Public Health The War on Lemonade Stands! Nanny of the Month (June 2011)


Take a moment, this Fourth of July weekend, to think about what truly represents freedom: Old Glory, the Liberty Bell, and an ice-cold glass of lemonade.

This month's lineup of busybodies includes two regulars: the FDA, which is slapping new, more graphic, possibly counterproductive, warning labels on cigarette packs and the goldfish grabbers on San Francisco's Animal Control and Welfare Commission.

But top dishonors go to the sour bureaucrat who put the squeeze on a group of kids for running a lemonade stand. Sure they were raising money for a worthy cause (pediatric cancer research), but they were doing it without a permit, and that's why they got slapped with a $500 fine.

Presenting's Nanny of the Month for June 2011: Jennifer Hughes of Montgomery County, Maryland's Department of Permitting Services!

The episode sparked so much outrage that the county eventually backed off, but this is no isolated incident. Across America, the permit police are cracking down on pint-sized peddlers of liquid freedom. 

Just over one-minute long.

"Nanny of the Month" is written and produced by Ted Balaker. Opening animation by Meredith Bragg.

Go here to watch past "Nanny of the Month" episodes.

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  1. But top dishonors go to the sour bureaucrat who put the squeeze on a group of kids for running a lemonade stand. Sure they were raising money for a worthy cause (pediatric cancer research), but they were doing it without a permit, and that’s why they got slapped with a $500 fine.

    Happy “Independence” Day!!!

    1. Next time, a 3 a.m. door-buster.

      1. That’s what I was thinking…they call this a raid and no one got so much as a rifle butt in the cheek? Pussies.

        1. We’ll have to shoot the pet bunny to show we mean business.

  2. I thought it was spelled “Independents”

  3. I wonder what Cave Johnson would have to say about this.

    1. Burn his goddamn house down!

    2. Probably “We’re done here.”

  4. Just over one-minute long.

    That’s just over one minute too long!

  5. I did it for the children.

  6. I don’t know if anybody looked at the “goldfish grabbers” link, but also in the same column is a story that talks about some middleschoolers making a movie. Apparently, one of the scenes involved guns. The article says the Police confiscated what turned out to be “a very real – but unloaded – .22-caliber sawed-off shotgun.”

    I’m not a gun guy, but that doesn’t make any sense to me. Would one of you gun guys know if this is an actual weapon?

    1. .22 is a rimfire cartridge and not a shotshell. So I think they dun goofed.

    2. You mean reporters in San Francisco don’t know a damned thing about guns (other than they’re bad and should be banned, obviously)? I’m shocked!

    3. They are idiots – it’s a 22 gauge shotgun.

      1. Oops, I’m the idiot – lol. Looks like there are shotguns that have the same (or similar) bore sizes to a .22…

        1. Doesn’t matter… it was a gun, and children should never be able to own them when they grow up.

          1. But it’s perfectly okay before then?

    4. There are .22 rimfire shells with a small amount very small #12 shot that are used for indoor trap ranges or shooting small amimals inside buildings. They are meant to be used with specialty smooth bore .22 shotguns.

      I have my doubts that anyone would make a .22 sawed off shotgun out of one. Would you have a need to conceal one from a mouse until you were close enough to fire?

      Here is an article about a modern one that uses a more powerful .22 magnum shot shell:
      Marlin’s “Garden Gun”….._59281208/

  7. I don’t know about this one. Apparently the stand in question was pretty big and fairly sophisticated. It wasn’t little Sally Jane in her front yard with a pitcher and some paper cups.

    1. Which has no relevance to the question of if a permit should be required to sell lemonade.

      1. Sure it does. A 500 square foot tent with tables and chairs is not the same as a kid behind a card table.

        1. Tony would agree. We simply can’t have anyone selling that much unregulated lemonade.

        2. If it’s entirely contained on your property, and not having any serious consequences on your neighbors, then it doesn’t.

  8. seriously, what the f@ck is wrong with some people!!?

  9. Bye-bye, America the freeman’s republic, and hello to the de facto unitary authoritarian faux-democracy!

  10. They should also “waive” the incompetent, idiotic,inspector’s job.

  11. Isn’t San Francisco in every one of these?

    1. I’m pretty sure that’s a point of pride for San Francisco legislators, and even more disturbingly, most of its population.

  12. Good ole’ Montgomery County at it again.

  13. Quit your bitching, anarchists. This is a good example of why we need big government.

    1. You are a loyal minion, Tony.

  14. > they were raising money for a worthy cause

    Insidious language. What worthier cause has a lemonade stand than to put money in kids’ pockets? What they do with it afterwards is their nevermind; to suggest it matters whether they’re buying candy or cancer research (or burning the bills to make an artistic statement) is to undermine the moral right of all of us to enjoy the fruits of our own labor.

    1. Way to raise a new crop of capitalist-pig Christ-fags.

      1. How did Jesus have anything to do with that statement?

        I’ll answer my own question: absolutely nothing. Next time, try something other that epithets to attack someone.

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  16. Where are the days kids could just be free to try and make some money and practise their business skills.


    1. There’s the problem, letting kids learn how to make money without the Gov. might lead to capitalism.

  17. They pushed the envelope too far, just for a lemonade stand hold by kids!!

    I think those nannies should read the following book

  18. @ IceTrey
    Please kill yourself.

  19. Thanks for the best was very useful for me.keep sharing such ideas in the future as well.

  20. I sold shit in school.. made enough cash to buy me a guitar. Everyone’s happy. I agree though, you should have a permit if you’re going to sell lemonade.

  21. Thank you for sharing this information, hope you can often see after the information, get more people to useful things.

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