CBP Protects the Nation From the Terrifying Threat of Canadian Pot Smokers

Paramount PicturesParamount PicturesI think it would be fair to say that Americans, by and large, are not afraid of Canadians, who have a reputation for politeness and mildness, or pot smokers, who are perceived as friendly and peaceful at best and indolent at worst. But at the intersection of those two groups, according to Customs and Border Protection (CBP), is an intolerable threat to national security. Offering advice to Canadians who are contemplating a trip across the border to try some of Washington's newly legal marijuana, Global News notes that mentioning the purpose of such an excursion to a border agent, or even admitting past marijuana use, is enough to be excluded from the United States. For life.

According to the Department of Homeland Security, which includes CBP, "Anyone who is determined to be a drug abuser or user is inadmissible. A crime involving moral turpitude is inadmissible, and one of those areas is a violation of controlled substances [law]." A conviction is not necessary, as Jess Goldstein discovered on her way from British Columbia to a music festival in Washington last fall. Goldstein made the mistake of telling a CBP officer that she had smoked pot the week before, as a result of which she was declared persona non grata. Now Goldstein, who owns a cabin in Washington and has an American father, can enter the U.S. only if she applies for a waiver, which costs $600 (plus $75 for a criminal background check) and has to be renewed annually. 

A few years ago, Andrew Feldmar, a Canadian psychotherapist, found himself in the same situation when a border agent with too much time on his hands discovered a journal article in which Feldmar discussed his experiences with LSD—in the 1960s. Last year Myles Wilkinson of Victoria, British Columbia, was prevented from attending the Super Bowl in New Orleans after winning a trip in a fantasy football contest because of a 22-year-old possession conviction involving two grams of marijuana. 

So what's a Canadian pot shopper to do if asked the purpose of his trip to Washington? "Don't lie," an immigration lawyer tells Global News. "But you don't have to answer that question. That is not a question that you are required to answer. You can just say you’'e going shopping and leave it at that."

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  • Jesus H. Christ||

    If the Kanuckistani potheads look like the filthy hippy in the picture, I say 'keep 'em out'.

  • waffles||

    I still can't believe some people haven't seen Trading Places.

  • Ska||

    Lionel Joseph?

  • Protagoronus||

    Looking good Billy Ray!

  • Brett L||

    Feeling good, Louis!

  • ||

    ...Canadians, who have a reputation for politeness and mildness...




    I've lived in Canada and know quite a few Canadians, so I'm not exactly sure whence this reputation comes.

  • WTF||

    Yeah, it's like people have never seen a hockey game.

  • ||

    They say sooorry so frequently.

  • ||

    Come to Quebec and see how polite we are.

    And customer service in Canada blows.

  • ||

    I blame French.

  • ||

    Actually, on the last project I worked on in Toronto the Superintendent was French Canadian and the firm that had been retained to do the construction engineering was based in Montreal. When introducing me to the engineer in Montreal the Super said "He's OK he's an American."

  • ||

    Non-dumbasses have no problem with Americans and love America.

  • ||

    "He's OK he's an American."

    I've heard that before and find it entertaining.

  • ||

    But have you heard it in a French accent?

  • Loki||

    How could anyone who says things like "aboot" instead of "about" and calls everyone "buddy," "pal," or "friend" possibly be anything but polite?

  • John Galt||

    I lived in Canada and have known more than a few Canadians eager to start fist fights for the sake of a fight. Being American I expect that's polite enough.

  • wareagle||

    A crime involving moral turpitude is inadmissible

    even in states where it's not a crime, apparently.

  • Jaybirdmojo||

    Turpitude abides.

  • Rich||

    I'm sorry, but anyone who drinks that stuff should just not be allowed in.

  • Zeb||

    It's still a federal crime and that's who the border patrol works for.

  • Zeb||

    Goldstein, who owns a cabin in Washington and has an American father

    Wouldn't it be easier to get a US passport than the waiver in that case?

    Canadians like to do the same to Americans with DUI convictions.

  • ||

    Wouldn't it be easier to get a US passport than the waiver in that case?

    Wouldn't he have to deal with FATCA then?

  • ||

    She, sorry.

  • grrizzly||

    Aren't there like five banks in Canada altogether? They probably all comply.

  • ||

    Well seven big players. Six are Schedule 1 and one is Schedule 2. Then there are all sorts of provincial credit unions.

  • ||

  • grrizzly||

    This is exactly the provision that would have made Obama not a US citizen if he had been born outside of the US.

  • IceTrey||

    Why would anyone travel from B.C., an area famous for it's awesome weed, to buy over priced Washington weed?

  • PD Scott||

    The grass is always greener?

  • Sunmonocle Backwards Tophat||

    I remember reading about drug runners who would strap on a backpack in BC and run it through the mountains and forests into Washington. The consequences of getting caught are steep, but otherwise, you're basically paid to do an adventure race.

  • Lord Humungus||

    With all their beady little eyes, And flapping heads so full of lies!

  • Rich||

    "You can just say you’'e going shopping and leave it at that."

    "Subject attempted well-known evasion tactic and was therefore excluded."

  • ||

    "I think it would be fair to say that Americans, by and large, are not afraid of Canadians, who have a reputation for politeness and mildness,"

    Yeah? Well, you'd better be afraid. Eat shit. /flicks cigarette butt in Yanks face.

  • Rich||

    "Fucking North Americans."

  • PD Scott||

    I don't understand: the CBP agent asked her if she had smoked pot recently and she told the truth?!.

    I attended a talk given by a CBP officer a few years ago. He told us that CBP unofficially sees it's mission as keeping everyone possible out of the US.

  • Rasilio||

    "Border Patrol Protects the Nation From the Terrifying Threat of Canadian Pot Smokers"

    Justin Beiber is proof that they are doing a shitty job of it

  • Obama's Buttplug||

    Well if it can keep out just one Justin Bieber...

  • Swiss Servator, Alles Klar||

    CBP Protects the Nation From the Terrifying Threat of Canadians Pot Smokers

    Now, I might approve of just that...

  • ||

    A few years ago, Andrew Feldmar, a Canadian psychotherapist, found himself in the same situation when a border agent with too much time on his hands discovered a journal article in which Feldmar discussed his experiences with LSD—in the 1960s.



    Sounds like about half the student body of the University of Saskatchewan (including a Mormon I met who played on the school's hockey team*), who participated in trials with LSD in the 1950s under this guy.

    *IIANM Dr Hoffer recruited just about all the student athletes at UofS at the time.

  • ||

    recruited for his tests, that is.

  • Dylboz||

    To be fair, Canadia does the same thing to us. A DUI is a barrier to entry, and one must apply for an expensive waiver to enter Mounty country.

  • ||

    Yeah, but until the whole "passport required" it didn't much matter.

    You arrived at the border in your car (in either direction), they asked, "Where were you born?", you replied truthfully, they asked "Purpose of your visit?", you replied "vacation/visit etc" (unless you were a dumbass), they said "Anything to declare?", you replied, "No" (again, unless you were a dumbass) and they said "on your way, have a nice visit."

  • The Bearded Hobbit||

    Showing my age here but in grade school we were continuously being reminded about "the longest unguarded border in the world".

    ... Hobbit

  • AD-RtR/OS!||

    And the Canadian Border Patrol reciprocates to anyone arriving with an NRA sticker on their car, just to ensure that you're not smuggling guns in for some terrorist/separatist group pissed at Ottawa.

  • pronomian||

    Just go to mexico, say you're name is pacho and you're from honduras escaping gangs and they'll let you in and give you a free ride to washington, but then I'd rather go to Co.

  • BambiB||

    Wait. Her father is American, but she's not an American citizen?

    Wait, we have a flood of women crossing the Southern border so they can drop fetus and declare, "I got me an anchor baby here!"???

    What's wrong with this picture??

  • John Galt||

    Insufficient skin pigmentation?

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