Reason Morning Links: CIA Hires Xe, BP Based Plan on Bad Federal Data, Lion Burgers

• BP based oil spill contingency plan on flawed federal government projections it was required to use.
• CIA hires Xe, formerly known as Blackwater, to guard facilities in Afghanistan.
• Arizona restaurant under fire for serving World Cup-themed lion burgers.
• Turnstyle-hoppers in Paris's subway form insurance fund against getting caught.
• L.A. boycotts Arizona over immigration bill—but exempts company that makes revenue-generating traffic cameras.

Comments

[Ragin Cajun]

Arizona restaurant under fire for serving World Cup-themed lion burgers.

Top of the food chain, baby!

[Greasy Spoon]

Lion, the Other White Meat.

[Johnny Longtorso]

Tow The Lion Burger

[Suki]

Quote from article: "I'm thoroughly disgusted to say the least. What's next? Dogs? Cats?"

Me: Hey lady, lions are cats! And dogs are for beating, not eating.

[Asshole Cop]

I thought dogs were for shooting.

[Suki]

How can they fight if you shoot them? Bad cop, no kimchi.

[Graham Wellington]

I agree with her; it's ridiculous. We have beef, and we have chicken. What more do you people want?! You can't pet a cow. You can't pet a chicken. Their slaughter is so far removed from society it *might as well not have happened.*

Lions, on the other hand, are at the zoo. Ever see a cow at a zoo? Lions are like big house cats, and I have a couple house cats, and they are soft and furry and fun to pet. I think it's pretty logical to connect the dots here. If lions weren't wont to rip people's faces off, we would pet them too. And thus we have completely irrefutable proof that eating lions is immoral. It makes AZCentral lady (oh, how I abhor thee) uncomfortable.

[Pro Libertate]

I propose a new holiday: Dominance Day. On that day we will celebrate our dominance over all other species by eating a member of each of the other species. Each human would bid on the species he wants to consume, with the proceeds from the auction going to the Preserve Human Dominance Fund.

[Almanian]

I'm in - I'll bid on perch, cause I really like perch.

[Ragin Cajun]

I really like Gulf oysters, so I'm looking forward to...uh, oh right.

[The Gobbler]

I'm partial to flame-roasted Kemps Ridley sea turtles:

http://www.foxnews.com/scitech.....f-captain/

[Ragin Cajun]

Maybe they can swing by Florida and roast us some manatees, too. If someone brings beer, we've got a party.

[Suki]

If someone from Texas brings the mesquite I will be glad to bring the dessert.

[Brett L]

Mmm, sea cow burgers.

[I'm in too]

- I'll bid on Reason posters, cause I really like bitches.

[Pro Libertate]

Dominance Day is about human domination of other species.

[I'm in too]

My point-dessert

[The Ghost of Jeffrey Dahmer]

I wish they had that idea while I was around. I was an environmentalist and practiced recycling in its truest form by reducing human carbon footprints. Though even *I* wouldn't eat yucky girl parts like placenta. Some people are such sickos!

[Nick]

I don't care which animal I eat as long as I can do it in front of PETA. Preferably it's a really cute baby animal.

[Pro Libertate]

I did some checking, and it turns out that we've only identified 1.7 million species to date. Which is good news, as that means that, with approximately 6.9 billion people on Earth, we need roughly 4,000 of each species to ensure each human's participation. That should give us wealthier folks a chance at something edible and filling (most of those species are insects).

[Suki]

My bis is always for whale. If I have to buy the whole thing in the auction then I will be sharing and selling too.

[Pro Libertate]

Yes, that raises an important point: On Dominance Day, all legal prohibitions on killing and eating other animals are null and void. But only for Dominance Day consumption!

[Suki]

Those laws are unconstitutional anyway. If you want cooked whale, bring your own copy of the federal registry.

[Pro Libertate]

Let's not clutter the Dominance Day celebrations with politics. Human dominance of other species transcends politics, religion, culture, and pretty much everything else.

[Rich]

Councilman Paul Koretz also pointed to a report from the city's top budget advisor that says Los Angeles' revenue from tickets falls about $300,000 short of covering payments to ATS and the LAPD's costs to run the program. "Is there any way for us not to lose money?" Koretz asked

No. There is absolutely no way.

[Tony Hayward]

BP based oil spill contingency plan on flawed federal government projections it was required to use

BP inherited those projections!

[AlmightyJB]

Walter E. Williams on the cleanup

http://econfaculty.gmu.edu/wew.....ragedy.htm

BTW...if you don't have his book More Liberty Means Less Government on your coffee table, you should.

[Johnny Longtorso]

On tonight's menu: Placenta
Most women's afterbirth winds up in the trash. I fried mine with a little soy, garlic and ginger

Gore implicated in sex assault on Portland masseuse

[Ragin Cajun]

I can't figure out which is more disgusting.

[John]

Gore was just trying to get her to warm his globe.

[Rich]

"Would you eat another woman's mother cake?" I asked my husband.

Now, *there* is an entrepreneurial opportunity!

[SugarFree]

"I was shocked and I did not massage beyond what is considered a safe, nonsexual area of the abdomen," she said. "He further insisted and acted angry, becoming verbally sharp and loud."

"I went into much deeper shock as I realized it appeared he was demanding sexual favors or sexual behaviors." The woman said Gore grabbed her hand and shoved it toward his pubic area.

She alleged he later tried to have sex with her and began caressing her before she squirmed out of his grasp.

Apparently, Tipper hasn't been south of the equator in years.

[John]

This is bad. This is just as bad as what the pervert Senator from Idaho got caught doing in the airport bathroom.

Maybe it is not true but who has a reason to lie here? Why would a masseuse make up a story like this? It is not like she could sue Gore and make money.

My question is why is Al going to hookers? Can't he just go down to a local Sierra Club meeting and get cute, dumb hippie chicks to bang him to save the earth.

[Nick]

It's worse. Gore was being somewhat forceful in his attempt according to the girl's statement. I can't wait to hear Femenisting and Jezebel not call him a rapist because he's saving the planet by recycling garbage with his mouth.

[Ska]

Is it really that hard for a politically connected assbag to find out where the rub and tugs are? Shit, I'm not in politics, but I know who to call.

[John]

Al Gore, Duke Lacrosse players and how they are treated on Feministing and Jezebel. Compare and contrast.

[Suki]

Sounds like the massage person was not unresponsive.

[Cabeza de Vaca]

The National Enquirer is making this claim. Sometimes they print real stories, but most of the time they just make stuff up. I kind of doubt that this is a real story.

[SugarFree]

Almost verbatim what joe wrote when the Edwards baby thing was broke by the Enquirer. Once it was proven true, then joe said that if it was true, it didn't matter anyway.

[Ted S.]

Hasn't the National Enquirer been much more circumspect about fact-checking since the Carol Burnett lawsuit some 30 years ago?

[John Edwards]

I agree Cabeza.

[World War II Japan]

http://images.bimedia.net/documents/gore-PPB.pdf

Here is the victim's statement. Maybe she is lying. But the National Inquirer is not making this up. The only reason it is not front page on a reputable newspaper is because Al Gore is a liberal saint. If this were Dick Cheney or Dan Quayle it would be the biggest story going on right now. And would be a perfect excuse to distract the public from the BP spill.

[John]

That is not the statement. I can't find it. But people keep referring to it and say it is 70 pages long. He was clearly accused of this in 2007. But nothing came of it.

[John]

http://www.flashalertnewswire......eports.pdf

There it is.

[SugarFree]

I wonder if The Washington Post has known about this for months, like the Edwards baby.

[Mike M.]

My question is why is Al going to hookers?

Have you seen what the guy looks like these days?

[John]

Dude, the guy from Death Cab For Cutie married Zoe Freakin Deschanel. Being a fugley dork in no way prevents you from getting laid if you are famous and have some cash.

[Slut Bunwalla]

That still pisses me off, and I'm going to be angry about it until they divorce.

Not that I think I have a shot with Zooey or anything, it's just...I mean, goddamn. She deserves better than that hipster doofus, you know?

[Broken Windows Fallacy]

Me to. Either that marriage dies or justice must.

[Butts Wagner]

Unfortunately, I'm fairly certain that Zooey is a a hipster doofus herself.

[The Lone Stoner]

Even dirty hippies have standards.

[The Ghost of David Koresh]

My question is why is Al going to hookers?

I wondered the same thing; Al needs pointers on the finer aspects of being the object of cult worship!

[PapayaSF]

I don't think any massage I've ever had included my abdomen. In fact it's the one area I'd prefer they don't massage.

[The Angry Optimist]

Hey! I scooped that placenta first.

[The Doula]

No, I scooped it.

[Suki]

And I scooped the Gore massage first.

[Jesse Walker]

Placenta helper.

[Suki]

LULZ

[Atanarjuat]

What everyone will look like in Libertopia. Meet Billy the Human Billboard.

[Ving LouMino]

Oh wow, no way dude that is just totally insane.

Lou
http://www.anon-vpn.at.tc

[The Offspring]

Listen to the voice of reason
Unify with that single line
Stop the man with the power
Of the government
A leader's not the center
Of democracy

America
All of your enemies
Come from within
But you lash out so
It is seen
Like some frightened child
In an angry world
Or the fall of Rome
Your demise comes
From your own hands

In a world without leaders
Who'd start all the wars?
The world that you're saving
Will always be yours

In a world without leaders
We might have a chance
But we'll never see it
As long as there's

[-]

How profound. Not.

[Rich]

Some profundity may result from the lack of an ending -- "As long as there's" ... what?

[?]

Has to rhyme with "chance."

Vance?
Nance?

[J sub D]

France.

[?]

Win!

[F S Theater]

Ze Dance.

[John]

http://www.grist.org/article/2.....ankruptcy/

BP considering bankruptcy. Could there be better evidence of how in over his head Obama is? Obama is a lawyer. His supporters never tire of telling us how he was editor of Harvard Law Review. Any lawyer knows that Chapter 11/13 is always an option if a debter is pushed too hard. Hell there is a whole fucking industry based on that principle. That is all these credit counseling places do. They call your creditors and tell them to drop their interest rates or take their chances in bankruptcy.

A actual leader who had some wisdom and leadership ability would have been more circumspect about how BP was treated rather than just running around like a jackass scoring political points. Since Obama has neither wisdom nor leadership ability, it was obvious which choice he was going to take.

[Rich]

BP considering bankruptcy.

And seabed considering collapse (props to Coeus).

This could get, um, *interesting*.

[John]

I read that. It is really depressing. I did legal work for the oil industry in Oklahoma when I got out of law school. It is seriously dangerous work. The forces underneath the earth are not to be screwed with.

[Suki]

Luddite!

[Nick]

So, were the Mayans right after all? Sea floor collapsing sounds an awful lot like, "Earth's crust falls into Earth's core displacing liquid hot magma."

[Astrid]

I'm not surprised. It's was quite suspect that they were so willing to part with the 20 billion. You don't give up over a third of your projected profits for several years without knowing something big is up.

[Resident Smartass]

They just want their lives back.

[Astrid]

But they still care about the small people.

[J sub D]

BP based oil spill contingency plan on flawed federal government projections it was required to use.

The government models, which oil companies are required to use but have not been updated since 2004, assumed that most of the oil would rapidly evaporate or get broken up by waves or weather. In the weeks since the Deepwater Horizon caught fire and sank, real life has proven these models, prepared by the Interior Department's Mineral Management Service, wrong.

A clusterfuck all around. BP, Transocean, the MMS have all displayed various levels of incompetence compounded by hubris.

I know I'm preaching to the choir, but the liability hit that BP is taking (some of which should be borne by Transocean and the Department of the Interior) will do far more to promote safe drilling practices than all the coke snorting, porn surfing regulators ever have or will.

[John]

Exactly. You don't think the guys at Exxon are not watching this in horror? The account of the accident in the WSJ a few weeks ago was fascinating. It was right out of a Hollywood movie. BP sent some suit brown noser down to make sure that transocean did its job. Well the suit it turned out was a menace and overruled the transocean people on several key decisions that lead to the accident. The night before the accident there was nearly a fist fight between the BP and the transocean people with the transocean people telling the BP people they were going to blow up the rig if they were not careful. And the BP people saying "we are in charge here".

[JW]

How it should have gone down:

Ripley: I say we take off, and nuke the site from orbit. It's the onyl way to be sure.
Hudson: Fuckin' a.
Burke: Whoa, whoa wait a a minute. This place has a substantial dollar value attached to it.
Ripley: They can "bill" me.
Burke: Look. I know this is an emotional moment for all of us, okay I know that. But let's not make snap judgments, this is an important species we're dealing with, and I don't think that you or I has the right to arbitrarily exterminate them.
Ripley: Wrong.

[Edmund Burke]

I side with the unfortunate possessor of my surname; he makes a classically liberal argument.

[Lost_In_Translation]

Wait, what? Nearly a fistfight? BP declaring "it was in charge"? Beyond the mechanic's statement that Harrell and Vidrine may or may not have disagreed the morning of the accident, what article suggests that BP came in guns blazing to show those "TransOcean" guys?

[John]

I can't find the original WSJ story. But here is a good summary from another source. Both TransOcean and Haliburton say the BP people were in charge and made the fatal decision against the advice of both TransOcean and Haliburton.

http://www.newsinferno.com/archives/20691

[John]

I still can't find the article in the WSJ. IT was great. But here is another article referencing it. Here is the "suit" I was talking about.

http://www.rigzone.com/news/article.asp?a_id=93841

Finally, a BP manager overseeing final well tests apparently had scant experience in deep-water drilling. He told investigators he was on the rig to "learn about deep water," according to notes of an interview with him seen by the Journal.

[Ragin Cajun]

Is this the article you seek?

[Ragin Cajun]

Actually, maybe this one is the one.

[John]

You the man.

A disagreement broke out on the rig on April 20 over the procedures to be followed. At 11 a.m., workers for the half-dozen contractors working on the rig gathered for a meeting. Douglas Brown, Transocean's chief mechanic on the rig, testified Wednesday at a hearing in Louisiana that a top BP official had a "skirmish" with top Transocean officials.

The Transocean workers, including offshore installation manager Jimmy Wayne Harrell, disagreed with a decision by BP's top manager about how to remove drilling mud and replace it with lighter seawater. Mr. Brown said he heard Mr. Harrell say, "I guess that is what we have those pinchers for," referring to a part of the blowout preventer that would shut off the well in case of an emergency.

BP won the argument, said Mr. Brown, who is a plaintiff in a suit against BP and Transocean. Mr. Harrell declined Journal requests for comment.

A little after 5 p.m., to check the well's integrity and whether gas was seeping in, rig workers did what is called a "negative pressure test." It was supervised by a BP well-site leader, Robert Kaluza. His experience was largely in land drilling, and he told investigators he was on the rig to "learn about deep water," according to Coast Guard notes of an interview with him. BP declined to comment on his experience.

A lawyer for Mr. Kaluza said he "did no wrong on the Deepwater Horizon."

The test initially strayed from the procedure spelled out in BP's permit, approved by the MMS, according to the Coast Guard interview with Mr. Kaluza. When the first test results indicated something might be leaking, workers repeated the test, this time following the permitted procedure. The second time, pressure rose sharply, with witnesses saying that the well "continued to flow and spurted," according to notes gathered by BP's investigators that were reviewed by the Journal. BP denies violating its MMS permit.

[The Choir]

LAAAA LAAAA LAAAAAAAAAA!!

[J sub D]

Arizona restaurant under fire for serving World Cup-themed lion burgers.

Why is this news? Living in Detroit, I can testify that the Lions have been ground meat for their opponents to feast on for all of this century.

[Suki]

+1

[Almanian]

As a Michiganderanianist as well, I feel your pain. +1 to go w/Suki's.

[John]

http://hotair.com/archives/201.....-festival/

I wish this were just a case of cops being PC. But from reading Reason I know that is not the case. It is not that the cops respected the Muslims. It is that like all cops, they hate the First Amendment.

[Nick]

Muise faxed a letter Monday to Dearborn Police Chief Ronald Haddad requesting the return of his clients' cameras and tapes.

Anyone want to guess the derivation of the surname Haddad?

[Suki]

Zionist?

And where would you rather live, Dearborn or Gaza?

[The Angry Optimist]

Wow, Suki, talk about your existential dilemmas.

[John]

I have a friend who lives in Gaza as a reporter. She loves it. It is beautiful. If you can give Hamas a reason not to kill you and live in a building with a generator, it is quite nice I am told.

[R C Dean]

If you can give Hamas a reason not to kill you

That's a pretty fucking big "if".

[Suki]

I'll start a generator fund for MNG.

[Kolohe]

Chief Haddad is indeed Arab, but there's a good chance that he's part of the Lebanese (and other Arab states) Christian dispora that settled in Michigan over the last 40+ years, and makes up the majority of the Arab-American population in the region. (he's been working as a cop in Michigan since the early 70's)

[Tin Foil Hatter]

The perfect cover for instituting Sharia Law! Sleeper cell!

[John]

I didn't think this had anything to do with protecting Muslims. It has everything to do with cops being assholes.

[Kolohe]

yes, I was responding to Nick

[dbcooper]

Looks like Australia is going to return to sanity vis-?-vis internet censorship, with Rudd's ouster. The dickhead Comms Minister is rumoured to be getting the chop.

[Isaac Bartram]

I can't see that. From what I can see Gillard represents a leftward swing. Unless I misread him Rudd is a third-way type while she is appears to be a doctrinaire socialist.

I'm pretty sure the socialists want to censor and control the internet as much as anyone anyway.

Word is she's going to call an election soon to establish her own mandate. I won't make any predictions but I don't think a climate change bill and a mining surtax are going to be anymore popular under her than they were under Rudd.

And what the hell is this anyway? Isn't a government change in 'strylya worth a morning link? Especially when you consider the kind of coup that brought it about, pretty dramatic, if you ask me.

[Cows]

What makes lions so special that people shouldn't eat them? Scarcity? Dogs and cats can kiss my ass. Eat Mor Chikin!

[Suki]

+2

[Brett L]

Baby lions are cute and baby cows are veal.

[ChicagoTom]

What makes lions so special that people shouldn't eat them? Scarcity? Dogs and cats can kiss my ass. Eat Mor Chikin!

They're the kings of the Jungle. You can't eat the kings, that would result in anarchy!

[P Brooks]

Councilman Tom LaBonge strongly backed the LAPD, citing a report that there have been no deaths from red-light-running accidents at affected intersections since cameras were installed. Councilman Richard Alarcon warned that if the cameras were shutdown and someone was killed at one of those intersections, "the media would have a field day."

Magic cameras.

[CaptainSmartass]

If the safety from the cameras does exist, it's because people see the cameras and don't risk a ticket by running a red light. In which case, they don't even need to be operative to have the same effect.

[Kolohe]

L.A. boycotts Arizona over immigration bill?but exempts company that makes revenue-generating traffic cameras

Reminds me of how the latest House version of the bill that limits interchange fees intend to exempt state and local govt's (that issue debit cards for unemployement ben's & the like) - due to lobbying from the govt's that predicts the banks will wind up charging the gov more for issuing the cards.

http://money.usnews.com/money/.....ee-changes

[J sub D]

To be fair, it is only governments that would be charged more for cards. For everbody else it will be free.

[SIV]

"In Africa they do eat lions, so I assume if it's OK for Africans to eat lions then it should be OK for us."

It should be but...

Norwegians, Icelanders, and Japanese eat whales.

Chinese,Vietnamese, Koreans eat dogs

Belgians,French and Japanese eat horses.

Try serving any of those and watch how fast the government would shut down the restaurant.

[J sub D]

Meh. I've had dog. Horse meat was for sale at the local A&P when I was a child. If somebody sets up a successful panda breeding farm, they should be able to butcher and sell them as well.

If it's not an endangered species being taken from the wild, bon appetit.

[Suki]

They are endangered because they suck as a species. They need to get out of the way for we, the successful species.

[Astrid]

Had horse in Japan and dog in Korean. While neither was bad, it's not something I'd go out of my way to eat again. But I see no reason why the should be banned.

[World War II Japan]

Horses are noble beasts. I can't fathom wanting to eat one. And dogs, and lions for that matter, are protein eaters. There is just something about eating a predator that turns my stomach.

[J sub D]

Like rainbow trout?

[Astrid]

Or snake?

[John]

No reptiles thank you.

[Suki]

Not even alligator?

[John]

It is okay. I am not claiming my food rules are rational or even sane. But rules are rules. No snakes, generally no land dwelling protein eaters, and no noble beasts like horses.

[Astrid]

Well, to each his own. Though I question your rational as to horses being noble animals, most of the ones I've met are dicks.

[Suki]

I had no idea the breadth of your erotica taste.

[Astrid]

+1, Suki I walked right into that one.

[Mr. Ed]

Much to my delight, Assssstrid!

[John]

They can always sense when someone is not one of their people.

[Suki]

John, come on! Someone needs to eat the 'gaitor so I can have a new purse without guilt.

[Nick]

No land dwelling protein eaters? So, you don't eat chicken?

[John]

Bugs don't count.

[Suki]

See John? And 'gaitor tastes like chicken! Come on, Suki needs a new purse 🙂

[John]

True. But fish are different. We eat bottom feeders like crab and shrimp. Make that land predator.

[dave b.]

I have something I think you should read.

[John]

The person who wrote that is a savage.

[PapayaSF]

The Oatmeal is great. He wrote an amusing guide to what happens when web design projects go bad.

[Ragin Cajun]

Apparently the same person things we should respect the pigs.

[Ragin Cajun]

"thinks"...damn preview.

[John]

Pigs are evil. They are highly intelligent and have a taste for blood. Never feel guilty about whacking and eating a pig.

[?]

There are no evil animals, save humans, as we are the only animals with volition. All other animals are merely acting according to their nature. They have no choice. They were not created by Walt Disney.

[John]

I know. And generally I agree, except for when it concerns pigs. Pigs are evil.

[?]

Sometimes they're funny. But always they're tasty.

[Rabbi Mermelstein]

Ah ah ah! They're not Kosher!

[Suki]

If we gen-mod pigs with the right kind of feet can you bless them, or whatever that kosherization thing you do is?

[Rabbi Mermelstein]

Oy! You get them to chew a cud too, Shiksa-San, and I'll invest in this scheme personally!

[The Gobbler]

Steve Smith's not evil???

[R C Dean]

I wouldn't say a horse is any more noble than a deer or an elk. And I go out of my way to eat those.

[Bison]

What about us?

[?]

You make a great burger, that's what.

[R C Dean]

Oh, I've got plans for you. I'm off to Vermejo for fly fishing next week, and Ted always makes sure you're on the menu.

[T]

Bison tenderloin is the best piece of meat on the planet. Ted Turner may be a jackass, but he's right about that. I wish he'd open one of his restaurants here.

[Texans love horses]

RC, we are revoking your citizenship. Get the fuck out

[P Brooks]

"Blackwater has undergone some serious changes," said a U.S. official who is familiar with the deal and spoke on the condition of anonymity to discuss it freely.

"They've had to prove to the government that they're a responsible outfit. Having satisfied every legal requirement, they have the right to compete for contracts. They have people who do good work, at times in some very dangerous places. Nobody should forget that, either."

Does anybody speak on the record anymore? That is a pretty uncontroversial statement.

[PapayaSF]

An Obama administration official saying nice things about Blackwater is like a Hollywood actor saying something nice about Glenn Beck or Prop 8: you do it anonymously or you prepare to change careers.

[Almanian]

Now that I think of it, rather than Lion, what I'd actually like is some Pelican in oil, gently fried. And I know just the place I can get some...

[Warty]

Lions suck.

[Big Gay Lion]

Yeah we do. Roar.

[Suki]

That was pretty butch for a gay lion. I was expecting a meow until I saw the assless chaps.

[Big Gay Lion]

South Park. Season 1. Big Gay Al's Big Gay Boat Ride.

[John]

Ligers man. They are like my favorite animal.

[Astrid]

They taste almost as good as unicorns.

[John]

Ligers are real you know?

[Astrid]

Yes, and I stand by my previous statement.

[John]

In other news, it is good to be king. I wonder if that women can actually claim with a straight face she is marrying Prince Albert of Monaco for his good looks and personality instead of just for the opportunity to be a literal princess.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new.....stock.html

[Astrid]

If she puts enough Botox into her face, she could even say she loves him as a person and not for his money with a straight face.

[John]

she ought to ask around about the Grace Kelly. She lived a pretty miserable life. It sounds great to princess and all. But ultimately you are baby making machine and after that a piece of furniture. You are also the titular head of the church in Monaco and can't really have any life of your own beyond your ceremonial duties. And yes, your playboy husband will start cheating on you the day after you give him a male heir.

[The Ghost of Princess Diana]

Charles wasn't quite that way, but the narrative and the ending is essentially the same.

[Astrid]

Yeah, being royalty sucks, especially if you marry into it. But to some people I'm sure that the title and fame mean more to them than happiness. And I think you're being a bit generous with the time line for him cheating, it'll start as soon as she's preggers.

[CaptainSmartass]

I think to the right kind of narcissistic sociopath, title and fame brings more happiness than anything short of kicking puppies.

[Astrid]

There is that.

[John]

The only one who ever pulled it off with any style was the Queen Mum. She was a hoot and radiated class and dignity. The ones now, Grace Kelly, this woman, Latizia of Spain, just come across as gold diggers happy to be arm candy in return for a crown.

[The Gobbler]

Queen Noor (sp?) of Jordan seems mighty happy.

[John]

And of course the awful Dianna.

[Sarah Ferguson]

I'm still alive! Technically a former Dutchess, but still alive! (hic) Say, would you like to meet Prince Andrew? (hic)

[ev]

Yep. She's fucking sexy. Although it comes with somewhat of a price. Probably will get fucked harder than a sandblaster every night until she gets preggers.

Hey. Maybe he's good in bed. But. The baldness. There's always the baldness.

[John]

Maybe he is know as "tripod". But, as I said above, the job of being Princess of Monaco is not what it is cracked up to be. And she has to put out to produce a male heir or the whole place goes back to France.

[George Constanza]

"Correction...I was bald!"

[ev]

"He's not baaaaald...he's---balding."

"So eventually he will be bald?"

"Yeah."

[x,y]

The government models, which oil companies are required to use but have not been updated since 2004...

So they can blame Bush.

[CaptainSmartass]

To be fair, if you have a choice between blaming a white guy who didn't do his job and a black one who tried really hard, which one would you choose?

As long as Obama doesn't get caught on camera drinking from a 40 oz out of a paper bag, he's a success, as far as I'm concerned.

[John]

So you are okay with counting playing golf and having date nights with Michelle as "trying really hard"

[Barack Obama]

? "Hey, we're movin' on up..."?

[PapayaSF]

In what sense is Obama trying really hard? He spoke against the MMS while campaigning, but didn't do anything to change it once he got elected.

[R C Dean]

I can hardly wait for Obama to be out of the White House, so I can spend the next X years blaming every single fucking thing that goes wrong on him.

[tu quoque]

Are you sure you want to tread down that road?

[R C Dean]

Are you sure you want to tread down that road?

Why not? Its Dean's Golden Rule: You treat other people the way they treat other people. Or something like that.

[Slippery Slope]

Oh, OK. Nothing could go wrong there. Nothing at all. Are you sure you aren't a modern liberal?

[Mike Laursen]

CIA hires Xe, formerly known as Blackwater, to guard facilities in Afghanistan.

Wonder if they chose a name that people are going to have trouble pronouncing to confuse discussion of what they are up to?

[PapayaSF]

I believe it's pronounced "zee." The whole rebranding was a way to escape bad publicity, but the name itself was probably picked to be short, distinct, and not already taken.

[ray]

I pooped myself today. Yep, filled up my undies.