Nice Work If You Can Get It


Some ex-undercover British cops are alleging they were encouraged to have sex with the leftist activists they were investigating.

Undercover police officers routinely adopted a tactic of "promiscuity" with the blessing of senior commanders, according to a former agent who worked in a secretive unit of the Metropolitan police for four years.

The former undercover policeman claims that sexual relationships with activists were sanctioned for both men and women officers infiltrating anarchist, leftwing and environmental groups.

Sex was a tool to help officers blend in, the officer claimed, and was widely used as a technique to glean intelligence. His comments contradict claims last week from the Association of Chief Police Officers that operatives were absolutely forbidden to sleep with activists…

He said undercover officers, particularly those infiltrating environmental and leftwing groups, viewed having sex with a large number of partners "as part of the job"…

"Everybody knew it was a very promiscuous lifestyle," said the former officer, who first revealed his life as an undercover agent to theObserver last year. "You cannot not be promiscuous in those groups. Otherwise you'll stand out straightaway."

The claims follow the unmasking of undercover PC Mark Kennedy, who had sexual relationships with several women during the seven years he spent infiltrating a ring of environmental activists. Another two covert officers have been named in the past fortnight who also had sex with the protesters they were sent to spy on, fuelling allegations that senior officers had authorised sleeping around as a legitimate means of gathering intelligence.

The one no-no?

The one stipulation, according to the officer from the Special Demonstration Squad (SDS), a secret unit formed to prevent violent disorder on the streets of London, was that falling in love was considered highly unprofessional because it might compromise an investigation.

That sound you hear is the furious typing of a dozen Hollywood writers racing to churn out the next Hugh Grant rom-com. "He was a hardened, law-and-order undercover cop and lifelong Tory; she was an unshaven, free love animal rights crusader with a rap sheet and a heart of gold…."

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  1. I doubt she will be “unshaven” in the movie.

    1. Her legs will be

  2. The movie would work better as a sequel to Hot Fuzz, but we’ll see it on Law & Order: Subtitle first.

  3. How many of these groups really need to be spied upon? My guess is…none. How much taxpayer money is spent on undercover agents fucking people? I guarantee that if the public were able to audit all the operations in place by law enforcement agencies, a massive proportion would turn out to be utterly pointless shit like this.

    1. They “had” to sleep with those women like US cops “have” to shoot the family dogs. Officer safety first, law and regulations second.

    2. It’s telling that they justify their behavior with the excuse that these groups have promiscuous women in them, and not that this undercover work saves lives by thwarting nefarious eco-terrorist plots.

    3. You laugh, but just wait till they get those buttons that explode climate deniers.

    4. I’m sorry, but I’m reminded of Richard Burton’s role in “The Spy Who Came in From the Cold”

      Obviously there is a play on that title somewhere.

      FWIW, since hollywood does nothing but remakes and sequels anymore, that would be a darn good movie to redo. But I think maybe its dated because its so necessarily “cold war” …

      …actually, now that I think about it, Don Cheadle’s ‘Traitor’ (2008) was kind of exactly that; something like the TSWCIFTC, but in the context of islamic jihadists…

      But back to the Undercover Cop Banging Hippy Extremists:m Do they have some sort of carnival-style finger-Love-Meter to ensure their agents are purely carnal in their relationships? “You’re in Love McClaine! Your badge and your gun, now!”

  4. “He was a hardened, law-and-order undercover cop and lifelong Tory; she was an unshaven, free love animal rights crusader with a rap sheet and a heart of gold….”

    He was as hard as his life had become; fucking women for a living was demanding,those bitches demanded satisfaction.

    He thought of her shaved pussy as he stood in front of the mirror, his wife wanted to be fucked too.

    He turned off the water, and wiped his clean-shaven face; he returned to bed and would do his duty for God, Queen, and country

    He would be knighted when this undercover life was over. “I dub thee knight Sir, you have given all for your country

    1. The Queen’s top swordmans

      How many double or triple entendres can you find?

      1. 1.The Queen stops sword(sordid) man

        2.The Queens tops (fucks)sword (erect) man

        3.The Queen’s top sword (penis) man

        4.T he Queens top swor dmans (swore demands)

        5. The Queen’s tops or (whore?) dmands (demands)

  5. Rioting in Egypt. Egypt blocks Twitter.

    1. Shocker that Mubarak and his admin. would clamp down on the social networks. One would think that this is only a temporary condition, as the Iranians were able to keep the flow of information going amid clampdowns.

  6. Ewwwwwww. Sex with hippies. Only if they shower first and I use two condoms.

    1. Sex with British hippies – you left that very important tidbit out!


    2. Sheepskin?

    3. two condoms? I don’t have a dick but what would be the point in having sex, and not feeling anything?
      Oh, I see you’re British

  7. “Everybody knew it was a very promiscuous lifestyle,” said the former officer, who first revealed his life as an undercover agent to the Observer last year. “You cannot not be promiscuous in those groups. Otherwise you’ll stand out straightaway.”

    Which tells me that at least half of the people in those groups probably did not join out of ideological purity but as a way to get laid.

    Maybe the Weather Underground was founded pretty much for the same reason… I wonder what happened in those “reunions” at Bill Ayers’ home… Hmmm!

    1. “Eyes Wide Shut” redux?

      *Quotations denote Intellectual Property

    2. Every body got naked. Once the tarp like bloomers were removed, and Michelle Obama’s huge cellulite, stretch mark and pimple ridden ass was exposed to the light of day, not much but a lot of puking happened after that.

  8. British environmental activists. Somehow I feel like I’m not missing anything.

    1. Ahh, we don’t get to have sex with libertarians who think natural girls are dirty? Our loss 😉

      1. If by “natural” you mean “dirty”

        1. no by natural, I mean a man should smell like a man

          1. Do you also think a woman should smell like a man?

  9. You cannot not be promiscuous in those groups. Otherwise It’s the only way you’ll stand out straightaway.


  10. What movie titles?

    Warrantless Entry
    Undercover under covers
    On Her Majesty’s Secret Escort Service

    1. Blue/Green
      For Queen and (Global) Community
      ELF vs Predator

      1. ELF vs. Predator FTW

    2. From England Without Love

    3. A shame that The Spy Who Shagged Me is already taken…

  11. I’m having deja vu…..

  12. Is this latest abuse another example of the slippery slope?

    1. It wasn’t slippery. At first.

      1. MANDY: Well, Brian, your father isn’t Mr. Cohen.

        BRIAN: I never thought he was.

        MANDY: Now, none of your cheek! He was a Roman, Brian. He was a centurion in the Roman army.

        BRIAN: You mean. . .you were raped?

        MANDY: Well, at first, yes.

        BRIAN: Who was it?

        MANDY: Heh. Nortius Maximus his name was. Hmm. Promised me the known world he did. I was to be taken to Rome, House by the Forum. Slaves. Asses’ milk. As much gold as I could eat. Then, he, having his way with me had. . . voom! Like a rat out of an aqueduct.

        1. sloopyinca|1.25.11 @ 11:50AM|#
          Individual liberty except in instances of intellectual property, is the common denominator.

          This could be the start of a Monty Python scene from Life of Brian. “All right… all right… but apart from better sanitation and medicine and education and irrigation and public health and roads and a freshwater system and baths and public order… what have the Romans done for us?”

          Two from that masterpiece within an hour. Guess I need to fire up the DVD this afternoon.

          1. It’s all things to all people.

  13. The first rule of the Jersey Shore infiltrating anarchists groups is, “Never fall in love on the Jersey Shore when infiltrating anarchists groups.”

  14. Why do regular cop dickheads need to be “gathering intelligence”? England sure is fucked up.

  15. It is indeed a very powerful recruiting inducement.

  16. I think this work should qualify as combat pay.

  17. This reminds me of the numerous stories I have read about cops getting head or getting laid before they arrest chicks during prostitution stings here in the good ol’ USA. I don’t think this is just an English thing.

    1. This is, of course, the New Professionalism to which Scalia referred. After all, police work is not the oldest profession.

  18. eeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwww!!!!

    SEX WITH A COP!!!????

    That is really sick.

    1. You gotta see the jezabel take on this. From the comments, about half consider it rape.


  19. The Guardian article doesn’t make mention of officers investigating libertarian groups who were encouraged to masturbate furiously.

    Sorry, somebody had to say it.

    1. Speaking of swollen members, if a couple of cops ever infiltrated a libertarian group, we’d know something was up because we’d go from four members to six overnight.

  20. Our meetings are such sausage fests. I wish the government would send some babes to investigate us.

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