Nanny State

Digital Drugs: The Gateway to the Gateway


In a story headlined "Teens Turn to Digital Drugs," NBC Connecticut almost lets the truth get in the way of good scare. It starts out strong, warning that "for as little as $1, you can download audio files that promise to deliver the experience of being drunk or of taking marijuana, cocaine, ecstasy or just about any other drug you can name." Stephanie Moran, program director at the Governor's Prevention Partnership, is concerned, saying: "There's one track that actually mimics driving under the influence of alcohol. There's other ones for crystal meth, cocaine, heroin, all different kinds of drugs." But NBC Connecticut tosses a wet blanket on the smoldering panic halfway through the piece:

It's no secret that music can affect one's mood, and binaural beats do exist, but doctors said there's no scientific basis that binaural beats can get you high.

"Saying it will induce specific recreational drug experiences, it's really a hoax in my opinion," Dr. Daniyal Ibrahim, chief of toxicology at St. Francis Hospital, said. "There is no logical basis to suggest that somehow listening to sound that will simulate a neurochemical change that a drug is predictably doing to kids."

What videotaped experiences on YouTube show is the power of suggestion, he said.

"I think it's what we call the placebo effect," Ibrahim said.

But even though "i-dosing" does not really work and has no known negative side effects, that does not mean parents shouldn't worry about it:

The big fear is that experimenting with digital drugs might make some teens more curious to experience the real thing, especially those who are on the fence and might not want to try any illegal drug.

Dr. Ibrahim said it's a dangerous, slippery slope.

"To me, it's really a gateway for inciting kids to try real drugs that's my biggest concern," he said.

Experts say that, although no studies have been done on digital drugs, "i-dosing" promotes drug use, so parents should discuss it with their children.

Nice save, NBC Connecticut! A slippery slope and a gateway: I-dosing is no big deal by itself, but it might lead to pot smoking, which also is no big deal by itself but might lead to heroin addiction. Here are some other things that should be discouraged because they might stimulate a desire to use drugs: dreaming, meditation, religious ecstasy, spinning in a circle, vigorous exercise, and local news coverage.

More on digital drugs.


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  1. Oh noes!,,,,,,, Slippery slope! We need a law for the childrunz!

    1. Which you will happily enforce.

  2. “it’s (eDrugs) really a gateway”

    remember mary jane juwanas is now an interior door…or a hinge or something

      1. That’s a shame PFC Dipshit, I thought that comment was the closest you’ve come to be clever.

  3. Christ, the fun H. L. Mencken would have nowdays…

    1. If he hadn’t died from a rage-induced aneurysm first.

  4. Digital Drugs

    “Wanna do some Buffout? How about some Psycho?”

    1. “It’s real easy. All you do is run around a magical forest and shoot simulated heroin. You could call it the ultimate first-person shooter.”

      1. You know what’s hilarious about that? I actually envisioned shooting arrows at heroin needles before I read the last sentence.

        1. I think that was an Atari game back in the day. I think it was called Horse Kong.

        2. I was imagining the needles were the arrows.

        3. There was that awesome game NARC where the psychotic drug dealers tossed hypodermic needles at you.

      2. “Nobody plays Heroin Hero just a little! You know, you never catch the dragon!”

    2. Nuke is my favorite fictional drug.

  5. Doesn’t this retarded fucking meme come up about every 3 years? I swear I’ve heard this stupidity before.

    Reason numero uno for absolutely ignoring local news: youth drug stories.

    1. To your first question: yes.

      I remember back in the day they called them “alpha waves” or some such nonsense. Me and a buddy downloaded one in the 90’s (it took a really long time but was free) and were really disappointed; it does nothing. Cough medicine works much better.

      I don’t know if you remember this or not, but they used to sell “research chemicals” online. All these weird, but legal, substances that would be listed by chemical name and price could be bought freely. You’d have to send a money order in and the package would take so long that just as you begun to think that you’d been beat your chemicals would arrive. Good times.

      Shulgin is an American hero.

      1. Cheers to that. They always came labeled “For Laboratory Use Only”

      2. Yeah, I had a laboratory set as a kid and it had all kinds of good shit in it.

        Me and a buddy downloaded one in the 90’s (it took a really long time but was free) and were really disappointed; it does nothing

        Well…DUH. Of course it does nothing. The idea that it can is so bonecrushingly stupid that it amazes me these news organizations aren’t utterly embarrassed to even mention it.

        1. But today’s alpha waves are far more potent than the ones you remember growing up. They have 3.2 times the electromagnetism.

          1. Put simply, in deference to you, Tulpa, it’s like lasing a stick of Thai Stick.

        2. All the bottles in my chemistry set were labeled “Harmful if swallowed,” save one, cobalt chloride, which was labeled “Can be fatal if swallowed.” I know nothing about cobalt chloride, but I still fondly remember my little bottle.

  6. Fucking November. Nothing but new drugs, child kidnappings, and irreversibly scarred little old ladies being taken advantage of by evil corporations, the solution to all of which is apparently more government power. I hate sweeps.

  7. Man, other people are so stupid!

  8. Statist MSM scare stories make me violently ill. Does that make them gateways to poison?

    1. News shows are a gateway to stupidity. People buy into this shit.

  9. “I think it’s what we call the placebo effect,” Ibrahim said.

    Obviously, we must ban placebos!

    Support the Placebo Awareness Now Information Committee!

    1. Placebo Awareness Now Information Committee


    2. In Soviet Russia, Placebo bans you!

    3. Placebos should’ve been the very first thing banned. Their effects are totally unpredictable.

  10. Listening to Adam Levine makes me puke and crap my pants at the same time… there just may be something to this.

    1. Gravol and Depends.

  11. Anybody listen to Lulu, the new Lou Reed/Metallica album?

    I love it — everyone else really hates it!

    1. the new Lou Reed/Metallica album

      Let’s see… Metallica hasn’t done anything good in, oh, 15-20 years and Lou hasn’t done anything good since the early 70’s…nope, I ain’t interested.

      1. Metallica went radio-friendly and subsequently became irrelevant.

        I dig concept albums (which this is).

        1. Still not interested.
          Not saying you shouldn’t be…

          1. Listening to the album really gets you high.

    2. Lou Reed sounds (or at least sounded) like Jim Stafford with stage fright.

  12. How dare people experience sensual pleasure whilst in this earthly, profane realm?

    1. u mean pleasures like thanksgiving?when we saved ur sorry kicked-out asses fm starving? which you repaid by desecrating our graves & stealing our corn? punk bitches…

  13. If kids believe that the iPot mimics the effects of marijuana, and then fail to get high while listening to it, isn’t that going to make them less likely to bother with marijuana?

    By Ibrahim’s logic, if you’ve never had crab but one day eat imitation crab and hate it, that will make you want to eat the real thing.

    1. Analogy fail by Tulpa.

      Is H&R a gateway drug?

  14. There’s no such thing as a gateway drug.

    1. What about a getaway drug? 😉

  15. Apparently also intelligence.…..2.abstract

    1. May have something to do with coping with the surrounding studity.

  16. Here are some other things that should be discouraged because they might stimulate a desire to use drugs: dreaming, meditation, religious ecstasy, spinning in a circle, vigorous exercise, and local news coverage.

    Don’t forget masturbatin’!


    “Talk-show host and comedian Bill Maher makes an early acting appearance as the villainous Haskel. He sports a tiny, evil ponytail.”

  18. I prefer Jenkem anyways

    1. Did you ever see that 1000 ways to die episode about that? That’s messed up.

  19. “for as little as $1, you can download audio files…

    The Opeth tracks I just downloaded were only $0.99…they are altering my mind as I type.

  20. Video LSD on Youtube. It really works (for a couple of seconds).

  21. I remember the Satanic Panic of the 80s, and how silly that turned out to be. This is just another Satanic Panic, and it will pass as the first one did so long ago.

  22. Only we could come up with something as stupid as this. God bless America.

  23. I can’t understand why Reason is so ignorant of the actual science, of the problems with the IPCC, and of the level of corruption in the climate field.

  24. Listening to binaural frequencies doesn’t do nothing, but it sure as shit doesn’t get you high. You might fall asleep or forget what you were worrying about, but not get high. But that’s all people listen to them for.

    On an unrelated note, I wonder whether the purveyors of these “digital drugs” are just playing a huge practical joke on the drug warrior state. Next week or so, they might appear on the news and say something to the effect of: “Christ! You dumb shits will break out into a frenzied panic about *anything* if we call it a drug”. That would be hilarious.

  25. Sure, comparing binaural beats to drugs is goddamn ridiculous, but that doesn’t mean that any perceived effect attributed to them is necessarily due to the placebo effect. Audio visual frequency emissions can definitely effect the brain and illicit neurotransmitter or even hormonal release. Remember those boxes that would emit a sound frequency that could only be heard by teenagers and was absolutely unbearable to them? The Mosquito? I believe they were being used at some point to repel loitering troublemakers in crime ridden areas. Or how about infrasound? Look that one up. Pretty interesting. There’s definitely sound scientific evidence to support the notion that sounds can influence one’s state of consciousness and possibly even cause hallucinations. The military uses sound emissions as weapons, and they even employ them in torture sessions. You think they’d be interested in sonic effects on consciousness if they were placebo? Obviously trying to ban “sounds” OR drugs is beyond stupid, but that doesn’t mean people should blindly dismiss them as snake oil. In my opinion, that’s pretty goddamn stupid behavior in its own right. Why believe some doctor’s untested guess? There’s plenty of scientific evidence to support that they have an effect on brainwaves and can be useful for mood alteration. Maybe there’s a vested interest in trying to prevent people from finding out they don’t need certain prescription medications. Ever think of that? Why is that any less believable? Not saying it’s true, but use your fucking heads a bit, jeez.

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