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Hillary Clinton Wants to Send Citizens to Camps—Fun Camps!

Politician famous for humorlessness says we have a "fun deficit."

The punchlines write themselves on this one, and that's exactly what's happening. Hillary Clinton, soon to announce her candidacy for president, spoke last night before the American Camp Association in New Jersey. In an effort to try to connect with her audience, she said, "We really need to have camps for adults. … None of the serious stuff. None of the life challenge stuff. More fun. I think we have a huge 'fun deficit' in America."

So Clinton hands over to us all to consider the idea of a progressive sending adults to camps, and the idea of a politician infamous for being humorless and suspicious being an arbiter of "fun," wrapped in a great big bow. Obviously conservatives are having a field day, and #HillaryFunCamp is trending on Twitter.

Here's Daily Caller:

In these camps, Clinton wants Americans to really concentrate on the important things. "We need some reminder about life skills from time to time, maybe some enrichment, certainly some time outdoors."

On an entirely unrelated note, "joycamp" was the Newspeak term for forced labor camps in George Orwell's 1984.

Here are her comments in video form:

And here is Camille Paglia's rant about Clinton from Reason's lengthy interview with her posted earlier today:

What do you imagine happening at a Hillary Clinton camp? One thing's for sure: No emails.

Photo Credit: NBC 10

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  • Swiss Servator... Switzy!||

    At this camp, would you gain strength through joy?

  • Caput Lupinum||

    Arbeit Spielend macht frei!

  • ||

    How can she be this fucking tone-deaf and stupid? Is this fucking mongoloid really going to run for president?

    Mrs. Choksondik: Kyle, if you are going to be in my classroom you're going to have to concentrate.

    Cartman: Maybe we should send him to concentration camp!

  • Swiss Servator... Switzy!||

    Excellent - someone could redo that will Hillary photoshopped in as Mrs. Chosindik.

  • Plàya Manhattan.||

    If we're gonna get straight up gross here, how about an honest game of "Who would you rather?"?

  • ||

    I'd rather not.

  • Swiss Servator... Switzy!||

    Is Death an option?

  • DEATFBIRSECIA||

    Would you rather fuck her or see her become President?

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    "I'll be willing to give up my Presidential aspirations if one of you studs agrees to..."

    "I have to be going, Mrs. President!" "No thanks, Mrs. President!" "Hail to the Chief!"

  • Sudden||

    I'll choose the pig-fucking option

  • The Last American Hero||

    I was a worse person for having watched that episode.

  • JPyrate||

    I do not even have to click on that link to know what episode that is.

  • Sudden||

    The question should be phrased as follows:

    If having sex with Hillary Clinton were the only way to prevent her from becoming president, where in Canada would you move?

  • HeteroPatriarch||

    Rule 34. Someone, somewhere would throw a bone in her. Not Bill, but someone.

  • John||

    Seriously. How can people think this woman is a shoo in to be President? She is such a bad candidate, even Republicans can make her look like a buffoon.

  • fish||

    ....even Republicans can make her look like a buffoon.

    Why would they bother? She's doing such a competent job all by herself!

    (Still think she's going to win though)

  • JPyrate||

    Vermin Supreme. He is our only hope.

  • Enjoy Every Sandwich||

    The progs keep going on about how smart she is. I haven't seen her do one smart thing yet.

  • Rich||

    It's incredible. Right down to the choreographed cutesy facial expressions during her email press conference.

  • ColonelEngineer||

    Japanese-Americans get to attend the camps for free.

    ..........too soon?

  • Swiss Servator... Switzy!||

    Maybe.

  • ||

    Only for the one's who are grandfathered in.

  • SweatingGin||

    Will there be Re-neducation?

  • Lady Bertrum||

    I'm not a fan of Paglia's but she's right Hillary having no accomplishments other than marrying advantageously. And that's why it's ridiculous to consider her anything like a feminist icon. She had the opportunity to leverage her position as Bill wife into something greater but she failed to do that.

  • ||

    She's still trying, dude. Like, right now. Hopefully she will continue to fail.

  • Lady Bertrum||

    The very definition of failing upward.

  • kinnath||

    I already do this. It typically involves bottles and kegs.

  • Rich||

    "I think we have a huge 'fun deficit' in America."

    If Hillary becomes president I think we will have a huge 'fun surplus' in America.

  • JW||

    SON! AVENGE ME! HAVE FUN!

    HAAAAAAAVE FUUUUUN!!!!

  • albo||

    I larfed!

  • Swiss Servator... Switzy!||

    +1 Wolllllllllllllverines!

  • Plàya Manhattan.||

    This one time, at band camp, Episiarch [fill in the blank]!!!

  • Swiss Servator... Switzy!||

    _______________ your Mom!

  • ||

    I would definitely [fill in the blank] Alyson Hannigan.

  • From the Tundra||

    Audit?

  • ||

    Sure. "Audit". With my penis.

  • Lady Bertrum||

    Rub one off to an image of

  • Enjoy Every Sandwich||

    It would be amusing to ask her what she thinks fun is. I suspect that her answer would be a checklist of prog derp. Stuff that normal people think is fun would be verboten at Hillary Strength Through Joy camp.

  • Swiss Servator... Switzy!||

  • LarryA||

    Every camp I've ever been to/worked at had riflery and archery. Well, except for the Army camps; there was no archery but they had lots more fun stuff to shoot.

    I'm guessing Hilary's won't even have real campfires.

    But lots of plastic lace and pony beads. www.pinterest.com/samantha1578.....ce-crafts/

  • Francisco d'Anconia||

  • LarryA||

    Hilaryous.

  • ||

    nothing says fun like America's Ex-Wife.

  • albo||

    I'm stealing that one.

  • fish||

    Holy shit so am I!!

  • Swiss Servator... Switzy!||

    Moar Hillary!

    http://news.yahoo.com/exclusiv.....53450.html

    Oh, and is my face red...

    One instance was an admitted oversight, Daley said: CHAI should have told the State Department before accepting donations totaling $340,000 from Switzerland's Agency for Development and Cooperation in 2011 and 2012. However, it did not believe U.S. authorities needed to review the other six governments, including Britain and Australia, she said, citing various reasons.

  • Plàya Manhattan.||

    FYVR
    Fuck You, Various Reasons

  • Brochettaward||

    It was only 340k. That's a pittance. I mean, what are the campaign contribution limits, again?

  • Ken Shultz||

    "We really need to have camps for adults. … None of the serious stuff. None of the life challenge stuff. More fun. I think we have a huge 'fun deficit' in America."

    Imelda Marcos thinks women need more cute shoes to choose from.

    "So Clinton hands over to us all to consider the idea of a progressive sending adults to camps"

    I'm sure the headline writers over at Salon are whipping up a column defending sending every adult to progressive fun camp, right now.

    I wonder what people would do at progressive fun camp?

    Water skiing is elitist, isn't it?

    And campfires are probably ecologically irresponsible.

    If horse riding is too cruel for Central Park, I'm sure it's too cruel for progressive fun camp.

    Other than threatening climate change skeptics with vaccines and FEMA camps, what do progressives do for fun?

    Outside of a gay bar, has anyone ever actually witnessed a progressive having fun?

  • GILMORE||

    "has anyone ever actually witnessed a progressive having fun?"

    7 HOURS OF DRUM CIRCLE!!!

    its like Woodstock, without the talent

  • ||

    "In my professional opinion, we're looking at a full-blown hippie jamfest the size of which we've never seen."

  • Paul.||

    oooh, a 7 hour pro-government pep rally... it's like having All Things Considered on permanent loop!

  • Enjoy Every Sandwich||

    Progressive Poetry contests! Socialist sing-alongs! LGBT luaus! What could be more fun!

  • SugarFree||

    The Three-Legged Race For Disability Diversity

  • GILMORE||

    I have now modified my prior position expressing skepticism about Sudden's prediction of "Hillary Implosion" to =

    "WHAT THE FUCK?"

    She seems to have decided that "crazy old woman" is the angle to deflect any possible criticism. HAVE SOME CANDY!! YOU LOVE CANDY!! She should carry a cat around with her wherever she goes, and then suddenly declare it her "running mate"

  • John||

    And you know what the best part is? She still might get the nomination out of sheer bull headed determination and the lack of any alternative. This could end up being the greatest traveling freakshow in American political history. The election is still 19 months away. What if it just keeps getting worse and she gets the nomination anyway?

  • Paul.||

    I'd hardly call Joe Biden a 'lack of alternative'. He's a shoo-in!

  • Swiss Servator... Switzy!||

    HILLARY/CHAIRMAN MEOW 2016!

  • ||

    She's like a more incompetent Dr. Evil. They both wear the same pantsuits, she can get a supervillain cat, Chelsea is basically Mini-Me, and they both say amazingly stupid things.

    "One BILLION villages...ha ha ha ha!"

  • John||

    And the Progs can't admit that. They may still nominate her. IN fact, I bet they do.

  • Paul.||

    Hell, I'd give even odds she'll be your next president...

  • DEATFBIRSECIA||

    On the hole, Preparation Hillary feels good.

  • Enjoy Every Sandwich||

    Of course a prog like Hillary would want the fun doled out at a "camp"; in other words, "organized fun" (one of the biggest fucking oxymorons in existence). Led by "caring adults" no doubt. The idea of individuals finding their own fun fills her with horror.

  • DEATFBIRSECIA||

    Remember in Job: A Comedy of Justice, where Alex gets to heaven, gets his wings, starts trying to fly around on his own, only to be told that they all have to fly in formation?

    That's what I'm thinking it's like at Camp Hillary.

  • Rich||

  • John||

    And just think, we can have a crusade to stop the rape culture going on at America's adult fun camps.

  • SugarFree||

    I remember the first time I fell in love at summer fun camp. Her name was April and most of the flesh on her face had been eaten away by beetles. It made her cheekbones jut out like the twin bows of a weathered catamaran. She was beautiful, twirling in the grey light of the sun until she was sick. She would comb her hair for me, at least until when all fell out. I told her the sores on her scalp were prettier than hair, anyway.

    The guards didn't whip her much anymore, or just gave the one she should have gotten to me. She was just too fragile. Even the guards love her a little bit. They told us that come September they were going to let us go. April believed them, her face bleeding when she smiled.

    She could still speak, after a fashion, if you got in real close to catch the papery whispers sliding past what was left of her lips. She would tell me that she loved me, and that she wanted me to be the one to kill her. I told her to stop being silly.

    She died the first day it started to rain.

  • ||

    That's exactly like my first camp love!

  • SugarFree||

    This is why rumors persist that you are merely a figment of my imagination.

  • ||

    They're not rumors. I have to keep reminding you that I'm not real. It's getting tiresome.

  • SugarFree||

    Who said that? Show yourself!

  • ||

    (taps NutraSweet on the other shoulder)

  • Mainer2||

    You remind me of this little short film.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bvGwO1ead3Q

    The Dark Companion.

  • kinnath||

    I am in awe of your talent ;-)

  • ||

    That's beautiful, Sug.

  • SugarFree||

    Try to get shipped to Fun Camp Colorado. I hear it's very mellow.

  • Sudden||

    Nothing like the beauty of prisoner 24290Zed

  • GILMORE||

    Let them eat camp?

  • Derpetologist||

    Usually, I hate how some silly stray remark will be in the news for weeks while actions get ignored.

    However, the stupidity of her comment is mind boggling. The government should send people to camps? She really thought that wouldn't get taken the wrong way?

    It's amazing what you can get with doing and saying if you can give enough people a warm, fuzzy feeling.

    Or in Bill's case, filling.

  • trshmnster the terrible||

    Yeah, there are things that citizens are generally sensitive to. One is using the military to force Congress into session (McConnell). Another is sending people to camps (Hilldawg).

    Politics 101: don't talk about coup de etat or gulags.

  • Whahappan?||

    Nitpick: it was Lindsey Graham who suggested using the military to keep Congress in session.

  • Paul.||

    She really thought that wouldn't get taken the wrong way?

    I think the problem is it's being taken the right way.

  • ||

    The thing that scares me is that the progs will refuse to criticize her for this, even though they know she's spouting idiocy. In typical prog fashion they will convince themselves that they have been wrong all along about the camps thing, and that She has the answer.

    We are so fucked.

  • ||

    "I think we have a huge 'fun deficit' in America."

    Are camps 'fun neutral'?

    Other than that.

    What the fuck is wrong with this lady?

  • Stormy Dragon||

    We really need to have camps for adults. … None of the serious stuff. None of the life challenge stuff. More fun. I think we have a huge 'fun deficit' in America.

    Isn't this pretty much the market pleasure cruises are filling?

  • SugarFree||

    Everyone talks about the fun deficit, but few contemplate our nightmarish levels of fun debt.

  • Sevo||

    Onion wouldn't DARE write anything like this.

  • ||

    It's gone beyond satire into pure... oh, what's the word?

    You know; "sophisticated, knowing amusement, as by virtue of its being artlessly mannered or stylized, self-consciously artificial and extravagant, or teasingly ingenuous and sentimental".

    Dang it.

  • ||

    you know who else...

  • Beautiful Bean Footage||

    The YMCA?

  • trshmnster the terrible||

    ... set up camp all across the nation?

    Lewis and Clark

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    Robert Baden-Powell?

  • The Last American Hero||

    Yes, and the camps for the good people were profiled on James May's Cars of the People Episode. Loads of fun, everyone packed into their little cells, er rooms, listening to State owned radio at a State owned hotel eating the same food, and reading State approved books.

  • The Male Gaze™||

    first rule of politically named things, it is always the opposite of what the name says.

  • SKR||

    I WILL NOT GO TO RAINBOWLAND!!!!111!!

  • ||

    At least my camp _is_ fun: car chases, motorcycles, shooting darts, an acceptance of alternative lifestyles, and a lust for guzzoline.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    I'm not saying it's always like this, but lots of times the parents want their kids out of their hair, so they send them to summer camp - "it will be fun!" - without necessarily caring whether it's *really* fun.

    So who will be sending adults to camp with the assurance that "it will be fun!"

  • The Bearded Hobbit||

    Good morning, campers!
    I'm your Uncle Ernie and I welcome you to Hillary's Holiday Camp!
    The camp with a difference
    Never mind the weather
    When you're at Hillary's
    The holiday's forever!

    ... Hobbit

  • The Last American Hero||

    Maybe a Team Red version of Biden could give a speech to a Jewish Group and say "They're gonna put y'all back in camps."

  • LarryA||

    Dear Hillary, We do indeed have a "fun deficit" in the U.S. of A.

    It's primarily because Certain People are Progressively making every sort of inexpensive fun illegal, and screwing up the economy so nobody can afford the good fun.

  • JPyrate||

    Oh great. "Fun Camps" =D

  • JPyrate||

    I'm not sure if this is Libertarian paranoia, Progressive seriousness, or general insanity. "Fun Camps", and people wonder why I am an Anarchist.

  • JPyrate||

  • JPyrate||

    Vermin Supreme. The Dark Pony candidate, is a sure "Boot In" for the Democratic election. =D

  • Invisible Finger||

    I think we have a huge 'fun deficit' in America."

    Yes wedo. It's the by-product of a federal government 3000x bigger than it should be.

  • Jonathan Swifter||

    Bill wants to hold a camp too.

    Up in New York, at Bare Mountain.


    https://www.facebook.com/AToZofAmerica

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