Rand Paul

Rand Paul: GOP Brand "Sucks" Like Domino's Pizza

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Sen. Rand Paul (R-Ky.) wants the GOP to avoid the political equivalent of the Domino's Pizza Noid.

The Noid was the late, ulamented mascot of Domino's Pizza long before the company admitted just how bad its pizza really was.

From The Hill:

Paul acknowledged Wednesday a problem that many Republicans admit only privately: their party brand "sucks."  

The weakness, Paul added, is particularly serious when it comes to appealing to black voters.

"Remember Domino's Pizza? They admitted, 'Hey, our pizza crust sucks.' The Republican Party brand sucks and so people don't want to be a Republican and for 80 years, African-Americans have had nothing to do with Republicans," he said.

"Why? Because of a perception," he said. "The problem is the perception is that no one in the Republican Party cares."

Read the whole thing.

Actually, I'd argue that the deeper problem is that the perception is actually pretty accurate. With the notable exception of school choice, the typical Republican politician doesn't spend a lot of time talking about public policies that would have a particularly positive affect on black communities. Some of that is understandable, given that blacks overwhelmingly vote for Democrats. But the failure to reach out to African Americans even rhetorically doesn't just sour black voters on the Party of Lincoln, either. It alienates a lot of moderates and independents who are bothered by the way in which Republicans seem indifferent, if not hostile, to blacks. While white Republicans have only marginally higher results on indices of negative racial attitudes than white Democrats, they are also dealing with a particularly charged recent history that includes Nixon's southern strategy, Barry Goldwater's willingness to pander to neo-Confederates, and even his father's racist newsletters. That sort of narrative isn't going to rewrite itself.

For more than the past year, Paul has been engaging black audiences around the country. It's precisely this sort of activity that helps make him "the most interesting man in politics" according to Time. And it's not simply on this issue, of course. He's actually pushing for new discussions on privacy, sentencing reform, military spending, domestic spending, foreign policy, and more.

In other words, he's taking the future of his party seriously. After the 2012 election and Mitt Romney's pathetic showing against the weakest sitting president in recent memory, that GOP promised a thorough, top-to-bottom overhaul of its messages and policies. Not much has really come of that effort. That's partly understandable: The Dems and Obama have been so relentlessly bad on so many things, all the GOP has to do is keep quiet and they can win back the Senate. But when Rand Paul and others point out that the party's limited-government rhetoric doesn't match its spending record, foreign policy, or respect for privacy and civil liberties, you'd think the reformers were preaching Menshevism or something.

Republicans can bitch and moan about how unfair it all is and how no, really, they've never done anything wrong (even increasing spending under George W. Bush by 55 percent in real dollars). But the fact is that even big wins next week won't change the party's long-term problems connecting with voters. Self-identification as Republican hit a 25-year low among voters this year. That's a sign of a "brand" that needs changing. Unsolicited advice: Try actually living up to your semi-libertarian rhetoric when it comes to reducing the size, scope, and spending of government at all levels. Even if you bank on the Democrats sucking all the time (not a bad gamble), people can always disaffiliate with either party out of disgust. Which is exactly what's happening.

In April 2013, Reason TV covered Paul's speech about race and politics at Howard University. That was the first stop in his continuing outreach to minority audiences that the GOP has ignored for years. Take a look at reactions:

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  1. You know what’s good? Domino’s Specialty Chicken–especially the Classic Buffalo.

    1. Is it? It looks disgusting on the commercials.

          1. Tender bites of lightly breaded, 100% whole breast white meat chicken, topped with classic hot buffalo sauce, ranch, a blend of cheese made with mozzarella and cheddar, and feta.

            1. You have to order the “Kicker Sauce”; I forgot to add that part.

      1. Or, if you prefer:

        Tender bites of lightly breaded, 100% whole breast white meat chicken, topped with garlic parmesan white sauce, a blend of cheese made with mozzarella and cheddar, crispy bacon and tomato.

        1. Might as well list the other ones:

          Tender bites of lightly breaded, 100% whole breast white meat chicken, topped with sweet and smoky BBQ sauce, a blend of cheese made with mozzarella and cheddar, and crispy bacon.

          ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

          Tender bites of lightly breaded, 100% whole breast white meat chicken, topped with sweet and spicy mango-habanero sauce, a blend of cheese made with mozzarella and cheddar, jalapeno and pineapple.

    2. I like dominos. There, I said it.

      1. True story: I’ve never had Dominos pizza, but it looks terrible.

        1. Their crust is quite a bit better than it used to be. The sauce has been changed, too.

          I think Domino’s “Brooklyn Style” pizza quite good.

          1. Their commercials gross me out. Every item looks like a carb overload. Stuffed crust and cinnamon & sugar bread sticks? Why not just load some mashed potatoes and mac & cheese on the pizza and die already.

            1. Cheap ass shitty carbs are where the profit margin is, dude. Just look at Olive Garden.

              “Hey, have you tried the pasta? It’s got a real nice profit margin. BAM!”

              1. Olive Garden used to have “stuffed chicken parmesan”. I wish they still had it.

                1. I wish they still had it.

                  Fella, you need an intervention. Put down that nutritionally valueless carb/mystery meat and go eat some saturated fat infused protein. Your heart will thank you.

                  1. Fella, you need an intervention. (etc.)

                    I’ve tried snob food before. How you get so big, eating food of this kind?

            2. Why not just load some mashed potatoes and mac & cheese on the pizza and die already.

              I would so buy a mac and cheese pizza.

              1. Mad Pizza in Seattle sometimes has a mac and cheese pizza. Their pizza is pretty awful to start with so I would probably never go near their mac and cheese one.

              2. I would so buy a mac and cheese pizza.

                My local place has baked ziti pizza.

                1. (So does mine actually, and it’s good, but ziti isn’t a comfort food the way mac and cheese is)

              3. Cici’s Pizza makes them sometimes.

                1. I’m actually not a fan of Cici’s, if you can believe it.

            3. Every item looks like a carb overload.

              HAHA, WTF do you think PIZZA is?

              Jesus, some people…

              I actually don’t like their new crust, too greasy.

      2. Their pizza is actually quite a bit better since they retooled their product. I have to give them props for coming out in their advertising and saying, “The customer has said our pizza is terrible, so we’re trying to make it better.” It’s obviously not top-shelf, but if you’re going for a chain brand, you can definitely do worse (like Papa John’s ketchup-and-cardboard abominations).

        1. Never tried PapaJohn’s. Thanks for the warning.

          -jcr

          1. Papa John’s puts their cheese on the top. And it’s not “ketchup-and-cardboard”, but the sauce is sweeter than Domino’s.

      3. Sadly, I have to say that the best fast food pizza ever was Shakey’s.

        If anyone has their recipe I would appreciate having it. I have been trying to duplicate it for 20 years from memory and it still eludes me.

        1. Well played, sir.

  2. “With the notble exception of school choice, the typical Republican politician doesn’t spend a lot of time talking about public policies that would have a particularly positive affect on black communities.”

    Apparently Nick spends less time editing than Republicans spend talking about policies affecting the black community.

    1. I thought the paragraph was particularly affective (sic)!!

    2. His editing skills are ulamented.

  3. “With the notble exception of school choice, the typical Republican politician doesn’t spend a lot of time talking about public policies that would have a particularly positive affect on black communities.”

    Apparently Nick spends less time editing than Republicans spend talking about policies affecting the black community.

    1. Sorry, could you say that again? I missed it.

      1. I can’t control how many posts one click of the “submit” button creates.

    2. Think that’s bad? This is from a couple days ago:

      Likely over Paul’s own dead body (doubtless for most voters in a general election, that will be a label he’ll want to distance himself from, not embrace), and despite the two named sources, National Committee Executive Director Wes Benedict and Party Chair Nicholas Sarwark*, saying it just maybe might could happen, my own read of the L.P. rank and file from years of following it is that it would be shocking indeed if a bare majority of the types of activists who troubles themselves to end up as delegates to national L.P. conventions could allow their sense of self to survive linking their Party with the GOP, even for a candidate with as many decent qualities as Paul.

      The asterisk is because the name was originally misspelled, but that is apparently one sentence.

      1. The Doherty! It’s spreading!

  4. I’m eating Little Caesar’s? right now. Does anyone else eat Fritos with their Little Caesar’s? Pizza?

      1. Papa Johns now has a Fritos pizza.

        1. Is it..*smacks lips*…worthy?

    1. Little Caesar’s is gross. There, I said it.

    2. Q: How do Mexicans cut their pizza?
      A: With Little Ceasars.

      1. Snicker

  5. With the notble [sic] exception of school choice, the typical Republican politician doesn’t spend a lot of time talking about public policies that would have a particularly positive affect on black communities.

    The GOP is anti-abortion, so there’s that.

  6. Great, now I’m jones-ing to see Republican poticital ads in the style of Dominoes “we used to suck, but now we are trying stuff different”, the “some ideas don’t work out, but this baked chicken totally does”, and the “failure is an option”.

    Where is the PAC that will take my money to see this vision come to light?

  7. I had a Dominos pizza last night while I was watching Night of the Demons. Republican politics were not involved.

    1. But what did the Millenials think?

    2. Hugh just admitted eating Dominos! You all saw it!

      Oh, I have you this time, Hugh, you slippery devil.

      1. There’s nothing wrong with Domnios, Epi. It’s the same as any other pizza out there.

        1. Do you smoke heavily, Hugh? Or is it a brain tumor?

          1. I think it’s the extra chromosome.

            1. Hugh, who is your daddy, and what does he do?

              1. Epi, let my show you my fyerret. He don’t bite, don’t worry.

    3. Night of the Demons is about the Democrat Party, then?

      1. Yes, absolutely. Because if something has nothing to do with Republican politics, it must by definition be affiliated with the Democrats.

        1. But…it has “Demo–” right in the title!

        2. Hugh, you’re not thinking TEAM enough! Think TEAM harder!

        3. If it came out of Hollywood, I can almost guarantee it’s somehow affiliated with the Democrat Party.

          1. It looked like it was filmed in the Valley. I don’t imagine it got any studio backing unless you count the tips the producers got from their day jobs waiting tables.

            1. So it was a porn?

              1. Porn actors would have been embarrassed at dialog and production values this bad. Plus they make way better money than this film ever did.

    1. Basically, the Republicans have to change their brand from deep dish to thin crust, or they’re doomed.

      1. So they’ll give up on Chicago?

        1. I’m pretty sure they gave up on Chicago long ago.

      2. Despite the association with Chicago, deep-dish pizza is the pizza of freedom. It was invented by Ben Franklin.

        1. You lie! It was invented by your mom!

  8. Admittedly changing African-American voting patterns would be a decades long process (as indeed perhaps changing the Republican party would be generational),

    but would a candidate Rand Paul receive the same 9% of the African-American vote or coudl it be possibly up to 15% in 2016?

    Could that extra 5-6% be critical in certain swing states?

    1. but would a candidate Rand Paul receive the same 9% of the African-American vote or coudl it be possibly up to 15% in 2016?

      Honestly, I’m not sure it matters in itself. If a Paul run is something blacks are less likely to go out and vote against, that helps him.

  9. With the notble [sic] exception of school choice, the typical Republican politician doesn’t spend a lot of time talking about public policies that would have a particularly positive affect on black communities.

    They also generally support tax cuts; that would have a positive effect on black communities.

  10. Whether or not Rand Paul gets the GOP nomination, IMO he’s doing the right thing politically for everyone concerned.

    If there’s anything that millenials are right about (and it may be the only thing) its that the 2 party system is a choice between flavors of rancid-self-serving-scumbags, and that the only thing anyone finds appealing are those willing to buck the traditional party lines and rebuild a political identity from scratch.

    Even he himself is unable to completely do it, and i doubt he’d be successful even if he did. But he consistently points his fingers at the right problems.

    I am aware the knee-jerk non-interventionists found his recent ruminations on national-security issues disappointing, but i think you have to accept that more important than the absolute position is the relative direction he’s trying to move things in. In general, he’s *less* interventiony than any previous republican candidate, and in fact appears much smarter than the current administration in understanding how force & diplomacy work side-by-side to achieve goals.

    I continue to find things to like about him.

  11. Domino’s isn’t half bad these days, for the price.

    I doubt the Republicans will make similar improvements, or any for that matter.

    1. The problem I had with Domino’s (until they fixed the problem just recently), is that it would not allow you to stack coupons when ordering online. You can use infinity of the same coupon on papajohns.com, plus PJ’s gives you “points” every time you order a pizza. Once you achieve 25 points, you get a free pizza. This makes PJ’s less expensive than Domino’s.

  12. That “Rand Paul in Detroit” photo wouldn’t go down well in the UK.

    1. I was going to say, it looks they’ve just gotten done being a line up.

  13. I grew up thinking Domino’s was like classy pizza because it was so much better than the home-town garbage we usually ate (upstate NY which might as well be Chicago pizza-wise).

    1. You know, when I moved north, I really wanted to like Chicago-style pizza, but after trying it several times, I found it just doesn’t do it for me.

      I like Detroit-style deep dish, but NY floppy pizza is my favorite.

      Tampa had several “NY Style” Pizzerias scattered about. The people actually from NY (which was half the population. The other half came from the Caribbean) said it wasn’t as good, because the water in FL is suboptimal for making pizza dough, or something.

      1. the water in FL is suboptimal for making pizza dough, or something.

        The water in Tampa is suboptimal for pissing in; I don’t even like to boil spaghetti in it.

      2. but what about the heathens in STL? with their squares and “cheese”.

      3. I’m in NJ near Trenton (thanks for the sympathy)and believe it or not the local dive bar has the best pizza in this area which is saying a lot because this is the land of pizza.

    2. Many years ago, it was extremely difficult to get any even moderately good pizza outside of major cities or the known good pizza places like New Haven, CT or North Jersey. I knew what good pizza was and I could not get it in northeast CT, let me tell you.

    3. I grew up thinking Little Caesar’s was awesome. And it was, because I was a little kid and kids have terrible taste. PIZZA PIZZA

      1. Warty’s favorite pizza is grade school cafeteria pizza.

        1. That stuff was the shit. Those little cubes of ham? Delicious.

          1. It pains me to admit that I also loved it. God, kids have the worst taste.

            1. I remember once telling my mom that I liked the cafeteria spaghetti better than hers. She forgave me instantly because she knew that children are stupid.

              1. I don’t know, I was never that stupid. What’s the matter, steroids make you stupid?

              2. She forgave me instantly because she knew that her children are stupid.

                FTFY

            2. Oh yeah? They serve Domino’s pizza in my daughter’s school and she LOVES it! Top that, Domino’s school cafeteria pizza! She’s the worst!!

      2. When they came out with the giant rectangle pizza, I got really excited.

        1. Oh hell yeah. No more wasted space in the box!

    4. Nina’s Pizza. Norwich, NY. Get it. You won’t know what a pizza desert is until you move west.

  14. Domino’s really turned it around. It is still chain delivery pizza, and not great, but it is head over heels better than the competition. The marketing campaign was great. One of the few times advertisements have directly influenced my habits.

    1. ‘Head-and-shoulders better than the competition’

      1. Head-and-Shoulders is pretty good, too.

  15. The Howard University clip is terribly depressing. Maybe one of the people interviewed seemed to have an even slightly open view of Paul or anything he said. And even then it was tentative – basically only willing to call it a start.

    I really don’t think most people vote on particular issues a candidate identifies with, as odd as that may sound to some. People make their decisions on a much more basic level.

    I’m reminded of when Bush beat Kerry, and one of the primary reasons give was that Bush was the sort of guy people would want to have a beer with…basically, he came off as a regular joe compared to Kerry and it was the difference. Kerry is a shitbag, anyway, but the point is, I think a candidate could say everything a person or group of people want to hear, but having a R next to their name as opposed to a D would negate it entirely.

    1. Ah, the 2004 Election. I’d honestly forgotten about that one.

    2. Absolutely. I’ve posted Rand or Amash quotes without attribution on social media and progs love the quotes(drug war, drone, police militarization stuff). But ask them “what do you think of Rand Paul?” A: douchebag, racists, retard, on and on and on.

    3. It’s all about RAH RAH TEAM RED/TEAM BLUE and people feeling like they can “identify” with a candidate. That’s part of why Obama was so successful – he had very little record to defend, and spoke in broad platitudes, so it was easy for people to imagine that he was whatever they wanted him to be.

      But yeah, most people’s brains shut down when they hear TEAM RED/TEAM BLUE. Around here, if you say “Republican”, most people will automatically jump to “racist mouthbreather who wants eternal war, destroying the environment and making poor people suffer”, regardless of what the actual issues are.

    4. The Howard University clip is terribly depressing. Maybe one of the people interviewed seemed to have an even slightly open view of Paul or anything he said.

      I disagree. Paul was probably the first Republican a lot of those people ever had come speak to them. For a couple of hours. And that’s after years of being told that Republicans hate them with a white hot passion.

  16. With all the polls you’ve sponsored, has anyone ever asked African-Americans what the GOP could do to win their votes? Until we know that, then we don’t know if the GOP would be right to curry their favor or not.

    1. Curry in the pizza sauce? I have my doubts…

  17. they are also dealing with a particularly charged recent history that includes Nixon’s southern strategy, Barry Goldwater’s willingness to pander to neo-Confederates, and even his father’s racist newsletters. That sort of narrative isn’t going to rewrite itself.

    Nick’s column isn’t going to rewrite itself either.

  18. He is right the brand sucks. Sadly, however, it doesn’t suck for the reasons it should suck or the reasons Libertarians would like to convince themselves it sucks. It should suck because the GOP are sellouts who constantly roll over to the Democrats and too often are just as committed to big government and tyranny as the Democrats.

    That, however, is not why the brand sucks. The brand sucks because the major media and the popular culture has convinced the country that the Republicans do not do those things enough or with enough sincerity.

    1. Their brand sucks because they insist on fighting a failed culture war at the expense of what should be their real objectives. Socialism remains as unpopular as ever, but hating fags is far less popular.

      1. That sounds like a good idea except for two things. First, the left will never stop fighting the culture war. Even if you give up on everything, they will just find a new issue. The left succeeds by marginalizing its opponents. The right has done nothing but lost the culture war. Yet it still goes on because there is no way to make peace with the left. Give way on gays and they move on to gay marriage. Give way on that and they move on to transvestite rights. Give up on that and they move on to something else.

        The second problem with doing that is the left uses the culture war as a way to criminalize views they don’t. If losing the culture war were just about leaving people alone, it would be different. But that is not how the left rolls. They make losing the culture war mean total surrender and the criminalization or at least complete marginalization of the other side. So there is no way to surrender on the culture war without either joining the left or being completely banished from society.

        1. Blah blah blah

          The reason the left’s culture war attacks on the GOP work is because of the GOP’s positions. See for instance the South Caroline GOP guy that wrote about how gays are subverting culture or the like.

          1. If you think so and think those issues are so important, vote Democrat. They will come though on them for you. Is there any issue you hold more dear than the fucking gays? Is there any harm you wouldn’t support if you thought it would help the gays?

            1. You missed the fucking point and substituted it with positions and beliefs I don’t hold. How typically John.

              Seriously, stop posting. You’re an embarrassment. You only serve the function of acting as a warning against trying any long-term alliance with conservatives.

          2. On one side you have people criminalizing wrong thoughts on the gays, on the other you have some random GOP guy who said something mean.

            How is this equivalent in libertopia?

      2. One other thing Warty, some people object to gays. And it is a free country. Why does objecting to gays mean you no longer are allowed a voice in politics?

        It is funny how Libertarians are all about liberty right up until defending someone’s liberty involves defending a group that is unpopular with the elite. Then the attitude seems to be “you only get oppressed because you suck so bad and won’t just shut the fuck up and act like everyone else”.

        1. All I’m saying is that Republicans are tactical morons. Bitches need more Sun Tzu.

          1. I know. And you should be right. And you would be right if we were dealing with anything but a bunch of fucking fanatics. I don’t honestly know how you deal with these people anymore because being reasonable sure doesn’t work and being unreasonable makes you as bad as they are.

            1. The worst political development in the last hundred years is that anti-socialism became so inextricably bound up with religious fanaticism and ignorant bumpkinism. That shit needs to stop. The Republicans never were the part of William Jennings Bryan and they need to remember it if they ever want to be important again.

              1. …anti-socialism became so inextricably bound up with religious fanaticism and ignorant bumpkinism.

                Huh. I thought it was inextricably bound to robber baron-ism.

                1. No, Warty makes an excellent point. The fact that if you vocally oppose socialism (and actually use the word “socialism”), pretty much everybody (not just leftists) assumes at this point that you’re also a socon and strongly religious. That’s not a good connection for those of us who do totally oppose socialism but aren’t socons or religious. These are positions that really shouldn’t have any intrinsic connection, but through the GOP, they have.

                  1. Interesting. I thought that Socons were more associated with Populism than anti-Socialism. As an aside, in the 2008 campaign, the Supreme Socon candidate, Huckabee, was labelled by numerous commentators as a “Pro-Life Socialist”.

                    1. Interesting, you seem to be utterly missing the point. I didn’t say a socon couldn’t be considered a socialist. I said if you advocate outright anti-socialism, especially actually using the word socialism, almost everyone just automatically assumes you are a strongly religious socon. See the difference?

                    2. Interesting, you seem to be utterly missing the point.

                      You’re not the boss of me.

                      I didn’t say a socon couldn’t be considered a socialist. I said if you advocate outright anti-socialism, especially actually using the word socialism, almost everyone just automatically assumes you are a strongly religious socon. See the difference?

                      And I reiterate that SoCons are more associated with Populism than anti-socialism. While there may be some overlap, “anti-socialists” are associated with the Republican Party as a whole more than with a particular faction of it.

              2. No they were not. And even the people associated with that were not as portrayed. Mostly being liberal in this country is a way for people to signal their smugness. It really has nothing to do with reality. We seem to have totally lost the ability to just not care if someone holds views we don’t like. We have endlessly fuck with them and use their views and our objection to them as a way to make ourselves feel superior. If it wasn’t so dangerous it would be pathetic.

                1. Yes, the I Fucking Love Tolerance crowd.

                2. “We seem to have totally lost the ability to just not care if someone holds views we don’t like. ”

                  Like howling at the moon when a greeter says ‘Happy Holidays’ to you instead of ‘Merry Christmas?’

                  1. Socon werewolves vs Cosmotarian vampires!

                    1. Socon werewolves vs Cosmotarian vampires!

                      Jets vs. Sharks

        2. Wait, who is oppressed here? Your persecution complex is showing. Hard.

          1. I am not oppressed at all. The world fucking loves me. I, however, and not some crazy evangelical trying to run a business or who feels the need to object to gay marriage or anything homosexual. If I were one of those, I would be in danger of at the very least being sued into bankruptcy. For whatever reason that fact bothers me even though it does not and never will effect me personally. Perhaps I don’t trust the people doing it to stop with just them or something.

            1. Why does objecting to gays mean you no longer are allowed a voice in politics?

              From that to:

              crazy evangelical trying to run a business or who feels the need to object to gay marriage or anything homosexual.

              Woosh go the goal posts. God you suck at focusing. A common conservative trait I might add.

              1. The two posts were making different points. But you are too stupid to understand that and I am not going to waste my time explaining it to you.

                If you are too stupid to follow the argument and you clearly are, you need to not engage in it and let the adults talk for a while.

                1. Then you need to learn how to focus and stop jumping from topic to topic. We’re talking about the GOP and its stupidity and how that affects its awful brand.

                  1. I focus fine. The problem is you are too stupid to follow the arguments and consistently misunderstand them. And at some point it stops being worth it trying to explain them to you.

            2. I, however, and not some crazy evangelical

              *cough*bullshit*cough*

              1. You got me Dragon. What gave me away my desire to legalize drive or possession of child pornography?

                Bo is just dishonest. Tony is just a troll. Shreds is just insane. You however are just really that stupid you cannot understand that anyone could defend the rights of a group and not be one.

          2. Define oppressed. I may think your an asshole. Sometimes I hate people for nothing but the look on their face. Is that a good enough reason? Or does it have to be vetted? Is this libertarian train headed to forcing people to like everyone? If that’s the dream, there’s no need for any NAP, we’re all just gonna love each other.

            I figured we needed to draw the lines precisely because we don’t and won’t ever get along. But if it’s just carte blanche on beating all the people who aren’t thinking right then let’s get the gulags fired up. There’s no possible way to bring about ideological homogeneity that’s necessary for “freedom” without culling the wrong thinkers out.

        3. Conservative persecution complex detected.

          1. That is right. Standing up for someone’s rights against a bunch of fascists just means you have a persecution complex. It is not like people haven’t lost their jobs for the crime of donating to the wrong political cause or been sued out of business for not serving a gay wedding or anything. That CEO guy just has a persecution complex just like those Jews in the 1920s who had their windows shattered.

            1. Goal posts moving and melodrama. Focus.

              1. Again, the adults are talking. You have repeatedly proven unable to add anything to these debates. Just do yourself and everyone else a favor and walk away.

            2. The problem is, John, most of the commenters here oppose public accommodation laws and think the SJWs are a bunch of douchenozzles.

              1. That can’t be. Why, just yesterday John was telling me that libertarians push for legal action against people who won’t bake cakes for gays. Why would he make up something like that? It must be true.

      3. They should just give in to the SJWs, because otherwise, CULTURE WAR.

        Good luck with that.

        1. As a dedicated SoCon, I learned to stop worrying about the Kulture Warz once I realized we’re outbreeding everybody else.

    2. The brand also sucks because so many GOP voters keep looking for “the next Reagan”, who, as enjoyable as he was to listen to, didn’t govern all that conservatively.

      Stuck in the past, they cannot build a rocketship bridge to the future.

      1. Reagan didn’t govern all that conservatively because he didn’t have a conservative Congress and unlike Obama didn’t declare himself dictator.

        1. That’s not the only reason. Stop lying.

          1. Sorry Dude, I have to live in reality and can’t live in your imagine world. Talk to someone else if you want your narrative confirmed.

            1. You live in your own reality, where Reagan didn’t sign up for ‘saving’ SS with a tax increase or ramp up the War on Drugs.

              1. Conservative != libertarian. Conservatives are generally supportive of both SS and the WOD. “Saving” SS and fighting the WOD weren’t inconsistent with conservative governance.

    3. And what alternative narrative does the Republican establishment offer the public? If you say you favor limited government and because big government sucks, but then back big government, they’re kind of going to assume that you don’t think it sucks, but oppose it for some other reason.

  19. “With the notable exception of school choice, the typical Republican politician doesn’t spend a lot of time talking about public policies that would have a particularly positive affect on black communities.”

    As opposed to the Democrats who have spent 50 years talking about policies that would have a positive effect on black communities and look at how good things are now in black communities.

    1. Of course if you’re criticizi republicans you must love democrats.

  20. Do not diss Chicago. The pizza at Spacca Napoli is as good as 99% of what I could get at the better artisanal places in Italy. I shit you not.

    Domino’s is so bad that when we tried it and couldn’t get past the first couple of bites, our dog refused to eat it. The only thing worse is Gatti’s, which might qualify as Hazmat.

    1. Little Caesar’s isn’t worse than Domino’s?

      1. In the sense that Tim Tebow is worse than Geno Smith?

        1. It’s pretty brutal when the Jets pull Geno and put in a totally unmotivated Vick and you go “thank Jeebus”.

          They got rid of Sanchez, and I thought they could go nowhere but up. Oops!

          1. Couldn’t happen to a nicer team.

            Saw what tonight’s game was, and I may go do something more interesting, like trim my toenails.

            1. Hatewatching the Jets is more fun when their QB is terrible like Sanchez, rather than terrible like Geno.

              1. We reserve our best hatewatching for the Broncos and the Evil Irsays. Hating the Jets is like hating the retarded kid who always shits his pants.

      2. We actually did an experiment with home delivery pizza, so that we could at least say we tried them. Most of them were so mediocre that it was difficult to rank. The outliers were California Pizza Kitchen (all flavor scientifically removed), Gatti’s (is that on purpose???), and Sarpino’s (which was actually pretty decent). Domino’s, Pizza Hut, Papa John’s, Little Caesar’s, all fell in the “not even offensive enough to be interesting” category.

        1. The only way to make delivery shit edible is if they have some form of extreme thin crust option. That at least gets rid of most of the terrible, shitty dough crust and just leaves mediocre sauce and cheese (and any toppings). Cheese, even crap part-skim mozzarella, is hard to completely fuck up, and toppings can make it tolerable.

          Of course I haven’t had to make a desperation order like that in years, thankfully.

          1. Most of the delivery pizza cheese seemed to be made from a blend of polysorbate 80 and Brown 25.

        2. I’ve got two home delivery vendors near me that both do a pretty good job. They’re both small local chains, one of them has four locations, the other has two.

          -jcr

      3. I tried Little Caesar’s once. The crust reminded me of a damp paper towel. That was over ten years ago, I’ve had no interest in giving them another chance.

        -jcr

    2. Chicago ‘oily bread in a pan slathered with sauce’ is not pizza, and most of the food in restaurants (aside from the odd steakhouse) is flavorless midwestern slurry that only impresses people who’s normal idea of ‘ethnic food’ is Olive Garden

  21. We really liked Hungry Howie’s pizza, when we lived in Tampa. They had a “sandwich” which was really a medium pizza crust wrapped around fillers. Chicken Parmesan…quite good.

    1. Casey’s (the gas store chain) also makes good pizza. It goes well with Fritos?, too. And Goose Island Root Beer.

      1. Did you chew on lead-laced paint chips as a child?

        1. Some people have taste. Some people have anti-taste, which I suppose is a form of taste. Just a really bad one.

        2. You have to dip them in mayonnaise, first.

          1. Or, preferably, Miracle Whip.

            1. Miracle Whip? You just went from bad taste to pure evil.

              1. BWAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

                *in demonic voice mode

                I used to make a balogna sandwich with miracle whip on white bread, eat one bite, throw the bread away, eat a bite out of the balogna, and then lick the Miracle Whip off.

                  1. That’s no defense. Cafeteria pizza isn’t one one-thousandth as evil and vile as Miracle Whip. Miracle Whip is so disgusting the thought of it is making me dry heave.

                    1. I wasn’t comparing cafeteria pizza to miracle whip. I was referring to your statement that, as children, we have terrible tastes.

                1. baloney

                  bologni

                  bulleaunie

                    1. Red Sugar Ham

                      Green Eggs and Ham

                      Why can’t I get things tonight right?

    2. hungry howies is decent, as is Jet’s along with other detroit style pizza’s.

      papa john’s on the other hand should just buy frozen pizza’s from the store and sell them as their own.

      1. Frozen pizza or the Chef Boyardee pizza kits?

  22. Mexicans, dope, ass-sex…and pizza?

    1. Don’t forget the ebola…..Mexicans, dope, butt sex, pizza and ebola – or things libertarians like. 😉

      1. Or, that poor Mexican will be bleeding out of his ass for one reason or another.

        1. And gentlemen, I believe we now have a comment to bring this conversation to a close.

          Good Night!

  23. That girl at 0:44 looks like she’s planning a career as a Professionally Offended Person.

    -jcr

  24. Without yet reading any of the comments here, I have to say one thing. Sometimes on days at work when we have a special ad hoc impromptu staff meeting, they order pizza. They always get Dominos. I don’t know why, but they do. Maybe the Dominos is close. I even hear some people say how good it is. So I have to tell the truth here. That is the worst fucking pizza I have ever ate in my life. When I say it is bad, I mean it’s horrible. It would be cruel to feed that crap to a dog.

    1. But after having read the comments, I have to withdraw my post. I forgot about Papa Johns, which is even worse. Calling it cardboard is an insult to cardboard.

  25. There’s a place in New Port Richey, FL, that makes a good pizza: Stassi’s, I believe it is called. It’s out where River Ridge Road meets Moon Lake Road, if I remember the street names correctly.

  26. “Actually, I’d argue that the deeper problem is that the perception is actually pretty accurate.”

    And I would agree.

  27. Out West here, we have Roundtable Pizza, and, despite the name, they make a damn good pizza.

    1. Quality of Pizza is roughly correlated to how good the water is in your area, and how far away from Chicago you are.

    2. No. No, they don’t.

      1. Don’t contradict Jesus, you old pagan, you.

  28. It’s real simple. Democrats say blacks are poor and they will give them money. Republicans say that won’t work, so democrats say Republicans are racists. So blacks vote for the guy who isn’t “racist” and also wants to give them money and other perks. To win the black vote they need to promise more free shit. Repeat for women- free birth control, children-free college, other generally irresponsible people- free healthcare, etc., etc.

    Democrats are auctioning off the GDP and other perks for votes. Eventually everyone has a stake n maintaining their perk.

  29. Avoid Pizza Ranch. I just remembered them.

    1. Pizza Ranch has good salad and their chicken is passable.The pizza is terrible even by northern midwest standards. It is best to avoid any and all states with a Pizza Ranch for many other reasons. Unless you are going fishing.

  30. Is Reason making fun of Kenneth Noid by using that picture? He’s not going to like that.

    (Am I the only one who even remembers Kenneth Noid?)

  31. Nick Gillespie calling for a “politics of identity”. How predictable.

  32. Wow no wonder the Libertarian cause can’t get any national traction. Still playing the left/right dynamic thinking it will turn out better next election cycle. The two party system is the problem and until a third party rises to challenge both of them nothing will change. I can’t stand SoCons and ignorant bumpkins on the right, nor can I stand the free shit army on the left. Quit being co opted by these tools and get out there and support real liberty, personal responsibility, and justice. Looks like this is nothing but a fucktard circle jerk….

  33. So, the pizza thread will not be complete unless someone mentions the original chain pizza restaurant.

    I, of course, will not do so.

    1. 9-9-9

  34. lol, US politics, best politics money can buy.

    http://www.anon-way.tk

  35. Nick, editors:
    You write, “…the typical Republican politician doesn’t spend a lot of time talking about public policies that would have a particularly positive affect on black communities.”

    Please correct “affect” to “effect.” Thanks.

  36. Unsolicited advice: Try actually living up to your semi-libertarian rhetoric when it comes to reducing the size, scope, and spending of government at all levels.

    why on earth would they do that? Republican voters love big government!

  37. Re-branding an inferior political product is a swell idea that still stinks.

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