If I Made You Feel Second Best…


The news hasn't been good for Gary Johnson lately. First his PAC runs into some trouble in Utah, then Willie Nelson takes back his endorsement. From the official blog of Willie's Teapot Party:

This isn't the first time Willie's been caught two-timing someone.

Yesterday, both the Teapot Party and Gary Johnson 2012 sent out press releases announcing the endorsement. The media immediately jumped on it, with Politico, Fox and Raw Story leading the coverage. We were on a roll.

But not so fast. I sent the press release and coverage links to Nelson. His response took me by surprise: "My position is it too early for me to endorse anyone. And I think every one should vote their own conscience."

I wrote back reminding him that he had approved the endorsement.

"I know I said that," Nelson replied. "But I think I will wait and see where he stands on other things. My bad. Sorry. I still think he is a good guy but so Is Dennis [Kucinich] and if he decided to run I would personally vote for him. If it came down to either him or Gary I'm already committed to Dennis. They both have said they support legal pot."

[Via Amanda Carey.]

NEXT: Alan W. Bock, RIP

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  1. All that smoking has ruined Willie’s brain.

    1. Because old age has never affected a teetotaler’s mind…

    2. In spite of all that smoking, his sense of smell is still good enough to sniff out a kook.

      1. Yes Max, Kucinich is a kook.

        1. I meant right-wing kook.

          1. Yes, Willie has partisan olfactory receptors.

            1. smoking pot makes you vote twice? We want it legalized 😉

          2. Kucinch isn’t a right-wing kook.

  2. Johnson or Kucinich. Strange, but I don’t think you can rationally support both.

    1. “I don’t think you can rationally support both.”

      Well, the “you” in this case is WN, so rationality probably wasn’t an issue.

    2. what’s “rationality” got to do w politics?

    3. He’s a single issue voter. And more loyal than the politicians he supports, I’m sure.

    4. Go suck Ron pauls cock. And stop linking to you’re crapy website. urkbold sucks.

      1. Heeeeeee’s baaaaaack.

        1. How can we miss him if he won’t stay away?

      2. Save are teachers.

      3. Wow Max, you must really be a big fan of Ron Paul if you are trying to line up blowjobs for him! Even through the fractured grade two grammar, your love of freedom and liberty shines though. It is a pleasure to read your reasoned and thoughtful discourse on this subject.

      4. it’s spelled Pual, you morom.

        1. … mormon applied to Mitt Romney

    5. I suppose you can if your interest in politics extends to a single issue. On the other hand, since Nelson’s interest in politics is so incredibly shallow, an endorsement from him means nothing as it would only bring in people who vote based on their love of Willie Nelson, and how many people are in that phonebooth?

    6. I don’t know, I like Kucinich — I would vote for him over Romney’s RINO ass, especially if he was balanced out by a GOP Congress.

      He’s the closet thing Democrats have to a Ron Paul type. Sort of a shitty Chinese knockoff where they forgot to add the spine, but you can’t expect anything better from team blue right now — no fucking quality control there.

  3. IIRC, Willie Nelson has always been an advocate of handouts for farmers.

    I felt a little queazy at his endorsement of Johnson.

  4. OT – how about a nutpunch?

    1. Nuts thouroughly punched.

  5. why do you think they call it dope?

    1. Out of rehab so soon, juanita?

      1. WIN!

  6. This is an example of why being a single issue voter is dumb.

    1. Single issue candidates are even dumber.

      I’m not voting for them in the future no matter what.

      1. Nineleven.

      2. I would usually agree, however if I was a New Yorker [shudders], I would consider voting for that “Rent Is Too Damn High Party” guy. Just to see peoples’ heads asploding all over Manhattan.

        1. He’s running for president as a Republican.

          1. he’ll fit right into that gop clown parade

            1. Pretty sure most of the posters on here would agree with you on that one. Tell me, though, what that would have to do with a bunch of libertarians.

              1. you brought him up

      1. Wanna buy some snakes?

    2. This is a good example of why voting is dumb.

  7. Come on guys… I’m an old hippie and while marijuana legalization is my only real concern, I would prefer to smoke my refer in a Socialist country rather than a Capitalist one.

    Seriously, can’t we all just share the weed? I’m afraid Gary Johnson would actually be for a marijuana “market”, and that really makes me sad. Now excuse me, I have an appointment with my dealer and I have a hungry unicorn to feed.

  8. I for one support the piglet Johnson. He know that the best way to run the country is through mass legalization of brain power. If that doesn’t indeed happen soon, my friends and I will initiate a coup-day-tat on the men in trench-coats that are keeping my brain power locked up and under seal. Get ready for the rumble, Willie, get ready!

  9. WTF|5.19.11 @ 12:24PM|#
    “OT – how about a nutpunch –…..ling-911/?”

    Sweet mother of God. If only I could put that cop onto his knees and empty my fucking magazine into his worthless, despotic back.

    1. I think a tremendous beating would be more in order.

      1. I was engaged in hyperbole, but that’s something I’d honestly be willing to do. Get a few guys together, attack the guy at his house, and beat the fuck out of him.

        1. I think I’ll just put this here and see if your head explodes when you open it.

          1. O_____________O

          2. Jesus Christ – I am actually at a loss for words. I’m sure they found that when he beat down the old man ‘procedures were followed’.

          3. I’m sad, but unsurprised.


      1. I’m an atheist.

    3. who says the old fart wannabe didnt deserve that stomping? and the ol lady in her wheelchair shoulda been shoved-down the basement stairs for a ride. citizens arrest my ass

      1. What a fucking moron. Google is your friend.

      2. This clearly is a spoof. Even OO isn’t this stupid.

        1. “Even OO isn’t this stupid.”
          Cite missing.

          1. site

    4. For the record, it appears that the entire story comes from the civil complaint recently filed by the elderly man. While it certainly could have happened that way, I’d warn against taking the word of a plaintiff’s attorney as gospel truth.

      1. Hmmm…word of a cop v. word of an 84 year old man and his attorney…who to believe, who to believe? Your point is valid, CMS, but I know which way I lean on this one. Or maybe I’ve been overly jaded by the weekly Balko.

      2. The story says the supervisor called the ambulance back and the old man was taken to the hospital. If that’s the case, there’s a lot more than the (alleged) victim’s word to back up his injuries.

        1. If he wasn’t a cop, what would he probably get charged with for that in Alabama?

        2. if that ambulance arrived on scene and left, that could be abandonment. once i start my assessment it’s my patient, my responsibility, and my scene.

        3. The story linked to the complaint, and it looked to me like everything was taken directly from the complaint. Again, I’m not saying it didn’t happen (and I’m a regular Agitator reader so I’m as skeptical of cops as anybody). I’m just saying that, as a lawyer, relying on a plaintiff’s complaint as a factually accurate description of an event is kind of like relying on a campaign commercial as a factually accurate description of a candidate’s strengths and weaknesses.

          1. I’m sure there’s some reasonable explanation for how the 84 year old guy ended up with a broken nose and screwed up shoulder.

              1. [shrugs shoulders]

                Works for me.

    5. Okay, that incident occurred two years ago, and the couple filed suit against Trent:

      But since he got that award in 2010, I don’t think anything has come of it. This circling the wagons and willful ignorance of these incidents by PDs is obnoxious.

      1. The chief of police is Bill Press and he can be reached at (251) 990-0191.

        Please keep all comments courteous and polite.

  10. Hey, why not see if he will endorse Ron Paul? Maybe Willie doesn’t have any black or gay friends.

    1. Considering that nobody here gives a shit about Ron Paul personally and that the reason libertarians and constitutionalists and true republicans support/endorse his is that he’s the best of the viable candidates, I’m not sure you’re really going to accomplish what you’re going for here – nobody is going to be offended.

      Go away.

      1. The best of the viable cadidates??? Is English your native language, you deranged fuck?

        1. Yeah. He’s not likely to win it, but he’s viable. It may be monumentally difficult for you to accept that, but it’s your problem. Go fuck yourself.

        2. Max, what is your definition of viable?


  11. Kucinich is in the Dem party…

    Last I checked the dems already had a candidate.

    On a side note to defend Willie….Kucinich despite being severely flawed is better then Obama.

    1. He would also give us the first FLILF in the history of the White House (or, at the very least, the recent history).

      1. redhead.

      2. I wonder if he thought that day back in 1977 that he was elected mayor of Cleveland, that that very same year his future wife was being born.

        1. I’m sure she married him for his looks . . . and his contact with aliens.

          1. Yeah. He probably looks like her dad.

        2. speaking of Cleveland and creepy:


          Not bad looking. Well done, bachelor president, well done.

    2. My stupid, neutered male cat is better than Obama.

  12. When you’re scrambling for Willie Nelson’s endorsement, you are officially Not Relevant.

    Sad. I think there’s something to Gary Johnson. Not this time, though.

    1. I’m hoping Paul pulls a Michael-Bay-movie-sudden-reversal-of-fortunes-at-the-end-of-the-movie and wins the nomination.

      1. You’re a fucking idiot.

        1. Coming from you, that’s the grandest of compliments.

          1. That doesn’t make any sense. How can being called a fucking idiot by anybdoy be a compliment?

            1. Because you’re so full of shit – you’re a morally depraved cock-sucker, and when you call somebody an idiot, chances are that the guy you’re insulting is right

              1. amazing u had to ‘splain that

                1. Not that amazing. Anybody who can’t spell anybody is obviously too stupid to understand much of anything as all his other posts clearly illustrate.

    2. you are officially Not Relevant

      No one is relevant right now.

      Only 15% of the voting public is even paying attention to any of this election shit.

  13. As of May 16, 2011, Scott was still employed by the Fairhope Police Department.

    Just waiting for the promotion and raise.

    And- seriously, who gives a shit who Willie! plans to vote for? He’s in on the agrofuel boondoggle.

    1. It honestly wouldn’t surprise me if that’s what happened. It’s gut-wrenchingly disgusting.

  14. If pot smoking aliens invaded tomorrow, Willie would endorse them.

    1. And if intelligent , alien pot plants invaded tomorrow Willie would smoke them.

      1. My God, what a spectacle/press conference that would be, if only stoners could save the world from alien invasion.

        Actually, I think I read a short story along those lines, but I don’t remember who wrote it. It was set in Vietnam, IIRC.

        1. ‘Overdose’– I think it was by Spider Robinson, but it’s been a few decades since I read it, so I can’t be certain.

  15. I’m betting that Willie has been following Gingrich and said “I need to get me some of whatever he’s smoking!”

  16. Who knew Willie was a single-issue voter. Based on his history I would have guessed taxes would be right up there with pot!

    1. Here, have 2 internets.

    2. And with Kucinich, he’s supporting his nemesis.

  17. Maybe he was high when he made the endorsement.

    Kinda reminds me of an episode of The Honeymooners when Ralph was in trouble with the IRS.

    Norton: Just plead the 18th Amendment.

    Ralph: You mean the 5th Amendment. The 18th Amendment was Prohibition.

    Norton: Tell ’em you were drunk when you filled out the return.

  18. Willie then wrote back: “The Teapot Party is millions of people. It’s not me. I jokingly said after I got out of jail in Texas that there is a Tea Party and there should be a Teapot Party. The difference between us is we follow our own drummer. No one can tell us how to think.

    Who is the person that can tell the Tea Party how to think? On the other hand, the Teapot Party will or will not endorse Johnson based on what Willie says.

  19. Nelson isn’t a libertarian. Moving on…

    1. Soros isn’t either.

      But I sure like the money that he spends on campaigns to legalize pot.

  20. Now, if Johnson had endorsed legal pot and subsidized Doritos, then…

  21. We live in a country where life-dictating federal officials don’t know the difference between a bullet and a round, and where multi-trillion-dollar chasms are okay – what politician could possibly save us from the ignorance?

    1. Would you laugh if I said Mitt Romney?

      1. Yeah

  22. Gary Johnson, one more ringer to damage Dr Ron?
    thanks Willie and all of operation unmask

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