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Obama Says Trayvon Martin Could Have Been Him Years Ago, Pot Pipe Found in Kids Meal, Tumblr Makes Sex-Oriented Blogs Unsearchable: P.M. Links

Matthew Feeney | 7.19.2013 4:30 PM

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Large image on homepages | White House Photo by David Lienemann/wikimedia
(White House Photo by David Lienemann/wikimedia)
Credit: Eric Guo/wikimedia
  • Jesse Jackson has suggested boycotting Florida in the wake of the George Zimmerman verdict. In other Zimmerman-related news, Obama has said that "Trayvon Martin could have been me 35 years ago."  
  • A marijuana pipe has been found in a four-year-old's Burger King Kids Meal…I knew I'd left that somewhere.
  • Tumblr has rendered its sexually oriented blogs unsearchable, which will affect about 10 percent of content.
  • Sens. Chuck Schumer (D-N.Y.) and Lindsey Graham (R-S.C.) have suggested moving the venue of the next G20 summit, scheduled to take place in St. Petersburg, if Russian authorities continue to allow Edward Snowden to remain in Russia. Obama's visit to Moscow has been postponed because of the ongoing Snowden saga.
  • A pharmaceutical company is betting on medical marijuana being used in treatments for diabetes, epilepsy, and colitis.
  • Detroit billionaire Dan Gilbert has said that parts of The Motor City need to be torn down and built up again.

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NEXT: Obama Says 'Stand Your Ground' Laws Encourage Violence

Matthew Feeney is a policy analyst at the Cato Institute.

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  1. Fist of Etiquette   12 years ago

    ...Obama has said that "Trayvon Martin could have been me 35 years ago."

    President Dad can't imagine anyone stalking choom gangs, besides of course his federal drug enforcement agents.

    1. Raven Nation   12 years ago

      Hmm, so if Obama were Trayvon, does that mean that Obama would be, um,...

      *backs out of room without finishing that thought but think of parrots & Monty Python...*

      1. JW   12 years ago

        I had the same thought, but without the parrots.

        1. Longtorso, Johnny   12 years ago

          Weekend at Obama's?

        2. Night Elf Mohawk   12 years ago

          It seems like a common sentiment.

        3. Raven Nation   12 years ago

          Well, that gives me some hope: maybe the drones will get you while I go to Iceland.

          1. JW   12 years ago

            What? You were supposed to be *my* diversion!

            1. Raven Nation   12 years ago

              I'm running off a semi-public wifi server in a state other than the one in which I live in. The computer I'm on is one of hundreds registered to my employer (also in the other state). I'm also 3 hours from an international airport and the road there winds mostly through mountains which would be hard to get a drone into.

              I'll drink a Brennivin in your memory.

              1. JW   12 years ago

                "He's got a two day head start on you, which is more than he needs. Raven's got friends in every town and village from here to the Sudan, he speaks a dozen languages, knows every local custom, he'll blend in, disappear, you'll never see him again. With any luck, he's got the grail already."

                1. Rasilio   12 years ago

                  "He's got a two day head start on you, which is more than he needs. Raven's got friends in every town and village from here to the Sudan, he speaks a dozen languages, knows every local custom, he'll blend in, disappear, you'll never see him again. With any luck, he's got the grail Monicle already."

                  FIFY

                  1. Marshall Gill   12 years ago

                    Turn in your decoder ring! A True Libertarian knows how to spell monocle!

                2. Raven Nation   12 years ago

                  So, basically, I'm about to be captured by Nazis?

      2. Killazontherun   12 years ago

        The DEA murdered Mexicans riding in the back of a truck near the Mexico-Texas border, did Obama give a news conference about that? No, he just let the news of the event die down, and no one in the media expected a response out of him. He only makes a grab at the moral authority of the bully pulpit when it is politically convenient for him, not when he could actually accomplish something with it.

    2. DJF   12 years ago

      So 35 years ago Obama would have attacked a "Creepy Ass White Cracker" if he thought he was following him?

      1. Jerry on the boat   12 years ago

        He would be stealing skittles.

        1. Enough About Palin   12 years ago

          "skittles"

          The body of Trayvon.

      2. gaijin   12 years ago

        So I guess Charles Barkley won;t be invited to the WH anytime soon:

        Link

    3. Dibbler   12 years ago

      NSA and IRS scandals? Nobody has time for that when RACISTS!!!

      1. Killazontherun   12 years ago

        Progtards: Hey, we have the upper hand in the national dialog again, yay!

    4. Skip   12 years ago

      If Obama ran away from his rich Bank VP grandmother and went to live in the hood, he would be EXACTLY like Trayvon!

      1. AlmightyJB   12 years ago

        Yeah, he's always trying to up his cred. Obama's just a little bitch.

  2. A Serious Man   12 years ago

    Detroit billionaire Dan Gilbert has said that parts of The Motor City need to be torn down and built up again.

    I'd buy that for a dollar!

    1. DJF   12 years ago

      Does he also plan on replacing the people?

      1. Bobarian   12 years ago

        Robo-People

        Brought to you by OCP.

    2. C. Anacreon   12 years ago

      I'd buy that for a dollar!

      Very clever Robocop-Detroit reference!

      1. Warrren   12 years ago

        He has OCP.

      2. mr lizard   12 years ago

        Don't forget: "It can't rain forever..."

      3. Gorilla tactics   12 years ago

        RICHES...LEAVE!!!

        1. Warrren   12 years ago

          Detroit has 99 problems and the rich ain't one!

    3. LarryA   12 years ago

      [Detroit billionaire Dan Gilbert has said that parts of The Motor City need to be torn down and built up again.]

      I'll agree to the first part. Unfortunately the second part is sure to involve government subsidies.

  3. Fist of Etiquette   12 years ago

    A marijuana pipe has been found in a four-year-old's Burger King Kids Meal...

    A stoner working at Mickey Dee's? Well I never.

    1. A Serious Man   12 years ago

      Burger King, Fist. You're stoned, aren't you?

    2. DJF   12 years ago

      So are they complaining or did they want to win the entire matching set of pipes?

      1. Fist of Etiquette   12 years ago

        They always withhold one model just to make it valuable.

        1. Bobarian   12 years ago

          I think the sponge-bob version is the rare one. All I ever seem to get is that fuckin Dora one.

          1. Warrren   12 years ago

            Bogarter no bogarting!

            1. Rasilio   12 years ago

              ROTFL I've never smoked pot but that there is funny

  4. The DerpRider   12 years ago

    I'm no lawyer, but this judge sounds insane.

    "It's cheating, sir, and it's cheating good people who work," the judge told assistant Attorney General Brian Devlin. "It's also not honoring the (United States) president, who took (Detroit's auto companies) out of bankruptcy."

    Aquilina said she would make sure President Obama got a copy of her order.

    From The Detroit News: http://www.detroitnews.com/art.....z2ZWdtEukT

    1. Episiarch   12 years ago

      She sounds like your typical Obama asskisser to me.

      1. C. Anacreon   12 years ago

        How can anyone take her seriously with that hair? Whatever happened to judges looking distinguished?

    2. SweatingGin   12 years ago

      Free Press version of the story has this:

      She also ordered that a copy of her declaratory judgment be sent to President Barack Obama, saying he "bailed out Detroit" and may want to look into the pension issue.

      1. Almanian!   12 years ago

        Detroit - Where The Derp NEVER Stops!

      2. The DerpRider   12 years ago

        Awesome. So she is delusional.

      3. PH2050   12 years ago

        "The judge said state law guards against retirement benefits being "diminished," but there will be no such protection in federal bankruptcy court."

        Sorry, I don't feel bad for people with near-concrete job security also setting themselves up with cushy pension arrangements at the cost of the taxpayer.

    3. Apatheist ?_??   12 years ago

      The fuck? I know we have problems with elected judges but none of ones here in Harris County would be dumb enough to say something like that out loud, even if they were thinking it.

    4. Marty Feldman's Eyes   12 years ago

      That is extraordinarily blatant ass kissing for a promotion. Nice way to get on the radar for a federal seat.

    5. Raven Nation   12 years ago

      I'm not a lawyer or a financial guy, but isn't the whole point of bankruptcy to deal with exactly this kind of situation. If so, does that mean following the law is now cheating?

      She spent 20 years in JAG before first election in 2004.

      http://www.lansingstatejournal.....ck_check=1

      1. JW   12 years ago

        It's the GM/Chrysler rule: debtors can go pound sand. The Unions get first crack.

    6. LynchPin1477   12 years ago

      Why the hell is "honoring" the president and his feelings relevant at all in a court of law?

      1. Generic Stranger   12 years ago

        See Raven Nation's post. She probably forgot that the president is no longer her CIC.

      2. MJGreen   12 years ago

        "I'm throwing this case out for insufficiently honoring our President."

    7. VG Zaytsev   12 years ago

      "It's also not honoring the (United States) president, who took (Detroit's auto companies) out of bankruptcy."

      What
      The
      Fuck

  5. Longtorso, Johnny   12 years ago

    Top Ten Most Disturbing Band Fan Fiction Stories
    ...For the uninitiated, fan fiction is genre of writing popular on the internet where already existing characters (usually from science fiction TV shows) are used in original storylines and settings, usually involving lots of poorly written gay sex. For the initiated, I'm sure a shiver has just gone down your spine. Fan fiction writers are usually typified as being only slightly above furries when it comes to the dregs of the internet, as they pour out the emotions that they keep so tightly hidden in the midst of their psyche onto the blank canvas that is their favourite TV show, movie, or, in these cases, band. You could argue we all, as music fans, do this: after all, haven't we all been convinced at one point or another that a certain troubadour is "singing my life with his words"? It's a fair argument, but one that gets undermined by the simple fact that the majority of us don't write incest fan fictions about Good Charlotte, so we win. ...

    ...Adelaide's attention to detail is to be admired as much as her choice of protagonists is to be vilified. She has woven a deeply unpleasant, creepy to the point of being stalkertastic tale of Bryan Adams rekindling his lustful feelings towards his now-married guitarist. ...

    1. Longtorso, Johnny   12 years ago

      ...A clever riposte and play on the homophobia inherent in so much urban music, or just the most horrific display of black-on-black pounding since the Benn/McClellan fight? Probably the latter....

      ...Apparently fifth in a series of celebrity footplay stories. Others in the series include a hotel rendezvous between P Diddy and Usher (Sean obviously having gotten over Mr Raymond's snub of his earlier party), and Fred Durst, Redman, and Method Man (he gets around) going over each others tootsies. ...

      ...The window if closes, I almost is alliviated. But then the door if opens brusquely. The shouts are deafening, I can have certainty of that I am the only one of the 45 people in this cell that this not crying or crying out. Latch my eyes not to see the children, not to find its eyes desesperan?osos, but I am forced to look at again for the door that finished of if opening: for it General Bennington enters and starts to cry out energicamente so that all keep silent....

      1. Killazontherun   12 years ago

        For the initiated, I'm sure a shiver has just gone down your spine. Fan fiction writers are usually typified as being only slightly above furries when it comes to the dregs of the internet, as they pour out the emotions that they keep so tightly hidden in the midst of their psyche onto the blank canvas that is their favourite TV show, movie, or, in these cases, band.

        A case where the one doing the mocking is telling more about his self than he is doing for the subject of his scorn. Do you need a daily affirmation, buddy?

    2. Ted S.   12 years ago

      No worse than SugarFree's stories.

      1. Longtorso, Johnny   12 years ago

        ...OK, so you find Jack White attractive. That's? well, not really understandable, but we'll let it pass. And you have similar attractions to Asperger's posterboy Rivers Cuomo. He's motherable, I can sort of see the appeal. And you want them to have lots and lots and lots of gay sex. Well, this is how these things tend to end, and far be it from me to encourage deviation from the canon. But how can you, the fan fiction writer, bring these two disparate musical icons together? ...

        1. Longtorso, Johnny   12 years ago

          ...This is at number one despite, or because, it's written in Portuguese. It's at number one because the summary reads as follows:

          World War Two. Brad and Rob are jews and this pain seems more than they can support.The devil general Bennington can becomes their lifes a hell. How can Mike, a japanese private, Phe, and Alex, the Chester's sister, change the Rob and Brad's destiny?

          It's at number one because "The devil general Bennington can becomes their lifes a hell" is my favourite sentence in the history of the written word. ...

          1. Almanian!   12 years ago

            Me love you long time

            1. Longtorso, Johnny   12 years ago

              Almanian!, it's amazing what gems you find when you enter "juggalo slashfic" into Google. And what govt lists you wind up on.....

              1. Almanian!   12 years ago

                Hah! You're not gonna fool me into doing that Johnny! Or...should I say....SUGARFREE!

                1. Longtorso, Johnny   12 years ago

                  Hey, uncool. My links work.

                  1. Almanian!   12 years ago

                    Tallest midget - WHATEV

      2. PH2050   12 years ago

        I just found that site earlier this week.

        Hourly viewings of the Eye Bleach website are not helping.

    3. Brett L   12 years ago

      Somewhat related.

    4. Not an Economist   12 years ago

      Just for the record, most fan fiction does not include gay sex, poorly written or not.

      I've read a lot of fan fiction and gay sex is rare.

  6. A Serious Man   12 years ago

    A marijuana pipe has been found in a four-year-old's Burger King Kids Meal...I knew I'd left that somewhere.

    Have you ever had a Burger King Kids Meal...on weed?

    1. HellsBells   12 years ago

      That's the only way they're edible.

  7. Archduke Trousersenthusiast   12 years ago

    Star Wars home of Anakin Skywalker threatened by dune.

    1. Warrren   12 years ago

      Quick! Find someone who cares!

    2. A Serious Man   12 years ago

      I'd better go to Toschi Station to pick up some power converters.

      1. rts   12 years ago

        Oh yeah

    3. hamilton   12 years ago

      Wait, Arrakis is invading Tatooine?

      1. Warrren   12 years ago

        Why would somebody invade the midget from Fantasy Island?

        1. hamilton   12 years ago

          Wait, there were midgets on the SS Minnow with Gilligan?

          1. Warrren   12 years ago

            Hold on, what did Vince Gilligan have to do with the Titanic?

            1. Joe M   12 years ago

              I thought that was Harry Hamlin.

              1. Warrren   12 years ago

                The Pied Piper?

    4. JW   12 years ago

      The buildings of the fictional city Mos Espa featured in The Phantom Menace, "Episode I" of the Jedi saga.

      How can it bury something that never existed?

      1. Brett L   12 years ago

        It was a fanfic tribute movie.

    5. Apatheist ?_??   12 years ago

      That's no dune.

    6. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

      At last, Frank Herbert gets his revenge.

  8. Fist of Etiquette   12 years ago

    ...suggested moving the venue of the next G20 summit, scheduled to take place in St. Petersburg, if Russian authorities continue to allow Edward Snowden to remain in Russia.

    We can't boycott! Our boys have to beat the Soviet hockey team for the gold.

    1. Ted S.   12 years ago

      Fuck you, Senators Schumer and Graham.

      That is all.

      1. Almanian!   12 years ago

        I approve this message

  9. Johnson   12 years ago

    Good article. As Emily stated, my friends mother consumes an enormous amount of human faeces. She uses it as the filling in home-made oreo cookies. You can also do this from your laptop at home, making up to $10,000 per month.

    http://www.workfromhomesolutions.com

    1. Longtorso, Johnny   12 years ago

      Do you have a newsletter I can subscribe to?

      1. General Butt Naked   12 years ago

        Click the link, Johnny.

        1. Longtorso, Johnny   12 years ago

          I dunno.....is it better or worse than HuffPo comments....?

          1. General Butt Naked   12 years ago

            It'll infect your computer, steal your credit card info, and send kiddie porn to all your email contacts...

            In other words, not as bad as HuffPo comments.

            1. PapayaSF   12 years ago

              +1

            2. Marshall Gill   12 years ago

              It'll infect your computer, steal your credit card info, and send kiddie porn to all your email contacts...

              Well played, Sir!

    2. alan_s   12 years ago

      Receives suspicious glances from people at work due to suppressed laughter.

    3. Ted S.   12 years ago

      Perhaps Emily's friend's mother can be one of my pallbearers so she can let me down one last time.

      1. hamilton   12 years ago

        I'm beginning to yearn for the days of the artisinal mayonnaise threads now.

        1. Warrren   12 years ago

          I have some stuff that looks like mayo. Small batch as well.

          1. hamilton   12 years ago

            As long as you're uncircumsized.

            1. Almanian!   12 years ago

              Oh boy - here we go....

            2. Warrren   12 years ago

              Damn. My foreskin was aborted.

      2. Longtorso, Johnny   12 years ago

        Wasn't she one of the Golden Girls?

        1. Almanian!   12 years ago

          No, that was Bee! But the thing on Bee's back is BAD! Fah must stop Bee! Fah stop Bee now! Thing on Bee's back is BAD! FAH STOP BEE!

          /Dolphin Pride

          1. Warrren   12 years ago

            Aunt Bee once imagined Barney Fife naked.

            1. Almanian!   12 years ago

              I told you Fah neeed to stop Bee

  10. Fist of Etiquette   12 years ago

    Jesse Jackson has suggested boycotting Florida in the wake of the George Zimmerman verdict.

    The snow birds have no problem with this.

    1. Episiarch   12 years ago

      Isn't collective "punishment" grand? Six women came to a conclusion he didn't like, so his answer is to try and hurt everyone in Florida by not giving them tourist dollars. Collectivists are total and abject scum.

      1. Mad Scientist   12 years ago

        And why boycott Florida? The shooting happened in Sanford, so why not boycott the city? Or maybe whatever county Sanford is in? No, no, better boycott all of Florida since Martin's death is clearly the fault of every Floridian. Hell, even better, boycott the whole south.

        1. Episiarch   12 years ago

          Well, they were all women! Boycott women! Like Hugh does!

          1. Marshall Gill   12 years ago

            To be honest, it is women that boycott Hugh.

        2. Fist of Etiquette   12 years ago

          The state produced the laws that allowed a Zimmerman to stand his ground.

          1. gaijin   12 years ago

            he laws that allowed a Zimmerman to stand his ground.

            Which I heard President Zero reference today in his 'I am Trayvon speech.' So the idea will continue to be pushed that SYG laws are roots of evil...even though it was not relevant in this case?

            1. Killazontherun   12 years ago

              The national disgrace that is this president, now that is some collective guilt I want an answer for.

        3. mad libertarian guy   12 years ago

          I would hail him as a hero if he could successfully convince progs to boycott Florida and other SYG states. I'd even seriously consider moving back.

          1. gaijin   12 years ago

            If only they would leave COlorado...I miss having that state on my list of places to live.

        4. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

          Boycott America.

      2. JD the elder   12 years ago

        I never quite understood this sort of tactic, outside of a few cases of grossly abusive official policy. I mean, are we supposed to boycott everyone who has views we don't like? Seems like we'd be dividing ourselves into small and exclusive tribes that way...not exactly what Jackson claims to want as far as I know.

        1. Almanian!   12 years ago

          I refuse to buy anything from Toshiba to this day because they sold submarine silent-propeller technology to the Soviets in the 80's.

          srsly

          1. Mad Scientist   12 years ago

            I'll admit I won't order Domino's pizza under any circumstances for their support of Tipper Gore back in the day.

            1. Episiarch   12 years ago

              It's...it's not because their pizza is an abomination?

              1. Mad Scientist   12 years ago

                There's also that, of course.

              2. Enough About Palin   12 years ago

                It's candied pizza if you ask me. Sweet crust, sweet sauce, sweet sausage.

                YUK!

                1. Cancer   12 years ago

                  They doubled the cheese after the Dept. of Agriculture "suggested" that they help out the beleaguered American Dairy Farmer. True story.

                  1. sgs   12 years ago

                    "True story."

                    No, it isn't.

                2. sgs   12 years ago

                  "It's candied pizza if you ask me"

                  You're thinking of papa john's, and if you're not, your taste buds are seriously fucked up.

              3. sgs   12 years ago

                Oh god would you people shut the fuck up with your totally invalid assumptions that people care about what you think?

                Especially on pizza and beer, you people are fucking insufferable.

                1. General Butt Naked   12 years ago

                  Another satisfied (pants-shitting) domino's customer speaks up!

                  Congratulations you win a "Pizza"!

            2. General Butt Naked   12 years ago

              I won't order domino's either because I don't like shitting my pants.

              1. Ted S.   12 years ago

                Shit somebody else's pants instead!

            3. #   12 years ago

              Your taste buds aren't enough of a reason to boycot dominos?

            4. Gorilla tactics   12 years ago

              I boycotted it because of the 'noid.

          2. JW   12 years ago

            "It reminds me of the heady days of Sputnik and Yuri Gagarin when the world trembled at the sound of our rockets. Now they will tremble again - at the sound of our silence. The order is: engage the silent drive."

            1. hamilton   12 years ago

              Dammit!

            2. Episiarch   12 years ago

              Some things in here don't react well to bullets.

              1. hamilton   12 years ago

                I knew I knew you from somewhere - you used to post on alt.sexy.bald.captains back in the usenet days, right?

                1. Episiarch   12 years ago

                  Look, Russians don't take a dump, son, without a plan.

                  1. JW   12 years ago

                    I will live in Montana. And I will marry a round American woman and raise rabbits, and she will cook them for me. And I will have a pickup truck... maybe even a "recreational vehicle." And drive from state to state. Do they let you do that?

                    1. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

                      Scottish Russian, New Zealander Russian. Why no Russian Russians?

                    2. LynchPin1477   12 years ago

                      Not if your within 100 miles of the border!

                2. JW   12 years ago

                  SHHHHHH! Ix-nay on the ald-bay!

            3. The DerpRider   12 years ago

              Give me one pint, Vasily. One ping only.

              1. The DerpRider   12 years ago

                Ha. Freud in the first sentence...

          3. hamilton   12 years ago

            Toshiba built Red October?

            1. Almanian!   12 years ago

              Just the propellers - those BASTARDS!

            2. Almanian!   12 years ago

              Pardon me:

              "Just the propellers - those inscrutable BASTARDS!

              fixed

          4. gaijin   12 years ago

            I refuse to buy GM cars to this day because...they suck!

        2. Dibbler   12 years ago

          Of course that's what Jackson and Sharpton want. They are leeches who profit off hatred and bigotry.

        3. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

          Say, Martin's family lives in Florida. Did Jackson just ask America to boycott the Martin family?

          Also, for those of us who live in Florida, do we boycott ourselves? How do we do that, Jesse?

          1. Episiarch   12 years ago

            I don't know, but if you can find a way, tell it to me so I can boycott you too.

            1. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

              Don't come to Florida. Don't buy anything that comes from Florida, like most produce during the winter months, orange juice, shrimp, Gulf oysters and fish, Disney World merchandise, and so on. Easy for you but not for others will be boycotting the Darden and Outback company restaurants.

              Probably shouldn't use satellite services for satellites launched from Florida, either.

              There's a whole lot more--Florida is a big state--but that's the problem of you boycotters.

              1. Episiarch   12 years ago

                I have no desire to boycott Florida, ProL. I want to boycott you. Just you.

                1. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

                  Targeted boycotts of that type are very difficult. For instance, President Obama eschews the messy and complicated boycott for the easy and consequence-free drone strike.

              2. SIV   12 years ago

                I'll get my oysters from multicultural Mississippi you racist cracker.

                1. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

                  They still have slavery there, fool!

          2. Raven Nation   12 years ago

            I've been sitting in my undisclosed location* for two hours and the ONLY thing CNN has been running are stories about Obama's statements on Trayvon. It's now wonder POTUS is such a narcissist. Look at all the enablers he has.

            * see above

            1. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

              Gotta keep trying to distract people from the bad government, bad economy, bad foreign policy, and bad president, after all.

              1. Raven Nation   12 years ago

                Ah, yes, that does explain things. However, I do think there is that whole issue that news people think that what is important to them is important to everyone.

          3. RBS   12 years ago

            These boycotts are usually ineffective. See NAACP, SC and BikeFest.

            1. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

              If he gets people to boycott Florida, I'm going to petition the state government to come up with something more racist, like more due process.

              Yeah, take that!

            2. Raven Nation   12 years ago

              CNN STILL on O & racism.

          4. VG Zaytsev   12 years ago

            It would be hilarious if Martin's parents lost their jobs because the boycott was successful.

    2. Brett L   12 years ago

      I hope he leads by example.

    3. JW   12 years ago

      Is he still boycotting Hymietown?

    4. Warrren   12 years ago

      If only there were no white people, then black kids would stop getting shot.

    5. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

      There are millions of blacks living in Florida, a good percentage of whom depend on tourist dollars. So, on behalf of Florida blacks, fuck you, Jesse.

      Also, on behalf of the rest of Florida, fuck you, Jesse.

      1. JW   12 years ago

        You can add on behalf of Maryland, too.

        Now that we can all speak for large groups of similar people, all bets are off.

  11. Night Elf Mohawk   12 years ago

    Maybe Jackson should suggest boycotting Chicago and see how that goes over.

    1. Fist of Etiquette   12 years ago

      He could join everyone else in boycotting Detroit.

    2. Mike M.   12 years ago

      Better yet, he should just shut his big stupid racist piehole and spend more time with his son before junior heads off to prison.

    3. CE   12 years ago

      Can't we all boycott the District of Columbia and every edict that comes out of it?

  12. Archduke Trousersenthusiast   12 years ago

    METROPOLITAN DIVISION????

    I hate Bettman now mor than ever

    1. Fist of Etiquette   12 years ago

      Ha! Metrosexual Division. Oh, wait, Pittsburgh is in that division...

      1. Ted S.   12 years ago

        Then it's properly named. (I presume they named it for Sidney Crysby?)

        1. Fist of Etiquette   12 years ago

          That's Cyndi Crysby to you. But there are others waaaaaaaaaaay more metro than 87.

    2. Cancer   12 years ago

      NHL hockey is ridiculous:

      widen the ice; eliminate the red line (or the prohibition on the two-line pass); eliminate icing.

      Also eliminate checking. All contact that is not accidental/incidental should lead to immediate ejection.

      1. The DerpRider   12 years ago

        Two line pass is gone. They need to change icing to amatuer rules. If there was no icing guys would be getting killed.

      2. General Butt Naked   12 years ago

        No contact?

        Are you trying to turn the NHL into the NFL?

        1. Cancer   12 years ago

          "roughing the stick-handler" will become a drone-able offense.

      3. Ted S.   12 years ago

        Now that Martin Brodeur's career is drawing to a close, they can get rid of the Martin Brodeur Memorial Trapezoid, too.

        It's not boring to have a goalie who's expert at puck-handling and starting a counterattack.

        1. Cancer   12 years ago

          From your lips to God's ears. SRSLY, what fucking imaginary problem were they trying to solve?!?

          1. Ted S.   12 years ago

            The Twenty-Nine Boring Teams didn't like the way the Devils played, and having a goalie who can handle the puck was part of that style.

        2. nipplemancer   12 years ago

          Now that Martin Brodeur's career is drawing to a close, they can get rid of the Martin Brodeur Memorial Trapezoid, too.

          Abso-fucking-lutely.

        3. Mickey Rat   12 years ago

          Only if a goaltender playing the puck behind the goal line can be hit. If a goalie wants to play defenseman, he should be able to stand being forechecked.

      4. Sy   12 years ago

        So... you want Swedish hockey? No fucking thank you.

        1. Cancer   12 years ago

          Yeah, I basically thought it would be easier to spell out the differences instead of just saying "Swedish hockey."

          So what's your counter-argument? I'm arguing a move away from traumatic brain injury and towards puck-handling and scoring.

          If I want to watch people striking and grappling each other, I'll switch over to MMA. (MMA is awesome--boxing, in contrast, is bullshit.)

          1. Sy   12 years ago

            "So what's your counter-argument?"

            Don't fix what aint broke? NHL has made huge strides in player safety, so unless you want to kill the entire sport in North America, smaller rinks and checking is going to be a part of the game.

            "If I want to watch people striking and grappling each other, I'll switch over to MMA. "

            MMA is gayer than 8 guys fucking 9 guys. IF I wanted to watch a bunch of Europeans flopping on the ground(ice) every time someone breathed on them, I'd watch soccer.

    3. The DerpRider   12 years ago

      Honestly. Is this his last F.U. to hockey fans?

    4. C. Anacreon   12 years ago

      No wonder Detroit is bankrupt. They're in the Atlantic division? Gee, they're only about ONE THOUSAND MILES AWAY FROM THE ATLANTIC OCEAN

  13. Cancer   12 years ago

    Philadelphia Narcotics Officer Caught in an FBI sting:

    http://articles.philly.com/201.....ted-dealer

    Denmark is a land of small, prosperous families, in contrast with the US which is filled with fat, violent imbeciles who are flummoxed by the preternaturally simple problem of pregnancy-prevention:

    http://www.culturechange.org/c.....iew/865/1/

  14. SIV   12 years ago

    Tumblr has rendered its sexually oriented blogs unsearchable, which will affect about 10 percent of content.

    If anyone has any issues accessing my fashion oriented tumblr blog please let me know. Those fucking yahoos at yahoo may have already flagged it (incorrectly) "NSFW" based on the blog content of some of my followers and rebloggers.

    1. Brett L   12 years ago

      This should read "Tumblr destroys business model"

      1. SweatingGin   12 years ago

        They must figure they'll make it up with the Social Justice Warrior tumblers.

        Besides, most of the pron ones are just thin privilege

        1. Brett L   12 years ago

          I'm torn between the one that starts: "This blog is not thin=bad, fat=good!" and the one about her husband daring to think that since airlines burn fuel in relation to mass, it is fair to charge people for total weight (person + bags) as to which is the best spit-take outrage.

          1. Ted S.   12 years ago

            It's the airlines' decision as to what pricing model they wish to use, and up to the rest of us to decide which airline we wish to use.

            It's schizophrenic how we're supposed to have a "War on Obesity", but when private sector organizations come up with ways to encourage people to be less obese (charging them lower prices, or the recent case of the Boy Scouts saying you need to stop being so chubby if you want to take part in the Jamboree), the same people with the warboners go nuts.

            1. Mad Scientist   12 years ago

              That's because they're more interested in punishing success than preventing failure.

              1. PapayaSF   12 years ago

                +1. Also, it's more fun for them to whip themselves into self-righteous outrage over a perceived injustice than to have a decentralized, non-coercive solution. (Centralized and coercive solutions are usually fine.)

          2. MJGreen   12 years ago

            "Thin privilege takes place when even when people do accept as true that you are healthy and free of leg pains "despite" of your size, they tell you it's only because you're young and you're fated to develop these problems later unless you go on a huge diet."

            Even if you're a fat person speaking from experience, it's thin privilege.

            Maybe the person has a point, lardo.

        2. MJGreen   12 years ago

          "(rebloggable because yes. -Fatanarchy)"

          Holy shit. These people seriously write in this broken up, Engrish-like style. They make Zero Wing sound coherent.

          Or that Arrested Development joke: "Jetpacks Was Yes"

          1. PH2050   12 years ago

            Prepare Yourself

            The Goobacks Are Coming

    2. Dweebston   12 years ago

      But why would I click if it's SFW?

      1. SIV   12 years ago

        Check out the Mexican model in the second post down.

    3. JW   12 years ago

      Wait, there's non-porn Tumblr?

      1. SweatingGin   12 years ago

        It's all otherkin and privilege and fat shaming and patriarchy and PROBLAMATIC!

        1. JW   12 years ago

          Look, I won't judge you for your kinks and you don't judge mine.

        2. BiMonSciFiCon   12 years ago

          Otherkin?

          1. Irish   12 years ago

            BEHOLD THE GLORY OF OTHERKIN!

            1. BiMonSciFiCon   12 years ago

              Yeah... That makes sense.

    4. Bobarian   12 years ago

      "Tumblr has rendered its sexually oriented blogs unsearchable, which will affect about 10 percent of content."

      I think you guys left a zero off on your figure of affected Tumblr content.

      1. Eduard van Haalen   12 years ago

        Stole my joke.

      2. Careless   12 years ago

        Every once in a while, a man can still be surprised by the amount of naked people and sex on the internet.

    5. Entropy Void   12 years ago

      Your blog reminds me of when I was in kindergarten and we were doing some paper mache thing ... I got ahold of the Sears catalog and saved the lingerie section from being part of some demented baloon wrapping. My mom found the crumpled section in my pocket while doing the wash ... I think that was when I got the "birds and the bees" talk ... ah good times ...

  15. Brett L   12 years ago

    An Occupy movement for the rest of us.

    1. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

      I agree with the sentiment, but that fake movement is best left in the memory hole.

  16. A Serious Man   12 years ago

    Charles Barkley does not think the Zimmerman verdict was tehr-ible.

    Outspoken former NBA superstar Charles Barkley said he agrees with the verdict in the murder trial of George Zimmerman, but blasted the media for giving platforms to racists to "vent" their ignorance.
    Barkley, 50, gave his assessment on the high-profile Florida murder trial to CNBC on Thursday, saying jurors simply did not have enough evidence to convict the former neighborhood watch volunteer in the 2012 killing of 17-year-old Trayvon Martin.
    "Well I agree with the verdict," Barkley said. "I feel sorry that young kid got killed, but they didn't have enough evidence to charge him. Something clearly went wrong that night ? clearly something went wrong ? and I feel bad for anybody who loses a kid, but if you looked at the case and you don't make it ? there was some racial profiling, no question about it ? but something happened that changed the dynamic of that night."

    Charles Barkley really is a reasonable guy, one of the best NBA commentators out there.

    1. Episiarch   12 years ago

      Knuckleheads!

      1. Killazontherun   12 years ago

        It sucked when they offed his character after the first season of Homicide.

    2. BiMonSciFiCon   12 years ago

      I really like the pregame/halftime shows on both TNT and ESPN. They have their weakness (Shaq, Magic) but are generally great. The NFL pregames could learn a thing or two from ESPN/TNT.

      P.S.- GINOBILI!

      1. CE   12 years ago

        Ditto.

      2. BiMonSciFiCon   12 years ago

        *weaknesses.

        Something something edit button.

    3. Not an Economist   12 years ago

      And getting hammered on Twitter.

      http://twitchy.com/2013/07/19/.....n-remarks/

      1. Irish   12 years ago

        When you're calling Charles Barkley, a man who wrote an autobiography called 'Who's Afraid of a Large Black Man?,' an Uncle Tom, that word has lost all meaning.

        1. VG Zaytsev   12 years ago

          Anyone asserting that all black people don't think alike is clearly a racist.

          Likewise, any nigga that doesn't embrace the thug life is an uncle tom, self hating racist.

          Because only racists reject stereotypes.

          Derp!

      2. General Butt Naked   12 years ago

        Damn, that's the most racist shit I've ever read.

    4. MJGreen   12 years ago

      Actually watching it made me respect the guy even more. Not only does he have a reasonable argument, he presents it calmly, rationally, sympathetically. If he was saying this on MSNBC he'd barely be able to get five words out before some chatterbox interrupted him to tell him he's wrong.

  17. Brett L   12 years ago

    Apparently a Brit tabloid trolled everyone by having royal look-a-likes head into the hospital where the royal scion is due to be delivered. I love the Brit newspapers.

    1. Enough About Palin   12 years ago

      Well I sure hope no one kills themselves over this little prank.

  18. NeonCat   12 years ago

    Couple denied adoption request because they own a pit mix.

    Warning: video autoplays.

    1. Dweebston   12 years ago

      This couple is one domestic dispute away from being adoptive parents if the cops get involved.

      1. thom   12 years ago

        Somebody should do them a favor and send a suspicious package to their house.

  19. A Serious Man   12 years ago

    Canadian mosquito tests positive for West Nile virus.

    1. NeonCat   12 years ago

      Proving that years of education has failed to teach mosquitoes to put condoms on their probosces.

    2. Archduke Trousersenthusiast   12 years ago

      break out the malathion!

  20. A Serious Man   12 years ago

    Judge rules that lawsuit against 'deceptive' labeling by Coca-Cola's Vitaminwater can proceed as a class action lawsuit.

    U.S. Magistrate Judge Robert M. Levy recommends that the plaintiffs can litigate for declaratory and injunctive relief, but not for damages.

    CSPI Michael F. Jacobson, executive director for the Center for Science in the Public Interest, said, "The marketing of vitaminwater will go down in history as one of the boldest and brashest attempts ever to affix a healthy halo to what is essentially a junk food, a non-carbonated soda. Vitaminwater, like Coca-Cola itself, promotes weight gain, obesity, diabetes, heart disease, and cannot deliver on any of the dishonest claims it has made over the years."

    I don't recall them ever making such claims, but okay.

    1. Ted S.   12 years ago

      The CSPI doesn't do science, and it's in the government interest, not the public interest.

    2. Enough About Palin   12 years ago

      I'm sucking down a Mexican Coca-Cola as we speak. Damn tasty.

    3. JW   12 years ago

      Vitamin water basically has half the calories of soda.

      Jacobson won't be happy until we're all toiling in the fields for the collective, eating nothing but a few bowls of rice and drinking rainwater.

      1. Enough About Palin   12 years ago

        Can we have a little rat meat?

        1. Nooge.   12 years ago

          No. Meat causes cancer and global warming.

    4. Mokers   12 years ago

      I once had this argument with somebody. They were arguing about how bad VItaminWater is for you. I said that you do actually get Vitamins from it, that it has less sugar than orange juice of the same size and fewer calories than a venti skinny latte. It is not necessarily a health drink, but it's probably better than drinking juice bought in the store.

      1. GILMORE   12 years ago

        ""I said that you do actually get Vitamins from it""

        Nope. Not really. You pee them all out. They're not in any bioavailable format.

        "" it's probably better than drinking juice bought in the store.""

        Also not true. The sweetener used in VM is Crystalline Fructose, which is very bad for your liver. Juice sugars are broken down by every cell in your body.

        Not that it matters. CSPI is still stupid and making noise for the sake of perpetuating their fight against food freedom. But VM is basically Gatorade sans electrolytes. Sugarwater, only with a sweetener that's worse for your body than HFCS.

        Disclosure: me is former food/beverage industry analyst, 12yrs or so.

  21. itsnotmeitsyou   12 years ago

    Detroit billionaire Dan Gilbert has said that parts of The Motor City need to be torn down. and built up again.

    Fixed it.

    1. Dweebston   12 years ago

      Someone yesterday suggested walling it off and making it a penal colony. I say we bring back Snake Pliskin for Escape from Detroit

    2. Archduke Trousersenthusiast   12 years ago

      Canada captured Detroit in 1812. You wouldn't let us keep it.

      1. Warrren   12 years ago

        You can have it now.

      2. The DerpRider   12 years ago

        Michigan lucked out when Ohio won Todedo.

  22. AlgerHiss   12 years ago

    If anyone wants the true, current flavor of Detroit's voters, you must tune in to "Hardcore Pawn" on TruTv:

    http://www.trutv.com/shows/har.....index.html

    That show will leave your mouth gaping and your eyes wide: Lots of hopey-changey folks living their lives.

    1. SweatingGin   12 years ago

      That show is just brutal. I can't watch it.

      It's within like 10 miles of where I live.

      1. creech   12 years ago

        And they vote too! The show must be scripted or something or the owners are fools for not having armed security in the store and parking lot at all times.

      2. The DerpRider   12 years ago

        Where? I grew up in Redford at 7 Mile and Beach. Matriculated to Birmingham and am living in farm country north of 69 now.

        1. SweatingGin   12 years ago

          Redford, in the Beach/Plymouth area.

          Now I've almost certainly said enough that some friend/family/NSA can tie "SweatingGin" to me.

          heh, north of 69 likely just means you get the Flint bankruptcy soon, right?

    2. Red Rocks Rockin   12 years ago

      The worst one had some she-beast getting denied the price she wanted, complaining, then turning around and doing some bizarre rump-shaking, chanting "I got a big azz, I got a big azz..."

      Seriously, WTF?

  23. Cancer   12 years ago

    Libertarian Economist says Don't Tax Sugar. I say: Tax sugar; double the tax on Tobacco; triple the tax on alcohol; put all savings into an income tax cut.

    http://www.usnews.com/debate-c.....-than-good

    Libertarian Party of Virginia's Gubernatorial Candidate is currently polling at 7% statewide. Here's his remarkable bio:

    http://robertsarvis.com/about

    1. Ted S.   12 years ago

      If the government is going to get involved in food policy, shouldn't they be promoting low-carb diets? Everybody knows it's the current incarnation of the food pyramid that's making people fat.

      1. Cancer   12 years ago

        I just want to eliminate the income tax. I'll tax anything else instead: body hair; flatulence; fornication; audible syllables; diapers; condoms; hair-extensions, etc.

      2. C. Anacreon   12 years ago

        Everybody knows it's the current incarnation of the food pyramid that's making people fat.

        You would think, but no. Even the First Wookie is all about low-fat and low-salt; at least, finally, she and others are talking about reducing sugar, but they still think fat in the food is what causes problems, not carbs. And an amazing number of moronic "dieticians," (a group far less intelligent than even el-ed majors) agree. (I work in a hospital, which is required to have a dietician on staff to make out the patient policies and menus. Our dietician weighs close to 300 lbs.)

        Instead of even low-sugar diets at the hospital now, we have to prescribe diabetics "consistent carb" diets, whatever the hell that means.

        People that 'know better than we do' will fight to the death that salt (only 20% of the population is blood-pressure salt-sensitive, the rest of us can have all we want) and fat (presence in diet leads to cessation of hunger, therefore you eat less and lose weight -- also, fat in food doesn't directly become fat in your body -- your body makes its own fat) are the major problems facing American diets. And they are absolutely wrong -- but we will have to deal with bland, tasteless food mandates as a result, and people will still become obese and hypertensive at rising rates.

        1. Cancer   12 years ago

          (I work in a hospital, which is required to have a dietician on staff to make out the patient policies and menus. Our dietician weighs close to 300 lbs

          What the...?!? I can't even...!?!

          Seriously, how is this possible. It should be illegal. (How about that for occupational licensing? No test, just prove you're not a grossly unhealthy freak if you want to be a professional food-nazi.)

          But, really, I'm going to need to see pics.

  24. Rich   12 years ago

    Analyzing the USA Today article & Obama's speech will take more effort than I can muster now. However, it may be worth doing, based on a few initial snark-snippets.

    Obama said Friday that all Americans should respect the George Zimmerman verdict of acquittal, but

    He respects the 1A, but.

    "Trayvon Martin could have been me 35 years ago,"
    George Washington Carver could have been him 135 years ago.

    Obama ... talked about how he has been subjected to casual prejudice.
    Now we have "casual prejudice" in addition to othering and microaggression. Just make them all hate crimes and be done with it!

    He also said African Americans need to address the problems of violence in their own communities.
    This has been said a million times before.

    African-American males know they are more likely to be ... "perpetrators of violence"
    See preceding snark.

    The problem is that so many people ... see all black young men as potential criminals, Obama said.
    If only they were seen as potential *terrorists* like everyone else.

    Etc. 8-(

    1. Enough About Palin   12 years ago

      Here's the question no one seems to ask, has the burglary rate decreased in Zimmerman's neighborhood since the shooting?

      1. Rich   12 years ago

        RACIST!

    2. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

      Here's what Obama is really saying: "I oppose the high burden of proof in criminal cases."

  25. A Serious Man   12 years ago

    In other Zimmerman-related news, Obama has said that "Trayvon Martin could have been me 35 years ago."

    Does this also mean Michelle could have been Rachel Jeantel 35 years ago?

    1. Episiarch   12 years ago

      Is Jeantel a wookie?

      1. Rich   12 years ago

        she simply responded, "Look at me"

      2. JW   12 years ago

        She's more a Hutt.

  26. Stormy Dragon   12 years ago

    In other Zimmerman-related news, Obama has said that "Trayvon Martin could have been me 35 years ago."

    So Obama is both Father and Son? He really does have a Messiah complex.

    1. Enough About Palin   12 years ago

      Gotta love his spirit!

      1. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

        The Teleprompter is the Holy Spirit in this analogy.

    2. Marshall Gill   12 years ago

      So Obama is both Father and Son? He really does have a Messiah complex.

      He is the bride at every wedding and the widow at every funeral.

  27. A Serious Man   12 years ago

    Photo blog: This is what Fracking really looks like.

    Matt Damon even made a movie about it so it must be true. Fracking will make your water catch on fire!

    1. Irish   12 years ago

      This is what fracking really looks like.

      1. Gorilla tactics   12 years ago

        you didn't drill that

    2. Metazoan   12 years ago

      Nick Deremer, 22, a kayak tour operator, shows where methane has been bubbling in the Susquehanna River. He attributes it to gas drilling and wants to leave his home state because of the the shale exploration.

      Couldn't possibly be because the Susquehanna is filled with sewage, often containing methanogenic archaea.

      1. JW   12 years ago

        WHAT? A naturally occurring gas is seeping into an ecosystem!?

        To the ramparts!

        1. Warrren   12 years ago

          What about the ram farts?

      2. Michael   12 years ago

        Nick Deremer, 22, a kayak tour operator, shows where methane has been bubbling in the Susquehanna River.

        Oddly, no bubbles were seen until Mr. Deremer waded past waist deep.

      3. MJGreen   12 years ago

        Well, he thinks it's due to fracking. So, case closed.

      4. Nooge.   12 years ago

        22-year-old Nick Deremer has probably accounted for and dismissed the idea that any of the Archaea could be responsible for the phenomenon he describes. I mean, he's a kayak tour operator. You don't just fall into that sort of work. It takes guts and brains.

  28. The Immaculate Trouser   12 years ago

    "The gun is good. The penis is evil... go forth and kill!"

    Like George Zimmerman, Michael David Dunn is a vile racist whose boiling fear and hatred?plus his almighty gun?all came together to take the life randomly of a young black man whose only crime was existing in a way that Dunn disapproved of. Dunn encountered a group of teenagers being teenagers, and seems to have felt that they should pay the blood price for being young when he disapproved:

    Racist or no, if your almighty gun is boiling before it "comes together", you should see a doctor.

    1. Irish   12 years ago

      Like George Zimmerman

      Citation of George Zimmerman's racism sorely needed.

      1. NeonCat   12 years ago

        Obviously your racism has blinded you to how racist GZ is. You probably believe you have seen evidence that GZ isn't racist, which is just your racism creating fantasies to convince you that you aren't racist.

      2. The Immaculate Trouser   12 years ago

        Citations are racist.

      3. Warrren   12 years ago

        He hates 3/4ths of every black person he comes across.

    2. Longtorso, Johnny   12 years ago

      Again, anyone wanna see my pump action?

      1. NeonCat   12 years ago

        Pfft, we all know you go off half-cocked.

    3. Ted S.   12 years ago

      "The gun is good. The penis is evil... go forth and kill!"

      You just like Sean Connery don't you?

      1. The Immaculate Trouser   12 years ago

        Never pass on the opportunity to make a Zardoz reference.

  29. Cancer   12 years ago

    I love the fact that that story about GW pharmaceuticals selling cannabis-as-a-naval-spray is in Bloomberg Business Week.

    Didn't Bloomie just explain a few weeks ago that marijuana has no medicinal value? (You know it's hard-earned knowledge he gleaned from his lengthy medical training, years of clinical practice, and decades of laboratory experience.)

    Michael Bloomberg: Earth's greatest cunt-nugget or The Milky Way's Greatest Cunt-Nugget?

    1. Generic Stranger   12 years ago

      naval-spray

      That's an...odd method of delivery.

    2. Nooge.   12 years ago

      An argument against marijuana's medicinal properties is especially mendacious, seeing as how marijuana's primary psychoactive ingredient is prescribed by physicians as a medicine, and has been for many years.

  30. The Immaculate Trouser   12 years ago

    The mind of a leftist:

    American companies have been piling up more and more cash lately, which perversely has become a talking point for why the government should make public policy friendlier to large rich established companies[...]

    I think a less ridiculous viewpoint would be to say that the enormous volume of cash on hand that many companies have obtained goes to show that they should pay their workers more.

    Businesses should be little more than alternative forms of welfare for their employees.

    Oy.

    1. Irish   12 years ago

      BUSINESS AND ECONOMICS BLOGGER!

      1. The Immaculate Trouser   12 years ago

        Someone should come up with a wiki for all of Matt's stupid ideas of economics and find the country that matches up with them the most.

        I'm guessing Equatorial Guinea or Zimbabwe...

        1. Irish   12 years ago

          Zimbabwe's a good guess, especially since Yglesias was claiming that the secret to wealth equality is everyone having the same amount of land.

          That sounds an awful lot like the justification for the ridiculous Zimbabwean land redistribution that resulted in their hyper-inflation.

        2. JW   12 years ago

          Someone should come up with a wiki for all of Matt's stupid ideas of economics

          That would be like looking directly at a Medusan. No man can do that and not be driven insane.

    2. Episiarch   12 years ago

      It's the mind of someone who thinks whatever is yours is theirs to take as they will. The only thing they lack is the might to do it, which is why they love the state so much: it does have the might.

    3. Almanian!   12 years ago

      Well, DUH! That's why MY company is "hoarding cash" (??). So we can pay everyone moar in the future! YAY!

      This person probably doesn't realize that some absurd number of businesses end up failing? *bing.com* ~34% fail in the first two years, and another ~30% fail in the next two (BLS data).

      But, sure - we're all just screwing the workers. CAUGHT US! Raises all around!

      1. Careless   12 years ago

        The number of businesses that fail in the first two years and were stockpiling cash in that time has got to be close to zero

    4. Ted S.   12 years ago

      Didn't you say yesterday that you'd reached your Yglesias quota for the week?

      1. The Immaculate Trouser   12 years ago

        I tried, but I had to get my hit, man.

        *Looks around room; rubs arm nervously*

  31. Longtorso, Johnny   12 years ago

    I'll just leave this here:

    Porn for Epi

    1. Almanian!   12 years ago

      I'll be in Warty's bunk....

      1. Longtorso, Johnny   12 years ago

        With Warth?

        1. Longtorso, Johnny   12 years ago

          Warty, dammit

        2. Nooge.   12 years ago

          Warth Vader. Yeah.

    2. Warrren   12 years ago

      Is that what a Sleestak crossed with human would look like?

    3. Almanian!   12 years ago

      "The devil general Bennington can becomes their lifes a hell"

      I think you know what I'm talking about, Johnny.

    4. Rich   12 years ago

      What's that thing on its leg?

    5. gaijin   12 years ago

      Why are they always wearing hose? Yuck!

  32. Nikkis enthusiastic dissent   12 years ago

    Sadly, I can't hang out in PM links today (gotta run), but I wanted to pop in and say I am very suspicious that at lunchtime while I was in my car I was racially targeted in a black neighborhood by people throwing bottles at my car. The people doing it looked like at least 30 or so--not kids. No damage, fortunately.

    1. Mad Scientist   12 years ago

      Collectivists gonna collective. Glad there's no damage.

    2. JW   12 years ago

      NOW are you ready to renounce your white, cisgender privilege?

      1. Episiarch   12 years ago

        nicole isn't white, she's part WOP, remember.

        1. Almanian!   12 years ago

          Jesus - that's worse than Irish!

          1. Episiarch   12 years ago

            Well, of course; she is the worst.

            1. JW   12 years ago

              Irish and Italian!?

              1. Episiarch   12 years ago

                No, no, just English and Italian. That's bad enough. If it were Irish and Italian she wouldn't be the worst, she'd be a monster.

                1. Irish   12 years ago

                  If it were Irish and Italian she wouldn't be the worst, she'd be a monster.

                  -Runs from room crying-

                  1. Episiarch   12 years ago

                    Another dagomick exposed!

                    1. Warrren   12 years ago

                      Woppaddy?

        2. Enough About Palin   12 years ago

          "she's part WOP, remember"

          Just the mustache.

    3. Irish   12 years ago

      I was once in a poor part of Chicago for an old job I had and a black woman told me that 'my people' weren't welcome in 'her neighborhood.'

      Remember: racial targeting is okay if black people do it to white people, and even mentioning how common such racial targeting is is racist.

      1. Almanian!   12 years ago

        RACIST!

      2. thom   12 years ago

        I've been told by a few people that it was excusable for Trayvon Martin to profile and then attack George Zimmerman because "imagine if you were Trayvon".

      3. PH2050   12 years ago

        This seems to ridiculous to me; my experience as a white male married to a black female showed me only white people are ever racist. Blacks are incapable of such.

        /sarc

  33. The Immaculate Trouser   12 years ago

    Wherein Matty says something that isn't stupid and is worth discussing:

    Conservatives are eager to blame Detroit's problems hazily on "Democrats," and in most respects I think that's wildly misleading. But I do think there's an important sense in which they're correct. American cities across the board suffer from a lack of partisan competition that undermines democratic accountability.

    He goes on to discuss this topic and posits that non-competitive political environments tend to degrade the quality of governance. Here's my question: if that is the case, then why is it that places like Texas, and not swing states like Ohio, are the solid economic performers in the US?

    1. Stormy Dragon   12 years ago

      Economic performance doesn't seem to correlate with partisanship:

      http://www.businessinsider.com.....wth-2013-6

      1. Irish   12 years ago

        You need to compare like to like. Well off, almost entirely white states like Connecticut and so forth are going to do well no matter what their partisan tendencies are.

        Texas vs. California, the South vs. the Midwest, are the comparison you have to make because they're demographically similar.

        Texas and California have similar racial makeups, yet Texas is in far better shape. That's a better comparison than Connecticut to South Carolina, for example, since the demographics of those states are totally different.

      2. Irish   12 years ago

        Actually, looking at the map, Connecticut seems to be doing really poorly. That surprises me somewhat. I'm also surprised that Mississippi seems to have done alright, considering that it's probably the worst educated state in the country.

        1. The Immaculate Trouser   12 years ago

          Mississippi is starting from a very low economic base. It's essentially the only state in the South that really didn't make an effort to modernize its economy in the 70s-80s. Haley Barbour has been surprisingly good on reforming the government there, but it is starting from a low base.

          Basically, same sort of thing that explains China's growth: convergence.

        2. Stormy Dragon   12 years ago

          As I said, there doesn't seem to be any clear correlations to partisan a particular state is. There's one party states doing well (TX, CA). One party states doing terrible (NY, AK). Swing states doing well (IN). Swing states doing bad (VA).

          1. Night Elf Mohawk   12 years ago

            Wait, CA is doing well? Over what time period?

            1. Irish   12 years ago

              Last year their GDP growth was decent. They're one of the only states in the country with an overall GDP that's still lower than it was before the recession. They also have really high unemployment.

              I don't know where that GDP boost last year came from.

              1. The Immaculate Trouser   12 years ago

                Construction. CA was hard hit by the housing bubble, and that sector has picked up recently. Almost everything else is a shambles.

              2. VG Zaytsev   12 years ago

                CA's unemployment rate has been higher than the national rate every month for the last two decades.

          2. The Immaculate Trouser   12 years ago

            CA isn't doing well at all, Stormy. GDP growth from a near-decimated (and yes, I'm using the word correctly you pedants 🙂 ) GDP as a result of the housing bubble is nowhere near compensating for the fleeing of their human capital, time series data on the subject, measuring over pop growth compared to employment/workforce participation, etc.

          3. Virginian   12 years ago

            CA is doing well? VA is doing bad? What the hell are you babbling about?

      3. The Immaculate Trouser   12 years ago

        I wanted to throw out certain states (like ND) precisely because the reasons for their current economic success are not endogenous to the political economy.

        I also prefer time-series to snapshot data as well as looking at a few other indicators (employment rate, workforce participation, net emigration, etc) as it tells a more complete picture. (I thought I had some links bookmarked for that, but apparently I don't or I have it on my non-work computer.)

        Personally, I don't have an answer for that question per se but there are some general observations worth sharing:

        The South has been doing very well historically speaking, and has basically caught up (and is now starting to surpass) the average US state in terms of living standards and economic performance. This is all fairly recent (70s and 80s onwards).

        The NEast is doing OK, but not great. Seems to me that this is mostly inertia; still not terrible at all.

        Places like CA have growing GDP but that's pretty much it. The only people moving there on the whole are poorer Mexicans; the direction of US emigration is outside the state.

        Swing states aren't doing well *at all*. Outside of IN (which has definitely moved GOP over the years), there isn't a single swing state that is in the top 10 economic performers on basically any stat worth considering.

        1. Irish   12 years ago

          Northeast doesn't seem to be doing well at all, actually. Looking at Stormy's data, the Northeast had the lowest economic growth of anywhere in the country.

          Of course, part of that is the fact that the Northeast has historically been the richest place in America. It's harder to grow at really massive rates when you are already pretty rich.

          1. The Immaculate Trouser   12 years ago

            the Northeast has historically been the richest place in America. It's harder to grow at really massive rates when you are already pretty rich.

            Plus there actually has been a huge amount of competition in recent years from other places around the world to try and do NYC and finance better. Thatcher's London basically went from zero to hero on that front in the 80s, for example and plenty of places in East Asia opened up as alternatives for the economies in that region to invest.

            Definitely not impressive performance, but could have been worse *shrugs*

        2. buddhastalin   12 years ago

          Places like CA have growing GDP but that's pretty much it. The only people moving there on the whole are poorer Mexicans; the direction of US emigration is outside the state.

          Actually, the people moving to California are rich people. The people who are leaving are the middle and lower class, and more Hispanics leave than enter, according to this article:

          In fact, since 2005 California has experienced a net in-migration of households earning more than $200,000, according to the U.S. Census's American Community Survey.

          As it happens, most of California's outward-bound migrants are low- to middle-income, with relatively little education: those typically employed in agriculture, construction, manufacturing, hospitality and to some extent natural-resource extraction.

          ...two Hispanics have moved out for every one that has moved in from another state.

          1. The Immaculate Trouser   12 years ago

            There's still plenty of migration coming from Mexico that is dirt-poor. You are right though; lots of low- and middle-class emigration out of CA to greener pastures.

            Didn't know about the migration of greater than $200,000 to Cali, thanks.

      4. Sidd Finch   12 years ago

        I don't see any reason that a hypothetical partisan competition effect would translate from cities to states.

  34. sloopyinca   12 years ago

    OK, this nonsense has gone on long enough. There have been what any right-minded person would consider riots after the George Zimmerman verdict came in. 17 arrests in downtown Hollywood alone and a great deal of property damage.

    I want my fucking action figure!

    1. Episiarch   12 years ago

      Doesn't qualify as a riot, it's merely acting up. Let's throw it to the commentariat: have there been "riots" as you would think of riots?

      1. The Immaculate Trouser   12 years ago

        Nope, not unless you want to count Occupy Whatever movements as riots as well.

        1. Episiarch   12 years ago

          Exactly. I wouldn't even call the Occupy mess that occurred in Seattle a riot; it was a march with some troublemakers who wanted to smash shit.

          1. Almanian!   12 years ago

            I predicted riots - I can't see we got what I consider "riots". SHIT!

        2. sloopyinca   12 years ago

          We set guidelines. There was a property damage and arrest threshold for a particular zip code. Both of those were met. Epi can wax poetic on this all day long, but we set the parameters and this met them.

          1. Episiarch   12 years ago

            I don't recall agreeing to your unilateral rules. There were no riots. You can try and technicality your way out of that, but it doesn't change the fact that you're a poopyhead and you should go take a long walk off a short pier.

            1. sloopyinca   12 years ago

              I'm pretty sure we agreed to the terms but my laziness precludes me from looking it up.

          2. Stormy Dragon   12 years ago

            If property damage in a particular zip code is you measure, most major cities have probably been in a non-stop riot for 150 years now.

            1. sloopyinca   12 years ago

              Property damage plus a dozen arrests, IIRC. LA went flying past that.

              Take a collection for all I care, Epi, but pay up, motherfucker.

              1. Episiarch   12 years ago

                I made it very clear that even I were to pay up, you only get Mouth. Because that's all you deserve.

                "The marijuana goes in the top drawer. The cocaine and speed go in the second drawer. And the heroin goes in the bottom drawer. Always separate the drugs."

                1. sloopyinca   12 years ago

                  Aye, dios mio!

              2. Stormy Dragon   12 years ago

                Again, I'm not sure 17 arrests in a week is out of the ordinary for downtown Hollywood. Were Hugh Grant and Eddy Murphy rioting too?

                1. sloopyinca   12 years ago

                  It was 17 in about 1 hour.

          3. Irish   12 years ago

            We set guidelines. There was a property damage and arrest threshold for a particular zip code.

            Where did this happen? I haven't seen what I would consider riots, so unless you can show me where the rules were agreed on, I have to side with Epi.

            1. sloopyinca   12 years ago

              We did it one day last week, but I'm lazy and am not going to look it up.

              It's no big deal. I will just take my hate for Epi up another notch.

      2. CE   12 years ago

        No, no riots, just people upset about a movie trailer.

        1. Almanian!   12 years ago

          +4 dead Americans

      3. Rich   12 years ago

        it's merely acting up

        I believe the PC term is "unrest".

        1. Enough About Palin   12 years ago

          No, "protests".

      4. Night Elf Mohawk   12 years ago

        Way short of "riots."

      5. Apatheist ?_??   12 years ago

        No but I'm waiting to see what happens with Quannel X's march through the wealthiest neighborhood in Houston.

        This is what our local race baiter has said about River Oaks in the past:

        "[i]f you feel that you just got to mug somebody because of your hurt and your pain, go to River Oaks and mug you some good white folks. If you're angry that our brother is put to death, don't burn down your own community, give these white folks hell from the womb to the tomb."

        He also recently blamed an 11-year old Mexican girl for her gang rape by 18 black men aged 14-27.

        1. Irish   12 years ago

          He also recently blamed an 11-year old Mexican girl for her gang rape by 18 black men aged 14-27.

          WHAT!?!

          Oh, Jesus.

          "It is segregating our community," Brenda Myers, the head of the Community and Children's Impact Center in Cleveland, Texas, told HLN's Vinnie Politan on Monday. "There's a lot of anger, a lot of vicious remarks toward the little girl."

          "It was not the young girl that yelled rape. Stop right there -- something is wrong, brothers and sisters," Quanell X said.
          And, speaking over yells of support from the crowd, he also questioned the role of the girl's parents.

          Dammit.

        2. Sidd Finch   12 years ago

          I remember that. The NYT ran a on the one hand/on the other hand story about gang rape. Disgusting.

          1. Apatheist ?_??   12 years ago

            He's such a crazy fuck the Nation of Islam kicked him out.

            1. Brett L   12 years ago

              Everything's bigger in Texas. Including the assholes.

    2. Zeb   12 years ago

      Those aren't riots. It seems like they are trying to riot, but you need a much bigger angry mob with some momentum before I'll call it a riot.

  35. Sidd Finch   12 years ago

    Via Walter Olsen:

    http://beatnikmalcontent.blogs.....ly_30.html

    Another reason to favor atheism is that it liberates your mind and also opens the way to progressive social and political ideas. Or at least I thought so until I encountered the latest crop of rightwing, neo-con, close-minded "atheists" who have become minor media stars. The emergence of reactionary atheism is a new development...

    Christopher Hitchens was a pseudo-leftist who bolted to the far right when it suited his inflated ego and pocket book. His rants against religion were not honest explanations of the benefits of atheism. Their main thrust was hysterical, racist, Islamophobia, and an endorsement of US imperialism's endless wars. Ditto for Sam Harris, another neo-con phoney. These people are basically rightist propagandist,s hailing neoliberal pillage of the world's resources by the corporate/banking/military interests that defines the USA's permanent ruling class. We get a lot about Islamo-fascism from these guys, but the growing influence of Israeli Judeo-fascism escapes their notice.

    yikes

    1. Irish   12 years ago

      Another reason to favor atheism is that it liberates your mind and also opens the way to progressive social and political ideas.

      It liberates your mind by making you think exactly the way I do.

      1. Stormy Dragon   12 years ago

        Actually I agree with that point. Most "atheists" haven't actually stopped beliving in God, they just switched to a more subtle form of their imaginary friend that controls everything like "society" or "government".

        1. Gorilla tactics   12 years ago

          the mind abhors a vaccum

      2. PapayaSF   12 years ago

        Hating Jews is sooo progressive! How dare the ones in Israel object to being murdered by the Arabs who have been trying to do that for generations now?

    2. Ted S.   12 years ago

      You're only broad-mindeed if you think the same way I do.

      I've seen "diversity" described with the acronym LETELU: Looks Exotic, Thinks Exactly Like Us.

    3. Metazoan   12 years ago

      How asinine. I'm not sure how strongly my religious views/loss thereof have correlated with my political views, but atheism has certainly not opened a way to progressivism for me. Quite the opposite!

      1. Mad Scientist   12 years ago

        It's confirmation bias. Believing in the state instead of a god is more amenable to their predetermined political outlook.

    4. C. Anacreon   12 years ago

      Christopher Hitchens was a pseudo-leftist

      Oh really? And the author is a f'real leftist, I guess.
      The author can't lick Hitchens' jockstrap.

      1. Irish   12 years ago

        Hitchens was such a pseudo-leftists that he would literally travel to dangerous nations in order to agitate in favor of the Democratic process, thus putting himself in actual, personal danger.

        This guy writes a blog.

        Clearly he has more credibility than Hitchens.

        1. The Immaculate Trouser   12 years ago

          It's like how fucking Camus and Sartre would write long harangues denouncing George Orwell -- the guy who actually went abroad and fought for leftists causes while they did diddly squat during the Nazi occupation.

  36. Longtorso, Johnny   12 years ago

    Weirdest, Worst Attempted Assault Excuse Ever: "I Had Sex With My Cat And Everyone Knows"

    1. Longtorso, Johnny   12 years ago

      Man Has Sex With A Hornets' Nest And Dies

      1. Warrren   12 years ago

        Buzz kill.

        1. C. Anacreon   12 years ago

          How long have you waited to use that one?

      2. Rich   12 years ago

        He should have seen a doctor instead to treat that 4-hour erection; but what a way to go!

      3. PapayaSF   12 years ago

        Sorry, but this story originated in the Swedish version of the Onion.

  37. CE   12 years ago

    Make Detroit a tax free zone, and watch it become the world's greatest city.

    1. Warrren   12 years ago

      And regulation-free zone.

    2. Cancer   12 years ago

      I've been informed that there's gambling, prostitution, and drugs already happening in Detroit.

      Tax and regulate or just keep it au naturel legal?

      1. Almanian!   12 years ago

        Gmabling, prostitution and drugs already happening in Detroit - BUT ENOUGH ABOUT THE POLICE DEPARTMENT....!

        I'll be here all weekend! Too bad for you if you already bought a ticket! Enjoy the veal!

        1. Warrren   12 years ago

          Her?

    3. Almanian!   12 years ago

      It's pretty tax free now. That's why they ain't got no money, yo.

      /oh snap!

    4. The Immaculate Trouser   12 years ago

      You need to kill its labor regs first.

      Frankly, the regulatory environment and entitled union labor force in the Rust Belt is much rougher on their economy than taxes in those states.

  38. sloopyinca   12 years ago

    Minnesota police chief given a paid vacation after being charged with domestic violence. There are fears that the charge may be a violation of his parole from a previous conviction.

    That's right. The police chief gets vacation after slapping his woman around and that might also be a parole violation.

    1. Ted S.   12 years ago

      They let people with previous convictions be in the police department?

      1. Almanian!   12 years ago

        Convictions are "Life Experiences" that help the Peace Officer better understand and relate to civilians. They generally help them be BETTER officers down the road.

        hth

        1. sloopyinca   12 years ago

          He's the "chief" of a department of one. But even money says he's part of a CBA that prevents the city/town/village from terminating him at will, even with a pair of convictions and a probation violation on his record.

          Meanwhile, Lindsay Lohan is still going back and forth to jail for a 5 year old DUI.

        2. Dunphy (the real one)   12 years ago

          Yes. they let people with previous convictions and./or convictions DURING their service be on the police dept. Depends on the severity and type of offense.

          For example, I know of 3 officers on my agency who were arrested for DUI who kept their job. The average punishment is a week w/o pay. And yes, they get "paid suspension" (admin leave) while the case is being adjudicated. That's for a # of reasons, to include the fact that they might be found not guilty.

          As for this guy's previous offense, it was drunk and disorderly. That's a relatively minor offense and it's not surprising he kept his job because of it.

          If he gets convicted of DV Assault he will definitely lose his job, among other reasons, he wouldn't be able to legally carry a firearm if he is convicted of DV assault.

          Generally speaking, an offense that won't result in automatic firing is a first offense (iow officer in good standing) misdemeanor crime that does not involve "moral turpitude" or dishonesty.

          Druunk and disorderly is such a charge

          1. sloopyinca   12 years ago

            And they treat drunk and disorderly "civilians" exactly the same way, right?

            Or do many civilians get this kind of treatment from the local police when they are accused of committing a crime? You can say they do, but the newspapers are filled with page after page of the arrest records and pending charges of non-cops, and the department spokesmen feel pretty good about discussing cases and evidence when it's not one of their own being accused.

            Double standard again...

            1. Dunphy (the real one)   12 years ago

              what double standard are you alleging? It doesn't even say what they are accused of, so what "special treatment" are they getting?

              God forbid you could stick to the case we are discussing though

              1. sloopyinca   12 years ago

                It doesn't even say what they are accused of, so what "special treatment" are they getting?

                Well, not saying what they are charged with is double standard #1. Not releasing their names is another. That's routinely released by the police when a "civilian" is charged with a crime. And they routinely give out information on evidence that helps the prosecution.

                Tell you waht, find me a news report that says the following: "The police are investigating a pair of people for possible criminal violations. The names of the potential offenders is not being released by the department nor are the charges they are potentially facing. That is all."

                You find that and I'll fly all the way up there and kiss the bare ass of any police officer you ask me to.

                1. Dunphy (the real one)   12 years ago

                  You are making assumptions. It doesn't say they are being CHARGED with anything, and it doesn't say they have sufficient PC *to* charge. It merely says they are under investigation.

                  When it comes to "civilians" police agencies USUALLY do not release who they are INVESTIGATING, they only release when they ARREST the person

                  So, that is your error of logic here. You are making an equivalence with a "civilian" being ARRESTED and in this case you cite it does not say the agency has PC, so there is no analogy here. I can't remember my agency ever releasing information that we are investigating person X (in rare cases they will release person of interest when those persons are outstanding and need to be located).

                  1. sloopyinca   12 years ago

                    Yeah, police departments never say they are investigating people until all the facts are in and charges filed. RIIIIIIIIIIIGHT!

                    1. Dunphy (the real one)   12 years ago

                      i didn't say Never. The strawmen Neverstop.

                    2. sloopyinca   12 years ago

                      I can't remember my agency ever releasing information that we are investigating person X (in rare cases they will release person of interest when those persons are outstanding and need to be located).

                      Never. Ever. Same fucking difference.

                    3. Dunphy (the real one)   12 years ago

                      I said MY agency. Again, read for content. I also said that they USUALLY don't do it.

                      We do TONS of investigations thatturn out to be unfounded and those peoples names are not released.

                      Agencies will sometimes release names. I stand by my previous statement because it's the truth

      2. Zeb   12 years ago

        Yeah, I would think that being on parole would disqualify you as an active police officer.

    2. Dunphy (the real one)   12 years ago

      Do you really not understand that "paid vacation" is part of due process DURING the investigation? It;'s not punishment. He very well may be punished but that comes AFTER the investigation is complete. It's not a bad thing. It means he won't be in contact with the public or other officers UNTIL the case is properly investigated and his punishment is handed out, if there is such punishment.

      --"Deputy Mayor Lowell Stewart said Swenson was suspended on the advice of City Attorney Jeff Pederson until "resolution of the issues that are on the table."

      exactly. ONCE the case is resolved, then he gets punished.

      Do you think it's a bad thing that he be placed on paid leave during the investigation? What else should the dept. do - keep him working in a capacity where he interacts with the public and other officers?

      I really don't get the outrage over "paid vacation". Should the punishment come BEFORE the investigation? What other choice is there?

      Seriously.

      1. Enough About Palin   12 years ago

        JUST STFU, cunt.

      2. sloopyinca   12 years ago

        He is being called in to answer to the court whether or not he violated his probation FROM A PREVIOUS CONVICTION. This has nothing to do with "due process", fuckface. It's an egregious case of continuing to employ a piece of shit criminal as a police officer because they can't just fire him at will.

        Go suck a turd.

        1. Dunphy (the real one)   12 years ago

          Jesus Christ. So typical you resort to childish frothy name calling. Seriously, grow up. This just shows the difference between here and volokh.com.

          Adults vs. petulant children. Adults can discuss issues without devolving to this kind of childish stuff.

          They are continuing to employ him because he had a chippy prior conviction (drunk and disorderly).

          He is NOW accused of a firable offense, but he was given paid leave WHILE the case is adjudicated. Does the article say it has been adjudicated as a probation violation yet?

          No, it doesn't.

          1. RBS   12 years ago

            Hear that sloopy? The ADULTS are talking...

          2. sloopyinca   12 years ago

            You keep twisting his prior to make it look like it was no big deal. Sorry, but "drunk and disorderly" is a civil infraction, not a misdemeanor that is likely to get anyone sentenced to 30 days (stayed for probation). I'm thinking it was a bit more serious than that.

            By the way, this is the asshole you're defending, dunphy. Feel free to keep towing the company lion, regardless of how big a clown you end up looking like for doing so.

            1. Dunphy (the real one)   12 years ago

              #1 I'm not "defending" him. If he committed DV Assault, he should be fired.

              #2 Drunk and disorderly can't be a civil infraction in that jurisdiction, if the penalty includes jail time. Civil infraction can only have civil penalties.

              But yea, I consider drunk and disrderly to be a minor offense. Fwiw, in my state we don't even have a drunk in public law.

              Again, please show me where I am defending him. I certainly don't think he should retain his job if he is convicted of DV Assault IV

              I also don't think he should keep his job if he is found not guilty, but if the internal investigation finds him to have committed the Assault (note the internal investigation will have a lesser standard of evidence)

              If he is convicted, he CAN'T work as a cop anyway, since he wont be able to carry a gun

            2. sloopyinca   12 years ago

              FTA: It was just last March when a Minnesota Conservation officer caught Swenson in a car with a woman, in Swenson's words, "getting busy." To that embarrassing moment, the chief responded, "if it had been me, I'd never have mentioned a word of it. So what?"

              Shall I go into the details of him answering a domestic disturbance call while inebriated? Because, you know, the other officers on scene were pretty nice to not have tested him when he showed up armed and driving a police car while smelling of alcohol. But they do that for armed civilians that drive up smelling of booze as well, I'm sure...

              1. Dunphy (the real one)   12 years ago

                If he was doing that, he should be fired. That's a bright line issue.

                1. sloopyinca   12 years ago

                  But the officers on scene protected the thick blue wall and let it ride. And I can fucking assure you that a police officer happening upon a civilian in a vehicle with a gun on their hip that smells of booze isn't going to slough it off as not worthy of attention.

                  You know there is a double-standard at play here. It's OK, we'll all still feel exactly the same about you tomorrow even if you do admit it.

                  1. Dunphy (the real one)   12 years ago

                    Of course sometimes officers cut other officers a break. I've never denied that. Is that a double standard? Of course it is. I've conceded that about a dozen times.

                    And I don't care how you "feel about me". seriously. the childishness here is silly. If I wanted you to feel positively about me I would join the circle jerk.

                    1. sloopyinca   12 years ago

                      So you admit that there is no "Equal Protection Under The Law", and that police officers routinely treat other officers differently even when they commit felonies (DUI with a firearm on you is a felony).

                      Good to know.

                    2. Dunphy (the real one)   12 years ago

                      No, I admit that sometimes cops cut other cops a break. DUI with a firearm is a gross misdemeanor in my state (no extra penalty for carrying a firearm).

                      Is it a felony in that state?

                      But of course cops sometimes cut other cops a break. I've said that often.

          3. Gus   12 years ago

            "This just shows the difference between here and volokh.com"

            Then don't come here, pig.

            1. Dunphy (the real one)   12 years ago

              I love it here. I can out bigots and speak truth to power. I just recognize that I am dealing with children, when I interact with Sloopy et al and his ilk. But it's totally fun or I wouldn't be here. Volokh.com is for serious stuff, and reason.com is for fun

              1. Marshall Gill   12 years ago

                I can out bigots and speak truth to power

                Well, you at least have learned to write above a six year old level. Too bad you haven't learned to think past that.

                Truth to power? Hmm, which of us hold the power of violence over the others and which is completely full of shit?

                I would think eating floaters from a toilet bowl would be "serious stuff" for an imbecile like yourself.

                You don't deserve to die for being a shit-stain, but I would be much happier not reading your garbage, however that could occur.

      3. sloopyinca   12 years ago

        --"Deputy Mayor Lowell Stewart said Swenson was suspended on the advice of City Attorney Jeff Pederson until "resolution of the issues that are on the table."

        exactly. ONCE the case is resolved, then he gets punished.

        Which "case" are you referring to? The one for the crime he's been accused of? Or the probation violation he has to answer to? Or the original conviction? This piece of shit pig has a lot of balls in the air with the legal system. I just want to make sure we're talking about the same one.

        1. Dunphy (the real one)   12 years ago

          Either one. It hasn't been adjudicated on the criminal front yet. The article doesn't say if it has been determined as a probation violation. Generally speaking (Varies state to state) there are different standards of evidence. Iow, he can be found not guilty of the Assault IV but still be found guilty of the probation violation.

          he can also be fired, even if found not guilty, since again it's a different standard of evidence.

          Either way, the way due process works is that they put the cop on paid leave (usually) until the issues are adjudicated. They also set up a "chinese wall" between the admin investigation and the criminal investigation, especially since the dept investigation they can compel a statement about the Assault DV whereas in criminal court, they cant due to the 5th amendment

          Either way, there's no "issue" here. He's been ACCUSED of a crime and it needs to work its way through the system before he gets punished. They don't punish before the investigation is complete.

      4. The Last American Hero   12 years ago

        If I had a prior drug conviction, my employer would not hire me. If I got a DUI, I lose my job and have to go before a state board and defend my license. My job doesn't involve the authorized use of force.

        The standards applied to the King's men are considerably lower. Additionally, the unwillingness of the King's men to police their own and hold themselves to a higher standard is disgusting.

        1. Dunphy (the real one)   12 years ago

          The standards vary agency to agency. Most agencies I know will hire people with past MISDEMEANOR convictions depending on how long ago the convictions were and what type of offense.

          I've never heard of an officer being hired with a past drug conviction, though.

          I know officers who have admitted to past drug use and still gotten hired. They have a chart as to what disqualifies, it's based on the type of drug, the # of times used, and how long ago it happened.

          Most agencies are ok with marijuana use in the past as long as there were no sales of the drug and it happened more than X years ago. A few agencies will hire somebody who has used cocaine etc. in the past. Again, it varies agency to agency.

          1. RBS   12 years ago

            How do they feel about Tren?

            1. Dunphy (the real one)   12 years ago

              We have an officer who is a former high ranking (I think he was national champion) bodybuilder from some country in europe and he admitted to past AAS use and he got hired. Fwiw, they may not even have been a controlled substance in his country. In some countries they are OTC.

              In my state, possession is a misdemeanor and past use is acceptable (within certain limits) for applicants

  39. BigT   12 years ago

    A pharmaceutical company is betting on medical marijuana being used in treatments for diabetes, epilepsy, and colitis.

    Anyone else read that as coitus?

    1. Rich   12 years ago

      No.

      Anyone else read "latimes" as latrines?

      1. BigT   12 years ago

        There's a difference?

  40. Marc F Cheney   12 years ago

    Sens. Chuck Schumer (D-N.Y.) and Lindsey Graham (R-S.C.) have suggested

    Any time that prefaces a suggestion, you know to do the exact opposite.

    1. sloopyinca   12 years ago

      Isn't that one of the Signs of the Apocalypse I read about in the bible?

      1. The Immaculate Trouser   12 years ago

        But which one is the Whore of Babylon, and which the False Prophet?

  41. Gladstone   12 years ago

    Looks like Disney knows what they are going to do next summer:

    http://family-room.ew.com/2013.....star-wars/

  42. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

    Nick "Winters": Hey, wait a minute! This is the Nick "Winters" show, and I do the entertaining, thank you! Let's go out with something really hot for these folks, alright? A big hit on the '77. [ singing ] "Ah.. Star Wars! Nothing but Star Wars! Gimme those Star Wars.. don't let them end! Ah.. Star Wars! If they should bar wars.. please let these Star Wars stay-ay! And, hey! How about that nutty Star Wars bar? Can you forget all those creatures in there? And, hey! Darth Vader in that black and evil mask - did he scare you as much as he scared me-e-e-e?" [ turns and screams when he finds Paul the Pianist wearing a Darth Vader mask ] My seventh winter up here! [ singing ] "Star Wars-s-s-s!"

    1. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

      Sorry, responding to Gladstone.

    2. Hash Brown   12 years ago

      Please tell me you don't have that memorized.

      1. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

        No, but I do remember the first part all the way to "bar wars."

  43. Eduard van Haalen   12 years ago

    Meanwhile, the Cleveland Browns buy a coffin from those New Orleans coffin-making monks so they can finally bury that story that's been going all over the Internet about the fan.

  44. sloopyinca   12 years ago

    Police officer that used excessive force on a detained prisoner (felony recorded on tape!) and then lied about it to investigators (felony recorded on paper!) allowed to retire. And in case our resident super-cop is worried about his due process rights, never fear. He had already been punished...with a 2 week suspension.

    1. Dunphy (the real one)   12 years ago

      I see no mention in the link about the offense being a felony and lying to investigators in most states is at worse a misdemeanor.

      Where are you getting the felony stuff.

      2 week suspension is reasonable for a garden variety excessive force for an officer, assuming hes never had an excessive force complaint sustained before. That's about par for the course.

      1. sloopyinca   12 years ago

        Oh, so if I beat a handcuffed person and then lie to cover my tracks, I'll not get criminally charged by the cops when the video proves I was lying and that the assault took place?

        Your contortions are amazing!

        1. Dunphy (the real one)   12 years ago

          What are you talking about? You said it was a felony assault but the link you provided doesn't support that assertion.

          And again,. lying to investigators (depending on circumstances) is at worse a misdemeanor

          So, AGAIN - where does it say it was a felony assault?

          1. sloopyinca   12 years ago

            I thought any assault while armed (look at the video, moron) with a gun was a felony.

            Or does that only apply to "civilians" caught doing anything with a gun on their person?

            1. Dunphy (the real one)   12 years ago

              Not in my state it's not

              You simply don't know the law. Read the RCW (my state's law). There is no felony because you are armed.

              Does that state have such a charge?

              You simply don't understand the law but you think you do.

              And again, I'm not calling you a "moron" even though you are YET AGAIN wrong on the law

              1. sloopyinca   12 years ago

                It is the law in my state.

                1. Dunphy (the real one)   12 years ago

                  It very well may be, but the question is - is it the law in the state where the offense happened? You made that assumption

                  and please cite your state's law. That's interesting because it would make any assault by a police officer automatically a felony. I find that hard to believe but I am not at all saying it's not the case in your state

                  I have never seen a penal code that makes assault WHILE armed a felony. Many states make it a more serious charge if you do a burg or robbery while armed and of course assault WITH a firearm is a felony, but I;ll need to see the law you are referencing because that would be unique to me

  45. OldMexican   12 years ago

    Obama has said that "Trayvon Martin could have been me 35 years ago."

    Except that Trayvon was not born from a white slut nor was he a Muslim.

    Yuk-yuk-yuk.

    1. Killazontherun   12 years ago

      Sluts (or Rihanna's favored spelling 'slutz') are hands down (me trousers) my favorite people.

  46. sloopyinca   12 years ago

    This is the most vile person in the news today. And that's a tall order.

    FTA: Julio Cuevas Jr., the assistant district attorney who prosecuted the case, reminded Justice Nunez that Mr. Alicea's record included a previous violation of someone's constitutional rights just months before the arrests. In that earlier case, Mr. Alicea pleaded guilty to administrative charges of unlawfully entering and searching a Brooklyn home. He was transferred to Manhattan soon after.

    Here's another one for the cop fellators. Motherfucker breaks into someone's house and tosses it. He's convicted...in administrative court...and transferred to another precinct. And once he's there, he attempts to ruin someone's life by manufacturing evidence of a drug deal. He gets 6 months in that conviction, but the motherfucker should have been in prison for B&E, not still carrying a gun for the Crown.

    But that's what our parallel system of "due process" for cops gets us: administrative courts move them around instead of sending them to the state court for criminal trespass and B&E, which is where a "civilian" would have ended up had he done what this piece of shit cop did.

    Defend that, fuckface.

    1. Dunphy (the real one)   12 years ago

      Grow up and stop being a petulant child. Why would I defend misconduct?

      Your obsession is getting old.

      I don't know the case facts on the entry to know if it was warranted to be administratively charged or criminally charged. Case facts matter

      But framing somebody should get serious jail time.

      I don't like dirty cops any more than you do.

      1. sloopyinca   12 years ago

        I don't know the case facts on the entry to know if it was warranted to be administratively charged or criminally charged. Case facts matter

        He illegally broke into someone's home under color of law in order to search it. What more "facts" do you need? That's a fucking FELONY when a "civilian" does it, but when a NYPD cop does, he gets to go to admin court and gets transferred to another department because he''s not treated like the convict one of us would be treated like.

        But framing somebody should get serious jail time.

        Six whole months? Almost as long as Lindsay Lohan got for her drunk driving conviction...

        1. Dunphy (the real one)   12 years ago

          A "civilian" can;t "do it" because they aren;'t acting under color of law.

          What was his intent? Did he think it a lawful entry but was wrong on the law? etc.

          Those are major distinctions and under the law mens rea is a huge factor.
          I just charged a "B&E" yesterday as misdemeanor trespass because the suspect's INTENT was to retrieve the keys to her car. Iow, it wasn't a burglary even though she unlawfully entered a residence, because she didn't have the requisite intent.

          If he fucked up then of course he shouldn't be criminally charged with burglary. There's no analogy to 'civilian" actions because civilians don't enter homes under color of law to search them.

          Case facts matter. If he had no intent to commit a crime, but merely did an unlawful search then the trying in admin style is entirely warranted.

          Most cops have probably done an illegal search before without recognizing it.

          The problem with your "double standard" analogies are they are rarely analogous. If he broke into the home to steal something, he should be criminally charged with burg. If he entered the home THINKING he was legally justified but he was wrong on the case law that's entirely diferent.

          So, again, what are the case facts?

          1. sloopyinca   12 years ago

            Cops: not experts on the law as it applies to them, but experts on the law as it applies to YOU!

            [chuckles]

      2. sloopyinca   12 years ago

        I don't know the case facts on the entry to know if it was warranted to be administratively charged or criminally charged.

        I sure hope the next time I get accused of B&E, I get to go to auctioneer court where my coworkers and peers can punish me instead of the state court system.

        1. Dunphy (the real one)   12 years ago

          Again, case facts and mens rea matter.

          You don't understand the law and it continually makes you look ridiculous.

          Like the "assault while armed is a felony" thing which is not the law in MA HI or WA I can say with certainty.

          Your analogies are never analogous. If you get accused of B&E and you are entering to steal something that's entirely different than an unlawful search of a residence.

          Intent is important.

          1. sloopyinca   12 years ago

            If you get accused of B&E and you are entering to steal something that's entirely different than an unlawful search of a residence.

            They are both criminal. He was not treated as such because he is a cop and their CBA grants them a separate but equal system of justice not afforded "civilians".

            And it wasn't just an unlawful search. It was breaking into the house with the intent to commit an unlawful search. Get your facts straight, moron.

  47. Killazontherun   12 years ago

    Gay Satanist doing it on the graves of Fred Phelps' dead relatives.

    http://www.wwtdd.com/2013/07/s.....s-mom-gay/

  48. Entropy Void   12 years ago

    " ... No, Officer, I swear, I was just trying to re-charge your cellphone ..."

    Streaming media: New fuel cell powers a mobile phone with pee

    http://www.gizmag.com/bristol-.....4-90400361

  49. sloopyinca   12 years ago

    I'm tired of slapping our resident cop scholar around. Have a great weekend, all.*

    *Even you, Epi...you dick.

  50. Banjos   12 years ago

    If anyone gives a flying fuck, we are having another girl!

    1. Jeff   12 years ago

      And if you two would stop giving so many flying fucks maybe you wouldn't be having another kid every three goddamn seconds.

      (Congrats!)

    2. Hyperion   12 years ago

      Look, man. Little girls is da debil. You best be cranking out the only libertarian girls on the planet, besides Nicole, or we are are going to delete all your posts from H$R.

      BTW, we need some scathingly severe and witty anti big government posts, right here, from the first munchkin, by the time of her 3rd birthday.

      Don't push it, mister!

  51. Dunphy (the real one)   12 years ago

    Sloopy: "I thought any assault while armed (look at the video, moron) with a gun was a felony."

    I'd really love to see that law. Note assault WITH a deadly weapon means you used the weapon in the crime and is a felony. That's not the same as assault WHILE armed which is not a felony in any jurisdiction I am aware of, but could be in yours if supported by a cite

  52. Omni   12 years ago

    Gotta throw this in there...

    MSNBC's Melissa Harris-Perry on Detroit's Problems: "This is what it looks like when government is small enough to drown in your bathtub."

    Small government killed Detroit apparently

    1. Hyperion   12 years ago

      Oh yeah. Government is really small. So small, that's it only managed to rack up 16.9 trillion in debt.

      The IRS, EPA, FDA, NSA, TSA, DHS, DEA, etc., etc., etc... that's all just a figment of your imagination. It's so small, I don't even notice that it exists.

    2. Gorilla tactics   12 years ago

      Fuckin unreal

    3. VG Zaytsev   12 years ago

      MSNBC's Melissa Harris-Perry on Detroit's Problems: "This is what it looks like when government is small enough to drown in your bathtub."

      And she's a tenured university professor.

  53. prolefeed   12 years ago

    Tumblr has rendered its sexually oriented blogs unsearchable, which will affect about 10 percent of content.

  54. prolefeed   12 years ago

    Tumblr has rendered its sexually oriented blogs unsearchable, which will affect about 10 percent of content.

    Checked my bookmarked Tumblr sites, all of which are still working. Unless a BJ site like lipwrapped.tumblr.com is somehow considered not sexually oriented, I don't know what the hell they're talking about.

    1. Jordan   12 years ago

      Unsearchable != unreachable

  55. GILMORE   12 years ago

    Obama has said that "Trayvon Martin could have been me 35 years ago"

    Really? Given his trigger-happiness acing people with Drones, I wonder if he'd think the same of this guy =

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/.....87550.html

    Witnesses testified that Tyson told them he saw two "crackers" ? a derogatory term for white people ? walking through the neighborhood and that he intended to rob them. The tourists said they didn't have any money and begged Tyson to let them go home. The men also told Tyson they were lost.

    "Since you ain't got no money, then I have something for your ass," Tyson recounted to a witness, then added that he shot the men several times

    It is noted = this happened shortly after the "trayvon coulda been my son" comment. Parents of the slain students demanded a comment from Obama. None ever came. Nor was the story widely covered in the US, but was a major headline in the UK.

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new.....ssion.html

    ".Mr Davies said: 'We would like to publicly express our dissatisfaction at the lack of any public or private message of support or condolence from any American governing body or indeed, President Obama himself.

    'Mr Kouzaris has written to President Obama on three separate occasions and is yet to even receive the courtesy of a reply."

  56. Episiarch   12 years ago

    I won't be until later. Unfortunately some of us have to work.

  57. Fist of Etiquette   12 years ago

    After your shift at McDonalds. Good thinking.

  58. Episiarch   12 years ago

    They let me eat as many fries as I want! It's awesome!

  59. The DerpRider   12 years ago

    The Michigan one is fine. The fiasco will be in L.A.

  60. Warrren   12 years ago

    And that's why you take up two seats on the bus.

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