Patriot Act

Rand Paul: "I object strongly to this"

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I done told you that this was the most interesting man in the Senate. Here's the latest CSPAN-porn from the PATRIOT-fighter, taken from yesterday:

Keep following this space for Mike Riggs' great coverage of Paul's one-man stand.

UPDATE: Check out CSPAN2 right now (3:43 EDT) for some live Paul on the Senate floor.

NEXT: USDA Sez You Can Stop Cooking Your Pork Chops to Death

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  1. Reid thinks he can just fuck you and renege on agreements and you’ll shut up and take it.

    Seriously, I picture Reid jumping out of a hotel bathroom naked and shouting at Paul, “No amendments, no amendments!” and he’s so used to getting his way he figures Rand will just suck his dick and like it.

    1. How bad was Sharron Angle that she couldn’t beat this cretinish putz?

      1. Bad. Very bad.

  2. This guy is looking more like a hero every time I hear about him.

    1. It is a sad state of affairs that there’s only one guy who will stand up to this violation of basic constitutional liberties. This is the kind of stuff they used to warn about in dystopian mainstream movies. But now you are a kook if you even complain.

  3. I done told you that this was the most interesting man in the Senate. Here’s the latest CSPAN-porn from the PATRIOT-fighter, taken from yesterday:

    So are we take it that Matt has forgiven Rand for his slavery comments?

    1. he shall wear a red hyperbole H

      1. Hyperbole is the language of the blog o’sphere.

        But you knew that.

  4. Good to see an adult in D.C.

  5. God I love this man.

  6. Rand Paul for President in 2016!

    1. Tell me again why we have to wait that long.

      1. Dude, the people aren’t going to elect a freshman Senator as president.

        1. They will after he chops Obama’s head from his neck like an acorn off a tree in the holmgang!

        2. Sarcasm, right? 2008

          1. Your detector is functional, yes.

  7. Fuck you in the neck, Harry!

  8. I’m simply impressed that Paul looks like he’s angry enough to tear Reid apart into shreds yet has enough composure to provide a highly skillful and coherent rebuttal. That’s amazing.

    1. That’s what I wish all politicians had.

  9. I pooped my pants a little in excitement.

  10. Paul may actually make a serious career for himself as the lone loud voice of opposition to statism. He’s certainly going for it at least; good for him.

  11. Fuck you, Harry Reid. Go DIAF.

  12. Rand will go down in history as the first man to say “Suck the shit out of my unwiped ass, fucksticks!” on the Senate floor. At least I hope so.

    1. Thanks for the visual.

      1. I’m really hoping you only envisioned Paul yelling out the quoted phrase, and not the actual activity the phrase describes.

        This is HnR after all…. even the oddest statements can use confirmation every now and then.

  13. It’s rare that a politician vastly exceeds my expectations of them, but damn, that speech was great!

  14. But . . . but Yglesias said he was a lunatic, so he must be. /progressive

  15. “I pooped my pants a little”

    “Suck the shit out of my unwiped ass”

    “Fuck you in the neck”

    “Go DIAF”

    And they say libertarians are not eloquent.

    1. ‘Tis a fine poetry that soothes and excites all at once…

    2. Exactly, anonopussy. Fuck you in the fucking neck and go die in a fire, you little nothing.

      1. At least anonypussy cannot resist its passive aggressive bitching. It must have nagged anyone near it to death already, so it comes here to nag us.

    3. Damn straight. You’d think, being librarians, these sluts would be better with words.

    4. some are inarticulate and then some are cowards. The former can mature, the latter is a man’s nature

      1. And you’re merely retarded, rectal. I do find it hilarious that someone as imbecilic as you would comment on maturity without the slightest sense of irony.

        But, then again, you are a mongoloid, so what should we expect?

        1. …you are a mongoloid, so what should we expect?

          That she has a hat? And a job?

          1. But does it bring home the bacon?

            1. Yes, but it just masturbates with the pan instead of cooking the bacon.

          2. A regular job or just an odd one?

            1. Well, one that can pay for a hat, anyway.

              1. Can it pay for a replica Odd Job hat with faux razor brim?

                1. Faux? I don’t think that’s a good idea. Throw your hat to decapitate an enemy. . .well, you’d better decapitate that enemy.

                  1. I don’t want to imagine rather with both mongoloid strength and a razor sharp hat missile.

                2. I’m more of a hatbox girl

  16. Shit, piss, fuck, cunt, cocksusker, motherfucker.
    And tits.

    1. Rand’s on the floor now. cpan 2

      1. Thanks for the heads up.

    2. “FDR Utters Stream of Cuss Words in Fireside Chat”

    3. I feel that one should italicize the “and” because it conveys the rhythm of the original deliver better.

    4. Tits shouldn’t even be in there.

      1. It’s such a friendly sounding word…

        Sounds like a nickname…

        Sounds like a snack…

        1. Dreadfully tinny sort of word.

  17. I almost feel guilty watching and enjoying that fine display of *actual** statesmanship, seeing as how its cause was the renewal of a bill that has made a mockery of the 4th.

  18. I bet you thought Youtube had the dumbest commenters on the idiot, didn’t you? Behold CNN.

    GOP = Greed Over People
    “we don’t want our records to be sifted through by a government without judicial review.”

    But the moron is ok with warrantless access to every other private aspect of our lives?

    How can this GOP goober be so contradictory in one sentence?

    May 25, 2011 08:18 pm at 8:18 pm |

    1. That is some grade A stupid. Plus calling Paul a moron while completely not understanding what Paul stands for is pretty beautiful.

      1. This one’s pretty great as well. It could use some [square brackets] though.

        ED FL
        heyRandy dandy Reid is an ex boxer and could beat the Guts out of you with one hand. A better way would be to take you over his knee ,pull down your pants and spank you like the Dumb little old Brat that you are. America knows that you are from Kentucky like Mcconnell. That makes 2 of the dumbest Senators from the least educated constituents in America, you come up with DUMB suggestions and you get treated with Dumb solutions. It is hard to believe that daddys baby Senator has to live with his Daddyin the big City. Grow up before kentucky recalls you.

        May 25, 2011 08:41 pm at 8:41 pm |

        1. That comment board is like going to an Irish bar.

          1. Have you ever been to Irish Pub, in Atlantic City?

    2. the dumbest commenters on the idiot

      I’m not sorry for typing idiot when I meant to type internet. It works just fine as is.

      1. The Idioternet.

        1. The idiot killed the TV star.

          http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Iwuy4hHO3YQ

    3. Just be glad you don’t spend any amount of time reading comments on CBC (Canadian Broadcasting Corporation).

  19. dude’s losing his voice – quick, get that man a shot of southern comfort…

    1. Rand’s gettin’ all historical and shit! Go man! Liberty!

    2. Southern Comfort?
      Blasphemy!
      Kentucky’s the land of bourbon.

  20. Rand Paul was able to tell the truth more in his short senatorial career than all the other senators in their combined careers.

  21. Again, Senator Paul said, and I quote (@0:39), “I’m in favor of terrorists having weapons.”

  22. Wow those CNN commentators. Good times.

  23. This is like porn for libertarians.

    1. Porn is like porn for libertarians. This is like touching a real live woman.

      (or man if that’s how you roll)

      1. This is like porn for porn star libertarians.

  24. The senate just tabled Paul’s Gun amendment 85-10. What a bunch of craven cowards.

    1. Tabling is just pathetic. Are they really to cowardly to vote on it?

      And did 5 invertebrates abstain? Or were they just sick today?

  25. I haven’t watched the video; only seen the preview photo. But I presume that’s one of those Ross Perot-style easels with cardboard talking points on it?

    God I hate tuning into CSPAN and seeing those. Especially because most of the talking points seem to be printed versions of what the Congresscriiter says in his speech.

  26. I think the problem is he didn’t strenuously object.

    I object.
    Overruled.
    No, I strenuously object!
    Oh, then I’ll reconsider.

    1. That how it works, Sparky? Strenuously object?
      “I object, your honor.”
      “Overruled.”
      “No, no, no. I strenuously object.”
      “Oh, strenuously object? Well then I should take some time to reconsider.”

      1. i iz retarded.

  27. He seems to be saying: Senators, that void between your legs is where your balls are supposed to be. Step one: locate said balls. Step two: use them to locate a copy of the Constitution. Step three: “Suck the shit out of my unwiped ass.” Or maybe I wasn’t listening that closely.

  28. I have to say, I’m a little hard right now. Go Rand Paul.

  29. I can’t believe the PATRIOT Act passed again! Oh wait, yeah, I can. Obama’s in charge.

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