National Defense

Imaginary Nanotech of the North Spooks U.S. Defense Officials

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While it isn't a Mooninite level of phony panic, it is pretty amusing: The Associated Press reports on how the U.S. Defense Security Service (a division of the Defense Department) spread false rumors that a common Canadian coin was in fact a nanotech-embedded tracking device meant to spy on U.S. contractors for nefarious purposes.

[Hat tip to reader Jay Weiser.]

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  1. The terrorists truly have won.

  2. Stupid idiots.

    Everyone knows it’s the Toonies [the $2 coin] than have the secret microchip/tracking device/elint/bowel monitor implanted.

  3. The Loonie in my pocket just started talking to me. Damned Canuck menace.

    Not counting you, Aresen, of course.

  4. Diefenbaker Diefenbaker Diefenbaker Diefenbaker Diefenbaker Diefenbaker Diefenbaker Diefenbaker Diefenbaker Diefenbaker Diefenbaker Diefenbaker Diefenbaker Diefenbaker Diefenbaker Diefenbaker Diefenbaker Diefenbaker Diefenbaker Diefenbaker Diefenbaker Diefenbaker Diefenbaker Diefenbaker

  5. Pierre “Gary” Trudeau.

    We should have a contest among the non-Canadians to see who can name the most Canadian prime ministers without looking them up.

    Say, VM, I didn’t know that Elisabeth Shue was the old Burger King girl until the Urkobold posting.

  6. Wasn’t Leslie Nielsen’s brother a PM in the 80’s? I can’t remember without looking it up, though.

  7. Is the Shatner still a Canadian citizen? He’d be a great PM. The song when he takes office? Why, the Star Trek Fightin’ Song, of course!

  8. [putting on Guy Montag cap for the second time today]

    Oh, that’s so cute. The canadians act like they have their own money and an adorable little prime minister.

    OHMYGOD! How it BURNS!!
    [tears the hat off and dumps the bucket of water handily placed nearby with foresight]

  9. Wasn’t Leslie Nielsen’s brother a PM in the 80’s?

    No, but he (Erik Nielsen) was a MP (in the 70s, actually IIRC). From the Yukon.

  10. Bee

    It was Eric Nielsen & he was Deputy PM to Mulroney.

  11. We should have a contest among the non-Canadians to see who can name the most Canadian prime ministers without looking them up.

    I’m a non-Canadian but since I went to school there I probably don’t qualify as one.

    I can probably name them all if I think on it a bit.

  12. Bee: Yukon Eric was Deputy Prime Minister, as well as Government House leader, and leader of the opposition, but not PM.

  13. It was Eric Nielsen & he was Deputy PM to Mulroney.

    Oh, really. That’s after I left.

    Funny, I seem to recall that he was a Liberal. Time does stuff like that to old brains. 🙂

  14. ProGLib – Mr. Crane tipped me off to that.

    But High# was close in guessing, “your mom”.

    um… dumps the bucket of water handily placed nearby with foresight

    um.

    (couldn’t find link to Rollins Band’s, “Thinking Cap”)

  15. Your mom looks like Elisabeth Shue? How. . .Oedipal.

  16. Pro Libertate | May 8, 2007, 3:51pm | #

    “The Loonie in my pocket just started talking to me”

    If it’s saying “85 Cents US. 85 Cents US. 85 Cents US.”, then it is functioning properly.

  17. Dude, your mom’s hot.

  18. Aresen,

    The exchange rate has been even less favorable in the past. I was in Vancouver in 2001 and thought there was an error in my dinner bill. I made things worse by negligently tipping in American numbers with Canadian currency. Sorry!

  19. pssst: Aresen – the one eyed one.

    ProGLib. *shrugs* 🙂

    *goes back to knitting belly-button lint sweater

  20. And a member of Class Mammalia, according to Urkobold.

  21. And a damned prominent member she is, laddie. I’d like to attend her class.

  22. Ah – thanks! I remember my jaw dropping when I heard that Leslie Nielsen’s bro was an actual serious politician. In Canada.

    You know what I like about Canada? I like being able to walk into places without having my handbag pawed and my person scanned. I also like bears. I howled when I saw my first “Attention Aux Ours” sign. Really, wouldn’t just a picture of a mean ol’ scary snarly bear get the point across better than blah blah blah warnings in both English and French?

  23. Oh, and GO DUCKS.

  24. the U.S. Defense Security Service (a division of the Defense Department) spread false rumors that a common Canadian coin was in fact a nanotech-embedded tracking device meant to spy on U.S. contractors for nefarious purposes.

    Anyone who hypes up the capabilities of tiny nanotechnological devices is clearly a shill for Big Miniaturization.

  25. Stevo,

    The CMDF and Raquel Welsh would like to speak with you.

  26. Awesome. DoD is a bunch of monkeys fucking a football.

  27. psst – with Raquel – that’s a shill for Big Bottom (bum cakes and mud flaps division)

  28. I would like to have a miniature Raquel Welch in my pants.

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