Public Health

We Will Not Tolerate Tolerance!


New York City is cracking down on "smoke-easies," bars and clubs that let their customers light up despite a municipal edict that forbids such accommodation. The latest target, according to The New York Times, is "one of the largest and busiest nightclubs in the city": the M2 Ultralounge on West 28th Street in Manhattan. "If the case against the club succeeds," the Times reports, "it would be the first time the city had closed a business solely for flouting a ban on smoking." Because many of the targeted night spots are defended by nearly impregnable barriers of coolness, the health department "has deputized a team of inspectors—many of them younger and hipper-looking than the stereotypical bureaucrat—to work into the wee hours, posing as patrons and hunting for tolerance of smoking by clubs' employees."

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  1. Johnny Cash to New York Nannies:


    1. Science fiction’s way ahead of this one. Daniel F. Galouye’s Simulacron-3, on which the movie Floor 13 was loosely based, featured smoke-easies flouting the city’s smoking prohibition in the simulated world.

      It also featured a government program that had all the excess labor force employed as poll-takers, with laws forcing you to take their surveys whenever they managed to catch you or else pay a refusal fee.

    2. Excellent. I may turn that into an avatar.

  2. I am a non-smoker and I don’t like choking on cigarette smoke.

    But I don’t need someone to save me from smokers. If I see a sign telling me that smoking is permitted, I can make up my own mind whether it’s worth going inside.

    Memo to smoking nannies: YOU ARE NOT MY PARENTS! (And even if you were, I’m old enough to make my own decisions.)

    1. You say that now, but little do you know that the tobacco companies are lobbying to have smoke blown into your home through a network of smoke-blowing tubes.

      1. That smoke is figurative, and it’s not being blown into our homes… it’s being blown up our asses, and the tubes are either cable or satellite TV.

        1. No, I was correct the first time. Pipes of smoke-filled air are being laid as we speak.

          1. Is that the Intertubes I keep hearing about? Between that and the pron, no wonder we have to stop it for the children.

            1. Yep, smoked porn.

              1. What, is that like lighting your cigar with an old copy of “Hustler” or something?

                1. So, who do we have to thank for “” ads? I do think a round of applause is in order.

                  1. I was wondering what sparked those. ‘Hipster’ and ‘New York’ maybe.

      2. If your being sarcastic then I apologize but if your not then your a moron.

        1. What, you doubt Big Tobacco’s insidious plans to construct a National Inhalation Infrastructure? You poor, n?ive fool!

    2. Yes we are, and you will do as your told young man.

  3. Bloomberg is always looking out for small business.

    1. He has no problem expanding the government’s role in businesses other than his own.

  4. This was a Simpsons episode, no?

    1. check here:…..1.1.1.html

  5. Thank God they’ve solved all the real crime in New York City, leaving the cops with time to deal with stuff like this.

  6. Awesome: those hipster bureaucrats are digging through the used condoms and pill bottles in the couch cushions of Studio 54 in order to find half a Camel butt.

    1. I thought hipsters smoked?

      1. No, they just drink PBR. Smoking’s bad, mm’kay?

      2. Not Public Health hipsters

  7. I’d love to see the expense account for the hipster nannies. Mockery should ensue. FOIA, Reason?

    1. “Boss, I had to have that Prada bag! If I had had a knockoff they woulda ‘made’ me!”

  8. Right now I’m laughing at the NYC edition of 21 Jump Street but I wonder where this is going to lead. It seems to me that this could become a replay of Prohibition, complete with the bloodshed.

    Why don’t these Big Government types ever fucking learn?

    1. this could become a replay of Prohibition, complete with the bloodshed

      What’s wrong with bloodshed?

      1. The blood shed under prohibition was not largely the blood of those who deserved it.

        1. I learned by watching old movies that it was mostly gangsters killing other gangsters. No?

  9. It would be a terrible tragedy if the affected businesses simply closed up shop and moved to a somewhat less-assholish place to do business, wouldn’t it? Terrible.

    How anyone chooses to live and work in Bloomberg’s New Joke is beyond me.

  10. Well, as long as Detective Tom Hanson is on the case, I’m okay with it. I know he’ll put this thing to rest with a flashy, spandex outfit and a Scissor Sisters chase scene.

  11. I don’t know what makes them think prohibition will work any better than it did the first time around.

    Smoking in society should be totally a matter of etiquette. Smokers ask if anyone nearby would mind if they smoked. If anyone objects, they have a right to say so.

    As far as private businesses, I’m with free enterprise here. Let them decide for themselves if they want to allow smoking.

    1. The other side of the etiquette coin, of course, is that nonsmokers don’t get to behave like whiny children at the slightest whiff of cigarette smoke. You’re not entitled to live in a bubble, or to be rude to other people because of their habits.

      1. Oh yes we do.

        Now, go to your room, young man, and think about your nasty habit! And don’t roll your eyes at me!

        1. That doesn’t sound like our Tony. He loves Big Nanny.

          1. You just think I do because you have a stereotype of liberals in your head. I am opposed to most nanny-state nonsense. My attitude about this solidified when I lived in Britain… It really did feel almost oppressive there.

            1. et tu, tony?

            2. I am opposed to most nanny-state nonsense.

              Don’t you suppose, Tonito, that the oppressive nanny state in Britain might have just a little something to do with socialized medicine?

                1. And we were so close, too.

    2. My friend who owns a small restaurant, to which I no longer go every morning for coffee, agrees with you.

  12. What makes this particularly stupid is that unlike alcohol prohibition, the explicit rationale behind banning smoking in restaurants and bars was that it was unfair to involuntarily expose employees and patrons to cigarette smoke. But the premise of these sting operations is that people are smoking, but apparently neither the patrons nor management are sufficiently bothered by it to stop the smokers. So even assuming the rationale for the ban was justified (I think it wasn’t), I cannot for the life of me see why they need to enforce it through undercover means.

    1. Oh c’mon Kiwi, stop trying to make sense out of nonsense. You expect professional nannies to be rational?

  13. I expect these faux-hipsters to be outed by covert flashmobs tracking their every move, asking them leading questions about Guster, and scrutinizing the vintage of their pork-pie hats.

  14. the health department “has deputized a team of inspectors?many of them younger and hipper-looking than the stereotypical bureaucrat

    Tall order.

    Like we need another reason to beat up hipster douchebags.

  15. I am so glad I moved out of Manhattan right after Mikey moved in. Shit, he only lived two blocks away from me; I think his mere presence unconsciously drove my decision to leave.

    1. Bruce Ratner would have asked you to leave eventually, anyway.

  16. Smoking is a gateway drug. Let these hipsters get away with it, the next thrill they’ll be craving is salt. Before you know it, they’re mainlining transfats.

    How about a remake of “Footloose” with New York teens sneaking off to practice smoking and unhealthy eating behind the backs of their repressed puritanical New York elders? With John Lithgow as Michael Bloomberg and Kevin Bacon as the bacon!

  17. Sometimes I think about people who work at bars and nightclubs who get cancer from the carcinogens in second-hand smoke. Ha! Sucks to be them! If they don’t like it, they should work somewhere else. Next time you see someone with emphysema lung cancer, light one up in the name of freedom.

    1. You are absolutely correct; they can go work somewhere else. I see no reason why an employee working voluntarily in a smoking establishment should be able to dictate the behavior of the customers. No more than a waiter with a peanut allergy should be able to prohibit a restauraunt from serving patrons PBJs and chicken satay.

    2. light one up in the name of freedom.

      Or liver disease ’cause they drank too much or ate too much fatty food. Or a missing limb because they were a free-climber who had an accident. Or burn victim over 90% of the body because they raced cars. Or someone dead from massive head trauma because they like to go 90mph in a teeny little sled in an icy tube.

      Have fun in the name of freedom!

    3. Except not one case of lung cancer can be linked exclusively to 2nd hand smoke. So go suck a dick if you don’t like cigarettes.

  18. Sorry, I meant emphysema OR lung cancer. But if they’ve got both, light up two!

    1. I hope you get both.

  19. So now “ability to pass face control” is a job requirement for the NY health bureau goons? Are they going to start writing off Italian suits?

  20. If you hire only smokers, what is the chance you are endangering them with a little bit of second hand smoke? Just today some jackass was at the capitol trying to extend LA’s ban to bars and casinos. I am still wondering where the money is in the anti-tobacco crusade.

    1. Patio bars!

  21. Your right to smoke in public spaces ends where my lungs begin.

    1. Does someone need to remind you that restaurants are private spaces? As in owned and operated by someone other than you? I suppose that would fall on deaf ears…

      1. They used to be private. The state assumed defacto control long ago. Health inspections, fire ordinances, smoking bans, handicapped access, zoning, licensing…

        1. True.. and a brings up relevant point. The state’s job is to protect me from risks that I cannot foresee or control. i.e. It probably makes sense to require that if I plan to invite strangers into my business, that it’s rafters aren’t likely to collapse. The essential difference with those who lean left is the notion that most if not every aspect of life is equally out of our control, and in this scenario there is no limit to depth of the state’s intrusion.

    2. Your right to breathe pristine air in public spaces ends at my smoke.

      It’s easily avoided and identifiable both visually and by smell.

    3. Indoors, I’ll let the owner of the establishment determine that.

      Outdoors, unless specifically prohibited by law, tough titties John.

  22. Someone’s finally openening up Smoke-easies? This is fuckin’ cool!

    Seattle did a story where ‘speakeasy’ restaurants were starting up, but they were totally thematic, which just pissed me off more. Basically, a bunch of hipsters would wear ‘prohibition era clothes’ and go to their respective smoke-free, certified organic, two-drink limit restaurants to feel like they were living the ‘underground’ lifestyle. I threw up in my mouth a little.

    1. For the love. You had a good comment going there, and then…

  23. So what, they put a little product in this guy’s hair, give him a fauxhawk, spray him down with Axe bodyspray and send him out on the streets?

  24. If I worked the front door of this club, I wouldn’t let you in unless you were lit up, and actually proved that you could inhale smoke without throwing up. Wanna get in the club? Inhale deeply… hold it…

  25. From the comments here and across the internet it appears Americans are rebelling against these new moral prohibitions……its about time as many of us have been fighting the bans these past years alone and without funding yet the american peoples freedom from oppression has awoken and freedom is the rallying cry against this mew world order……I say congrats america now lets defeat this nanny state enemy as a unit.

    1. Sure thing. You take point.

  26. Just another reason to love Nevada.

  27. New ……….my baaaad duh!

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