Mr. President, Can I Have A Hall Pass?

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These poll questions, via Chris Bowers, simply rule:

Q21. Which of the presidential candidates would…

A) Make the best high school principal?
Clinton: 20%
Giuliani: 16%
Obama: 14%
McCain: 9%
Gore: 8%
Edwards: 6%
Gingrich: 4%
Romney: 2%
Biden: 1%
Huckabee: 1%
Other / Unsure: 19%

B) Be the best contestant on dancing with the stars:
Clinton: 19%
Obama: 18%
Edwards: 9%
Giuliani: 9%
Gore: 6%
Romney: 2%
Gingrich: 2%
McCain: 1%
Biden: 1%
Other / Unsure: 31%

C) You trust the most to babysit your children or children you know:
Clinton: 21%
Edwards: 12%
McCain: 9%
Obama: 8%
Giuliani: 7%
Gore: 6%
Romney: 6%
Gingrich: 3%
Brownback: 1%
Other / Unsure: 28%

As Bowers points out, people seem to want to watch Obama dance but won't let him near their kids. Hey, he is black!

The true answers to these questions are:

Best high school principal: Ron Paul. Show up in class, don't get pregnant, and otherwise do your thing. Will the security guards stop you from toking up in the boys' room? Of course not—the Constitution doesn't allow for security guards!

Best contender on
Dancing With the Stars: It's a contest where you need to change styles and pretend that you're an expert at every one? Obviously, Mitt Romney.

Best babysitter: Obama'll have the best bedtime stories, but Giuliani will be the best disciplinarian. Two words: toilet plungers.