Friday Funnies: The Sequester Diet

Henry PayneHenry Payne

Editor's Note: We invite comments and request that they be civil and on-topic. We do not moderate or assume any responsibility for comments, which are owned by the readers who post them. Comments do not represent the views of or Reason Foundation. We reserve the right to delete any comment for any reason at any time. Report abuses.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    If Obama had a son, it would look like that?

  • KPres||

    No, he would look like Treyvon Martin.

  • Counterfly Guard||

    Pies two weeks in a row, Henry? You're getting worse than Rob Liefeld was with biceps and camel toe.

  • Jordan||

  • WTF||

    I just googled that myself.
    Holy shit.

  • Counterfly Guard||

    I can't believe I hadn't seen that before. My favorite line:

    A fun Liefeld drinking game: take a shot for every pouch he draws on a character. Oh great, now you have alcohol poisoning.

  • SugarFree||

    "How many teeth are in a mouth? Like a billion, right?"

  • ||

    Why did he write "budget" on Chris Christie's shirt?

  • Ska||

    To describe the shirt and why there's a hole in it.

  • Counterfly Guard||

    That's not a hole, it's a mustard flavored ice cream stain.

  • John Galt||

    "Wuggums" that sounds Native American. So the woman in the glasses, the mother of Obama's bastard son Chris Christie, must be Elizabeth Warren.

  • wareagle||

    and there's a visual we all needed.

  • WTF||

    Why is the big fat kid called a 'burp'?

  • John Galt||

    If Obama and my second grade teacher Mrs McGillicutty had a son he would be Chris Christie. And he would like eating pies.

  • Jordan||

    So this is what 7:30 am feels like. Feels bad, man.

  • Ken Shultz||

    I wish we could somehow communicate to people that the sequester isn't big enough to have a significant impact on the budget, either.

    Even if the sequester happens, we'll still spend more money this year than last year, and we'll still spend more money next year than this year, too.

    Sequester or no sequester, the budget will still grow. Guaranteed.

  • wareagle||

    you cannot communicate to those unwilling to hear the message. Team mentality is so entrenched that both sides are blind to reality.

  • Bardas Phocas||

    Let's Move!

    My god! I there is actually a government website for this.
    Featuring that fatass Big Bird!

  • Drake||

    Since when does Congress have a nice rack?

  • Counterfly Guard||

    Since Schumer got elected? '98 I think?

  • Ted S.||

    1998 is when Schumer was first elected to the US Senate. He was first elected to the House in 1981.

    According to Wikipedia, Schumer has held elective office since the age of 24, when he was first elected to the State Assembly.

    I don't think he's done a day of productive work in his life.

  • Counterfly Guard||

    Being a wetnurse is productive work.

  • db||

    This is a man who will be lionized some day as a selfless public servant, who spent his life working for the betterment of all. Only back benchers and bitter clingers will ever point out his shameless pandering to liberal causes while enriching himself and his cronies in big business. He will be remembered publicly as a saint at the end of his career.

    Chew on that for a while.

  • Loki||

    Are you tyring to make us all suicidal? 'Cause that almost does it.

  • SugarFree||

    Since when does Congress have a nice rack?

    Seek help. And this is coming from me. Me. Seek help.

  • ||

    why are Obama and COngress eating a piece of grey felt?

  • Counterfly Guard||

    'Cos they've cricked a gozzle in their tinny shags!

  • Brandybuck||

    Is Mrs. Gress sitting in her salad?

  • Silent Cal||

    When did Congress and Obama get together and make a budget?

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    "Uh… um… when a president… needs to prove to a congress that he’s actua- When a president loves a congress, and he actually wants to make love, uh, to her, something very, very special happens. And with deep, deep concentration and, and great focus, he’s often able to achieve an erec-"

  • Mr Whipple||


    Anti-troll law in Illinois:

  • sarcasmic||

    Those jerks who wrote the Federalist Papers should have been jailed!

  • Counterfly Guard||

    Not to mention The Protocols of the Elders of Zion!

  • Marshall Gill||

    Holy Science! Wasn't there a pamphlet written by an anonymous author during the Revolution?

  • Counterfly Guard||

    Yeah, and look how terribly that turned out.

  • db||

    Why can't everybody just say popular things in public? Then we'd never have to throw anyone in jail for sedition. They bring it on themselves.

  • Ted S.||

    Why don't you care about the children?

  • General Butt Naked||



  • The Late P Brooks||

    Shouldn't the filling of that pie be thousand dollar bills?

  • Jack the Reaper||

    It's blood and flesh...about a pound of flesh. Signifying what each of us as Americans contribute to our all-knowing leaders.

  • Loki||

    This must be what going mad feels like.

  • Paul.||

    Obama should have had a wine glass on the table, containing the blood of the innocent.


Get Reason's print or digital edition before it’s posted online

  • Progressive Puritans: From e-cigs to sex classifieds, the once transgressive left wants to criminalize fun.
  • Port Authoritarians: Chris Christie’s Bridgegate scandal
  • The Menace of Secret Government: Obama’s proposed intelligence reforms don’t safeguard civil liberties