Tonight on The Independents: Perry vs. Rand, Millennial Poll, Sealing the Border, Jailing Free-Range Parents, Licensing Times Square Cartoon Characters, Defending Sweatshops, Zany After-show and More!

Tonight's episode of The Independents (Fox Business Network, 9 p.m. ET, 6 p.m. PT, with re-airs three hours later) begins with a topic that's gotten some play here today at Hit & Run: The latest Republican attack on the alleged "isolationism" of Sen. Rand Paul (R-Kentucky). Joining to discuss will be Party Panelists Michael Malice (insane person, Reason contributor) and Guy Benson (Townhall political editor). Those two are also slated to debate Sgt. Bowe Bergdahl's return to active duty, the mom who was jailed for letting her 9-year-old play unsupervised in the park, and the man who declared a wretched part of North Africa his own kingdom so he could appoint his daughter a princess.

Breitbart.com Senior Editor at Large Ben Shapiro will come on to talk about his "8 Reasons to Close the Border Now" piece; New York City Councilman Andy King will defend his proposal to require background checks on those creepy Times Square cartoon characters, Kmele Foster will (of course!) defend the Bolivian government's new law legalizing employment for 10-year-olds, and the co-hosts will chew on that great Reason-Rupe Millennials poll that we haven't talked about enough here on the blog.

AS IF THAT WASN'T ENOUGH, the online-only aftershow begins on foxbusiness.com/independents just after 10. Follow The Independents on Facebook at facebook.com/IndependentsFBN, follow on Twitter @ independentsFBN, tweet during the show & we'll use the best. Click on this page for more video of past segments.

Comments

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Meanwhile, in Russia.

The weather here is....
....boring.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Why does everything in Russia look so miserable?

There's a reason why there's no Russian version of The Beach Boys.

[Almanian!]

God hates the US worse than Russia*?

*yeah, I fucking despise that surfin' shit

[Rufus J. Firefly]

No kidding. You play the bag pipes and wear a kilt.

Which incidentally Scotland is wearing at the Commonwealth Games. Pretty cool if you ask me.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

I would show up for that weather. Best beach day ever.

[Antilles]

Actually, Saint Petersburg is an amazing, beautiful city (it looks like Gotham--I know, I've been there). I despise Communism but Saint Petersburg is worth visiting. Trust me...

[jesse.in.mb]

You've been to Gotham?

I've read an excess of Russian urban fantasy novels in the past 6 months and am kind of curious to see some of the locations.

[Antilles]

Sorry if I was being glib. But all I know of Gotham was what I saw in the Tim Burton 'Batman' movies. But Saint Petersburg (in parts) looked just like the dramatic architecture of the fictional 'Gotham.' It is very impressive, and I recommend to to all thinking people. But you should go during the Summer or Spring, not the dead of Winter as I did. Lol...

[jesse.in.mb]

I wouldn't worry about it. I was just ribbing you a bit. I've heard good things about Petrograd.

I tend to do a lot of my travel in late fall/early winter. There've been a few times it's been unfortunate, but mostly I like missing the crowds. Russia seems like it'd be automatically unfortunate in winter.

[jesse.in.mb]

*removes from things jesse will link during PM Links tomorrow*

I like the woman with the stars and stripes bikini. In Siberia.

[Ted S.]

Somebody posted a link to the story (not the Youtube video) in the Mourning Lynx thread.

[jesse.in.mb]

I don't recognize the authority of anything posted before I'm half way through my first cup of coffee.

[Sudden]

Now you understand my bizarre fascination with visiting Novosibirsk?

[jesse.in.mb]

I didn't even know that was part of your itinerary, but I'm still in other travel plans permitting.

[Brett L]

That could easily be a lake in Nebraska.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

I'm more likely to visit Russia.

[Brett L]

Da.

[Sudden]

Ya tozha

[Lady Bertrum]

Reminds me of the week I spent with a friend and our kids in Myrtle Beach.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

I've seen hail twice in my life. Neither time was here.

[jesse.in.mb]

Wait, really? I've only seen it here.

Once in middle school and once in 1998/99. I was late for class. The teacher started to chew me out for it, and I said "Sorry, it's hailing out. Everyone should go outside and look." The entire class emptied except me and the teacher.

I smiled and said "Am I late?"

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Never here. Closest was Lake Arrowhead during summer camp.

The other time was on the gunflint trail in Northern Minnesota. Tennis ball sized.

[jesse.in.mb]

Nothing that big here. Everything was between pea and grape sized.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Feminist attacks the right-wing theocratic rape-denialism of...Eleanon Clift?

http://www.cotwa.info/2014/07/.....enier.html

[Rufus J. Firefly]

You know you're left-left wing when you attack Clift.

[Vulgar Madman]

In the future everyone will be a right wing theocratic rape-denier for 15 minutes.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Study suggests fracking, earthquake link

http://www.newrepublic.com/art.....ign=buffer

[Sevo]

So the science was settled a year ago, and yet it's not settled?
And the study specifically does not claim causation:
"Induced seismicity associated with fluid injection into a deep well in Youngstown, Ohio"

[Warrren]

What if there was an earthquake that caused oil to shoot out of the ground?

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Then old Jed's a millionaire.

[Warrren]

Millionaire? Does inflation not exist in your unoverse?

[Notorious G.K.C.]

*Uno*-verse?

Are you having a Se?or moment?

[Warrren]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NC7Q5L3ejrg

[Ted S.]

This is the Unoverse.

[Sudden]

You only had one thing to say...

[Warrren]

I don't have a link!

[Notorious G.K.C.]

That's OK - I'll cover for you. Here's something I posted yesterday.

Jamaican journalist is skeptical of ganja legalization - Parliament isn't legalizing it, but is making it a citable offense and exempting Rastafarians.

The journalist opposed the proposed Rastafarian exemption, and calls for calm.

"Let's think these things through. Let's debate them rationally, not viscerally, as we are wont to do in Jamaica. The Raelians reportedly have sex orgies and nudist camps as part of their religion. They encourage teen sex for our extraterrestrial creators like that. Would Jamaica grant them special camps where they can have their sex rituals, the denial of which would make us guilty of suppressing people's religious rights? I don't believe religious people should have special privileges in a secular society."

http://jamaica-gleaner.com/gle.....ocus3.html

[Aloysious]

I'll help too! Music...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-FCKt0cdu6s

[GILMORE]

That picture strangely reminds me of this

[Almanian!]

Odd - I had exactly the same reaction upon seeing it

[GILMORE]

.... also, i saw the oddest thing in my mashed potatoes tonight...

[Heroic Mulatto]

Some White America dude claimed a piece of land on the border of Egypt and Sudan with flag and everything? It's going to be so fucking awesome when Al-Qaida in Sudan goes jihad bil saif on his ass.

I mean, hasn't the dude read Churchill's The River War? Those motherfuckers are crazy.

[Warrren]

As a member of White America I disavow any knowledge of his actions. Unless it turns out great.

[Heroic Mulatto]

Heaton, who ran for Congress out of Virginia's 9th district in 2012 and lost, plans to reach out to the African Union for assistance in formally establishing the Kingdom of North Sudan and said that he is confident they will welcome him. Representatives from the Egyptian and Sudanese embassies in Washington did not respond to requests for comment Saturday.

There is no possible way this won't turn out great.

[Warrren]

I smell high-concept reality show!

[Heroic Mulatto]

In a Friday sermon, Egyptian cleric Mustafa Al-Aqsari said that Bernard Lewis was responsible for "the most dangerous enterprise in history ? the plan to divide the Islamic world into mini-states" and that this plot had been ratified by Congress in 1993. The sermon was posted on the Internet on April 17, 2014.

Maybe the dude has a point.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

This is the best idea EVER!

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0073341/

[Vulgar Madman]

Will there be roads? If so I'm not interested.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

+1000s of fuzzy-wuzzies

[Almanian!]

I heard this on the news. Kennedy was on some show on the radio via Fox talking about it.

Allegedly, she was dressed as a Princess and wore a tiara and everything.

Having it on radio rather than TV - I am disappoint.

[GILMORE]

OMG THEY ARE HAVING A RENAISSANCE FAIR!?!

[Suthenboy]

I saw that on the sheppard smith show, whatever that is called. Kennedy was cool, as always.

[jesse.in.mb]

I saw something decrying that family's privilege and then I turned off my computer and walked out of the room.

[Sudden]

We've all been victims of microaggression.

[Vulgar Madman]

Anyone can just blow their brains out, this guy has style.

[GILMORE]

*Zany* aftershow??

OMG Matt's going to juggle!

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Going by yesterday's photo, he's going to joust.

[GILMORE]

Maybe they're doing the obligatory time-traveling episode.... which is invariably, for budgetary reasons, a 'renaissance fair'

I vote Kmele for The Black Knight, Matt for squire Galahad.... and Kennedy for his horse... who later turns out to be a witch, natch

[Notorious G.K.C.]

So much that's wrong...

Anyone can wear black armor, it's hard to see your race behind that cool vizor.

Galahad was a knight, not a squire.

And that last part...I don't even...

[Notorious G.K.C.]

But you could at least do the armor reviews.

[Heroic Mulatto]

What do you think Matt's natural THAC0 is?

[Aloysious]

19. I think his table would be the same as a wizard. Or henchman.

[Heroic Mulatto]

So does that mean Matt can cast Magic Missile? Or was he one of those who chose Read Magic as their first spell?

[Aloysious]

Mending. And possibly Faerie Fire.

[DesigNate]

NERDS!

[GILMORE]

Dude, you never do the time-travelling episode with your star *already knighted*?!!

That's the payoff at the end!! After he turns the horse into a woman!? Then he gets made a knight. Sheesh! its like you never saw TV before.

[Heroic Mulatto]

How exactly does one turn a horse into a woman?

[GILMORE]

Duh, you release it from the curse that the Evil Wizard put it under.

[Heroic Mulatto]

I was thinking it required a bottle of wine and a slow hand.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

More like the *reason* I don't watch TV.

[Dweebston]

I've only ever heard of it the other way around.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

INDEPENDENTS ASSEMBLE!

[Notorious G.K.C.]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xybbnMbAews

[Francisco d'Anconia]

I had a real thing for Susanna Hoffs.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Is the stream fucked for anyone?

[Heroic Mulatto]

The official one or the samizdat one?

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Official.

I think?

[Heroic Mulatto]

I'm having no problem with the official one.

[Ted S.]

I wasn't watching it at any source. I was watching the end of the Kay Fwancis movie on TCM.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Fuck Rick Perry.

That is all.

[Heroic Mulatto]

I wouldn't fuck Perry with Tony's dick.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

What about Jesse's?

[jesse.in.mb]

Really? You don't think having a "so this one time I ended up sodomizing Gov Rick Perry" story wouldn't be amazing for winning weird tales over drinks?

[Heroic Mulatto]

I just wouldn't want any part of Tony attached to me.

[jesse.in.mb]

Hmm. I was assuming some kind of advanced teledildonics.

Incredulity withdrawn.

[Heroic Mulatto]

I would totally be down with a "Being John Malkovich" scenario where we could take turns entering Tony's head and forcing him to do stuff, like make a contribution to a Koch Bros. PAC.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

I perpetually live in a 'Being John Malkovich' world.

[Trouser-Pod]

BTW, Advanced Teledildonics; excellent album name.

[seguin]

Sounds like an electropop Butthole Surfers cover band.

[Sudden]

Or Scientology book.

[Brett L]

He is a very handsome man. I met him when I interned at the TX State Capital in '98. The lady who managed my representative's office had been Perry's secretary back in the day.

[Sudden]

Well, Hilary Clinton is a handsome man too, but you don't see me fantasizing about her.

[Wasteland Wanderer]

In what world?

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

If he wins, I will enjoy the butthurt on the left. That's about it.

[Sudden]

He may also provide as many lulz as a Biden presidency would.

[DesigNate]

If Perry won the nomination we'd be treated to at least three months of hair jokes.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Paul/Perry 2016!!!!

[Brett L]

Did they start drinking early? Kennedy is stumbling, Matt misses a couple. And Matt and Kmele are obviously the straight men for green tie and velvet smoking jacket.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Split screen. This program is high tech.

[GILMORE]

Guy Benson has clearly tasted of the fountain of Youth.

he's actually 63

[Brett L]

Shout out to Bob Dole '76? Does this mean we can finally have Rand as the man of our time in '36?

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Can he share a desk with all those dog-killing, person-beating cops?

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Serious question.

The killing of Archie Andrews. Necessary?

Discuss.

[Heroic Mulatto]

Well, how else is he going to turn into a zombie? DUH!

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Isn't he already a zombie?

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Darn it.

[GILMORE]

The Independents Attire Review, 14 June 2014

Fuck The French-Edition

- Kennedy: Princess Kennedy is wearing her best "Elvish Gown of the Ancient Mystery Dream of the Magic Fire", which amplifies the timeless purity of her flawless complexion and glimmers with the depth of a thousand pools in the silent moonlight of the endless forest of... Whatever. Just put on an fucking Enya record, its pretty much the same deal.

- Matt: Agent M.

- Kmele: Agent K.

*Note: our predictions for this "time-traveling" episode have gone distinctly awry, with Matt and Kmele sent into The Future, and Kennedy sent into the deep-past, where she rules as queen over the timeless Elf children, whom are being harrassed by evil-gnome-person Michael Malice. We have no idea how this one resolves itself.

Nemaiyo
(*Vulcan!)

[GILMORE]

I'm beginning to gather than someone needs to "Seal the Border"... which is something probably involving throwing a ring into a volcano.

[Sudden]

You have it all wrong. It means anyone who spends a night in your place must sleep in a full size seal costume.

[GILMORE]

Also, Kmele looks awesome

[Heroic Mulatto]

Shut the fuck up @hyannis1954. No one asked you.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Big Southern Hole

[Brett L]

Cut his mike!

[Brett L]

Although I respect his ability to fend off Kennedy's cut off attempts.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

MOAR MILLENNIALZ!

[Notorious G.K.C.]

There is no evidence that Marie Antoinette said "Let them eat cake."

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Let_them_eat_cake

[Sevo]

And Willy Sutton never said he robbed banks 'cause that's where the money is.

[jesse.in.mb]

Mmm brioche. I wonder if I have enough butter and eggs to whip up a rich bread dough...

No, I need to buy more butter. Sadness.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

/stabbed in the heart.

We Canadians give a lot of to YOUR pop culture.

Some respect please.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Bryan Adams?

What are you talking aboot, body?

[Rufus J. Firefly]

You have a fetish for Adams you'd like to talk about?

[GILMORE]

Thats A BOAT

[Ted S.]

And much of it (Justin Bieber, Anne Murray) we wish you would have kept.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

I'll take back Ivan Reitman (no Animal House for you!) and Neil Young.

And Mary Pickford just for you, Ted S.

[Derpetologist]

OK, it's time for everyone's favorite game. Which H&R troll should spoof first?

[Derpetologist]

*Which troll should I spoof first?

[Heroic Mulatto]

Hercule....duh!

[Brett L]

Cats!... And EMPIRE

[GILMORE]

Too wordy. breaks character limit.

[Aloysious]

shrike.

[SweatingGin]

Underzog!

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Do me! Do me!

[Derpetologist]

I flattered. Maybe even a little curious. But the answer is NO!

[Notorious G.K.C.]

The accent was on the "me," not the "do."

If you don't do ME, how about anonbot?

[Ted S.]

Do me

[Heroic Mulatto]

Back in the muthafuckin day!

[GILMORE]

On the road to mandalay.

No, really. That thing has an extremely distinct formula. until it blows up and begins reciting its pre-programmed list of 'things you should do with your butt'

[AlmightyJB]

Fat Discrimination? Disturbing images.

http://www.nbc4i.com/story/260.....ecgbypass;

[Aloysious]

Chillicothe, Ohio?

Home of Archie Goodwin, leg man (lackey, flunky) to Nero Wolfe.

[AlmightyJB]

The same.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Ah, Nero Wolfe. I liked that show.

[Aloysious]

Available on dvd. It was a must buy, for me.

[Sudden]

Incidentally, pronounced the same a Chtulu

[GILMORE]

great comment =

"Regina Fetherolf ? Works at Eastland-Fairfield Career Center

I read the whole story. I "get" what the girl is saying, but I still have to ask, "WHY???????""?

[Warrren]

I ain't no Holocaust girl.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Millennials are confused and not worth my time if they can't be bothered to, you know, READ AND INFORM THEMSELVES.

[Heroic Mulatto]

You can't expect them to read more than 10 items on a Buzzfeed list, and you want them to read broadly and deeply enough to inform themselves on multivariate social phenomena?

[AlmightyJB]

They get all the information they need to form an uninformed opinion from facebook and twitter.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

And Jon Stewart.

[Lady Bertrum]

Why didn't anyone tell me Magic Mike is such an awesome movie?

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Because I didn't...see it?

[Warrren]

Male gazer!

[AlmightyJB]

I didn't see it either but I'm pretty sure that can't be true.

[jesse.in.mb]

WE THOUGHT YOU KNEW!

[jesse.in.mb]

Apparently Pettyfer won't be back because he's a pain to work with. I haz a sad.

[Lady Bertrum]

Mathew McConaughey is so creepy and sexy. Creepy-sexy. He's teaching another guy how to dance and is spooning and grinding on him. He's wearing a half-belly shirt and speedos. He should've gotten an Oscar for this movie.

[jesse.in.mb]

You mean this scene?

[Lady Bertrum]

Yes. That yellow belly shirt is just...odd.

[GILMORE]

Well, that's $200,000 well spent

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Both Matt and Hillary have been poor.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

It's a miracle.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Sort of. They're probably looking at irreversible brain damage.

[GILMORE]

And won't *that* make a real cute Youtube clip!

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Now there's an image. Poor Matt smoking in a park shivering in the cold.

[SweatingGin]

Wearing the tattered garb from last night's picture. Maybe a chunk of chain mail over one shoulder.

[GILMORE]

...then rich Kennedy walks by in her fur coat while talking on her celly... stops, is about to give him some change...then she sees he's smoking, and goes, "You should really *quit* you know"... and walks off.

[Heroic Mulatto]

We call that Patient Zero of the H1Z1 necro-virus.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Happens sometimes, but now it's on Youtube.

[GILMORE]

Yeah, its a beautiful story... until you're *BURIED ALIVE?*

[Francisco d'Anconia]

The bright side of death.

When it's somebody else.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Not even a fist pump he gets right.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

A root beer, a scoop of vanilla ice cream, and a scoop of hate.

[Trouser-Pod]

Yes, they do, Kennedy. They shit their brains out.

[GILMORE]

Float? That's a Ford!

[Notorious G.K.C.]

The rationale is that the Community Relations Service goes into...communities...when there are racial divisions in that community.

IIRC, the CRS helped worked out a deal for the Illinois Nazis in Skokie, but the Nazis chickened out.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Wow, there's a paper on that very topic:

http://digitalcommons.wayne.ed.....xt=socprac

[GILMORE]

SSSHHHHHHHH!!!! Xnay with the upidstay meeelekay!!! *Topical Storm!* We don't use the S word!

[GILMORE]

Man, i wish whomever made that song would just die already

[Notorious G.K.C.]

We're no strangers to love
You know the rules and so do I
You're the only one that I've been dreaming of
You won't get this from any other guy

[GILMORE]

Most lou reed songs seem far better when you read them on paper.

[Derpetologist]

I will spoof Hercule first, but I have to keep the quotes short.

Try to spot the Not:

1. Clinton must be seen for what she represents, the Plutocracy of Hypocrisy, the Capitalist State, where the wealth is held in the hands of [1%] of the population, where elections are nothing but brought and paid for shams, paid for in large part by [AIPAC/AZC] the American Israel Political Action Committee/American Zionist Committee.

2. The [EMPIRE] has been afforded more leeway, by convention, to pay lower [PDRC] and international interest rates via., the confidence in their ability to support international debt, but once that debt now will exceeds [100%] the interest rate on the debt equals the nominal growth rate, and at that point growth becomes untenable, and stops.

3. The [EMPIRE] will not lumber on forever. Soon, its [GDP] to debt ration will exceed even that of [GREECE]. When the [$US$] hyperinflates, it will lose its status as [RESERVE CURRENCY]forthwith! The trite games of the Republicrats will come crashing to a halt and the ruling class will flee for [BELIZE].

[Notorious G.K.C.]

3

[Heroic Mulatto]

3

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Are you allowed to answer?

3.

[SweatingGin]

Those are exhausting to read.

3

[GILMORE]

THWEEEE!!

(holds up 4 fingers, looks at hand, then folds one finger under a thumb with some difficulty)

[Francisco d'Anconia]

3 is the only one not on the intertubez.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Cheater.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

I look at it as using all my available resources.

[jesse.in.mb]

DON'T DEMONIZE CREATIVE PROBLEM SOLVING!

[Derpetologist]

I see there's no fooling you this time. It is challenge to spoof someone who is genuinely crazy.

[SweatingGin]

I was guessing until I hit [BELIZE]

[Ted S.]

Belize navidad,
Belize navidad,
Belize navidad,
Prospero a?o y belizidad.

[Irish]

You used way too many [brackets.]

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Oh please. 'Real' Royalty is crazy.

[jesse.in.mb]

FRONEY IS NOT A THING

[Heroic Mulatto]

Denial is the 1st stage.

[SweatingGin]

Pretty sure they just coined it. No going back now.

[jesse.in.mb]

Are we just going to pile this on Andrew S.?

[GILMORE]

Michael Malice has committed a cardinal sin =

he is wearing a colored undershirt... and it shows.

This is typically punished by slow death.

[Aloysious]

My guess is #2. Fewer [BRACKETS].

[Aloysious]

Threading fail.

[Brett L]

Which is sadder, the "Pocket Hose" guy trading on his connections to Tool Time or Metallica's ESPN commercial?

[Notorious G.K.C.]

What's wrong with foreign maid security software?

[Trouser-Pod]

Ask Strauss-Kahn.

[jesse.in.mb]

I just hate it when my hose leaks and sprays more on me than where I'm pointing it.

[SweatingGin]

Hehehe... He said "Pockethose"

"Even a drop!"

[Heroic Mulatto]

HOLY SHIT!!!!!!

[GILMORE]

That guy really 'elevated' the quality of the program.

As in, you had to be *fucking high* to appreciate how ridiculous it was.

[Derpetologist]

While I let folks puzzle over [EMPIRE], I will spoof On the Road to Hooters Mandalay.

1. What the Hell!!! The great wad of Americans probably don't need any health insurance plans anyway. If they can't afford it they don't deserve it. Right? Besides, the fuckers who control everything can be counted on to create new overseas wars that will get rid of some of us, and then natural disasters should take care of some more.

2. Fuck you, you deluded Randroid. You should be grateful I even deign to join in on your libber-tarry-tardian circle jerk. Face it- you hate poor people and want them to starve so there's more money for you. You're all just Republicans in denial.

3. Generally, I have found that people posting on this site that don't like the opinions of others, but who are apparently to stupid to challenge or refute them, hide behind the cloak of cowardice by insulting others. I have defended myself from these attacks by returning nastiness with nastiness.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

2

[Lady Bertrum]

#1

I have to say the person who came up with "libber-tarry-tardian circle jerk" is some kind of cognitively impaired genius - like Rainman.

[jesse.in.mb]

If #2 is real was otrtm talking to Cytotoxic?

[GILMORE]

I'm going with #2.

This is masterfully done, BTW

[Rufus J. Firefly]

2.

[Irish]

We get the best trolls. That's probably because half of them are fake and they're just regulars fucking with us though.

No one will ever convince me that Craiginmass is a real person. I just refuse to believe that anyone seriously thinks we would all have died in traffic accidents if it weren't for Ralph Nader.

[Heroic Mulatto]

You actually haven't been to MA, have you?

[jesse.in.mb]

I laughed, but mostly because I will never drive in the greater Boston area ever again.

[Sudden]

In craiginmass' defense, if I had to routinely navigate the roads of Massachusetts, I'd be convinced death lurked around the corner on a daily basis.

[GILMORE]

Actually, that one's real AFAIK.

OTRTM is too weird to live, but craig is garden variety libtarded.

[Irish]

OTRTM will also periodically say something rational, which makes me think it's a regular who sometimes forgets to switch off his fake handle.

[Irish]

Also, 2.

[Irish]

My favorite part of On the Road to Mandalay is that he randomly insulted people from the very beginning and dissolved into teary eyed vulgarity when challenged, but then claims he's only an asshole because we somehow forced him into it.

[Ted S.]

Last night I dreamt I went to Mandalay. You can never go back to Mandalay.

[MJGreen]

I'm gonna say 2. The dash feels out of place in a Mandalay tantrum.

[Derpetologist]

Damn, swing and a miss. It was #2.

I got the libber-tarry-tardian bit from an obnoxious prog mod on another forum I used to frequent.

[Sevo]

Really good. You only left out 'find your own evidence, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you!'

[GILMORE]

ITS THE WIZARD!! HE'S GOING TO TURN PRINCESS KENNEDY INTO A HORSE NOW!!

[Francisco d'Anconia]

There you have it. It's all about safety.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

I already asked this, but doesn't NY state already have an anti-mask law?

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Me not sure Ke-mo sah-bee.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Found it...

"A person is guilty of loitering when he: ...4. Being masked or in any manner disguised by unusual or unnatural attire or facial alteration, loiters, remains or congregates in a public place with other persons so masked or disguised, or knowingly permits or aids persons so masked or disguised to congregate in a public place; except that such conduct is not unlawful when it occurs in connection with a masquerade party or like entertainment if, when such entertainment is held in a city which has promulgated regulations in connection with such affairs, permission is first obtained from the police or other appropriate authorities..."

http://codes.lp.findlaw.com/ny.....240/240.35

[Reek]

No Emmy nominations at all for Hannibal??!

Not saying it's the greatest show, but it's better than it has any business being. Madsen as Lecter and the guy who plays Will Graham both put in performances equal to Cranston in Breaking Bad or Spacey in HOC, and I say that as huge fans of those shows

[Ted S.]

Hasdrubal was better.

[seguin]

I'm a Hamilcar guy myself.

[NebulousFocus]

Agreed. Visuals and sound are also way above average.

[GILMORE]

Its guys like this that make me say to myself, "Politicians truly represent the best among us", evoking the ideal of the Philosopher King

[Heroic Mulatto]

It's very high-concept. He dressed as a ringmaster to represent his disgust at the circus media has become.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Just what society needs. More licensing.

[GILMORE]

What did he just say? we're going to ask the Pedophiles for ID?

[Trouser-Pod]

Ooooh, that privilege!

[GILMORE]

OOOOooohhhh. He's saying you can't dress up as a "bad Characters".

So no "Big Bad Wolf".

Or 'politicians'

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Wow, that sounds awesome!

[GILMORE]

That was the most retarded thing since they had a ferret on the show.

[Trouser-Pod]

....That wasn't the ferret??

[GILMORE]

It was the ferret after Princess Kennedy used the wrong Magic Wand on it.

[Trouser-Pod]

Shoulda used a Pocket Hose Wand.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

My kid was terrified and kept running from Frosty at Santa's Village in upstate NY a few years back.

Honestly, I couldn't blame her. Fucking thing was creepy and dirty.

[Lady Bertrum]

Fucking thing was creepy and dirty.

Are still talking about Mathew McConaughey?

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Come to think of it, it could have been him.

[jesse.in.mb]

Are still talking about Mathew McConaughey?

Always.

[Heroic Mulatto]

I humbly submit that if your 5-year-old earnestly believes that any of the ghetto-ass costumed freaks in Times Square are the original character, then your 5-year-old is a drooling idiot only deserving of euthanasia.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

I just gotta sign up for one of your classes.

[GILMORE]

HEY! There are some genuine Original Characters up in that piece

[Heroic Mulatto]

I was hoping that would have been Anti-Semitic Elmo.

I got the next best thing.

[GILMORE]

Bolivia = "Seriously, we somehow produced a trillion$ of Cocaine over the last 3 decades, but everyone's still poor. We blame Capitalism!"

[Sevo]

Damn free market!

[See Double You]

May we have poll of what Millennials think of polling Millennials?

[Heroic Mulatto]

I believe you can find Millennials poleing Millennials on Youporn, quite easily.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

If a diamond or salt mine opened up around my house I'd send my kid. It's always nice to have more income.

No?

Too soon?

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Ah, Lou Dobbs.

Someone has to step in for FOE.

[GILMORE]

This kid has wasted his youth by impersonating an older person

[GILMORE]

He's boring before his time

[GILMORE]

This kid is so lame i want to cry.

"Was he black?"

[GILMORE]

Michael Malice is *hetero*?

Jeez, that's a shocker.

[jesse.in.mb]

I wasn't going to say anything, but yes. I'm surprised.

[jesse.in.mb]

Oh right, it was the earlier Joan Collins reference that really sold it for me.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Wouldn't a prominent person getting arrested for acting up on a plane have made the news?

[Notorious G.K.C.]

You are shocked into silence by my naivete.

[GILMORE]

I can't believe NO ONE had any follow up to the Orange-Suited Politician/Wizard-Person who was trying to be serious about the costume-people in Times Sq being effectively 'pedophile screened' by the NYC Police.

There were like 12 dimensions of fucked-up there.

[Trouser-Pod]

I accused him of being a ferret...

/toes the dirt dejectedly

[Heroic Mulatto]

I think anything anyone could have said would have been superfluous.

[Brett L]

Why do you think he was beating on the "masks" part so much. Totally using his position to make it okay to wear... that... without getting arrested.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Any politician more high-profile than him won't want to appear on TI unless (a) the hosts are going to agree with him or (b) the politician is trying to sell a book.

[GILMORE]

Guys, I meant "no follow up" by the *indys*

but I think maybe HM is right. It was
'unspeakable'. In fact, its possible they will pretend that segment never actually happened.

[Derpetologist]

Who's up for some Tulpa?

1. Oh, insults is it? Is that how you always react when confronted with facts and logic you can't refute? Go on, throw your tantrum, you inept fool. It just go to show what fanatics like you will do to squelch a dissenting opinion. The groupthink on this forum is beyond the pale. The SugarPissWart fan club is outraged!

2. Fact is, if Stand Your Ground weren't law this guy would have been convicted. It would be hard to convince a jury, even to the point of inducing reasonable doubt, that he had no opportunity to retreat from a FLEEING vehicle. This is why SYG laws are a bad idea in practice, even if the principle is appealing. It offers an easier opportunity for people who commit murder to falsely claim self-defense, while not really affording any benefit to people who truly are forced to act in self-defense.

3. In this case it is mumbo jumbo, since he's using a bit of jargon from his specialty, that few will be in a position to question, to paper over a significant problem with his position. It would be like me saying that Red Light Cameras are not a threat to freedom because they use Sobolev Spaces and Hermite Elements. Nobody here is qualified to dispute that because they don't know what the hell I'm talking about.

[jesse.in.mb]

I'm gonna say 3. I have no basis for that other than beer-soaked gut feeling.

[Heroic Mulatto]

I remember #3 was written to me. So no.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

2.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Let me ask Mr. Six-Sided Die:

1

[Aloysious]

#3

...they don't know what the hell I'm talking about.

Just guessing.

[Irish]

In this case it is mumbo jumbo, since he's using a bit of jargon from his specialty, that few will be in a position to question, to paper over a significant problem with his position. It would be like me saying that Red Light Cameras are not a threat to freedom because they use Sobolev Spaces and Hermite Elements. Nobody here is qualified to dispute that because they don't know what the hell I'm talking about.

Holy fuck, this is hilarious, and it's also clearly Tulpa.

Oh, insults is it? Is that how you always react when confronted with facts and logic you can't refute? Go on, throw your tantrum, you inept fool. It just go to show what fanatics like you will do to squelch a dissenting opinion. The groupthink on this forum is beyond the pale. The SugarPissWart fan club is outraged!

This is fake.

[tarran]

It needs more quarter-assed Socratic questioning.

[Irish]

Sometimes I forget why people hated Tulpa. Then I see something like this.

[GILMORE]

I'll go with 1

[GILMORE]

I don't think he'd do too many 'compoundwords'. He takes himself too seriously

(which is why i'm still pretty sure Bo is Tupla)

[SIV]

Occam's razor says there can't be two of them.

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

Uno.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

1

[Cytotoxic]

It's #1. Not sophist enough.

[Derpetologist]

I, fooled a few that time. It was #1.

Isn't this fun?

[Notorious G.K.C.]

I got it right, because that's how I roll!

[Rufus J. Firefly]

I don't know this guy enough. I barely read the crazy comments.

[MJGreen]

Trick question, the first is from Rollo.

[Sevo]

I haven't seen rollo in years! And that's fine.

[Derpetologist]

I can't believe you missed The Incident.

[Lady Bertrum]

Do you even lift, bitch?

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

That's, that's...really something. Wow.

[jesse.in.mb]

I read way more of that than necessary. I'll counsel my lady coworkers to run out and buy three.

[jesse.in.mb]

You should really post this in the AM Links. I seem to remember them being a pervier lot.

[Heroic Mulatto]

"The vagina is not meant to be pushed into," says D?silets, "it is meant to pull something into itself (as much as push something out [like a baby]). The "sipping" exercise in the Jade Egg practice helps you learn to activate the exquisite sensations of this area and to reconnect to that natural pulling in reflex.

Having been with a woman who could do that, I'm going to +1 everything written in that article.

[Antilles]

Good show, as always. But it disappoints me when my fellow Libertarians don't argue with me (beyond professional sports, that is). But that's OK because I always have the AlterNet to tell me what an stupid, ignorant and evil person I am. Best wishes, my Libertarian brothers (and sisters), but I'm off to indulge in some whisky and weed to make me feel better about the world. Cheers...

[Christophe]

If you stick around more, eventually the trolls will engage you in inanity.

Or join us on our twice-weekly abortion/immigration threads.

[Antilles]

Sorry, but that doesn't sound very fun. I prefer expressing my honest opinion and watching people go crazy that I dare to believe something that is contrary to what 'those' people believe. Interpret that as you wish...lol.

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

So I'm definitely going to really hate this new job. But I hate it even more because agreeing to start it this week is making it difficult to interview for a much better paying job.

[jesse.in.mb]

Is there anything else you're excited about regarding this much better paying job?

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

It won't make me want to pound my head into the desk as I stand for two hours faxing verification reports to health clinics through the USA?

[jesse.in.mb]

Is this not the out of state one then?

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

No, it's the Bank of America job in Phoenix. I was just being coy.

I've had a lot of bad timing this past week: I apply for a used car loan, get this job offer, quit my temp job, and then get the BofA interview request.

Rearrange that sequence of events and I'm not riding an hour on packed OCTA bus home today.

But at least I got an interview slotted for Friday morning at 9:30.

[jesse.in.mb]

Ha. Will you be able to get me a chippy card for my BofA line of credit?

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

I have no idea what a chippy card is so you can keep asking Kara about it.

[jesse.in.mb]

EMV "smart chip" cards are the norm in Europe. BofA tried to roll them out in the mid-2000s, but there were no EMV capable terminals and they cut the program. After the Target thing there's been a push to roll them out again.

The Irish were really annoyed any time they'd see I had a plain mag-stripe card.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

My little brother's best friend works for BofA. He works even less than government employees. He gets sick leave, vacation, and personal days. Personal days are when you don't need to show up, or notify your bosses that you aren't showing up. Oh, and he got 6 months of paid paternity leave.

In case you're wondering, I sold my stock in BofA years ago. I stand by my decision.

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

I had no idea that was the case. I'm just attracted to the $14 an hour starting out and spending weekends with my girlfriend.

[GILMORE]

People still use *faxes*?

Jesus, I worked in a biz requiring lots of signature transfers... and even that stopped faxing like 5 years ago.

[jesse.in.mb]

Faxes are HIPAA compliant. Email kind of, might be, sometimes, but not really. Which stops exactly zero people from using email internally, but all inter-office stuff is done by fax, or increasingly encrypted cloud storage (which also may or may not be HIPAA compliant).

[GILMORE]

right.

So its perfectly legal to approve transfers of *millions of dollars* between banks without 'fax machines'... but because of HIPAA, anybody in the health business has to retain 'fax machines'... even though scanning and emailing is functionally identical... because 'law'.

I actually sort of think i knew this in the back of my brain, because a dude in my office did lots of group-health plan brokering... but... still.

i have seen like 9 different levels of government compliance regulation, and i still never cease to be amazed at the scale of its uselessness.

[jesse.in.mb]

Actually, scanning and emailing is better than functionally identical: PDF files can be encrypted, email recipients can be named personally, and emails have to be manually logged into. You message is sent person to person and is only retrieved when it needs to be instead of just sitting in a tray behind the front desk.

[GILMORE]

(sobs)

[Cytotoxic]

You guys better make Shapiro suffer.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

He went on record supporting open borders and opposing the welfare state. Hard to argue with that.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Happy Birthday, William Shatner! No, wait...

"Preserving Tradition, a Ham Celebrates Its 112th Birthday

"The Isle of Wight County Museum in Smithfield, Va., Is Throwing a Party for What It Calls the World's Oldest Edible Cured Ham...

"[Curator Tracey] Neikirk finally found a company to make a case that would keep the ham, and two others that are stored alongside it, free from bugs or mold. Trays of silica absorb moisture, and Ms. Neikirk says she cleans the case once a year to prevent a smoky residue from building....

""You could probably still eat the darn thing," said Henrietta Gwaltney, granddaughter of P.D. Gwaltney Jr., the ham's former owner. The late Mr. Gwaltney referred to the ham as his pet and used it for years as a marketing tool for his Gwaltney meat company, outfitting it with a collar and leash to show off to potential ham buyers."

http://online.wsj.com/articles.....1405132429

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Game Of Thrones- 55 Photos Of The Cast Like You've Never Seen Them Before

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

Tywin Lannister reads from '50 Shades of Grey'

[MJGreen]

The man is a treasure.

[jesse.in.mb]

The designer of that site should be shot. My screen is at 1920x1080 and I still had to scroll AFTER EVERY CLICK so I could see the next photo.

DIAF luckymag.com site designer. I will not scroll repeatedly even if shit like this is in your slideshow.

/Ted S.

[Carl is dead inside]

My screen is at 1920x1080

2048 x 1152, fookin pleb

[Emmerson Biggins]

ditto

[Francisco d'Anconia]

So Sophie Turner is now 18. Will they or won't they?

[Heroic Mulatto]

Dear Producers of the Independents,

We need to have a heart-to-heart concerning the after-show. The entertainment value of Guy's travel stories is the equivalent of listening to your 7 year old ramble on as he tells his first shaggy-dog joke. That is, none at all. The after-show has, for the most part, out lived its usefulness; furthermore, as the collected audience of the feed numbers in the low thirties, I suggest the following: At the end of every episode, Kennedy, Matt, Kmele, the guests, and the crew perform a Soul Train-style line dance. Imagine the look of utter abandon upon Matt's face as he would awkwardly shuffle down the line while arrhythmically jutting his hips out. It would provide Kmele the opportunity to show that his musical tastes aren't as stereotypically bad as he implies during the broadcast. Kennedy would finally have an excuse to wear Afro-Puffs.

There is no downside to this.

Sincerely,

Heroic Mulatto

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Did somebody say 'tits?"

Tits!

[Francisco d'Anconia]

They still have an aftershow? Mine hasn't worked in a month. Fixing my problem is a high priority.

[Sevo]

HM, AFAIK, the value of TI is that it gives folks a chance to chat here.
GILMORE suggested it's a paying operation a couple of weeks back and maybe there is an audience to make it so; suffice to say I have doubts.

[GILMORE]

I think the aftershow is a sop to their 'internet only' audience of which i think there are more than a few (raises hand) ..

... and for the record, i like it. half the time. Which is pretty good, considering.

[Sevo]

"and for the record, i like it. half the time. Which is pretty good, considering."

Yeah, but you do the "weather report", so there's a bit of a draw for you that others don't have.

[Derpetologist]

We're closing in on the grand finale. But first- SHREEK!

1. I scored higher on the LP purity test than most of the posters here, you cocksucking Bushpig lover.

2. Fuck you christfag paultards I'm done posting here.

3. Typical pussy conservative. I am a liberal and I would start with the Medicare doc fix - kill it.

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

I feel like this is a trick one. We know he's threatened to stop posting here before but perhaps he's never tossed in a 'Paultard'.

So I'm going to go with 2.

[Sevo]

"he's never tossed in a 'Paultard'."

Pretty sure the turd has done so.

[jesse.in.mb]

Three

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Once again, I had to consult my sources...

According to my cubic-shaped source, the answer is

1

[GILMORE]

i suspect this is a trick, and its #1.

[GILMORE]

the 'trick' being, Dr.Derp has taken *the most common thing* Shrike says... and mildly altered it.

brilliant! and *insidious*

[Sudden]

I'm guessing you intended one of those to be a spoof but accidentally ended up quoting him verbatim in the proposed spoof comment.

[Derpetologist]

Sir, I must protest. I would never do such an underhanded thing.

[GILMORE]

but does he really cop to being 'liberal'?

I always thought he claimed to be 'the realest libertarian', but just as a joke.

[Derpetologist]

Ha! Got most of you that time. It was #1.

Be sure not to miss tonight's final installment:

White Indian AKA Mary Stack

Keep in mind there is a strong chance she is reading now. She quoted me on her stupid Google+ page the other day.

[GILMORE]

AHA!!

So was i right? you just added "bushpig lover" to a cliche Buttplugism

[GILMORE]

""She quoted me on her stupid Google+ page the other day.""

....

...and you know this... ...?

no, i dont want to know.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

I'll point out I got two right answers by rolling a d6.

[GILMORE]

there's only 3 answers?? What you roll again when its "5"?

[Notorious G.K.C.]

What is this, remedial D&D?

1-2 is 1

3-4 is 2

5-6 is 3

[Sudden]

You could've used a 20 sided dice if Vatican II didn't proclaim it an abomination of the occult.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

No, Jack Chick said that, but he said the same about us.

And playing D&D is correlated with chastity.

[Sudden]

Until it became Advanced Dungeons & Dragons.

You know nothing, Jon Snow

[jesse.in.mb]

Leviticus 19:26b

Do not practice divination or seek omens.

Do you even adhere to Mosaic law, bro?

[Notorious G.K.C.]

I don't think *guessing* is the same as divination.

Unless Gygax pre-cursed all the dice he sold.

[jesse.in.mb]

Wouldn't finding answers by casting lots be a form of divination?

Unless of course you're d6 is the divinely blessed Urim and Thummim and you're a high priest of Yahweh.

[Sudden]

Look, jesse, if your character is a cleric high in both intelligence and constitution it can practice divination in the advancement of Christ and because of its high constitution it would only need to worry about roll higher than a 3 on a d20 in order to avoid being converted to paganism and higher than a 5 to avoid be converted to sodomite.

Your DM seriously doesn't explain these things very well, eh?

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

Really? Because there are multiple examples in the Bible of people casting lots to leave a decision up to God.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Acts 1:15-26

[jesse.in.mb]

I'm a bit rusty, but the priests could query God using the Urim and Thummim, but it was frowned upon when done by non-priests.

Deuteronomy 18:10

10 Let no one be found among you who sacrifices their son or daughter in the fire, who practices divination or sorcery, interprets omens, engages in witchcraft,

Lots were also used to randomize, such as distributing Jesus' stuff at the crucifixions. It'd be like us pulling straws. I'm not sure why that was acceptable, but not finding answers.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Historically - to move a bit away from pure theology - I know that starting in the 11th century, the reformers of the "Papal Revolution" helped get Europeans away from the old judicial methods of trial by ordeal and other lot-like decisionmaking, in favor of regular trials and rules of evidence.

[jesse.in.mb]

I'm honestly not sure about the difference between leaving things up to fate, asking for God's guidance through signs and outright divination.

I make a lot of decisions by arbitrarily choosing one thing over another, sometimes I'll flip a coin to do that. Is the difference whether I'm "breaking a tie" or wondering "which will be the better outcome"?

[Sudden]

I still believe in trial by combat. And should I ever be forced to go that route, I'm opting for Mad Scientist to be my champion. He seems well armed enough to take care of whatever foe he's up against and reminds me keenly of Bronn from GoT.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Very good issues - if I'd known I would be having a theological discussion I would have come better prepared!

But here is what I found in my Catechism:

"Divination and magic

"2115 God can reveal the future to his prophets or to other saints. Still, a sound Christian attitude consists in putting oneself confidently into the hands of Providence for whatever concerns the future, and giving up all unhealthy curiosity about it. Improvidence, however, can constitute a lack of responsibility.

"2116 All forms of divination are to be rejected: recourse to Satan or demons, conjuring up the dead or other practices falsely supposed to "unveil" the future.48 Consulting horoscopes, astrology, palm reading, interpretation of omens and lots, the phenomena of clairvoyance, and recourse to mediums all conceal a desire for power over time, history, and, in the last analysis, other human beings, as well as a wish to conciliate hidden powers. They contradict the honor, respect, and loving fear that we owe to God alone.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

"2117 All practices of magic or sorcery, by which one attempts to tame occult powers, so as to place them at one's service and have a supernatural power over others - even if this were for the sake of restoring their health - are gravely contrary to the virtue of religion. These practices are even more to be condemned when accompanied by the intention of harming someone, or when they have recourse to the intervention of demons. Wearing charms is also reprehensible. Spiritism often implies divination or magical practices; the Church for her part warns the faithful against it. Recourse to so-called traditional cures does not justify either the invocation of evil powers or the exploitation of another's credulity."

http://www.vatican.va/archive/.....s2c1a1.htm

[jesse.in.mb]

Ok, so casting lots is frowned on.

Wearing charms is also reprehensible

Does the way some people treat saint medallions fall under this, or does that get a pass as a meditative focal point.

I'm always interested in where the lines are in Catholicism. I'm fairly certain that a lot of what I learned as a youth was as much half-remembered bias as actual information.

[Sudden]

Jesus fulfilled the ancient Hebrew law and therefore rendered all the bizarre edicts of the Old Testament obsolete.

That's what my evangelical pastor friend says, at least. Not sure how that fits with GKC's Catholic orthodoxy.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

It's kind of complicated, but basically Christ *fulfilled* the Old Testament prophecies.

But there are plenty of priests, etc. who would be happy to talk to you, not to mention the Catechism - it's my view that this would be more fruitful than asking some guy on the Internet, even someone as wonderful as me.

http://www.vatican.va/archive/ENG0015/_INDEX.HTM

[Francisco d'Anconia]

3

[Notorious G.K.C.]

A Julie Borowski video!

And you'll *love* the topic!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bNH-0HKZu_U

[Heroic Mulatto]

I still say she had crazy eyes.

[Heroic Mulatto]

*has

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

And is that a bad thing?

[GILMORE]

She does.

I'd hit it.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

I'd throw her a bone.

[Sevo]

OK, London to Edinburgh; no planned stops between. Car rental or train? (car's cheaper, BTW, so it has the immediate advantage)

[Sudden]

Car is cheaper in cost of rental, but when factoring in the cost of petrol may run more.

Still, I'd say go car. It's funny driving on the wrong side of the road, plus you may find yourself compelled to stop along the way.

Also, while you're in Scotland, I highly recommend visiting Inverary, even though its a far off three to four hour drive from Edinburgh.

[Sevo]

"I highly recommend visiting Inverary,"

I will check it out.

[Sevo]

Just checked the maps; why do you recommend it?

[Sudden]

Natural beauty with the loch right there along the town's edge. When I was there there was a music festival at the George Hotel and being a yank I was actually exotic in that particular spot since its not a big international tourist destination (although a lot of English will come up for a holiday weekend there). Just a really beautiful drive and countryside. And the people were extremely friendly. A lot of Scots were generous to me while I was in other areas of Scotland, but I got more free drinks in one night in Inverary than the rest of my time in Scotland combined.

[Sevo]

Free drinks is always good!

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Are you going down to Liverpool?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hj3Fgdyr2k8

[Sudden]

Really, GKC? If you're gonna link to music when referencing Liverpool, At least make sure it comes from the best Liverpudlian band of all time.

Alternatively, This works, too

[Notorious G.K.C.]

I admit that BS is better than other Liverpool bands, but for some reason, I didn't feel like linking to a song whose lyrics include "my name is Lucifer, please take my hand."

At least you didn't link to that other, overrated Liverpool group.

[Sudden]

You could've chosen war pigs instead, or sweet leaf. Both of which would be entirely appropriate on a libertarian blog.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Numero uno, I wasn't aware that BS was from Liverpool.

Numero two-o, I wanted a song *about* a British city, not *by* someone from a British city.

And numero three-o, if you play the Bangles backwards, they pray to St. Michael the Archangel.

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

Why would you not link to the actual Bangles performing?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GkVAEoGQCko

As you can see, they've all seemed to have aged pretty well.

[Sudden]

Neither should be linked. He'll be traveling from London to Edinburgh, which means he'd only be going up to Liverpool.

[Sevo]

The Liverpudlians have yet to convince us of their attractions.
Prolly gonna grab a ferry to Ireland from south of there.

[Sudden]

Or if you take my suggestion, you could go to Inverary, take the ferry from Port Kennacraig to Port Ellen (on Islay, home of peaty scotch whisky) and then go from Port Ellen to Belfast.

[Sevo]

We're gonna pass on No. Ireland.
Yeah, it's prolly no problem, but...

[Sudden]

Well, when you go to Ireland (time permitting), I'd recommend going to Galway. Dublin is great, but you can get your fill of it in two days. Galway is a great city on the west coast.

I'm beginning to notice a trend. Something about west coasts really appeals to me.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q_-y8Bpy3KE

[Sudden]

The Irish are good at music.

[Sevo]

We do have some time there, so it's on the list.

[jesse.in.mb]

I stayed longer in Dublin than was necessary. Now I have to go back to see the rest of the island. Life is hard.

[Sudden]

Apparently Galway has an active gay scene for a relatively small city.

[Sevo]

jesse's prolly more interested than Mr or Ms Sevo.

[jesse.in.mb]

I was surprised Limerick had a bathhouse for such a small town. It was far away from the tattoo parlor I was at and I was there mid-day during the week, so I didn't go, but I found it surprising.

I'd do Galwegian again, although I think I'd be traveling around with the ginger Dubliner who took me out drinking the first night if I went back, so I might not have the chance.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

What do they call dirty poetry written on bathroom stalls in Limerick?

[Sudden]

How far the Catholics of that country have fallen.

[jesse.in.mb]

EvH: High literature, that place is just on the cusp of no longer being a pit. I had multiple Dubliners ask me if I had or was planning on acquiring a stab vest before I went.

Sudden: At least they aren't protestants like those from Amsterdam or Berlin. I'm an innocent compared to Berliners.

[Sudden]

I got asked for heroin on several occasions while in Dublin.

In Amsterdam, it was always people trying to sell me drugs.

No experience in Berlin yet. I figure I'll try Russia first so that nothing will surprise me ever again.

[jesse.in.mb]

I liked Berlin. I didn't find it shocking, but I didn't avail myself of everything it had to offer.

I highly recommend going when there will be fireworks, particularly Kreuzberg. It was like you picture a war zone to be without the death and completely cleaned up in 48 hours.

[Sudden]

Jesse, I'm planning a trip to Russia. Death and suffering are kinda my thing.

[jesse.in.mb]

Kinky.

Also, I've invited myself along on your Russia trip twice, but you've been quite drunk and at least the first time you didn't remember.

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

I remember watching an episode of Top Gear that had an Audi, a motorcycle, and a train race from London to Edinburgh.

The train got their first.

[fuck you tulpa]

Incorrect!

Tornado arrived 1 minute ahead of schedule at Waverley at 3:26 pm, having taken a total of 8 hours exactly.[6] On arrival Jeremy Clarkson and crew ran the short distance to the Balmoral Hotel.[2] However, he arrived to find that James May was already there, waiting for him with a pint. May said in his Daily Telegraph column after the race was broadcast that he had arrived "no more than 10 minutes" before the train.[13]

[fuck you tulpa]

And it was a jag.

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

Huh, well I watched on my lunch break at work a year or so ago so I'm just going from memory. For someone reason the TV was always set to BBC America.

[fuck you tulpa]

http://www.topgear.com/uk/videos/train-race-part-5

[GILMORE]

You could always get an Audi A8 and try to go there and back on one tank of gas....

crazy thought

[Sevo]

We had a diesel last time we were in Germany and the damn thing used every bit of speed the A-bahn offered before the next warning of road work or whatever it was.
Have you driven one of those? I'm assuming they'd use up road in a hurry.

[GILMORE]

No, not the A8, but i've been in an S8 (~2011) going about 150, and that thing had a tractor-engine on coke... its the same bi-turbo V8 that Audi makes for Bentley now to haul their Continental GT.... its got like 550-590lbs of torque, and low down... probably the most powerful production engines NOT either AMG or italian v12

[Sevo]

That's the sort of torque we'd want to find for gas-class drag engines! Dunno what you'd do with that on the street.
I didn't look but Audis are typically AWD, right?

[Derpetologist]

Well, here we go. Mary Stack.

1. Have you ever been to the Somalia? The place is vast, you can travel for days and not find taxes or government. If you want to avoid socialism, I will pay for your ticket, you keen?

2. I KNOW BUT DON'T CARE. IT IS A CONVENIENCE THING FOR ME. I ALWAYS WONDERED WHO DECIDED THAT RULE. I GUESS SOMEBODY WITH 20/20. HMM, DOES SMALL PRINT SUGGEST WHISPERING?

3. Fibertarian poodles hate taxes, but love government protection of property rights from the city-state. Officer, am I free to gambol about forest and plain?

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

Haha, I think everyone with Reasonable has your post automatically filtered because of all those trigger words.

Any-who, I'm going with 3.

[Sudden]

Reasonable, rendering trigger warnings obsolete since 2012.

[GILMORE]

I can only guess #1 because the other two are way too clearly indicative of her silly self absorbed psychosis, where #1 is actually just run of the mill "libertarians love somalia", and i always thought her thing was an anarchist thing where there is no property or borders blah blah.

God shes a dumb cunt.

So #1

[Francisco d'Anconia]

1

Somalia wasn't a "thing" when Mary had access.

[Derpetologist]

The answer will be revealed at midnight, Central Time.

[Derpetologist]

And now, the shocking conclusion of Spot the Not: H&R troll edition

It was #3

Thanks for playing and be sure to tune tomorrow for Spot the Not! Reason.com contributor edition.

Sheldon Richman AND Steve Chapman will be featured.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Does it count that I posted my guess before I refreshed to see your answer?

[MJGreen]

Grr, it's midnight eastern time. I was gonna say 3. 🙁

[Derpetologist]

I just realized I meant midnight eastern time. Oopsie.

[GILMORE]

ACH! 'twas the gambol that did me!

[Derpetologist]

You fell prey to one of the classic blunders.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

+1 land war in Asia

[Notorious G.K.C.]

To avoid theological problems, I'll try and figure this out myself.

2 sounds like her, and more important, not like something you'd make up.

3 obviously uses some of her language, but it may be a trick - it may be a mashup of other posts rather than an authentic post of hers.

1 is the sanest-sounding post, but your made-up post would probably be deliberately crazy.

So I will say

3

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Talk Nerdy To Me

[Carl is dead inside]

meh...

The girl in the mom jorts is hot though.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Gross.

[Carl is dead inside]

Well, that would be in spite of the mom jorts and sandals. Especially the sandals.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

My testosterone is equal opportunity (no homo). If we're talking Asian girls in youtube videos, I vote Gangnam Style.

[Sudden]

BS, you like the dude with the green shirt and cowboy hat

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Like him? I'm the white version of that dude, but with better underwear.

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

Neither should be linked. He'll be traveling from London to Edinburgh, which means he'd only be going up to Liverpool.

I think this should always be linked:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7zzGQJHZ0Qk#t=43

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Did my comment at the top of the thread spur this?

Regardless, I'll be in my bunk!

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

In your bunk with the video her, or present day her?

[Francisco d'Anconia]

80s version.

She was a scrumpet.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

There were some, uhhhh, grooming issues back then.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

?

[Sudden]

Dat hair yo

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

80's bush. You can practically see the hairball in her panties.

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

So you guys blame Bush too?

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

It's not Bush' fault, but Bush needs to go.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

80s bush? You mean the tight little landing strip?

Ever see 70s porn?

P-lease!

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

I think you're confusing the 80's with the early 90's. I might have the Playboys somewhere to back up my argument.

Also,
TIWTANFL

[Sudden]

I can testify that 80's bush was just as bad.

Sources: That one time I went searching through a duffle bag in my parents closet in December hoping to find Christmas presents, and the time that my upstairs neighbor gave me a massive collection of Playboy and Penthouse magazines dating from 1985 - 1993.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

I think you misremember.

The 80s were the decade of the neatly trimmed. While not shaved, it wasn't the Neanderthal 70s.

I prefer a little fuzzy over prickly.

[jesse.in.mb]

We group-watched Debbie Does Dallas (1978) in college. It's the most I've heard the phrase "I think I might be gay for a while" in any given night.

[Sudden]

For some reason, I felt the need to link to this

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

You could do much worse than 55 year old Hoffs today

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

I like what wikipedia says about her. Jew, went to Pali High and UC Berkeley, married to a dude who studied economics etc etc.

I don't do menopause, though.

[Sudden]

You have a type.

Perhaps I need to consider the chosen variants of Persia at some point myself. Because I hate myself that much.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

If I were you, I would go South American. That's what I used to do. You might not get the political debate that you want, but you'll be.... What's the word I'm looking for?!?

Happy.

[Sudden]

I've generally found that Chilean women here are anti-communist. And fucking hot beyond all belief.

I dated this one Argentinean Armenian chick shortly after my divorce. Apparently Argentina has a big Armenian population I never knew about. She was gorgeous, but in spite of being both Argentinean and Armenian, was lighter skinned than I am. Kinda confusing.

[Derpetologist]

The term "Caucasian" was coined by a German anthropologist we decided that Armenians and other peoples of the Caucuses were the most beautiful white people.

[Sudden]

DONT YOU EVER BESMIRCH WHITE PEOPLE BY INCLUDING THE KARDASHIANS WITH US EVAR AGAIN!1!1!!1!!!

[Derpetologist]

*who decided

Freudian slip on my part, I guess.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Lots of German heritage in Argentina.

I like that they have no hangups about their bodies. You can spot the South Americans at the beach by the size of their bikinis. Even the heavy ones let it all hang out.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Argentineans are NOT dark skinned. I was surprised by this as well.

German influence? 😉

[Sudden]

I do nazi a correlation.

[Sidd Finch v2.01]

Argentinians are about 20% Amerindian with negligible African ancestry.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

97% European, and second lowest percentage of mestizo in the Americas (Costa Rica is 98% Euro).

[Sudden]

What about Uruguay? They always seem fairly light skinned to me.

[Sidd Finch v2.01]

Uruguay has some African (10%?) and negligible Amerindian.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Uruguay? IDK, for me, sample size n=1. She was hot.

[Sudden]

This whole subthread reeks of white male privilege.

I kinda love you guys.

[Sudden]

why not

[Ken Shultz]

Utah is amazing. I'm in Utah on a bike trip. In Zion headed to Moab later this week Polly. Utah's weird. There's freedom, but it's like Mormon freedom. You can ride without a helmet in Utah, but if you want to buy beer? You pretty much gotta buy it from the state. ...and beer is hard to find! I found it though--a whole lot of it. Had to ride 20 miles out of my way, but I found it. ...you magic underwear wearing' polygamy monkeys!

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Ken's been hacked. Change your passwords, people.

[Ken Shultz]

Check it out: everywhere in Utah that you CAN buy beer? You CAN'T buy a fuckin' bottle opener.

...but I got 'em open anyway, you caffeine aversion choir monkeys.

[Sidd Finch v2.01]

Perhaps this will be of some assistance.

[Ken Shultz]

I appreciate that. Thank you.

I got 'em open, at first with flathead screwdriver in the tool kit that came with my bike, and then I remembered some prep school skills and got 'em open with my belt buckle.

It's not as classy as some of the other suggestions, but it got the job done. And you know, it's a cruel world. Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do to get your beer open. And to a libertarian in this situation, with a bunch of beer and a state sanctioned bottle opener crisis, getting a bottle opened is a moral imperative.

[Sidd Finch v2.01]

Opening a bottle with a lighter-shaped object is a useful skill for free men in the event of emergency, major or minor. OTOH, opening a bottle with another bottle is only useful if you have a pressing desire for a certain class of lady (rhymes with some bunts).

[Knarf Yenrab!]

I recommend the Billy Jo Robidoux method, namely using your eye socket in place of the bottle opener.

The method works equally well with both twist-offs and lever-actions.

[Knarf Yenrab!]

Upon reflection, that would be the Joe Charboneau method. Getting my 80s scrubs mixed up.

[jesse.in.mb]

There are some fun brewers in SLC.

[Sevo]

Yeah, and you can drink it!

[Sevo]

Yeah, and you CAN'T drink it!
Sorry.

[Ken Shultz]

Oh, and for some reason? They won't sell you good beer cold. They'll sell you cold beer--but only like if it's Bud Lightbor something'. The good stuff you can only buy warm. You know what's his name's oatmeal beer? Awesome! ...but you can only buy it warm. If it's got any more alcohol content than Bud Light? They have to sell it warm.

You can buy slugs for your shotgun at Walmart, and if you marry seven 18 year old girls at the same time while not wearing a helmet as you're riding down the highway? Nobody gives a shot. ...but Brigham forbid you want some decent cold beer, you know?

[Derpetologist]

I went to Utah once. I was tempted to buy an "I *heart* Mormon pussy" t-shirt.

[Sudden]

I bet if you walk around wearing that, a bunch of really nice pale Aryan kids politely ask if you have any pictures of your cat you could show them.

[Derpetologist]

I'm embarrassed out how long it took me to get this joke.

Swearing is a almost a foreign language to me.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Did you go on a mission, or were you out by then?

[Derpetologist]

No mission for me- I was visting another Latter-Day Ain't friend who moved out there. I never even received the Aaronic priesthood.

I think I still have my CTR ring though.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

That's.... odd.

Like being a recovering alcoholic and taking a job as a bartender.

[Derpetologist]

I knew a guy like that in Chicago. I saw his necklace and asked him what the symbols were. He said he got it from AA for 10 years of sobriety. I asked him if working in bar tempted him. He said he built up his will-power.

I used to have the Mormon version of Where's Waldo, but I forgot where I put it.

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

I'm wary of the lack of context since it's only a 15 second clip, but Melissa Harris Perry sees validation of Nicaragua's socialist, re-distributive polices in light of the fact that there aren't many Nicaraguan children among the refugees at the border.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hF9Mkr2vhic

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

I don't see any North Koreans at the border either.

BTW, it isn't very easy to travel north from Nicaragua; the roads are shit. It's 10 times easier to get to Costa Rica, and that's still fucking difficult. It took me 2 days.

[Ken Shultz]

Yeah, I haven't come across any Mormon bank robbers yet either. So it must be the polygamy.

[Derpetologist]

This reminds me I need to do an MSNBC-themed round of Spot the Not! one of these days.

[Sudden]

Remember that when you do Ed Schultz, everything must be in all caps. You can also include director's notes like (frothing at the mouth) (going into convulsions) (potentially having a stroke).

[Francisco d'Anconia]

The's tho thmart.

[Sudden]

A derpbook prog friend posted something that suggested that all the Honduran kids were a direct result of the military coup in 2009. It never occurred that the human flood occurring five years after the coup (which was done at the behest of the president's own party after he tried re-writing the constitution to extend his term a la the Bolivaran influences of Castro and Chavez).

[Notorious G.K.C.]

I just heard on the radio that the Brazilian soccer team is looking for a new coach.

And I bet they're looking for the *old* one, too, because if he has any brains he will have scarpered.

[jesse.in.mb]

Did the Brazilians end up killing anyone over that? I was waiting for it and didn't hear anything other than the one fellow apologizing for failing.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

I couldn't find any stories about murder in a quick search.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

They're waiting for the tourists and the international media to leave first.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Prediction: Watching NOT live but after the fact.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

You go out tonight? I thought H&R was your life.

I am disappoint.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Like I can't watch and comment anywhere in the world. What is this, the 1990's?

[Fist of Etiquette]

The Shapiro interview seemed loving mostly but then at the end on the verge of moving to Attack Kennedy mode.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

500.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

500.

There we go.

[Sidd Finch v2.01]

shameless

[jesse.in.mb]

That's actually his middle name.

Pl?ya Sh?meless Manhattan.

[jesse.in.mb]

Damn. That's one of the better threads in a while. We seem to be barely breaking 300 since squirrelmageddon.

[Fist of Etiquette]

The goddamn Millennials poll rears its ubiquitous head. They treat the Millennials with kid gloves for being unaware. Like they're watching the show.

[Sidd Finch v2.01]

I have no idea what you're talking about and no idea whether I should be proud of that.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Yeah. Foster can't put himself into the no-shoes of hobos. Welch wants the government to cure smoking. Kennedy is talking.

Zombie baby.

Unprotected fist bumping.

Zombie shithouse.

[jesse.in.mb]

If you only click on one HuffPo "article" that's styled after buzzfeed, make it this one: Lonely Guy Turns His Shower Head Into A Girlfriend, Rest Of World Is Creeped Out

[Sidd Finch v2.01]

If there's one way America is just objectively better than the rest of the world, it's bathrooms and kitchens. (or 2 ways, whatevs)

[jesse.in.mb]

I liked my Korean bathroom. When it was dirty you just sprayed the whole thing down with bleach, watched tv for a bit and then came back and hosed it down with the shower head. Absentmindedly walking in with socks on mid-winter was the pits though.

European showers irredeemably suck. I should have enough space to bend over and wash my feet.

[Sidd Finch v2.01]

You can just spray any area with bleach. If you don't take the 2 minutes to wipe it up, at worst you'll have some chloramines that smell like a hotel pool. IME that isn't worth figuring out how to do sink stuff on a wet floor on a daily basis.

[Fist of Etiquette]

And now they're talking about regicide in Africa and the idea you have to be born a princess. Which is news to Padm? Amidala.

[Fist of Etiquette]

If you think there's a place for state child protection laws, then the natural end to that is out of control state agents arresting parents for any possible reason.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Spiderman, Spiderman, does whatever a Jew can...

[Fist of Etiquette]

I don't know what superhero this guy is supposed to be dressed up as.

[Fist of Etiquette]

So now Foster is trying to reason with a NYC councilman about the dangers of bureaucracy.

[Fist of Etiquette]

I have a feeling Foster is for child labor because that's where he gets those narrow ties that make his head look so big. Child sweatshop ties.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Uh, infomercial.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Are you going to belatedly live blog the whole show?

[jesse.in.mb]

Rain?

[Fist of Etiquette]

Well, it's done now, isn't it?

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

My wife just put on "Gang Related". I had no idea TV could get this bad.

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

Yeah, I remember my parents watching a few episodes. It spurred an unpleasant discussion about police militarization.

Also, the Vito Corleone, Mexican Godfather character is played a New Zealand Maori. Surprised that isn't more controversial. I guess appropriation only occurs when it is a white actor playing an ethnic character.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

We're not going to make it to "a few episodes". This is on the level of a high school play, written by high school kids.

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

I only watched because it has Terry O'Quinn in it, but even he is given an utterly bland role.

[Fist of Etiquette]

EDT last.

[RishJoMo]

Ride on over there dude, like for real. Wow.

http://www.AnonToolz.tk