Tonight on The Independents: Red Meat Wednesday, With Katherine Mangu-Ward, TV’s Andy Levy, Chris Moody on Yesterday’s Election, the Co-hosts on #StandWithRand2, and Two Minutes Hate!

A shorter stand, to be sure. |||Tonight's episode of The Independents (Fox Business Network, 9 p.m. ET, 6 p.m. PT, repeats three hours later) starts off with Party Panelists Katherine Mangu-Ward and Red Eye co-host Andy Levy, who will be chewing on most of the following topics: 1) President Barack Obama's public response today to the Veterans Administration health-care fiasco; 2) the number of people who claim disability in the United States reaching near 11 million; 3) former National Football League players suing the NFL for giving them unprescribed drugs; 4) alarming news that parents are naming their babies "Kale."

The great Yahoo News political reporter Chris Moody will join to make sense out of last night's election results. The co-hosts will talk about the comparatively muted (but no less righteous) #StandWithRand 2.0, and then vote on which statement was more ridonkulous—Rep. Joe Garcia (D-Fla.) saying that El Paso's low crime rate proves that "communism works," or Donna Brazile’s recent Tweet saying:

"Imagine no possessions. I wonder if you can. No need for greed or hunger. Imagine all the ppl sharing the world." John Lennon #RaiseTheWage

Speaking of hashtags, your very favorite segment, Two Minutes Hate, is back. Whom among you shall be quoted?

Follow The Independents on Facebook at facebook.com/IndependentsFBN; follow on Twitter @ independentsFBN. Click on this page for more video of past segments.

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  • Plàya Manhattan.||

    "2 minutes of hate"

    Get your comments in early, boys.

  • Grand Moff Serious Man||

    They're probably filming today's episode and Friday's episode right now, so too late.

  • BigT||

    Likely already finished when they put this up so Matt can go whoring, Kennedy can join the mile high club on her way back to VA, and Kmele can snort a bowl of coke.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    So the black guy uses coke?

  • ||

    This'll be my third straight TI miss while still in country.

  • ||

    Pourquoi, Welch, perche?

    I hate you.

  • Grand Moff Serious Man||

    The co-hosts will talk about the comparatively muted (but no less righteous) #StandWithRand 2.0

    I suppose it's less notable because the Dems just needed a simple majority to pass cloture. I watched the vote live on CSPAN.

    Bernie Sanders and Ron Wyden both voted yes on the nomination. So much for principles.

    , and then vote on which statement was more ridonkulous—Rep. Joe Garcia (D-Fla.) saying that El Paso's low crime rate proves that "communism works," or Donna Brazile’s recent Tweet saying:

    "Imagine no possessions. I wonder if you can. No need for greed or hunger. Imagine all the ppl sharing the world." John Lennon #RaiseTheWage

    Sure Donna, I'll be right over to your place today so you can "share" your stuff with me. You have a lot more than I do so check your privilege.

  • Brett L||

    I think we can all agree that if whatshisname said he shot Lennon because of Imagine, it would still be horrible, but not incomprehensible.

  • mr simple||

    "We send thousands of boys to Vietnam to fight the commies and it's a good thing but I shoot one and it's a crime?" - Mark David Chapman

  • Whahappan?||

    I can't remember the exact quote, but Dennis Leary had a line in his stand-up days to the effect of "six shots and not one of them hit Yoko?!?!"

  • Scruffy Nerfherder||

  • Jerry on the sea||

    Imagine no possessions. I wonder if you can.

    Alas, someone took away my mind.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    The vote seems to be between a quote about communism and a quote about El Paso.

  • Grand Moff Serious Man||

    El Paso proves the need for gun control and immigration reform.

  • Soros' Wank-noose||

  • Almanian!||

    Excellent

  • BakedPenguin||

    Damn, I've only been one TMH the one time. I need to start upping my game.

    You know why Kennedy could never be on ESPN's Pardon the Interruption? Because she never asks for pardon.

    No, that sucks.

  • Plàya Manhattan.||

    Sometimes the interruptions get so bad, I put the show on mute and listen to my wife.

  • GILMORE||

    THAT is good material right there.

    Well done sir.

  • OldMexican||

    Tonight on The Independents

    3:02 PM


    Aren't we getting a little ahead of ourselves, guys?

  • Plàya Manhattan.||

    They need material for the 2 minutes of hate. They were scraping the bottom of the barrel last time.

  • ||

    Maybe we can get them to put it on at Green Hut Cafe and we can shout abuse at the TV.

    Did you invite Shackford, BTW?

  • Plàya Manhattan.||

    Oops, doing it right now.

  • Plàya Manhattan.||

    Done.

  • OldMexican||

    There are times I think that The Independents becomes the forum for Kennedy to make strange and unusual challenges such as the one she made to Rick Santorum when she dared him to cite a single libertarian that argued against the existence of government.

    Hoppe? Rothbard? Block?

  • Christophe||

    Maybe she just wanted to stump the bastard, even if the question does have an answer?

  • OldMexican||

    "Imagine no possessions. I wonder if you can. No need for greed or hunger. Imagine all the ppl sharing the world." John Lennon


    How irony-impaired must a person be to conflate the Lennon song which asks "No need for greed..." while at the same time linking to a hashtag that says "RaiseTheWage"?

    What, when people ask for higher wages it is NOT because they're NOT greedy, all of a sudden?

  • OldMexican||

    By the way, you should read the entry at the Rational Wiki on Anarcho-capitalism just to give yourselves a little dose of unintentional humor.

    Let's just say that the "Rational" part of the Wiki is nowhere to be seen.

  • Plàya Manhattan.||

    Add that to the list of words co-opted by progies.

  • Soros' Wank-noose||

    TI should just get it over already and have Myerson and Santorum duel to the death, in-studio, for the TMH. Maybe one of them could wear ear-hoops.

  • Army of the 12 Monkeys||

    Instead of hate mail, we should get caught-up on Bernie MaxSmith's trouble adapting to newly-single life. I think I read somewhere on the interwebz that he's been crashing at Gavin McInnes' place, which could well be pushing his sanity to the brink.

  • Francisco d'Anconia||

    INDEPENDENTS ASSEMBLE!

  • Bam!||

    REASON, THREAD BUMP!

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Forget it, Bam. It's Reasontown.

  • Grand Moff Serious Man||

  • ||

  • Specail Sauce||

    Needs more cowbell.

  • All-Seeing Monocle||

    Only the truly desperate are going to find the thread way down here.

  • Specail Sauce||

    +1 Me

  • Slammer||

    *sneaks in, looks around*

  • Dances-with-Trolls||

    After the non-stop nut-punches today's Reason has been I went looking for it. This is relief. How sick is that?

  • Derpetologist||

    Is this an anti nut punch?

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tKQSPk-Egc4

  • Derpetologist||

    Is this an anti nut punch?

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tKQSPk-Egc4

  • Derpetologist||

    Nut punches from squirrels are the worst.

  • Slammer||

    Claws!

  • Dances-with-Trolls||

    It will make anon-bot happy at least.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    Every man's death diminishes me, for I am involved in mankind. Therefore, send not to know for whom the bell tolls, it tolls for thee.

    -John Donne

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Prediction: Hooops.

  • All-Seeing Monocle||

    Not a very bold prediction. Unless you mean Cavuto in which case, fairly bold.

  • Slammer||

    And fake alligator skin?

  • Derpetologist||

    A slam poem about slam poems about rape:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Wu7Ax78hXo

  • Derpetologist||

    A slam poem about slam poems about rape:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Wu7Ax78hXo

  • Dweebston||

    Rape Poem To End All Rape Poems

    If only.

  • Bam!||

    Lizard skin is back.

  • Slammer||

    And nothing on underneath, I bet.

  • Specail Sauce||

    She's wearing a carpet.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    A tuxedo and a picnic blanket.

  • Derpetologist||

    Hannity is not a smart man, and yet he always manages to find progs who make him look like a genius:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ozR72rVR2NY

  • NebulousFocus||

    Hannity is fucking terrible.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    He should bite his lip, otherwise how do we know he feels our pain?

  • Grand Moff Serious Man||

    I actually think the purple hair works for KMW.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    What? Was KMW leaning over a pain bucket earlier today? Was she throwing up in a toilet with colored bowl cleaner? Was she huffing but doing it wrong?

  • Bam!||

    I didn't even notice the purple hair. I thought it was part of her shirt or a scarf or something.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    What's a pain bucket?

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    I have a cold.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    I thought it was where they collected the blood spilled during the interrogation.

    "Did you take Bob's lunch out of the fridge? DID YOU?"

  • Pathogen||

    You don't want to know..

  • Dances-with-Trolls||

    So is it me or is this the best segment that TI has ever done?

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    You just like that Foster has barely been acknowledged. Racist.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    No, I get it now. Her hair is chameloid and trying to match her blouse.

  • poloniusium||

    I'm looking forward to GILMORE's analysis of Kennedy's top.

  • Slammer||

    And KMW's hair...which I like.

  • Specail Sauce||

    Pain Bucket :)

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Yeah.

  • Specail Sauce||

    I'd buy their album.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    All this wonky discussion...what about celebrity catfights?

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    My old man just got in the VA system and so far he's okay with it. But he's just in the checking his health out phase.

  • poloniusium||

    THE GRAPH!

  • Derpetologist||

    Is Matt going to tell me more about the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints?

  • Specail Sauce||

    No Solicitors!

  • Slammer||

    Matt's jacket actually looks like a tuxedo top.

  • Bam!||

    Wait, was Bernie wearing cowboy boots? Did he go Brokeback after his divorce?

  • Bobarian||

    Why do you think he got divorced?

  • ||

    Hey man, if you guys want a Canadian to clean up your mess I don't mind being told I eat babies and don't care for people.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    I hate Bernie's boots. And I don't even acknowledge footwear, that's how bad they are.

  • poloniusium||

    So how does the aftershow work? I kept seeing old aftershows when I went to their site.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Well, first of all, the actual show is still going on. Second, you have to click on the "Watch Live" link. And last, this episode was pretaped back in March so no live aftershow tonight.

  • Slammer||

  • poloniusium||

    oh. popup, that's probably the problem. Thanks.

  • All-Seeing Monocle||

    They don't do them every night. If they're not actually doing a live after-show I think you get a re-run.

  • ||

  • Derpetologist||

    Protester asks why man has a right to his own money:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wD809fp6i_0

  • Grand Moff Serious Man||

    Anyone else think Katherine Mangu-Ward looks a lot like Maggie Gyllenhaal?

  • Francisco d'Anconia||

    A bit.

  • ||

    The one day I can watch and the thread is buried.

  • poloniusium||

    This guy doesn't know where he is.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    So does this guy want a singular message or not? I'm getting mixed signals.

  • BiMonSciFiCon||

    He doesn't have a dog in the fight, I don't think. Pretty sure he's a libertarian.

  • ||

    Yes, they are that lacking in principles.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Read some of the things I've said about Mitch, but he ain't getting my money.

  • Bam!||

    "Win at any cost?" So literal team politics; doesn't matter what happens so long as our team is the ones doing it.

  • poloniusium||

    It seems like it's just a roundabout way of saying that the tea party movement has been co-opted and exhausted.

  • BigT||

    Or the establishment just learned how to use some of the same issues, neutering the T party's novelty.

  • Bobarian||

    The fact that Mitch McConnell had to campaign for the primary says that the TP isn't quite dead.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    What? we're getting both? I thought we were voting on the communist quote we're going to talk about.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    What's with the beta male among all the high-powered businesswomen?

  • Derpetologist||

    I thought they were real estate agents.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    Why, hello there, annoying Volvo voiceover lady!

  • GILMORE||

    iThe Independents Attire Review, 21 May 2014

    Teenage Übermensch-Edition

    - Kennedy: AAAHHHA!! We came expecting 'pink' - instead, we get "Attack of the Poison-Iguana Woman"?? The Chinese collar adds to the whole, 'Evil Asian Temptress' look. It needs oversized fake-gold fingernails dripping poison, a tongue spike, and a lot of incense burning around her. This isn't 'a dress' or 'an outfit' - this is "someone's going to a costume party".

    - Matt: GAHHH!!?!? A FUCKING TUX? What the hell is going on here? Opera night? Does he do Wednesday night playing in a wedding band? Maybe Kennedy and Matt are part of some amateur James Bond theatre production. Matt will have to ditch the glasses and also take up smoking if so. I hope he knows how to play Baccarat.

    - Kmele: ...uh. OK, good. Fuck, I was SO expecting something like 'a viking costume'. Instead, another variation on the 'plaid shirt sub-sportcoat'. Again, I think when he uses the mono/bi-chromatic shirts it can work really well; what I'm less crazy about are the tri-color+ plaids that get a little funky.

    - KMW: Ok, now we have a rejected member of the upcoming X-Men film. Dazzler, maybe? Something in my brain says 'Stevie Nicks' even though I'm not sure there's any logical connection there at all.

    - "TV's"-Andy: I now get the impression that maybe Kmele and Andy weren't invited to "the party".

    Any explanations for tonight's attire-oddities are welcomed.

    Dankeschön

  • Army of the 12 Monkeys||

    I agree, though I would nominate Kennedy as the Bond Villain of this show. And Matt may be overcompensating for past wardrobe choices.

  • Winston||

    So if you had a choice between the US being turned into a military dictatorship with some soconish elements or a Communist dictatorship which would you prefer?

  • Pathogen||

    Cyanide...

  • Winston||

    Wise choice.

  • GILMORE||

    I'd flee to Somalia, libertarian-paradise.

  • Francisco d'Anconia||

    Is there a difference between the two?

  • Winston||

    The former might have a lower body count?

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Revolución.

  • Winston||

    So the latter?

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    The Five Stairsteps?

  • Winston||

    Also I would be more optimistic with the anti-cop sentiment if previous anti-cop fueled revolutions lead to something better. Like wishing for some Bastille-type rebellion which you know led to Robespierre and Napoleon...

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Communists never do well when they don't control the message.

  • ||

    Don't communists love building walls?

  • Winston||

    Need to keep the fascists saboteurs from entering and emigration that steals from the collective!

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Mr. Firefly, tear down this wall.

  • ||

    With my hands?

    I kicked John Deere out of my country. I got no equipment.

  • Pathogen||

    Yeah, the Soviets were fabulously pro immigration, the trains to Siberia ran 24/7...

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    If I find out Welch is wearing jeans with that tux jacket I will totally lose my shit.

  • All-Seeing Monocle||

    Hammertime parachute pants

  • Army of the 12 Monkeys||

    Bermuda shorts and flip-flops.

  • Derpetologist||

    DC is full of govt employees and has an awful crime rate.

  • ||

    Lennon was a jerk indeed.

    But he's lionized.

  • Winston||

    Only after he died. He himself predicted that!

  • ||

    'Imagine' has to be one of the most over rated, over played, insufferably annoyingly grating song in the history of everything.

  • Derpetologist||

    Most people are reluctant to criticize a murder victim.

  • poloniusium||

    Like all politicians that people think well of?

  • BigT||

    Lennon was the true creative force behind the Beatles. Paul is schmaltzy, George dippy, and Ringo stupid.

  • Winston||

    He was DARK and ANGRY so he must be good amirite?

  • Lord at War||

    Let's compare...

    John married Yoko Ono.

    Paul married Linda Eastman.

    Ringo married Barbara Bach.

    Stupid!?

  • Dances-with-Trolls||

    So did the TI crew get put through some kind of TV boot camp? This has been on topic, smoothly flowing, and intelligent. Not at all what I was expecting.

  • poloniusium||

    It seems to depend on what cocktail of drugs the crew is on that night.

  • Slammer||

    Might be because it's taped.

  • Dances-with-Trolls||

    Ah, that explains it.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    Heh heh, J. Edgar Hoover would freak!

    "Now, sir, I'm agent Baker, heh, heh, because I'm like so baked...now, they tell me you've been smuggling marijuana...and not sharing any with your local law enforcement..."

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Ha, yeah, he looked proud. Deer caught in headlights.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Who in charity drives doesn't want to invite half the audience to turn off the telethon?

  • Derpetologist||

    Did they steal the Gatorade logo for the Topical Storm?

  • ||

    Oh, shut up Myers you fucking Leaf fan.

  • ||

    That is, Maple Leafs.

  • Slammer||

    Was he one of the Bob and Doug McKenzie guys?

  • Bobarian||

    NO! Blasphemer!

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    It's pluralized as leaves.

    And the Habs have the worst fans in the history of the universe except for Filthadelphia.

  • Bam!||

    The recorder was invented to torture music teachers.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    Yeah, but not good angels.

  • Winston||

    I wish Loomis had killed Myers.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    I don't think those two things are mutually exclusive.

  • Derpetologist||

    Worldwide Recorder Concert?

  • Winston||

    Instead of a Topical Storm how about a Tulpical Storm?

    Get Hydra and Rollo in there as well.

  • Slammer||

    I hope that's not bleeped on the clips later.

  • Bobarian||

    It was the brown note that caused him to do that!

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    IT'S A BOMB!

  • ||

    I thought this was the most annoying sound:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KAWoP1kncRE

  • Bam!||

    Knew what it was before I clicked it.

  • ||

    Jim Carey's apex?

  • Grand Moff Serious Man||

    Hey Kennedy, are you made of copper and tellurium?

  • BigT||

    Forgot nitrogen.

  • ||

    Wait, so they can spell out Ass on screen but have to bleep it out when spoken?

  • Winston||

    This donkey discrimination must end!

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Welch wants to punish her with an internship at reason.

  • Pathogen||

    Binders of interns..

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    I don't think you're supposed to talk about Lucy.

  • Pathogen||

    Dad.. What's a "Steigerwald"?

  • poloniusium||

    Did kennedy just ask us to back it up "right 'ere"?

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    "Come on, Tolson*, it's good stuff, straight from the evidence room..."

    *J. Edgar Hoover's buddy

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Yeah, that's why LAPD is so mellow.

  • Grand Moff Serious Man||

    Also Matt, the girl in question was president of her school chapter of Students Against Drunk Driving. So, you know, fuck those guys.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    Do *all* the big faceless corporations do ads with reassuring homey-sounding voiceovers?

  • Slammer||

    No. Some have Samuel Jackson doing a coon-ified, step and fetch, scary black man.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    All right, maybe it was an obvious point.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    In my day you rubbed dirt in it.

  • Specail Sauce||

    NFL is my pimp!

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Sullum bogarts them all.

  • Derpetologist||

    Maybe KMW was auditioning for the Scott Pilgrim vs. World sequel.

  • Grand Moff Serious Man||

    Maybe she had an interview with Ron Paul and came off down the mountain with his purple aura

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Welch read in reason about reason's lack of drugs.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    heh heh

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    Honey, Peaches, Ginger and Pepper aren't new.

  • poloniusium||

    Baby Bourbon.

  • Specail Sauce||

    Coco? Racist!

  • Grand Moff Serious Man||

    Maple, Peaches, Ginger, and Cinnamon: the lineup at your local strip joint.

  • ||

    Banana and Beets didn't make it?

    Cocaine?

  • Slammer||

    Cheetos.

  • ||

    Ringolos.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    I always pick the kmele off my pizza.

  • ||

    Kmele stains on my driveway are a bitch to remove.

  • poloniusium||

    Did KMW does say velveeta was good?

  • poloniusium||

    just* say

  • Pathogen||

    Formica Davis thought so..

  • BigT||

    Nosmo King

  • ||

    I thought the 'K' was silent in Kmele's name.

  • Pathogen||

    Racist..

  • Winston||

    So as far as I can tell libertarians have the choice between either sticking to principle and losing while getting some minor reforms implemented or selling out and winning while getting some minor reforms implemented. Is that correct?

    Then there's the third choice of violent revolution that won't result in a dictatorship and repression of the opposition.

  • Bam!||

    These four panelists seem like they enjoy each other company.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    Good chemistry, as it were.

  • All-Seeing Monocle||

    Yeah, no token morons tonight.

  • Winston||

    Heh, Heh, you said "token."

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    There's plenty of time for Kennedy's daughter to work out daddy issues around the pole.

  • Grand Moff Serious Man||

    Given who her mom is you think she's going to have daddy issues? How do you think being constantly interrupted by her mother during discussions at the dinner table is going to make her feel?

  • GILMORE||

    because Kmele knows his strippers.

  • poloniusium||

    raycisssssssssss

  • Winston||

    What's the proper libertarian position of the width of the G-string?

  • poloniusium||

    What are you, some kind of puritan snocon? No g-strings at all.

  • All-Seeing Monocle||

    The market has spoken.

  • Slammer||

    No way, man. They're hot.

  • Winston||

    So you are an extremely thin libertarian?

  • Pathogen||

    Capellini to Vermicelli

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    Yes, make the man a judge who believes in extrajudicial execution!

  • Winston||

    You Know which other judge approved by Democrats supported extrajudicial execution?

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    Dredd?

  • Pathogen||

    Judge Dread?

  • Andrew S.||

    Dredd?

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    Consensus!

  • Grand Moff Serious Man||

  • Winston||

    I didn't knew TEAM BLUE liked Judge Dredd.

  • poloniusium||

    HAHA, gentleman. Kmele is a natural comedian.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Welch: Rand Paul is a perpetual loser.

  • Winston||

    So he isn't a sellout after all.

  • Andrew S.||

  • ||

    Teachers union president Jerry Jordan said he did not know the circumstances surrounding the child's death, but said, "I do know that the building is woefully under-resourced. And now we have lost a baby. This is horrific."

    Go fuck yourself JJ. Like some school nurse would have prevented this.

  • Grand Moff Serious Man||

    Bernie Sanders: SINO?

  • Specail Sauce||

    Senile Incontinent Nambla Organizer?

  • Derpetologist||

    I want the Volvo lady to do the termite killin' voice over.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    That would be awesome

  • GILMORE||

    Please, anyone = guesses on why the hell Matt & Kennedy are dressed like that?

    Is there an after show? Explanations are required.

  • Bam!||

    Occam's razor: Kennedy has dressed in that before and Matt has no fashion sense.

  • poloniusium||

    Cocaine's a hell of a drug.

  • Derpetologist||

    Matt wants to tell you about another testament of Jesus Christ.

    Kennedy wants so badly to be a Christmas tree.

  • GILMORE||

    Mormons wear tuxes...

    ...and you dress up lizards for Christmas.

    Yeah, see what I mean? someone's got to have a better explanation.

  • Derpetologist||

    His tux looked like a suit to me. Keep in mind that one of my regular outfits used to be a black wifebeater, a green trench coat, purple pants and black flip flops.

    I think I will dress up a lizard for Christmas. And I will name him Herb and walk him around the neighborhood while singing lizard carols. And I'll be wearing a black wifebeater, a green trench coat, purple pants and black flip flops.

  • GILMORE||

    "
    Derpetologist|5.21.14 @ 10:08PM|#

    His tux looked like a suit to me.'

    Yes, and aren't you the person who said he doesn't like suits and rocks a jesus beard?

    Satin-lapels? Tux.

    Its not subtle either.

  • Derpetologist||

    You cannot even begin to fathom how little interest I have in fashion, even for a man.

    I think about clothes as often as Kalahari Bushmen think about differential equations.

    One time, I torn a out the crotch in my jeans. No matter, I thought. My underwear will keep me covered. Then one of my underpants got a hole. No matter, I thought. My pants will cover it up. But one day, I worn both torn articles at the same time. I noticed my mistake when I was sitting with my knees apart on a Chicago L platform and saw my scrotum sticking out. Fortunately, I had a hat and was able to cover up that way.

    Would you like to hear more of my fashion adventures?

  • Plàya Manhattan.||

    Yes, please.

  • Dances-with-Trolls||

    Is there a business owner in America credulous enough to by that Startup NY ad?

  • Derpetologist||

    Yeah! I got a mention!

  • Slammer||

    I saw! Congrats!

  • Francisco d'Anconia||

    Derp!

  • Francisco d'Anconia||

    Eddie!

  • poloniusium||

    Grats!

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    Yes!

  • Slammer||

    Nice!

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Caps lock, as always, cruise control for awesome.

  • ||

    Burn! On Kennedy.

  • GILMORE||

    Matt was genuinely like, 'uh, what?'

    He's like, "I Studied With A Speech Coach!?!"

  • Pathogen||

    Brutal..

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Colin nailed it.

  • poloniusium||

    I really do think there is a pharmacological component. She barely interrupted at all tonight.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Maybe that forced time off wasn't about that production assistant she killed. Re-education.

  • Grand Moff Serious Man||

    I need to step up my A game of hate.

  • Slammer||

    The family's trust one was great.

  • ||

    I was disappointed it wasn't a post by Sandi about taking a dump.

  • Bam!||

    The best of The Independents? That'll be short.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    AH! Lou Dobbs.

  • Derpetologist||

    Criticize my haiku, will you? You try working in a seasonal reference while criticizing a motormouth woman.

  • ||

    Needs more seasonzzzz!

  • Pathogen||

    You couldn't have worked "make me a fucking sammich" into that?

  • GILMORE||

    Kennedy, white skin
    Shade of winter snow falling
    Bitch just won't shut up

  • poloniusium||

    A true master!

  • Derpetologist||

    HEY BERNIE- LOOK HERE^^^^^^^^^

    I demand this poem be featured on the next 2 Minutes of Hate.

  • GILMORE||

    STANDING DOBBS!?

  • Slammer||

    'Rhoids?

  • GILMORE||

    He's all excited about republican primary victories, he's treating it like Super Tuesday or something.

    No one cares.

  • Pathogen||

    In your face TeaBaggers.. mediocrity wins again!

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    All in all not bad for a live blog thread Welch didn't think enough of to bump.

  • Pathogen||

    Reason commenters triumph in the face of adversity...

  • Big Chief||

    So I think the soon-to-be Judge Barron needs an appropriate nickname for his horrific, bloody and unconstitutional beliefs. I thought Judge Butcher Baron or Bloody Barron (Potter reference), for the alliteration, but with a last name like Barron it seems like there should be better alternatives. Red Baron would be passé. This gentlemen deserves something along the lines of Fauxcahontas.

    Suggestions?

  • Dances-with-Trolls||

    Judge Barron-ly Skimmed Through the Fucking Constitution?

  • Slammer||

    Barron Harkonnen?

  • poloniusium||

    The Baron of Innocents Blood?

  • GILMORE||

    Baron Von Killudrone

  • Big Chief||

    Harkonen is very good, but I gotta go with the drone reference! If it turns out Barron is a coke whore or a pedophile maybe I'd go with Harkonen.

  • poloniusium||

    He hasn't denied sucking cocks while fondling baby boys.

  • Dances-with-Trolls||

    I have to say that it's the best TI I've seen so far. Maybe there is hope?

  • GILMORE||

    it *was* better than normal.

    its because it was filmed and the 'party panel' was not retarded.

    But they were dressed like freaks. I am confounded.

  • Dances-with-Trolls||

    It wasn't adversarial, I think, and allowed for the panel to get into a little more detail on why they believe what they do. Not a whole lot, but far more coherent. It was an Independants show focused on what libertarians think of things rather than giving another forum to the same tired statist bull-shit artists and then arguing on their terms for four frenetic minutes at a time.

  • GILMORE||

    I am crushed by the fact that my repeated jibes at The Independents for being "TMZ-Light" for the FBN crowd failed to achieve Hate-Status.

    I may have to start actually *trying* now. I've been spoiled.

  • Sevo||

    "Oprah-after-dark" didn't get it either.
    But that was before there was a '2-minutes'.

  • Pathogen||

    Nobody likes a sore loser.. now, bask in Derp & GKC's brilliance...

  • Derpetologist||

    ♫ We are the champions, We are the champions! No time for losers 'cause we are the champions!

  • Winston||

    So how do you make the two minutes hate?

  • Derpetologist||

    Here are my other winning comments:

    "The purpose of the aftershow is to make the regular show look good."

    and

    "All the bullshit on the bottom of the screen obscures Kennedy's boobs. This is an outrage."

    Alas, they no longer mention my name...

  • Francisco d'Anconia||

    Be a witty asshole.

  • Bobarian||

    We're all half way there.

  • Winston||

    The Independents: A bunch of homo losing losers who like to lose and like the buttsecks.

  • Winston||

    Matt Welch is proof that former muppets do have a purpose.

  • Derpetologist||

    There's no such thing as a former Muppet. Muppets ride or die forever.

  • Winston||

    Matt Welch: the Lost Muppet?

  • Winston||

    This show is the most fucking shit fuck shit fuck cunt cock shitfucking sack of animal testicals since Pink Lady and Jeff.

  • Winston||

    This show is the most fucking fucketty shit fuck shit fuck cunt cock shitfucking cocksucking shitty shit fuckettyass fuckitty fuck fuck fuckers fucking sack of anally greased shitheaded animal testicles since Jack Lalanne.

  • Winston||

    I haven't such a collection of boring white old men vanilla losers since Lawrence Welk was in his mother's pussy.

  • Winston||

    Kennedy is proof that Lee Harvey Oswald should have packed more bullets.

  • Winston||

    They should stop taking clothing tips from Kramer and Disco Stu.

  • Winston||

    This show is so anemic that it will cause Obama's drone victims to stop bleeding.

  • GILMORE||

    He said, 'witty'

  • Winston||

    I'm the wittiest wit since the wallpaper defeated Oscar Wilde.

  • Winston||

    Kennedy is so ugly she'll make Santorum come out of the closet.

  • Winston||

    Kennedy is so ugly that she receives FEA funding.

  • Winston||

    Matt Welch is so fat and ugly that the Ex-Gays are using him in their "treatment."

  • Winston||

    The show is so thin sarcasmic would fuck it.

  • poloniusium||

    That one is good, but they won't read it because no one but us would get it.

  • Winston||

    This show makes Warty's rape dungeon look like Risa.

  • Winston||

    My ears haven't heard such screeching dissonant noise since I last listened to Nickleback.

  • Winston||

    The only thing worse then your child labor made monocle being smudged is listening to The Independent with the mute off.

  • Winston||

    Okay so that is 16. I think that is enough? How do I rate? -10/10?

  • BiMonSciFiCon||

    I think Kennedy is great, but I wish she didn't cut off the other Independents. I don't really care if the commie gets cut off, but Matt and Kmele?

  • BiMonSciFiCon||

    I think I agree with TV's Andy Levy here. The players were getting screwed.

  • Bobarian||

    The players were getting big money to play a game. It is really hard on your body, but everyone with more than two brain cells knows this. I have little sympathy.

  • poloniusium||

    It is really hard on your body, but everyone with more than two brain cells knows this

    We're talking about football players here.

  • poloniusium||

    Probably. I would not be surprised if the team docs lied to the players about how awesome drugs are.

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