Heineken: The Beer of Bitcoin


The key to Bitcoin becoming a widely used currency is, naturally, lots of people and institutions accepting it generally as payment for their goods and services.

While this has no immediate consumer relevance, it's a good sign for Bitcoin fans that Heineken beer's official twitter feed has come out Bitcoin-positive. (Via NewsBTC):

Reason on Bitcoin.

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  1. Heineken, blech. I think I’ll wait a little longer.

    1. That was my thought.

  2. When Green Flash or Eggenberg get on the BTC train, sign me up.

    1. GF’s triple IPA Green Bullet is like squeezing wort-saturated hop leaves into your mouth.

      1. A Raston Bot sighting! My hop bines all died this past year before producing, as my lazy ass didn’t plant them until too late in the season.

        I’d just consumed a Green Bullet prior to posting. Citrusy and unremarkable, not really fit for Green Flash, a very respectable American brewery.

        1. Dead or just dormant? It’s a hardy plant. Even without strict pruning or watering, you can get good cone production by year #3.

          1. They sprouted in the plastic bag, but when I planted them out next to my barn, they never made an above-ground appearance. I didn’t put them out for at least a month after I received them in the mail, so I’m sure it’s human error rather than the vendor. But we’ll pick up another batch next year and try again.

    1. I think they mean real as in existing in physical reality and being a beverage made from grain, hops and yeast.

      1. So…Kathleen Sebelius’ snatch?


        1. Amazingly, that idea had not crossed my mind.

        2. She’s a toad of human being, but I would lay odds her snatch is a wonderland of blissful revelry.

    1. Here we were were talking about beer, and you have to go and Balko us.

      1. On Monday. Just before x-mas.

    2. WTF! Think of teh childrunz!

  3. Heineken, the beer of skunk is more like it.

    1. while I disagree with your position, I will fight to the death for your right to hold it.

    2. Not in the mini-kegs.

      Light causes skunking.

      Brown bottles protect against about 95% of UV. Green and clear are open invitations to skunk.

      1. Yup. I know all of that full well. And that is why Heineken is the King of Skunk. Only rival for that title are some Mexican lagers, but even those are hit and miss. You can always count on a Heiny in a green bottle to be skunky as hell.

      2. I was amazed the first time I had non-skunky heineken. Not my first choice, but without the skunk, it’s entirely drinkable.

  4. I remember back in the 80s when Heineken was the exotic imported beer; it and Grolsch. Thank Jeebus for the craft brewery revolution. Beer was so, so bad back then.

    1. Those were dark times. I remember when Dos Equies and Becks’ were for special occasions.

      1. When Sam Adams broke onto the scene (I got it early since I only lived an hour and a quarter from Boston), it was a revelation. One Christmas Eve at my parents’ huge annual party, a friend brought an entire case of Sam Adams Triple Bock. That was delicious and fun (that shit is strong; 17.5% ABV).

        1. I remember when I first went to Texas and had Shiner Bock. It was a revelation. We didn’t get Adams out west until the craft beer thing was in full swing.

          1. Shiner is only marginally better than the BMCs.

            It and Yuengling. Their slogan should be, “We only mostly suck!”

            1. Shiner is a hundred times better than Yuenling. Shiner is a perfectly acceptable German Bock.

                1. It is amazing. But its a doppelbock, not a bock. Big difference. Bigger than the difference between an IPA and a DIPA.

                2. I have had that Episiarch. And yes it is amazing. Had it on tap in Germany. Good shit.

                  1. I’ll be going to Germany next year and hope to find it on tap all over the place. But I can get it in bottles here in Seattle, or go to Feierabend and get it on tap.

                    1. Minors are not allowed at Feierabend.

                      Warms steel in my heart. ‘I want to go to there’, to quote Miss Lemon.

                3. Epi, I’m going right to Total Wine in an hour and getting that. They have a great import selection. Damn. I. have. to. have. it!

                  1. It’s a great beer. I see they have a Total Wine in Bellevue, but I go to a great place in West Seattle for my beer needs.

              1. Bullshit.

                Shiner Bock isnt marginally a bock.

                Its an adjunct amber lager, just like Yuengling.

                They are 2 versions of the same thing. I dont drink enough of either to tell you which is better, but there aint room for 100x for either. Thats like saying that Coors Light is 100x better than Bud Light. I have no fucking clue which is better, but there aint that much difference.

                1. You are full of shit Rob. Shiner is drinkable and Yuengling isn’t. It is really that simple. Yeungling is bitter and tasteless. Shiner is not bitter and has halfway decent taste.

                  1. They are the same fucking style of beer.

                    You may have a preference, but neither is any good.

                    And Shiner Bock isnt a fucking bock.

                    1. They are the same fucking style of beer.

                      So what? That doesn’t mean one isn’t better than the other.

                    2. That doesn’t mean one isn’t better than the other.

                      Can you not fucking read?

                      That is what I said. But they are so close that there is no way one is 100x better than the other.

                      Even accounting for the clear hyperbole, they are marginally different at best. If you prefer Shiner, cool, but they arent radically different like you implied.

                    3. they are marginally different at best.

                      Sure they are marginally different, if you consider that one sucks and the other is pretty good to just be a “marginal difference”. And yeah 100 times is hyperbole but only by a little.

                    4. Fun with “objective” sources:

                      Beer Advocate lists Yuengling Lager as an American Amber Lager. It lists Shiner Bock as a Bock (taking their word for it I guess).

                      Ratings: 78/80 for Yuengling (78 from all ratings, 80 from the Alstrom Bros, who run the site). 73/63 for Shiner.

                      RateBeer lists Yeungling as a Pale Lager and Shiner as an Amer Lager. Yuengling scores 27, Shiner a 17.

                      *BA uses a 50-100 wine style system, RB uses a percentile-type system.

                      The universe of beer raters disagrees with you. I dont think you are wrong, you prefer what you prefer, and I dont have a dog in the YL v SB fight, but I find them marginally different at best.

                      Blind taste test would be interesting if I gave a damn about them.

                    5. Shiner Bock is 13 IBUs. Yuengling is 13-15 IBUs. Both #s from google searches and that seems about right.

                      I doubt you could distinguish the bitterness in a blind taste test.

                      And I dont think Ive ever heard anyone call Yuengling Lager bitter before.

                    6. I bet I could tell the difference IBUs or not. They don’t taste the same.

                    7. Taste, probably. Bitterness? Nope.

      2. and PBR was going away on its own, with no irony whatsoever.

        1. I remember when we used to have to buy PBR in college CAUSE IT’S ALL WE COULD AFFORD.

          Bad times, bad times….

          1. Mickey’s Bigmouths. We did the math and figured out you got more alcohol content per dollar with Mickey’s than any other available beer. God that stuff was nasty.

            1. The way to drink crappy beer is to put it in the freezer for 45 minutes. If you time it right, you get beer slushies.

              1. Why didn’t we ever think of that? Interesting idea.

                1. Accidental invention. I put some beers in the freezer one day to cool them off, and overestimated the time it would take to cool them off.

                  I was delighted with the discovery, though. In 1988, the local liquor place had cases of something called Texas Light available for $5.50 a case. I drank a lot of TL slushies.

                  I was also underage at the time, but I had a mustache and long hair, so I could almost always get beer. I remember walking back to my apartment with two cases when a cop car with two cops drives right to me. I was pants-pissing scared, but I figured running would be a bad idea, so I was trying to play it cool and walked over to them.

                  The cop rolls down his window and say “Hey, you need some help with those?” and they drive away, laughing.

                2. There was a liquor store that sold some beer called Texas Light for $5.50 a case (in 1988). I drank a lot of TL slushies.

                  I was also underage back then. I remember coming back from the store with a couple cases. They were in 4 6-pack flats, so I was struggling a bit.

                  Just then, I see a cop car driving right at me. They started to slow down, and the cop in the passenger side was rolling down his window. I was piss-pants scared, but figured running would probably not be a good idea, so I tried to be cool and walked right up to the cop car.

                  I hefted the beer over to the cops, and the one on the passenger side says “hey, you need some help with those?” and they drove away, laughing.

                  1. Ah, I thought the 3PM gremlins had eaten my first comment. Sorry.

              2. Did this with my 40oz Crazy Horse. Two would set me up just fine.

            2. I’ve been thinking about just for an experiment putting a malt liquor into a Brita filter 4x, then freezing a 40oz bottle of it down to to 24 oz. concentrate, a low boiling at 155f to burn out the bitter alcohols that give the malt liquors their headache inducing nastiness, and seeing if the results are better than the product unconditioned.

              It works with cheap vodka.

              1. Seems like it would be easier and cheaper to just homebrew something you like.

                1. I do, rob. This is not about ease. I’m a man on a mission to make the best of the shitty world around us. If I can teach just one vagrant to live it up like a dandy with what he already has, I’ve accomplished something.

                  1. Well, okay then, go for it.

          2. I actually like PBR for cheap, low flavor beer. IT was even better when it came in the big waxed box of refillable bar bottles.

            1. Agreed, it’s easily the best in the bad, cheap beer category.

          3. In college I once got stuck in line behind two guys scraping change out of their pockets for a pair of Natty Light tall boys. It was pathetic.

    2. Yeah, but Grolsch had those cool bottles with the ceramic buckles. Those bottles were home brewing made easy.

      1. Grolsch actually isn’t too bad for a boring-as-shit lager. But if I’m going to drink shit, it’s going to be Schlitz or Milwaukee’s Best or Natty Light. I mean, if you’re going to slum, fucking slum. Don’t half ass it. In fact, just go right for the Colt 45…menthol. Yup, that is real. I’ve had it.

        (forces back rising gorge)

        1. In Maryland we have National Bohemian or Natty Bo as it is known. It is actually a good shitty American lager. Very drinkable.

          1. I hate to admit it, but I actually like Genesee Cream Ale. Definitely my crap beer of choice.

            1. You’re a sick man, BP. I once had too many Genesee Cream Ales in Albion, NY because the dive I went to there was selling them for 50 cents. Then I went back to my motel room and watched Star Trek V, and enjoyed it. Ponder that.

              1. You admit to liking Star Trek V, and then have the temerity to call me sick? The depths of your depravity know no bounds, Episiarch.

                I could be on heroin and I wouldn’t enjoy ST V. Ponder that.

          2. You know what’s not terrible, especially as a pool/beach beer? Trader Joe’s Name Tag Lager. And it’s dirt cheap: $2.99 per six pack. That’s hard to beat. It’s shotgun time!!!

            1. I could see that. Two Buck Chuck is very drinkable wine. Trader Joes seems to know cheap booze.

            2. Unibroue which makes the totally awesome Fin du Monde and Trois Pistoles contracts with Trader Joe’s, so expect some good stuff from their inbrand.

          3. Narraganset is similarly cheap and pretty good here in New England.

        2. just go right for the Colt 45…menthol, Yup, that is real. I’ve had it.

          (forces back rising gorge)

          Didn’t you read the warning label? Only Billy Dee Williams can drink that.

          1. Billy Dee was so cool back in the day he could even make Colt 45 seem appetizing.

            1. Or at least effective.

          2. They told me they fixed it and made it drinkable! I trusted them to fix it! It’s not my fault!

        3. We got some seasonal shit from New Belgium brewing a couple weeks ago that was supposed to be some kind of like, wheat IPA–some kind of hoppy white beer or something. God only knows why we decided to try it, but as it turns out, this is basically a fancy craft-beer way to replicate shitty lager like that. Not enough body to the beer to sustain the hops, so it’s just kind of like water with some hops to it…yeah it was bad. I think it’s called Adirondack? Don’t buy it.

          1. That is because hops is the hipster monster that is eating the American beer industry. Everything must be overhopped and sold as some kind of IPA or apparently it won’t sell or they kick you out of the craft brewers’ club or something.

            Wheat IPA? Are you fucking kidding me? Just make a wheat beer or make an IPA.

            1. Squirrels ate first attempt.

              Just make a wheat beer or make an IPA.

              Agree with this 100%.

              Everything else you wrote above is bullshit.

              1. It is not bullshit at all. Nikki’s Fat Tire example shows how it is not. Fat Tire didn’t come up with that beer by accident. They did it because you can sell anything if you just throw some hops in it and call it an IPA.

                1. Nikki didnt mention Fat Tire.

                  And Fat Tire is as far from an IPA as you can come.

                  I know you meant “New Belgium” but Im not letting you off the hook, that isnt a fucking typo.

                  1. You know what I meant. New Belgium, which makes Fat Tire and thus the mistake in my post.

                    And the existence of one place in America where they haven’t destroyed the beer with hops, doesn’t disprove my point.

                    If you like over hopped crap good for you. Some people like spam too. I don’t.

                    1. They are hundreds of breweries not trying to make overhopped beers.

                      Some do. Those arent the ones selling well, its the more restrained versions. Too hoppy for many people still, but they arent overbalanced.

                      I dont have a problem with you not liking hops, but no need to spout bullshit like:

                      “That is because hops is the hipster monster that is eating the American beer industry. Everything must be overhopped and sold as some kind of IPA or apparently it won’t sell or they kick you out of the craft brewers’ club or something.”

                      Its flat out false. For one thing, the hipsters are drinking PBR. And the one example I used shows that you dont get kicked out of the craft brewers club.

                      Hell, name me an overhopped Sam Adams beer? There isnt one. The Brewers Assoc is bending every rule possible to keep them in the club.

                    2. John… I’ve got to side with robc on this one. Off the top of my head, and distributed to Ohio are the following breweries that focus on non-hoppy beers:

                      Jolly Pumpkin
                      Hoppin’ Frog
                      Great Lakes

                    3. Although, my favorite Bells beer and my favorite Great Lakes beer are both on the hoppy side.

                      Two hearted may be my favorite beer in the universe. Although, its a very balance IPA, good malt backbone for the hops. Its my problem with many IPAs, not the huge hopping but the lack of malt to support it somewhat.

                    4. The Two Hearted is an amazing beer, and it’s a staple when I’m out. My favorite from Bell’s has got to be Oberon… on a hot summer day, I can drink far too many of those.

                      Curious on the Great Lakes selection, the Burning River, Commodore Perry, and Lake Erie Monster are all middle of the road to me. While Nosferatu is good, it’s far cry from the Blackout Stout (either barrel aged or standard).

                    5. Burning River was what I was referring to. It and Edmund Fitzgerald are my favorite GL beers.

                    6. they haven’t destroyed the beer with hops

                      Ive tasted a few of those, they are few and far between. Very rare.

                      Just because you dont like it doesnt mean they have destroyed beer.

                      You sound like a “market failure” screaming liberal.

                2. Metropolitan in Chicago proves you wrong.

                  Check and mate.

                3. you can sell anything if you just throw some hops in it and call it an IPA.

                  That may be true, but if it is, it probably has something to do with people liking that type of beer. If people didn’t like that, then the hip thing in brewing would be something else that would annoy a different set of people. And if no one likes the white IPA or whatever the one Nikki was complaining about, then they probably won’t make it again.
                  I happen to love hoppy beers and think it is great that that is a popular thing in craft brewing at the moment.

                  1. The other thing John missed is that New Belgium is very specifically a counter-example to that point.

                    They sell Fat Tire to pay the bills and to fund all the small scale stuff that they really want to do. The white IPA isnt being made because anything with hops sells. Its being made because, apparently, they wanted to. If it was about what sells, they would have made another batch of Fat Tire.

          2. I’m not a big New Belgium fan in general, so yeah, thanks for the warning. I’ll pass.

      2. I have a ton of fliptops, only they are Uerige instead of Grolsch. Works better on the initial end.

  5. Looks like someone lite the beer snob signal.


  6. God how I hate Heineken.

    that is all

    1. So bitter and nasty. I just don’t get it.

      1. I admit that I like piss lagers – mostly Labatt Blue. Tennents or McEwens when I’m in Scotland. Hell, I’ll drink MGD. So I’m no beer snob.

        But….Heineken? *barf*

        1. I don’t mind the watery lagers sometimes. They are good on a really hot day. But I would rather have tasteless than bitter swill, which is what Heiniken is.

        2. I have a soft spot for High Life on a hot day.

          1. If I’m going cheap, that is the one.

    2. I drink Heineken in Las Vegas and at European airports. It’s not that bad.

  7. Better (snobbery aside) would have been something like:

    “Our vision: Buy real beer with real money. #bitcoin”

    1. “Make Your Next Beer On Us! – Bitcoin”

  8. Heineken!? Fuck that shit. Pabst Blue Ribbon!

    1. I can’t believe it took so long. Everyone but you is a cultural illiterate.

  9. Heineken, the beer that beer elitist snobs love to hate.

    Those draught cans are really good, if done right. You have to put them in a bucket and ice them. It needs to be really cold and stay that way. If you prep it like that, you will only get at most a half glass of foam off the top.

    I will take it over pretty much 100% of big brewery American beers, like Spudweezer and the other crapola they churn out around these here parts.

  10. It needs to be really cold and stay that way.

    I have a problem with any beer that needs that.

    But, yeah, Heineken is marginally better than the standard american BMC beers.

    1. Marginally better? Bud and most of the other standard Murikan beers taste like ginger ale with rubbing alcohol poured in them.

      1. Yes, marginally better than ginger ale+rubbing alcohol.

      2. What the deal with ‘Murikan’? I know you well enough to know you’re not a boneheaded commie easily pleased with himself with cheap rhetorical phrasing.

        1. Murikan is because I’m sort of pissed off at our government. It’s just another of my impotent ways at expressing my outrage. Please feel free to ignore it, if you don’t like it.

      3. taste like ginger ale with rubbing alcohol poured in them.

        Why do people like to make these ridiculous and plainly false comparisons so much? Budweiser may or may not be crap, but, though I have never tried it, I am almost entirely certain that Bud tastes nothing like ginger ale with rubbing alcohol in it.

        And I’d probably choose Bud over Heineken most days (in bottles anyway). I think a better description of the American bland lagers is “beer flavored soda”.

    2. Exactly this. A really good beer can be drunk at almost room temperature and keep its taste profile. Especially a solid Russian Imperial Stout that just gets better as it gets warmer. That’s my idea of heaven.

      1. You’re comparing apples to oranges there. How may lagers do you know that taste really swell at room temp?

        1. Commercially speaking, can’t think of any, but given the style profile of a lager lends itself to balance it would be simple to brew one that is even tastier at room temperature. I have to sample at room temperature, and its a factor I always deal with and usually its a matter of expanding the maltose strains because tongues tend to like complexity in that taste profile.

          1. In other words, I would brew with two grains that create a contrast like this sweet honey malt


            and this spicier rye


            And the flavor when brewed together is bound to increase in yumminess the warmer it gets. Lagers are just a brew with a yeast strain that succeeds at lower temperatures than other ale yeast, hence they tend to be smooth and balanced. Throw in malts with some complexity, and you’ll get something that tilts that a bit.

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