Stock Market Shrugs at Shutdown, So Do Vets, Venezuela Expels US Diplomats: P.M. Links

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Credit: bmills / Foter / CC BY The stock market has responded to the disastrous government shutdown by … posting big gains! Well, then.
- World War II vets don't need the government to tell them how or when to visit a national monument, thank you very much. Republicans proposed a plan to reopen national parks, but the White House rejected it.
- Thousands have been affected by online glitches and the inability to log in to a much-demanded service. I'm talking, of course, about today's launch of Grand Theft Auto V's online component, which has not gone well. How are we supposed to take out our frustrations over the glitchy health care exchange sites?
- Venezuela has expelled three U.S. diplomats, accusing them of trying to sabotage the economy. Critics note that the move is a smokescreen to cover the country's huge problems.
- A human rights group estimates the death toll so far in Syria's civil war stands at 115,000.
- An imprisoned Pussy Riot member's hunger strike in Russia lasted nine days before she ended it. But she's promising to do it again if she's not moved to another prison with better conditions.
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World War II vets don't need the government to tell them how or when to visit a national monument...
You know who else had military men invading territory thought to have been secured?
Kim Il Sung?
Stannis?
Goldfinger?
Robb Stark?
TOO SOON!!!!
That should have been preceded by a 100,000-word Wall of Text.
Army in the Navy game?
John Winger?
Jeff Winger?
Roosevelt?
Me when playing Risk?
Napolean?
The stock market has responded to the disastrous government shutdown by ? posting big gains!
The GOP and their fat cat allies on Wall Street. Someone alert the Occupiers.
Just the Kochs. They are so rich that they can artificially boost the stock market unilaterally.
Technically, that would be bilaterally.
Whatever are you suggesting?
That I know greek and latin roots?
You know no such thing, Tonio. Because unilateral and bilateral are made-up Latin! Report to the Disembowelment Chamber for processing.
But the Pentavirate is real latin, right?
Whether the Pentavirate was originally good Latin doesn't much matter, since they could make it so with their time machine.
BS! That stuff is like a hundred years old! Nobody understands it!
The biune Kochtopus is contained within one Kochhead. It is a Divine Mystery.
Nice.
It is but one Kraken with many (two) tentacles!
At lunch over the weekend with some local PC Berkeley leftists (who are actually pretty good people otherwise, just need to keep them off politics) one of them actually brought up the Koch brothers as if they were the cause of all problems in the world. I thought that was just a HitnRun meme ridiculing New Republic types, but I guess even average lefty joes think that way!
It's quite ridiculous, especially when you consider what a drop in the bucket their total wealth is compared to everything else. Especially the government.
Their armed forces are substantially smaller as well.
Kochthulu, bifurcated god of R'lyeh!
The stock market has responded to the disastrous government shutdown by ? posting big gains!
Well, as long as the Federal Reserve stays open, QE to the moon.
+1
Because bad is really good and good is really bad.
Just imagine how much bigger the gains would be if the government had not shutdown!
Or actually DID shutdown!
Venezuela has expelled three U.S. diplomats, accusing them of trying to sabotage the economy. Critics note that the move is a smokescreen to cover the country's huge problems
I can imagine an Iranian hostage crisis type situation, only the Venezuelans storm the embassy looking for toilet paper.
With the shutdown, will our Marines be able to prevent the Venezuelans from squeezing the Charmin?
What difference, at this point, does it make?
You want our tp quilting technology to fall in to the hands and buttocks of those savages?! You na?ve fool!
There is a tp quilting technology gap that can only be filled by more government spending.
Wait, I think I saw this one. Are the diplomats named Howard, Fine and Howard?
I believe it was titled Three Pests in a Mess.
If I recall, they DID sell something for people to put on their asses.
+3 of our finest diplomatic personnel
Venezuela has expelled three U.S. diplomats, accusing them of trying to sabotage the economy. Critics note that the move is a smokescreen to cover the country's huge problems
What else can you do when the Koch bros are intentionally creating a toilet paper supply crisis in your country?
damned shitty Kochs...
ISWYDT
I really wish people in the media would stop referring to this as a "shutdown." Since the vast bulk of government is fully operational, like a Death Star, I don't see how that word applies.
Regional governors now have direct control over their territories.
But what of the imperial snit-fit?
"Let me be clear, it would be a shame if any disasters befell the states, and a declaration of a disaster area had to be delayed. A terrible shame."
That's a nice state you've got there. Shame if anything happened to it.
For people in Detroit: 2 down, 1 to go!
Fear will keep the states in line.
I really wish people in the media would stop referring to this as a "shutdown."
Agreed. It really is much more like a showdown.
More like a hoedown.
Don't mind if I do!
Turkey in the straw
Turkey in the hay
Turkey in the straw
Turkey in the hay
Roll 'em up and twist 'em up
A high tuck a-haw
And hit 'em up a tune called
Turkey in the Straw
I'll just leave this here.
http://www.peta.org/action/act.....-Drop.aspx
WTF? That can't be real. I mean, it's a WKRP episode.
Speaking of WKRP Episodes...here's Johnny Fever on Dragnet.
I'd like to drop that turkey...in an oven!
Well, millions of women and children dying in the streets right now and you baggers are still complaining that some little miniscule part of government, so small it could go down a bath tub drain, is still open.
There really was nothing left to cut. We were 1.5 million government workers away from anarchy.
They had to close the visible parts of the government, like the exterior of this Death Star.
Republicans proposed a plan to reopen national parks, but the White House rejected it.
Remember, it's the stubborn GOP keeping every precious thing our government provides us shut down.
It's unserious. Forcing a law down our throats that no one really wanted in the first place, that we extra don't want now, and that will damage our already weakened economy, that's serious.
THE LAW WAS LEGALLY PASSED BY DEMOCRATICALLY ELECTED REPRESENTATIVES THROUGH BUDGET RECONCILIATION.
Yes, and it's legally opposed by the house of Congress where budgets must originate.
By the way, are continuing resolutions for spending even legal?
About as legal as individual mandates, crop quotas, labor market price fixing, and wealth distribution programs.
That ship has sailed, no doubt.
Legal? The legislature makes the laws, so everything they do is legal.
The debt ceiling law was passed by both houses of Congress and signed by the President. Why is there even any negotiation about changing it? It's settled law. Just stop spending so much, and they won't have to borrow more than is legal.
Dear Prudence: Help! My raging libido is ruining my marriage!
All my feelings of self-worth hinge on how often I can get my husband to have sex with me. How can I get past this? I've always, and I really do mean always, had a raging libido. During my first marriage, I had sex with several other people because my husband couldn't keep up with me. When I married my second husband eight years ago, I promised myself that I'd be faithful, and I have been, but I fantasize constantly about having sex with others. My husband and I have sex three or four times a week, and I masturbate at least twice a week, but that's not enough to keep me happy. Whenever my husband needs a day off, I feel unattractive and rejected, and I start feeling sorry for myself. Rationally, I know he loves me, and I know he thinks I'm sexy. He takes great care of me emotionally and, other than the sexual-needs incompatibility, we have a stress-free marriage and a wonderful life together, so why does it hurt so deeply when he doesn't have sex with me? And why do I need so much sex to feel good about myself? (If you're wondering, I'm female, 38, and was never sexually abused.)
3 or 4 times a week? I'm sure hubby is happy.
I find it hard to believe she couldn't find a guy who wanted it more than that.
My husband and I have sex three or four times a week, and I masturbate at least twice a week, but that's not enough to keep me happy.
Then masturbate more often. Is it really that difficult?
Then masturbate more often. Is it really that difficult?
Batteries are expensive. She's gonna need one of those gas powered jobs.
Maybe we can work free gas powered dildos into the ACA?
Just buy her a steam-powered one (that's Steely Dan's namesake, btw).
I had this same thought. Masturbation is not as good, but she makes it sound like she's going at it all the time. One of my female friends goes about 5 times a day. There's plenty of room for increasing her masturbation schedule.
a female "friend", eh?
Hmm, Ted beat me to it.
I'll change my answer to SEXBOTS! but will not link to any of a number of websites with elaborate homespun dildos-attached-to-machines contraptions.
why does it hurt so deeply when he doesn't have sex with me?
Her problem is she thinks a sense of self-worth is a thing you get from other people.
This.
"she thinks a sense of self-worth is a thing you get from other people."
Don't most women? At least she also ties it to getting someone's rocks off.
Ohh, and something about a dearth of libertarian women...
If your madness has a method, this is a good one to choose.
She's a Democrat.
Yeah, it's usually the men who complain about not getting enough. If the sex is that important to you hon, you should have chosen a man who could keep up with you. Put up or divorce are the only (honorable) choices.
Sounds like someone with too much time on their hands.
She needs a polyandrous relationship!
Seriously though, is "masturbate more" not an option here?
Maybe she's no good at sex, and her husband just doesn't like getting his dick mashed sideways four times a week. He doesn't want to tell her, because she seems very sensitive. Maybe they should get a copy of the Kama Sutra and they can practice and improve.
This is also a possibility. I dated a girl like that in college. She wasn't just terrible at sex though, kissing her was like getting jackhammered in the back of my throat.
One girl I dated briefly I call fish girl because she kissed like she was goldfish, just methodologically opening and closing her mouth.
Maybe she should lose some weight.
And stopped being so fucked in the head.
Stopped or stop, whichever version of English you prefer.
Couldn't this be some sort of hormonal imbalance? It seems like if you're getting off 3+ times a week, the normal female body would be physically satisfied. I'd even hazard that the normal male body would be physically satisfied as well.
You've obviously never been with a mid 30 year old woman.
Not bragging or exaggerating but I once gave my wife 40 orgasm's in a 3 day period. I was shooting for 50 but got too tired and couldn't keep going.
At no time did she every reach a point where she was just done and ready to stop for a while
Bobby Brown, haven't you said enough about Whitney? Let her rest in peace.
Once girls get into their mid 30's, they go nuts. It is like the teenage years with guys.
That depends, if she's expecting him to do all the work after a year or two just getting a good nights sleep starts to look better and better
^THIS^
I promised myself that I'd be faithful...
I'm pretty sure you promised someone else too.
That is nothing. I had a girlfriend who did it at least once a day.
A human rights group estimates the death toll so far in Syria's civil war stands at 115,000.
And we never got to help them out with our cruise missiles.
Shut down more thoroughly: the federal government, or sloopy's week 4 picks?
Long story here: OK, so I had an employee I wanted to terminate today. I had him come to my office where I had his paycheck through the day and a cab waiting to take him home. While he surrendered his laptop and company-issued phone, he refused to surrender his company vehicle or gas card. I was pretty persistent that he had to leave them but he refused and went out, got in the truck and drove off, nearly running over my yard manager who tried to get in front of him.
I got pretty irate and called him on his personal cell phone and told him he had 5 minutes to return the truck or I was calling the police. He refused and said I could call his attorney instead. I told him I hoped his attorney was well versed in criminal defense, because that's what he was going to need if I didn't see the truck in 5 minutes.
Well, the time passed and I had no choice but to call the cops. The City of San Bernardino's Finest came out and took the statements of all parties on our end, including the address of the driver, his personal cellphone number, the vin and license plate number of the truck in addition to the make/model/color and the driver's license info of the guy that stole it.
So at the end of the statement, the cop said he wasn't going to call it in to the CHP because "it's just a plain truck with no identifying marks, so there's no reason to". He also recommended that I personally call the PD in the city where the thief lived and request that they go by (cont.)
don't leave me hanging!
Aren't trucks, like health insurance, a right?
Maybe Obama will buy the guy a truck, you old meanie.
And then?
Srsly, dude, type the whole think in a text editor or word processor then cut and paste it in comment-sized chunks.
And then the cops came by, murdered sloop's adorable baby goats, and carried off Banjos to sell into white slavery.
...carried off Banjos to sell into white slavery.
She's already in with a bunch of honky libertarians, what's different?
I thought you were SF for a second there Warty.
You'd be surprised how often I hear that when I'm out in public.
Maybe if you stopped panicking every time someone pulled out a Snickers bar it probably wouldn't happen as often.
NOOOOO FUCK CARBS
Jeez Warty what won't you fuck?
I didn't expect the second part to take as long as it did, sorry.
But seriously, give me a fucking break, dude. I'm so enraged I'm seeing tunnel-vision and am getting a numb left arm.
I thought the guy had come back with the truck and run you over.
I thought maybe the cops had shot a dog, just to be safe.
That's the other thing. He almost ran over somebody and the cop acted like it was no big deal. Didn't want to look at the tire marks where he peeled out of the yard. Didn't want to talk to any witnesses. Not a fucking thing.
Oh, but drive a car in the direction of one of his "brothers," and you are gonna face certain death, civilian!*
*By "in the direction of", I mean in the general vicinity of, possibly while being a Mexican paper delivery woman or surfer dude.
Did they kill any puppies?
Finish the fucking story man!
Finish something else, too
(cont.)...his house in a few hours to see if he took it there.
I asked if he could call the guy and try to calm him down, possibly explain the severity of what he had done and see if he could get him to come back. He said since the guy was likely already out of the city limits, he wouldn't do that. I asked if he could call the other PD where the guy lived and he said it would be up to me to do that but the warrant would be filed.
I asked him what would happen if the guy brought it back and he said he would "probably just recommend we let it go since nobody was hurt". I asked what if he didn't and he said "eventually it will turn up. The guy probably doesn't want it anyway, he just needed a way home."
I asked him for a case number...which prompted him to actually request all of the data I had already given him again and really fill out the forms for real, leaving me with a case number. IOW, he wasn't even planning on filing the report until I demanded he give me a stolen car report.
So to recap: I reported every possible bit of information on the guy and the vehicle he stole, down to where he lived and where he said he was going to drive the vehicle. The police officer refused to act on that information and only filled out a report when I requested the case number, which tells me he had no intention of doing so. And I have to personally call every jurisdiction in SoCal if I plan on them aiding in retrieving my company's stolen property.
Un-fucking-believable!
The City of San Bernardino, by the way, is under Chapter 7 bankruptcy protection. With service like this, I can't understand why people aren't clamoring to fucking move here.
Why are you still there?
Because getting a Conditional Use Permit in another municipality is turning out to be ab arduous task. Not only does my industry have a stigma attached to it of being a net-loss from a tax standpoint( many auctions are dealer-only, and those are not taxable transactions), but the equipment we sell is considered to be bad on infrastructure (due to weight) and bad for "the environment" because a lot of it is older Tier 0-powered equipment.
Never fucking mind the fact that we sell retail and those are taxable transactions, they've zoned us out of the picture, so we can't sell anywhere down here by right so we have to resort to getting a CUP.
Now, if you want a CUP, you have to do environmental impact studies, submit site plans, go through noise impact studies and a whole litany of other things. And we're in the process of doing those in Jurupa Valley (which is probably going to fall through because they'll disincorporate halfway through the process so we'll have to start all over again) and Fontana (where we're having ingress/egress issues with CalTrans).
Oh, and we've tried to move within the city of San Bernardino, but the City Attorney revoked our building permit without cause and refuses to answer any of our requests for comment. But I'm gonna get in front of the City Council next week and spill my guts.
So in answer to your question: I don't know.
Let me rephrase and recalibrate my question: why the fuck are you still in California?
Bonus: what is your brain made of that it can take this shit?
Well, there's all the equipment that's available out here due to the idiotic CARB regs in the state, and there's also the proximity to most large west coast ports. In our business, you have to do business in California. (Although we also operate in Oregon and Nevada and will operate in Arizona as soon as I can find a couple of salesmen for there.)
Bonus answer: I have no answer, actually.
Perhaps you should have told him there was shake in the truck? Then again, they'd steal the truck and your entire place of business.
You should have told him about all the dogs the guy had at home.
So what you're saying is that it would be easier to hire a private detective to track the guy and a repo guy to steal the car back. And you're surprised?
I know you didn't have a whole lot of options here, but you didn't seriously expect the cops to be of any help at all, did you?
Especially after Dunphy tipped them off never to help you.
So, I guess you're hiring then?
OK, now that's funny!
I kind of like the benefits package, a free truck for every employee.
That is a lovely parting gift.
You know, I don't know why I share anything with you assholes.
Come on, that was funny!
Alright, I'll admit it was a good one.
I hope you all had a good chuckle at my misfortune.
Look, you were expecting a government employee to do real work. That's for us private sector peasants. Have you been paying attention?
And on top of that, you probably hid your dogs before they came.
We're going to have to send you to the camps, aren't we?
You should've told the cop the guy had half a gram of weed in his pocket. They would've responded with half the cops in the county.
And the company truck would have been stolen again, I mean impounded, by the police, then tried, then sold at auction (possibly by Sloopy himself as a final irony).
cops are pretty worthless.
My friends back in OKC had their home broken into, and the thieves took their credit cards. They used them at several different stores around town. My friends offered to give the police those records so they could go to the stores to see if there was any security footage that would help them apprehend the thieves. "Oh, we don't do that." That was the detective who told them that. Seriously, what fucking good are you?
You know why people turn to vigilante justice? BECAUSE THE COPS ARE FUCKING WORTHLESS!
A couple years ago, my bank account got a small amount of money taken out of it by some reprobate who got my card. I told the police. Nothing happened, even though there was a camera there. I'm going to make a point of going back to the PD station and asking how progress is coming along on my case. I'm sure I'll be served with a smile.
You got any promising leads?
I'm really amazed that there are so many people in prison, as it seems like cops don't give a damn about just about anything. How does anyone even get caught? I guess the only people who get arrested are people who steal from or assault another cop or cop's friend/family member.
I'd be willing to say half of the people in prison are there due to the incompetence/malignancy of their defense attorney. Seeing as most stops are unconstitutional and the issue is never pushed by defense attorneys wanting to ingratiate themselves with "the system", I'd be willing to say a lot of prisoners simply don't belong behind bars.
You know what you need sloopy? A drone. With Hellfire missiles. You'll lose the truck but you'll have a drone.
You seem to be confused about what the police do. They aren't there to resolve your bullshit crime.
That's not entirely true. See, what sloopy can do is become good friends with the mayor (or other official if he's in the county's jurisdiction). Really good friends. Then, because of his friendship, he'll get actual service from the cops and others.
Just like the mob, except with worse food.
But without these heroic public servants, no one would ever be safe from thieves. Personally, I would be more concerned about the gas card. If he trades company-paid gas for cash that might have once been used in a drug-or-gray-market-cigarette transaction, your entire company could be subject to asset forfeiture.
BTW, does this mean you're hiring?
Oh dear, I hope this incident doesn't diminish your respect for the police.
Should have told the cop you might have left one of your semiautomatic weapons in the truck. Can't remember. But just wanted to warn him, just in case.
Unpossible.
Whoa, that's incredible. It's still legal to fire somebody in California? Aren't jerbs like a human right and stuff, man?
The employee probably voiced a conservative opinion at some point.
Aren't jerbs like a human right and stuff, man?
Jerbs and trucks...
Oh, and I hope you were taping the interaction with the cop, so you can publicly shame them.
[/not quite serious -- such advice would get you in serious trouble, I suppose.]
FWIW (not much), if this were FL I'd offer to get it back for you for a few hundred bucks.
We should get a bunch of well-armed reasoners to show up at the guy's house. Who's in Cali and well-armed?
Well, I am actually, but I'm not about to drive to Temecula.
And to top it all off, I had a 2:40 tee time that's fucking ruined now. So it looks like I've got to tee off at 4:00 or so, which means after the Korean women...and if I have to play behind a bunch of Korean women, I should not have access to firearms.
Dude, if you are playing behind Korean women you can hit into them. Accidentally.
I know, right? Banjos walks the course occasionally with me and she said I was being a dick when I said "oh great, a bunch of Korean women. Looks like this will be a 6 hour round." before teeing off.
She only said it that one time.
I didn't know, I DIDN'T KNOW!!!!
Won't they let you play through?
That's weird. When I accidentally tune to women's golf on TV, it's usually a Korean woman in first place.
I am, but you didn't hear that from me.
/looks around furtively/
Like anybody in Cali is going to answer that GBN. Geesh, it'd be a SWAT-o-rama out here!
Not necessary. I imagine sloop's company is smart enough to have spare keys.
If he can be found, just take it and go.
Although if he runs out of his trailer with a weapon all bets are off.
REASON POSSE..ASSEMBLE!
Form of an eagle!
Which guy?
I can see why you fired this guy.
at least it wasn't a duck!
Since IANAL, is this considered a criminal matter or a civil dispute?
The theft of property is criminal. I guess he gets a pass on the ADW charge since my yard manager was able to jump out of the way when he tore out of here.
Yes, but not all cases of disputed possession are theft. If, for example, the bank forecloses on my car loan, recovering the car is considered a civil matter.
I'd say this one is, seeing as he signed an employment agreement saying he would surrender all company property as requested.
And now that he's violating that signed agreement, do the courts consider it a crime or a civil contract dispute?
The cop I just got a call from said it is clearly criminal and that it may eventually fall under embezzlement as opposed to GTA, but that would be determined by the DA. He's ready to call in a search warrant of the guy's house since he has a tall gate and wall around his property.
All sloop wanted was his rug truck back.
So they ARE going to do something?!
A different department.
I got jack shit out of San bernardino PD...probably because I told them the guy drove off and the city line is all of 3 miles away. I call Temecula PD and give them the physical address of a possible car thief WHO IS DRIVING THE CAR HOME and they cream in their pants because they have the chance to crack a skull.*
*I told them there's no way the guy will resist or be violent and will probably surrender the car peacefully. So as far as I'm concerned, I did my job.
So is this ex-employee the type who'll find some pathetic excuse to sue? Or is he the type who'll sneak back onto the lot and sabotage equipment?
So is this ex-employee the type who'll find some pathetic excuse to sue?
Don't know. I have a witness to the entire episode though, so he's gonna have a hard time with that.
Or is he the type who'll sneak back onto the lot and sabotage equipment?
Depends on whether or not he makes bail and what advice his defense attorney gives him.
Sooo...we playing golf or what?
OK, that answered my question. Thanks.
And to be clear: I'm not asking if it SHOULD be considered theft (it clearly should). I'm asking if it IS considered theft, because I know the distinction get fuzzy in cases where the perpetrator originally came to posess the property by lawful means but then lost it at some later point.
If he drove toward a cop, it would been vehicular assault, even if the cop jumped out of the way.
So the guy wanted to live-action roleplay GTA VI - San Bernadino?
I think the amount of meth needed to make a San Bernadino version would really unbalance the action. Maybe some kind of Breaking Bad themed game?
I am willing to submit myself for this experiment for the good of humanity.
Michael Jordan says he could have beaten Lebron in his prime; says Kobe is only challenger
Michael Jordan believes he could have beaten LeBron James in a game of one-on-one when he was in his prime.
He's not sure about Kobe Bryant.
In a video promoting the "NBA 2K14" video game released Tuesday, Jordan said there's a long list of players he would've liked to have played one-on-one -- Jerry West, Elgin Baylor, Julius Erving, Carmelo Anthony, Dwyane Wade, Bryant and James, who is on the cover of this year's game.
"I don't think I would lose," Jordan, 50, says in the video, before smiling and adding, "other than to Kobe Bryant, because he steals all of my moves."
Thoughts?
It's sad to see greatness driven by ego become ego unwizened by age.
I think he's right about 1-on-1. Lebron isn't as good a ball handler as Jordan was.
http://www.latimes.com/enterta.....8730.story
The Simpsons are going to kill off (yet another) major character. I haven't seen the series in so long, I didn't even know that Mrs. Krabappel married Ned Flanders. (Yeah, you read that right.)
If the writers had any balls, they'd kill off Homer. "You won't take the hint and cancel us, Fox? Well, fuck you!"us, Fox? Well, fuck you!"
Well, that was an odd Ctrl-Z Ctrl-Y failure there.
Fox had the hare-brained scheme of having an all-Simpsons channel one time. But after that plan fell through, I can't see any reason why they should continue producing the show anymore. Maybe the 7:00 pm Sunday timeslot isn't as valuable anymore?
...Oops. That's 8:00 pm E/7:00 pm C. I'm such a Central Time Zone chauvinist.
Oh, good, another "I haven't watched the show in a decade because I know it sucks" thread. So, you know *nothing* about the show, if you would like it better now or not, but that's okay, it's dead to you, it died a long time ago, you've moved on with your life, no second chances for your media consumption.
It's a good thing for the Chicago Cubs and the (insert name of team you root for that will let you down again) that mindset is restricted to television.
Would it be pretentious to call this line of argument "anti-intellectual." It's like someone saying that they find all of Tom Clancy's post-Clear and Present Danger novels to be inferior, and another person jumping in and saying, "How dare you be so opinionated. You gave up right after The Sum of All Fears. How can you possibly say Red Rabbit sucks?!"
You know what, you don't want to watch the Simpsons, don't, I don't care. Whenever they come up here, the fact that so many people here act like it's a mark of honor. "Nobody I know watches 'The Simpsons'. Shoulda been cancelled years ago."
So...are you...joking?
Who *does* watch it?
What the fuck is a "Simpsons"?
This is...a joke, right?
I don't watch the Astros or spend any time thinking about them, other than if I happen to pass a news item about them going about my day. But I do know that they suck. And their default will always be suck until they establish a record of not sucking that lasts longer than their streak of sucking.
(insert name of team you root for that will let you down again)
Dude, that's always the Cleveland Browns.
I don't see why people demand the Simpsons be cancelled yet there are no calls for cancellation of the network news.
They should've killed him years ago.
If by "him" you mean the writer that came up with "Armin Tamzarian", then I agree.
Shows not called Captain Kangaroo or Gunsmoke must end.
For instance, I like Burn Notice, but they were running out of ideas and cancelled while still doing well. Ditto other shows that have the sense not to flog themselves to death.
Some Hollywood people get off on flogging themselves to death.
Which is the primary reason Breaking Bad ended.
Burn Notice was great in it's early seasons. I think what happened there was they were too ambitious too early, and after the awesome finale of the second season they kind of painted themselves in a corner. They survived the fourth season blues pretty well by adding Jesse, but they started to lose me at the 5th season, and lost me at the 6th. Once they started rehashing ideas and plots from the older seasons, that was it for me. Have not gotten around to the last season. They got 7 seasons out of it, so they did pretty well.
I liked the series premiere on Sunday. It was a parody of Homeland, which I haven't seen. Homer returns from a conference and won't eat pork or drink. Lisa suspects Something Happened.
Maybe they'll bring Poochie back and kill him off again.
It's been downhill since Season 7.
I liked most of Season 8. Hell, I was still hanging on with Season 9. But by Season 10, the "Behind the Music" parody officially did me in.
Behind the Laughter was the finale of the 11th season.
Yup. The Day It Became Unwatchable.
That was the 11th Season, which is why I own all of them through the 10th.
This thread is making me feel old. Stop it.
Holy crap they are still on? I have not really watched the show regularly since homerpolooza, and haven't watched it at all since the 10th season.
Venezuela has expelled three U.S. diplomats, accusing them of trying to sabotage the economy.
Those guys got off easy. They killed Chavez and had him stuffed.
Professor of "Anglo-Americans studies" asks how is the Affordable Care Act an affront to freedom?
Is it an affront to freedom to do the following things?
(a)Forbid insurance companies to exclude potential customers on the basis of medical preconditions, or to increase their premiums when they become sick?
(b)Allow parents to keep their children on their own health insurance until those children reach their 26th birthday?
(c)Set up health exchanges where Americans without employer-provided health care can obtain private health insurance at a reasonable premium?
(d)Provide subsidies to people on low incomes, to ensure that those hard-working Americans can be adequately covered?
(e)Expand Medicaid so that able-bodied adults without children earning up to 133% of the poverty level can be covered for basic medical needs?
(f)Increase the scale of access for women to preventive care without co-pays and deductibles; or
(g)Help senior citizens finance a greater part of the purchase of prescription drugs.
Yes.
I imagine that it will all be about the freedom of young adults to voluntarily non-insure. The freedom taken from them will be the freedom to go without health insurance without penalty; and yes, that will be a freedom lost.
Stupid young people need to learn to submit to society.
What kind of a social contract is that? Not a very moral one. In health care, the moral contract is between all the sick and all the healthy, with the healthy funding coverage for the sick in the certain knowledge that when they themselves become ill, they too will be covered by the healthy around them. That is a contract that genuinely extents freedom -- freedom from insecurity, freedom from worry, freedom from the inability to get the medical help when you need it, regardless of your ability in the moment to pay for it. Freedoms always balance out. Give me that freedom any day, over the freedom of the healthy to gamble on their continued health and to free-ride on the insurance policies of others.
Slavery is freedom!
Ooooh, I just had a thought. How about we keep allowing people to go without insurance, but get rid of EMTALA? That way, no free riders!
No?
You sure?
No? Ohkay.
"Yes."
He fails to see (per Bastiat) the hidden loss of freedom; the loss from those forced to give him his free shit.
Just look at the first word of his list: Forbid.
Talk about a rhetorical blunder.
Why do politicians always call low income individuals "hard working"? I get that manual labor is hard (I've done it in the past), but most low income jobs are 35-40 hours a week. That would seem like a vacation to me.
"Venezuela has expelled three U.S. diplomats, accusing them of trying to sabotage the economy."
Psssst! Hey, senor! Want some muy bueno toilet paper? I got the PRIMO!
I'm listening...
We'll win the cold war with Venezuela by showing them pictures of someones house being TP'd.
They'd just send us pictures of a house covered in crude oil.
"Republicans proposed a plan to reopen national parks, but the White House rejected it."
Obama: America's asshole.
The Constitution: America's toilet paper.
Again, they want to compare themselves to Apple --
http://goo.gl/ViD7xy
Retarded Motherfucker Likens Obamacare To Apple's iPhone: "I Don't Remember Anybody Suggesting Apple Should Stop Selling iPhones"
Why not, Microsoft?
Oh, yeah --
http://www.economist.com/blogs.....icrosoft-0
They're not even original.
http://reason.com/blog/2013/10.....e-snafus-g
It's talking points all the way down. Or up.
Police brutality in Philly...of the 4-legged variety.
Do you know who else had a German Shepard?
John Connor?
Have you seen him lately? I'm asking for a friend.
Bull Connor?
Dagwood? (I hope noone gets that joke)
I'd just like to note that the Breaking Bad finale was awesome. Also, I think I figured out Todd. He's Canadian. Think about it.
LOL
Agreed that the finale was damn good.
Why do you think Todd is Canadian?
Because he's so damn polite.
Ah, yes.
Cytotoxic is Canadian, IIRC? Polite?
Ha! I knew that was coming.
"I did it for me. I liked it."
The defining moment of Walt's character arc right there
Salon cuts to the heart of matter: Blame our antiquated Constitution for crisis
In our system of government, an opposition party doesn't have the ability to pass legislation, but it has the ability to massively screw things up. It would be strange if legislators didn't exercise that power in order to maximize their chances of either winning legislative concessions or hurting the current ruling party politically. Furthermore, our electoral system means that most House members are insulated from national attitudes about their actions, and, indeed, many Republicans members would be punished by their constituents ? especially the ones who vote in primaries, the only elections that matter in many House districts ? if they didn't exercise their power to screw things up.
Yes, we are a Republic.
These people represent very white, very conservative districts. Partisan primaries and first-past-the-post voting provide even more incentive to be as far to the right as possible. How much can we blame this "minority of a minority" for acting according to the probable wishes of their constituents? Shouldn't we actually be more upset about a system of government that gives 80 people representing 18 percent of the population the ability to drag the United States to the edge of national default?
No, we are a Republic.
Boy, has this century been marked by a lot of unmasking, or what? It's like Scooby-Do writ large.
Speaking of which, my (and I am so embarrassed by this) Dem sister sent me this today:
Fred: Well officers, it was quite a mystery why the ol' Capitol Building was haunted. Everyone kept hearing strange noises from inside while no bills were being passed, so we had to investigate.
Daphne: Yeah, and it was weird too, it would start at 2 pm instead of 9 am, and for some weird reason, money kept being paid to the congressmen and women's bank accounts when no work was getting done.
Velma: That's right, and if no budget was passed by midnight, no money could be allocated to the government offices or programs. But that was when we realized who it really was haunting the Capitol building.
Fred: At first we thought it was the Senate, for not passing any bills.
Velma: But then we realized that the bills they were rejecting all were trying to alter the Affordable Healthcare Act.
Shaggy: Like, zoinks! That's the plan that would give, like, first world healthcare coverage to all Americans.
Velma: That's right! We didn't figure it out until Scoob here stumbled onto the bill wording.
Scooby: Rhee-hee-hee.
Shaggy: Then, like, who's to blame?
Fred: Well, we realized that the ones holding the government budget hostage were none other than the House of Representatives, led by...
pulls off mask
All: Old man Boehner!
Boehner: Grr.
Fred: You see, if the House didn't send a bill that didn't affect the Affordable Healthcare Act, the Senate would have no choice but to reject it, so he kept sending bills that would alter it until they would give up, holding the U.S. Government hostage.
Velma: That's right, but he didn't realize that the Democratically controlled Senate wouldn't allow the House to damage what the Democratic party has worked so hard to make.
Shaggy: Wow, looks like he didn't, amend his plan!
laughter
Boehner: Grr. And I would have gotten away with it too, if it weren't for you meddling kids!
laughter
Scooby: Scooby-Dooby-Dooooo!
Only the dead can know peace from this evil.
Shaggy, like, you better lay off the weed, man. You mean the plan that would FORCE everyone to purchase (soon to be third)world healthcare coverage?
You see, if the House didn't send a bill that didn't affect the Affordable Healthcare Act, the Senate would have no choice but to reject it
How can they reject something they didn't send?
We're a year out from an election that, in a parliamentary democracy, would've easily granted one party control of the government.
This is happening because our wise and noble founders devised a purposefully undemocratic federal government, in part because not many of them were particularly fond of the notion of democracy and in part because the ones who were at least a bit pro-democracy were forced to compromise with vile slave interests. We've since declared these creaky compromises to be evidence of political genius ? an elegant separation of powers! checks and balances! ? but the nearly 100 percent failure rate for other countries with true "Presidential systems" is a hint that it's a mess. Meanwhile, our Constitution's international influence has plummeted in recent decades. Its single best feature ? the Bill of Rights ? now looks stingy compared to the lists of positive enumerated rights in other nations' constitutions.
Jesus Christ, does he honestly think the last 100 years of world history has shown the superiority of parliamentary systems and one-party autocracies?
Yes, yes he does. As long as The Right People are in charge.
THAT'S THE JOKE
That article is the perfect mix of childish temper tantrum and scary authoritarianism to kick off the month of October! Happy Halloween, folks!
He knows his party would be the one in charge and he'd be one of the privileged, they'd get everything they ever wanted and it would all work out to utopia, guaranteed*.
*Guarantee is not guaranteed.
We're a year out from an election that, in a parliamentary democracy, would've easily granted one party control of the government.
And based on the current numbers that party would be the GOP.
I wonder if this person realizes that if the US were a unicamerial parlementary democracy that Obamacare would have been repealed two years ago by prime miniser boehner.
From spending 2.1 trillion going up to 3.7 trillion in a decade and holding there, with a racked up debt of 17 trillion with the majority holder of it being the Fed Reserve to keep the interests rate from ever reflecting market demand. Somehow, that never alarms them quite as much as the fact there exist an opposition to just going along with the diarrhea flow of excess government.
80 people representing 18 percent of the population
18%? Please.
Come on. Congress is 535 people that represent, at most, 25% of the population.
Has there ever been a more impudent, childish President than the one we have today? This man has refused over and over throughout his presidency to ever negotiate with the other side. It's always "you'll do what I say, and you'll like it." EVERY FUCKING TIME. If the other side resists, he throws a damned temper tantrum.
Problem is, the idiots in the GOP take it, buckle under pressure, and still get blamed for everything.
and still get blamed for everything.
Which is why they should go to the mat on this!
And if they don't buckle under, SuderWelch blames them.
"Temper tantrum" has been applied thousands of times recently - to the GOP Tea Party - who are crying until they get their way.
http://preview.tinyurl.com/ldnyl36
Google News confirms. Nice projection though,
Once again, resident retard not only makes a post devoid of cogency but posts a link to nothing. Not even SF nothing just...random nothing.
I'd hate being a politician, but for one moment - that moment when I no longer cared about being re-elected, and could go off on everyone, including President Panties-in-a-twist.
Celebrate the glorious government shutdown by participating in this year's baby naming auction. All proceeds go to a libertarian charity/cause of the winner's choosing.
If I weren't a poor college graduate I would bid on Liberty Ordeth.
Name him Todd.
The real reason that the exchanges are crappy: Republican hackers.
I thought Republicans were all dumb, racist rednecks. Surely such people couldn't hack the super-sophisticated work of the enlightened left.
The glorious plans of the enlightened left are always thwarted by their opposition. It...it's almost as if they weren't enlightened enough to account for that in their glorious plans.
KOCH
Say, are they dumb rednecks, too?
Outsourced the attacks to China. Those damn Republicans, always sending jobs overseas!
Hey don't scoff. The only thing more dangerous than redneck engineering is hippie engineering.
I'm guessing they are running this on something almost* amateurish like Ruby on Rails that can't handle the large volume.
* It was a pretty good solution back in 2005-07, not now though.
http://www.wired.com/wiredente.....-java/all/
Inspired marketing: Film poster for 'Diana' biopic placed in French tunnel where she died
A poster advertising the new 'Diana' film has sparked outrage after it was installed on the exact spot where the princess died 16 years ago.
The imposing 6x4ft film hoarding, showing star Naomi Watts in character as Diana, Princess Of Wales, appeared on a billboard advertising sign next to the Pont de l'Alma in Paris over the weekend.
Yards away stands the iconic gold-leafed Flame of Liberty which became her unofficial memorial in the wake of her death on which 'Diana pilgrims' continue to scrawl messages in her memory.
And today one of the princess' closest friends reacted with fury, branding it a 'shameless and despicable attempt to promote a movie that should never have been made'.
The candle burned out long ago, the weird fixation never will.
Sorry she died and everything, but she was an ex-princess, except for some nice technical parting gifts she got from the royal family. Which makes it all the weirder.
Her funeral was actually one of my earliest memories of watching something on TV.
But I still don't understand the fixation with her or any type of royalty.
If Fergie dies in a car accident, will everyone freak out, too? She's just a duchess.
Earliest TV memories. Davy Crockett scene with X shaped crucifixes up on a hill, strippers on Donahue, post Tet coverage of the Vietnam War, like an anniversary thing on it, and a few years later, the Watergate hearings, and the evacuation of troops from Saigon -- asking dad why they were throwing planes overboard to make room for people. Planes were cooler than people to me then.
Dark Shadows, some Superman cartoon series, Vietnam news, Scooby-Do, Star Trek.
Crusader Rabbit, Beanie and Cecil, Cisco Kid and Zorro.
Now get off my lawn.
Yeah, Star Trek definitely in there. The original was dad's favorite show. Reruns came on at 7 PM Weekdays, Suppertime.
Invaders, that was another one that left an impression.
Oh, and the Moon landings.
That's the first thing I remember on TV -- the first moon landing.
Invaders, that was another one that left an impression.
Oh, fuck yeah. I had forgotten about that show. Scared the shit out of me. Another early tee-vee memory are the ball twins: Cannonball and Fireball XL5. Speed Racer, Eighth Man, Astro Boy and Prince Planet on the anime side.
The trifecta of the shit was Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea, Time Tunnel and Lost in Space. Throw in Land of the Giants in there somewhere.
Tom and Jerry at my grandparents' house, Lawrence Welk at the same house and The Brady Bunch reruns in syndication.
I even remember the gold velour ottoman I used to sit on the corner of while sitting in the grandparents' house and their dog "Trouble" going from kid to kid to get petted while my grandfather laughed with his "robot" (he had a stoma resulting from throat surgery).
Thanks, whoever brought this up. You just gave me a great memory today. Seriously.
Fawlty Towers.
Davy Crockett scene with X shaped crucifixes up on a hill,
Davy Crockett was in Planet Of The Apes?
Nope, but similar scene though. In black and white, very eerily done.
I fucking hate British royalty, and I can't understand why so many Americans are obsessed with it. I wish to god the 40 to 70 year-olds that get all dewey-eyed when they remember their precious Princess would either move to the fucking UK, or die.
I would guess that American women have princess fantasies.
I thought American women were strong, "can do" type gals who can handle any job a man can, but with more understanding and a little panache. You're telling me that they are sentimental daydreamers who longs for the chivalrous trappings of the royal court?
It's not their fault. They were raised on Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty and all that.
I hated that scene they kicked off the Olympics with where the Queen and 007 take off in a plane, and all of those goofy face chummy people, Brits, waving their pudgy little hands at the Queen as she passed by. Aigh, wanted to rape the smiles off of all of their faces. It was all I could bear before switching it off. Spared me the DHS dance I heard about later.
Helicopter -- still thinking of those beautiful f-4s they sacrificed to make room for passengers on the way out of Saigon. It was my silencing of the lambs.
A high school buddy (two years ahead of me) was a door gunner on one of those Huey's and helped pitch them off the deck after the last flight.
I was 16 and waiting a few months to turn 17 so I could enlist.
Why don't people use her death to promote wearing seat belts in limos and making sure the chauffeur isn't driving under the influence?
But no, just weeping, lots and lots of weeping.
The candle burned out long ago, the weird fixation never will.
+1 Elton John
Lizzie Littlefeather, doing her thing:
Go ahead, see how long you can watch. I dare you.
I tried, and just seeing her face couldn't bring myself to click the start button.
So, does it induce vomiting faster than ipecac?
Government shutdown. Women hit hardest!!!
Hmm, it's like we both showed up at a party wearing a very similar, but not the same, outfit.
Do you think its possible that all of the "everything hurts women" line that comes out all the time will have the effect of driving otherwise dem inclined men to the GOP?
first comment:
Beautiful.
And another:
There better be swelling and bruising then.
Government shuts down; Women hit Hardest
Ladies who don't want to get the flu
The butt-clowns whose endless grandstanding caused the shutdown will still get paid because they are "essential government employees" (related: the word "essential," like the words "awesome" and "curvy," means nothing now; its definition has been obliterated by overuse). But you know who won't get paid? The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention's influenza program.
That means no strategic work to be done on how flu vaccines should be distributed. No research into what strains are going to be passed around your kid's kindergarten class like a meme that makes your head feel like it's full of pus.
Federally employed ladies
The federal civilian workforce is 57% male ,but that doesn't mean ladies won't be screwed here, too; for federal female employees (as for most Americans), missing one paycheck is a big deal.
But this time it might be different, as this time we have a Tea Party and the Tea Party is made up of people who think that people should just use Jesus to fix everything. Sick kid? Needs Jesus! Out of work? Try some Jesus! Disabled? Have you considered Jesus? These people use Jesus like an old country grandma uses olive oil. Unfortunately, prayers and hopeful America montages don't have enough calories to support a child's successful physical development.
Every store with a pharmacy in it around here has a "FLU VACCINE HERE" sign. What are they inoculating against if not the flu?
Love this. If she reached any harder, she'd be able to felate herself.
I'll agree the tea party definitely became a lot worse than its original gang, but to this guy they are all Socons now. I guess the whole thing about lowering taxes and making government smaller was just a front for imposing Christian religion? Or is the intolerant Left just making assumptions again?
They don't know what the fuck is up and where the Hell is down. They can be taught to be aggressive and bark at a group of people if an authority figure tells them to though.
Whaddya know. The shutdown HAS led to roving biker gangs controlling our streets. WHO RUNS BARTERTOWN?
http://nypost.com/2013/10/01/b.....e-highway/
This story pisses me off. He should've smashed those fucks into the guard rails.
Apparently he hit one of them (paralyzed him even) when they first started to surround him, which just made them angrier...
When you watch the video, it's pretty obvious the guy that first got hit was trying to provoke a confrontation--he brake-checks while looking back at the vehicle.
These assholes need to be run off the road at every opportunity. They slow up traffic to do stupid-ass bike tricks on their crotch rockets. And they terrorized one guy who happened to spoil their feels. One of them is in a coma and I hope he stays that way.
Except that was a few days before the shutdown. And notice the cops never showed up to help.
I was about to ask why the guy didn't drive straight to a police station.
Ahem, what?
Well why not? Everything's been in great in Russia since!
So, let me see if I get this right: Obama should have the army lob some shells at Congress?
Man, masks coming off everywhere.
It's difficult to interpret it any other way, isn't it?
It's impossible to read it any other way. Jesus.
You guys don't understand. They don't want to shoot people who disagree with them. It's just that they have to. It's in the social contract.
We are so going into special camps, aren't we?
I don't think so. When it comes time to start rounding us up, we're going to be the most difficult bunch to get.
Well, yes, I expect I'll be shot while attempting to escape, however this plays out.
Oh come on it'll be like summer camp. You'll like it.
Oh come on it'll be like summer camp. You'll like it.
I better get Camp Krusty.
I have the escape all planned out. All we have to do is show up at Sloopy's business in San Bernardino. He has heavy equipment there we could "borrow" and apparently gate security is terrible.
Will the reeducation camps be in California, then? That's a relief. I had visions of being locked up in some swamp, with pythons, malaria, and stuff.
I was thinking of escaping before we get sent to the camps.
All we have to do is show up at Sloopy's business in San Bernardino
Hmm, stay in a reeducation camp or go to San Bernadino...I'm going to have to weigh my options here.
With that attitude you are. Me, my mouth is going to get me shot in the face with extreme prejudice.
There's Killaz! Better put him down, for his own good, before he goes on the run. Sorry it's gotta be this way, boy, but you just wouldn't give us all your shit willingly.
You see, my very name is a warning. Its insurance to make sure I don't wind up in no camp. After reading Night, brrr, don't wanna wind up like a cannibal like that guy did.
If we wanted to be super-charitable, we could suppose that maybe what TNR is saying is that Yeltsin took the wrong approach, and by not, uh, having the military shell the capital building, Obama is taking the statesmanlike high-road...maybe?
No, I don't think there's a charitable reading here. Curious to see how they walk this one back. Probably just call it a "joke." "We were just kidding! What's wrong with you people? Can't you take a joke? I wish Obama would shoot everyone who can't take a joke!"
I always forget The New Republic when I'm looking for foot-stomping. That is a mistake.
One question. Weren't most Americans covered by health insurance in the first place? Why does this new law reduce that number to less than ten percent of the total population? Is there some plan to only allow party members to have access to healthcare?
There's no time for editing for clarity, man! THIS IS A CRISIS!
Someone mentioned this elsewhere, but it bears repeating: Those millions who supposedly had no coverage or ability to get it? We've heard the last of them, and not because they're actually going to get coverage.
Listen, you have to crack a few eggs to build a humongous, incredibly complicated, impossible-to-eat omelet that you won't know tastes good or not until you've made it.
I wonder if I could get protection by signing on to one of those death panels? Think that would pay well? Do they get robes?
It's october again. Which means it's time for the dreaded "cultural approbation" monster to rear it's ugly head.
HA!
Wait, did I miss something? Are people tearing the flesh off of fat people to wear as suits ala Silence of the Lambs now?
A fat suit with the coverage of a tank top. Seriously.
Haven't you seen it on TV?
It's the sequester all over again!
Huh, "Forging Justice." Just right, they are forging justice. Just not with the meaning of the word "forging" that they probably like to think.
also this:
What you did there? You know, pretending that it's only white people who are allowed to dress up for Saint Patrick's day or wear a celtic cross? You are a disingenuous prat.
Appropriation, Coeus. That other word means approval.
My bad. spellchecked and didn't look too closely. Still forget I have a preview button now.
Feminist government shutdown open thread:
Here ze is again:
What a waste of a human being. She accepts charity and then spits in their face. Entitled scum.
We also would have accepted "feminist". Basically the same thing.
I dunno bout you, but the sun dint rise here todays. And the critters been actin all weird and like. Fire been comin out yonder mountin, too.
Dis here gubmint shutdown be destroying the whole damned world! Dats what.
At least you won't have to worry about the revenuers so much. Oh wait, they're not termed "non-essential".
You mean they got rid of the trapezoid?
That would be good news.
The Brodeur rule will not be revoked until Brodeur is retired.
Related: The Devils are going to win a ton of 2-1 games this year and every sportswriter is going to ignorantly bitch about how "they're back to their trapping ways" and ruining hockey. Unless DeBoer screws it up by giving Proven Veterans Brodeur, Anton Volchenkov, and Stephen Gionta anything more than token time they're going to the playoffs and it's going to make the bi-national hockey media's collective head explode.
Can't wait; no 30 goal scorers and home ice in the first round - feels like the late 90's. Bring on the hate.
They won't even make payroll.
You should probably read the news more often. Ownership is no longer an issue.