Family Issues

Huckabee Gets Biblical

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In a Beliefnet interview, Mike Huckabee elaborates on his comment that "what we need to do" is "amend the Constitution so it's in God's standards." He says he was referring specifically to amendments banning abortion and defining marriage as a union between one man and one woman:

People sometimes say we shouldn't have a human life amendment or a marriage amendment because the Constitution is far too sacred to change, and my point is, the Constitution was created as a document that could be changed. That's the genius of it. The Bible, however, was not created to be amended and altered with each passing culture. If we have a definition of marriage, that we don't change that definition, that we affirm that definition. And that the sanctity of human life is not just a religious issue. It's an issue that goes to the very heart of our civilization of all people being equal, endowed by their creator with alienable [sic] rights of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. That was the point. The Bible was not written to be amended. The Constitution was….

I don't think that's a radical view to say we're going to affirm marriage. I think the radical view is to say that we're going to change the definition of marriage so that it can mean two men, two women, a man and three women, a man and a child, a man and animal. Again, once we change the definition, the door is open to change it again. I think the radical position is to make a change in what's been historic.

If "the Bible was not written to be amended," what's the New Testament all about? And if Huckabee wants to stick with the biblical definition of marriage, why does he imply that a marriage consisting of "a man and three women" is some newfangled challenge to the family arrangements endorsed by God? According to the Bible, Abraham sired one son with Hagar (his concubine) and one with Sarah (his full-fledged wife) while they were both living and had more children with Keturah after Sarah's death. Jacob had two wives (Rachel and Leah) and two concubines (Bilhah and Zilpah) at the same time, producing children with each of them. Moses apparently had two wives (Ziporrah and "the Ethiopian woman"). David and Solomon each had a bunch. (More examples here.) As far as abortion goes, the Bible (the "Old Testament" part, at least) has nothing clear to say about it one way or another. It seems Huckabee, despite his firm stance against amending the Bible, is doing exactly that, based on his own moral intuitions, and he wants to treat the Constiution in a similar manner.

NEXT: Human/Animal Chimeras, Oh My!

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  1. We could be thankful that the President has virtually nothing to do with amending the Constitution.

  2. I had something witty and insightful to say, but I’m just going to boil it all down to:

    This guy is a fucking boob.

  3. I also affirm the stoning of adulterers, and occasional plagues of locusts

  4. Oh great, here comes a bunch of comments on how adam and eve are the “true” template for marriage and God’s “real” meaning is one woman, one man, and every polygamist in the Bible had family problems, and a bunch of comments on inconsistent fairy tales, and how religion is the worst abomination ever on the face of the universe.

    Did I miss anything?

    🙂

  5. Repeat after me –
    Ignorant, hillbilly, whack job, preacher.
    Ignorant, hillbilly, whack job, preacher.
    Ignorant, hillbilly, whack job, preacher.
    Ignorant, hillbilly, whack job, preacher.
    Ignorant, hillbilly, whack job, preacher.
    Ignorant, hillbilly, whack job, preacher.

  6. If you all would have just been reasonable and let the christers have it their way, this wouldn’t be happening. God wouldn’t be offended and The Incredible Huck wouldn’t be foreordained of God to be the next potus.

    can I get an amen?

  7. bunch of comments on inconsistent fairy tales

    There you go with that “marriage is between one man and one woman” meme again.

    😉

  8. Paging the Usual Screamers!
    Paging the Usual Screamers!

    It’s time to loudly and repeatedly state your views while pretending to have a discussion!

  9. I never thought I would outlive the institution of marriage…but with 50%+ divorce rates and begging for legislative shelter, maybe these are the last gasps.

    Shit, who can even *afford* to get married anymore?

  10. I think the word “alienable” in Huckabee’s speech might be one of those times when he accidentally makes his true beliefs known.

  11. Of course he has to mix in “Man and a Child” and “Man and an Animal” to the arguement.

    Cause, you know, there are all those folks lobbying for child marrage and beast-human marrage and all.

  12. If what’s-His-name is so doggoned omnipotent, why doesn’t He just smite the wicked on his own initiative, without a Constitutional Amendment?

  13. I think he should get some cred for at least calling for a Consitutional amendment. Its been 100 years since anyone thought it was necessary to do that in order for the federal government to do something beyond its enumerated powers.

  14. R C Dean,

    Dito. While I don’t agree with Huckabee’s suggestions, ammending the Constitution is better than ignoring it.

  15. If Huckabee gets nominated by Repubs, I swear I’m not going to bother voting in the general election.

  16. “If “the Bible was not written to be amended,” what’s the New Testament all about?” That’s what conservatism is all about: you fight like hell any innovation, and then when it comes to past and becomes an accepted backdrop of society, you fight like hell against any attempt to change the very thing you (or people like you) once fought like hell to prevent from ever coming to pass.

    Conservatives 80 years ago: Contraception is an evil, immoral affront to God and morality in society.

    Conservatives now: Oh, of course we are not against contraception, but abortion is an evil, immoral, affront to God and morality in society.

  17. Hagar never really caught on as a woman’s name.

  18. So I guess when Satan offered to give Jesus the power to use the state to force people to follow God’s law, Jesus was immoral to turn him down?

    God must be very happy to have servants like Huckabee that are willing to reject Jesus’ teachings and follow Satan’s instead.

  19. Here’s an idea: How about God’s people follow God’s laws, and the rest of us can do what we like and just burn in hell after we die?

  20. I mean, even if we heathens DO follow the divine law (or Huckabee’s interpretation), we’ve still got that whole original sin thing hanging over our heads. So, why bother?

  21. Regis Carnifex | January 18, 2008, 6:11pm | #

    Here’s an idea: How about God’s people follow God’s laws, and the rest of us can do what we like and just burn in hell after we die?”

    Hellfire!

    As a believer, I’d settle for His people following His laws. The rest is umm, well, not of great importance.

  22. The whole “log in my eye” thing. you know?

  23. So he wants to amend the Constitution, fine. What I want to know is if he has READ the Constitution.

  24. The gentleman has read The Bible. Isn’t that enough?

  25. I want to be able to fuck my brother’s wife, if he dies.
    That’s why I’m voting for Huckabee!

  26. Malto Dextrin,

    That’s after the brother dies?

    I gotta talk with my brother.

    and my wife…

  27. …the Constitution was created as a document that could be changed.

    The problem isn’t with the idea of changing the Constitution, it is with trying to use it as Superlaw, a higher level of statute that serves the same basic purpose as ordinary legislation, only more so.

    The Constitution was created to establish – and then severely restrict in scope – a government for the U.S.; attempts to amend it to restrict the activities of individuals, however cleverly worded those attempts may be, are in violation of the spirit and purpose of the document. While not, strictly speaking, “unconstitutional”, such amendments are in my opinion contemptible.

  28. I can’t think of a more fundamental way to violate the separation of Church and State, as by saying the Constitution needs to be “amended so as to suit God’s standards.” What Hukabee is really saying is to amend it so as to suit his particular beliefs and views about what he thinks God’s standards are.

    Suppose you believe in a pragmatic God who thinks abortion is all right if there are too many mouths to feed and not enough food, but wrong if there is enough? Or maybe God is really a libertarian after all. Ya never know!

  29. Conservatives 80 years ago: Contraception is an evil, immoral affront to God and morality in society.

    Conservatives now: Oh, of course we are not against contraception, but abortion is an evil, immoral, affront to God and morality in society.

    80 years ago, conservatives were against abortion too — and the women’s rights movement was one of the most vocally anti-abortion sectors of American society.

    TBH, Mr Nice Guy, I don’t really know where you’re going with this.

  30. I’m still not sure where Huckabee is trying to go with the “Bible is not supposed to be amended” thread. I mean, I agree with him on that, but I don’t see how he gets from there to the idea that the Constitution needs to be brought in line with the Bible.

    I support an amendment making clear that a state that doesn’t consider same-sex unions to be marriages need not recognize a same-sex “marriage” performed in another state. That’s due to federalist concerns.

    I support the Human Life Amendment based on the secular arguments for life beginning at conception, which applies no matter what one’s religious beliefs are.

    But I definitely don’t think we should alter the constitution for truly religious reasons.

  31. As a Christian, I would be interested to learn what part of the Bible commands, implies, or otherwise refers to what Mr. Huckabee proposes.

    (To spare anyone unnecessary labor, I am already familiar with passages that seem to imply the contrary.)

  32. The Bible, however, was not created to be amended and altered with each passing culture.

    I don’t know if it “was created to be amended” but it has been altered numerous times. What we know as the four gospels were not the only gospels floating around during christianity’s infancy. Other gospels existed but were eventually excluded.

    Then there’s the Apochraphal books. Since he’s an ordained minister, I think he’s aware of all this but feels it’s too complicated to explain to his supporters, who likely believe there is only one true bible.

    Since I’d rather have even Hillary as president, keep digging Mike. People need to know what you believe about God and how it relates to the United States.

  33. brotherben:

    Yep, after your brother dies, you get to take his wife for yourself.
    And your current wife doesn’t get to vote on this, either.
    It’s in the bible, god said it, that settles it!

  34. And then the pro-Huckabee people can’t understand why the rest of us think this guy is a Talibangelist loon.

  35. I want to be able to fuck my brother’s wife, if he dies.

    When following his condemnation of polygamy by associating them with child molestation and bestiality, Huckabee forget to mention this group of upstanding citizens:

    I want to be able to fuck my brother’s wife, if he she dies.

    Cause if you’re gonna make yourself persona non grata in Utah, why not go whole hog?

  36. “Conservatives now: Oh, of course we are not against contraception…”

    Many conservatives are against contraception. Why else did the Bush administration stall so long before approving the morning-after pill?

  37. Just to clear things up…

    If anyone looks back through history, marriage between a man and multiple women or a woman and multiple men was done so in order to aid in the survival of their people. That, and it’s also a culturally different world we’re living in as Americans. We aren’t in the Middle East, remember that. And thirdly,it does not say in the Bible, “marry multiple women” but it makes references to people in the Bible having multiple spouses. Also, in the beginning God created Adam and Eve and made them man and woman. Reference to spouses may not have been clearly made here to the average person’s eyes, but there is definite reference to gender relationships. Just make sure the commentary doesn’t over step it’s research. Anyone can read the Bible and see what you saw, but a studied individual can see it’s intentions.

  38. Uh so your claiming the whole “one man + one woman” thing is based on Adam and Eve?

    So because only two people existed in this fairy tale doesn’t that kind of uh . . . make anything else impossible?

    Then in the rest of the bible (stories) when it is possible it sure was practiced by the “holiest” of men.

  39. Jacob, you want him to think too hard. He can’t do it.

    Mike talks to God, you know, and Mike does what he’s told to do.

  40. Er, it’s not necessary to disparage the Bible to skewer Huckabee here. Even assuming the Bible justifies all the positions he outlines, the Bible should absolutely not be the guide for the constitution. With apologies to brotherben, can I get an amen?

  41. “Yep, after your brother dies, you get to take his wife for yourself.”

    Not “get to,” “have to.” It’s not as strange as it sounds, if you consider that women at the time the Bible was written had no source of independent income. If your sister-in-law is widowed, she is destitute and her children have no father, so you step in to provide for her.

  42. crime, selah sez I.

  43. Anyone can read the Bible and see what you saw, but a studied individual can see it’s intentions.

    Sorry, Ashley, but every bible thumper from St. Paul to Rev. Jim Jones to Mike Huckabee has claimed to “see its intentions.”

  44. Not “get to,” “have to.” It’s not as strange as it sounds.

    I agree, it does make sense in the context of the culture and environment of tribal, semi-nomadic desert dwellers. And it has certain almost Heinleinian aspects that are OK with me, except for the compulsory nature of the relationship.

    But Huckabee and is fellow fundmentalists won’t support it, which makes them hypocrites, and they certainly don’t take things like this in context, which is even worse when you consider they will be making policy for us 21st century urban dwellers.

  45. they will be making policy for us 21st century urban dwellers

    …to another century.

  46. Or just stay put, and let the Bronze Age return on its own.

  47. Ever get the feeling that our generation should be let no where near a constitutional convention?

    I would not even trust Reasonoids with amending that document and you are much closer to my political persuasion than the general population.

    What we need is a Mexican standoff, or a cold war, if you will, where each political demographic can deliver hell fire and brimstone to every other demographic if there is even the scent of a constitutional convention in the air.

    Until the day our public school system and brain dead mainstream media is on the trash heap of history we are shit out of luck in hoping any sensible amendments are put forth and put into action.

  48. Amen, crimethink.

    I tend to think someone this theocratic can’t win the nomination, let alone the general. Wasn’t the Federal Marriage Amendment a resounding failure? I doubt our “alienable” rights are going away anytime soon.

  49. Every time one of these amending the constitution based on Christian tenets or biblical interpretation discussions gets going, just swap Koran/Bible; Allah/God; Mohammed/Christ and Muslim/Christian (Jew). It cuts right to the batshit craziness of the matter.

  50. horsewithnonick, many constitutions of states of the US read like statute books — NY’s, for instance.

    Anyway, stuff like revealed here is why I can’t get up any fear of Huckabee. The stuff that he wants and is bad, he has no chance of ever enacting (like for instance, Constitutional amendments, which POTUS has no binding say in), while the stuff that he wants and is good, has a chance. It’s still only Giuliani, McCain, and Clinton that frighten me.

  51. Guiliani’s done. McCain got his voters.

  52. It’s still only Giuliani, McCain, and Clinton that frighten me.

    Speak for yourself, Robert. Huckabee didn’t fry your best friend in a popcorn maker.

  53. J sub D had it right. And anybody who’d vote for Huckabee is kindly invited to fuck right the hell off.

  54. I want to be able to fuck my brother’s wife, if he she dies.

    Cause if you’re gonna make yourself persona non grata in Utah, why not go whole hog?

    Reminds me of a Hustler (like Playboy, I only read it for the porn, the articles are terrible) cartoon where a guy is complaining to another inmate, ‘Jeez, fuck one dead body and they brand you for life.’

  55. If I read the Bible correctly, God was rather pissed when with Sarah and Abraham with the Hagar incident. And that David’s (and Solomon’s) polygamy led to their downfalls…

  56. If “the Bible was not written to be amended,” what’s the New Testament all about?

    Well, there is this:

    Do not think that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets. I am not come to destroy, but to fulfill. For amen I say unto you, till heaven and earth pass, one jot, or one tittle shall not pass of the law, till all be fulfilled. – Matthew 5:17-18

    Jews wouldn’t think so, but Christians don’t think anything in the New Testament actually contradicts the Old.

    As an apostate raised Catholic, what I find amusing about the Huccubus is that he, and any other Protestant clergyman or layperson, could be seen as incorrectly interpreting his god’s law. If the bible is to be compared to the Constitution, then each of the hundreds of Christian sects operating in the U.S.A. is like a supreme court unto itself. Now, we know that our conservative friends are strongly in favor of following the original text of our secular law, discovering its original meaning and reading it within the proper historical contexts. In the eyes of a Roman Catholic or an Orthodox Christian, Protestants are like activist justices, feeling free to find anything in the scriptures that they please, while ignoring tradition and the teaching authority of the church hierarchy.

    I think it’s all unnecessary pilpul, and I don’t think one sect or another is “correct” in its particular interpretation, but as long as the theocratically inclined keep bringing their beliefs up as a basis for secular law, they need to be swatted down.

    And the devil can quote scripture…

    Kevin

  57. Holy Huck.

  58. I’m still not sure where Huckabee is trying to go with the “Bible is not supposed to be amended” thread. I mean, I agree with him on that, but I don’t see how he gets from there to the idea that the Constitution needs to be brought in line with the Bible.

    Maybe it’s a subtle attack on Romney and Mormonism. You know, that whole Book of Mormon thing.

  59. well, jesus huckin christ!

  60. I must have missed the verse where Jesus said, “The government ought to…”

    But on the subject of a man with more than one wife the Bible is quite clearly opposed. “No man can serve two masters…” 😉

  61. kevrob,
    Same here. While not particularly religious, I always like to point out to anti-papist Protestants things that are rather inconvenient to them. My favorite is when they complain about how Catholics supposedly are at odds with the Bible, and I point out how all but a few parts compiled at a Church Council in the 200s or 300s AD form pretty much the entire modern Bible. Then I piss them off further by saying I really don’t give a damn either way.

  62. Remember the phrase ” endowed by their CREATOR with certain unalienable rights”? It seems that non other than our FOUNDING FATHERS shared Huckabee’s “strange” belief that there is such a thing as “divine law” and that those of us who would write constitutions and create societies ought to do so in accordance with those timeless principles.

  63. >R. Totale | January 18, 2008, 6:07pm |
    >Hagar never really caught on as a woman’s name.

    Depends on where you are. I work for a company in Tel Aviv, there are at least three Hagars in my (fairly small) office.
    Make of that what you will.

  64. If I read the Bible correctly, God was rather pissed when with Sarah and Abraham with the Hagar incident. And that David’s (and Solomon’s) polygamy led to their downfalls…

    Actually, I thought it was the adultery and coveting other men’s wives that got those fellas into trouble, not the polygamy.

  65. Yep, I’m with Franklin Harris. The Mormons are the only major religion who could be said to have “amended” the Bible. It was a poke at Romney, in code… but it won’t have gone over the heads of many of the voters Romney and Huckabee are competing for.

  66. If you read 1 Corinthians 7 you’ll see that marriage is hardly the most Christian thing to do. The Christian thing is to live like a monk or a nun. Marriage is only the second best option if you are a lustful person.:

    “1Now for the matters you wrote about: It is good for a man not to marry.[a] 2But since there is so much immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman her own husband. […] 8Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I am. 9But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion. […] 25Now about virgins: I have no command from the Lord, but I give a judgment as one who by the Lord’s mercy is trustworthy. 26Because of the present crisis, I think that it is good for you to remain as you are. 27Are you married? Do not seek a divorce. Are you unmarried? Do not look for a wife. 28But if you do marry, you have not sinned; and if a virgin marries, she has not sinned. But those who marry will face many troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this.”

    Now I would prefer that Christians tried to live up to this, so they could vanish.

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