Watch Matt Welch Slag Trump, Hillary, Carson, and Romney on Red Eye

Tune into Fox News at 3 a.m. ET.

Donald Trump is an Establishment–scrambling sloganeer, Hillary Clinton is an imperious, negligent liar and alleged crook; Ben Carson is an incivil quitter, and Mitt Romney (contrary to what you might hear from him tomorrow) laid some of the groundwork for the presumptive 2016 GOP nominee four years ago. These and other political insults I intend to dispense on tonight's Red Eye w/ Tom Shillhue (Fox News 3 a.m.), where I co-panelize with the libertarian comic Dave Smith, progressive political commentator Christopher Hahn, and mirth-producing New Jersey ladyperson Joanne Nosuchinsky.