it without interference. There was no way that was getting caught by a Patriot.

      1. Actually there's a case to be made that had Gronk not been held up, he could have come back to the ball.

        If there was a chance he's there at the same time as the defender, then he conceivably could have come away with it.

        That's what Steve Young is saying, and he's a lawyer, and rich, thus ipso facto better than you.

        1. Oh, he's definitely better than me, since all I care about is the Patriots losing...and they did. If you give me Brady Angry-Sad Face, I no longer care about the rules.

          Also, there was no way the Gronk was getting to that, sorry.

          1. You've clearly not watched much of the American Handegg if you doubt that Mr. Robert Gronkowski could have made the reception had he not been interfered with Luke Kuechly.

          2. I like watching the Pats lose as much as anyone. But it was a bad call.

            1. It was. And the guy in the booth even said D-holding was possible there. So what the hell?

            2. I've seen the replay plenty of times. The non-call was justified. The pass was uncatchable.

        2. I don't care about the Patriots, I just enjoy watching the Panthers to lose.

          1. And weird sentences. I to love those.

  25. Obama: 100 million Americans have enrolled in new insurance plans

    President Barack Obama told a conference-call audience of 200,000 progressive volunteers on Monday evening that 'more than 100 million Americans' ? in a nation of less than 314 million ? have successfully signed up for health insurance via the Affordable Care Act.

    Boasting of his administration's skill in encouraging taxpayers to buy health insurance policies through public marketplaces, he claimed that 'in the first month alone, we've seen more than 100 million Americans already successfully enroll in the new insurance plans.'

    Obama didn't skip a beat or make any effort to correct himself, and his next comments did little to clear up the mistake.
    'You've got a million Americans who've completed an application for themselves or their families,' he continued. 'And that represents about a million-and-a-half people.'
    It's likely Obama meant to initially take credit for 100,000 success stories, rather than 100 million. But his mangling of the statistics put him off-track by a factor of 1,000.

    The numbers add up once you include all 57 states.

    1. Or he was just flat out lying because people who would volunteer for him don't fact check anything, ever, because to them words are more important than actions or reality. You know not a single one of those volunteers will question those numbers.

      1. Good point. For these OfA cultists this was the equivalent of God talking to Moses.

      2. I would bet that the "100m" claim starts showing up on lefty sites come tomorrow.
        I can't remember how many repeat the 'I can see Russia from my house' hoax as real.

      3. This with shiny brass knobs on.

        He uttered the number because Obama literally depends on the low-information voter, and he banks on his high-information media boosters to not question or call him on it. It's a fucked up symbiotic relationship that has gotten him successfully elected twice.

        Never underestimate the power of the low-information voter.

    2. Did you see that the OFA chat also had technical difficulties?

      Who the fuck is running the IT department at the White House?

      1. I recall the former IT Czar had a master's from University of Maryland, University College--essentially, the original University of Phoenix. Maybe the new guy is less qualified.

    3. What are a few orders of magnitude when you have the people's best interest at heart?

    4. What's a hundred orders of magnitude in a statistic in a public speech? At least he provides footnotes.

      1. * footnote: actually, being off by a factor of 1,000 is 3 orders of magnitude.

  26. Twitchy: Amanda Marcotte likens pregnancy to the common cold

    Shane Conklin @nilknoc02
    @AmandaMarcotte there's also a big difference between "consequence" and "punishment." pregnancy is a natural result of a particular act, no?

    Amanda Marcotte @AmandaMarcotte
    @nilknoc02 Interesting. So you're opposed to medical care generally, then, because it mediates the consequences of living?

    Shane Conklin @nilknoc02
    @AmandaMarcotte there's also a big difference between "consequence" and "punishment." pregnancy is a natural result of a particular act, no?

    Amanda Marcotte @AmandaMarcotte
    @nilknoc02 Catching cold is the "consequence" of being around other people. I assume you refuse antibiotics, correct?

    Shane Conklin @nilknoc02
    @AmandaMarcotte that couple in the video, do you think any prolifers forced them to do anything? or was that their choice? @MZHemingway

    Amanda Marcotte @AmandaMarcotte
    @nilknoc02 I'll ask you one more time, or you're blocked. Since colds are the "consequence" of socializing, do you refuse antibiotics?

    She really is bat-shit insane.

    1. That's sort of a meaningless exchange unless you establish that both parties either 1) agree the fetus has human rights, or 2) agree it doesn't.

      Because if it doesn't, then the assumption that abortion is just fine really would be no more consequence than taking antibiotics to kill germs. But if you assume the unborn does have rights, then the comparison is on it's face ludicrous.

      1. I disagree. Marcotte's argument makes no sense because she *concedes the point* in this argument that the fetus is alive.

        Amanda Marcotte @AmandaMarcotte
        @jeremylatzke Taking antibiotics terminates more life than an abortion. One organism < the billions you kill with antibiotics.

        In this tweet, she essentially says that it doesn't matter even if the fetus is a living being.

        You could use the exact same argument to justify all murder. After all, taking antibiotics 'terminates more life' than shooting one person in the face!

        It's a ludicrous argument, no matter what side you come down on.

        1. Equating the life of a bacterium to a human life (or whatever you want to classify a fetus as) is like the ultimate liberal near/far false equivalency. I'll have to remember that one.

        2. Alive doesn't necessarily mean has human rights. Lots of things are alive but don't have rights...like bacteria.

          It's a common element in this argument for the abortion side to believe that while the fetus is living tissue, it does not yet possess human rights, whereas the anti-abortion crowd of course believes the opposite.

          1. It's still a ridiculous argument. Look at this sentence:

            One organism < the billions you kill with antibiotics.

            She's saying that one organism is exactly the same as any other, therefore there's no moral difference between what organism you destroy.

            This exact argument justifies just about any murder. By her logic, no killing is immoral since you probably stepped on an ant hill on the way to commit the murder.

          2. I would assume that one could be pro-choice (and not believe a fetus is a person) without equating a living human fetus with a virus. But then I tend to be optimistic about the intentions of the other side until proven otherwise.

            1. You would assume that, being from Houston, like a fag.

      2. She's equating a human being with an infection, something unwanted and detrimental.

        Her equivalence would logically mean that killing any living thing is morally inconsistent with opposing the termination of human life via abortion.

        1. It's classic liberal near/far equivalence. No one is supposed to care about their own children or family members than any other person on the planet. Which is why it is necessary to redistribute everyone's money in an equitable manner, have all children raised in an equitable prison public school (unless you are a liberal living in DC), etc. All monies should be distributed by the Fed, this community stuff is really just racist, inbred, selfish, etc.

    2. Plus a cold is a rhinovirus, so taking antibiotics will actually cause harm by upsetting the balance of healthy and neutral bacteria in the gut and other places, whilst not affecting the virus at all.

      1. Take your mansplain' logic and patriarchal biology knowledge out the door!

      2. Taking antibiotics will actually cause harm by upsetting the balance of healthy and neutral bacteria in the gut and other places

        Nah. Anitbiotics might give you an upset tummy or make your poo runny but not anymore then say aspirin or vitamin c or a sugar pill.

        The big worry about using antibiotics when you don't need to is a communal worry. It could help selective forces generate a super germ which is immune to antibiotics.

        1. We'll just have to agree to disagree on this one. I think gut biome health is important and can have long term consequences, and I think antibiotics can disturb this. It can also lead to yeast infections in women as the neutral bacteria is killed.

          1. No, you don't have to agree to disagree. Corning is absolutely wrong here, you're absolutely right, and here's Captain Dog.

            1. Thanks!

              But I thought you were a cat person...

              1. Warty goes both ways

    3. She really is bat-shit insane.

      She's still in her deep depression over the Duke Lacrosse team lynch mob's failure to bring her the bloody heads of three white boys.


  27. Smoking hot woman legally kills a lion in South Africa and donates all of the meat to impoverished Africans and liberals freak out and try to get her banned from the country.

    I guess they don't really care about feeding the hungry after all.

    We do ethical hunting and all meat from animals hunted is distrubuted to the local community. Funds generated from hunting goes towards fixing the border fence that was washed away in the 2013 floods; combating poaching which is excessive in this area due to close proximaty to ZImbabwe and running a sustainable conservancy. We have lost 2 eland, 4 giraffes and numerous other animals in the past 2 months that were killed by spears and dogs. We control our game numbers to prevent starvation of animals.

    So the money from this hunt allowed them to combat legitimate poaching, rebuild infrastructure, and feed the hungry. The left really knows how to pick its battles.

    Now that that's over, I give you more of the smoking hot hunter woman. Good lord.

    1. Firstly, her site doesn't run well for me, so I'll just put this here

      Secondly, you think facts matter to them? All they see is a privileged white woman with guns engaging in behavior deemed quintessentially conservative.

      It's doubleplusungood!

      1. Actually, I would bet serious money that her attractiveness makes their viciousness more extreme. There is an astounding amount of jealousy and hatred, just more than you can imagine.

        1. Go look at the youtube videos linked from the blog I posted. The liberals went to her youtube videos and started wishing death upon her.

          They really are the sort of people who'd be lynching black people in 1940's Alabama. They have different enemies, sure, but they have the same lynch mob mentality and unwillingness to reason.

          The only thing protecting us from the truly evil fringe of the left is the fact that they're also cowards. They're too busy wetting themselves and biting their nails over THE EVIL GUNS! to actually go fort and commit the crimes they desperately want to see committed.

          Of course, I'm only talking about the crazed fringe of the left, and not the average Democrat. Most Democrats and moderate liberals I know would be disgusted by how these nitwits are behaving.

      2. She's hot, but the (apparent) breast implants detract, for me at least.

          1. Well, I do, obviously. You can like whatever you want, I'm not into the fake titties.

          2. Personally I am anti-implant. sarc probably is too.

          3. Frankly her face looks pretty ugly to me in that pic.

            1. Her face is a bit on the longish side, but I watched some video and she's definitely hot.

    2. I think it has more to do with it being a lion.

      Lions are cute and cuddly. At least they look like they are.

  28. Nude activists cause a stir at protest in Castro


    1. mightier than the sword.

  29. Another O-care supporter loses her coverage and whines that this is not how it was supposed to go.


    1. "She [...] championed Obamacare,"
      And now she gets what she deserves!

    2. Anticipated. Go whine somewhere else.

  30. Ron Swanson is not discouraged.

    1. CA Fish and Game has been using those for a long time.

    2. The man was released from jail last Sunday, but only after posting $1,120 US in bonds.

      He is scheduled to appear in court next month and faces up to a year in jail for taking deer during closed season, discharging a firearm on a roadway, and taking deer from a right-of-way.

      He wasn't taking deer. It was a robot.

      In a just world he'd get hit with the firearms beef and that'd be it.

  31. Dating advice from male model Antonio Sabato Jr

    The answer is abs.

    1. 1. Be attractive.
      2. Don't be unattractive.

      1. Yep. It's the buy-low-sell-high rule of human sexuality.

        Unfortunately, it's true.

    2. Don't forget all those Sci-Fi channel movies he does.

    1. "The stadium weaves together Qatar's past with its progressive vision for the future," a spokesperson for the company said.

      Ahahahahaha. Fuck those corrupt FIFA cunts.

  32. I've been pissed at the DMV before, but this may be going a bit far:

    A court has rejected a 60-year-old man's attempt to invoke the ancient right to trial by combat, rather than pay a ?25 fine for a minor motoring offence.
    Leon Humphreys remained adamant yesterday that his right to fight a champion nominated by the Driver and Vehicle Licensing Agency (DVLA) was still valid under European human rights legislation. He said it would have been a "reasonable" way to settle the matter.
    Magistrates sitting at Bury St Edmunds on Friday had disagreed and instead of accepting his offer to take on a clerk from Swansea with "samurai swords, Ghurka knives or heavy hammers", fined him ?200 with ?100 costs.

    1. That guy's my fuckin' hero.

    2. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NN30YMzja6Y

      "You don't fight with honor."

      "No. He did."

  33. Apprently there is a Japanese game show called "Orgasm Wars," where one contestant attempts to make the other climax against his will.


    1. Is it "against your will" if you volunteer to go on a show where you know you will be "forced" to orgasm?

      1. I didn't mean it in that way. I suppose I should have phrased it as "against their best attempts at restraint."

        1. Directed more at the article than at you, which also uses that language:

          The challenge: Can Takuya bring Sawai to orgasm against his will within 40 minutes?

          1. It's about as "against his will" as that "forced" bi situation at Warty's house last weekend.

  34. Stupid new thing lets you text odors to people.


    1. Those idiots obviously do not know human beings very well.

      When the traffic turns out to be 99% ppl texting farts to eachother, they will act just as shocked as Microsoft did when ppl used the new note-making thing on x-box live to just draw dicks everywhere.

  35. "Essentially, we've been working with regulators for a structured approach for Bitcoin customers to be compliant," says Waters. "We set up an API to work with their systems and we supply reporting tools they need for their databases. Which bitcoin addresses belong to a person? That's the problem we're solving."



  36. I'd use the Jaqen H'gar strategy -- Arya Stark

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