European Union

Merkel Concedes to the PIGS and Accepts Bailout Agreement


Angela Merkel has appeased other European leaders, and the markets, by agreeing to a plan that aims to tackle the eurozone crisis. The plan, backed by Italy, Spain, and France, allows for rescue funds to remain available for banks without constituent nations having to impose austerity measures. In Germany the press has spun the agreement as a defeat, with Merkel being portrayed as having conceding too much to Spain and Italy in particular.

The current bailout mechanism, the European Financial Stability Facility, will continue to provide relief until the introduction of the recently proposed European Stability Mechanism that will be launched next month. Under the new proposals not only will funds be available to banks regardless of the behavior of the countries they happen to be in, but the funds may now be used to by bonds.

The Germans, Dutch, and Finns had been pushing against these sorts of proposals. However, Merkel's concession looks like the beginning of the end of the anti-bailout rhetoric. The only hint at good news is that under the new agreement banks, no countries will receive funds. The worst news is that plans are in place for there to eventually be a closer and more unified union, something welcomes by most European politicians.  

The markets reacted positively to the news and borrowing costs for Italy and Spain have dropped. However, optimism may be short lived if Spanish and Cypriot bailouts do not have their desired effect and the plans cannot get implemented within the next few months.

It is not hard to understand why Merkel is now embarking on a damage control tour. The agreement unsurprisingly fails to take into account any moral responsibility. The bond agreement means that Germans will now bear similar burdens as the Greeks, Spaniards, and Italians. With debt no longer considered a national responsibility fiscal union looks increasingly likely.

If you have a moment (and a stiff drink to hand) you can read the agreement here

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  1. And when they have stolen all of Germany’s money then what?

    1. 1. Print MORE money
      2. Lend to bereft nations
      3. ????
      4. PROFIT!!

    2. IIRC, the Germans handle hyperinflation pretty reasonably.

  2. CAPTION: “I am holdink…my breath…und you….kannot make us…to lent…zee money….PFFFFFFFFFFF OK…..”

    PS You said “stiff” – huh huh, huh huh, huh huh…

  3. This is going to turn out well.

    1. The last time the Germans got stabbed in the back by their political leaders, they didn’t take it too well.

      1. What?

        You mean last year when they bailed out Greece?

        They seemed to take that pretty well.

        1. A fair point. The Germans actually have some knives in their back this time, unlike when they made a big fuss about the fictional knives back, oh, last century sometime.

        2. I think John means when they accepted the terms of The Treaty of Versailles. Both John and I expect a fellow named Hister to come along any minute now and plunge the planet into World War III. Don’t laugh. The end is nigh.

  4. I had hopes for Merkel. I guess politicians are the same everywhere.

  5. I have an idea. Let’s give the Germans a legitimate grievance about the rest of Europe that they are, for the moment, powerless to do anything about. Let’s let that fester. That worked so well before, didn’t it?

    1. Yep, I am sure the next election will fix that powerlessness thing.

    2. And lets make them transfer billions of dollars in wealth to other countries in Europe. We will call it reparations I mean stability payments.

      Trust me Pro. The Germans will take it better this time.

    3. Yes, yes, brilliant! Make it so that the Germans wind up having to pay other countries as the result of a treaty. Make it so they wind up paying so much, their only option is to inflate the currency that they’re using. Top notch, Pro Lib!

      1. Somewhere, a little corporal is nursing his grievances…..

      2. I understand that it’s called the Dolchsto?legende Plan.

    4. Nah, they’ll have no money left to re-build the Wehrmacht by the time the rest of Europe is done sucking them dry.

      1. They somehow managed before. And that was after a the worst hyper inflation in known history.

        1. They are resourceful when they’re agitated, I’ll give them that.

          1. They really are. The British and the Russians stole everything. Yet, West Germany still rebuilt its economy after the war quicker than France or Germany.

            I have a lot of friends in Germany. They are all hard working responsible people who save and live very responsibly. To see those swine loot their country makes me sick.

            1. Yes, in all seriousness, I hope the German people don’t accept this and tell the EU to fuck off. The world has become a whole bunch of parasites, with only a few hosts to feed off of. Time for the hosts to inoculate.

              1. I hope they revolt. Europe has had revolutions before. It is due for another round. I want to hear American liberals have to condemn popular revolts.

      2. They’ll run their invasion on anger. It can work. Especially against the Rest of Europe.

        1. I wonder, would Uncle Sugar intervene?

          1. Europe would be a much better place if the non-German portions were more…German.

            1. Know who else thought Europe would be a better place if non-German portions were German?

              1. Odoacer?

          2. What’s important is that, this time, Germany should invade while retaining a republican system of government and refraining from any serious atrocities, dealings with the Mexican government, or killing of American citizens. If it does that, there won’t be any bad guys for us to fight, and we can sit out and sell them all weapons or something. Mmmm, blessed neutrality.

            1. DON’T MENTION THE WAR

              1. It’s not war, it’s WORLD STIMULUS 3.

              2. I mentioned it once, but I think I got away with it all right.

                1. Oh, German. I’m sorry, I thought there was something wrong with you.

                  1. Is there something wrong?

                    1. :Germany surrenders to France:

                    2. That just can’t be right.

                    3. Me? You started it!

                    4. Yes, you did. You invaded Poland!

      3. They’ll have plenty once the go back on the D-mark.

    5. Well, at least they have a lot of industrial capacity that will be left underutilized as the economy melts down. No idea what they could do with it, though…

  6. Merkel won’t be chancellor much longer.

    1. No, f?hrer is next, right?

    2. The problem is that all the other viable alternatives are even more enthusiastic about shoveling the money to spendthrift countries. Maybe a challenger within her own party?

      1. There is a solution. Total, absolute, and complete unification. One European government with absolute control over the treasury and over spending.

        Any candidates advocating more, not less, EU?

        1. Just the bureaucrats in Brussels

        2. There is a solution. Total, absolute, and complete unification. One European government with absolute control over the treasury and over spending.

          What could -possibly- go wrong?

          1. It could work if a sane system were adopted. One where orders were obeyed.

            1. Because central planning worked -so- well for Soviet Russia.

              1. Orders weren’t obeyed. Europe needs leadership whose orders will be obeyed without question.

                1. Dare I say… Drones!?

        3. Some are trying that with their “Eurobond” scheme.

          1. The problem with a single European government is that it would likely be run like the worst of the individual states that comprise it. It’s not like they’d drop the socialism or fiscal insanity.

            1. This. The Greeks and the Italians aren’t going to change their stripes anytime soon.

              1. I think Germany should foreclose on Europe. No wars, no violence, just a foreclosure action. Then it can control spending.

                1. Little eviction signs on the Parthenon, I like it.

              2. Will the French change the yellow stripe up their backs?

            2. Let’s not forget that socialism was originally a German idea.

              Wonder if the Finns abandon this stupid union or not.

  7. Feeney, you can do better with your alt-text.

    1. Well normally I’d say that face is punchable, but in this case it looks like that face has been punched.

  8. You dumb bitch. You’re done. Whatever political profit there was to be had from your earlier (totally justified) intransigence is gone. Vaporized. You will lose the next election because you just terminated your raison d’etre.

    If the Free Liberals are too gormless to use this moment, they deserve to die.

    1. I’m sure Chief Justice John Roberts can help.

  9. German politics just got interesting again.

    1. A nice big war in Europe that we stay out of. After it’s over, we sell them stuff. Now that is a stimulus plan.

      1. A war in Europe brought us out of a depression once, why not twice?

        1. We can also profit mightily as a neutral. Selling all sorts of stuff, including weapons to all belligerents, then selling stuff to them after the war. We’ll make trillions.

          1. Yeah, as if our government could stay out of it. Are you serious? They can’t even stay out of shitholes like Libya. You think they could resist a European conflict?

            1. Well, then we need a new government. Is there a neutrality party I can join?

              1. Fry: Now here’s a party I can get excited about. Sign me up!

                Voter Apathy Party Man: Sorry, not with that attitude.

                Fry: Okay then, screw it.

                Voter Apathy Party Man: Welcome aboard, brother!

                Fry: All right!

                Voter Apathy Party Man: You’re out.

            2. No Epi. Someone might have fun at a European war. We only go to war in complete and total shit holes. Europe is way to nice to warrant US intervention.

              1. Post-war Paris is usually nice.

                1. As long as the Germans don’t bomb Pearl Harbor again

        2. Krugabe is creaming his pants right now. No austerity AND disgruntled Germans stoking the future possibility of WORLD STIMULUS III.

          1. With possible nuclear stimulus, which means a shitload of broken windows.

            1. Fuckin’ A! Our economy is saved!

              1. I thought Krugabe wanted us to fight the aliens?

      2. After it’s over, we sell them stuff.

        Can’t we sell them stuff before during and after?

        1. Yes, I mention that somewhere else in this totally absurd and offensive-to-Germans thread.

  10. Wow. How breathtakingly stupid. I dont even know what to say.

    Fuckem, let them sink.

    1. Suthenboy, they got fucked by their leader. The German people will NOT like this, nor will they take kindly to the person who did it to them.

      1. The Germans are a bunch of pussies now.

        They’ll take it good and hard and half of em will chatter about how great it is.

  11. You know who else….

    Oh. I see you all covered it earlier.

    Never mind.

    1. I figured it’s Friday, and Mike’s probably not reading this thread, anyway. So fuck it, let’s go Nazi.

      1. You know who ELSE went NAZI??!!!1!

          1. Uh, oh, not them, too. All the old bad guys are coming back.

          2. Do un-Aryan nazis get to exterminate themselves?

        1. The Republican Irish?

    2. This far and not one centimenter furher!

  12. Note to self: If I ever want to mug Germany all I need to do is put a gun to my own head.

    “Gimmi the money or he gets it.”

    1. Do vhat he say! Do vhat he say!

  13. The BBC link goes to a story about Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes.

    1. Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes make more fiscal sense than what just happened in Europe.

    2. Do you think the contract had a term, and it just expired?

  14. OT: Remember when all we had to worry about was MOOOZLIMSZZ!!1! building mosques?
    ‘Member that?

    Good times, good times…

    1. Well now we get to find out if the Germans really have mentally neutered themselves or if all that sub-conscious national identity stuff is going to come bubbling up after six decades of repression.

  15. This the day after they lost to the Italians in the Euros. Not only will the Italians be taking the German’s spot in the finals, they will be relieving the Germans of their wallets as well.

    Now that is a two day nut punch.

  16. Just as a side note: Has anyone performed any study on how much wealthier the world would be if it weren’t for World War 2?

    1. I’ve wondered where we’d be if the two world wars hadn’t happened at all. Massive setbacks from those wars, no doubt.

      1. Europe would still be ruled by Victoria’s great great inbred grandchildren and 8 billion Chinese would be selling us stuff.

  17. The original ESM hasn’t even been ratified yet and they’re already making changes?

    Won’t matter much since the German courts probably won’t accept it constitutionally anyway, unless Roberts has an influence.

    On the other hand, the more Europe behaves like this, the better it is for the US economy. Unfortunately the US will try to keep pace with Europe.

    1. We could’ve taken advantage of Europe’s illness to have a huge economic boom. Instead, we’re doubling down on stupid.

      1. I have thought about that. Just imagine if we hadn’t done TARP or the porkulus or obamacare and just let things work themselves out. I am not talking Libertopia. Just Bush era deficits and a generally do nothing Congress. We would be in the midst of a real recovery and the dollar would be worth like two Euros.

        1. Pretty much. And if we’d adopted spending and regulatory reform, we’d be kicking serious economic ass.

          1. Completely unfounded speculation.

            I can speculate too: if the stimulus had been twice as big, we’d be in robust growth by now. What’s the difference? Mine has the support of credible economists.

            1. Like Krugabe?

      2. It was our own penis envy over the EU and Japanese mega-banks that caused things like Glass-Stegall to be repealed and the creation of Too Big To Fail banks in the US.

        Can’t wait for the Chase/RBS merger.

      3. Why is stupid always doubled down on? What is the lunatic attraction to it?

        1. Have you ever seen intelligent mob action?

  18. The problem for Germany is that their economy is heavily dependent on exports facilitated by the EU and the euro. They can’t just take their ball and go home. Trying to sell shit to people suddenly reduced to paying with drachmas, liras, and pesetas would be interesting, to say the least.

    1. So you’re saying the Euro IS a suicide pact, unlike the Constitution.

    2. Selling to people who are paying you with your money doesn’t sound like much of an alternative.

      1. And they aren’t even paying in full.

  19. Unfortunately, she is no Maggie Thatcher.

  20. Jesus, after getting the great national shame of losing to the daygos in yesterday’s Euro Championship match, no they have to endure bailing out the smelly gumbas? Fuck Merkel, way to shoot yourself in the foot.

  21. One thing’s for sure: England’s got to be happy they have some political independence from this fiasco.

  22. Do you suppose the Germans are starting to feel nostalgic?

  23. “Look, Ange. You can’t afford anymore inter-party bickering. If you take our side then the rest of Europe will stop hating you and go back to blaming America and China and OPEC for all the problems. It’s the one thing all the parties in Germany agree upon. This is your best shot at saving yourself politically. You don’t want to lose your pension, do you?”

  24. Good. Now we need to have fiscal union on this side of the ocean too.

  25. So what are the positions of the Social Democrats, the Left and the Greens? That Germany should give out more money?

  26. After they lost to the Italians in the semis she pretty much didn’t have a choice.

  27. Now i’m hearing that merkel agreed to this if the piigs implement a Tobin Tax.

    That oughta speed up their demise.

  28. It’s amazing to me that the Germans were so ashamed of the third reich, even half a century later, that they tolerate the fourth reich.

    Someday, they’re going to get sick of paying for other people’s profligacy, and they’re going to go back to the Deutschmark. When they do, all hell will break loose.


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