The Volokh Conspiracy T-Shirts and Mugs You've Always Wanted (or at least the best of what we've come up with).

No fancy designs or super-clever slogans. Just basic VC merch.

We're not known for our design savvy or fashion sense at the VC, but we've nonetheless thought it worth offering some basic Volokh Conspiracy merchandise.

Basic t-shirts, mugs and glassware with the VC logo are available here. Should inspiration strike, we may well offer more. With that in mind, feel free to provide recommendations and ideas for potential items in the comments. VC merchandise remains something of an experiment, and we welcome feedback.

Comments

[Drewski]

I definitely would prefer VC stuff that wasn't predominantly branded for Reason Magazine.
But I'm surprised you guys haven't leaned into it. Your T-shirt should be a conspiracy board with strings of yarn run between contributor photos, bits of the tagline (e.g., one that says "Mostly law professors"), some select post titles, maybe a caption from one of Professor Volokh's amicus briefs, and a big question mark in roughly the center.

[Á àß äẞç ãþÇđ âÞ¢Đæ ǎB€Ðëf ảhf]

Yeah, seems strange to tie it in with Reason. Did the WaPo days have merch, and was it tied in to the WaPo?

[Commenter_XY]

Agree: Drop the Reason branding.

Why? I think 'Reason' takes away from Volokh Conspiracy.

[ReaderY]

Agree with dropping the Reason branding.

Also, who gets the profits? Some sort of non-profit organization, or do the Conspirators simply divvy it up?

[The Margrave of Azilia]

Magic lamp – rub it, and a lawyer appears to give you three pieces of legal advice.

The lamp would of course be fairly expensive.

[Á àß äẞç ãþÇđ âÞ¢Đæ ǎB€Ðëf ảhf]

Make it AI-hallucinated advice. More in in keeping with the tradition of unreliable sneaky genies.

[The Margrave of Azilia]

You may be thinking of the monkey’s paw.

The Arabian Nights assures as that genies are quite safe and effective unless you misplace the lamp, or fail to exact a promise of servitude from the genie before releasing it.

Of course, try to get a genie who isn’t hard of hearing…

[Á àß äẞç ãþÇđ âÞ¢Đæ ǎB€Ðëf ảhf]

No, I'm thinking of genies who go out of their way to misinterpret wishes, as documented in countless jokes. Leprechauns do it too, but it's almost always someone on a beach finding a lamp which sprouts a genie.

[The Margrave of Azilia]

So there seems to be a bit of conflict among the sources.

Naturally, there was that genie I mentioned who was hard of hearing.

[Mr. Bumble]

Barbara Eden is the genie for me.

[John F. Carr]

The Pink Panther gets three wishes:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mj6toTRtw2Y

[theobromophile]

Kid size t-shirts: "My parents read The Volokh Conspiracy."

[Commenter_XY]

Baby size: Future VC contributor! 🙂

[Commenter_XY]

More feedback…why not have T-shirts for individual law professors who post here? Make it a fun competition sort of thing. Who has got the most fans willing to plunk down 26 bucks (yo really? 26 bucks?) for a T-shirt.

Eugene Volokh, Josh Blackman, David Post, Ilya The Lesser, Ilya the Somewhat More, Jonathan Adler, Orin Kerr (sign me up for that t-shirt right now!) – they could all have T-shirts.

Maybe we could get Rev Arthur his own shirt. 🙂

[Rev. Arthur L. Kirkland]

Which Ilya (the libertarian or the white grievance-consumed right-winger) is the Lesser, in your judgment?

[Rev. Arthur L. Kirkland]

.

Maybe we could get Rev Arthur his own shirt.

No shirt for me, but Artie Ray Lee Wayne Jim-Bob Kirkland has a shirt — or, at least, an offer involving a shirt. (He can’t tell you about it because he was censored with prejudice by the Volokh Conspiracy for poking fun at conservatives a bit too deftly for the proprietor’s taste.)

Artie proposes to pay $100 and provide a shirt — with “Free Artie Ray Lee Wayne Jim-Bob Kirkland” at the front, “Why Does Professor Volokh Censor Artie Ray?” at the back — to a UCLA law student who wears the shirt to class at UCLA for at least three days. This offer stands until UCLA no longer inflicts Prof. Volokh on students as a professor. As many as three students are welcome to earn that cash; get a free, collectible t-shirt (the student’s size); and strike a blow for freedom of expression and against the scourge of censorship.

Perhaps three members of the Young Democrats or American Constitution Society at UCLA could participate jointly as a fundraiser benefitting the winning side of the American culture war, the right side of history, and the stronger side at the modern marketplace of ideas.

[VinniUSMC]

Maybe we could get Rev Arthur his own shirt.

Advertise an Artie shirt, but it's always "Sold Out".

If there was Artie merch, it would be a giant dildo with text reading "shove it down their throat!" and "take it, clingers!".

[Stepped Reckoner]

I've been a charter reader since 2002, when I was (in the topsy-turvy way the legal profession has) a Circuit clerk. I bought all the Ninth Circuit merch I could afford. (Cut to sepia-toned memory of young person staring crestfallen at brass coaster, ballpoint pen, and thin sweatshirt). But the Volokh Conspiracy had none of that, and never has. It has seemed magnificently, or indolently, uninterested. And now, with decades gone by, I get my wish at last?

... Wow, these are ... amazingly ... underwhelming.

I have no interest in buying "Reason"-themed merchandise. Nothing personal, you understand. And the only item seeming to lack that theme, the T-shirt ... ,.. I don't know. It's looks cheap, and has too much text, but the problem is that that it looks too much like a T-shirt that would be handed out internally to Conspirators only. I look so white-haired and lined by now, and most of the Conspirators are so rarely in the public eye, that someone might actually mistake me for a Conspirator.

I respect the Conspiracy's resistance to filthy lucre, but I think I'll wait and see. I like the other comment suggesting personalized jerseys for each Conspirator, though, NFL-style.

[Mr. Bumble]

All made in the USA?

[Randy Sax]

I think the first thing to do it use pictures of the actual merchandise on the website, rather than generic cup with logo photoshopped on. Maybe have the profs wear the shirts in the ad.

[MaddogEngineer]

Merchandising, merchandising, where the real money from the blog is made!

Where's the VC Flame Thrower?

[Mr. Bumble]

Honestly, they all look pretty cheesy.

[Kevin Carson]

"I Shilled For All Three Trump Supreme Court Nominees, and All I Got Was These Lousy Feet Pics From ECB"

[Alpheus W Drinkwater]

“I cobbled together badly reasoned constitutional justifications for Republican desired outcomes, and all I got was this lousy t-shirt.”

[darkknight9]

I like stickers if they do stickers. 🙂

So its design is simple. Big whoop. I imagine the fashion design wing of the Conspiracy is in its infant stages. 🙂

Baby steps!