Friday Funnies

Obama and oil

Henry Payne | 10.19.2012 7:30 AM

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Fist of Etiquette 13 years ago

Obama shouldn't ride Cadillac One with the donut. It's only meant to be a temporary spare.
The Craig 13 years ago

I wonder if Shreek will be by to post another Politifact article that proves himself wrong.
Longtorso 13 years ago

Labels, now with pronunciation guides, so you can get the wordplay in a cartoon.
1. LTC(ret) John 13 years ago
  
  Payne was jealous of Bok's label-fu.
Longtorso 13 years ago

Thanks for the vanity license plate to cover the fact you're too bad of an artist to draw Obama in a way that he's recognizable as Obama.
Whiterun Guard 13 years ago

Wait, whose car is that?
SIV 13 years ago

Needs moar Jackie climbing on the trunk.
1. WTF 13 years ago
  
  You'll get a visit from the Secret Service with comments like that.
2. Jesus H. Christ 13 years ago
  
  Ouch.
  
  Bad week?
Bee Tagger 13 years ago

If he really wanted to win the Southern vote he's change his license plate to read: Al Obama.
1. Whiterun Guard 13 years ago
  
  Or just G. Obama
  1. Fist of Etiquette 13 years ago
    
    After his half-brother?
    1. Whiterun Guard 13 years ago
      
      Racist!
2. ant1sthenes 13 years ago
  
  Or shorten it to 'Bama.
  1. Jesus H. Christ 13 years ago
    
    ^^^^^^
  2. Sam Grove 13 years ago
    
    How 'bout "Ala Bama"
Whiterun Guard 13 years ago

I have a Far Side daily calendar on my desk that is now sliding towards the monitor. The black hole of funny is drawing other semi-funny stuff towards it to annihilate it in a singularity.*

*Of course it will be released over the eons as Fry-radiation
1. Flatulent Monkey 13 years ago
  
  So, the two single pane comics annihilate when they come in contact?
mr simple 13 years ago

Oh, burn! What a take down of the administration. I bet everyone who sees this decides to vote against Obama.
1. Whiterun Guard 13 years ago
  
  There's no box on the ballot that says "Against Obama"
  1. mr simple 13 years ago
    
    You already have copies of your states ballot? Voter fraud!
    1. Whiterun Guard 13 years ago
      
      Actually I do, I'm an absentee (non)voter for Florida.
  2. db 13 years ago
    
    I should have legally changed my name to this a year ago. I'd win in a landslide.
  3. Auric Demonocles 13 years ago
    
    A very sad issue with our election system.
  4. Nelson 13 years ago
    
    Actually, there is. Republicans hate Obama so much that they secretly pushed for laws mandating that an "Against Obama" box be put on the ballot.
invisible furry hand 13 years ago

Whoever pimped the presidential ride did a lousy job
Longtorso 13 years ago

Why does Obama's car have roller skate wheels? Is Payne an obese shut in who has never seen a car and draws cartoons based on what he sees on news channels while flipping between the various home shopping networks?
1. TheSpiteHouse 13 years ago
  
  So did you like the cartoon?
sarcasmic 13 years ago

This cartoon is just more proof that John is right when he says that Matt Welch loathes Romney.
sloopyinca 13 years ago

So Banjos and I went to see "Atlas Shrugged: Part II" last night. It was so horribly done that I can't even offer up much of a review. If the acting in the first one was suspect, it was downright awful here. And d'Anconia's money speech was chopped down to a few quips that lacked any of it's intended impact.

About halfway through, I told Banjos that if they wanted to do justice for "Part III," they would scrap using actors altogether and do the movie in claymation. It would keep with the trajectory of the production quality and acting ability from I to II. Sad, really, as I was looking forward to it going in the other direction.
1. $park? 13 years ago
  
  I'm still wondering why anyone would read that book and then think it would be a good idea to make into a movie.
  1. sloopyinca 13 years ago
    
    Steven Spielberg and Roy Scheider disagree.
    1. Whiterun Guard 13 years ago
      
      I read that as Steven Spielberg is Roy Scheider in disguise.
      
      I am hung over.
2. LTC(ret) John 13 years ago
  
  Thanks sloopy - My laughter at the claymation riff counteracted the unfuniness of the cartoon.
3. Fatty Bolger 13 years ago
  
  I said local dinner theater actors. But claymation - that's awesome.
  1. Whiterun Guard 13 years ago
    
    I'd watch the Lego version.
    1. Almanian's Evil Twin 13 years ago
      
      Lego Bible is the best thing EVAR. And since "Atlas Shrugged" is about the same length as the bible, it also translates well.
      
      Good call!
4. Loki 13 years ago
  
  if they wanted to do justice for "Part III," they would scrap using actors altogether and do the movie in claymation
  
  Maybe they could use action figures, Robot Chicken style.
Fatty Bolger 13 years ago

Oh, so the black man got to be riding in a Cadillac, huh? Payne, you racist muthafucka!
1. gaijin 13 years ago
  
  where does it say cadillac? some folks need labels I guess.
  1. sloopyinca 13 years ago
    
    I think the Presidential Limo has always been done under the label of an American manufacturer. I can't remember seeing anything other than a Caddy or a Lincoln.
    
    And that's a shame, because I think we'd have had a better class of despot if we'd let them ride in the back of a Mercedes 600 Pullman.
    1. Auric Demonocles 13 years ago
      
      What's the point of being the world's sole superpower if we don't have our leader drive around in their best car? Isn't the point of having a military this much more powerful than everyone else's to loot their best stuff?
    2. Mensan 13 years ago
      
      Tangent: FDR had the first armored limo, which the Secret Service started using following the attack on Pearl Harbor. It was an armored 1928 Cadillac that Treasury had seized from Al Capone.
      1. Auric Demonocles 13 years ago
        
        See, that's a start, but we can do better. Our presidents should be driving around in cars seized from Saddam.
  2. Fist of Etiquette 13 years ago
    
    First comment. Duh-doy.
  3. Almanian's Evil Twin 13 years ago
    
    Cadillac taillights - duh! Lincoln's rear lights are completely different.
    
    /car guy
  4. Loki 13 years ago
    
    The elongated taillights are a dead giveaway.
sloopyinca 13 years ago

I love how you guys are all worried about what size of tire he's rolling with. Not a single one of you noticed they were actually magnets for his Solyndra-designed mag-lev hovercraft.
1. $park? 13 years ago
  
  It also seems to be spewing out the broken hearts of disappointed young voters.
  1. sloopyinca 13 years ago
    
    I thought they were dried horse turds. I suppose we're both correct.
H. Reardon 13 years ago

Nurse: On a scale of 1 to 10, how bad is the Payne?

Me: 10 *gasp* 10!
1. Whiterun Guard 13 years ago
  
  Oh god, it's catching!
2. Auric Demonocles 13 years ago
  
  If you don't say 11 or higher they know you're fine.
  1. H. Reardon 13 years ago
    
    I'll live, but they may have to remove the portion of my brain that recognizes humor. Wait...do libertarians have that part of their brain? I think, perhaps, I've misjudged Payne all along.
3. Mensan 13 years ago
  
  Nobody ever says 10 except for people who don't appear to be in any pain at all. Even drug-seekers consistently say 7 or 8.
  1. Auric Demonocles 13 years ago
    
    I said 12 once. My sister still picks on me about it, but I got my sweet revenge when they discovered my IV was kinked and they gave me the morphine.
  2. Zeb 13 years ago
    
    Well, you have to save 10 for a special occasion.
Almanian's Evil Twin 13 years ago

If I were sage, I would say, "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
WTF 13 years ago

Yeah, but you have to admit it's not a very high bar.
$park? 13 years ago

Friday Funnies are put out first thing Friday morning to prevent anybody from getting into too good of a mood.

You see, generally Friday is a happy day for people being the end of the work week. Libertarians are not used to being happy, therefore "cartoons" of this stunning quality are put out to engender the greatest amount of disgust and apathy that can be carried through the day.
$park? 13 years ago

And with a giant *poof* yet another apparent troll gets obliterated by the reason squirrels.
Longtorso 13 years ago

FF is part of our ritual self-mortification, to deny The Flesh so we can live out the pure logic of libertarian belief. Think of it as a hair shirt done in pen and ink, and a weekly reminder that "Life is pain. Anyone who tells you otherwise is trying to sell you something". Pain = Payne. How much more obvious can we get?

The first truth is that life is suffering i.e., life includes pain, getting old, disease, and ultimately death. We also endure psychological suffering like loneliness frustration, fear, embarrassment, disappointment and anger. This is an irrefutable fact that cannot be denied. It is realistic rather than pessimistic because pessimism is expecting things to be bad. lnstead, Buddhism explains how suffering can be avoided and how we can be truly happy.
Nelson 13 years ago

I disagree with some of the details in your post. Libertarians have these cartoons produced as a means to lower the quality of life for all others to their level. Equality is the key word here.
sloopyinca 13 years ago

a giant *poof*

I'm glad Mary's gone again, but I don't think Perez Hilton had anything to do with it.
$park? 13 years ago

The Internet is a wild and mystical place. One can never be completely sure how things happen in Internetland.
LTC(ret) John 13 years ago

Zing!
Longtorso 13 years ago

So essentially, the FF is a blow against Evangelical Christianity, in attempt to lure people away from that and into either atheistic libertarianism, Catholic self whipping rituals, or Buddhism.

Does that make sense? Does that make more sense than the actual cartoons?
invisible furry hand 13 years ago

can you get this into a snappy one-liner that would fit on a t-shirt?
$park? 13 years ago

I find your rambling to be very elucidating, and completely full of shit.
$park? 13 years ago

Life is pain, Friday Funnies show the way.
sloopyinca 13 years ago

Wouldn't it be "Friday Funnies shows the way"? Friday Funnies is a singularity, not a group of individual events. It's like the essence of HyR.
LTC(ret) John 13 years ago

So it is Lesser Way Friday Funnism?
$park? 13 years ago

Clearly this "comic" is only a single panel, making it a Friday Funny. Funnies is plural because it is inflicted every Friday. Tard.
Longtorso 13 years ago

Can anyone read a Payne cartoon and not doubt the existence of God?

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