Juggalos

Juggalos Unite! Why Insane Clown Posse Fans Were Never a Gang

The government's stupid attack on the fans of a horrorcore rap group.

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Every year Juggalos paint their faces, pull on hatchet man t-shirts, and drink way too many bottles of Faygo soda at the Gathering of the Juggalos music festival, which came to a close this weekend. While the fans of Insane Clown Posse (ICP) have found a common bond over their favorite underground music acts and similar upbringing, nothing may have brought them closer than their opposition to the FBI's classification of Juggalos as a "hybrid gang," in their 2011 National Gang Threat Assessment report. The report said Juggalos could "exhibit gang-like behavior and engage in criminal activity and violence."

The classification from the federal government was troublesome because local law enforcement often look to the feds for guidance on gangs in their communities. In a lawsuit brought by ICP and the American Civil Liberties Union of Michigan, Juggalos claimed the classification infringed on their First Amendment right to express themselves.

For more, watch my March 2014 story, Juggalos vs. the FBI: Why the Fans of Insane Clown Posse are Not a Gang. Here's the original text for that story:

You may already know Juggalos, the fans of Detroit horrorcore rap group Insane Clown Posse (ICP), from Buzzfeed lists, television shows like Workaholics, or music videos like "Juggalo Island." But, you may not know that Juggalos are one of the best examples of a self-reliant (but demonized) community. 

Juggalos began to garner a lot of mainstream attention in 2011 when they were classified as a "hybrid gang" by the FBI in their National Gang Threat Assessment report. The report says Juggalos could "exhibit gang-like behavior and engage in criminal activity and violence."

Juggalos at the 2013 Gathering of the Juggalos, a music festival held in Cave-in-Rock, Illinois, told Reason TV that they disputed the claims made by the FBI.

"That's stereotyping pretty much," said one Juggalo. "You know people who don't listen to the music or are not a fan or a family are going to think we are violent people when they see hatchet men [emblem of Juggalos] or Juggalo stuff."

Insane Clown Posse's members, Shaggy 2 Dope and Violent J, agree and are suing the FBI along with the American Civil Liberties Union of Michigan, claiming that profiling Juggalos as a gang violates Juggalos' constitutional right to express themselves. Further, the gang classification could subject Juggalos to routine stops, detainment, and interrogation by local and federal law enforcement based solely on their music preferences. 

"I think it's ridiculous to consider the Juggalos a gang," says journalist Camille Dodero, who has written about Juggalos and Insane Clown Posse for Gawker and the Village Voice. "In some ways it's almost ironic. These are a group of people that no one else in America has ever cared about and then this one band gave them a sense of identity–like it was a support group."

Dodero says Juggalos often come from lower class backgrounds and although some of them commit crimes, not all of them do.

"And that's not to say that there are that many kids doing it. It just so happened that somebody caught onto the fact that those kids who have that hatchet man sometimes steal things," says Dodero. "That is part of who ICP has been reaching though, people with really bad upbringings."

ICP, who grew up in lower-class households just like their fans, have targeted victims as their audience. These include kids who were homeless, came from an abusive family, or were molested. The result is a world where these young people have escaped the life they were dealt for a supportive community they've helped create. One they lovingly refer to as "family."

The FBI said it could not comment on pending litigation, but the effects of the gang label may have already impacted the next Gathering of the Juggalos. The 2014 music festival had to change locations multiple times thanks in part to the fears of local residents, fears Insane Clown Posse has said are associated with the gang classification.

For a behind the scenes look at the filming of this documentary short check out Reason TV's Instagram account:

http://instagram.com/p/lLWkEoRxu9/

http://instagram.com/p/lLTahgRxqg/

http://instagram.com/p/dscKKzRxn8/

Approximately 7:56.

Written and produced by Paul Detrick. Field produced by Alex Manning and Detrick. Additional camera by Jim Epstein.

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  1. I like how the FBI claims they cannot comment on pending litigation. Yet somehow they always manage to have plenty of comments about people they are investigating, and ongoing prosecutions when it suits their interests.

    1. +1 Atlanta bomber

  2. The Juggalos should stop triggering those with Coulorophobia.

    1. *Coulrophobia*

      1. Coprophagia?

  3. They probably need a union.. and, maybe they could collectively embrace islam and start writing articles for slate.. either way, they would never hear from the federal bureau of intimidation again..

    1. Become a Democrat Superpac?

      1. That’s implied with “union”, but.. if they requested asylum status from persecution from our government, and went on to become an army of effective democrat bundlers, their success story would be trumpeted from the highest rooftops of national media forum.. Hmm.. bundle for shillary?, or Bernie?… what to do, what to do.. Ahh.. declare “juggalo” a race and a gender! Problem solved!

      2. A Democrat Superpac is power without boundaries.

  4. You Know Which Other Organization founded by a Bonaparte harassed perceived enemies of the state?

  5. These are a group of people that no one else in America has ever cared about and then this one band gave them a sense of identity?like it was a support group.

    Next up: shaking down bronies.

  6. Je Sui ICP

    1. +1

      We are all juggalos now.

      1. Woop woop!

        1. Break out the Faygo!

  7. “…exhibit gang-like behavior and engage in criminal activity and violence.”

    So, no different than most local police.

    1. Unlike bikers, they seem to know enough to steer clear of the Twin Peaks restaurant parking lot when the police are there..

      “Bikers: the *new* pit-bulls”

  8. Only song I kind of liked was the dating game one.

    1. That album (The Great Milenko) is the only one I’m really familiar with, but it has plenty of funny songs on it. What Is a Juggalo? is another classic.

      1. Yeah…if I remember right, that one wasn’t bad, either.

  9. “Let’s meet contestant number one; He’s a skitsofrantic, serial killer clown…” Who says he has a pen, a phone and the legal privilege of assassinating Americans whenever he pleases!

  10. My dad’s side of the family still all lives in Cave In Rock. He’s buried in the cemetery there, which is larger than the town. The ferry across the Ohio River runs to Kentucky there.

    If you had any idea what a sleepy little town that is, and how conservative Christian most of the folks are, you’d get just how big a joke it is that the Gathering of the Juggalos is held there. I grew up across the river in Kentucky, but would visit family there frequently. When I was back for my father’s funeral last year, I asked them about it. They just shrugged and said nobody goes outside for a week while it’s going on, but other than that, the kids don’t cause any problems, so the money is welcome.

    1. Huh, I just finished the video & didn’t know the thing had moved. Nobody in my family mentioned that the festival was moving when I asked them about it (Feb. 2014). Suspicious. I wonder if my family helped run them off (if it was “local residents” I’m sure my family was involved, because there…well, there’s not a lot of people there who aren’t related to eachother).

      1. It was probably due to the incident where their fans threw glass bottles at Tila Tequila as she tried to sing a song and she was threatening lawsuits. The town could have been sued for not enforcing glass bottle laws, which most events prohibit.

        1. their fans threw glass bottles at Tila Tequila as she tried to sing a song

          And that’s a bad thing?

    2. “They just shrugged and said nobody goes outside for a week while it’s going on, but other than that, the kids don’t cause any problems, “

      So what you’re saying is, its like Puerto Rican Pride Day in NYC, only less violence and trash?

    3. That’s pretty much how Butler County, PA views Pennsic (annual SCA event of 12,000 medievalists).

      1. “medievalists”

        That seems like a long word for “dork

        I can imagine the purists… “I haven’t bathed since last year! Just wanted to really experience the *realism* this time. Plus, I have malnutrition!”

  11. Fucking gangs – how do they work?

    1. Ever watched A Clockwork Orange?

      1. I don’t recall seeing any Juggalos in that, my Droogie

        1. No. But it did have “fucking gangs” doing a little of the old in-n-out.

  12. I only know two things about ICP, hearing their hilariously tasteless guest spots on the radio version of Loveline in the late 90s, and some documentary about the Gathering of the Juggalos festival that’s basically a much sadder version of Heavy Metal Parking Lot. Which makes me think all of those 80s metal bands must be bummed that they couldn’t get the street cred of having their poor nogoodnik fans certified as a gang by the FBI. Somewhere, the members of Slayer are saying “our fans killed people, too!”

  13. The report said Juggalos could “exhibit gang-like behavior and engage in criminal activity and violence.”

    Emphasis added. With all due respect, practically *anyone* could … exhibit … oh. OHHH!!

    /Edith Bunker

  14. The thing is, with the record the government has of turning various groups into bogeymen “gangs”, why should we believe them abkut ANYBODY? The Hells Angels? The Crips and Bloods? I mean, when a government report reads like a second rate Steven Seagal direct-to-video extraveganza, why does anyone believe it?

  15. The Machinery of Freedom is greased with Faygo: Juggalos have a judicial system.

    1. You Know Who Else had their own judicial system?

      1. Yeah, but did they have a “wheel of bone”, topless women, and volunteer paint ball firing squads? Hitler was never that cool.

        1. “Hitler was never that cool.”

          Hey, come on now. You hardly know the guy.

          1. Top binge watching Danger 5, G.

            1. *Stop*. I type bad.

              1. Never seen a single episode. I plan to watch them all at once at some point.

                1. Don’t bother. It’s not that good.

                  1. YOU LIE

                    1. Season 1: tries to be a Venture Brothers’ flashback.
                      Season 2: was already done to perfection by Kung Fury.

                      Danger 5 isn’t that good.

                    2. Season one is well-worth your time. Season two could be, but it is pretty out there.

                    3. Kung Fury is Season Two of Danger 5 in 30 minutes.

                      I don’t care who Hitler takes to the prom!

                    4. I’m strangely disappointed. I expected great things.

                    5. So did I

      2. Most colleges and universities?

  16. OT – After the murder of Army people at recruiting centers, the Army has made a bold decision – armed civilians defending these recruiting centers are security risks.

    http://www.myfoxdc.com/story/2…..ng-centers

    1. This is the weirdest interpretation of the 2nd Amendment ever: We need an armed populace to protect the well regulated-militia from random jihadis attacks.

    2. Nothing unexpected about this.

      The military made it clear *decades* ago that servicemembers are all expendable on the alter of PR.

      That’s why we were disarmed in the first place, why you’ll never see any of the branches allow recruiters (or anyone else) to carry on their own, and why the services see these guys as a ‘security risk’.

      They’re a risk because they might rough up someone who isn’t *immediately and obviously to the media* a threat. They might say something unpolitic. Hell, nightmare of nightmare, they might *shoot* an attacker.

      Then the Army looks bad. And that’s sin number one, an ‘eternal sin’ for which no forgiveness is possible.

  17. ICP hated the Confederate flag years before it became such a trendy cause.

    Your Rebel Flag (NSFW lyrics, as usual)

    1. The original version was by John Greenleaf Whittier.

    2. GWAR most likely created an equilibrium ( or would have, had only they foreseen such a trendy cause ).

  18. That’s why they’re a *hybrid* gang, DUH!

  19. So how do we make the ICP Family a reliable Libertarian vote?

    1. Order them all a drink “and stir it with my dick”?

      1. Woop woop!

        No, but seriously.

        1. So acting out ICP lyrics won’t work….

    2. You sound like you have done image building campaigns for the Libertarian party before. I suppose the Juggalos would be better for the LP’s image than Bob Barr at least.

  20. It’s not a ‘stupid’ attack Detrick. It’s a fucking calculated attack on absurdist artistry. Nothing more. The Juggalos are retarded Christian homophobic fuck jackoffs and I’ve enjoyed them more than I care to admit but going after the Juggalos is a laser attack on oddity and fringe and the motherfucking goddamn FBI should know better and the FUCKS running that place have scrotums that were cut off by baby bees and then melted down into rock candy gravel and then this strange FBI melted down scrotum rock candy gravel was further ground down into the pinkest pair of panties ever invented on the earth we watch clouds on and the pinkest pair of panties were made into a burrito for the FBI’s tiniest ground down balls and not a single fucking human being on earth wanted nothing to do with this insipid weakness… though, gravity enjoyed smashing this smallness of power into further millions of fragments off a cliff I through them.

    No one likes the fucking DEA or CIA- hateful horrible businesses that. But, the FBI… we like to believe those motherfuckers aren’t fucking with our pop culture artists no matter how fucked up and strange they are FBI. Fuck off, FBI. Jesus fucking christ.

    The Juggaloes are more Christians and USA than your shitty ball sacks are evidently.

    Christ. fuck this nation up that ass. Even the federal bureaus have lost their motherfucking way.

    time for a revival of freedom and liberty at the shark’s mouth called America.

    1. Good evening, A.C..

    2. The Juggalos are retarded Christian homophobic

      I don’t know anything about the Juggalos so I’ll assume this A.C. being A.C.?

      1. Nope.

        They’re Christian, kinda retarded and quite homophobic.

        You gotta dig a bit, like scientology, before you get to the christee nougat under the topless chick.

  21. “”Isn’t it nice to have a little guidance about how to be considerate and polite?” – memo to professors on how to deal with students’ sexual identity

    For example, “One suggestion is to ask “students to write down preferred names and pronouns” on the first day while also keeping in mind that just because a student wanted a particular pronoun on the first day doesn’t mean that he/she/they/zi/zie will always want that pronoun because “a person’s gender identity may change over time.””

    During a single academic year!

    For instance, one day the student insists he’s a robot, the next day he’s a dinosaur…basically, just deal with your university students the way you’d deal with your 4-year old.

    http://www.nationalreview.com/…..rine-timpf

    1. If you are not sure what name or pronoun someone uses, ask!

      And face a gender-discrimination lawsuit?! Zim think not!

    2. *shrugs*

      I’d call a student “Mxyzptlk” if that’s what they wanted.

      No skin off my teeth.

  22. Nations get lost and if this earth got lost on orbit we’d all die, man.

  23. Feelings are invisible mountains and valleys on the rainbow flats.

    1. Watch out for your good eye!

  24. The Juggalo culture in its entirety would be killed by our allies in the middle east. Ever seen a goth muslim? prob not, be killed tomorrow. Fucking not sure what Greenwald sees about that nasty horribly shitty fucked up shrill business.

    1. ” Ever seen a goth muslim?”

      For all you know there’s tons of ’em under them burkahs

      1. “For all you know there’s tons of ’em under them burkahs”

        Probably thongs too.

    2. Faygo Alleppo rhymes but alienates the upper classes from the cause.

      1. Richy baby found 4 goths in a billion muslims. I say this nigga found goth diamonds in literal religious dankmost.

        1. So? Would?

  25. Asking gay activists to provide anti-bullying education is like asking foxes to teach henhouse safety.

    “At Anti-Bullying Conference, Middle Schoolers Learn About Lesbian Strap-On Anal Sex, Fake Testicles”

    http://dailycaller.com/2015/07…..testicles/

    1. i wouldn’t want anyone teaching “anti-bullying” in school

      unless its jiu jitsu/krav maga. that i’m cool with. an elective.

      But I don’t think its the Queer Power people you need to be concerned with. Its the idiots who hired them to do this middle-school awareness raising exercise.

      Well, then again, maybe not

      “Humboldt, Iowa school district superintendent Greg Darling said the funding for students in the district to attend the conference was provided by a student-run organization

      He said he could do nothing to prevent the club which sponsored attendance at the event from fundraising for it next year or sending local students.”

      It was an event specifically for ‘gay/lesbian’ teens. all the attendance seems voluntary, and it was paid for with student-group fundraising.

      You might object to the content (or parents certainly might), but i don’t think you can object to it merely for *existing*

      1. “(or parents certainly might)”

        You might relegate this to parentheses, but I regard it as a fairly key point.

        1. Well i think if you personally object, then don’t let your own gay children attend.

          But, as with many things, its none of your business if other parents do let their gay kids go to these sorts of things, regardless of their dubious utility or propriety. The “Community” might be appalled that some of their students are gay and like to have gay-stuff presented for them, but its none of the community’s business either if they aren’t paying for it. as noted

    2. The very rarely, but, possibly once bullied have become without question among the worst of bullies.

    3. You have a point but let’s not fucking get to fucking surreal here, sweeted heart GKC counsellor…
      I watched a little blonde gay fuck in the late 80’s get destroyed by the 2 whites and 80 blacks in an inner city school to the point I as forced Christian youngster pulled him aside in the locker room and begged his ass to leave my school simply because I like the kid and didn’t want him savaged any longer. He left the next week.

      1. So here’s my concern…a guy is tormented for his sexuality…but instead of fighting back against the *specific people* who persecuted him, he takes out his anger out on society in general.

        Believe it or not, if I was on a jury and some gay guy was prosecuted for smacking the living shit out of some bully, I would probably acquit.

        Not so much if instead of striking back at his persecutor he tries to make all of society pay for what other people did.

        1. I would suggest that the problem here is not “gay activists” but “radical progressives”.

          I was peripherally involved with an LGBT (OK, there were fewer letters back then) group in Buffalo that did a lot of good for high-school age kids simply by having get-togethers & fun activities and such. There was no instruction in strap-ons. I might add that this group was not in any way connected to schools. In that regard I am very old school – I would remove anything not related to actual education from school. No clubs, no anal sex education, etc.

        2. Yea, but you aren’t talking ’bout society, baby. Your vector is government schools.

      2. Gays get fucking bullied man. Alongside a lot of weak and odd kids. Mainstream culture beneath a few years has few tolerances for the fringes which is unfortunate. My super Christian sisters were bullied way were than the fucking very few gays. Horribly bullied. But the nice thing is I kicked the ass of an Escobar in junior high which probably means nothing to anyone below 35. But kicking the ass of an Escobar in toledo, ohio meant that I earned a certain cred. Escobar beatings did not come lightly in the 80’s. And for that I appreciate the Escobars.

        1. I rolled into high school on serious street cred and I have a single beating of an Escobar to thank for that. Peace out, Escobars. took me all the way until graduation. We were pentecostal cultists in deep nasty changing hood territories in late 80’s Toledo when Mexicans from down below were establishing culture amide a changing gang culture formed from crips and bloods. But one day down the street we went and this nasty ass nigger I always hated was chucking shit across the street at my littlest sister for wearing a motherfucking calico dress on the streets. Being all modest and shit drew the attention of the gang niggers who liked to dominate the women with their fucking punkass cred.. man, I didn’t give a shit about your black. don’t fuck with my sister who is forced by her alpha male pentecostal father to wear motherfucking shit, bitch…. he didn’t shut when I asked him politely too… so I slapped that motherfucker in the face so hard his ass slammed down and he blinked and teared uped and we went home in peace.

  26. Fuck this 1500 column length man,,, bitches get on here and roll some keys and this fucking place needs to give us at least fucking 2k length, man. what the fuck is this arbitrary bullshit, Reason. I love you motherfuckers but what the fuck

  27. Also: the chick on the far right of the screen shot? Would.

    1. If you would’ve Q’d that festival your Q fucking ass would’ve seen her get off on some great shit, bro. I won’t pretend to not be there.

  28. OT: Friend of mine sends me this quote. Makes my head spin off its axis and gets me near violent at its immoral position. My friend thinks that since I lost my cool (suppose I shouldn’t have), it means I lost the debate.

    “We should do away with the absolutely specious notion that everybody has to earn a living. It is a fact today that one in ten thousand of us can make a technological breakthrough capable of supporting all the rest. The youth of today are absolutely right in recognizing this nonsense of earning a living. We keep inventing jobs because of this false idea that everybody has to be employed at some kind of drudgery because, according to Malthusian Darwinian theory he must justify his right to exist. So we have inspectors of inspectors and people making instruments for inspectors to inspect inspectors. The true business of people should be to go back to school and think about whatever it was they were thinking about before somebody came along and told them they had to earn a living.”

    ? R. Buckminster Fuller

    1. straffbaby needs to go a sliver of anarcho-cap.

      I really don’t have a problem with bright minds sending a fucking cock block to corporate kingdoms, baby. I just wish these same corp-blocking brights would look at the USA as the same cock block opp.

    2. Why should earning a living be based on ANY modern or pre-modern model? Straff, why CAN’T modern kids earn and carve out cash in supra creative ways?, bro?

      1. Eat, starve, work, loll around. I don’t give a fuck. I volunteer year round helping mentally disabled kids and have zero patience for able-bodied assholes claiming they have a right to the fruit of someone else’s hard work.

        1. What? You are insanely fucked up and awesome, babyrainbowStraff.

          BUT, being awesome and fucking svelte doesn’t mean you don’t get off being critiqued for refusing to think outside the box, mr awesome.

          Your brilliant and fucking pyramid level work shouldn’t equate to your world rejecting alternative routes to creative attraction paths to big bucks, baby.

      2. Produce value or be a parasite upon it.

        1. value is objective, love q.

          1. Bullshit, Cy. Something I throw in a dumpster is something somebody else is eager to pull out of it. If value was objective, it have never gone in, nor never have been pulled out,

          2. “value is objective, love q.”

            Nope.
            If it were, there would be a “true” market value for a good, and socialism would function.
            We can agree that food has a value, but not how much value for a specific food at specific times and places.

    3. Why IS capitalism so limited? Why IS capitalism so narrow and often based on strength down and take downs? Why can’t capitalism adapt to fluid places and fluid flows of returns?

      Capitalism should be the most adaptable and peaceful concern. Communistic endeavors cannot define the capitalistic threads that wind into the socialistic fabrics.

      What do we have here? PURE capitalism? Nah, never…. your capitalistic endeavor has to be approved by? your local little city? yes….
      Fact is. I knew a dude in Piqua, Ohio who committed suicide right next to I-75 because the local commission drove him nuts. Thanks, Piqua, Ohio. You rock all you wonderfuck bureacrats.

    4. It’s not immoral, it’s just incredibly stupid.

      1. You’re right, technically. If we accept what he’s saying as true, the prescription many would advocate would be immoral. You’re right, though.

    5. “according to Malthusian Darwinian theory”

      WHAT DOES THIS MEAN

      1. That humanity is in a perpetual state of competition (Darwinian) for a mythical, finite set of resources (Mathusian)?

        You got me, that was just a stab at it.

      2. Quick Google turns up nothing. Malthusian/Darwinian? Or just throw out a couple references and hope they make sense. Sad part is Fuller was amazing in other aspects, just not this.

        1. I’m still trying to come up with some justification for Geodesic Domes. What do they *do* again? Or is it just the novelty of ‘structural efficiency’ with zero actual utility?

          footnote: I knew a DJ named Funkminster Fuller

          1. They get people to vacation in Florida?

            1. Epcot was lame. I grew up going to Busch Gardens (Williamsburg VA) and Action Park (NJ), and those places were proper fucking theme parks.

              Even at 10yrs old, Epcot seemed like a gaudy strip mall. Busch Gardens has medieval and renaissance Europe motif. It was historical(ish) in a way a kid could grasp and find compelling.

              Epcot was just a clusterfuck attempt at “a Small World After All”, but in practice it was like the Food Court at your local mall. They had tacos and egg rolls. Whoo hoo, international expo!!

              My question re: the dome actually stems from my visit there. I asked my dad, “what’s the point of that”. He was like, “Its an engineering thing” “But does it DO anything”, “shut up and eat your taco”

              1. I grew up going to Freedomland. Actually could see their fireworks from my house.

          2. The use them for psycho-isolation chambers…

          3. The intent was to provide domiciles with minimal surface area to avoid wasting heat. The problem is only slugs can live in them.

      3. I was curious about that also, and does anyone know if this might be apocryphal? Bunky could get very weird at times, but not all of the wierdness attributed to him is true.

        1. He’s referring to the mistaken notion that we are in a perpetual state of competition (Darwinian) for a mythical, finite set of resources (Mathusian} as Gilmore said.

          He thinks that it is this notion that forces us into thinking that work is a reward unto itself–when ‘work’ is actually the process whereby we get those things we need to continue existing.

          The less time we have to work, the more time we have to do things that matter to us.

    6. And why should the one in ten thousand make technological breakthroughs if they could just sit around doing nothing instead?

      1. ()@#*$(@ @#()$*@# )(*@#$(@

        next time, irish, i will be faster.

        1. Gil stars emblems laid into a super stream of stars and gintrinkits and so My Mr Gilmoriangasmo bitch powered his motherfucking comp on the G andL and bitch is sycotic and brangin a bingin a pile of FUCKING tones, .little MR GIL STarsquid… so we dove for parachites and fucking swangs and crambs…. a

          I love my seababy, on the yacht of bikinies…

    7. “one in ten thousand of us can make a technological breakthrough capable of supporting all the rest.”

      A simple retort to old bucky =

      “and why would that 1 ever have bothered getting out of bed if he was already sponging off of someone else’s Great Idea?”

      Incentives. How do they work?

      1. IT TAKES A VILLAGE, god damn it.

      2. Gil is swinging on seas …
        dammit….
        if little Gil was a butt-naked soldier and little Gil was buried deep in Liberia with his little child soldiers hanging with cocaine and gunpowder parties tranging to Murican rap stars…. Little Gilmore would rolled out like another fucking day and chopped the arms of that nun in the village.
        and the boy, chop his legs off, and that scared mama chop one leg off, oh, man look at that little girl… chop her arms off. her brother. chop his hands off….. oh

        get the idea?

      3. Some people will produce because they like it. (Insert illogical reasoning steps 2~5 here). Therefore, people have the right to not work and pursue that which interests them.

    8. “We should do away with the absolutely specious notion that everybody has to earn a living. It is a fact today that one in ten thousand of us can make a technological breakthrough capable of supporting all the rest. ”

      Of course, the same people who would agree with this want to ban inheritances. They love the idea of charity, as long as the people donating don’t get to decide who receives it.

      1. At least Bucky Fuller didn’t believe that part.

  29. Can pure capitalism exist in America?

  30. Where have any of us made money based on PURE capitalism anywhere in AMerica?

    1. garage sales?

      1. lap83 dances also…
        and financials.

        you can make money on financials, bros and lil lap.

      2. fun fact: I once put on a yard sale with some neighbors and ended up in some German tourist’s photos when they happened by. I felt like an animal in a zoo because I could hear them talking, but they didn’t talk to me, they just wanted some photographic evidence of the weird American girl with her junk all out on the lawn.

    2. I’m on my second startup now, and neither the first nor this one relied on any sort of governmental support.
      In both cases, the businesses were/are legal; permits and licenses. Other than that, both simply offer goods to customers which (in both cases) they bought in amounts which retired the capital pretty quickly.

  31. I demand my Reason luminaries to show they have made rainbows of cash purely so sweetly cash-wise in this open America and its thousands of lovely cash loving cities.

    um-

  32. Not a single city in America has not a litany of codes for us to get rich… and the state is kind of sorta worse, and the feds? fucked up…

    yea,… getting rich in this shit can happen- I have money. I’ve done it. But it is NOT easy.

  33. Is facebook really worth that dumbass being so rich?

    1. Divide his net worth by the billionish users, it seems kinda cheap.

      1. cheap, yea… that is why I make money on cheap shit.

        1. Trophy wives having parties. Meal ticket.

          1. Q is a trapdoor to the big bang where the little genius in the wheel chair is figuring this lights out, Q… Open you body, Q. The Harvards and galaxy yards are planting gardens in your Q lines.

  34. I’m sorry but billions of people are retarded but I guess millions are made with retarded fucks.

  35. Facebook PROVES you can get rich on dumbasses

  36. Man, anyone who thinks that fuck who runs facebook is smart enough to create code for facebook is on facebook….

    Facebook the most amazing snakeoil since the greeks.

  37. Mises in a letter to Ayn Rand.

    “You have the courage to tell the masses what no politician told
    them: you are inferior and all the improvements in your conditions
    which you simply take for granted you owe to the effort of men who
    are better than you.”

    1. Straff, you and I can love Ayn, baby. We can suck Ayn’s titties and lick her asshole while we tied her powerful galaxy queen arms to the irons, Straff. Agile and Straff can fuck Ayn and enjoy her galaxy tits and deep space vagina, baby.

  38. all things are wrapping around my favorite oaks
    but the words of loves in this world are big hearts
    filled with breaks and lovely deeps but if you peel
    back a deep poster they have long lost junkies living in the
    arms of their fingers…
    I don’t know why my fingers are post lines this quick
    but my ribbons have wrapped on the lone tunes of dead quitars.
    under the dim cents of a hobo looking at me while she was
    drunk off my ten, but I was honest and she wanted a hug
    cuz 10 can buy a fucking escape from the lines.

  39. I lied down under the alter when the pastor screamed
    and the deacons walked after the midnight hour and
    I lied there under the christ clouds looking for my lover
    and hoped she’d kneel near me while I gave my mind to that
    imagined arm hop.

    she knelt away but christ and his paradises screamed into
    my eyebrows and hands and my cheap jeans tortured the carpet
    as I watched my certain love and her fucking awesome ass
    bent over in front of the alter and the evangelists screamed
    and called and I looked and cheated on my mind and my dick
    got hard at jesus’s altar while I was a boy…

    a girl of so much liquid feminine glory and denim skirt and jesus power
    under the pall of the altar and her tits bounced as she worshipped
    the lord and her waist was produced planets and her pentecostal ass
    strummed a billion angle harps and her ankles I would kiss for
    eternity and Jesus christ opened the altars of the meetings
    and felled all of us young but I felt the prowess of revivals and I felled
    under the altars of sexual power….

    and the peaceful rivers of the future echoed for decades….

  40. yeah. so I whored after innocent christian girls at the altar calls,

    fuck you for judging me, you fucking shits.

    same age.. I wasnt the FUCKING preacher and yea I FUCKING lusted after years of watching tepid, uptight, fucking puritan females bending over at the altars since I was 5. But, you learn in the old black. white, Pentecostal, baptist altars that your young females mates have awesome asses bent at altars searching and crying for jesus and his disciple on these threads John.

    what you don’t know about John our boy is he is legit and he plays with legit altar call girls… no under-age crap here…. just college girls. Big town, evangelical world shit in the massive horns and altars where all the evangelical crowds gather and I saw John sidle up to like 10 jesus searching blondes and he bent down and prayed with these collegiate altar-calling blondes and perhaps a brunette or two and Reason John recommended that their Christ education should continue back at his cabin and I noticed John, the anti-gay guy but pro= multiple blonde girl Jesus education guy…. walk by me with a very structured cock in his jesus drawers.

    Oh man, John is going to be SO pissed at me.. hehahhhaha

  41. goddAMN i LOVE by arms and legs
    and I want to be a rainbow
    and when stars hit my face I eat frogs
    things on wheels run me and I love wings
    underneath cells when atoms are fat on greek tacos
    and lights split into a zion where a ton of siamese cats
    sleep on my light fingers and my face blurs
    a break under the dictionary of tunes
    and the coffins of a million people merge
    under the down cleft dank swank and that
    scrank brunk is leading my penis into a million
    star plant vagini and a mess of tongues clant and clit
    on the temporal shields wavering under swarv donkl
    and underweeze….

    1. Agile Cyborg should be hired to write articles for Reason.

      1. Replace Sheldon with cyborg. Also, replace shikha with visual artist to illustrate his posts

        Or wait, he can do that. One stop shop

      2. Replace Sheldon with cyborg. Also, replace shikha with visual artist to illustrate his posts

        Or wait, he can do that. One stop shop

  42. I miss the old days, when the FBI investigated cool stuff like crimes committed by mutants who could squeeze through small openings, ufo sightings, and alien abductions.

    They lose a couple of good agents and they’re reduced to harassing music fans.

    1. Were those the agents abducted by those aliens?

  43. My hearts ate ripples
    and i die everday
    under the moans of moons
    when muscles clang
    and arms cling
    and hearts pretend to be alive
    and I watch with my elbow eyes
    a billionth of a second a thousand tarantualas eat their meat and
    wasps kill them and my eye seconds recognize that
    lightning hits my heart and see a trillion
    mirrors reflecting a billion wants and loves
    and so effervescent reflective lasers
    twine the threads of hallways
    none of us have gathered
    unto us and the tall pillars of the lonely
    stars clack and clank a
    softness like a galactic vagina so
    furrowed, lined, and pulsating and pink
    and so fucking deep and lusch…
    lush and a bridge into her amazing fucking genius
    soldiers, assasins, samauri, cia, fbi, (the dea fucks frogs and deserves NOTHING in my poems)……lovers sliding into the agenda bridges of shapespeares……

    organs loft and orgasms fly and lights swift and bang arounda and arang….

  44. I drew a pencil on a bell and when its ring hit my arms
    I drew a naked angel and she had a massive cock and
    tiny tits…. man this really happens whenyour fucked up…

    angels can have cocks and vaginas and rainbows unlike
    humans and humans don’t have bells also spilling from
    their limbs like an ocean of cocaine and boose, either.

  45. a single arm punched through a cloud and I grabbed the cloud and
    expected jesus but got a chest of lightning and when I died for
    a few minutes my toes gras[ed the bottom of a cliff no one discovered
    because when you are bout to die…. earth landscapes are gone and new landscapes are
    uncovered?

    what the FUCK?

    1. the new beyond under the imagined.
      if the universes are layered and complex arrangements of perceptions
      landscapes we see now and here can be rotated with landscaped futures which
      echo star times…. beyond and now, but not out there but here…. here and beyond and in between
      the star pulses and calls

  46. my heart loves my reason alians.
    my love extends to reason scribes.
    my peace to my reason thread lords
    I am going to travel my loves

    I am going to the mind galaxy where the universe sounds
    its gardens and i am gone, bros… going to the universe gardan.

    1. Bon voyage, spacer cowboy.

  47. Google pay 97$ per hour my last pay check was $8500 working 1o hours a week online. My younger brother friend has been averaging 12k for months now and he works about 22 hours a week. I cant believe how easy it was once I tried it out.
    This is wha- I do…… ?????? http://www.online-jobs9.com

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