Donald Trump

The Loathsome Yet Riveting Art of Being Donald Trump

Donald Trump is a poet. A bad poet.

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Trump. Trump. Trumpitty Trumpitty Trump.
NBC

You can never be sure how much of a celebrity persona is an act. Is Donald Trump the unfiltered blowhard that he seems to be? Or is he a blowhard who carefully filters out the thoughts that the character "Donald Trump" wouldn't say? Trump has never struck me as a man in control of his image—he wants to look like a shrewd negotiator but instead constantly comes across as a dumb buffoon. But maybe he's more self-aware than he seems. The buffoon role is clearly working for him.

Self-aware or not, he's striking enough of a chord to have pulled ahead in the Republican presidential polls. And while that lead might not last any longer than the Herman Cain surge of late 2011, it's clearly coming from somewhere. Trump has taken two traditions, degraded them into forms that fit his public persona, and combined the results into a powerful political stink-bomb.

The first tradition is that familiar force, the people's tribune: those fiery figures, from Andrew Jackson to Tom Watson to Huey Long, who act, or claim to act, as the champions of the masses. As I wrote a few years ago, it may be

Trump. Truuuuuuuuump. TRUMP TRUMP TRUMP.
C-Span

tempting to dismiss the tribunes as mere demagogues. But like entrepreneurs invading a complacent industry, the people's tribune succeeds by stressing topics his more respectable rivals prefer to ignore. When ordinary voters feel neglected by ordinary politics, the tribune will channel their resentments. And if that sometimes means that ugly sentiments that once were confined to whispers will spill out into public debate, it also means that legitimate anger about a host of arrogant policies, from urban renewal to police harassment to corporate bailouts, can be forced into the open as well.

Trump's rhetoric falls squarely in the "ugly sentiments that once were confined to whispers" category, though the anti-Mexican currents he's tapped into aren't really confined to whispers these days. Most of the other Republican presidential candidates are border hawks, just like he is. But they're polite about it, while Trump goes straight for the scapegoating and delivers it in bluntly bigoted language. The border-control crowd is always worried that the politicians promising crackdowns don't have their hearts in it—after all, they've been making those promises for ages, and illegal immigrants are still here. (Like a die-hard drug warrior, the borderista thinks a thriving black market is a sign that the government isn't policing hard enough.) They have no such doubts about Trump. More than any other candidate on the Republican side this year, he is constantly praised for "saying what he means."

What, me Trump?
NBC

Funny thing about that: It's far from clear that Trump literally means all the crazy things he says. Take his announcement that he won't just build a border wall but will make Mexico pay for it. I can't dismiss the possibility that Trump actually thinks he can do this. But it's easier to take it as an over-the-top bit of braggadocio that's meant more as poetry than policy. It's bad poetry, of course, but the world has always contained more bad verse than good.

When he spouts stuff like that, Trump borrows from the second tradition: those electoral tricksters whose campaigns serve as a sort of satiric performance art. Think of Norman Mailer's 1969 bid to be mayor of New York, in which he suggested that gangs fight formalized jousting matches in Central Park; or Hunter Thompson's 1970 run to be sheriff of Aspen, when he promised to put dishonest drug dealers in stocks; or Jello Biafra's 1979 campaign to be mayor of San Francisco, when he said the city should rehire laid-off public employees as panhandlers with a 50 percent commission; or Howard Stern's 1994 dive into New York's gubernatorial race, when he called for filling the state's potholes with criminals' corpses. When I wrote an article about those campaigns a couple decades ago, I noted that none of those candidates entered their races expecting to win (though Thompson very nearly got elected anyway). That fact

Huckabee? No. TRUMP.
Parker Brothers

freed them, not only to push radical ideas that make more sense as poetry than as policy proposals—calling for a "Sweet Sunday" [when everything in the city stops for a day] makes a fine satiric point, but surely Mailer did not really want to shut the city hospitals down for 24 hours a month—but to be brutally honest in a way no "serious" politician ever can. To quote Mailer and Breslin's campaign slogan, these are campaigns with No bullshit.

So Mailer and Breslin were on the level about overthrowing the city bureaucracy and restoring power to the neighborhoods. Thompson was dead set on stopping the gentrification of Aspen. Biafra was out to show up the local corporate-state interests and to make fun of the police. Stern's was a populist thrust at the two most common complaints about life in New York: crime on the streets, and the streets themselves.

Trump probably isn't as self-aware as Mailer and the rest, and he certainly isn't as clever or funny. But he's filling a similar role. He's the guy willing to say something ridiculous to make his point. And if he's still in the race when the actual primaries are underway, he'll get votes from those Republicans so committed to Trump's point that they're willing to do something equally ridiculous in a voting booth.

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245 responses to “The Loathsome Yet Riveting Art of Being Donald Trump

  1. Seriously, guys, Trump does not deserve this much attention. Really.

    1. Maybe they polled some Millenials.

          1. Overruled.

            *polite applause*

            1. *turns narrowed gaze on Manhattan Beach Man*

              1. *stops bully at the beach who was going to throw sand in Swiss’ eyes – gives Swiss comic book with story about 98 lb weaking who was transformed with help from Joe Weider*

                1. I USE THE UNCLE WARTY’S SQUAT AND DEADLIFT FOR GREAT JUSTICE PROGRAM, DAMMIT!

                  1. Joe Weider was an amazing story. No one should have been able to turn his hobby of taking (totally non-sexual, bro) photos of gleaming, oiled male bodies into as much money as he did.

          2. Pollwise, he’s gotten a bump; thus the dump, and nevermind that it just shows that America’s in a slump. A Trump bump slump dump.

            1. TRUMP JUMP CLUMP DUMP. Trump is grump.
              Very, very grump.
              He had a bad hump. What a clump Trump jumped!

              1. Far as I’m concerned, he’s a gump.

    2. Can’t we go back to talking about forcing Christians to digitally remove the Confederate Flags from Gay Wedding cakes shaped like the General Lee?

      1. DONALD TRUMP DENOUNCES CONFEDERATE FLAG GAY WEDDING CAKE AT RALLY!

        1. STEVE SMITH SUPPORT DONALD TRUMP! RAPE IMMIGRANTS!

      2. I can’t even keep up anymore

        *throws hands in air*

    3. Can we lump all these into a Links type dump. Jeez.

    4. Hay-Zeus Christay! Thank you! WTH is with the All Trump All The Time Today?

    5. 57 channels and there’s nothing on

      1. That’s one for each state!

        1. Zing!

    6. Jesse Walker — Please quote me the exact phrase where “Trump” used “bluntly bigoted language.”

      Oh, I see, you can’t, can you. Get the hell off the internet liar!

  2. I hereby declare this to be Trump Day on h&r.

    You know what’s really funny? This wouldn’t be happening if it wasn’t for the blacks.

    True story.

    1. Why you always gotta go bringin’ race into it, Jimmy??

      *looks at Gojira with sad, sad eyes*

      1. Because Mr. Lizard is the only one looking out for the interests of green reptiles. I feel disempowered and left out of the political environment, so I do what people who feel that way traditionally do in this country: blame the blacks.

        If it makes you feel any better, if I was European, I’d blame the Jews.

        1. You’re not European??!

          *draws back….leans forward tentatively*

          What ARE you then…..Jim?

          1. I destroy nip cities with atomic fire.

            So I’m American, of course.

            1. *relaxes*

              Well – OK THEN!

            2. Weren’t you born thanks to American radiation? Really, the ingratitude of kids these days.

            3. …and you’re still free to blame the Jews, as an American.

              1. Free to, yes, but that’s more of a European or Near East thing.

                1. YOUR NOT THE BOSS OF GOJIRA, DONA….I MEAN PROL….

                  *glares*

                  1. really?

                    “YOU’RE”

                    sigh

                    1. I’ll go to Ethiopia and hang me some black Jews. That’ll learn ’em!

                    2. Sammy Davis does NOT approve

  3. minus x% to REASON (increases donation to Institute for Justice by the same amount)

    Fuck you assholes. Really.

    FUCK

    YOU

      1. Howdy.

        1. THIS GUY

          I LOVE ‘IM!

        1. *narrows alphabet*

        2. well played, sir…

      2. He hasn’t figured that out yet.

  4. I’m starting to think you guys don’t really like Trump.

    1. He dared blaspheme open borders orthodoxy so he must be slain.

      1. It is what all libertarians believe – except for half of them.

        1. Where reason is concerned there can be no dissent from the holy triumvirate of weed, Mexicans, and soodmy.

          1. Reason needs to find room for rum and the lash, dammitall!

      2. He went well past orthodoxy, not that he deserves all this attention. There really shouldn’t be anybody defending what he said.

        1. well past orthodoxy

          Yeah – not a measure I use at all, and I wouldn’t vote for the Donald for love nor money.

          Well, maybe NOW I will, just to be a spiteful prick. Cause I’m like that.

        2. “There really shouldn’t be anybody defending what he said.”

          Well, a lot of the anti-open borders libertarians have their own orthodoxy and will defend anyone, no matter how horrible, if he criticizes open border policy.

        3. No, but only because no one should be paying attention to what a washed up reality TV star with fake hair thinks in the first place.

      3. I don’t think calling Mexicans rapists is just ‘blaspheming open borders orthodoxy.’

        And I don’t buy the Trump apologia that “Well, he didn’t call all Mexicans rapists!” Sure, but throwing in ‘I’m sure some Mexicans are good people” at the end of a claim that they’re rapists and criminals sure does make it sound like Trump was saying the ‘good people’ were outliers and that the great mass of Hispanics are gang banging rapists.

        1. It’s exactly what he said, and saying “presumably” really is even worse than “I’m sure some.”

          I was on vacation when this hullabaloo happened and I tend to avoid the internet on vacation but saw brief mention. When I saw the video of it in the airport on the way back it was even worse than I expected.

        2. Trump is a barely-literate idiot who is not exactly gifted at eloquent articulation of his points. I sincerely doubt he believes that all or even most of the young males that cross the southern border are rapists. But the equally intellectually bankrupt trend of referring to anyone who voices concern about the costs and consequences of unlimited open borders as a racist is pretty much the same “from the part to the whole” logical fallacy as what he said. And yet that seems to be the M.O. used by many of the open borders types here who’ve decided to adopt proggie idiocies rather than have a frank discussion about the significant costs borne in education, medical care, direct transfer payments, and all manner of other social costs that huddled masses of low skilled immigrants yearning to breath state assistance impose upon us.

          But maybe I’m just a mouthbreathing racist/

      4. Those fucking open-borders advocates and their ‘facts’ and ‘logic’. Don’t they know MERICA is about what feels right and not about faggotty book-lernin’?

        1. These fucking Canadians with their pretensions to think their beliefs matter.

  5. Oh, -5% additional for the Alt Text (which NORMALLY would be AWESOME! but in the present environment….)

  6. This is for you, REASON ^^

  7. REASON MAGAZINE ENDORSES DONALD TRUMP AND RACISM

    /because I still don’t think they’re denunciating hard enough

    1. Reason: *slaps Trump*

      Trump: *slaps Reason*

      *They pause, panting for a moment, the passionately kiss*

      1. *then…THEN!

        *..then passionately kiss*

        1. *barf*

          /for barfman

        2. REASON MAGAZINE REVEALS ITS RACIST UNDERBELLY IN ITS SUDDEN DESPERATE RUSH TO DISTANCE ITSELF FROM TRUMP, FORMER LIBERTARIAN ALLY

          1. Stop reading Salon at us, GILMORE!!!!

  8. Come on, Reason, poll some millennials already. Post an article about the liberating qualities of porn.

    Anything but Trump.

    1. I want to know how smoking dope is good for me and the economy.

      1. *buys Hostess stock*

  9. Next up, we have Robby Soave with a subtle piece titled, “Trump = 7 Reasons He’s. Not. Okay.

    1. I have been laboring at the oar a lot today – so I come back after some hours and find… TRUMPENTAG!

      Guess I haven’t missed anything…

      P.S. Even Drudge is goin’ TRUMPIN’ today…

      GAH!

    2. Number Five Will Shock You

  10. Lord, let this be the last trump…article.

  11. no more trump. don’t care. at all.

  12. Did we really need to be convinced, good and hard, of the lunacy of Donald Trump? I think most of us managed to figured that one out without 4 posts about him in one day.

    I know it’s a slow news day, but cmon. Still beats the picture of the millenial with the lumberjack beard, though.

  13. So I guess articles about The Donald….TRUMPED everything else today!

    AHAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAA!

    1. Not as good as my “last trump” joke.

      1. *jealous*

  14. You guys just doing a data TRUMP today!

    HAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHFUCKYOUHAHAHAHA!

  15. Guess “shave and a haircut” now sounds like

    TRUMPETY TRUMP *splash*

    HAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

    1. ..or a rimshot…whatever

      Shave and a haircut would be,

      “Shaaaaaaave and a haircut…

      TRUMP

      TRUMP!!!”

      HAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

  16. Hey, I’ll be right back, but I gotta go take a TRUMP!

    HAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!

    1. All those HAHAHAHAHAHAs….sage, is that you?!

  17. And if he’s still in the race when the actual primaries are underway

    He hasn’t even officially filed his paperwork yet.

  18. “They’re killing us!”
    Reporters flock, file, photo
    Blond hair in a breeze

    1. He is inspiring haiku’s!

      Will someone please stop him?

    2. God, you really are the worst.

      1. That may be my best haiku ever, man.

        1. It’s spectacular. It really is.

  19. /throws down two Jacks.

    Now that’s Trump!!!

    1. SOMEONE’S playin’ Euchre!

      /Midwesterner

      1. Yes. The calling card of Michigan. Although instead of throwing Trump, it was mostly being drunk and repeatedly asking what was trump…

        1. “Who’s deal is it?”

          /#2 most-asked question

          1. FUCK – “whose”

            Gotta focus…focus…focus…

  20. Not that the libertarian vote is substantial enough to tip a national election, but if it were, it would be a minor shame that the Reason editorial staff didn’t go to this level of pants shitting when Obama was a candidate in 2008 and 2012, when over half of them were endorsing his enlightened foreign policy and civil liberty views, even though his candidacy was every bit the clown show this is.

    1. when over half of them

      [citation needed]

      This number seems to increase every time it is posted.

      1. 2008

        2012

        I’m too lazy to tally them all up again now, but I’m pretty sure the last time I did 2008 was over 50% and 2012 was astonishingly high given the events from 2009 to 2012.

        1. Did you exclude all the people who weren’t the “Reason editorial staff?” Hell many of them aren’t even contributing writers.

          You’ll note that both Welch and Gillespie said Barr or not voting at all. Beat up on Bailey if you want I guess as he’s really the only one left here, but he voted for Bush in ’04, Obama in ’08, and Johnson in ’12 so his record could really be described as peculiar.

          1. He keeps changing his voting strategy, but keeps getting the same policy outcomes. The votes, they do nothing!

      2. https://reason.com/archives/200…..-your-vote

        Peter Bagge = Obama
        Ronald Bailey = Obama
        Radley Balko = Barr
        Tim Cavanaugh = Obama
        Steve Chapman = Obama
        Shikha Dalmia = No one because ARRRGGGHH!!! I HATE BOBBY JINDAL!!
        Brian Doherty = Voting is an illusion
        Nick Gillespie = Barr
        Katherine Mangu-Ward = Does My Hair Look Okay?
        Michael C. Moynihan = Hitler
        Damon W. Root = Barr, if I remember
        Julian Sanchez = Obama
        Jacob Sullum = Barr
        Jesse Walker = Barr
        David Weigel = Obama, at least a dozen times
        Matt Welch = Obama
        Cathy Young = Barr

        7/16, sub 50%
        POLITIFACT DECLARES = LIES!!!!

        1. Welch said Barr.

          And Dalmia’s non-voting stance looks pretty principled to me.

          1. You are correct, I am ashamed

            “Matt Welch

            1. Who are you voting for in November? I live in the District of Columbia, which will probably go 90 percent to Barack Obama, so I will probably throw a bone to the third-party candidate whose program most resembles my own: Bob Barr.’

            I was scanning the answers and tracked the first name i saw.

            Still, the point was simply to explode the ‘more than half’

            My statistical work is therefore confirmed.

            1. The main leaders didn’t vote Obama and apart from Bailey (staff but not editorial) and Chapman (who is a contributor and not part of the staff at all) the regular writers who did have been since drummed out. Also Bailey switched to Johnson in ’12 and Chapman isn’t in the article.

              Reason has pretty much purged the Obama voters and yet here we are 7 years later still discussing it.

              1. Now *you’re* exaggerating.

                kids, please, just shut up and eat your cake.

              2. True enough that I didn’t sift out the editorial staff. And 2012 was actually a lot more Gay Jay slanted than I remembered. Nevertheless, this is an unwarranted level of pants shitting over a candidate whose chances of being nominated are only marginally higher than mine.

                1. You seriously read these stories today as “pants shitting”?

                  1. I called it in the very first post

                    there’s no news here. they might as well have re-posted some Rick Santorum coverage for how relevant the guy is.

        2. 7/16, sub 50%
          POLITIFACT DECLARES = LIES!!!!

          Well that is if you discount the dozen votes of young Mr Weigel.

          19/16

        3. That is seven out of 17 writers who were willing to vote for the most pro government and farthest left President since Wilson.

          I am not seeing how “less than 50%” is much of a defense. Why was it anything other than zero? Or maybe one guy?

    2. Obama is the most manicured candidate the US has seen since Reagan. His candidacy on paper was nothing to speak of, but the man understands how to seduce voters, which is 90% of a political salesman’s job.

      Trump is a carnival act on par with Sharpton or H. Clinton were she to escape from her handlers’ leash for five minutes.

      1. I mean if popularity is the measure of a good politician, Trump is putting asses in the seats (for now). Substantively there was nothing about Obama’s campaign that rose above this level. “Hope and Change” may work better as a bumper sticker than “Fear and Delusion”, but at the end of the day it’s all the same bullshit. I respect Cavanaugh for coming right out and confessing he was voting solely on the basis of race. It may not be classy, but at least its honest.

        1. Trump is doing what the pizza guy did in the last election. That didn’t go very far. Obama’s seduction of the electorate was FAR more profound.

          1. Obama’s seduction of the electorate was FAR more profound.

            In large part because of retards who were too afraid to point out that the emperor had no clothes. His actual campaign platform was no more substantive. Bear in mind I began by saying:

            …even though his candidacy was every bit the clown show this is.

            The absurdity of Obama’s positions was every bit as evident as Trump’s. My point being: it’s too bad the libertarian vanguard was grand marshaling the parade instead of producing assembly line hysterical denunciations like they are now. The only difference between Trump and any of the other major party candidates is that we’ve all collectively decided that Trump isn’t serious (which he isn’t; I’m not arguing that he is. I’m just saying that treating the rest as anything better is stupid, and devoting this much attention to Trump is bordering on obsession which comes off as kooky considering his actual odds of securing the nomination, let alone being elected).

            1. This isn’t ‘hysteria’ as butthurt as it gets you. Trump may not be nominee but he is spreading odious horseshit and lies that are going to make America worse off.

          2. Trump is doing what the pizza guy did in the last election.

            The pizza guy was sunk by an NSA meta-data leak.

            I doubt anything like that would sink Trump.

            1. What? Citation?

          3. The GOP is playing Freak of the Week.

            They always do this before they wind up with some lackey who’s spent his life from 35 on toiling away for the Greater Good in state and federal government.

  21. “You can never be sure how much of a celebrity persona is an act. Is Donald Trump the unfiltered blowhard that he seems to be? Or is he a blowhard who carefully filters out the thoughts that the character “Donald Trump” wouldn’t say?”

    Bill James (the baseball guy, not the philosophy guy) once had a piece where he talked about a freshman dorm mate who was clearly a mathematical genius. The guy ate nothing but sugar, was autistic before autism became a thing, and was so socially remote and into his genius world of genius things that he barely acknowledged anyone else around him.

    It took a few months, but eventually James figured out that the guy wasn’t a genius at all, just a fucking freak with zero social skills who really liked junk food. Trump is just a fucking freak and, standing shoulder to shoulder with Bloomberg, the personification of the Rothbardian dictum that all billionaires are crazy.

    1. Sometimes it takes a crazy billionaire. The Palindrome helped bring down the Iron Curtain, pointed out (Very demonstratively!) the flaws in fiat currencies, & funded the Open Society Inst., whose Lindesmith Center has been very good at promoting liberaliz’n of laws on drugs & sex.

      1. Soros is a genius protege of Popper who was European communism’s greatest enemy for a generation or two before he went full Salon on the world as an old man.

        He’s still crazy and getting crazier by the day, it’s just that he had to fall a lot further than idiots like Trump and Bloomberg.

  22. The sub-average
    Yell “What about Obama?!?”
    Not this shit again

    1. Yes this shit again
      Tis the silly season now
      Why do you hate [blank]?

  23. The vacuum cleaner
    Of our border sucks Trump in
    With trash and rapists

  24. If anyone has a cool OT they’re reserving for the PM Links, I respectfully request they bust it out now.

    here’s some OT filed under BATFE suppressor regs lunacy: the econocan is only $85 but once the oil filter baffling is wrecked, you have to send the entire kit back to the manufacturer where they restamp you a new one… you know, because that makes much more sense than just accepting that people can buy a new FRAM oil filter for $10-15 that can be used with the original adapter.

    If or when you need to change the filter out, the ATF/NFA rules says it needs to come back to the original manufacture, which Cadiz Gun Works is. The cost is $25.00. The complete Econo-Can Suppressor can be shipped directly to us, for gunsmithing, which would be replacement/rehab/repair of the oil filter, with the serial # remarked, and documented as being replaced/rehabbed/repaired. The completed Econo Can Suppressor can be sent back to you at your address on your NFA Tax Stamp Form. You do not need to go though a dealer for gunsmithing services. The life of the oil filter varies depending on caliber used and bullet type. (ex. AR15=300-500 rds)

    1. This important rule
      Protects you from anarchy
      Pay up and fuck you

      1. Wow. Nicely done.

        1. Help I am trapped in
          A haiku generator
          Kill me kill me kill…

      2. If there is one thing
        I have learned from this place, it’s
        haikus fucking suck

  25. Four out of the last five articles have been on Trump.

    We get it: its important that Reason send out unmistakable social signals that they are on the Right Side of this issue.

    Perhaps, in the future, you could just do a single post that everyone signs on to:

    Trump Bad. Trump No Goodthink. Trump BadThink Make Us Sad. Trump to the Woodchipper.

    Honestly, a more interesting article would be whether Trump is getting any traction outside the Trollosphere, and if so, why.

    1. Huh – I guess I missed this. Thanks for the tip, RC!

    2. “Social signaling”
      I said the phrase, so I’m not
      Social signaling

    3. They’re lobbying for that lucrative anti-Trump funding that serious libertarians are going to earmark to Reason to battle the rising tide of the Trump Candidacy.

      Or Welch stepped out of the office early to appear on another lame episode of Shillue’s Red (RIP) Eye and everyone’s just phoning it in. Mondays suck.

    4. RC, weren’t you defending Trump this weekend? Methinks you don’t like H&R’s articles on him this day for some reason other than just their number…

    5. These threads do attract the whiny Hit&Runpublicans; like few others.

  26. Gov. Scott Walker = Launches “Not a Dork” Campaign

    1. Has he covered up his bald spot yet?

      My mother, who is, like everyone’s mother, an accurate approximation of what Joe Q. White Public thinks and knows about politics, understands two things about Scott Walker: that he busted a public union while cutting taxes and that he needs to get some of that infomercial spray to obscure that gleaming spot on the back of his head.

      It will only get worse under the bright lights in the debate studios, she says. I suspect it might determine her vote.

  27. TRUMP trump TRUMP trump TRUMP
    Trumpety, Trumpety. TRUMP
    TRUMP TRUMP TRUMP TRUMP TRU,,,,

  28. Hey, reason? I’d really like to read a post about Donald Trump. Did you know he’s awful and currently running for president?

    /Lou Reed

    1. TWO ENTHUSIASTIC THUMBS UP

      /Omar Sharif

  29. Did Trump fuck Welch’s mom or something?

  30. Drunk driver hit and run?
    Visa prevents deadly crash
    He will save us all

    1. A credit card saves?!
      Looking at you MasterCard
      Did you stop a crime?

  31. Trump makes the sordid underbelly of the GOP more undeniable, hence all the hand waving and complaining on any focus on him by the usual suspects here.

    1. Or, you know, he could just be hilariously stupid regardless of context.

      1. The defensiveness of our right leaning regulars suggests that’s not what’s going on here.

        1. Bo Cara is here again
          Arguing insipidly
          Go away you boring twat

          1. Haha, Trump makes your squatting here even more uncomfortable! Poor thing.

            1. A bothersome rash
              Swollen, inflamed pustule
              The feeble blog troll

              1. Crusty: it’s not like I said I love him or anything!

                1. Bo and The Donald
                  Making love in the moonlight
                  Where is your god now?

  32. You been botoxed!

    BOOYAH!

  33. REASON flips its shit
    Over rich orangutan;
    Lou Reed haz a sad

  34. Desert winds rise up
    Dust fills the Mexicans’ eyes
    Trump Americans’

    1. *vigorous applause*

  35. Let the strong winds of
    Subsidized casinos fill
    America’s skies

  36. And his buildings are garish. And his clothing line is a gauche. And his golf courses are are snore.

    1. “You misspelled ‘classy’.” – The Donald

      1. His helicopter
        Inspires vile hatred
        His hair is perfect

  37. Is the end yet nigh?
    Our long, national nightmare.
    Post no more, Reason!

  38. I see Reason has joined various other media outlets in their ‘give an egotistical attention whore all the attention he could ever want’ plan. Let me know how that works out.

    1. The unanimity of the talking point is just terrific!

      1. Hey Bo, I seeing you’re still seeing imaginary Republicans.

        1. Why all the hand waving there John?

          1. And Bo continues to validate his image of ignorance. It couldn’t be that one article covering Trump is sufficient to cover his idiocy. Nope, to Bo we all have to be secret evil Republicans! How awfully libertarian of him, collectivizing everyone into

            You construct anti-intellectual delusions rather than actually address people’s actual positions so you can lambast a collective you disdain. Which really means you’re no different from the shitlords that support Trump’s idiocy.

            But please,

            1. *Fucking phone

              And Bo continues to validate his image of ignorance. It couldn’t be that one article covering Trump is sufficient to cover his idiocy. Nope, to Bo we all have to be secret evil Republicans! How awfully libertarian of him, collectivizing everyone into neat little categories to demonize them.

              You construct anti-intellectual delusions rather than actually address people’s actual positions so you can lambast a collective you disdain. Which really means you’re no different from the shitlords that support Trump’s idiocy.

              But please, continue to show off your foolishness. Why not call some more anarcho-capitalists secret Republicans? It certainly doesn’t make you look delusional.

            2. All across the media world the Rights message is pretty much the hand waving going on here. He’s embarrassing your Party and making it obvious, of course you wish the writers here would let it go.

              After all, you only went with him a few times.

              1. Bo, I get that you’re an idiot who fails to understand any kind of political nuance or complexity because it would shatter the pathetic little delusion you have going on, but I’m going to explain this in simple terms so you understand: I. Am. Canadian. I have very few sympathies for the Republicans. A smarter man would at least try to call me a Tory. But the Tories are pretty pro-immigration. The world doesn’t conform to your imaginary political bubble of evil right-wingers vs. you.

                See, Bo, there’s this element of libertarianism called individualism. My opinion is based on my own perspective that Welch’s article covered Trump’s idiocy well and that they didn’t need to plaster his face over the next four articles saying the exact same things. Your delusion is what turns me into a secret Republican. But please, continue to collective me into your evil right wing cabal. Prove what a great libertarian you are.

                1. Bo thinks I’m a secret Republican despite the fact that I oppose most American military interventions, the fact that I’d legalize prostitution and drugs, and the fact that I think we should totally eliminate government involvement in marriage and I’d allow people to form polygamous relationships through contract law.

                  You know – all of those super Republican policy positions.

  39. The troll emerges
    Soon to get the fight he wants
    Punji stick, covered in poop

    1. It hunkers down to defend its loved ones

    2. Hooting, poop is flung!
      Back you away, warns Warty
      Too late as dung hits.

      1. Damn, messed up the link.

        Well here it is, safe for work. http://theworstthingsforsale.c…..wing-poop/

      2. Damn, messed up the link.

        Well here it is, safe for work. http://theworstthingsforsale.c…..wing-poop/

    3. “I see red people”
      clutching his fake law degree
      masturbates vainly

      1. Of course Gilmore’s on board.

        1. His team is losing
          The writing is on the wall
          Bo will double down

          1. Look at the chorus of hand waving here, someone’s doubling down for Team, but it ain’t me.

          1. Why won’t they talk about SJW’s, oh why! Lol

      2. Oh fuck these are really funny.

  40. Cruelest joke: Trump genes
    Donnie Junior inherits
    His dad’s weird hairline

  41. An email was sent
    By the Jacket this morning
    Reads; troll our readers

    Post nothing but Trump
    A bonus to the writer
    Who brings the most hate

    1. And who but a regular reader of about half of the commentariat could have though that a bunch of posts about so easily an unlibertarian target would have riled up so many? At least we know the writers here read the comments

    2. Yokeltarians
      Orgy of angry typing
      Kochtopus smiles

      1. O college students!
        O drivers of pickup trucks!
        Bring forth violent words!

      2. Tar-Brush at Ready
        Intellectual Preening
        Let Sneering Commence

  42. Here, this might help:

    Ash vs Evil Dead

    1. Bruce Campbell returns
      The trailer is superb
      Approach with caution

      1. Oh shit I’m sorry
        This may not be safe for work
        Tundra will repost

    2. Tundra, I was having a shitty day. These shitty trump articles were not helping. You know what did help? That trailer. I’ve smiled for the first time today and now feel like I can move on to something productive.

      1. Glad I could help! Oh, and:

        “My heart is jack hammering like a quarterback on prom night!”

  43. Reason readers fall
    For most obvious of jokes
    Fail to not be trolled

  44. He dons the mantle
    Against the cold, dark (brown) night
    Donald, truth-teller

    1. Despite our Trump Hate
      We will never forget the fact
      That Nikki is the worst

  45. Look what Nikki starts
    At first I applauded her
    But she is the worst

    1. What nonsense Swiss posts
      This is most fun had all day
      Nikki, Joan of Arc

      1. OK, “Nikki, Joan of Arc” made me laugh….you win this round, God Lizard.

    2. dammit.

  46. Y’all getting worried that Trump will keep gaining traction in your favorite poetical party? Sure seems like it.

    1. Short stupid failure
      Attempts to insult others
      Substitute teacher

    2. Now comes joe from lowell,
      A tiny man, with so much
      To compensate for

    3. It makes even ostensible more difficult to achieve.

    4. Silly joe from lowell
      “Poetical party” is
      A John-worthy flub

  47. Don’t worry everyone, some variety is on the way. Reason can now throw some Scott Walker denunciations into the mix.

    Immigrant advocacy group: Walker policies inspired by racism

    Christine Neumann-Ortiz, executive director of Milwaukee-based Voces de la Frontera, said Walker has an enforcement-first agenda ? meaning he wants people living in the country illegally to leave.

    “He supports an enforcement-first agenda and wants to limit legal migration to the United States,” Neumann-Ortiz said. “To me that is a clear expression of someone who is really trying to sow the seeds of racial and ethnic hatred. “

    1. Walker hardened his stance on immigration in preparation for the primary. I’d assume he’s just pandering to the “close the border” types.

  48. Reason spills ink on a freak show, Bo swoops in to make retarded arguments.

    Happy Monday, everybody.

  49. Shorter paleos (if that): why do you keep talking about him, we only went out a few times!!!

    Lol

    1. “The Outraged White Men”
      He Cries from parent’s basement
      “Why won’t they love me?”

      1. no one here could be dim enough to think I’m working to make people here like me, unlike yourself.

        1. Neither Love or hate
          Satisfies Narcissism
          Only Attention

    2. So I guess we’re all eating nothing but meat and vegetables now?

  50. The Comb-Over Racist
    Book already Ghost-Written
    Milks free media

    1. “The Comb-Over Racist”

      Six syllable sentence
      Does not belong in haikus
      Gilmore makes penance

      1. “Six syllable sentence”

        I just realized this is also six syllables, so I’m just going to pretend I was making a meta joke and didn’t fuck up my counting.

      2. Aw, fuck man. Can’t we just cancel out “the”? No haiku-mulligans???!

      3. *O’er.

  51. I’ve been traveling so I missed all the Trump posts. It doesn’t look like he’ll be a REASON BEAT! pin-up boy like Jared Polis, Butch Otter, Thaddeus McCotter and Jeff Flake.

  52. Could anything be dumber than ‘no, we just don’t like all this focus on a fool nobody, it’s not Team sad over the writers skewering the latest GOP goofball of the month.’ After all, these are the same people who’d love having a bunch of posts about nobody’s like Amanda Marcotte or Krugman, who couldn’t poll double digits in their own homes. Pathetic.

    1. I agree with you and you’re still a total asshole.

      Why don’t you post another out of context quote from Right-Wing watch where they pretend a Republican said something they didn’t actually say? You know, really prove that you’re taking a principled stand here and aren’t just on the other side politically from the Republican sympathizers.

      1. “I agree with you and you’re still a total asshole.”

        This is a much more accurate libertarian tagline than “free minds and free markets.”

    2. “Bo Cara Esq.|2015/07/13 16:19:05|#5436468

      Could anything be dumber….”

      You’re certainly making best-efforts. Keep trying, sport.

  53. The Japanese are taking over! Trump was right!

  54. Trump is a douchbag and an idiot. I wouldn’t want to have to spend five minutes talking to him. The reason that he’s doing well is that there are millions if not tens of millions of Americans who think that the border is a problem, and most of the mainstream media pretend that they do not exist or that that they’re all a bunch of anti-immigrant racists because they don’t fall in line and that pisses them off to no end.

  55. I remember when Rush Limabaugh was first on the air nationally, and all the libtards were falling all over themselves describing him as a “buffoon”, “blowhard”, “mean-spirited”, “racist” blah blah blah.
    .
    Now 27 years later, almost all those people are forgotten and Rush has moved the argument FAR to the right. And NOBODY considers him a “buffoon” anymore..
    .
    What you morons have obviously overlooked is that Trump just gave a spontaneous 45 minute speech to fifteen THOUSAND people, without notes – and got several standing ovations.
    .
    Let me emphasize that – his speech was SPONTANEOUS, lasted forty-five (45) minutes, and was delivered WITHOUT NOTES.
    .
    Compare this to obama who is functionally mute when his teleprompter goes down.
    .
    1) There is NO WAY that somebody could do that if they didn’t BELIEVE what they were saying, and 2) Only a very few people have that degree of stage presence..
    .
    Trump is the real deal. Add to his poise on-stage, his ability to self-fund his campaign and his understanding of the concerns of ordinary Americans, and he is a force to be reckoned with.
    .
    A Trump/Cruz ticket would NOT be afraid of taking Hillary to task over Benghazi, White Water, Vince Foster and a dozen other scandals reaching all the way back to Watergate.
    .
    Every Conservative should be supporting Trump for that prospect alone..

    1. Argumentum ad populum, amounting to “all people should be stupid…” and no, failing to prepare for a speech is NOT a virtue. It’s a sign of disrespect for the audience.

      1. You assume that he NEEDS to prepare – that’s the point. He know his subject matter so well that he is ALWAYS prepared.
        .
        And your argument is apparently that all people who support Trump already ARE stupid. As with Rush Limbaugh, that argument has failed plenty of times before..

    2. …and while I”m at it, why do Republicans and Democrats have to make arguments that ASSume they’re speaking to “the other” party? I mean really? Do you think any of us is in danger of voting for a third Obama term–even if possible?

      1. Most politicians realize that there are a group of voters who are undecided. Their mistake is trying to soft-sell their message in order to appeal to those people. They alienate their base and they DON’T reach the undecided.
        .
        The people in the middle are simply less interested in politics. An exciting candidate like Trump is more likely to get their attention than a namby-pamby canidate like Romney.

  56. The thought of what Trump voters would do in a voting booth is something I want to erase from my memory.

    1. And what do YOU do in a voting booth?

  57. HAs Reason become a hate-Trump media outlet? So far Gilolespie has falen on his ass with his misleadingand dopey article and now this. Get a life Reason.

    1. They are scared to death – I’m not quite sure of what..

  58. Three consecutive Trump articles? Cancel my subscription!

    [altogether too lazy to check if this complaint has already been registered]

    1. Everyone complains. Everyone comments anyway. This place deserves Trump.

  59. my buddy’s step-aunt makes $68 /hour on the laptop . She has been without a job for nine months but last month her check was $99350 just working on the laptop for a few hours. check my source
    http://www.jobnet10.com

  60. the beltway gang and main st media are shaking in their boots about is not that Trump is a serious contender for the job. Their concern is what or how much he’s going to reveal. Calling America ” a hell hole” could be the shot over the bow. ! trillion on the war on drugs .Yet the media said Gary Webb got the story wrong. the main st media the times the post(s) network news shows all on board the jobs moving off shore and all the dope A pillar industry in the US economy was an accident, and has no correlation Shaking in their boots is the media that that Trump will put the lite of day on the truth and if he does he could very well be choosing a cabinet in ’16

  61. Google pay 97$ per hour my last pay check was $8500 working 1o hours a week online. My younger brother friend has been averaging 12k for months now and he works about 22 hours a week. I cant believe how easy it was once I tried it out.
    This is wha- I do…… ?????? http://www.online-jobs9.com

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