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When 'My Jaw Is Tired' Doesn't Cut It

Jacob Sullum | 9.19.2006 6:28 PM

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A new excuse for men who don't want to go the extra two feet.

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NEXT: Democracy or a $6 Snickers?

Jacob Sullum is a senior editor at Reason. He is the author, most recently, of Beyond Control: Drug Prohibition, Gun Regulation, and the Search for Sensible Alternatives (Prometheus Books).

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  1. Rimfax   19 years ago

    I'm sure that they'll find that it's all due to snus usage.

  2. Lynyrd Skynyrd   19 years ago

    Oooooh that smell!
    Can't you smell that smell?
    Oooooh that smell!
    The smell of tonsillary cancer around you?

  3. Zach   19 years ago

    I heard computer moniters cuase eye cancer.

  4. Don Coyote   19 years ago

    The stars, moon and juices have aligned at Reason. Penis and oral sex stories? I'll come back when everyone is laid and the mess cleaned up. Spare me the details. DC

  5. kevrob   19 years ago

    Great future pick-up line:

    Yeah, I had a doctor's appointment today. I had to get my HPV vaccine shot.

    Second try at posting this. (Singing) Feed the squirrels, tuppence a bag....... 🙂

    Kevin

  6. Gene Berkman   19 years ago

    Zach,

    Computer monitors probably don't cause cancer, but apparently they can aggravate Glaucoma.

  7. Ruthless   19 years ago

    kevrob,
    How about this for a pick-up line?:
    I had not only my tonsils but adenoids, whatever the hell they are, removed over half a century ago, so my slithering, sinuous tongue could be at your disposal, if you play your cards right, although I have recently noticed a little fistula on the tip of it. (My tongue, not your "down there," since I have not yet had the pleasure of eyeballing that particular doodad at close range.)

    smaacky!

  8. gaijin   19 years ago

    how come the swedes always do the interesting research?

  9. Jeff Fecke   19 years ago

    Well, looks like that tonsillectomy I had when I was three will come in handy after all.

  10. mk4myday   19 years ago

    OFF-TOPIC..

    Not that I wouldn't love to see pot legalized BUT...

    I'd sure like to see a reason H&R about how ole Willy N. walks away on misdemeanor charges with 1 1/2 lbs. of pot + some shrooms...yet the poor ole regular joes end up with felony charges and possibly years in prison..any takers on this one?

  11. Zach   19 years ago

    Becuase loserana decriminalized pot possesion. I guess 1 and a half pounds was within the limit...

  12. crimethink   19 years ago

    I think you all know my position on oral sex, but the article doesn't mention any actual controlled studies done by the "researchers", just wanton speculation.

  13. JD Jackson   19 years ago

    I haven't done that in years, anyway. I used to be enthusiastic but soon lost my taste for it. At least my GF doesn't care for it either. And I don't feel obligated.

  14. JD Jackson   19 years ago

    I haven't done that in years, anyway. I used to be enthusiastic but soon lost my taste for it. At least my GF doesn't care for it either. And I don't feel obligated.

  15. Jim Murphy   19 years ago

    "My jaw is tired"? With all due respect to Mr. Sullum--whom I've described to non-believers as "arguably the smartest man in America"--I find this somewhat disconcerting. Obviously his technique must differ from my own since in my travels "south of the border" (I should get extra points for throwing in a Bob Wills reference) it's usually my tounge that tires. Maybe its due to my impressive maxillofacial conditioning, but my jaw has never tired to the best of my recollection..

    The good news is that after describing my dilimma to the personal trainer at my gym he recommended a workout regimen to strengthen my tounge. The little weights are uncomfortable in my mouth, and I don't like the metallic taste of them, but my tounge is much stronger and no longer tires..nor does my jaw ; )

    And if you haven't read Mr. Sullum's "For Your Own Good" you owe it to yourself to do so. And, no, I'm not his "sock puppet"...

    Now that I've neatly tied in a reference to most of the "Hit and Run" posts of the last 24 hours I'm going to bed..

  16. Jim Murphy   19 years ago

    Uh...because Willie Nelson is a legitimate American hero? If the cops are going to give preferential treatment to anyone, better it be the "Red Headed Stranger" than some faceless political hack (or even a Kennedy)...

    >>>
    Not that I wouldn't love to see pot legalized BUT...

    I'd sure like to see a reason H&R about how ole Willy N. walks away on misdemeanor charges with 1 1/2 lbs. of pot + some shrooms...yet the poor ole regular joes end up with felony charges and possibly years in prison..any takers on this one?
    >>>

  17. Number 6   19 years ago

    mk4myday- Because he's Willie fuckin' Nelson. I think that says it all.

  18. BG   19 years ago

    I'll take my chances.

  19. BG   19 years ago

    I just read the article and it seems that there is little or no risk to me since I had my tonsils taken out. Also since it is a virus that is the issue, one can reduce one's risk through use of a dental dam.

  20. Waltzing Willy   19 years ago

    While I am generally opposed to the Nanny-State, this is one case where I feel posting a warning label would be prudent.

  21. SteveInClearwater   19 years ago

    JIMMURPHY...First time pot possession in LA is only a misdemeanor. Had just one of the bus occupants claimed possession of the 1.5 lbs, they would have likely faced intent to distribute charges. However, state police report that each of the five occupants claimed a share of the contraband found.

    MORAL...If you're going to ride through LA with 1.5 lbs of pot, bring at least five friends along for the ride.

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