Regulation

Brickbat: Oh, What a World!

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Swaziland's Civil Aviation Authority has threatened to fine witches who fly their broomsticks higher than 150 meters. An official with the agency said broomsticks are covered by the same law that bans kites and toy helicopters from flying too high. A local newspaper said it wasn't clear if he was being serious.

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  1. The official went on to say he also banned the turning of people into newts.

    1. just in time for sweeps!

    2. Even if they get better?

  2. So, it’s still okay for non-witches to fly broomsticks higher than 150 feet?

    1. No, the union rules take care of that. Even the government won’t fuck with the witches’ union.

  3. a propos of nothing

    King of Swaziland wants to make me his (14th) virgin bride… so you must let me stay in the UK: Woman’s plea for asylum after fleeing African monarch

    Some saucy NSFW photos, for those worried about such things

    1. Dems some bouncy black titties. Very bouncy.

      1. Watch out, sarcasmic. Remember what happened to Don Imus?

  4. Oh, what a world, what a world.

      1. This isn’t really a brickbat so why should I bring my A game.

        1. or your little dog?

        2. Well, technically, you brought Charles Oliver’s A-game.

          1. aiming low again

  5. It’s all those teenage witches just getting their licenses that don’t pay attention to their altitude that ruin it for the rest of us.

    1. Does this mean my Dyson needs to be registered as a motor vehicle?

  6. Sometimes man, you just gotta roll with it dude.

    http://www.Prox-Anon.tk

  7. I assume you anarchist libertardians think that witches should be able to fly anywhere they like. Without common sense witch aviation regulations such as this, there’d be a huge increase in mid-air witch collisions and one of these potioned-up broomjockeys will end up killing innocent people. It’s rock-solid government science that says flying a broomstick above 150 feet is [half understood misspelled legal Latin] evidence of impairment. The skies are supposed to be clear for drones to bring eyeball-melting freedom fire down on any car full of people a foreign government points a finger at, especially if it’s full of guests attending a child’s wedding.

    1. I thought we were against child marriage, did I miss a memo?

    2. The Government builds ROADZZZ for a reason, and society doesn’t need you crazy libertarians and your enchanted flying equipment mucking up the system with your off-grid solutions that just sap resources from our state-funded projects.

    3. science that says flying a broomstick above 150 feet is [half understood misspelled legal Latin] evidence of impairment.

      I lol’ed

      1. I suggest “upso facto” [sic] or “prima pluribus unum.”

        1. res ipsa chiquita

          1. On second thought the phrase that’s needed here is clearly “primo facial.”

            1. Inter arma silent leggings.

            2. Excellent, X.

  8. You know, everyone talks about witch safety, but it’s nice to see someone doing something about it.

    I frankly think we ought to follow their example. We need to spend six months intently hammering out the details of a magical aviation safety bill. This needs to be the exclusive priority of the Congress. Please write your congressmen and insist that they drop everything else to focus on this important issue.

    1. You laugh but I actually had a constituent call the office one time to complain about the witches in her neighborhood.

      1. I’m completely serious. I want Congress to tackle magical aviation regulation and I want them to take all the time needed to get it exactly right.

        1. I’m sure there is it at least one member who would take up the cause. I mean, everyone thinks all congressmen are as brilliant as the ones on tv…

          1. Until Guam is stable, the witches are gonna have to wait.

    2. Senator Nuwan Blumenthal, in a press conference today, stated, “This bill enables my colleagues to put their money where their mouths have been,” Blumenthal said in a statement. “For those of my colleagues ?[who] failed to vote for common sense broomstick safety measures in March, this bill gives them the opportunity to make a down payment ? not a full payment ? but a down payment on their obligation to respond adequately to the Seteki horror.”

  9. Looks like my ex-wife is going to have to hire someone to sweep her hill-top villa! AM I RIGHT FELLAS?

  10. FTFA: Swazi brooms are short bundles of sticks tied together and do not have handles. Swazi witches are known to use them to fling potions about homesteads ? but not for transport.

    So, not serious.

  11. “A local newspaper said it wasn’t clear if he was being serious.”

    Hmmm, what’s your best guess?

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