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Economics

Forget the Happy Ending, Mr. Ed: Woman Would Face 20 Years in Jail for Unlicensed Horse Massages

Nick Gillespie | 9.15.2012 9:25 AM

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The libertarian public-interest law firm Institute for Justice reports on one of the most insane, inane, and profane prosecutions in all-time memory.

Karen Hough is a long-time practitioner of "equine massage," which supposedly is beneficial in all sorts of ways to the animals in question.

Last year, she inquired about working in Nebraska. Here's the lowdown on that from IJ:

A 2007 memo from Nebraska's Board of Veterinary Medicine and Surgery asserted that "no health professional other than licensed veterinarians and licensed veterinary technicians may perform services/therapies on animals." This means Karen would need to spend thousands of dollars and seven years of her life just to acquire a government permission slip to do what she's been doing for years.

A few weeks later, she received a letter from Nebraska's Department of Health and Human Services ordering her to "cease and desist" from the "unlicensed practice of veterinary medicine." In Nebraska, continuing to operate a business without a license after getting a cease and desist letter is a Class III felony. So Karen could face up to 20 years in prison and pay a $25,000 fine. By comparison, that's the same penalty for manslaughter in the Cornhusker State.

What's worse, under Nebraska state law, she can't even give out advice on how to massage horses: "They told me I couldn't give massages for money; I couldn't do it for free and I couldn't even tell friends how to do it. That last one really got to me. To me, that is restricting my free speech." Of course, by using occupational licensing, the board can restrict who gets to massage horses, rubbing out the competition.

IJ notes that a Cornhusker State senator has introduced a bill that would reduce the necessary training time to just 100 hours. Which, IJ rightly notes, is still a ridiculous infringement on economic liberty. We all understand how cartels and licensing and all that jazz works to protect special interests but, really, what the hell is wrong with people?

Read more here.

Hat Tip: The wonderful Twitter feed of Nick Sibilla

Bonus vid: Mr. Ed and Wilbur discuss life insurance and the stock market:

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NEXT: Baylen Linnekin on California's Proposed GMO Labeling Law

Nick Gillespie is an editor at large at Reason and host of The Reason Interview With Nick Gillespie.

EconomicsCivil LibertiesCultureNanny StateRegulationOccupational LicensingAnimal Rights
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Hide Comments (23)

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  1. heller   13 years ago

    Another libertarian endorsement of a known racist. What a surprise!

  2. RBS   13 years ago

    Does she massage them to completion?

    1. heller   13 years ago

      It's called a full manual release.

  3. Fatty Bolger   13 years ago

    one of the most insane, inane, and profane prosecutions in all-time memory

    This a clear violation of her economic rights. It's an infringement on her constitutional rights. It's outrageous, egregious, preposterous!

  4. Archduke Pantsfan   13 years ago

    Our children are not safe with the likes of her out on the streets!

  5. Gene   13 years ago

    It doesn't sound constitutional, one would think the ACLU might want to look at this case.

  6. Pro Libertate   13 years ago

    To put things in perspective, Mike Tyson served three years for rape.

  7. wef   13 years ago

    After the Mr Ed clip, there was this:

    Clint Eastwood meets Mr Ed -

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qGdxxMECZz4

  8. Res Publica Americana   13 years ago

    What retarded horseshit. How the fuck do legislators even justify this?

    1. RBS   13 years ago

      Public Health and Safety or some similar bullshit.

    2. Fist of Etiquette   13 years ago

      They don't have to justify it. They only look like they're giving justification when in fact they're actually just licking the peanut butter off their gums.

    3. Atanarjuat   13 years ago

      As usual, "Fuck you, that's why."

  9. AlmightyJB   13 years ago

    What's the licensing requirements to make dog food out of them?

    1. Zombie Jimbo   13 years ago

      I'm sure you need an inspected kitchen, slaughterhouse certification.

      Bureaucrats, can't live with them, can't even kill something and eat it with them.

      1. Banjos   13 years ago

        I think JB was referring to slaughtering the bureaucrats.

        1. AlmightyJB   13 years ago

          Best idea ever

          1. Ryan   13 years ago

            Sweeney Todd did it.

  10. Fist of Etiquette   13 years ago

    Which, IJ rightly notes, is still a ridiculous infringement on economic liberty.

    Well, if she won't meet the bureaucrats halfway and at least let them wet their beaks, then I say toss her in jail and throw away the key and then charge her for a replacement key.

  11. Flyover Hick   13 years ago

    ROTFLMAO... except for the using occupational licensing to restrict the 1st Amendment part... Note, no license is needed in Nebraska for non-vet 'animal grooming' which is not defined, so this is a straw man case to challange the ability to provide services requiring vet licensing, still, Reason is one of my favorites...

    1. heller   13 years ago

      Apparently Nebraska's own Department of Health and Human Services disagrees. Apparently they think massaging a horse isn't "animal grooming." Or is the cease and desist order also a "straw man?"

      HERP DERP ROTFLMAOCOPTER

      1. RBS   13 years ago

        Easy heller, some people can't read.

    2. Jordan   13 years ago

      Did you even read the post before responding? How retarded are you?

  12. IceTrey   13 years ago

    As long as she doesn't make any therapeutic claims about her massage, I think she would be in the clear.

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