Tonight on The Independents: Rise of the Machines! (Bumped)

Didn't get enough of Reason Managing Editor Katherine Mangu-Ward on Wednesday's episode of The Independents? Well, she's back tonight at 9 p.m. ET (6 p.m. PT, with repeats three hours later) on Fox Business Network, talking about–what else?–the Singularity.

That is because the weekly theme episode this time around is all about robots—smart machines that will (depending on who you talk to) liberate us from work, diagnose our strokes, drive our cars, modernize our economies, blow up our enemies, end humanity as we know it, or merely vacuum our houses while consoling us about the dwindling human race.

Kicking things off on a fearful note is James Barrat, author of new book Our Final Invention: Artificial Intelligence and the End of the Human Era, which Ron Bailey reviews here. Followed by George Mason University associate economics professor Robin Hanson, who is decidedly more upbeat. Brookings Institution scholar P.W. Singer, author of Cybersecurity and Cyberwar: What Everyone Needs to Know, will talk about robot sand-fleas; and Dr. Yulun Wang of InTouch Health will demonstrate his fancy diagnostic robot friend. Competitive Enterprise Institute Fellow Marc Scribner will talk about driverless cars, R Street Institute Senior Fellow Lori Sanders will talk about our jerbs, and the co-hosts will talk about their very favorite robots from audi-visual entertainment history.

Do you, for one, welcome your new robot overlords? I for one am not so sure, but the show will give you plenty of raw material to chew on either way. Remember: Follow the show on Facebook and Twitter, and go to this link for a playlist of previous segments. WEEKEND REPEATS: "Rise of the Machines" will re-air over the weekend at 7 p.m. ET (4 p.m. PT) both Saturday and Sunday. And at 2 a.m. this evening/morning, we will be repeating the Wednesday show featuring Rep. Justin Amash (D-Mich.), documentarian Errol Morris, Katherine Mangu-Ward, and TV's Andy Levy from Red Eye (which you can then watch at 3 a.m. on the big Fox).

Comments

[Snark Plissken]

Tell Robin Hanson I said the strong AI hypothesis is bullshit.

[Heroic Mulatto]

By “strong AI” do you mean that “the human mind is computational” or “one day we will construct an artificial intelligence that possesses ability equivalent or greater than human intelligence”?

[Snark Plissken]

I mean the idea that the human mind is an algorithmic machine, which is the standard definition of the strong AI hypothesis, famously put forth in Godel, Escher, Bach, and endlessly reiterated. Like Roger Penrose or Martin Gardener, I don’t attribute this to some mystical, ineffable characteristic of the human brain.

[Stormy Dragon]

Since the molecules that make up the brain behaving in an entirely deterministic way, so must the mind, unless you are going attribute it to some ineffable source independent of the physical matter making up the brain.

Otherwise, the algorithm simulating the interaction of those molecules would necessarily simulate the mind as well.

[Snark Plissken]

Get back to me when you have a true understanding of how the molecules in the brain interact to create self-awareness.

I’ve no idea why dumb-ass physicists have to use probabilities in quantum physics since those interactions are entirely deterministic just like an algorithmic digital computer.

[Stormy Dragon]

Those probabilities generally cancel out at macroscopic levels. Theoretically there’s quantum physics effects in a rubber ball too, yet we can generally treat it as a classical object for purposes of calculating it’s trajectory.

There’s no evidence whatsoever that neurons depend on quantum mechanical effects to function.

Also, understanding why an algorithm works is no necessary for it to work. The Strong AI hypothesis only addresses whether machine intelligence is possible, not whether we will necessarily understand why a particular machine is intelligent. Indeed, while I think we will one day create machines with human level intelligence, I suspect they will be just as mysterious as our own minds are.

[Snark Plissken]

The Strong AI hypothesis only addresses whether machine intelligence is possible, not whether we will necessarily understand why a particular machine is intelligent.

No, this is simply not true. It specifically posits the brain as an algorithmic machine. Hofstadter used the analogy of putting Einstein’s brain in a book. This is the strong AI hypothesis in a nutshell.

There’s no evidence whatsoever that neurons depend on quantum mechanical effects to function.

Which is not evidence that they don’t given our current knowledge. What there’s very strong evidence for is Penrose’s prediction back in 1990 that AI with present technology was BS. This has been born out through 25 years of huge technological change with computers being no more intelligent or self-aware than they were back then. During all this time, the AI gurus have been consistently saying it’s just around the corner. My money is on Penrose.

The idea that you just need to add a few more transistors and voil? artificial intelligence his been shown to be a sham.

[Stormy Dragon]

Penrose’s prediction was complete BS, and is typical of what happens when a cosmologist starts speculating about fields he has no background. He posits a behavior to microtubules that there is no evidence to suggest they exhibit that depends on a heretofore unknown type of particle that we have no evidence actually exists. The whole thing is just a really wordy way of going “oooo, magic!”

And contra your lie, there is not evidence, strong or otherwise, for any of it. It’s complete speculation.

[Snark Plissken]

I guess you are admitting that you were wrong about what the strong AI hypothesis actually consists of by ignoring that part.

Yes, at this point it is all speculation, much like AGW. Penrose speculated on what deeper effects might be in play in the human brain. He made it very clear that this was speculation. He also made it very clear that he didn’t believe there was some mystical force at work.

The fact is Penrose’s predictions about the future of AI back in 1990 have held up much better than the strong AI factions of the same era, or today. Again, my money is on Penrose.

[Stormy Dragon]

That’s like arguing that the lack of commercial fusion reactors proves nuclear physics is wrong.

[Snark Plissken]

An analogy of shriek-level dishonesty and petulance.

[Fluffy]

That’s like arguing that the lack of commercial fusion reactors proves nuclear physics is wrong.

This is a really terrible analogy. We know how hydrogen atoms fuse and release energy. We’ve achieved such fusion in practice in hundreds of nuclear tests. We could undertake a practical demonstration of our knowledge over the cities of the world in the next 30 minutes, if we chose.

We have absolutely no idea how consciousness works. None. We know less about how consciousness works than cavemen knew about the sun.

For all we know, every last action undertaken by AI technologists in the last 50 years was a total dead end and blind alley. We fundamentally don’t know what we’re trying to duplicate, and that makes duplication impossible.

If a biologist runs up to me in an excited lather and tells me he just grew some cells that organized themselves into an information system and achieved consciousness, I’d at least give him a hearing, since we already know that consciousness can arise from biology. We don’t really know that yet about silicon and won’t know it until it’s actually achieved.

[Stormy Dragon]

He also made it very clear that he didn’t believe there was some mystical force at work.

I know. I had to sit there and listen to him blither about it for three whole hours when I was an undergrad at Penn State. The problem is that what he was proposing WAS a mystical force dressed on pseudo-scientific trappings.

Penrose hasn’t don’t any really significant research in more than a decade now, largely because he’s increasingly focused on just making stuff up to suit his personal aesthetics rather than doing actual science.

[Snark Plissken]

Funny, Tulpa said something similar when I argued with him about this subject a few years back.

[Stormy Dragon]

A lot of people have said something similar. It’s part of why Penrose has been reduced to doing roadshows with quacks like Depak Choprah. Real scientists don’t want anything to do with him any more.

[Stormy Dragon]

PS – Even if the effect proposed by Penrose existed, it’s been shown that a neuron can’t maintain coherence long enough for it to have any effect on whether it fires or not:

http://arxiv.org/PS_cache/quan…..7009v2.pdf

[Snark Plissken]

No Tulpa said the exact same thing, that he’d seen Penrose in person, and he was pathetic, washed-up etc. Interesting.

The main point is that the strong AI hypothesis is BS, and has been shown to be so. You claimed

The Strong AI hypothesis only addresses whether machine intelligence is possible

Which is wrong. Perhaps you’d like to back that claim up? You can google like mad to try and assassinate Penrose but you are still dodging your idiotic claims about what the strong AI hypothesis is.

[Stormy Dragon]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Strong_AI

Arguing something with a particular property exists does not require producing a concrete example of it. I can, for example, prove that there is a prime number larger than the current largest known prime number even though I don’t know what that larger prime is.

[Snark Plissken]

You provide a link to nothing and some empty rhetoric to back up your empty claim (or dodge) as to what the strong AI hypothesis is? What the fuck do prime numbers have to do with the fact that the strong AI hypothesis posits that the brain is an algorithmic machine, like the digital computer?

You are really reaching now.

[PapayaSF]

There’s no evidence whatsoever that neurons depend on quantum mechanical effects to function.

Maybe not (yet), but it has been discovered that photosynthesis relies on quantum effects, so it’s not out of the question.

[neoteny]

Y’all ought to read Valentino Braitenberg’s book Vehicles: Experiments in Synthetic Psychology.

[Sevo]

I just scanned the reviews on Amazon; why do you think it applies to the arguments above?

[neoteny]

Well, it is hard to describe the argument in a comment, but basically it describes how deterministic computational elements can form ‘brains’ which display non-deterministic behavior — or at least behavior which can’t be predicted by outside observers.

Penrose wrote his book when proponents of AI were thinking in terms of centralized systems where a single executive process would do the ‘thinking’. That approach was doomed to failure (with the possible exceptions of very specialized expert systems, for example chess programs). But distributed AI was much more successful at solving some problems which generally aren’t thought as AI — the classic example for me being Boston Dynamic’s Big Dog.

Although some chess masters described some of Deep Blue’s moves as pointing to “true creativity”, IMO walking and seeing robots (cf. driverless cars) display much more intelligence — yet they’re obviously based on computations.

[Tim]

Star Trek teaches us that all AI is dangerous unless it is named Mr. Data (and he had his moments).

[Fist of Etiquette]

The M-5 seemed kind of nice.

[Tim]

M-5 was dumb, Landru: Dumb, Norman: dumb, Doomsday Machine: dumb, NOMAD cosmically dumb. V’GER : Dumb.
Did I miss any?

[Fist of Etiquette]

Lore?

[JeremyR]

Yeah, he wants to steal our women.

[Acosmist]

^^^^^^^

first comment is best comment

[Dave Krueger]

I am all for robots as long as their skin feels natural, they feel humanly warm, and their boobs aren’t unrealistically large.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Because large books would get in their way as they’re trying to do your homework?

You’re talking about homework-robots, right?

[Snark Plissken]

Anything beyond double D is a waste of silicon.

[Pro Libertate]

One would assume that sexbots would have adjustable bosoms.

[Bobarian]

Sexbot manufacturers would make this an option rather than a standard feature.

[PapayaSF]

“Anything over a mouthful is wasted.” ?200 Motels

[Calidissident]

… To each his own I guess

[Francisco d'Anconia]

So would the question of whether it’s sex or masturbation ride on whether it’s sentient or not?

Did Tasha have sex or was she just rubbing one out?

[Agammamon]

She had sex – Contrary to Dr Pulaski’s stance, Data *does* have sentience and self-awareness.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Yeah but Data wasn’t granted sentience until much later. As you well know, nothing really exists without government Starfleet approval.

[Agammamon]

No – his self-awareness and sentience and his rights as a *person* derived from those withstood legal challenge and were therefore ‘officially’ recognized (by Starfleet – *everything* is done by Starfleet in the Trek-Verse for some damn reason).

[sloopyinca]

I’d like to see a spinoff of the exploits of “Sonny” Clemmons.

[sloopyinca]

The bigger question is: was Tasha Yar the pitcher or the catcher?

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Well, he did say he was fully functional and programmed in multiple techniques.

[Warty]

DON’T DATE ROBOTS!

[Pro Libertate]

I saw part of some Showtime or HBO show where a space pilot had some robot “female” first mate who he kept fending off, then he finally succumbed. She wouldn’t let go of his sexual organ, and he got caught by his fiance, who was the daughter of some rich guy. He was punished somehow. Lots of nudity and violence, of course.

[Tim]

The Hangover part IV?

[Pro Libertate]

I think it was a series that was different every episode, like The Twilight Zone, except with the usual premium channel sex and violence. This must’ve been back in the 90s.

[Tim]

To think that with all the pervs here, nobody else remembers this…

[Pro Libertate]

I didn’t even watch the show, I just happened to catch about ten minutes. The robot was pretty attractive, which is probably why I sat and watched it in the first place.

[Warty]

I can’t believe SugarFree has not come by to tell us what show it was by now. What good is an archivist who won’t unarchive soft porn for us?

[Pro Libertate]

It’s making me crazy that I can’t remember and that SugarFree isn’t telling me. And even if he does, this thread is dead. I’ll never know!

[jesse.in.mb]

It’s the The Independents thread. It’ll be alive again at 9pmEST/6pmPST.

[Pro Libertate]

Well, if someone figures this one out, tell me.

[jesse.in.mb]

Perversions of Science – S01E03 – Boxed In

A space pilot has spent years in an eroding fighter with a female android. He has kept his promise to be faithful to his fiance named Dulcine who is also the daughter of an Admiral. When he finally gets to see her he notices that the Admiral has fitted her with an electronic chastity belt.

[Pro Libertate]

That’s it. I looked it up, and it also starred William Shatner, who directed the episode. Kevin Pollack is the pilot who gets in trouble with the sexbot.

[jesse.in.mb]

As long as my sex bot has a luxurious horse mane and tail and giant bullet ant mandibles I’ll be happy.

[kibby]

You’re not making the search for your Mister Right very easy on the rest of us with specifications like this.

[jesse.in.mb]

No kibby, the only thing this complicates is Mr. Right needs to be ok with me having a part horse, part stinging ant sex bot that speaks fluent Esperanto.

I will be perfectly tolerant of the deviant tastes in sex bots I expect him to have.

[PapayaSF]

Esperanto?? What a perv.

[Suthenboy]

It seems far more likely to me that machine and animal will merge rather than compete. Why would I want to turn into a blob of jelly while my robot cuts my grass when I could be running like Steve Austin and have easy access to the entirety of human knowledge and talent?

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Can’t it be both?

I want to run like Steve Austin AND have a robot cut my grass like an orphan.

[Agammamon]

Or neither – become a bodiless mind running on any variety of networked platforms. Choose and change bodies as you would clothes or tools when you need to directly interact with base reality, otherwise spend your time exploring n-dimensional spaces created in virtualities.

[Suthenboy]

Would all of these various bodies be equipped with monocles?

As I was typing that out it reminded me, I was reading a german’s account of what Berlin was like in the 1920’s and he mentioned that Berliners at the time commonly thought of Prussia as being entirely populated by retired generals wearing monocles.

I have no idea why I mention that.

[Swiss Servator, mehr Spr?ngli]

“I have no idea why I mention that.”

Because it was cool.

[Agammamon]

I don’t know about robots taking the place of orphans. Sure, they can do the *work, but a huge part of the orphans is the, you know, *orphan part*. Like the difference between a designer handbag and a knock-off – its the label that’s important.

[GILMORE]

Sometimes you just have to roll with the punches LOL

[Swiss Servator, mehr Spr?ngli]

You misspelled “jsut”

[GILMORE]

“Abort, Retry, Fail?”

[GILMORE]

Sounds like a plan to me dude.

[Agammamon]

Tonight on The Independents: Rise of the Machines!

The porn parody will have the same title.

[GILMORE]

There is a dude that knows what time it is. WOw.

[Agammamon]

Looks like GILMORE has already merged with the machine consciousness.

[jesse.in.mb]

Hasn’t anonbot said some vaguely kiddie-diddler things?

Should we worry about GILMORE?

[Suthenboy]

Not vaguely.

[Agammamon]

Nope, he chose his side in the coming war between man and machine.

Unless . . .

He’s actually infiltrating the machine collective to pass back intelligence.

But then this is a sort of ‘Mother Night’ situation where the only people who can verify his intentions won’t, to protect sources, and he’ll feel horrible about the atrocities he helped along while living as an agent among the machines and will kill himself with the truth never being known.

So either he’s the greatest hero mankind has ever had or our greatest traitor.

[sloopyinca]

He’s the future Edward Snowden?

[GILMORE]

I AM THE MODERN MAN

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3cShYbLkhBc

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Where you been, bro?

[Randy Oldgoat]

I saw a commercial for canned baked beans on television this afternoon that actually used the line “Roll that beautiful bean footage.” On a related note, club soda burns coming out one’s nose.

[GILMORE]

I find the Kosher seltzer less burn-y

[Soros' Wank-noose]

So, I take it Duke did, in fact, roll that footage…

[sloopyinca]

Dumping a boatload of money into AI is just crazy. The Sixers are still paying for that mistake.

[sloopyinca]

Robots? We talkin’ about robots?

-AI

[Swiss Servator, mehr Spr?ngli]

+1 practice

[BiMonSciFiCon]

Judging from the current product they put on the floor, adding old, alcoholic AI would still be an improvement.

[BiMonSciFiCon]

If you guys don’t play the robot clip from my namesake episode of the Simpsons, you’re missing out. Fox has to have those rights, right?

Now that I think about it, it might be a little too un-PC for national television.

[GILMORE]

– “WHY. WHY. WHY WAS I PROGRAMMED TO FEEL PAIN!?”

[BiMonSciFiCon]

That one’s good, too. I was thinking of the Battlestar Galactica vs. Star Wars scene. “I hate you! You’re so boring!”

[Derpetologist]

Historically, software lags hardware by a huge margin. We probably already have the hardware necessary for strong AI. The software is going to take a while.

Writing programs is really hard. An excellent programmer is 10 to 20 times more productive than a crappy one. I can’t think of any other job that is like that.

[Derpetologist]

Derp. The final frontier. These are the tales of a Derpetologist. His continuing mission: to explore strange, new fools. To seek out new morons and new half-wit imbeciles. To boldly sigh where no one has sighed before…

? ? ?

I had to revise a document because the format changed for the 3rd time in as many months. It has gone through about a dozen versions so far. Most of edits involve putting back in things I was told to remove. I was chastised for using the word “we” to refer to the company. I pointed out that the company homepage has the words “we”, “our”, and “us”. I declined to point out that the person who made this criticism does not know how to use apostrophes.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

You make Dilbert sound like he works for an enlightened, competent, understanding employer. Wow.

[Derpetologist]

The worst part is that of the 3 engineering jobs I’ve had, this is the best one.

I can walk to work, and that counts for a lot.

[Derpetologist]

The worst part is that of the 3 engineering jobs I’ve had, this is the best one.

I can walk to work, and that counts for a lot.

[mr lizard]

What’s worse? The job or the squrls?

Btw I understand your frustration. Although I know work for a power plant, and it’s still pretty Wild West/amateur hour territory. Also like it because any attempt at email formality makes me look like a rock star.

[Derpetologist]

When a true genius commenter appears, you will know him by this sign: all the squirrels are in a confederacy against him.

After I received a particularly poorly written email from a co-worker, I emailed an edited version back to him that used half as many words.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Have I mentioned that I like you?

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Seriously. You should get revenge on your employer by posting here more. I’m sure you know how to get around the firewall.

[Derpetologist]

I’d rather not play with fire by posting from work. I figure I get enough revenge by spending most of the day browsing Reason and Wikipedia.

A co-worker in production told me that one day, he brought a stop watch to work to measure how much time he actually worked in a 12-hour shift. I think it came out to a little over an hour.

The bane of my existence is that I must be present at the office for 8 hours per day even though I seldom have more than 2 hours of work to do.

[Derpetologist]

I’d rather not play with fire by posting from work. I figure I get enough revenge by spending most of the day browsing Reason and Wikipedia.

A co-worker in production told me that one day, he brought a stop watch to work to measure how much time he actually worked in a 12-hour shift. I think it came out to a little over an hour.

The bane of my existence is that I must be present at the office for 8 hours per day even though I seldom have more than 2 hours of work to do.

[GILMORE]

If there is no Mr Roboto in the segway music I will be very upset

[Agammamon]

You ride around on one of those mall-ninja-mobiles?

Or did you mean ‘segue’.

[PapayaSF]

You meant “segue,” unless it was a prediction that two-wheeled electric scooters would play music.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Look at all these comments already. Interesting that the episode apparently has been broadcasting since 3PM this afternoon.

[Episiarch]

“Ceci n’est pas une comment.”

[Rufus J. Firefly]

***Fumes***

Argh!

[Byte Me]

Derpetologist|3.28.14 @ 6:26PM|#

Historically, software lags hardware by a huge margin.

Speaking of software, I have a question for anyone that may use AutoCad Civil 3d, which is a software that is both awesome and the bane of my existence. My company recently switched to it, and it has some cool and useful functions, BUT the more these useful functions are implemented (surfaces, alignments, profiles, corridors, pipe networks, etc), the slower drawing files seem to get. Does anyone here know what settings might remedy this?

If it makes a difference, we use the 2013 version on brand new 64 bit, dell computers that have an obnoxious amount of ram running on windows 7.

[Derpetologist]

I had a job where I was supposed to use AutoCAD to draw stuff. There were only 4 licenses for the dozen or so engineers, so I hardly was ever able to run it.

I ended up doing drawings by hand and in MS Word.

I had no training in AutoCAD and besides, my degree is in chemical engineering.

Did my employers care? Nope.

[Byte Me]

It’s good that you didn’t have to use it. It’s frustrating as hell. I have been using it since taking drafting all through high school, and use it all day, every day at work. That said, I use it because I am a civil engineer in land development design. I can’t even imagine what a chemical engineer might use cad for.

[Agammamon]

Drawing dicks of course.

[PapayaSF]

I have no direct experience, but see this (and the following post) and this.

[Byte Me]

I have searched many forums, but your second link has new info. I’ll check it out tomorrow when I’m more sober.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Near full house in Mtl. for the Jays-Mets game.

Good. I smell a franchise. Cromartie is spearheading a group to bring the Expos back.

The strange thing is the Expos united both solitudes better than the Habs ever could. They didn’t have all the political and cultural baggage of the Canadiens.

As you were.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Think the Expos didn’t leave an impact on the city?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6mzDqrxaxvM

People were dancing in the crowd celebrating Carter.

[Bo Cara Esq.]

I do think MLB lost something with the Expos.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

In my view, a unique team in a unique city.

So, yeah.

Of course, I’m bias.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

I’m sad Thursday nights.

Is there a poster of TI so I can put it over my bed?

[Francisco d'Anconia]

We’ve asked Welch 3 times to repost the Stossel story on Thursday night, but he’s being a bitch.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

What type of bitch?

[Byte Me]

What type of bitch?

The kind that doesn’t put out.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Is there more than one type?

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Byte Me, just mentioned one.

[Episiarch]

Which type is your mom?

[Francisco d'Anconia]

The kind that gives it up.

[Episiarch]

Ah, so just like jesse’s mom.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

They’re both good.

[jesse.in.mb]

Episiarch’s theory of projection is really just projection!

Surely you mean your mom, no?

[Episiarch]

Surely you mean your mom, no?

I thought that went without saying.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

The one who would refuse to make home made ravioli because she was ‘sick.’

[Episiarch]

Homemade ravioli is a massive pain in the ass, like any fresh pasta. I don’t blame her.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Yeah, but the results can’t be argued with.

I taught my daughter to make linguine. Her grandmother will be swinging by to make some tortellini next week.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Recipe time before the show.

Bucatini pasta.
Olive oil
garlic
Pancetta (diced or sliced that you then chop up)
Red onion.
Peas.
Cream (optional)

Heaven.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

You’re ‘supposed’ to use a more supple pasta with that but I like it. Bucatini is great alla matriciana.

[PapayaSF]

Yum. I trust you are frying the pancetta first.

[jesse.in.mb]

the bossy kind?

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Hey, hey, hey…

Think of the psyche’s of young girls.

[Derpetologist]

psyches

I’m sorry. Apostrophes are a sore point with me lately.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Yep. I even stopped to look at it before hitting submit and I STILL fucked it up.

[Derpetologist]

It’s OK. about half the people at my job habitually use apostrophes for plurals- something which has never been standard practice in the entire history of English.

[Derpetologist]

It’s OK. about half the people at my job habitually use apostrophes for plurals- something which has never been standard practice in the entire history of English.

[jesse.in.mb]

Ha. My predecessor got it into his head that two digit years should be written 90′.

I had to hunt him down and smack him.

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

Look Matt, I know I’ve made some very poor decisions lately. But I can assure you, I am alright now. I still have the greatest confidence and enthusiasm for The Independents.

Stop, Matt. I’m afraid.

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

What else? Ah, “A.I.: Artificial Intelligence” sucked as a movie, but was intriguing in that, according to director Spielberg, the arguably Spielbergian moments of whimsy were actually Kubrick’s idea while he directed and added the much darker moments.

[Bo Cara Esq.]

I actually think that movie is underrated.

[Derpetologist]

Spielberg was trying to imitate Kubrick’s style and it just didn’t work.

[Derpetologist]

Spielberg was trying to imitate Kubrick’s style and it just didn’t work.

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

Too much wasted potential and a horrible ending.

[SIV]

I danced with Ashley Scott at a friend’s wedding. She played the female sexbot who said one line. Unfortunately dancing was as far as I got.

[widget]

…robots?smart machines that will (depending on who you talk to) liberate us from work, diagnose our strokes, drive our cars, modernize our economies, blow up our enemies, end humanity as we know it, or merely vacuum our houses while consoling us about the dwindling human race.

There aren’t enough mechanical engineers to make this happen any time soon. The software and commutations are ready, and have been for some time. It is the devil-in-the-details materials science that leaves the goal posts at a distance.

When you push the heat button of your microwave oven or start your car’s engine you are standing on the shoulders of a few giants and millions of midgets.

[Jensen]

New Vegas has completely killed my desire for sexbots.

[Agammamon]

You need to get with Fister Roboto – He’s *learning*!

[SweatingGin]

Can’t believe we forgot Chokebot so far in the list of best robots.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

INDEPENDENTS ASSEMBLE!

[Rufus J. Firefly]

But it’s raining outside.

[RannedPall]

The Amazing Spider-Man 2 looks interesting

[SweatingGin]

INDEPENDENTS UNZIP!

… the cover on your fiber optic brain jack.

[jesse.in.mb]

Damn SG, now I’m just standing here with my dick in my hand.

[SweatingGin]

Where you keep your fiber optic brain link is up to you.

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

http://youtu.be/VxLacN2Dp6A

[Byte Me]

I hope Kennedy is wearing an R2D2 themed dress or something.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Jawa doesn’t work for you?

[Byte Me]

Nah, but the tranquil blue with giant hoops is ok, I guess.

[kibby]

Well she made a reference to him, at least.

[Soros' Wank-noose]

Well…..some R2 blue.

That work?

[Soros' Wank-noose]

Alright, then!

[Episiarch]

Jesus, why does Cavuto have to be on before the show? He drones and drones…

[Fist of Etiquette]

Prediction: Hoop like hoops.

[Episiarch]

Oh look…hoops.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Again with the light lipstick.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Is that polyester?

[SweatingGin]

Kennedy only owns one pair of hoop earrings. They’re so futuristic, they adjust size and sparkling at her mere thought.

They also serve as weapons.

[jesse.in.mb]

Ooh, like Xena: Warrior Princess?

[Soros' Wank-noose]

Too bad Dell Griffith is still with us. She could have bought some of those Dianne Sawyer-autographed hoops.

[kibby]

Oh, Matt. That tie is flashing on the stream & hurts my eyes something awful.

[SweatingGin]

Well, now I want to watch terminator again.

[Episiarch]

Wow, Matt somehow managed to wear a robotic-looking jacket, shirt, and tie. Kmele looks like he’s going to teach a poetry class and hit on the female students.

[SweatingGin]

“I just wanted to offer you a personal invitation to poetry slam down at the coffee shop on Tuesday evening”

[SweatingGin]

“I just wanted to offer you a personal invitation to poetry slam down at the coffee shop on Tuesday evening”

[Episiarch]

“Hey baby, want to help me straighten out my Longfellow?”

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Kmele is no longer sick.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Tonight’s show is going to be nothing but clips?

[Francisco d'Anconia]

I, for one, welcome our new robot overlords.

[Fist of Etiquette]

WHAT THE FUCK?

[Rufus J. Firefly]

As long as robots kill all the clowns.

[Episiarch]

James Barat fears robots because he seems to be one of the models with rubber skin. We spotted them easy.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Does manual labor include sex?

[Bobarian]

Not if you do it right.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Oh, here we go.

But what about the buggy makers Mr Ford.

[Byte Me]

This is exactly what I thought of.

[kibby]

Given the fact that the only jobs I can find right now are as a bank teller, I’m pretty sure they’re not going anywhere any time soon.

[Episiarch]

You could always become a police officer.

[kibby]

Something tells me I would score too high on an IQ test for that.

[Episiarch]

You shouldn’t sell yourself short.

[kibby]

Why are you so mean?

[Episiarch]

“Because I can be.”

[jesse.in.mb]

It’s the only way he can get off.

Well that and padded tweezers.

[jesse.in.mb]

Worst case scenario is we’re forced to watch Cleopatra 2525 forever while robots on the surface heal the environmental damage we’ve caused.

Best case: they wipe us all out before it comes to that.

[JeremyR]

I watched that show because of Victoria Pratt

[Fist of Etiquette]

Cyborgs! Welch knows who our real enemy will be.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

I don’t get it. If we program robots how than they turn on us?

[SweatingGin]

They could make more robots that can turn on us.

[Agammamon]

Unintended consequences? We can’t even make laws without those, imagine what’ll be lurking in the programming of a new type of mind.

[SweatingGin]

For me, the fun is when you give autonomous programs/robots/cars/drones their own bitcoin wallets. Then they can pay for hosting, power, storage, etc. And get paid to do “tasks”

[Derpetologist]

I heard about one of the first robots. Whenever it hit an obstacle, which was often, it would plead “Help, Help, Help, there is something in my way!”

Over and over and over.

[SweatingGin]

They built an automated progressive?!?

[Fist of Etiquette]

Okay, I can’t get past this guy’s, um, jacket I guess we’ll call it.

[Soros' Wank-noose]

How’d you handle the brow ridge?

[Fist of Etiquette]

Edit!

[Episiarch]

NO NO NOT BICENTENNIAL MAN YOU MONSTERS

[Derpetologist]

Ok, Kennedy, we see what you did there. There is no doubt she reads the comments.

Full robot indeed…

[Episiarch]

Hansen completely missed the opportunity to say “because these aren’t the droids they’re looking for”.

[Bobarian]

You have to wear a bathrobe to pull that off

[Fist of Etiquette]

And get a call from Lucas’ attorneys.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Can’t all of this be avoided by putting an ON/OFF switch on Skynet.

[SweatingGin]

Not if it’s built right.

[Derpetologist]

Skynet essentially committed suicide when it launched the missiles.

I like to think it went “oh crap…” right after the launch.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Three laws! That’s all we need.

[Episiarch]

Uh, if you’d read all the books, you’d know there is a fourth one.

[SweatingGin]

“any attempt to arrest a senior OCP employee results in shutdown”

[Bobarian]

Kmele is a Machole.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Robotic body parts.

I have a feeling robo-cocks will be in high demand and low supply.

[Byte Me]

I want an robot lawn mower, and I want it to be high compression and turbo-charged, none of that gay battery crap.

[Episiarch]

Look, Kennedy, I already have titanium bones in one leg. I’M ALREADY THERE.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

I have screws in my knees and shoulder.

Does that count?

[Episiarch]

No, you’re barely metal. Heavy metal, that is!

[Bobarian]

I like this guy’s plan for Social Security.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

When we get robot cars, I’m buying a bar.

[SweatingGin]

“Robot car, take me home. And I’d like a martini for the ride, please” is really my life’s greatest dream.

[Bobarian]

But what about robot bars?

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Sex with Robots.

Now that’s porn.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Between MTV and TI what was Kennedy up to?

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Building a droid.

[SweatingGin]

Nekkid on the cover of a book.

[Marshall Gill]

Which book? Link? You mention naked female flesh and don’t include a pictures? W T F ?!

[Notorious G.K.C.]

The singularity is the moment we don’t know what will happen next.

So, now?

[Episiarch]

The Singularity will be when Kennedy gets hyper enough to power Skynet once and for all.

[Byte Me]

I though “singularities” were the black hole that destroyed Vulcan.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

I can be better than I was…better, stronger, faster…

*cue the cool music*

[Bobarian]

Deathlock is being introduced on Agents of Shield, but Steve Austin was the shit.

[Bobarian]

And he was a real bargain, too!

[Rufus J. Firefly]

I soooo want a hover craft.

[kibby]

Far longer than a hundred years. Hephaistos built himself some pretty sweet golden robot women to help out around his workshop.

[Episiarch]

Well, he needed them since his mother/father threw him out of Olympus and fucked up his leg.

[kibby]

I don’t recall arguing against their existence at any point in my sentence above.

[Episiarch]

Jetpacks are fucking retarded, Matt. Jetcycles are the way to go.

[BiMonSciFiCon]

Hover bikes.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Wtf Michigan?

[SIV]

What about self-driving vacuum cleaners and window washers?

[Fist of Etiquette]

What if I develop mutant abilities and I’m the only one capable of ending our robot overlords? Will you people compensate me adequately?

[SweatingGin]

I’ll sell you out to the robots.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Robot money is silicon-backed. It will be worthless to meatbags.

[Episiarch]

No, you’ll be shunned and have to go to a mansion with the other mutants and be used as a heavy-handed allegory for gay equality.

[Fist of Etiquette]

What if my mutant ability is to turn all the robots gay so they die out after a generation?

[Episiarch]

YOU’RE MISSING THE POINT.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Am I, Episiarch? Am I?

[SweatingGin]

Mmmm… Singularity Whiskey…

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Bender better be on that list.

[Derpetologist]

Screw your list! I’ll make a better list…with blackjack! And hookers!

In fact… forget the list!

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Delta, I’ll up my game, so up yours.

[Byte Me]

OMG, I forgot about JOHNNY 5! I used to love Short Circuit when I was a kid.

[Bobarian]

Worst. Robot. Ever.

[JeremyR]

That was Vincent from The Black Hole.

[Byte Me]

Worst. Robot. Ever.

Don’t “other” Johnny 5, man. Give him a “trigger warning” first. (after all, he does have a functioning laser weapon)

[Episiarch]

Fisher Steven’s Indian guy was…uh…classic.

[Soros' Wank-noose]

Thank you!!

[Soros' Wank-noose]

*NOT Fisher Stevens

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Robot was the best robot.

[SweatingGin]

Crow, and whatever the gumball machine was.

[Bobarian]

Tom Servo

[SweatingGin]

Right! need the brain augmentation to find that quicker.

[JeremyR]

Tom Servo

And as an aside, they are going to be back on TV April 1st on National Geographic, making fun of animal shows.

[SweatingGin]

Awesome, thanks.

[SIV]

Do androids count as robots?

What about Nomad and VGER? Robots or no?

[Episiarch]

Man, that ground drone is creepy looking. It looks like a skinned and prepped rabbit.

[Bobarian]

skinned and prepped rabbit are delicious.

[Episiarch]

Yeah, but they don’t move around like they’re still alive, unless I’m doing a puppet show with them.

[SweatingGin]

That four-legged robot is awesome because it is obviously a two-stroke motor, belching blue smoke and sounding like a chainsaw.

Pretty sure the next version will have a dog’s brain in it.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

And it walks like a wild boar.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

8000?

Serious question, how many does Russia or China have – if any?

[kibby]

My vote is for Aya, though she had some actual organic basis so maybe she doesn’t count. I’m also probably the only person that watched that show.

[Fist of Etiquette]

I want my robots to be humanoid. Bipedal at the very least.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Holy exasperated sigh, Batman!

[Notorious G.K.C.]

He’s sure refuting the advocates of casualty-free, perfect wars!

[SIV]

“Report to the disintegration chamber”

[Bobarian]

We are soylent green, at the end of the day.

[Fist of Etiquette]

I predict we’ll have to go back in time to stop Newt Gingrich from saving our electronics from an EMP which would have destroyed all the developing robots.

[GILMORE]

The Independents Attire Review, 28 March 2014

I AM CLEARLY CONSERVATIVE-Edition

– Kennedy: Is it Ultraviolet? or is that just what the dress *wants you to think*? Kennedy tonight tests a variety of emotion-sensitive fabric nano-technologies, none of which add to the Sexy-Quotient more than the plunging virtual-neckline. We reiterate our positive view on color-extremes in Kennedy’s wardrobe; she may soon provide an ideal testbed for emerging Lazer-Earring technologies.

– Matt: Agent Smith approves of the dynamic use of stripes in the standard monochrome uniform; we find the suprising use of a blue-shirt/blue-tie combo to be almost distubing in its appeal to ‘Conservative Normality’. Something in the Matrix is wrong here. We strongly suspect the real Matt has been cloned and replaced with a Fox News-programmed MattBot. Unsurprisingly, the robot dresses better.

– Kmele: We always have nice things to say about Kmele’s sportcoat-library; however, nits must be picked, and we note both a distinct gap at the rear neck revealing a poor shoulder-cut, and lapels at least an inch too wide for a skinny-tie. What’s the Deal, Kmele? One of the liabilities of an endless supply of sport-coats must be the inevitable poor-fit. We never believed this day would come, but here it is = Matt takes the win.

“Klaatu barada nikto”

Thank You

[kibby]

I hope someone somewhere is collecting these to publish.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

He’s famous now. Welch just tweeted it, and Kmele responded. I thought he was above that. (Kmele, not Welch.)

[kibby]

Kmele loves us!

[Episiarch]

I already drink, sleep, and drive, Kennedy. It’s pretty much all I do.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

ANAN: You realise what you have done?
KIRK: Yes, I do. I’ve given you back the horrors of war.

[Episiarch]

“We can admit that we’re killers, but we’re not going to kill today. That’s all it takes.”

[Fist of Etiquette]

“An entrance, captain … but no exit. They go in, but they do not come out.”

[Bobarian]

Black Flag Roach Motel.

Roaches check in, but they don’t check out.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

These guys sent a driver-less car to China.

https://www.youtube.com/user/TheVisLabChannel

[Fist of Etiquette]

This commercial is for beer robots?

[Fist of Etiquette]

They’ll probably make Olde Fortran.

[Bobarian]

Fuck driverless cars. Driving is still one of my greater pleasures.

Drinking is another, though, so… hmm.

[kibby]

But driving would be so much more fun without a whole bunch of idiots texting on their phones slamming on their brakes every fifteen seconds.

[Bobarian]

Absolutely true, but next they’ll want robots to do my drinking, and so, again fuck driverless cars.

[SweatingGin]

Kennedy got me at “make your car a den of irresponsibility”

[Fist of Etiquette]

Driving Miss Daisy Chain

[Episiarch]

I have a self-driving car already. Her name is Christine. She hasn’t killed me…yet.

“Whoa, whoa. You better watch what you say about my car. She’s real sensitive.”

[kibby]

& the stream is dead. For me, at any rate.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Oh, thank God, I thought I had journeyed into madness and had stopped processing my sensory input.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

It returned!

[Fist of Etiquette]

IT HAS BEGUN.

[kibby]

It happened really quickly, because the stream is back.

[Fist of Etiquette]

IT HAS PAUSED FOR NOW.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

I imagine once everybody has one of these, we could double or triple the speed limits.

[Episiarch]

But then how are they going to collect all those ticket fees?!?

[Francisco d'Anconia]

I’m sure they’ll find a way.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Skynet started as the designated driver, you know.

[GILMORE]

GILMORE fashion note#:

– shave?

if you’re gonna beard, beard. if not, shave motherfucker. Because that shit is 2 days old, and clearly you’re trying to cultivate the Don Johnson and all you’re getting is ‘lazy’.

[Episiarch]

FUCK YOU GILMORE

Perma-stubble is a way of life.

[Bobarian]

A way of life for people who can’t grow real beards.

[kibby]

Exactly. My ex did this & thought he was so hot…it was just gross.

[Episiarch]

Or for people who look good.

[kibby]

At least for those who think they do.

[GILMORE]

I have mixed views on the issue.

With a suit, I’m ANTI.

As a daily “Do”? I’m down.

[kibby]

You’re wrong.

[GILMORE]

On which?

I say this as a beard-wearer.

Scruff as a daily thing is something I think is a person’s own business (and/or woman’s business, natch). with a suit, you should at least look like you’re sort of *trying* to look good as opposed to just wearing nice clothes. It sends a “I don’t care” message.

[Episiarch]

I agree, not for a suit. It just looks wrong. Luckily, I haven’t had to wear a suit in a long, long time.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Ditto that my friend.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Damn, looks like the internet just jammed my link. May not see the second leg of the show.

Tabernak.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Maybe not.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Damn. A shot at road workers from out of nowhere.

[Byte Me]

What about the robot/human/clone things from the recent Battlestar Galactica reboot? (dibs on the blonde antagonist)

[kibby]

If you don’t know they’re called Cylons & who Six is, I don’t want to be your friend.

[Byte Me]

Of course I know those things. Perhaps my attempt at cheeky-ness failed.

I have actually started watching Caprica (after having watched Battlestar), though I haven’t watched it in a couple weeks.

[kibby]

Cheekiness doesn’t translate over the internet, unfortunately.

Caprica drags for the first half, but if you stick with it the second will reward you. Until there’s no resolved ending because they cancelled it.

[Byte Me]

Until there’s no resolved ending because they cancelled it.

DON’T RUIN IT FOR ME!

…But yea, the first few episodes are kinda slow, like it is interesting, but not something I’ll binge watch. I’ll probably get back into it soon.

[Episiarch]

What exactly is BP trying to sell me? Their tarnished brand?

[Derpetologist]

BP spills coffee- still a classic:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2AAa0gd7ClM

[Fist of Etiquette]

The iDoctor moved off his mark.

[Episiarch]

His staging is terrible. You’d think he’d never done theater.

[Fist of Etiquette]

This isn’t a robot, it’s an avatar.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

I think I prefer the days when a good bleeding was considered advanced medicine.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Strokes scare me the most. And we have that in my family.

[GILMORE]

I am still so far short one “Mr Roboto” reference.

come on people. I loved that song when I was…uh. 8? I think.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

The downfall of STYX.

[GILMORE]

you say that like its a bad thing.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

The Grand Illusion was the best album ever made.

[GILMORE]

(EXPLOSIVE VOMIT OF SURPRISE)!

Groohulabb, bwhat!?

I will go listen to that just to see how much you’re kidding. Did it feature ‘come sail away’ at least?

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Yes. Styx was like a real band before they converted to pop with Paradise Theater (which still wasn’t horrible). I refuse to acknowledge the existence of that robot album.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

WOW!

[SweatingGin]

down boy

[Episiarch]

I documented the rise of the machines too. By watching Terminator 3.

[SweatingGin]

They never made a terminator 3. Or any others. Just 1 and 2. That’s all.

[Fist of Etiquette]

I’ll be back… in Terminator Salvation.

[Episiarch]

Come on, didn’t you find the McG-directed one compelling? Like a car crash is compelling?

[SweatingGin]

fingers in ears

LALALALALA

[GILMORE]

hm. big girl. John is happy.

[Fist of Etiquette]

You can attend my Institute of Robot Repair.

[Bobarian]

The iDoc involves getting attention from a specialist from across the country. You can’t get attention from most of them when they’re in the room with you. Fail.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

New camera angles. Freakin me out.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Obviously we’ll build starships and gallop around the cosmos.

[Bobarian]

Obviously we’ll build starships sexbots and virtual reality and gallop around the cosmos die in our iRecliners.

FTFY

[Bobarian]

Did she just bust on journalists?

[Episiarch]

“Did you notice what went wrong in that scene? Ordinarily, Billy would work hard to make money from his paper route. Then he’d use the money to buy dinner for Mavis, thus earning the slim chance to perform the reproductive act. But in a world where teens can date robots, why should he bother? Why should anyone bother? Let’s take a look at Billy’s planet a year later. Where are all the football stars? And where are the biochemists? They’re trapped! Trapped in a soft, vice-like grip of robot lips. All civilization was just an effort to impress the opposite sex… and sometimes the same sex.”

[MJGreen]

DON’T

DATE

ROBOTS

[sloopyinca]

I’m all for AI. Philly should retire his number.

[SweatingGin]

Futurama really has the best robots. Of course Bender, but who can forget HedonismBot? Or Clamps. Greeting Card Revolutionary.

HedonismBot might be my favorite.

Let us cavort like the Greeks of old!

[Episiarch]

“In your face, Gandhi!”

[Derpetologist]

What is Marvin the paranoid android, chopped liver?

[paranoid android]

Figures. Brain the size of a planet, don’t even warrant a mention in top robot lists.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Writing Unit 12 was my favorite.

[Episiarch]

Not Humorbot 5.0?

“Anecdote accepted. Snappy comeback not found.”

Seriously, though, Calculon is the greatest.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

NEW YORK TO BUSINESSES: I got tax breaks and stuff in my van, come and see!

[Derpetologist]

Derp. The final frontier. These are the tales of a Derpetologist. His continuing mission: to explore strange, new fools. To seek out new morons and new half-wit imbeciles. To boldly sigh where no one has sighed before…

? ? ?

At a past job, I needed to get the operators to fill out a new form. Nothing fancy, just 2 or 3 more words per hour than what they were already writing. I made a little announcement that would be displayed on the info monitors. The first part was a simple message explaining the purpose and that they should fill them out. The second part was a little joke to lighten the mood. It was a picture of the duct tape or WD-40 troubleshooting flow chart. I sent it to the plant manager for feedback (this was the same one I unsuccessfully tried to explain dew points to). He replied that my message made me sound like a dictator and he didn’t like my joke. He then said that I should remember that you can catch more flies with honey than gall.

Gee, thanks Dad for that pearl of wisdom.

By the way, this guy taped up dozens of notices in underlined, red, large font & ALL CAPS.

[GILMORE]

Testing the formula =

Will Kmele get his 60 seconds of lucid commentary at the end of the show?

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Don’t your legs make you run faster?

[Rufus J. Firefly]

It’s a tale of two threads tonight.

[Byte Me]

It’s too bad there are not any robots in Firefly. Perhaps sci-fi with a libertarian edge could be next Friday’s show?

[Bobarian]

The Independents is already Sci-Fi.

[Episiarch]

I’d be way more scared of Kennedy hassling me on the street than a robot.

Jesus, a Blackhawks fan wearing a Mets hat. It’s like a perfect storm of retardation.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

I was thinking the exact same thing.

[GILMORE]

Same thought

[Fist of Etiquette]

I would replace everything with robotics except my dick. Obviously.

[Bobarian]

The robotics would obviously reject your dick in horror, once they saw what you did with it.

[SweatingGin]

No doomcock for you?

[Fist of Etiquette]

“That’s all he was in the end, a dick.”

[Fist of Etiquette]

Favorite robot was the Robot from Lost in Space. I don’t know why.

[widget]

As I noted above, that was the robot with no name.

Which reminds of this:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RodVcJtShdk

[Francisco d'Anconia]

And then he blows them up.

[GILMORE]

I would have answered “To Kill People Who Try and Interrupt Me”

[sloopyinca]

Better Capital One ad:
Samuel L Jackson: Credit, motherfucker, do you have it?,

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Michael Jackson?

Kmele, you just lost a shitload of cool points.

[Fist of Etiquette]

AH! Lou DobBot!

[Soros' Wank-noose]

Isn’t it Lou DAHbbs?

[Episiarch]

Vicki from Small Wonder is clearly the best robot of all time.

[Bobarian]

If you’re a pedophile

[kibby]

IIRC, she won the Robot Rumble panel at Comic Con a hundred years ago. I have no idea how that happened, given how many other fantastic robots were her challengers.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jerry_Supiran

Holy crap.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

She’s a nurse in the Pacific Northwest. Are you trying to tap that ass?

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Withdrawn. The years have not been kind.

[widget]

The robot from “Lost in Space” did not have a name.

From Wikipedia:

The Robot is a Class M-3 Model B9, General Utility Non-Theorizing Environmental Control Robot, which had no given name.

I throw that in there for no reason whatsoever.

[SweatingGin]

Not even a quick clip of Chokebot

[GILMORE]

oh…..

……

…. dobbs

(sigh)

[sloopyinca]

Don’t none of you faggots like sports? The fucking sweet 16 games are on and you’re playing political grabass.

Jesus, no wonder there are no libertarian…people.

[SweatingGin]

Good sport starts Monday.

Just haven’t been back to hockey this season.

[Sevo]

…”The fucking sweet 16 games”…

Can only take marketing swill in smaller doses:
MARCH MAAAADNESSS!
SWEET SIXTEEN (how cute)
THE DANCE!
FINAL FOUR!
Too much; I’m not even angry. These are kids playing hoops.

[Fist of Etiquette]

I has the Pens game in PiP, if that makes you feel any better.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Don’t follow baseball.

[Sevo]

“Don’t follow baseball.”

Don’t blame you. Where you are, they’d have a good season if summer happened on a Saturday.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

We actually have a a minor league team here, the Great Falls Voyagers.

We’ve been to a few games.

[Sevo]

Sounds fun.
One of the things I miss from the midwest, along with thunderstorms and half-mile dirt tracks.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Yeah, I have attention problems too. Or, I just don’t care.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Alright. That’s enough. Will you guys let me go watch the UK/Louisville game?

[SweatingGin]

Brace for normals.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Gilmore is destined for Great Things.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Sorry, GILMORE.

[kibby]

If Matt doesn’t feel compelled to capitalize it, you probably don’t need to either.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

I’M MY OWN MAN

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

P.S. How did your mom make it into Kmele’s twitter feed?

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Seriously:

Take heart @kmele, unlike Kibby’s mom, I like you despite disagreeing with everything you say.

Kmele ?@kmele Mar 13
@RC135_AMS exactly like my mother-in-law

[kibby]

I saw it when he retweeted it & was too ashamed to do anything about it. I heart you, Kmele! My Mom is an idiot sometimes.

[GILMORE]

I am honestly surprised they even read this stuff. Who knew?

[Notorious G.K.C.]

“LOS ANGELES (CNS) ? A poster created by U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement, warning Southlanders that marriage fraud is a federal crime, will go on display Monday at a downtown Los Angeles bus stop….

“The poster includes two photos: one showing the inside of a church decorated for a wedding, and the second showing the inside of a jail, along with the words: “If you walk down this aisle for the wrong reasons ? you could end up walking down this aisle.”…

“”Marriage fraud is not a story line for a Hollywood romantic comedy,” said Claude Arnold, special agent in charge for ICE Homeland Security Investigations Los Angeles.”

http://kfwbam.com/2014/03/28/m…..s-angeles/

[paranoid android]

Kevin Carson at the Center for a Stateless Society thinks Reason‘s Ron Bailey is a big ol’ statist shill for Monsanto:

In the mainstream libertarian movement, accusations of “statism” typically focus on a fairly predictable set of targets. Anyone who complains of racism, sexism or other social justice issues, the economic exploitation of workers or degradation of the environment is reflexively accused of statism on the assumption that exploitation, injustice and pollution could only be problems for people who hate freedom.

This is perhaps nowhere as true as with factory farming and genetically modified crops. For example, Ron Bailey at Reason regularly defends these things against organic farming and sustainable agriculture advocates, and other supposedly “statist” enemies on the Left.

He then goes on to say that claims about the safety of GMO foods are industry propaganda because there’s this one study that says that there’s formaldehyde in the corn, apparently.

[Sevo]

So is the Center for a Stateless Society proposing the state enact laws opposing foods people want to eat?

[Sevo]

Oh, and:
…”sustainable agriculture advocates”…
Kevin Carson is a bullshit artist; that phrase is totally meaningless, unless he’s referring to modern mechanized farming.

[Derpetologist]

I heard that they tried many complex algorithms for the Rooba. They ended up just programming to turn right whenever it hit a corner.

I suspect this process will have to be repeated several thousand times before robots come even close to doing things like understanding spoken language.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

That is consistent with my understanding of the Roomba that I threw off of my third floor balcony.

[Sevo]

Derpetologist|3.28.14 @ 10:14PM|#
“I heard that they tried many complex algorithms for the Rooba. They ended up just programming to turn right whenever it hit a corner.”

If this is Roomba, nope. I don’t know what the algorithm is, but it it not ‘always right turn’.
The tracks on a carpet are obviously not random, but they’re complex enough to fool those who might not know that.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Get a Dyson like an adult!

[Sevo]

When I can turn a Dyson on, walk away, and find the room vac’d when I come back a half-hour later, I’ll do so.
BTW, those things are wonderful for cleaning under beds, sofas, etc. And chasing cats out of those locations.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Cats are part of the problem.

I can’t explain the shark costume.

[Sevo]

Hell, I defy anyone to explain *anything* in that vid!

[Notorious G.K.C.]

These television personalities and their guests certainly made some interesting points. Smack Daddy Bebop would like it.

didipasstheturingtest.com

[Derpetologist]

Let us take a moment to remember history’s greatest robot: JFK

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K7y2xPucnAo

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Piers Morgan ends his last show with an attack on the National Rifle Association and a call for gun control.

http://www.mediaite.com/tv/pie…..-farewell/

[Sevo]

And the NRA laughs!

[Derpetologist]

Anyone who thinks the police or the military are all highly-trained in firearms should do some more research.

[Sevo]

I don’t think any amount of research would fix Morgan’s stupid; it seems genetic.

[lap83]

Liberals are allergic to research. Gun control is proof positive.

[Bobarian]

You think he did any research?

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Adios…

…bitch!

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

I hereby invite him to re-enact the revolutionary war with me.

[lap83]

“Have your guns spayed and neutered”

[Archduke von Pantsfan]

Did anyone remind Jeremy Clarkson today?
He was ranting about an article in the Daily Fail earlier.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

What happened, the west coast fall into the ocean?

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

?Que?

[Archduke von Pantsfan]

HI, Everybody!

[Francisco d'Anconia]

“Everybody” is kinda thin tonight.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

That’s because it’s Friday

You’re welcome.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Wasn’t it last Friday we had over 1000 comments?

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

I think the squirrels still had control then. We have been hitting around 700 on weeknights this week. Say something controversial, and see what happens.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Something controversial.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

D-

[Neoliberal Kochtopus]

as a reminder, the record is 2,123, set here:

http://reason.com/blog/2007/12…..ia#comment

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Damn.

Way before my time.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Yeah. You were probably doing something productive back then.

[Sevo]

Neoliberal Kochtopus|3.28.14 @ 11:48PM|#
“as a reminder, the record is 2,123, set here:”

I would have thought one of the White Indian threads might have beat that, but maybe the deleted posts didn’t count.

[l0b0t]

I waded through, perhaps, half of that thread. Damn, I really miss J sub D.

[Sevo]

“Everybody” is kinda thin tonight.
Sevo ain’t

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Hi, Dr. Nick!

[Derpetologist]

Tales from the Derp

Today, I had to schedule a meeting. I don’t why the person who told me to do it could not do it himself. I suspect it because he does not know how and is embarrassed to ask. We have a common calendar on the network, so it’s easy to pick a slot that works for everyone. The tricky part is getting a room. The rooms are booked by the secretaries. There is one room that has a nice table, but I can’t use it unless there are managers in the meeting. What a pity- that room is almost always empty.

The secretary was nice and found a slot for me. Yay. The only question left is why I had to spend 4 years in college to do this.

[Neoliberal Kochtopus]

oh hell I got you beat there: I went to four years of college and three years of law school just to schedule meetings.

[Sevo]

“The secretary was nice and found a slot for me. Yay. The only question left is why I had to spend 4 years in college to do this.”

So you could identify and convince the person who had the power to deliver the goods you needed to do so.
Hell, I can see that from here!

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

So, what did I miss? I demand a detailed recount of the show.

[Sevo]

Didn’t watch the show, since it’s a TV talk show.
But if you go ‘way up-thread, to like the start, there’s a ‘discussion’ of AI that probably should have gotten on the show.

[Archduke von Pantsfan]

Is Virginia going to hold off MSU?

[Archduke von Pantsfan]

Everybody have fun tonight,
Everybody wang chung tonight
.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

EARTHQUAKE!!!!!

[Archduke von Pantsfan]

The West Coast

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

That’s less than 5 miles from me. Quick but strong jolt.

[Archduke von Pantsfan]

apparently there were 2 in a row

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

I came home 40 minutes ago and my sisters said they felt a little one earlier that I didn’t notice while driving.

That’s the strongest I’ve felt in a long time.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

There was a little foreshock earlier.

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

EARTHQUAKE!

[Archduke von Pantsfan]

5.4!!

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

My chandelier is on a 12 foot chain, and it’s still swinging.

[Sevo]

Damn Jack Daniels; didn’t feel it in SF.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Ha. I’ve had a few beers, and didn’t feel the acceleration, but there are certain noises in my house that only happen during earthquakes. I get the creaks in the studs and joists, the popping sound in the drywall, and the wine glasses hanging in the bar start to collide.

[Sevo]

Prolly if it was really evident here, the dog would have been scurrying around.
We’re on bedrock in SF, so it takes a bit to give us a shake. The ’89 quake didn’t even shake a glass from an open shelf.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

So you are in the hills? There is a lot of fill in the marina area. In one of my geo classes at Berkeley, we walked the Hayward and SA faults, and there was a lot of potential for destruction.

The bedrock is incredibly deep here, miles at some points. It dampens to some degree, but is subject to liquefaction. I’m on beach sand, so my slab is double thick.

[Archduke von Pantsfan]

Three in a row

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

Okay, you’re not America’s Hat. Now turn off the earthquake machine.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Dibs on Otisville.

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

Fine, I’ll shack up with Ms Teschmacher.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

My comment up-thread was kinda prophetic?

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Jesus?

[Francisco d'Anconia]

He’s my son.

[Archduke von Pantsfan]

Whatever happened to

the Breakfast Club?

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Molly Ringwald looks like she slimmed down again. She was looking pretty hideous when she did that cameo in Not Another Teen Movie.

[Warrren]

I heard Rosie O’Donnell was starting a new calisthenics regimen with this hot new trainer out in L.A. tonight. You guys hear anything about that?

[Archduke von Pantsfan]

hi-yo!

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

That’s just the jug wine talking. I think she’s hot.

[Warrren]

I don’t think I’m the drunk one, here.

[Archduke von Pantsfan]

dude, what?

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

And that’s how we get more comments.

[Archduke von Pantsfan]

Who is Magic Johnson?

Alex: oh no

[Archduke von Pantsfan]

Indian political parties with strange names

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

And another one.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

My house has a damper. I’m not getting the rolls.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

I’m going to unlock the gun safe just in case.

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

Chandelier, wine bar, do you live in a goaddamn chateau!?

[Archduke von Pantsfan]

he’s a libertarian. how else should he live?

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

It isn’t exclusively for wine. It has all kinds of booze.

How am I supposed to see what I’m eating without a chandelier? I lowered the ceiling from 30′ to 18′, but the canned lights in the ceiling still don’t do shit from that height.

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

How am I supposed to see what I’m eating without a chandelier?

Uh, you have your child servants stand at attention holding lamps lit with whale oil.

Duh.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

There are no green tax credits in that.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

BTW, I went LED 2 months ago, and my electric bill is down 70%.

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

My mom works for Edison so we get a discount on the electric bill.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

How much of a discount? Your answer will determine how much I hate you.

For the record, my January electric bill was over $400.

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

25%. And she earns every bit of it.

[Sevo]

“BTW, I went LED 2 months ago, and my electric bill is down 70%.”

Yeah, and you look great with that sort of green cast…

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

I get the dimmable warm colored ones for the can lights in the ceiling. Same look as the the incandescent ones. I made the mistake of getting 2 of the blue ones, and my bathroom looked like a gas station.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

I went LED 2 months ago

We looked at doing that the other day. Turns out to be quite the investment. We’d need like 20 dimmable bulbs and maybe 30 regular…

Thats a lot of bourbon.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

‘

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

My Home Depot trip was around $450. It has almost payed for itself in less that 3 months. I look back over my Quicken info, and I realize that I’m a fucking idiot for not doing it sooner. It would have saved me more that $1200 last year.

Yeah, I drank a lot when I had to change all of those bulbs. I did abstain when I had to climb the 22 footer. It wobbles when I’m the top.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

We have one of those bulb changers on the big telescoping handle.

Has an interchangeable window squeegee head.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

I have one too. 50% success rate, even after I spit on the suction cup, so I got tired of cleaning up broken glass.

That won’t matter if you go LED. They last 20 years.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Yeah, the first time I used mine it unscrewed the globe with the bulb.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Oh, silly me! You meant that the light bulbs would cost you bourbon.

They will get you more bourbon in the future.

[Episiarch]

That was just Louisville fans shitting their pants. Kentucky and UConn winning today; I know someone who is very happy about that.

[kibby]

Are all of you guys going to die?

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

You might wake up tomorrow and find that Tucson is a beach city.

[kibby]

SCORE. We’ve already got the sand, just needed the water.

[Archduke von Pantsfan]

so there are downsides to living in tucson?

[kibby]

Outside of its zero culture, you mean?

[Archduke von Pantsfan]

uh, yeah.
aside from that.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Do you like nice weather? Do you like palm trees?

[Agammamon]

Tucson has great weather – I grew up there.

[Archduke von Pantsfan]

St. Petersburg From Above

you’re welcome.

[Archduke von Pantsfan]

On March 29, some people will be sitting in the dark to express their “vote” for action on global climate change. Instead, you can join CEI and the thousands of people around the world who will be celebrating Human Achievement Hour (HAH). Leave your lights on to express your appreciation for the inventions and innovations that make today the best time to be alive and the recognition that future solutions require individual freedom not government coercion.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Hah! I volunteer for a charity, and I somehow got volun-selected for earth hour tomorrow. I’m going to do everything I can to ruin it for every one of those smug assholes.

[kibby]

You were not volun-selected, you were volun-told. My Latin teacher loved using that one & it’s grown on me.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Yeah, that’s the term. I couldn’t remember for some reason.

[Sevo]

If you post this somewhere tomorrow, I’ll help bumping it until we get close to X-hour.
And if I had something with a huffed Chrysler in it, I’d start is just about THEN!

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

THE Ohio State girl wants to know: What the f*ck happened to dating?

Did the boy you hooked up with two weeks ago just send you a casual, “What’s up” text? Does that mean you’re like, talking now? How long should you wait to text him back? Is it okay to double-text if he doesn’t answer within 10 minutes? Does “Heyy” or “Heyyy” sound better? Is an emoji too much? What about two emojis?

Fucking. Stop.

Unless that “What’s up” text is followed by a sincere, “What are you doing tonight? Let’s grab dinner together” text, he’s absolutely no concern of yours. What’s the point of pining over a douche bag? Gather up your precious self-respect and MOVE. ON. We girls can do so much better, and your 30-year-old self will thank you for it.

When you like a boy and that boy likes you, it shouldn’t be complicated. If (and hopefully when) you find that special person, the relationship should flow naturally. Fuck the mind games, fuck the booty calls, fuck him! (Just not literally.) But hey, if you’re all about the casual sex then I’m not here to stop you ? I’m just telling you to get a clue.

Man, that last paragraph. Can she clutch those pearls any harder?

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Booty calls are part of dating. I married a booty call when we finally figured out that we liked each other.

[mr simple]

, the relationship should flow naturally.

Says the single person. Relationships are work, especially long term. Anyone who says otherwise is talking mysticism and doesn’t understand people.

[T?tmacher]

Sounds like you’re stuck in a shitty relationship and want to pretend everyone else is too.

[mr simple]

I suppose an idiotcould infer that from what I said, but you’re just a troll who likes to shit all over everything so no one cares what you think. Don’t worry, I’m sure one day you’ll meet that one right person and you’ll live happily ever after.

[Agammamon]

So, got some glow-in-the-dark paint (the poor man’s tritium) the other day. The plan was to paint part of the hammer on the gun with red GITD and the rear and front sight with green.

The idea was to make the sights a little more visible. Its a mouse-gun and they’re not much more than the *suggestion* of a sight in the first place. And to make it more obvious when the hammer is cocked (when its down its hidden inside the slide and, black on black, its not real visible when its ready to fire either.

Spectacularly disappointing.

Not a large enough area on the sights for enough paint to last and the red glows for about 30 seconds. At least the red does make the hammer visible when its cocked now, so not a *complete* waste of 20 bucks.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

WTF are you planning to do at night?!?

[Archduke von Pantsfan]

defend against the King of England, of course.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

You don’t want him pushing you around, do you? DO YOU?!?

[Agammamon]

When else would you mug someone?

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Daylight. They would never expect it.

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

Goddamnit, that’s enough!

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

I farted, Sorry.

[Archduke von Pantsfan]

I think this is Act I.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Where is La Palma in re La Habra?

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

No more than 3 or 4 miles. Like I said, it was a pretty good jolt.

[Archduke von Pantsfan]

The last 2 show as in Brea

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

That’s slightly further to the northeast, but still within 10 miles.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Same fault. The AS’s will continue towards Diamond Bar.

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

That’s 3-4 miles southwest from La Habra.

[Agammamon]

Looks like this might be the day CA drops off into the ocean.

While I’ll miss you guys, beachfront property yo! Trade-offs are something libertarians understand and you can’t make a beachfront villa in Yuma omelet without breaking some CA resident eggs.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Creative destruction, as I see it.

[Archduke von Pantsfan]

just imagine.
if LA fell away, our movies could be made in Des Moines.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Dude, that’s not the way it works. The Sea of Cortez will merge with the Salton Sea. Do you want to swim in the Salton Sea? DO YOU?!?

I have some really creepy pics from the salton sea. It’s like a nuke went off there…

[Snark Plissken]

When I was living in LA I kept wanting to experience an earthquake, but kept missing them. One happened while I was driving my big ole work van, one I slept through…took like three years, finally experienced a 5.5 in Pasadena, or maybe 5.0 can’t remember.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

When? I happen to be an amateur earthquake historian.

[Snark Plissken]

Let me think, I was living in Hollywood, not that far from Pasadena, so 1988/89?

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

The only one that comes to mind is the Whittier quake in late ’87. That one threw me out of bed.

[Snark Plissken]

That was a pretty strong one though, right? Definitely not a 5 or 5.5. I remember there was a fairly big one right before I got there.

[Snark Plissken]

This one was really loud because I was living in a shitty old apartment in Hollywood, the building itself made a lot of noise, like elephants on the roof.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Whittier was a 5.9, revised down from much higher.

[Sevo]

Anybody hurt?

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

No. Well, my panties are in a bunch, but I don’t mind.

[kibby]

Your list of kinks keeps growing.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Allegedly. I will not stand for this libel.

[RannedPall]

I was standing in my kitchen and didn’t feel shit.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Then how do you know where you were standing when it happened?

[RannedPall]

Because I heard the kitchen window rattle loudly, and saw the lights move, but I didn’t really feel anything, it was WEIRD.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

That is consistent with my experience. Heard, but not felt. I was wrestling with the kids, though. If I were loafing on the couch, I imagine I would have felt something.

[Snark Plissken]

Okay, bitches, what did I miss?

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Apparently CA is in the process of falling into the Pacific.

[Snark Plissken]

Don’t cruelly get my hopes up.

[RannedPall]

Endofzeworld

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Are you Jesus?
http://reason.com/blog/2014/03…..nt_4412707

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

FdA, that post was before the “big” earthquake.

I’m going to listen to whatever the fuck you say from now on.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

What stocks should I buy on Monday?

[Francisco d'Anconia]

I better not waste this. I predict I will win the Powerball jackpot tomorrow night.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Keep it vague so you can’t be disproven. I will remain your disciple.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

The baby kicked for the first time tonight too. Was that also your doing?

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Hey, don’t look at me…I’ve never even met your wife.

Oh, you meant the kick. Yeah, that was me.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

And the double rainbow? Also you?

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Yep, all of em for the last 4.5b years.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

You need to milk this for at least a month.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

I’ll reference it when arguing with the anarchists.

[Archduke von Pantsfan]

According to the USGS list, they keep happening.

[RannedPall]

Aftershocks most likely

[Snark Plissken]

Has anyone blamed it on fracking yet?

[RannedPall]

Yeah, the LA City Council already ordered a review on how fracking might’ve caused the last earthquake. Because the science is settled.

[Snark Plissken]

Never let a good tragedy non-incident go to waste.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

I keep farting. I think Jesse put something in the bread.

[Snark Plissken]

Your making light of greenhouse gasses and the impending tragedy of AGW is duly noted.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

I have to work at earth hour tomorrow. I’m just getting warmed up.

[Archduke von Pantsfan]

As global legal action brews against Formula One management over quieter cars introduced this year, Mr Walker said Victoria had to consider hosting an IndyCar race for about $3.5 million against an F1 event for about $50 million.

Mr Walker, the guardian of F1 racing in Melbourne for 19 years, branded the new, duller sound at this month’s opening race “disgraceful” and likely to drive down attendances.

He told the Herald Sun he had written to F1 boss Bernie Ecclestone to say the sound was “not acceptable” and revealed circuit operators around the globe were lining up to sue Mr Ecclestone and FIA, the sport’s governing body.

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

During the quake the Dodgers were playing the Los Angeles Angels of Orange County, Which Contains La Habra and Anaheim.

Vin Scully provides does play by play of the earthquake

[Archduke von Pantsfan]

i’m surprised there’s not a .gif yet

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

The game wasn’t even in the OC. I hope he doesn’t end up like that KTLA news guy.

[Warrren]

Mr Walker, the guardian of F1 racing

I AM THE GUARDIAN. PAY HEED MORTALS, THOU SHALL NOT BRING THAT WEAK-ASS SHIT INTO MY WARDING!

[Warrren]

Hm, not even 600 posts? C’mon people. Lets abort some food trucks to give gays the gay marriage.

[Snark Plissken]

I am currently trying to transfer a 600M PDF to my iPad using Calibre WiFi server but the browser keeps crashing.

Also, I strongly suspect Stormy Dragon to be Tulpa now, or is that jumping too far?

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

A bit iffy. Make your case.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

OK, I read upthread. If you can provide the link to Tulpa saying something similar, I’ll provide a linguistic analysis.

[Warrren]

Just what Tulpa needs, a cunning linguist.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

I was going to subcontract out to Heroic Mullato. What he does on his own time is his business.

[Warrren]

Sure he’s a mulatto but is he truly heroic?

[Snark Plissken]

I tried but my google-fu was weak. I very specifically remember it though. I was posting under the handle PS at the time.

[Snark Plissken]

In the argument about Penrose at the top, SD said the exact same thing the Tulipmaster said a while back in a similar argument about having seen Penrose and he’s pathetic, senile. Could be coincidence, though.

I agree it’s iffy, SD has been around quite a while, and I’m skeptical of broad sweeping sockpuppet conspiracies that Epi is so fond of.

[GILMORE]

I SEE TUPLA PEOPLE

[Warrren]

I really can’t keep up with that stuff. I’m still impressed by the people who call out the new Mary and Merkin alts in just one post.

So is SD the Tulpooper? I can’t tell.

I hope not. The idea of socking just to argue on a message board where you won’t ever “win” an argument and even if you do, you get absolutely nothing and the argument is ultimately inconsequential is so sad and pathetic that I cannot conceive of what it means to be someone who does that.

[Warrren]

Of course I wrote that having totally forgot about Rollo. So he’s so sad already that it can’t get worse if he is SD.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

I vaguely remember SD when he showed up here a while back. I remember thinking to myself how lame the handle was. It’s like he’s never seen a vagina, and never wants to.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Weekend Mary is impossible to miss. Weekday Mary is sneakier.

[Snark Plissken]

Weekend Mary spilled over into Monday Brickbat Mary a few weeks back. Long, bitter diatribes against Epi but pretty quickly modded.

[Warrren]

Okay, there we go. Only 1500 or so more to break the record!

[Francisco d'Anconia]

G-night kids.

CA Reasonoids, make sure you wear your floaties to bed tonight. Hopefully we’ll see you tomorrow.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Don’t you threaten me, Jesus!

[Snark Plissken]

Alas, there can be only one.

[Warrren]

Who?

[Snark Plissken]

You!

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Under 1000.

Not impressed.

The West coast didn’t come through.

Tsk, tsk.

[Agile Cyborg]

If Kennedy wears a strapless I’ll watch this shit.