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A.M. Links: Government Shutdown Ends, Cory Booker Wins New Jersey Senate Seat, Nirvana a Nominee For Rock and Roll Hall of Fame

Zenon Evans | 10.17.2013 9:00 AM

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    The government shutdown is over. By an overwhelming margin, the Senate passed a bill to fund the government and raise the debt ceiling. The bill was later passed by the House and signed by President Obama. For the role he played, Sen. Mitch McConnell (R-Ky.) is taking flak from Tea Party members and his potential primary opponent. The bill was sprinkled with pork barrel spending, including $175,000 for the widow of the late Sen. Frank Lautenberg. During the House's vote, a stenographer had a rambling outburst about Freemasons.

  • Newark Mayor Cory Booker has won a special election to represent New Jersey in the U.S. Senate.
  • Motivated by the possibility of a pay raise or, alternatively, getting fired, public school teachers in Washington, D.C. are improving under a complex evaluation system. 
  • In a first of a kind study, The Global Slavery Index 2013 has determined that there are slaves in 162 countries, including the United States, Canada, and Western European nations.
  • A bombing in north-west Pakistan during the Muslim festival of Eid al-Adha killed a provincial lawmaker and seven others.
  • Nirvana has been nominated to enter the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Other first-time nominees this year include Linda Ronstadt, Peter Gabriel, Hall & Oates, and Yes.

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NEXT: NSA and CIA Work Together on Drone Strikes

Zenon Evans is a former Reason staff writer and editor.

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  1. Fist of Etiquette   12 years ago

    During the House's vote, a stenographer had a rambling outburst about Freemasons.

    She figured if everyone else in the House is going to make pointless stands she might as well get in on the action.

    1. Rich   12 years ago

      "He will not be mocked," the woman repeatedly said. "The greatest deception here is this is not one nation under God. It never was. The constitution would not have been written by freemasons. They go against God. You cannot serve two masters." It was unclear what prompted the outburst and the woman was led away by House staff shot by Capitol police.

      FTFY

      1. CE   12 years ago

        Wait, I thought the Constitution was written by FreeMasons, who served Lucifer. Are my conspiracy theory sources out of date? If only there were a book on paranoia in the USA!

    2. Bee Tagger   12 years ago

      Ted Cruz has elevated filibustering to a true art form.

    3. Brett L   12 years ago

      BuSab!

      1. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

        Too sophisticated to even begin to understand.

    4. Enough About Palin   12 years ago

      When I worked at Honeywell, we would have these all-hands HR meetings in the auditorium. Well one time, in the middle of one of those meetings, a woman got up and began speaking in tongues. I figure the auditorium was similar to a large church and that's what triggered it for her.

      1. tarran   12 years ago

        So what was the aftermath like?

        I imagine things were awkward around the water cooler for a while.

        1. Enough About Palin   12 years ago

          It was discussed, that's for sure.

  2. Snark Plissken   12 years ago

    Nirvana has been nominated to enter the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Other first-time nominees this year include Linda Ronstadt, Peter Gabriel, Hall & Oates, and Yes.

    Hall & Oates are rock'n'roll?

    1. Smilin' Joe Fission   12 years ago

      Madonna apparently is.

    2. Longtorso, Johnny   12 years ago

      Live from Daryl's House
      Daryl Hall started Live From Daryl's House, the free monthly web show in late 2007, after having the idea of "playing with my friends and putting it up on the Internet," and the show has since garnered acclaim from Rolling Stone, SPIN, Daily Variety, CNN, BBC, Yahoo! Music and influential blogger Bob Lefsetz, who cited Live From Daryl's House as a perfect example of a veteran artist reinventing himself in the digital age by collaborating with both established colleagues and newer performers....

    3. a better weapon   12 years ago

      The term Rock n Roll has always been used loosely when it comes to music awards.

      Also, has there been a song from the last 50 years that has been used more often in film montages then 'You Make My Dreams Come True' by HnO?

    4. Troy muy grande boner   12 years ago

      I think the Bee Gees made it in. I am submitting my application for the introduction of the Bay City Rollers.

      1. Longtorso, Johnny   12 years ago

        S-A-T-U-R-D-A-Y, Night!

        1. Bobarian   12 years ago

          AAUGHH!!!

          Fucking brain worm!

          You, Sir, are lower than Congress or Whale Shit.

          I'll be repeating those letters all day, now [S-A, T-U-R, D-A-Y, Night]

          1. KMA Too   12 years ago

            Yes, it really puts the "turd" in Saturday...

      2. Snark Plissken   12 years ago

        Right May, turn off the Bay City Rollers! The soccer game's about to begin!

      3. SIV   12 years ago

        The Bee Gees were a Beatlesque pop-rock band before the disco success.

    5. John   12 years ago

      There isn't a white guy soul hall of fame. So they got to go somewhere.

      1. GILMORE   12 years ago

        The Righteous Brothers keep Michael McDonald tied up in their garage, so there's that

    6. thom   12 years ago

      The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame seems to consider all popular music to be "Rock and Roll" except for dance/electronic music and country music made after 1980.

      1. Pelosi's Accommodator   12 years ago

        I'm good with that.

      2. robc   12 years ago

        And prog.

        Although that is starting to change, finally.

    7. Thane of Steelport   12 years ago

      I visited the Rock 'n Roll Hall of Fame Museum recently.

      Don't go. It sucks.

      1. AlmightyJB   12 years ago

        In enjoyed it immensely. 3 or 4 hours at a time were plenty though. I wouldn't travel to Cleveland from afar for just that. I will definately go back. Had a Stones exhibit when I was there which was great.

        1. PD Scott   12 years ago

          Regrettably I only went to one museum in Cleveland - the Crawford Auto Aviation Collection at the Western Reserve Historical Society. If you want to see cars from the earliest days to the (almost) present, they have a nice assortment.

          The Rock and Roll H of F seemed? dinky from the outside.

      2. CE   12 years ago

        I saved myself the trip to Cleveland and the inevitable let-down at the museum, and just popped an old Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers CD into my 1990s era boombox.

        1. CE   12 years ago

          Anything that's rock 'n' roll's fine.

    8. robc   12 years ago

      The fact that Yes is a first time nominee tells you everything that is wrong with the Rock and Roll HoF.

      1. JW   12 years ago

        Wrong that they're being nominated at all or wrong that it took them this long?

        1. robc   12 years ago

          This long.

          They should have been in at their 25th anniversary.

          All of the great prog bands have been kept out.

          1. Marc F Cheney   12 years ago

            Who besides Yes? Crimson? I thought Genesis was already in, and Rush, if you want to count them.

            If you think Marillion's getting in, let alone the likes of Gentle Giant, you got another thing coming.

            1. robc   12 years ago

              Rush was this year though. Another that should have been in a long time ago.

              Yes and KC and Tull would satisfy me.

              1. Marc F Cheney   12 years ago

                Forgot about Tull. I agree, I don't expect any more or less than that.

                Then again, I don't really care.

    9. Max Power   12 years ago

      I can't go for that. No can do.

      1. GILMORE   12 years ago

        NOOOOOO-ahhh

      2. Copernicus   12 years ago

        Search for Adam Carolla ranting on Loveline about H+O "maneater". Really funny. I'm too lazy to link it for you bastards.

    10. GILMORE   12 years ago

      I SHALL NOT REST UNTIL PHIL COLLINS RULES THEM ALL

      1. CE   12 years ago

        He already does.

        1. GILMORE   12 years ago

          Oh. Good then. Just checking.

    11. GILMORE   12 years ago

      "Hall & Oates are rock'n'roll?"

      Are you suggesting that you cant go for that?

    12. CE   12 years ago

      Linda Rondstadt is? I thought she sang pop.

    13. Copernicus   12 years ago

      Rush just got in and Yes is not yet in? Sorry Nirvana needs to wait for 40 years or even better, forever.

  3. Fist of Etiquette   12 years ago

    The bill was sprinkled with pork barrel spending, including $175,000 for the widow of the late Sen. Frank Lautenberg.

    Congress, where dumbfuckery has been elevated to an art form.

    1. Certified Public Asskicker   12 years ago

      Also:

      Another section of the bill hikes funding for projects along the Ohio River, portions of which flow through Illinois and Kentucky, states represented by Sen. Dick Durbin, D-Ill., and Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell, R-Ky.

      The bill boosts money for the projects by $2.1 billion, from an original $775 million to $2.9 billion: "Section 3(a)(6) of Public Law 100-676 is amended by striking both occurrences of '$775,000,000? and inserting in lieu thereof, '$2,918,000,000.'"

      Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, D-Nev., defended the Ohio River dam project, saying the project will actually save taxpayers money. "This is not an earmark. It saves the taxpayers lots of money and enables the Corps of Engineers to continue a project," Reid told reporters at a news conference Wednesday night.

      *Breaks down and sobs*

      1. Smilin' Joe Fission   12 years ago

        The notorious Government multiplier hard at work.

      2. Ted S.   12 years ago

        Nothing left to cut.

      3. creech   12 years ago

        Good to see that OGL compromised on that "clean bill" nonsense. Oh wait, that was "the world" demanding a clean bill, not OGL.

      4. AlmightyJB   12 years ago

        Reminds me of when my wife would go oj a shopping spree and come home and told me that I won't believe how much money she saved me.

    2. Drake   12 years ago

      How else was the widow of a man worth $60 million supposed to survive?

      1. Scruffy Nerfherder   12 years ago

        He was a HERO

    3. Scruffy Nerfherder   12 years ago

      What the fuckity fuck fuck?

      Could they be a just a little more brazen?

      1. WTF   12 years ago

        My reaction exactly. They don't even bother hiding their thievery anymore.

    4. Brett L   12 years ago

      This would kill the deal he had with Rand and Ted Cruz to not support a primary challenger, right?

      1. Swiss Servator, Zurichmania!   12 years ago

        God willing. Imma donate to any challenger.

  4. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

    If you don't eat yer meat, you can't have any pudding!

    Diner attacks restaurant with chainsaw

    A man who was thrown out of a restaurant later returned brandishing a chainsaw because he hadn't finished his dessert.

    Petr Svacha, 36, had been dining in the restaurant in Zlin, Czech Republic, with a friend. He was asked to leave at closing time, but then returned, claiming he wanted to finish his pudding.

    1. Restoras   12 years ago

      How can you have your pudding if you don't eat your meat??

      1. Smilin' Joe Fission   12 years ago

        A question as old as time. Will a scientific consensus ever be made?

        1. waffles   12 years ago

          No, Time was on Dark Side of the Moon. It's clearly older than The Wall.

          1. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

            I have seen "The Wall" too many damn times. Of course back in HS, when I was hanging out with two cheerleaders turned stoners, it seemed like a good idea. Whatever the gals wanted...

            1. Restoras   12 years ago

              How'd it work out? Did you score or get friend-zoned?

              1. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

                Hmmm... drunken make out with the hottest one who I was the most crazy about. Ended up being the 2-3mo boyfriend of the other.

                1. Restoras   12 years ago

                  So it worked out perfectly. Well done sir.

                2. Clich? Bandit   12 years ago

                  See you did it wrong. Ignore the "hotter" one while paying attention to the less hot one and BAM hot one drags you into a closet and face rapes you. Easy peasy

                  1. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

                    I did not have such wisdom back then.

    2. Ted S.   12 years ago

      PS: Weren't those the former initials of poster Snark Plissken? And he lives in the Czech Republic.

      1. Snark Plissken   12 years ago

        Why do you think I changed my moniker?

  5. Bee Tagger   12 years ago

    public school teachers in Washington, D.C. are improving under a complex evaluation system.

    How do we know the students aren't teaching the teachers to teach to the evaluation system?

    1. a better weapon   12 years ago

      +1 scantron

  6. Longtorso, Johnny   12 years ago

    The Lambda Factor
    ...Gay men (who did not realize their orientation until late) get divorced, they lose custody of their kids, they get fired and discriminated against because of their gender, just like straight men. Gay men have lost the same economic power that straight men have. Indeed, the vast majority of their non-gay-oriented interests and issues are identical to those of straight men. If it wasn't for the current political climate on the Right, I think we'd see a flood of gay men supporting male issues and interests. The very existence of the Log Cabin Republicans bears this out.

    And if you think YOU get pissed off about your taxes going to support entitlement programs for single mothers, you should just hear a table full of angry gay men discuss the subject. Ouch....

    1. Longtorso, Johnny   12 years ago

      ...It is time for the Manosphere to back off the homophobia and start recognizing our legitimate allies in this struggle. Gay men are not the enemy. They don't want to see every man turn gay. They don't even want to encourage more men to be gay, necessarily ? they just want to ensure that it is safe for men who are gay to be so without undue hardship. (The rest of us could stand to work out more . . . eye candy . . .) Their alliance with the Left is almost solely based around the single issue of gay rights, and once gay marriage and military service is off the table most are happy to get involved in issues of more interest to all men....

      1. Auric Demonocles   12 years ago

        I would be fine with a large percentage of other men turning gay.

        "Hello ladies.... In fact, I do enjoy intercourse with females!"

        1. Scruffy Nerfherder   12 years ago

          Patriarch!

          Hisses and points.

          1. Auric Demonocles   12 years ago

            That's true; in addition to less competition for women, there would be less competition for manly jobs like being a patriarch, executive, or president.

          2. Bobarian   12 years ago

            You are not supposed to hiss, you are supposed to open your mouth and wail like Donald Sutherland at the end of 'Invasion of the Body Snatchers' and then point.

        2. Ted S.   12 years ago

          Whatever turned a large percentage of men gay would probably also turn a large percentage of women lesbian. 😉

          1. Auric Demonocles   12 years ago

            I haven't seen any evidence that Golden Girls turns women into lesbians.

      2. a better weapon   12 years ago

        I can't tell you how many conversations I've had with gay friends who consider themselves moderate or independent because they are "culturally left and fiscally right" (forget for right now that the right doesn't really care about fiscal responsibility). Yet they only vote Democrat for this one issue.

        The right is really determined to have a very politically active subset of voters as their enemy.

        1. Palin's Buttplug   12 years ago

          When did the GOP care about fiscal responsibility?

          1926? OK, I will give you that.

          1. a better weapon   12 years ago

            They don't, hence my clarifier in paranthesis above.

            I'm talking about messaging, not policy.

          2. Smilin' Joe Fission   12 years ago

            the right doesn't really care about fiscal responsibility

            He covered that plug. But keep on pretending we are all Republican fanboys and that you are anything but a leftist.

            1. Palin's Buttplug   12 years ago

              OK, give me a technical foul then.

              I want the LP to emerge as a successful third party and all these make-out sessions with the GOP drive off at least 1/3 of possible supporters.

              1. wareagle   12 years ago

                finally some honesty PB - you want the LP to rise for no reason other than your belief that it helps the Dems electorally.

                1. Jordan   12 years ago

                  Indeed. As soon as the LP bad mouths the latest 1,000 page liberty-crushing abomination that Congress and the President shit out, or the latest TEAM BLUE gun control scheme, he'll flip his shit.

                  1. Palin's Buttplug   12 years ago

                    Bullshit. I am 100% opposed to any gun legislation.

                    I am also not the least concerned that any will pass.

                    1. Jordan   12 years ago

                      Which is why you defended California's latest gun regs as being "good for first time gun owners" and spent so much time defending Obama's proposed regs as no big deal.

          3. Hillary's Clitdong   12 years ago

            BZZZZZT! ACTIVATE TALKING POINTS! BUSHPIGS! CHRIST-FAGS!

        2. SugarFree   12 years ago

          They risk alienating a reliable base for the hope of another, smaller voting bloc. Homosexual men are a more natural fit with libertarians, assuming we could get our smaller, yet still quite loud SoCon faction to shut the fuck up about stuff that doesn't matter to the larger project of promoting liberty.

          1. John   12 years ago

            Gays a group tend to own their own businesses and be more entrepreneurial. The gays I know tend to be the opposite of the black people I know. Black people tend to be very socially conservative but pretty economic liberal and really believe in the social safety net and government regulation. Gays in contrast are very socially liberal but in my experience have been very economically conservative. They are very much natural libertarians. A lot of it is that the left was able to infiltrate and co-opt the gay rights movement like they do every other movement.

          2. Longtorso, Johnny   12 years ago

            Manly Evangelical Leadership needs a scapegoat for family breakdown. Since women really run churches (they give most of the time and money), Manly Evangelical Leadership has to submit to them to keep revenue flowing and butts in the seats, which is the basis of their continued employment. So we see the stress on submission and obedience (overcompensating by forcing all males in the congregation into a hierarchy w/ them at the top), and the anti gay hysteria.

            If Manly Evangelical Leadership condemned divorce (like Jesus, who was silent about gays, did), their jobs would be at stake. Can't have that. EEEEK!! It's a gay man under the bed!!

            1. John   12 years ago

              Johnny,

              Divorce is the real problem. Divorce causes more harm and poverty than sodomy ever did. What amazes me about our society is that we are still totally prudish and judgmental about adultery but have nothing to say about divorce. We will condemn some man or woman for having one night stand on a business trip. But that same person can walk away from their marriage and leave their children in a broken home for the most selfish and shallow of reasons and be almost congratulated for being willing to be true to themselves.

              1. Clich? Bandit   12 years ago

                I would argue poor and pressured marriage decisions cause divorce so does that mean organized religion is to blame for the decline of the "family unit"?

                -- By Jack Handy

          3. Root Boy   12 years ago

            Effin' Faggots! I keed. I'm pretty socon, but yeah, I don't push my values on others (except my kids, the little shitbirds. But I think you can get Log Cabin types, but we're still talking 2% of the population (some disagree). I think Gays have outsized power due to Geffen and Hollywood gays giving buku bucks to Dems and being mean to gays turns off a lot more straight people.

          4. thom   12 years ago

            assuming we could get our smaller, yet still quite loud SoCon faction to shut the fuck up about stuff that doesn't matter to the larger project of promoting liberty.

            BUT GOVERNMENT SHOULDN'T EVEN BE IN THE MARRIAGE BUSINESS!!!!!

        3. wwhorton   12 years ago

          Our neighbor is running for alderman as an independent for that very reason. He's fiscally conservative, very much a small-government kind of guy, but he's gay, so there goes any Republican backing.

          That's one of the many reasons I stopped supporting Republicans and went full-blown Libertarian. They're Democrats with different preferences. They're just a different flavor of statist, really.

      3. Tonio   12 years ago

        Nailed it, Johnny. Of course, I've been saying that for years.

        1. robc   12 years ago

          Then why isnt 5% of so of the US population (1/2 of 10%), in the LP?

      4. Atanarjuat   12 years ago

        Perhaps teh gaiz should be encouraged to focus the energy they used to be successful at endeavors such as interior decorating, fashion, the arts, etc., to bringing down Jezebel and other modern feminist a-holes.

        1. gaijin   12 years ago

          bringing down Jezebel and other modern feminist a-holes.

          The male gaiz + the male gaze = patriarchy with flair

          1. Bobarian   12 years ago

            The 'Fabulous' Male Gaze?

            Can we get it trademarked?

            1. gaijin   12 years ago

              Like this:

              The Fabulous Male Gaze?

              I will work on the infomercial script and get back to you.

      5. Enough About Palin   12 years ago

        "They don't want to see every man turn gay."

        [citation needed]

        1. Art Vandelay   12 years ago

          Well, just the HAWT ones.

      6. robc   12 years ago

        Their alliance with the Left is almost solely based around the single issue of gay rights

        If this were true, the fiscally conservative half of gays would be Libertarians.

  7. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

    'Youthful prisoners' subject to sexual abuse in Michigan, proposed class-action lawsuit alleges

    The suit, filed in U.S. District Court in Detroit on behalf of seven "John Doe" minor inmates, alleges that Snyder, the Michigan Department of Corrections, Director Daniel Heyns, three deputy directors and wardens at 10 state prisons have failed to abide by federal law in not keeping minor inmates separate from adults.

    Six of the unidentified inmates allege having been the victim of sexual assaults, physical and verbal abuse by other prisoners and administrative retribution by corrections officials, while a seventh inmate accuses female corrections officers of coercing him into having sex.

    All of the inmates were minors when the alleged incidents began, and two are still under the age of 17 now, the suit states, although no other identifying information is given.

    1. John   12 years ago

      Sex abuse in youth prisons is a scandal that makes the Catholic church scandal seem like a minor affair. It is rampant and horrible. So horrible, I think one of the reasons why no on will report on it is because not even the worst muckraking report wants to see the truth.

      1. SugarFree   12 years ago

        You also have to factor in the nasty streak in many people that youth offenders deserve whatever happens to them because they broke the "law."

        1. John   12 years ago

          That too. They also tend to be poor. And this society like a lot of society dehumanizes the hell out of the poor. If such things were going on in high end boarding schools and happening to the right kind of kids, it would be a huge scandal.

          1. wwhorton   12 years ago

            +1 Brideshead Revisited

            1. John   12 years ago

              It was very consensual in Brideshead. A little sodomy during school was apparently expected among the English upper class.

              1. Restoras   12 years ago

                This is Sparta?

                1. Swiss Servator, Zurichmania!   12 years ago

                  Thebes.

      2. Outlaw   12 years ago

        Cruel and unusual punishment, IMO.

      3. creech   12 years ago

        Yet the kids at Penn State have to vacate 11 seasons of football victories because some administration assholes wanted to "protect" the school's reputation.

    2. Hillary's Clitdong   12 years ago

      while a seventh inmate accuses female corrections officers of coercing him into having sex.

      Considering the kind of women who become COs, this sounds just as horrible as the prospect of being locked up in Warty's Special Room.

      1. Scruffy Nerfherder   12 years ago

        I'm imagining Anne Ramsey.

        shudders

      2. Atanarjuat   12 years ago

        I spent a month in jail once, which isn't that long, but I can report that after a while of not seeing any women, ANY female starts to look pretty good. The bulky 50 year old CO who tossed me clean laundry once a week wouldn't have been turned down.

        As I was going through the process of being released, an incredibly beautiful, petite sheriff's officer was in the same hallway. I now know I have no supernatural powers because the way I was staring would have made her clothes burst into flame. For her part, she looked disgusted and walked away.

        ^Not trying to say the minors weren't abused.

    3. Smilin' Joe Fission   12 years ago

      This whole thing reminds me of the movie Sleepers. That is a great movie.

  8. Restoras   12 years ago

    It's Thursday, people. Let's work hard to observe Troll Free Thursday. Those that like can go back to Troll Feeding tomorrow.

    1. Clich? Bandit   12 years ago

      HEAR HEAR!!

    2. Swiss Servator, Zurichmania!   12 years ago

      Seconded.

    3. Fist of Etiquette   12 years ago

      I WILL NOT COMMENT IN AN ECHO CHAMBER. I, for one, welcome dissenting opinion and will engage with anyone in constructive dialogue to come to a consensus about how I'm right.

      1. Snark Plissken   12 years ago

        White Indian
        White Indian
        White Indian

        *poof*

        1. Clich? Bandit   12 years ago

          THATS NOT FUNNY!

    4. itsnotmeitsyou   12 years ago

      Can we still mock them ruthlessly?

      1. Restoras   12 years ago

        Yes, mock away. "Dave's not here" and "Who farted?" are appropriate responses for today, as is this whole thing...

        Don't lock eyes with 'em, don't do it. Puts 'em on edge. They might go into berzerker mode; come at you like a whirling dervish, all fists and elbows. You might be screaming "No, no, no" and all they hear is "Who wants cake?" Let me tell you something: They all do. They all want cake.

      2. SIV   12 years ago

        HE WILL NOT BE MOCKED!!!

    5. Floridian   12 years ago

      But they look so hungry. Like a dog begging for scraps from the table.

      1. Restoras   12 years ago

        I know, I know, but if you don't feed them they stop begging...and then you can really mess with them later.

    6. Smilin' Joe Fission   12 years ago

      Shreek is not a troll, he is the most purest libertarian of us all. We are the trolls on Shreeks libertarian comment board.

      /sarc

      1. Palin's Buttplug   12 years ago

        How can I be a troll when I vote LP every presidential election (04,08 excepted)?

        1. WTF   12 years ago

          Dave's not here.

          1. Enough About Palin   12 years ago

            Well if he isn't who just farted?

  9. Fist of Etiquette   12 years ago

    Newark Mayor Cory Booker has won a special election to represent New Jersey in the U.S. Senate.

    In Jersey voters' defense, he was the only celebrity on the ballot.

    1. Lady Bertrum   12 years ago

      "He's just so clean and articulate!"

    2. Outlaw   12 years ago

      He will be our next President or Vice President.

      Bank on it.

      1. Drake   12 years ago

        He is exactly what the left needs - an absolutely empty vessel into which they can pour all their hopes and assumptions. It will probably work out great.

        1. Root Boy   12 years ago

          I'll tell you what difference it makes!

          /Hilldog

    3. gaijin   12 years ago

      he was the only celebrity on the ballot.

      and an action hero at that!

  10. Justin S   12 years ago

    Hey, neanderthals, how's it feel to get your asses kicked? Sorry your plan to starve America's poor kids didn't work out, thanks to some real Americans getting together to make a deal that benefits everyone--including you.

    1. Jordan   12 years ago

      Dave's not here, man.

      1. Restoras   12 years ago

        I think he farted though...

        1. Swiss Servator, Zurichmania!   12 years ago

          Crop dusted and walked out, eh? He is NOT welcome here any more!

          1. Troy muy grande boner   12 years ago

            I was crop dusting the grocery store yesterday.

            1. Restoras   12 years ago

              I crop dust on my commuter train sometimes. Lulz...

    2. Atanarjuat   12 years ago

      Restoras is just testing us with an alternate handle. Stay strong.

    3. WTF   12 years ago

      Don't lock eyes with 'em, don't do it. Puts 'em on edge. They might go into berzerker mode; come at you like a whirling dervish, all fists and elbows. You might be screaming "No, no, no" and all they hear is "Who wants cake?" Let me tell you something: They all do. They all want cake.

      1. Lady Bertrum   12 years ago

        Free cake? Yummy!

    4. CE   12 years ago

      Are you calling Senator Lautenburg's starving widow a Neanderthal?

  11. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

    TRACTOR PULLZ!

    Bacon and beer milkshake to be sold at NASCAR race in Texas

    All your dreams have come true. At the AAA Texas 500 at the Texas Motor Speedway on Nov. 3, fans can enjoy the Shake 'N Bacon Brew, a bacon and beer milkshake.

    There's almost no way that's good, but there's also almost no way I wouldn't want to try it ? just to confirm my suspicion that it's impossible a bacon and beer milkshake could be as remarkable as it sounds.

    1. John   12 years ago

      In all seriousness, do they even have tractor pulls much anymore? Since ESPN decided to just broadcast sports center and variations of two idiots screaming at one another all day, they aren't on TV anymore.

      1. SugarFree   12 years ago

        They still have them, but they are sort of folded in with the monster truck type stuff. Around here they are more like concerts, in that they wouldn't want it to be on TV because it would hurt ticket sales.

        1. John   12 years ago

          That are oddly compelling in their own way. There is something kind of cool about having the money and the time to stick three Allison V12 engines on a tractor frame and seeing what it can do.

          1. Root Boy   12 years ago

            It's kick-ass. Even I, growing up in suburbia, only had to trek a few miles out to a county fair to watch tracker pulls as a wee lad.

            Gotta find some to bring my kids to.

        2. gaijin   12 years ago

          To add to the useless knowledge banks...I beleive the US National Tractor Pull Championships are held in the major metropolitan area known as Bowling Green Ohio.

      2. KMA Too   12 years ago

        It's on the "Ocho", John.

    2. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

      Bacon and beer? Is such a thing possible?

      1. wwhorton   12 years ago

        Hmm...I was just pondering that. Maybe if you cook up some bacon and toss it in the secondary. I'd be a little worried about contamination, though. I think you'd have to cook the bejeezus out of it and then like flash-freeze that shit down to room temp. Probably help if you trim the fat off, too, and everybody knows that's the best part.

        1. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

          Fermented bacon grease?

    3. Lady Bertrum   12 years ago

      They need to make a bacon and tequila milkshakes, then I'm in.

      1. Drake   12 years ago

        I'll be in the lab...

      2. Apatheist ?_??   12 years ago

        Doesn't have bacon but I've had the tequila milkshake here.

    4. SugarFree   12 years ago

      The bourbon milkshake is already a thing, as is bacon bourbon. Combining those three seems like they would have a better shot at deliciousness.

      1. Clich? Bandit   12 years ago

        the big trend at the GABF this year was a bunch of barrel aged bourbon beers...seriously wtF?

        1. Drake   12 years ago

          Seriously - try it.

        2. SugarFree   12 years ago

          They've been very popular here for the last few years. I really like a few of them, but many [cough] robc [cough] consider them an abomination.

          I don't really have many style purity issues. As long as it tastes good, I'm OK with how it's made. Country Boy brewery made a Rum-Barreled Double Brown that was amazing, maybe my favorite beer ever.

          1. Clich? Bandit   12 years ago

            I had 7 while there. All were ok. But why don't they use a scotch barrel and smoked malt? Bourbon (sorry Kentucky SteviaMan) lacks as an adjunct to beer.

            One of the judges was saying it was a trend starting two or three years ago but this year there were DOZENS of entries.

            Meanwhile, the Pro-Am table was fucking awesome. I think I may have to focus on getting into it. Maybe Kevin Delange or better yet, BIll Eye could be my pro. Unfortunately you don't pick your pro.

          2. robc   12 years ago

            Its not about style purity, I just dont like my bourbon and beer mixing.

            The flavor combo sucks.

        3. Bobarian   12 years ago

          The bourbon beers are delicious 9but overpriced) and the bacon bourbon is an affront to humanity.

        4. Brett L   12 years ago

          I'm sold after the Innis & Gunn cask aged beers. I haven't tried the bourbon casks.

          1. Clich? Bandit   12 years ago

            Brewery Name
            New Belgium Brewing Company:
            Coconut Curry Hefeweizen, Transatlantique Kriek

            Brewery Ommegang:
            Ommegang Scythe & Sickle

            7venth Sun Brewing Company:
            Graffiti Orange

            Arvada Beer Company:
            Watertower Wheat

            Finch's Beer Company:
            Fascist Pig Ale

            Carolina Brewery:
            Copperline Amber Ale

            21st-Amendment Brewery:
            Hell or High Watermelon Wheat, Back in Black

            Prost Brewing Company:
            Altfränkisches Dunkel Bier

            Chama River Brewing Co.:
            Bonus Czech

            Dillon DAM Brewery:
            Sweet George's Brown

            Ritual Brewing Co.:
            Wit's End

            High Noon Saloon & Brewery:
            Tonganoxie Honey Wheat

            Mother Earth Brewing:
            Bohemian Pilsner

            Coalition Brewing Company:
            Sourpuss, Bump's Bitter

            Christian Moerlein Brewing:
            Christian Moerlein OTR

            Goose Island Beer Company:
            Sofie

            Bayou Teche Brewing:
            Cocodrie, Boucanee, Miel Sauvage

            Big River Grille and Brewing:
            Rocket Red

            Lynnwood Brewing Concern:
            Bill and Ted's Excellent Amber

            Right Brain Brewery:
            Empire Spear Beer

            Taos Mesa Brewing:
            Old' 96 Sticke Alt

            Kootenai River Brewing Company:
            Grizzly Ale

            Joseph James Brewing Co., Inc.:
            Red Fox RIS, JJ 5th Anniversary Beer, JJ Smokin' Poles, Citra Rye Pale Ale

            Elysian Brewing Company:
            Dark O' The Moon

            Gore Range Brewery:
            Barrel Aged Saison, Bourbon Barrel Aged Porter ,Fly Fisher Red

            Woodfour Brewing Co.:
            Berliner Weisse, 100% Brettanomyces Pale Ale

            Asher Brewing Company:
            Green Lantern Organic Koslch

            1. Clich? Bandit   12 years ago

              a sampling of what I tried...there were many more but I was too obliterated to keep track

              1. Mustaf Herod Apyur Poup'r   12 years ago

                Sofie is truly a delight.

        5. robc   12 years ago

          I thought Berliner Weisse was the big trend this year. Bourbon barrel aged beers are so 2012.

        6. Marc F Cheney   12 years ago

          Barrel aged bourbon beers are too much. I'd rather just drink a beer with a bourbon on the side.

    5. db   12 years ago

      There's a restaurant near here that specializes in exotic milkshakes. I don't know about bacon and beer, but alcoholic peanut butter and jelly milkshakes are pretty awesome.

      1. Lady Bertrum   12 years ago

        I eat a low carb diet, so beer or jelly is a no-no. The milkshake must be made with whole cream - not whole milk.

        I need to take care of my figure - cannot be consuming carby nastiness like beer and jelly.

      2. Kaptious Kristen   12 years ago

        Let me guess...the owners wear skinny jeans, porkpie hats and scraggly neards.

        1. Lady Bertrum   12 years ago

          Don't forget the scarf and black frame glasses.

          1. Clich? Bandit   12 years ago

            How do those guys EVER get laid? Even I probably couldn't with those handicaps (and the fact I am married and would die a horrible death, but lets assume this is before marriage).

            1. SugarFree   12 years ago

              They do, but they cry a lot afterwards and a countdown clock starts on the six months it takes for the girl to "realize" she's a lesbian.

        2. db   12 years ago

          Not really. I said they specialize in milkshakes but their real specialty is fine hamburgers. With all kinds of exotic meats and toppings. There is no way anyone there will fit into skinny jeans for long. Nor any way hipsters could afford to frequent the place.

          1. mr simple   12 years ago

            Meh, we have an exotic hamburger place around here that is very hipster friendly. And I've seen some large sized "skinny" jeans around too.

  12. Fist of Etiquette   12 years ago

    ...The Global Slavery Index 2013 has determined that there are slaves in 162 countries, including the United States, Canada, and Western European nations.

    In America it's Adrian Peterson.

    1. Swiss Servator, Zurichmania!   12 years ago

      You are all drafted NFL players. We keep you alive to serve this team. So run well, and live?

      1. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

        Well, if they were slaves, then we wouldn't have to worry about concussions and stuff like that. And they could be trained to play from birth, first pushing a wheel around for some reason no one is clear on.

        1. Clich? Bandit   12 years ago

          Love that scene...I got the workout video and millstone that folds under my bed. I now have HUGE shoulders.

          1. gaijin   12 years ago

            I got the workout video and millstone that folds under my bed. I now have HUGE shoulders.

            you should see the version that works the inner thighs!

      2. CE   12 years ago

        All pro sports should do away with the draft and stop rewarding bad teams. Do away with salary caps as well and let the owners who want to win really go for it, and the teams to gravitate to cities that can afford them.

    2. WTF   12 years ago

      The Global Slavery Index 2013 has determined that there are slaves in 162 countries, including the United States...

      Wage slaves!!111!!!

    3. Smilin' Joe Fission   12 years ago

      Slaves to the man, man.

      1. gaijin   12 years ago

        It's a Slave New World!

    4. robc   12 years ago

      Fuck off, slavers!

  13. Bee Tagger   12 years ago

    It was unclear what prompted the outburst and the woman was led away by House staff. The vote was completed, and the House passed the bill.

    As best as I can tell, the stenographer didn't vote to pass the bill so at this point I prefer her to hold office over most others.

    1. wwhorton   12 years ago

      Unclear what prompted the outburst?? Nearly the entire government has been wailing and rending their garments over the excruciating austerity of the sequester (dah, dah, DAHHHHH!) and the "shutdown", and then they pass a bill with more pork than a hotdog factory. I mean, I wouldn't be surprised to see that someone's earmarked $75 mil. to study the impact of pony ownership on Congressional granddaughters.

      Shit, she only went Freemason; I'm surprised she didn't go full Lovecraft.

      1. mr simple   12 years ago

        Seriously, everyone know the masons are just lower level EOD.

  14. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

    Man's Best Friend - part MCXIX

    Dog eats owner's toes while he's asleep

    Mr Thomasson said: "A friend of mine who was staying over came into my bedroom in the morning with a cup of tea.

    "He yelled, 'The dog has eaten up your toes!'"

    The dog itself was also affected by the morphine, falling asleep before it could eat even more of Mr Thomasson's foot.

    1. Jordan   12 years ago

      His foot was rotting away, so I'd say the dog did him a favor. Man's Best Friend can keep his title.

      1. Steve G   12 years ago

        rotting away... from an accident 30 yrs ago! WTF

  15. Fist of Etiquette   12 years ago

    ...Sen. Mitch McConnell (R-Ky.) is taking flak from Tea Party members and his potential primary opponent.

    And the war between the GOP establishment and Tea Party begins in earnest.

    1. Restoras   12 years ago

      Kentucky Kickback?

    2. SugarFree   12 years ago

      Yup. There has already been a pretty steady barrage of Anti-Mitch ads which have a distinctly TPA feel to them. Tippy the Turtle still has a huge war-chest though, and if he gets the nomination, I don't think there's a Dem that could oppose him. If it looks even close, I'm going to switch registration to vote against him in the primary.

  16. Jordan   12 years ago

    During the House's vote, a stenographer had a rambling outburst about Freemasons.

    What a maroon. Everyone knows the Lizard People are the real threat. Just ask Shriek.

    1. Swiss Servator, Zurichmania!   12 years ago

      Chemtrails, man...chemtrails!

      1. Longtorso, Johnny   12 years ago

        The real threat is the American-Israeli [Empire].

        BTW, "HERCULE TRIATHLON SAVINIEN" comes up frightening quickly as a google search autocomplete.

        1. Clich? Bandit   12 years ago

          What do you expect. I was his presidential campaign manager. I know SEO bitch.

  17. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

    37 stone man forced to pay for two seats on jet finds they are rows apart
    http://www.telegraph.co.uk/new.....apart.html

    Les Price, 43, had to pay for the extra space when flying to Ireland and back as airline policy dictates anyone over 20 stone has to book the extra space.

    But when he got to the airport the staff didn't seem to have any idea about the rules and on the journey home his seats were two rows apart.

    He had already faced embarrassment on his flight out when he was allocated an aisle seat and a window seat, with another passenger in the middle.

    1. Auric Demonocles   12 years ago

      When he sits around a fellow passenger, he sits around a fellow passenger!

    2. waffles   12 years ago

      Is it unfortunate that this man faces embarrassment? I think not. His size may be inconvenient for him but it is also inconvenient for everyone who shares space with him. If he is ashamed of being unable to fit in a normal sized seat then it is because he should be.

      It is terrible that this man faces such shame for existing. Airplanes need to work harder to accommodate passengers of size, perhaps with a mandated extra aisle of larger seats. Of course these should come at no additional cost to the passenger of size. We need a law to protect these unfortunate victims.

      1. Apatheist ?_??   12 years ago

        I agree that they should have to pay for two seats because it fucking sucks having someone that big take up half your seat. But he did buy two seats, the airline should at least do that shit properly.

    3. Outlaw   12 years ago

      Thin privilege is being able to buy a single airplane seat and not forced to sit around a guy!

    4. Live Free or Diet   12 years ago

      and on the journey home his seats were two rows apart.

      Damn he takes up a lot of space!

      When I used to fly at upwards of 350 pounds, one seat didn't really do the trick. I carried a lot of it as muscle mass too, and I still was involuntarily pushing the seat recline button in a lot of aircraft.

  18. Fist of Etiquette   12 years ago

    By an overwhelming margin, the Senate passed a bill to fund the government and raise the debt ceiling. The bill was later passed by the House and signed by President Obama.

    The GOP had leverage and actually came away with less than they started with. Good job.

    1. Justin S   12 years ago

      This is all because the vast majority of the American people were against this little stunt. Polls show how people's opinions have turned against the Tea Partiers, even those who supported them in the first place. At this point the movement is dead, dead, dead. Obama played y'all like suckerS!

      1. John   12 years ago

        Sure it is totally dead. The underlying problems and grievances that caused it to arise have totally been solved and we can just go back to pretending everything is fine. I wouldn't count on it going away there sport.

        1. Fist of Etiquette   12 years ago

          This was a win by the president and the GOP establishment for certain. The House had leverage and they gave it up. The Tea Party has been weakened by lack of will and slavishness to MSM reporting on politics and polls.

          The numbers were meaningless. In a year voters won't care much about the shutdown, only what resulted from it. The Republicans as a whole fucked us over.

          1. John   12 years ago

            It is a win for the GOP establishment. That is for sure. The biggest problem is that small government supporters need to find a way to deal with the press. It is going to take a lot of dedication and some pretty extreme measures to fix things. But every time someone stands up and tries to make something happen, the press is there to blanket the country with a unified message that that person is a nut. You can't win the argument if you can't get your message out or it is being drowned out by a constant drone of the MSM. The MSM has to die before any real change can happen.

            1. Fist of Etiquette   12 years ago

              A relentless charm offensive is their only hope, but they have no one capable or willing to do that.

              1. John   12 years ago

                It wouldn't help. George W. Bush was from the right family and kissed the media's ass like no one else. He really charmed them. But they still hated him and did everything they could to destroy him.

                And Bush was not an insurgent. He was part of the establishment. If someone like him can't charm them, a real insurgent doesn't have a chance. The media exists to protect the government and the Prog ideology and destroys anyone who is a threat to that or in Bush's case is outside the hive and has the nerve to win an election.

                1. some guy   12 years ago

                  And how do you compete on charm when your message is "we need to stop promising free stuff to undeserving people"? The media doesn't want to hear it. The average American doesn't want to hear it. The only things we have to offer are freedom and responsibility. Most people are terrified of both.

                  1. Kaptious Kristen   12 years ago

                    I've come to the realization that people won't be convinced of the merits of limited government via the media or via any establishment institutions like Congress. For most, it will take complete economic collapse to realize the Dems and Repubs don't have the right answers.

                    1. Scruffy Nerfherder   12 years ago

                      Say it often, say it loud.

                      De Tocqueville was right.

                      Took a Frenchie to predict the outcome of the American experiment.

                2. Juice   12 years ago

                  But they still hated him and did everything they could to destroy him.

                  Second term, yes. First term, he wanted war drums and boy did they deliver.

                  1. John   12 years ago

                    And it is not like they fabricated documents to.claim he was a deserter to keep him from being respected r anything. Give me a fucking break. How long can you assholes lie to yourselves about the media lying us into a war? Fuck you I was there and remember tell your bullshit to someone who doesn't know any better.

      2. WTF   12 years ago

        Don't lock eyes with 'em, don't do it. Puts 'em on edge. They might go into berzerker mode; come at you like a whirling dervish, all fists and elbows. You might be screaming "No, no, no" and all they hear is "Who wants cake?" Let me tell you something: They all do. They all want cake.

    2. Jeff   12 years ago

      I'd say they made out like bandits. The congress creature's ideal job is to have no power (and thus no responsibility) save to slap his name on everything back in his home district or state a la the Exalted Cyclops Robert Byrd. Now the president basically has unilateral power to raise the debt ceiling, and the opposing party can feign outrage over his spendthrift ways while being free to engage in their own spendthriftiness. Win/win.

      1. Atanarjuat   12 years ago

        The Tea Party will probably increase its presence in the House because of the stunt, as mainstream GOP candidates lose primaries, so in that sense it was a long-game success.

        And as you said, it gave ownership of the debt and Obamacare to the Democrats as that was who was seen defending them in the media.

        1. gaijin   12 years ago

          Certainly, we'll be able to hear the MSM move on to coverage of the success of Obamacare's rollout. Especially as we approach the January 1 coverage date, right?

          1. some guy   12 years ago

            Oh certainly. That coverage won't be a reflection of reality, but it will happen anyway.

  19. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

    Japanese company unveils "Nyan Nyan Nouveau" red wine for cats

    Earlier today, pet food and supplement maker B&H Lifes launched its newest product, Nyan Nyan Nouveau ("meow Nouveau"), announcing the good news via press release.

    The company states that the wine comes in the wake of popular products such as Wan Wan Beer (woof woof beer) and after receiving numerous requests from customers asking for "a drink for my cat that we can celebrate Christmas and birthdays with!" which of course makes no sense whatsoever because, as any cat owner will tell you, as far as cats are concerned every day is their birthday.

    1. Jordan   12 years ago

      I'm disappointed they didn't put Nyan Cat on the label.

    2. Sy   12 years ago

      I don't think they're marketing this marinade properly.

  20. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

    Law of Urination: all mammals empty their bladders over the same duration

    The urinary system evolved to eject fluids from the body quickly and efficiently. Despite a long history of successful urology treatments in humans and animals, the physics of urination has received comparatively little attention. In this combined experimental and theoretical investigation, we elucidate the hydrodynamics of urination across five orders of magnitude in animal mass, from mice to elephants. Using high-speed fluid dynamics videos and flow-rate measurement at Zoo Atlanta, we discover the "Law of Urination", which states animals empty their bladders over nearly constant duration of average 21 seconds (standard deviation 13 seconds), despite a difference in bladder volume from 100 mL to 100 L. This feat is made possible by the increasing urethra length of large animals which amplifies gravitational force and flow rate. We also demonstrate the challenges faced by the urinary system for rodents and other small mammals for which urine flow is limited to single drops. Our findings reveal the urethra evolved as a flow-enhancing device, enabling the urinary system to be scaled up without compromising its function. This study may help in the diagnosis of urinary problems in animals and in inspiring the design of scalable hydrodynamic systems based on those in nature.

    1. Rich   12 years ago

      the physics of urination

      Nice band name.

      1. Ted S.   12 years ago

        the physics of urination

        The politics of dancing

    2. Auric Demonocles   12 years ago

      Our findings reveal the urethra evolved as a flow-enhancing device, enabling the urinary system to be scaled up without compromising its function.

      Except for Hank Hill.

    3. Smilin' Joe Fission   12 years ago

      Nice standard deviation on that time measurement.

      1. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

        yeah, not exactly the type of grenade I would want to throw.

        "Yeah, it blows up in 10 seconds, give or take 8 seconds".

      2. gaijin   12 years ago

        ah, but with this Flomax treatment, you too can eliminate your deviant elimination time.

      3. Live Free or Diet   12 years ago

        Yeah, that struck me as awfully high as well.

      4. Cascadian Ephor Xenocles   12 years ago

        I was going to say - that's more than half the mean!

      5. Juice   12 years ago

        But it's still a pretty tight range for a gross (literally) biological function across thousands of species.

  21. sarcasmic   12 years ago

    Students and parents want Playboy-posing Spanish teacher, 21, back in classroom

    Cristy Nicole Deweese posed naked for the magazine and was 'Coed of the Month' when she was 18
    Ms Deweese taught Spanish at Townview Magnet High School in Dallas
    Student and Parents are speaking out against her firing

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new.....-back.html

    'Are her male 16- and 17-year-old students looking at her without picturing her nude?' Another added.

    They were doing that before they knew she posed for Playboy.

    1. Restoras   12 years ago

      They were doing that before they knew she posed for Playboy

      Women become more naive about males when they become mothers. They all think that their sweet boys would never make jokes about each other's moms.

      1. Live Free or Diet   12 years ago

        Make jokes? Hell, Senior year I was banging a teacher and a friend's mom. (I would rather have been doing the girl instead of her mom, but I was stuck in the dreaded Friend Zone.)

        1. Scruffy Nerfherder   12 years ago

          We bow down to your greatness

        2. Steve G   12 years ago

          "This thread is worthless without pics" as the old forum saying goes...

        3. Spoonman.   12 years ago

          Maybe she wasn't interested because you were banging her mom?

    2. Auric Demonocles   12 years ago

      In high school, any female under 40 was being pictured nude, and some of the ones over.

      1. DontShootMe   12 years ago

        Whoa, that explains the people who ran screaming from my Algebra 2 classroom.

        Dang, now I have a mental picture I can't get rid of. Think Jabba the Hutt....

        1. sarcasmic   12 years ago

          Our Algebra 2 teacher was fresh out of college. Her first job as a teacher. Hubba hubba!

          1. Root Boy   12 years ago

            TMI, but constant boner for my Algebra 1 teacher. Embarrassing at times.

          2. Spoonman.   12 years ago

            My Pre-cal teacher was mean, but that didn't make her any less hot.

            1. CE   12 years ago

              More actually.

          3. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

            I had a hot French teacher... gawd, my 15yo self loved to watch her ass wiggle as she wrote on the chalkboard.

          4. Live Free or Diet   12 years ago

            Yep! Spanish teacher in middle school, fresh out of school herself. Sweet Georgia accent too. How she ended up in Virginia, I never knew.
            Tight pants were in style then, so the boner showed. I carried my books shifted forward in a vain attempt.

            1. Spoonman.   12 years ago

              "I carried a boner under my belt, as was the style at the time."

      2. Clich? Bandit   12 years ago

        I would never want to repeat those 3-4 years ever again. I get nostalgic about childhood but when the raging hormones started it sucked. I STILL have some left over pent up anger.

        1. Auric Demonocles   12 years ago

          At the time I was on varying amounts of prednisone, which is a drug with a long list of side effects including mood swings. To this day I'm not sure how much of my anger was due to the pills and how much was due to puberty but either way, it was not a good situation.

        2. sarcasmic   12 years ago

          In my opinion anyone who misses high school is a pathetic loser. I mean, spending your entire life looking back on your teenage years as the best years of your life? Fucking pathetic.

          1. Clich? Bandit   12 years ago

            NOW, late elementary and early middle school were pretty awesome.

          2. gaijin   12 years ago

            Nostalgia for events in one's past seems normal, given its prevalence. When it becomes the lens through which the majority of one's life is viewed, well then you've either reached old age or failed to reach adulthood 😉

          3. Red Rocks Rockin   12 years ago

            The losers who never get over their resentment at not being part of the cool crowd in high school are vastly more pathetic and far outnumber the Al Bundy "I scored 3 TDs for Polk High!" types.

            Some of them even get jobs in the media and spend the rest of their life trying to punish society for them not getting to fuck the head cheerleader or starting QB.

            1. Clich? Bandit   12 years ago

              I liked easy chicks in HS. 1. they are usually very nice people. 2. they require little work to get their clothes off. 3. they typically don't go batshit insane on you. and Finally 4. they are easy to date if you dont go to the same school.

              1. Auric Demonocles   12 years ago

                All 4 of those were incredibly false in my experience.

                1. Clich? Bandit   12 years ago

                  HUH...where were you raised?

            2. Briggie   12 years ago

              The best girls where the ones I met in drama club. That was a gold mine. Besides that I don't really miss high school. College on the other hand...

          4. Tejicano   12 years ago

            I was in the recruiter's office the day after I turned 17 - even had an appointment. The only reason I finished high school was because SGT Waid said I had to and arranged a delayed enlistment (common procedure) for me to have the 6 months I needed to get the diploma.

            Jeez, I wanted out of high school so bad - just wanted to get started being an adult and paying my own way as soon as it could happen. I had plenty of friends in high school but I knew it was not what I wanted to be doing.

    3. Hillary's Clitdong   12 years ago

      Why not use this to their advantage? "Miss Deweese will pose nude for any student who can achieve full fluency in Spanish!"

      1. Clich? Bandit   12 years ago

        HOLA! Yo tengo cocinar! Me yammo Bandit! Me gusta boobies!

        1. Hillary's Clitdong   12 years ago

          Me gustan boobies. No nudity for you!

          1. Clich? Bandit   12 years ago

            DAMN PLURALS

          2. Ted S.   12 years ago

            He also forgot all the ? characters. 😉

            I don't think there were any ? characters necessary.

        2. Atanarjuat   12 years ago

          Me gusta boobies!

          Best Spanglish phrase EVER.

      2. Scruffy Nerfherder   12 years ago

        Me gusta!

      3. CE   12 years ago

        Donde esta la biblioteca, Senorita DeWeese?

    4. Troy muy grande boner   12 years ago

      I wonder how many male student were tardy for her classes? Offered to clean her chalk board? Mow her lawn?

      1. gaijin   12 years ago

        Obligatory:

        Maybe I should go to hell, but I'm doin' well, teacher needs to see me after school.

        I think of all the education that I missed.
        But then my homework was never quite like this.
        Got it bad, got it bad, got it bad,
        I'm hot for teacher.

      2. Ted S.   12 years ago

        From Nipsey Russell:

        When you make love to a teacher,
        You're bound to have an amazing night.
        She'll make you do it again and again,
        Until you get it right.

      3. Live Free or Diet   12 years ago

        Offered to clean her chalk board? Mow her lawn?

        Trim her bush?

    5. KMA Too   12 years ago

      So, what can we expect from the kids once they discover a "B" cup?

  22. Rich   12 years ago

    A bombing in north-west Pakistan during the Muslim festival of Eid al-Adha killed a provincial lawmaker and seven others.

    Hey, shouldn't you mention that it's one of the holiest festivals?

    1. Cascadian Ephor Xenocles   12 years ago

      You keep Eid in your own way, and let them keep it in theirs!

  23. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

    Obviously a member of the KKK who has it coming:

    Florida man sets self on fire while setting up cross-burning Halloween decoration

    A Florida man was hospitalized with serious burns he suffered while decorating his home for Halloween Tuesday night, according to police.

    According to his wife and friends, the 50-year-old man was using gas to light a wooden cross as a joke when he set himself on fire at his Palm Bay home.

    Investigators said the man's wife used a water hose to douse the flames.

    1. Drake   12 years ago

      I'm guessing she wasn't particularly surprised.

      1. Bobarian   12 years ago

        She was there with the water hose.

        Do you think she hesitated a little bit before putting him out?

    2. Smilin' Joe Fission   12 years ago

      Well now all I can think of is this scene from Harold and Kumar.

    3. CE   12 years ago

      Florida Man is the world's worst super hero.

  24. sarcasmic   12 years ago

    Emma Watson STILL looks stylish as she dresses for comfort in jacket, jumper and jeans to for arrival at LAX

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/uss.....t-LAX.html

    1. Hillary's Clitdong   12 years ago

      Why is this news?

      1. Pelosi's Accommodator   12 years ago

        There were widespread fears that she was no longer looking stylish.

    2. John   12 years ago

      Emma is a cutie. She doesn't have much of a body. But she is pretty enough that the whole package still works.

      1. Thane of Steelport   12 years ago

        She doesn't have much of a body.

        wut

        1. John   12 years ago

          She is all skin and bone. No boobs, no hips. She is just a pencil. She not unattractive. She is not fat for sure. But she is not exactly Scarlett Johansson either.

        2. Live Free or Diet   12 years ago

          Sorry, but I agree. She still looks like 13 trying to be 23.

          1. CE   12 years ago

            I was surprised in the documentary This is the End that she wasn't Raptured up right away, but I guess staying through the Tribulation was her penance for portraying a Godless witch in the Harry Potter films.

  25. Ted S.   12 years ago

    Police prosecutor posts videos of himself using highly illegal drugs; angling for punishment rather less severe than a normal human being would get

    Brent Thomson posted videos of himself using methamphetamine, and blogs describing his use of drugs at sex parties in April and May, online.

    Police found a small amount of the drug "P" and syringes when they searched the 49-year-old's home. He is seeking a discharge without conviction in the Waitakere District Court.

    They didn't shoot any of his dogs.

    Further down in the article and good for a laugh:

    Anne Tolley says the overwhelming majority of police staff are doing a fantastic job and they should not face workplace drug testing. She says police are quick to prosecute their own if there is any wrongdoing.

    1. sarcasmic   12 years ago

      That's funny!

    2. John   12 years ago

      In fairness, the guy is so stupid, is prison really the right place for him?

    3. some guy   12 years ago

      What is the difference between an illegal drug and a highly illegal drug?

      1. Tejicano   12 years ago

        It makes you higher?

    4. Bobarian   12 years ago

      WTF is "P"?

      I guess I'm just not hip, or with-it or what ever it is that the young kids say.

    5. CE   12 years ago

      She says police are quick to prosecute their own if there is any wrongdoing.

      The paid suspensions are both automatic and immediate.

  26. The Late P Brooks   12 years ago

    Today, Bloomberg Business News features David Pfloufe(? whatever) as a "special guest commentator". What does it say about the state of America that a guy with no known demonstrable business expertise or economic understanding gets to go on my teevee and pontificate about the economy, and the danger of reducing government spending by even one waffer-thin dime?

    It seems to me an admission that political influence is more important in our modern economy than producing goods and services profitably.

    1. Kaptious Kristen   12 years ago

      Reminds me of this 30 Rock episode (one of the only ones where Tracy Morgan was actually funny)

  27. Rich   12 years ago

    Feds Studying How to Use Twitter For 'Depression Surveillance'

    Yet another reason to not use Twitter.

    1. Scruffy Nerfherder   12 years ago

      When can we start killing all the sociology majors?

      1. Outlaw   12 years ago

        There seem to be a lot of totalitarian assholes who get sociology or psych degrees.

        1. Smilin' Joe Fission   12 years ago

          Sociology is the easiest degree to get that I came across during my undergraduate days. I lived with a guy in sociology who had less than 15 hours of class a week and really did no assignment work other than when he had to write a few essays at the end of term.

          It is a joke of a degree.

  28. SFC B   12 years ago

    By an overwhelming margin, the Senate passed a bill to fund the government and raise the debt ceiling.

    I take comfort in the fact all of my congressional representatives voted against this abomination in their respective houses.

    1. Auric Demonocles   12 years ago

      I am not going to bother checking, as I'm sure the result would be too depressing.

  29. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

    Unrelated meanderings:

    My Milk Stout brew turned out to be damn tasty - the best thing I've made so far.

    I'm still (slowly) working on my next tube amplifier - an "universal" fixed-bias single-ended pentode design. All the parts have been ordered, except for the top panel which just requires some measurement & checking before I put in the final order.

    1. gaijin   12 years ago

      Milk Stout...the best home brew I ever made. And it gets better with age in a way that most of my ales never did.

    2. SweatingGin   12 years ago

      I made an Octoberfest a few weeks ago. Probably didn't lager it long enough, still had a bit of sweetness. Still very drinkable, not bad.

      Also have a pumpkin (pie) ale brewing. Probably bottle this weekend.

      1. Stormy Dragon   12 years ago

        NO FRUIT IN BEER

        1. Juice   12 years ago

          I can't agree more.

  30. Ted S.   12 years ago

    For those of you who get your rocks off on Game of Thrones-type stuff:

    Egill Skallagr?msson

    When he was only seven years old, Egill was playing a game with some local boys, I think it was some kind of ball game, when he felt like he had been cheated simply because he lost a game to a slightly older boy. Egill ran home full of rage just to return to the game with an axe and split his opponent's skull to the teeth.

    His parents were so proud of their son, he had killed his first man at just seven years old. That a boy!

    1. Eduard van Haalen   12 years ago

      He also killed a fellow poet whose ballad went:
      Iceland baby
      Da da da da da-da da da

      Aaaack

  31. Rich   12 years ago

    Parents Suing Summer Camp For Nearly $42M After Daughter Contracts Lyme Disease

    "Ariana was never told to wear tick protective clothing nor was she consistently instructed to use insect repellant when she and other campers left the immediate camp space for areas likely to have the infectious deer ticks"

    said the attorney of THE PARENTS.

    1. Ted S.   12 years ago

      Isn't Lyme disease treatable anyway?

      And it's not as much of a threat as the public health folks make it out to be. You have a fair amount of time to find the ticks before they bite you, and a fair amount of time to remove them. I live next to 1000 acres of deer-infested forest, so I'm used to the possibility of deer ticks.

      1. Clich? Bandit   12 years ago

        Rocky Mountain Spotted Fever on the other hand is a muthfukka.

      2. KDN   12 years ago

        I once pulled over 60 ticks off me after a single camping trip. Perhaps their special snowflake should have taken a damn shower.

        I'd really like to know how they came up with $42m. It's not like Lyme disease prevents you from working or is going to kill you, and that's assuming that the camp was negligent. This is dumber than suing someone over diabetes.

        1. Ted S.   12 years ago

          I make it a point to shower in the evening during summer since I go for walks in the woods after dinner and can use the shower to check for ticks. And that's when I don't notice the ticks while still in the woods.

          (To be fair, I tend to stay off the power line right of way during the height of summer, since that's where the ticks are the densest.)

      3. some guy   12 years ago

        Most people who have it don't have symptoms at all and many aren't even aware that they have it. But for a few people it can be a real bitch for months or even years after getting it.

        Still, the parents are being dumbasses here. Tick bites happen. Deal with it.

    2. mr simple   12 years ago

      A camp handbook promised to take precautions to protect campers from Lyme disease, Ponvert said...

      Ariana repeatedly visited the camp infirmary and camp nurses with obvious signs and symptoms of Lyme disease, according to Ponvert.

      This might not go well for the camp.

  32. John   12 years ago

    http://dailycaller.com/2013/10.....right-now/

    Obamacare is collapsing right now. 2014 is going to be a very interesting year.

    1. Restoras   12 years ago

      It's going to get even better over the next couple of months as more people flock to the sites to be in compliance by Jan. 1.

    2. BardMetal   12 years ago

      In the long run this might work out.

      The RINOs will piss off the Tea partiers who will then primary them with small government types, and then Obamacare can piss off everyone else so that those small government types can win some seats in the house, and senate.

    3. Rich   12 years ago

      They won't try 50 times to use a balky web site.

      Obviously the solution is to impose a new PENALTAX for not trying repeatedly.

    4. Justin S   12 years ago

      As if a new, complicated program has never had glitches before. In a few months all the starting pains will be forgotten and people will be signing up for health care. You yourself will forget, or pretend to forget, your predictions it would collapse. This is a real turning point for our country. You're lucky to be alive at this point in history.

      1. Scruffy Nerfherder   12 years ago

        D-

        No subtlety. Try harder.

        1. Justin S   12 years ago

          You can deny all you want. This is happening, and it's a good thing. Your children will thank you when they live in a country where everyone enjoys having access to health care.

          1. NoVAHockey   12 years ago

            I didn't realize the ACA addressed the provider shortage and scope of practice issues.

            1. Clich? Bandit   12 years ago

              Dude, it is Thursday.

              1. NoVAHockey   12 years ago

                damn. my mistake.

              2. KMA Too   12 years ago

                OK. But, does the S stand for shit-stain?

                Inquiring minds want to know!

          2. Ivan Pike   12 years ago

            Your children will thank you when they live in a country where everyone enjoys having access to health care.

            Everyone had access to healthcare before O'care.

            Healthcare /= Health Insurance

            1. gaijin   12 years ago

              ^ this. People seems to get so easily confused.

            2. Tejicano   12 years ago

              I live in Japan where we have socialized medicine. A number of long term residents I know call it "Nazi-care". Some day soon you will know why.

          3. Hillary's Clitdong   12 years ago

            Your children will thank you when they live in a country where everyone enjoys having access to health care.

            Well, a country in which you are mandated to buy expensive insurance with a hilariously high deductible. Same difference.

          4. John   12 years ago

            Mickey Klaus is a liberal who supported Obamacare back in 2010. If he is saying it is collapsing, you might want to listen.

          5. Troy muy grande boner   12 years ago

            What aboot those poor people who live in state that are refusing to expand medicare?

      2. Hillary's Clitdong   12 years ago

        Heheheheheh. I will be enjoying the cries of rage as premiums spike.

        1. Restoras   12 years ago

          Yep. I can see the facebook posts now. I will just laugh.

      3. Kaptious Kristen   12 years ago

        And you people criticize drug addicts and fatties for having no self-control.

        STOP FUCKING FEEDING THEM. Goddammit.

        1. Swiss Servator, Zurichmania!   12 years ago

          The fatties or the drug addicts? Oh...the trolls!

      4. trshmnstr   12 years ago

        Did you know that many mammals have a bone inside their penis? Some past cultures (like the Eskimoes and the Vikings) would collect those bones from whales and decorate them.

        1. Enough About Palin   12 years ago

          That's pretty fucking gay.

          NTTAWWT

      5. Juice   12 years ago

        You're lucky to be alive at this point in history.

        Wow. Hey, you're trolling very effectively so far. Don't overdo it, though.

    5. Jordan   12 years ago

      They won't try 50 times to use a balky web site.

      Well, Perfect Strangers was a little before their time.

      1. Red Rocks Rockin   12 years ago

        Watching the Obamacare site shit the bed deserves a Meposian Dance of Joy.

  33. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

    Conrad Black: The Obamacare Disaster

    It is scandalous that there remains such a sadistic determination to inflict this measure, unaltered, on the country that does not want it, even though it has been launched and has sunk, without a ripple, as soon as it cleared the slipways, as the entire system of joining up and doing as this insane measure purports to require is impossible. Immediately following the oath of allegiance, in every school and similar ceremony in the entire country, there should be an obligatory pause to consider how it happened that the United States, in its dysfunctionality, is on the verge of default on its debt, its legislators' hands tied by sequestration. The country is broke, paying its bills through a fraudulent sale of bonds to itself, running a $700 billion annual current-account deficit, and its leaders are in brinkmanship talks over the imposition of a law that no sane person now supports and that is impossible to obey.

    This is the governmental equivalent of congestive heart failure. It is the domestic-affairs equivalent of the Syrian policy: the moral imperatives, red lines, "moral obscenity," punitive action that wouldn't really be damaging (would, in fact, be "unbelievably small"), and the constitutional position of commander-in-chief devolving to Congress. This has all become surreal.

    1. Palin's Buttplug   12 years ago

      I won't go on the site. Of course I am one of the big majority that already has insurance.

      1. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

        thanks for the unrelated comment.

      2. wareagle   12 years ago

        I am one of the big majority that already has insurance

        and your testimony highlights why the over-reach of O-care was not needed.

      3. Juice   12 years ago

        I already have insurance too, but I won't get to keep it, so I have to try the site. I've been able to give them a bunch of personal information, but I haven't been able to see any plans being offered or who offers them.

  34. db   12 years ago

    Nirvana has been nominated to enter the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Other first-time nominees this year include Linda Ronstadt, Peter Gabriel, Hall & Oates, and Yes.

    The long distance runaround finally ends. Why is it that some bands' paths to the Hall of Fame resemble Clark Griswold's frustrating encounter with a Paris roundabout while other groups, close to the edge of eligibility, practically fall in?

    Well, maybe all it takes is time and a word with an influential member of the Hall of Fame board. The system seems to be broken but no one seems to want to speak out about it, hoping they don't kill the whale of Big Music by exposing too many of its dirty secrets.

    The Parallels with Rush's long wait for induction aside, I bet Yes is just glad for the long wait to be over.

    1. Jordan   12 years ago

      Do people actually care about the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame?

      1. Steve G   12 years ago

        Do people actually care about Hall of Fames?

        FTFY

    2. BardMetal   12 years ago

      What exactly do they look for with nominees? Talent, musical and cultural influence, record sales, what?

      1. Restoras   12 years ago

        It's a mystery. It seems like just "I like these guys!" by the nominating committee. It's a joke that Yes only just got nominated.

        1. BardMetal   12 years ago

          I agree and sadly they'll probably lose out to Nirvana who isn't even in the same league has Yes.

          1. Enough About Palin   12 years ago

            I'm an old man who grew up with Yes, but who would prefer to listen to Nirvana.

      2. BakedPenguin   12 years ago

        Jann Wenner hates progressive rock. Additionally, he hated Rush's politics. He essentially had veto powers over which bands got in, which explains the lack of prog bands.

    3. sloopyinca   12 years ago

      The roundabout was in London, goddammit.

      1. db   12 years ago

        Sloopy, always remember that a disability like yours is no disgrace. Not everyone picks up on top quality song name puns right away, but with practice and good reading comprehension skills, you too can learn to appreciate the revealing science of God.

  35. Rich   12 years ago

    The seriously saddest comment (not from H&R) that I've seen today:

    I've almost come to take it for granted that I'll die at the hands of my own government someday. Not because I'm a radical, in your face kind a law-breaker..

    But simply because I want to be left alone...

    1. BardMetal   12 years ago

      Wow, that quote needs be repeated, maybe on a bumper sticker, or the beginning of a book?

    2. NoVAHockey   12 years ago

      where did you find that?

      1. Rich   12 years ago

        Read it and weep.

        1. gaijin   12 years ago

          That's a good quote and quite a few people I know have stated something similarly. Interesting, the commenter in your link had this quote in his signature:

          The unexamined life is not worth living.-Socrates

          I'm guessing Socrates didn't think it would be the state administering the examination!

          1. Dr. Frankenstien   12 years ago

            Socrates realized it by the end.

            I was thinking of the immortal words of Socrates, who said, "... I drank what?"

    3. Outlaw   12 years ago

      Sounds like he assumes the government will instantly kill him.

      Well, buddy, there are things worse than death that they'd rather do to you.

      Like stash you away in either a psychiatric prison or a real one where you'll be raped and beaten for decades.

      1. Outlaw   12 years ago

        And I'm firmly convinced the the left conflating society with government all the time is entirely intentional.

        If you're against their progressive totalitarian government, you're also anti-social, an enemy, and should be locked up for the good of the people.

        You're crazy too, since no sane person would say terrible things about a society led by the correct top men.

        Fucking cultists.

  36. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

    Galston: The Tea Party and the GOP Crackup

    According to two benchmark surveys by the New York Times NYT +1.81% and the Public Religion Research Institute, tea-party supporters espouse an ensemble of conservative beliefs with special intensity. Fifty-eight percent think that minorities get too much attention from government, and 65% view immigrants as a burden on the country. Most of the respondents see President Obama as someone who doesn't understand them and doesn't share their values. In their eyes, he's an extreme liberal whose policies consistently favor the poor. In fact, 92% believe that he is moving the country toward socialism.

    Many frustrated liberals, and not a few pundits, think that people who share these beliefs must be downscale and poorly educated. The New York Times survey found the opposite. Only 26% of tea-party supporters regard themselves as working class, versus 34% of the general population; 50% identify as middle class (versus 40% nationally); and 15% consider themselves upper-middle class (versus 10% nationally). Twenty-three percent are college graduates, and an additional 14% have postgraduate training, versus 15% and 10%, respectively, for the overall population. Conversely, only 29% of tea-party supporters have just a high-school education or less, versus 47% for all adults.

    1. Palin's Buttplug   12 years ago

      So they exhibit an unhealthy preoccupation with race but they are not racist. And the TP formed in Feb 2009 just after the black Muslin got elected.

      Got it.

      1. Eduard van Haalen   12 years ago

        It may be Thursday, but let me ask: Maybe you can tell us of the great progress made by "minorities" under the tender ministrations of the Democrats? A large underclass supported by govt spending, excessive incarceration...how do you think the Tea Party could do worse?

        1. Palin's Buttplug   12 years ago

          I don't care about minorities as a separate group.

          1. Eduard van Haalen   12 years ago

            Just delete the phrase "as a separate group" and you've got an accurate sentence.

      2. WTF   12 years ago

        CHRISTFAGS!!111!!!BUSHPIGS!!11!!!!

      3. Tonio   12 years ago

        ...just after the black Muslin got elected.

        I fail to see what thinly-woven cotton cloth has to do with the discussion.

        John writing your material, PeeBee?

      4. Juice   12 years ago

        The first "Tea Party" was a money bomb thing for Ron Paul in September 2007. That's where the term originated.

    2. Lady Bertrum   12 years ago

      Many frustrated liberals, and not a few pundits, think that people who share these beliefs must be downscale and poorly educated. The New York Times survey found the opposite.

      It's only surprising to a liberal that the folks who actually pay taxes are the ones most enraged by waste and overspending by government.

  37. The Late P Brooks   12 years ago

    This is happening, and it's a good thing. Your children will thank you when they live in a country where everyone enjoys having access to health care.

    You've got something running down your chin.

    1. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

      Access to shitty healthcare, access to a shitty economy, access to a shitty government.

      1. Rich   12 years ago

        And don't forget access to *Lyme disease*.

        1. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

          Access to a club to the head, access to drones, access to your deepest secrets.

          1. Steve G   12 years ago

            Access to Cleveland Browns players..

      2. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

        it' shit all the way down.

  38. Steve G   12 years ago

    http://thehill.com/blogs/congr.....l-security

    "A powerful U.S. military is indispensable to our national security; but in many ways, our bloated military budget has become a direct threat to the very security it is designed to create and protect."

    Refreshing/surprising to hear from a General.

    1. John   12 years ago

      It is very true. We have too many contractors, too many civilians and the DOD bureaucracy has started to view the military as a laboratory for social change (women in combat) rather than a fighting force. The whole force is a mess. We have too many generals, our staff are way too large, too many headquarters and too much waste. Our military succeeds in spite of itself.

    2. Scruffy Nerfherder   12 years ago

      Note that he is retired. You're not going to find anyone aspiring for a promotion who advocates that in active duty.

      I live in Hampton Roads and the military reigns supreme here. The amount of waste is almost unfathomable. You won't find a single politician that doesn't kowtow to the military.

      1. Steve G   12 years ago

        I'm in DC and work in the Pentagon and I'd say it's the other way around quite often. We want to drop whole fleets of aircraft and do a new round BRAC, but are completely paralyzed by the Hill... Granted it's not like the DoD would give the money back or anything, but at least we'd have the breathing room to keep what we've got in better shape.

    3. Red Rocks Rockin   12 years ago

      The irony of military spending, at least on the CONUS side, is that shutting down many of the installations really wouldn't have much of a negative economic impact in the long run. We have over 20 years of BRACs now to see that opening up those areas to commercial investment can provide just as many jobs as the base did.

      All that said, I'd prefer to shrink the OCONUS side first and then determine what we actually need for CONUS defense, but there's no reason to think that shutting down, say, Fort Carson or Langley would be any worse in the long run for Colorado Springs or Hampton's fiscal health than continuing to keep them operational.

      It's the bases in places like Clovis or Altus where economic growth would stagnate if they were shut down, but given the needs of the military for training grounds, it's a lot more likely that surviving bases will be in more remote rural areas anyway.

  39. Ted S.   12 years ago

    Hunters were robbed -- of an elk!

    Thieves came to visit a team of hunters in Vansbro in Dalarna during the night between Tuesday and Wednesday, Swedish Radio Dalarna reports. And the booty? A whole elk.

    1. John   12 years ago

      There are lots of stories about people bagging a prize elk only to see a grizzly bear show up and take it. Grizzlies were for a long time endangered and thus couldn't be shot and wresting one for an elk carcass was not advisable.

      1. Restoras   12 years ago

        What caliber rifle do you need to take down a grizzly?

        1. John   12 years ago

          Something bigger than a .270 I think. Elk can go over a thousand pounds. I would imagine anything that can take down an elk would take down a grizzly.

          1. Restoras   12 years ago

            I have a .30-06 - I wonder if that would be sufficient.

            1. WTF   12 years ago

              A properly placed shot would take one down no problem.

          2. General Butt Naked   12 years ago

            A .270 could take down an elk. A hot loaded one packs a lot of energy.

            Here's a complete ballistics guide with energies out to 300m.

      2. WTF   12 years ago

        Grizzlies were for a long time endangered and thus couldn't be shot

        unless HE WAS COMING RIGHT AT US!!!

        1. John   12 years ago

          True. But the penalty for shooting an endangered species is so large that you really wouldn't want to bet on the game warden believing you.

          1. H. ReardEn   12 years ago

            Unlike the penalty for police shooting an unarmed man that is COMING RIGHT AT US!

  40. Eduard van Haalen   12 years ago

    Dissenting from the triumphalist narrative, Peter Beinart voices some progressive butthurt:

    "Why the Shutdown is a Republican Victory

    "...Let's pause for a moment to underscore the point. In early September, a "clean" CR?including sequester cuts?that funded the government into 2014 was considered a Republican victory by both the Republican House Majority Leader and Washington's most prominent Democratic think tank. Now, just over a month later, the media is describing the exact same deal as Republican "surrender."...

    "Now that Republicans are backing off [their Obamacare] demands, the press is saying they've caved. But that's like saying that the neighborhood bully has caved because after demanding your shoes and bike, he's once again willing to accept merely your lunch money....

    1. Eduard van Haalen   12 years ago

      "It's not just that Obama looks likely to accept the sequester cuts as the basis for future budget negotiations. It's that while he's been trying to reopen the government and prevent a debt default, his chances of passing any significant progressive legislation have receded. Despite overwhelming public support, gun control is dead. Comprehensive immigration reform, once considered the politically easy part of Obama's second term agenda, looks unlikely. And the other items Obama trumpeted in this year's state of the union address?climate change legislation, infrastructure investment, universal preschool, voting rights protections, a boost to the minimum wage?have been largely forgotten."

      http://www.thedailybeast.com/a.....um=twitter

    2. Scruffy Nerfherder   12 years ago

      Projection reigns supreme.

      If we can't have all your money anytime we want it for whatever, then you're bullying us.

  41. sloopyinca   12 years ago

    You know what I accomplished yesterday? I picked out Jack Black in Demolition Man and managed to spot Tim Matheson as a young, drugged-up horse thief with a Texas twang in Adam-12.

    Yes, I'm still running a high fever.

    1. Ted S.   12 years ago

      Watch Tim Matheson as the eldest kid in Yours, Mine, and Ours.

  42. The Late P Brooks   12 years ago

    Of course I am one of the big majority that already has insurance.

    We're all very happy for you. Too bad the lobotomy didn't turn out better, but at least it didn't cost nothing.

  43. mr simple   12 years ago

    So I just watched Sebelius' interview on the Daily Show that Nick linked to in his earlier post.Let me recap for you:

    1.Obamacare is a market based solution that will give people options in health care for the first time ever.
    2.Individual mandates don't need to be pushed back a year because people get subsidies; employer mandates got pushed back a year because it has no effect.
    3.Anyone who opposes this is crazytown, a term John repeatedly used.
    4.Single payer would be the best solution because medical care "does not lend itself to market solutions," but try getting that through to crazytown.

    I haven't watched that show in a while. It looks like they dropped all pretense of not being a DNC talking points outlet.

    1. Auric Demonocles   12 years ago

      So they are saying Obamacare is a market solution, and that medical care does not lend itself to market solutions?

      1. tarran   12 years ago

        Yes, they really are.

        You must understand that pundits, like the politicians they cheer for are really, really stupid.

      2. Eduard van Haalen   12 years ago

        It's almost like it's in their interest to have problems in Obamacare so they can say, "I *told* you baggers that we need single payer, will you finally listen?"

    2. Palin's Buttplug   12 years ago

      Holy shit, that is a stupid takeaway.

      I saw Jon Stewart HAMMER Sibelius for 12 minutes on the mandate disparity and the site's dismal kickoff.

      1. WTF   12 years ago

        Who farted?

        1. Bobarian   12 years ago

          And why does it smell like semen?

  44. The Late P Brooks   12 years ago

    And the other items Obama trumpeted in this year's state of the union address?climate change legislation, infrastructure investment, universal preschool, voting rights protections, a boost to the minimum wage?have been largely forgotten."

    Boo fucking hoo.

  45. The Late P Brooks   12 years ago

    I haven't watched that show in a while.

    I hated Jon Stewart before it was cool. And the rest of the show sucked donkey balls from Day Fucking One.

    1. Scruffy Nerfherder   12 years ago

      Did you drink PBR before everybody else too?

      1. Palin's Buttplug   12 years ago

        Brooks does watch Mika on Moaning Joe while he quaffs that PBR. He is that cool.

        Excuse me - "leer at", not watch.

      2. Sy   12 years ago

        Hipster Brooks burned his tongue because he sipped his coffee before it was cool.

    2. John   12 years ago

      Thank you. Stewart was never funny. It is not that I don't like humor that makes fun of my side. I love people like the late George Carlin who was a real no kidding hippie liberal. But you have to be funny. And being a smug douche bag is not funny.

      1. trshmnstr   12 years ago

        Amen, I could never stand Stewart. I could appreciate Colbert, but that appreciation was more of a "i won't walk out of the room if he's on" thing, and less of seeking it out. Since then, he's gotten worse, so i will walk out of the room.

      2. Marc F Cheney   12 years ago

        Fact: the two least funny comedians in "The Aristocrats" are Jon Stewart and Bill Maher. The writers from the Onion weren't funny either, but to be fair, they're not comedians.

    3. KDN   12 years ago

      the rest of the show sucked donkey balls from Day Fucking One.

      Fuck you, the Kilborn era was genius!

      1. Azathoth!!   12 years ago

        ^^^^^^^^^^
        THIS!!1!

        Five Questions!

  46. The Late P Brooks   12 years ago

    Did you drink PBR before everybody else too?

    Does high school count?

    1. Auric Demonocles   12 years ago

      If it was Pro Lib's high school, then absolutely.

      1. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

        Ye gods, no. Fuck that shit.

        1. Auric Demonocles   12 years ago

          That's true, they hadn't had time to perfect the recipe and win that blue ribbon yet.

  47. Eduard van Haalen   12 years ago

    Is H&R going to link to Nick Gillespie's Halloween article?

    http://ideas.time.com/2013/10/.....halloween/

    1. Eduard van Haalen   12 years ago

      Ah, there it is.

  48. Stormy Dragon   12 years ago

    The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame: because nothing captures the anti-establishment nature of rock like a government funded museum run by a bunch of big corporation music industry executives.

    1. John   12 years ago

      Since when was rock and roll ever anti-establishment? I say this as a lover of the music, but what a crock. Rock and Roll was always about getting laid and selling records and making money. Where it went off the rails the most was when people pretended it was about something else. BULLSHIT!!

      1. BigT   12 years ago

        About the time I first heard a Beatles song in an elevator - maybe 1982 - I knew rock had gone establishment.

        You must be a young'un, cause back in the 50's, 60's and 70's there was serious hate of rock n roll by all kinds of groups. Do you remember John Lennon saying the Beatles were more popular than Jesus? That set off quite a storm.

    2. Winston   12 years ago

      You mean the same government that rockers want to fund everything and the big corporations that sold their records?

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