Brickbat: A Failure to Communicate

Lucio Delgado was proud to have the chance to become a U.S. citizen. But his dreams were dashed when he flunked the reading portion of the naturalization test. Delgado is blind, but examiners refused to provide that portion of the exam in Braille. Delgado says he was told he would have to bring a doctor's note saying he was blind, something he says he can't afford.

Comments

[Jerryskids]

Just have somebody sneak up behind him and smack him in the head, see if he turns around to see who hit him. If he turns around, punch him in the face and see if he flinches as you’re throwing the punch. Then aim a kick at his nuts, see if he instinctively covers his crotch. I don’t know what you’d do to Delgado to prove he’s blind.

[Fist of Etiquette]

The linked article doesn’t include any comment from government officials.

[JJANAVYVET]

The reporter gave you a comment that the government officials gave him…they do not comment on individual cases…

[Fist of Etiquette]

I LOOKED AT IT TWICE. HOW DID I MISS IT.

[Will Nonya]

First it was fake glasses now it’s fake blindness. Damned hipsters.

Everyone knows the braile versions of the test are easier. Dude’s just trying to cheat his way in.

Effing retarded bureaucrats, making America great.

[MatthewSlyfield]

Reading braile is very different. Very few people who aren’t blind get trained to do it.

Why the fuck would a non-blind person who is trying to pass a test ask for the braile version?

[$parcasmic, a love connection]

Would you understand that he was joking if it was written in braille?

[MatthewSlyfield]

No. Nobody understands when you are joking on the internet. 😛

[Cyto]

The best part is… if you can read it in braille, you can read. That is a subset of all reading.

The reverse is not true… I can read just fine, but I ain’t readin’ braille, that’s for sure.

I’m reminded of Don Knotts in “No Time for Sergeants”. He’s giving the military intelligence test which involves solving a pair of puzzle rings. He’s totally flummoxed by Andy Griffith’s solution of bending the rings apart and bending them back together. “There’s only supposed to be one way to do it, and he didn’t do it that way…”

[Ben of Houston]

The man filed a lawsuit against the federal government.
I can think of nothing more American than that. We need to keep him.

[docduracoat]

I am a medical doctor.
I would be glad to write the note for him for free.
Have him call me

[SQRLSY One]

You want to have him call you what? Call your Shirley?

(Me? No, surely do NOT call me Shirley! SURELY call me Your Majesty Dude-Sir, SIR!)

[$parcasmic, a love connection]

You’re not remotely funny or interesting and you told us you eat shit.

[SQRLSY One]

“Dear Abby” is a personal friend of mine. She gets some VERY strange letters! For my amusement, she forwards some of them to me from time to time. Here is a relevant one:

Dear Abby, Dear Abby,
My life is a mess,
Even Bill Clinton won’t stain my dress,
I whinny seductively for the horses,
They tell me my picnic is short a few courses,
My real name is Mary Stack,
NO ONE wants my hairy crack!
On disability, I live all alone,
Spend desperate nights by the phone,
I found a man named Richard Decker,
But he won’t give me his hairy pecker!
Decker’s pecker is reserved for farm beasts,
I am beastly, yes! But my crack’s full of yeasts!

So Dear Abby, that’s just a poetic summary… You can read about the Love of my Life, Richard Decker, here:
https://www.washingtonpost.com/nation/2019/10/11/farmers-kept-refusing-let-him-have-sex-with-their-animals-so-he-sought-revenge-authorities-say/#comments-wrapper
Farmers kept refusing to let him have sex with their animals. So he sought revenge, authorities say.
Decker the hairy pecker told me a summary of his story as below:
Decker: “Can I have sex with your horse?”
Farmer: “Lemme go ask the horse.”
Pause…
Farmer: “My horse says ‘neigh’!”
And THAT was straight from the horse’s mouth! I’m not horsin’ around, here, no mare!

So Decker the hairy pecker told me that, apparently never even realizing just HOW DEEPLY it hurt me, that he was all interested in farm beasts, while totally ignoring MEEE!!

So I thought maybe I could at least liven up my lonely-heart social life, by refining my common interests that I share with Richard Decker… I, too, like to have sex with horses!

But Dear Abby, the horses ALL keep on saying “neigh” to my whinnying sexual advances!
Some tell me that my whinnying is too whiny… Abby, I don’t know how to fix it!

Dear Abby, please don’t tell me “get therapy”… I can’t afford it on my disability check!

Now, along with my crack full of yeasts… I am developing anorexia! Some are calling me a “quarter pounder with cheese”, but they are NOT interested at ALL, in eating me!!! They will NOT snack on my crack!

What will I DO, Dear Abby?!?!?

-Desperately Seeking Horses, Men, or ANYTHING, in Fort Worth,
Yours Truly,
Mary Stack / Tulpa / Mary’s Period / “.” / Satan

[$parcasmic, a love connection]

You told us you eat shit. Write all you want, it won’t ever go away.

[Social Justice is Neither One]

He did say that.

[SQRLSY One]

Liar! Liars are like sand fleas around here… Just covering the place!

https://reason.com/2019/09/15/outgrowing-addiction/#comments
SQRLSY One
September.15.2019 at 4:21 pm
Right along with my urges to eat shit and then barf. Fortunately, I strangle these thoughts in their crib. Too bad that no one thought of doing that with Tulpa… But that would be “pre-crime” punishment, which I generally do NOT subscribe to!
End original quote.
An attempt at humor. I don’t REALLY have urges to eat poop. And having an URGE to eat poop is NOT the same thing as eating poop, except in the eyes of total liars!
Ever have an urge to kill some asshole? Then you are a MURDERER, according to your type of lying!

[Quo Usque Tandem]

Take your f’n meds you bipolar/manic son of a bitch.

[darkflame]

Well THIS seems legit. *stands in a dark alley* Hey kid, ya want some… prescriptions?

[Ben of Houston]

The agency refused an eye exam from an optometrist, requiring him to go to an ophthalmologist.

[Azathoth!!]

The term ‘legally blind’, slipped so nonchalantly into the article is important.

Because ‘legally blind’ is very different from blind.

Legally blind means that your vision is 20/200 or worse.

It means that you have some sight.

Often it means that you can read with your eyes.

But there’s a very huge red flag in this story—

But his dreams were dashed when he flunked the reading portion of the naturalization test.

It’s a written test. If he can take one portion he can take every portion. He couldn’t have just flunked ‘the reading portion’.

Someone’s pushing a narrative.

[sarcasmic]

Can you write with your eyes closed?

[jcw]

Someone’s pushing a narrative

Okay kettle.

[darkflame]

Good catch.

[Kevin Smith]

It’s a written test.

No, its not. Two of the four parts are spoken, the third is writing, which a blind person can do. Reading is the only one that would pose an issue for a blind person

[American Mongrel]

My doctor will have his nurse write me a note without an appointment and for no fee. I feel like this guy is full of shit.

[Rossami]

Your doctor. As in, you already have a doctor. Someone who will do things for you for free because he/she already has a paid relationship with you. Very few doctors will do the same for random strangers off the street.

[Ben of Houston]

According to another article, they did have a large print version, but he isn’t just legally blind, he’s totally blind. Pictures of him show his eyes are completely clouded. It’s almost cartoonish how obvious it is that the man cannot see.

This is patently absurd six ways from Sunday. Why should he have to even prove that he’s blind? If a person wants to take the reading test in Braille just to show off, let them. Braille is written English.

[sarcasmic]

Why not have someone read it to the guy? Be a lot cheaper than republishing the test with raised dots on it.

[Kevin Smith]

Because that defeats the purpose of testing if he is able to read English

[Ben of Houston]

According to USCIS.gov, they already have a braille test, and braille study materials available on their website. They even have an entire policy for the deaf, mute, and wheelchair bound.

I am not understanding any of this. It’s like they just refused to give him what they already had for no discernable reason.

[MatthewSlyfield]

“It’s like they just refused to give him what they already had for no discernable reason.”

Ding Ding Ding. This is the correct Answer. Government in action.

[cgr2727]

Guess he doesn’t have a seeing eye dog, because there’s no mention of it being shot while he was swarmed by ICE agents who thought he was a terrorist for asking for a “secret coded message” known to most of us as braille.

[Eddy]

So they’re worried he may be illiterate, feigning blindness in order to cover it up, but able to read Braille? Either the article is missing some key element or the bureaucrats are missing some key element.

[Jima]

Hey, I’m sorry the guy is blind, but why do we need to make him an American citizen? Is there a big demand for blind folks in the USA? He’d immediately become a drain on an already bankrupt welfare system. Do we really need to import blind people?

[Eddy]

I don’t know, but he knows braille, which is designed to help the blind function productively in society.

[Eddy]

…and if the article is correct, the issue at hand was his literacy. Which, if he knows braille, would be enough to qualify him for various jobs.