Beyond Dead Malls: Dead Jails

What can a county do with an empty downtown jail?

What happens when you cross the incarceration boom with the white-elephant projects that so many city and county governments love? Scott Henson sums up the situation in one Texas town:

McLennan County

Entrepreneurial jail building has left Waco with an empty jail downtown and no revenue stream to pay for the bonds issued to build an unnecessary extra facility. Faulty projections of increased immigration detention have left McLennan County and others seeking to rent out extra beds in the lurch.

By entrepreneurial jail building, Henson means local jurisdictions erecting extra jail space with plans to profit by taking in prisoners from other arms of the government. You know how some towns think the ticket to prosperity is to spend their taxes on a convention center? This is like that, except the conventioneers can't leave.

Waco's woes involve a facility that's been closed since 2010 but still costs the county a lot of money in upkeep. The Waco Tribune has more details here.

Comments

[Almanian!]

Empty jails?

"NEVER HEARD OF 'EM."

/Red Dawn

[SugarFree]

50 Shades of Grey brand sex dungeons.

[Almanian!]

You know, I really do appreciate that we can ALWAYS count on you to come through SF.

Always.

[Hugh Akston]

For future reference Alm, SugarFree's asshole is a little slack, so I recommend a thin coat of petroleum jelly on your lips to ensure a tight seal.

[SugarFree]

Hugh, your momma's so fat you were subjected to a long series of jokes about in grade school.

[Episiarch]

You know it's a real shame you can't type, your insults might be effective if you could. Besides, Hugh's mom isn't fat, she's just a complete whore.

[Hugh Akston]

That's what I get for going to school with Chris Rock.

[The Late P Brooks]

Give it to the school system.

[Pro Libertate]

Look, thanks to abandoned malls, we have one of the greatest car-chase scenes of all time.

[Charles Easterly]

Fix the cigarette lighter....

[Almanian!]

Paul Blart:Mall Cop wasn't THAT good.

[Pro Libertate]

[The Penguin smacks Almanian! with her ruler.]

[Almanian!]

"It's got a cop engine, cop tires, cop suspension..."

[Pro Libertate]

"It's a model made before catalytic converters so it'll run good on regular gas."

[Episiarch]

Use of unnecessary violence in apprehension of the Blues Brothers...has been approved.

[Almanian!]

Weren't the Skokie Nazis in a Pinto? Best use of a Pinto. EVAR.

[Riven]

I hate those Illinois Nazis...

[Notorious G.K.C.]

"It's 106 miles to Chicago, we got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark... and we're wearing sunglasses."

"Hit it."

[Loki]

"Your women. I want to buy your women. The little girl, your daughters... sell them to me. Sell me your children!"

[Pro Libertate]

The best musical ever.

[Robert]

Thanks to malls in those days not having all-nighters like Black Fri. during Xmas shopping season, we have great zombie footage. I didn't see the movie until decades later, whereupon I said, that place is familiar! I hadn't been there since the era in which it was made.

[Spencer]

Seems like we have an issue with governments participating in the markets where they don't belong...

[Jordan]

But, according to Keynesians, building useless jails ought to turn Waco into a boomtown.

[Almanian!]

Multiplier Effect. Is there anything it CAN'T do?

[Spencer]

I'm sure they can imprison a significant portion of the people who built the jail itself... I mean, if they really wanted to.

[Scarecrow Repair]

It divides the political populace, subtracts from our wallets, adds to our misery, leads to exponential growth in government, and is the root of all evil that is government.

Not to get off on a tangent or anything, but it's cos the Fuck You That's Why clause is a sin against nature.

[Beautiful Bean Footage]

ISWYDT

[Hugh Akston]

No no, that only works if the jail has broken windows. Or if aliens invade.

[Loki]

Maybe they could sell it to a cult, then the BATFE and the FBI can move in, surround them for a month or two, and eventually burn the whole place down with the cultists inside. How much economic impact would that have?

[Scarecrow Repair]

Depends on whether they insure it first.

[Swamp Think]

+1 full employment confinement!

[The Late P Brooks]

But, according to Keynesians, building useless jails ought to turn Waco into a boomtown.

There must be a Texas Air National Guard unit in need of target practice.

[Episiarch]

1. Build more cages for nonviolent people
2. ???????
3. PROFIT

[sarcasmic]

2. House federal prisoners for a hefty price (it's federal money so it's free), hire all kinds of guards and other support staff.

[SugarFree]

Jezebellian talks about having oral sex with her dad:

"How long have you wanted this to happen?" I asked. I didn't really want to know the answer.

"From the first moment I saw you," he told me.

[Riven]

... Weird.

[Old Man With Candy]

Try this one on for size, Riven.

[SugarFree]

Her prose is atrocious. I'm sure everyone in writing class was appropriately shocked.

[Old Man With Candy]

She could use some tutoring from you, The Master.

[SugarFree]

Well, for one:

In literature and rhetorical studies, the mimetic fallacy is a work's (possibly unsuccessful) attempt to convey an emotional state or idea by writing in a manner that corresponds to that state. For example, a writer using confusing and foggy terms to express or describe a besotted character's chaotic thoughts is falling prey to the mimetic fallacy. This is not necessarily a bad thing; however, relying on the mimetic fallacy too much can lead to careless writing and a finished product that is incomprehensible to the reader.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Oooooooh...kay.

After this, I officially prefer Sugarfree's fiction to Jezebel articles.

[Episiarch]

Yeah, that's not contradicting the stereotype that all Jezebel writers (and most of their commenters) are all fucked up about sex.

My biological father wanted to have sex with me from the first moment he laid eyes on me.

Uh huh. That's normal.

[HeteroPatriarch]

Fittingly posted by SugarFree.

[Loki]

"From the first moment I saw you," he told me.

What, like in the hospital nursery!? What the fuck is wrong with some people? Can someone just beat this fucker to death with a baseball bat please?

[Raven Nation]

It's not much better but, according to the story, she first met her father when she was 19.

[JW]

C'mon, that's just bad porn.

[Loki]

"My unlce Jimbo has a ton of those movies in his dresser drawer."

[Suthenboy]

I am beginning to tire of having emotionally disturbed, mentally ill behavior held up and celebrated as if it is cool, edgy, bold, groundbreaking...whatever.

Its just fuckin' sick.

[Rhywun]

What a square.

[JW]

Their complete and total dysfunction must be celebrated!

[Beautiful Bean Footage]

I am beginning to tire of having emotionally disturbed, mentally ill behavior held up and celebrated as if it is cool, edgy, bold, groundbreaking...whatever.

Its just fuckin' sick.

PREACH

[Anonymous Coward]

I'm going to help you out, Splenda.

Incestuous Jezzie Nonsense

Don't give these demented harridans pageviews. It only encourages them.

[Lord Humungus]

Prison movie set? She-Wolf of the SS Part XXXI

[HeteroPatriarch]

So break the windows in it and replace them. Boom. Problem solved. It's like building a mint!

[HeteroPatriarch]

And I see I was too slow.

[sarcasmic]

Interestingly I caught my state's governor on the radio today talking about something somewhat related. Apparently in some of the more rural parts of the state, sheriffs have discovered that the feds pay more than the state to house prisoners. So these enterprising sheriffs are courting the federal government for more prisoners so they can then make a profit from housing them. The governor is not amused.

[sarcasmic]

A result of this is that as soon as a bed is free, the sheriffs fill it with a federal prisoner. Then when someone is arrested or convicted locally, there's no place to put them.

[Counterfly]

So they build more jails, problem solved.

[sarcasmic]

The governor says there's no need for more jails if the available beds aren't being used to profit from housing federal prisoners. Needless to say, sheriffs are fuming.

[Robert]

Well, yeah, the locals never want to be made to build low-income housing. Face it, the feds bring in a higher class of criminal, they're the ones you want to move in. Buy the cheaper crooks a ticket out of town, it'll pay in the long run.

[Pope Jimbo]

Sue Janet Reno for fucking up your business model. If she hadn't burned up the Branch Davidians, I'm sure their jail would be full.

[Caleb Turberville]

Most of the time, they turn buildings like this into makeshift office space for governmental workers.

I've seen an entire jail building converted into a city hall. You honestly could tell what it was in its past life.

[Caleb Turberville]

couldn't

[Dr. Fronkensteen]

Was the mayor's extension line 24601?

[Loki]

By entrepreneurial jail building, Henson means local jurisdictions erecting extra jail space with plans to profit by taking in prisoners from other arms of the government.

This kind of shit and "policing for profit" are two of the most insidious developments in our shitty little police state. Cops aren't interested in catching real criminals - they're dangerous people afterall - they're really just revenue collectors. Revenue collectors that can kill you with no consequences to them.

[Episiarch]

But the best part is that one of the first strawmen statists like to trot out is mockery of the concepts of private police agencies, fire departments, etc. They claim that it would put "profit ahead of justice". Yet here we see exactly that phenomenon, except it's happening in their desired monopolistic government police force. It amazing how they project everything. Just absolutely everything.

[JW]

But the best part is that one of the first strawmen statists like to trot out is mockery of the concepts of private police agencies, fire departments, etc. They claim that it would put "profit ahead of justice".

They'd kill you and sell your organs to the organ runners!

[Old Man With Candy]

Southpaw Jones- What About Waco?

Hilarious song.

[Rich]

Why not just get the FBI to burn it down?

[PRX]

anybody remember when government officials drove base model sedans like a Rambler without hubcaps?

[Pope Jimbo]

When my dad worked for the state of Minnesoda he went from a Plymouth Fury to a Chevette. He spent 4 years bitching about that.

[Swamp Think]

In the late 70s, the Sheriff's Office where I lived had some baby shit brown Chevettes with a single blue dome light that they used for serving papers and such. Hilarious.

[Loki]

All government vehicles should be required to be baby shit brown with chartreuse (puke green) interiors.

[Swamp Think]

In the same time period, USG had just bailed out Chrysler. Suddenly all the NASA staff cars at MSFC were white K-cars. My father had one. POS.

[robc]

OT:

Two Nashville police officers crashed their cars into each other on the ice. 12 other officers respond to the scene.

But I guess that guaranteed they went home safe.

[Loki]

12 other officers respond to the scene.

When they got to the scene they immediately formed a Polish firing squad, at which point a couple hundred shots were fired at the ice.

[JW]

I saw something similar last night. Cops had the bottom of an off-ramp partially blocked and were forcing drivers around their cars, straight into traffic. Nothing was there that I could see, other than cop cars. Meanwhile, about 6 or 7 cops cars go screaming past on their way to something Very Important.

Another cop must have stubbed his toe on something.

[R C Dean]

I'm gonna guess that somebody called in a loose dog.

[PamelaAPine]

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[Alan@.4]

Are the relevant county officials still suckling on/from the public tit?

[Robert]

Am I the only one here who remembers when Reason wrote favorably of prison privatiz'n?

[ErmaEPurnell]

Hey you guys I have found the perfect job as a full time student, it has changed my life around! If you are self motivated and social media savvy then this is ideal for you. The sky is the limit, you get exactly how much work you put into to it. Click on this link to get started and see for yourself..........
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[hanaaragab]

Where it manufactures the best furniture for all the rooms in the house where we manufacture bedrooms and living rooms as well as kitchen and other rooms in your home.???? ????? ??? ??? ??????? Also, the designs in our company are very modern and modern

[hanaaragab]

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[Pro Libertate]

Ah, drone regulation does have a precedent.