The Independents

Tonight on The Independents: Ferguson Fallout, Obama's Tortures, the Terrorists Are Coming!, Comedy in a World With No Humor, and Online-Only Aftershow



Tonight The Independents (Fox Business Network, 9 p.m. ET, 6 p.m. PT, repeats three hours later) returns live to bring some sanity to a world gone bonkers. Ferguson kicks things off, appropriately, what with Charles Barkley going rogue, Rudy going Giuliani, Al Sharpton going to the White House, and President Barack Obama going to his pen. Joining to sort through it all are Party Panelists Michael Malice (hair club model) and Lachlan Markay (Washington Free Beacon staff writer).

Also on the show:

* Ex-CIA anger bear Mike Baker on the latest terror threats.

* Comedian Jimmy Failla on the problem of humor in the era of Ray Rice apology tours.

* Kmele Foster on the latest torture reports.

Online-only aftershow begins at just after 10. Follow The Independents on Facebook at, follow on Twitter @ independentsFBN, hashtag us at #TheIndependents, and click on this page for more video of past segments.

NEXT: Chris Rock Stopped Performing for Students Because Everything Offends Them

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  1. I’m not liking the Malice to Moynihan ratio on the panels.

  2. Maybe Sharpton’s going just to pay his taxes?

  3. Bernie Sanders’ 12 Step Economic Plan for America is Every Bit As Batshit Crazy As You’d Think

    Can we call him a racist for being so against free trade policies that have lifted tens of millions of people out of poverty globally in the last 30 years? Most of them aren’t white, after all.

    1. So “Independent” = “lefty ignoramus”?
      I see reference to the “Bush-Cheney” war, but none whatsoever to the “Obama” wars.
      I also see that at least 6 years of bailouts have delivered exactly what he’s upset about, so he proposes to do it all over again.

    2. 3. We need to develop new economic models…

      You weren’t kidding, this is right out of any crazy person’s manifesto. A Truther guy I knew would pepper his writings with the need for new “models” for shaping society to his vision.

    3. Shorter Bernie

      “We need to go broke faster.”

    4. The Democrats are loaded with fresh new talent and new ideas.


    5. So which dem potus candidate for 2016 can out derp the others?

      White Squaw: You didn’t build that!

      Hillary: Businesses don’t create jobs!

      Uncle Bernie: Free markets have failed!

      Uncle Joe: What? Uh, we should buy Hawaii from the Russians and learn that Chinese that they speak!

      It’s going to be a pure derpfest.

      1. Biden isn’t really going to run, is he? Because that would be awesome and hilarious.

        1. He said that he was going to. I think he said ‘You’ll all vote for me’ or something like that.

          1. Why wouldn’t you vote for Biden?

        2. Just Biden his time. It’s really a slate of morons.

          1. I see what you did.

    6. ” trade policies that have lifted tens of millions of people out of poverty”


    7. Couldn’t Trump just put them all on Celebrity apprentice? Do that and all is forgiven.

    8. Every single one of those things is tried and proven to be economy destroying. Pure idiocy, but what else would you expect from a pinko?

      Goddamn fuckin’ idiot commies. Sanders should pull a Budd Dwyer. It would be the only time he made the world a better place.

      As a testimony to the unfathomable ignorance of the American voter a majority of them voted twice to put a guy in the oval office who said “I sought out Marxist professors” and “Under my plan energy prices would necessarily skyrocket”.

      Fuck every idiot who voted for those two morons.

      1. He is describing contemporary Germany you moron. I think the lesson is that a modern capitalist country can thrive DESPITE those bad policies.

        1. Fuck off, turd.

          1. You idiots will never understand that a Sanders looks at the great success of Germany and wrongly credits national healthcare and green infrastructure programs with said success. A rationalist would stress what Germany does well in its private sector and quit disparaging German voters.

            1. Fuck off, turd.

    9. 6. Women workers today earn 78 percent of what their male counterparts make. We need pay equity in our country — equal pay for equal work.

      I really, really enjoy it when people pull this figure out of their ass. Especially when they do it in such a completely generic, rhetorical way. It just feels so fake. Anyone who pulls out this figure is telling you one of two things:

      1. They are an idiot who can’t read statistics and doesn’t understand the concept of a Simpson’s paradox, or
      2. They’re lying.

      1. Men work more hours or years on average. You should have known that.

        1. Um, where did I mention I didn’t know that? I referred to the fact that it’s a Simpson’s paradox. Said paradox is primarily caused by the difference in hours.

          Perhaps you should actually read what I wrote, rather than trying to smugly claim that I ‘should have known’ something that I deliberately didn’t expand into? Right, this is a sad little ego trip for you, conclude on.

          1. A ButtFace cannot read and comprehend the English language. The ButtFace has proven this again and again to the extent that it is no longer in doubt.

    10. I made it all the way from 1 (repair our crumbling infrastructure!) down to 3: “We need to develop new economic models to increase job creation and productivity.”

      It’s brilliant in its own pomo sort of way.

      Actual economists have been pointing out for centuries that jobs are a cost, not a benefit–if we could have all the wealth we have today without jobs, we’d be much richer than we are now, as we’d be able to spend our time on other things that add value to our lives beyond work.

      We don’t want more jobs, Bernie. We want more stuff, and it’s only by having more stuff, generally through having productive people, you know, actually produce something of value to themselves and others rather than sitting at home waiting for a check.

      A new economic model isn’t going to change the reality humanity faces: people need stuff, and the way they get stuff is by specializing in their labor and then trading with other specialists via a process that we label markets, but which is not a thing in itself.

      That people still don’t understand this simple concept is a good sign that we’re still only a few steps out of the cave ideologically. Bring on the hyperintelligent AIs, I say.

    11. It’s crazy, unserious, contradictory. Ergo, it is likely to be embraced by many in the country.

  4. Ex-CIA anger bear

    Is this a gay thing of which I am unaware? NTTAWWT.

    1. dafuq?

    2. So more midgety than gay? Got it.

  5. “Ex-CIA anger bear Mike Baker”

    “Torture… well, let me tell you…. kids stuff. Discomfort. Loud noises. Maybe a pooch. In ‘the business’ we learn what the Other Guys do, and I assure you, its no picnic. Chinese. Wouldn’t believe what they can do with Bamboo. Creative people. One time, in Turkey…”

    1. No pointy cushion? No comfy chair?

      1. Mike Baker =

        “… yeah, there’s more than one use for an eggbeater, let me tell you. Also, the Mexicans? They have a thing with Seltzer and Chili powder… crazy stuff… Nicest people though, really. Don’t let the death squads fool you….”

  6. INDEPENDT, shake off your tryptophan stupor and comment!

    1. We could use a bit more rain, doncha think?

  7. Prediction: I’m late

  8. Prediction: I’m not gonna watch, because it costs $10/mo. to upgrade my package!

    1. upgrade my package

      I’ll forward you this email I keep getting about adding a few inches…

      1. I already talked to Warty. The Doomcock is unavailable, but I may be able to get an older model.

        1. The Really Bad Day Cock is also unavailable.

  9. Stream no work.

    1. Stream costs big wampum! Vote for White Squaw. Business don’t make stream! White Squaw make stream for everyone!

      1. Stop quoting from my porno Wanksgiving: Baste that golden stream!

  10. I AM NOT AN ANIMAL I AM A MAN. (That’s a palindrome!)

    1. Sarah Palin is funny

      1. He was great in Monty Python.

        1. Ha!

  11. Wilson could always go federal.

  12. Yeah like that pain management activist who was terrorized by a federal prosecutor via grand jury.

  13. The Independents Attire Review, 1 December 2014

    Great Expectations-Edition

    – Kennedy: We have previously dubbed this the “1970s Australian Sci-Fi B-Movie Heroine”. Or something like that. Brevity, soul of wit… we know. Sometimes I don’t care enough. We think its pretty cool if she’s DJ’ing at a lesbian bar later. We’d boogie.

    – Matt: ‘Triumvirate Of Blue’. Not a Miles Davis record-title, but it could well have been. For Matt, we think this is something of a style-victory: it works, and he actually recognized it. We think he could do well trying to do similar ‘consonant’ tie-pairings with some of his less-successful colored shirts.

    – Kmele: The Tweed favorite jacket is being collar-raped by the chambray shirt. Its overhanging his lapels and I want to grab him like a cloying mother and straighten him out.

    – Lachlan: The only man I’ve ever seen that appears more “Dead Person”-Irish-colored than me. He always wears the grey suit and the blue tie and its a ‘flexible and hip’ look that works with the unbuttoned color. We’d buy him a drink, and it would totally not be gay.

    Matur nuwun

  14. Why are they talking about the protests? It’s the first of the month, EBT card are full and Walmart is open 24/7! It’s the ultimate protest killer.

  15. Welch is about to start chanting Ruby Ridge.

  16. Yeah, right, you big eared doofus, we totally trust the government that has militarized our police force to keep an eye on them.

  17. The Government Solution to Everything = SPEND MORE

    1. And have more people write more reports. So people in other departments will create new jobs to read the reports we just mandated. Which allows us to spend more on things that don’t even have anything to do the the problem. Because why not?

      1. Mission creep is the lifeblood of the bureaucratic branch of the government.

        1. We’re going to need more funding.

        2. trshmnster the terrible|12.1.14 @ 9:20PM|#
          ‘Mission creep is the lifeblood of the […] government.’


  18. Sounds like justice system reform is worthy of a Friday show.


    1. Rat bagging tea fucker child murderer!

  20. And don’t forget, Matt, we can always sell that military surplus to our friends, the ‘moderate’ terrorists. Oh, fuck, that would be racist, let’s give them away!

    To tell the truth, I’d rather that the terrorists in some 3rd world desert have those weapons that the terrorists on our streets, the cops, have them.

  21. They’re militarizing for the eventual citizen pacification they believe will be necessary. Duh.

    1. Well, that includes all of you tea fucking libertarians.

  22. When’s Rand Paul going to be on the show?

  23. Mike Baker =

    “ISIS? Al Qaeda on steroids. Not as intellectual. More action, less yapping. Not so clever, but who said Stupid isn’t dangerous? My hair? No, not Grecian Formula. Just for Men. Is that Sexist? I don’t think so.”

    1. So he’s a spook version of Craig Kilborn?

      1. Except he’s somewhat entertaining. Baker that is.

      2. Good comparison

        I remember the 1990s Sportscenter crew when Kilborn, Chris Berman, Kieth Olbermann, etc. ran the show and they had perfected a kind of rapid-patter Dude Lingo that i can see people like Mike Baker imitating in order to seem ‘authoritative’

  24. Evening derp round-up:

    An SJW “shreds” the case against Michael Brown

    You can stop reading at this part:

    Shelby Lawson is a student at the University of Kansas, majoring in Journalism and Women, Gender and Sexuality Studies.

    Melissa Harris Perry on police shooting black people

    1. I looked in detail at one or two of the “sources” and tried to correlate them with her “facts.” Let me just say thank God that she isn’t in a hard science. People like her are the ones that plow billion dollar space probes into the ground with their poor quality control.

      1. For example, here’s Gender Studier and Journalist Extraordinaire’s take:

        Owner of Ferguson Market states […] that the theft had nothing to do with Mike Brown, and that the man on the security footage is not Mike Brown.

        Here’s Daily Kos’ take:

        Ferguson Market attorney also says any alleged theft of cigars had nothing to do with Michael Brown being shot to death by Ferguson police

        Ferguson Market attorney acknowledges the obvious, “Whatever the police are looking for on the surveillance tape, has nothing to do with what went on in the street.

        Somebody needs to look at getting a refund for her ethics of journalism course, because she’s a fucking liar!

    2. I listened up the Dred Scott part. Yecch.

      1. The squirrels agree!

      2. Squirrels on steroids?

    1. I’m truly sorry our country is prosperous enough to allow idjits like Aida Manduley make a living from such despicable activities.

  25. I can’t even remember the last time that I took my shoes off before getting on a plane.

  26. Gingers aren’t happy, they’re scheming.

  27. I’m now a lot more afraid of turbulence than terrorists. Right before landing in Indy on the 24th it was like being on a roller coaster. At one time, I swear the plane must suddenly have fell like 50 ft. I thought I would come out of my seat with the belt on.

    We need a war on turbulence.

  28. The serum that Kennedy is making fun of is actually not a joke, and should be taken seriously.

    New technologies are starting to emerge. Look for government to try killing each and every one of them.

  29. They’re advertising pillows now? As if the show itself wasn’t sleep inducing enough.

  30. Nothing is ever funny. Nothing.

  31. Bill C – when so many women come out of the shadows with such similar stories you just know he is a rapist.

    … C for Clinton

    1. It is not rape when they ask for it.

      1. Whatever, turd.

      2. Kathleen Willey! Gennifer Flowers!

        They asked to be raped. Thanks for reminding us, asshole.

  32. Malice can become insufferable very quickly.

  33. Mark Ames on MSNBC. Did you know that the Koch brothers hired Hayek as a respectable shill for their evil plan to destroy Social Security? And did you know that Hayek was worried about losing his Austrian healthcare (in a letter that is never shown)?

    1. It’s not like MSNBC is biased at all, right? I mean the invitation to sign up for that PAC is just news coverage, I guess.

  34. Why couldn’t the hax0rs have stolen Spider-Man and given him back to Marvel?

  35. See if you can make it more than a minute into this video:

    1. I’m halfway through it and already bored to tears. Between amy goodman and Ames, they can turn ANYTHING that isnt harcore-prog propaganda into a conspiracy by the Birchers/KOCHTOPUS to destroy the planet

    2. Yeah, because Democrats and their union thugs would never, ever resort to such tactics.

      I love it when the guy starts talking though. ‘uhh, umm, uhh, umm’. Obviously Obama is his role model for speaking.

    3. Amazing!
      A privately-held company issues a letter with political views!
      The HORROR!
      And Ames comments about Koch’s view of the best president are just those of a fish finding out that air exists.

  36. If I had to bet, I would say the hackers are Russian. Why would I think such a thing? I hate Russians, obviously, there couldn’t be any other reason. Come to think of it, I hate Canadians more, it was obviously Canadians.

  37. And now we enter the TMZ portion of the show.

    1. Its trending on twitter! They have to devote time to meaningless low-brow celebrity bullshit because uh, its like, Millenial and stuff. Because if they talk too long about actual news topics that people will stop paying attention.

  38. Cleveland Chris Browns ??

    Why not Oakland Rapers??

  39. Kmele, the grand jury system doesn’t exist to make you feel good, or to prosecute people you think should go to trial. One of the functions of the system is to prevent prosecutors from dragging people to trial who should not be. The grand jury decided that Darren Wilson should not be tried. His story matched the physical evidence and much of the witness evidence. There’s no good reason to try him. He would be found not guilty. Deal with it.

  40. I went on a long road trip for Thanksgiving. My journey took me through Texas, New Mexico, Colorado, Wyoming, Nebraska, & the Dakotas. I ended up just across the state line in Baker, Montana. I visited Devil’s Tower & Car Henge and many other things.

    The highways got me thinking. Progs say that things like education and healthcare should be like the roads- publicly funded, open to all. But here’s the thing- a road is a uniform good. A road that works for a car will also work for a motorcycle, bus, or truck. For a road, one size fits all.

    But the educational and healthcare needs for people are vastly different. One size does not fit all.

    1. Or = roads are a widely shared capital asset you build once and then maintain and which everyone gets equal value from.

      Education and healthcare are non-stop labor-intensive services than never stop requiring new resources and which have hugely different needs from different parts of the population.

      The first is something that makes sense to be paid for by the government. (more or less) The latter are far more suited to be tailored to the customer.

      1. Exactly. There is almost infinite potential demand for medical care.

        1. I’m pretty sure you can leave “almost” out.

  41. prediction = aftershow stream still dead. LIES!

  42. “Kmele Foster is going to break it down for us in minutes.”

    Scratch that. After Kennedy’s verbose intro, Foster will have seconds to break it down, not minutes.

  43. Right after the Ray Rice incident, I saw a lot of Ray Rice jerseys around town. I never noticed that before. But I definitely have to say that Ray Rice did not become any less popular in Baltimore after the incident. My take? It’s a family affair as far as I’m concerned. His wife doesn’t want to push it, then just drop it. The NFL can make their own rules, but a lot of NFL players are roided up thugs, and I have this to say:

    NFL players are NOT role models for our children. Just stop with that shit already. They’re professional entertainers doing their job, they are not saints or role models for children.

  44. Its only Rock n Roll to me.

  45. Because ‘torture’ is a subject which we want to squeeze in at the end of the show when we only have about 1 minute left and zero opportunity to discuss.


  46. DERBZ, meh.

  47. Does anyone have a working aftershow link?


    dead to me

  48. Gilmore gets a mention in the aftershow.

    1. Now you’re just teasing you whore

      1. Markay apparently read your “‘Dead Person’-Irish-colored” comment.

        1. Well lets be honest, he makes Malice look downright ‘ethnic’

          Confession = i was called ‘casper’ for many years. As in, ‘the ghost’

  49. Why are the protesters wearing that white face shit? Isn’t that French? Is that racist?

    I’m getting a trigger warning. My great great great grandfather’s nieces sister’s brother’s aunt’s cousin was French. Or at least that’s why my cousins nephew’s brother’s mother’s 2nd cousin’s sister found out on

    1. “Or at least that’s why my cousins nephew’s brother’s mother’s 2nd cousin’s sister found out on”

      And she entered every damn thing about you that she ever heard from any relative to get that “information”, too.

      1. And that got her into Harvard.

  50. Kennedy knows as a woman she’s not accountable for any of her actions.

    1. Not sure that’s fair. She’s actually really going against the grain to side with libertarians. Maybe she deserves a better chance than that.

        1. Neither am I bro, but being a female libertarian has to be one of the bravest positions on this planet right now.

    2. I have two things to say about Kennedy. One…would. Two…I forget the second thing.

    1. Yep, that’s it in a nutshell. At least the attitude part.

    2. Wow, if the LP believed in intellectual property rights they’d sue the producers for ripping off the party’s platform.

    3. Wow, if the LP believed in intellectual property rights they’d sue the producers for ripping off the party’s platform.

  51. Oh, God. They’re talking rugby.

  52. Another Daisy Duke quality cut-off for Kennedy.

  53. I have seen more and more ads about child hunger in the US. It appears the progs are circling back to the lies they peddled 30 years ago. Thomas Sowell has a nice lecture debunking such stats:

    1. The poor childins in inner city Balmer are so emaciated that they couldn’t even stop one of those full size SUVs when they walk out into traffic to intentionally taunt the motorists to hit them. Sure, ok, they could stop a smart car on impact and walk away laughing, but there is nothing funny about 7 year olds who don’t even weigh 300 lbs. yet, you fucking racists!

    2. Thomas Sowell for President, or TS for God Emperor? Discuss.

      I’m open to either.

      1. After the current empire falls and Libertaria rises from the ashes, I think I’m first in line for the vacant Supreme Overlord spot.

        1. I think I’m first in line for the vacant Supreme Overlord spot.


          1. I’m told one of you is looking at the Supreme Court Overlord spot.

            But that’s hearsay.

            1. But that’s hearsay.

              No, you speak heresy. TS for God Emperor.

              Bow before his Sowellness. Bow!

    3. That presentation is more than a generation old, and we’re still hearing the same bs about hunger. The only widespread hunger I know of in the United States is caused by jailing people who feed the hungry homeless in “public” parks and the hunger of schoolkids who had their already terrible state lunches demolished to ensure they don’t become obese.

      The recycling of the same debunked ideas–hunger, crumbling infrastructure, poverty as a relative rather than absolute consideration, and on and on–for generations is an indication that these are fundamentally not arguments based in reason, but in moral preening and other forms of soapbox standing and social/personal signaling.

      Like the Ferguson protesters running around with the long-debunked “arms up, don’t shoot” idiocy, the continued existence of the Population-Bomb crowd, or YECs, these people have allowed social identifiers to take precedence over actual reality. The terrible thing is that they’re not sufficiently self-aware to realize their cultic motivations for clinging to absurd, obviously self-serving stances.

  54. Fox News did a pretty mean obituary for Kurt Vonnegut back in 2007:

    1. I’ve got, what, 6 or 8 of his books on the shelf. Not sure why, since they all seem to say the same thing.
      One would do just fine, except for the clever phrases.

  55. He’s pale, his last name is Malice, and he only appears at night.

    I’m pretty sure the guy is a vampire.

  56. Vonnegut was the most tolerable kind of prog, but a prog he was:

    So let’s divide up the wealth more fairly than we have divided it up so far. Let’s make sure that everybody has enough to eat, and a decent place to live, and medical help when he needs it. Let’s stop spending money on weapons, which don’t work anyway, thank God, and spend money on each other. It isn’t moonbeams to talk of modest plenty for all. They have it in Sweden. We can have it here. Dwight David Eisenhower once pointed out that Sweden, with its many utopian programs, had a high rate of alcoholism and suicide and youthful unrest. Even so, I would like to see America try socialism. If we start drinking heavily and killing ourselves, and if our children start acting crazy, we can go back to good old Free Enterprise again.

    1. Vonnegut was something of the Proto-Prog

      But! if you read “Welcome to the Monkey House” (his first and only good book of short fiction), he’s VERY skeptical of government and hates intervention by “Top Men” on anything. Chaos is the ideal. He changed his tune in the 70s… but in his earliest writings – like “Harrison Bergeron” or “The Eupheo Question” or the eponymous story… they’re all about how ‘top down solutions’ all fail.

    2. You know what else they have in Sweden? Lots and lots of Swedes.

  57. Mike Baker is a statist hack who advocates murdering Edward Snowden.

    Unless he’s there to be raked over the coals, commie-kid style, I have zero interest in watching him on a nominally libertarian show.

  58. Start working at home with Google! It’s by-far the best job I’ve had. Last Wednesday I got a brand new BMW since getting a check for $6474 this – 4 weeks past. I began this 8-months ago and immediately was bringing home at least $77 per hour. I work through this link,
    go to tech tab for work detail ?????????????

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