Parody of Fifty Fifty's "Cupid," written and performed by Remy. Mastering and background vocals by Ben Karlstrom.
LYRICS:
A wine maker from an early age,
They call me the Chris Brown of grapes.
James Suckling thinks I'm just OK. (I hate this white, so 95.)
I'm feeling homely.
Why's their wine industry thriving? Ours is lonely.
Sir, we're an island inhabited by penguins.
So skeptical, huh? Well it's more than skepticism—
It's time we ask for more, more, more.
I put a tariff on this fluid.
Because that other country's stupid.
It feels good to be helping our wine industry.
Their fluid is so dumb.
A maple producer as you see,
I staple trunks like Roker's MD.
We're exporting less than we get!
It's better to give more to get it?
That's what I am trying to say!
But the benefit is concentrated but the costs—
I'm feeling homely.
Why's their syrup business thriving? Ours is lonely.
Are you serious? We have no maple trees here.
So skeptical, huh?
It's time we ask for more, more, more.
I put a tariff on this fluid. (You're kidding, Why?)
Because that other country's stupid.
They'll buy syrup locally! There is no maple trees!
Their fluid is so dumb.
- producer: Austin Bragg
- producer: Meredith Bragg
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qy-G5A9vmXo
Trump picked my pockets last night pre-flight
Zero hour 9:00 a.m.
And I’m gonna be broke
As a bum by then
I miss liberty so much I miss my life
It’s lonely without Nancy Mace
On such a worthless flight
And I think it’s gonna be a long, long time
‘Til Tariff Man brings me ’round again to find
I’m not the rich man they think I am at home
Oh, no, no, no
I’m not a MAGA man
Tariff Man, burning up my cash up here alone
There's gotta be a Trump version of The'Man Who Sold the World' too. Maybe Bowie really was a time traveler.
What a dumb comment.
Well, I'd rather be stuck with an extra case of Cabernet than a tanker of maple syrup.
Well....I'd rather have my cabernet, and my maple syrup.
This fantasy where everything Americans consume is made by Americans is silly. And it is a silliness brought on by a complete misunderstanding of what trade deficits are.
I can sympathize with limited objections to Tariffs on certain strategic things- I am very skeptical of most such objections, but there is an argument to be had. But Navarro's philosophy is clearly that any trade deficit is a bad deficit, and it is not just economically illiterate it is going to make Americans poorer.
I think the worst aspect is what it does to the 2026 midterms, the chances of impeachment, and JD Vance's chances in 2028. Winning over Kackling Kamala by only 1.5%, and winning the House by only three seats, shows how many people hate Trump, not how many like Kamala or the Dems, and upending the economy bodes ill for beating the midterm trend of the President's party losing.
Catchy. Singing about dumb fluid.
Even before tarrifs I couldn't find anywhere in the states to buy acerglyn. Maybe I just didn't look hard enough?