Remy: NoMargaritasville (Jimmy Buffett Parody)

Drinking outside would be OK if the government considered you an adult.


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Some people claim that there's a woman to blame. But we know it's the government's fault.

"Margaritaville" parody written and performed by Remy; music tracks, mastering, and background vocals by Ben Karlstrom; video produced by Meredith and Austin Bragg.

I've got more ice than Sweden
More Maker's than Eden
More 12-year-old whites than Prince Andrew

I've got more melon squeezings
Than a Redskins team meeting
How I'll make rent I haven't a clue

Wasting away here in NoMargaritasville
Wishing I could sell cocktails-to-go
But the government claims we'd be a gross kind of place
Just like these where you can drink outdoors

I've got swanky Bacardi
More Tanq than a SWAT team
More fingers of Johnny than Amber Heard

If there's no ceiling above ya
While you're sipping I'll cuff ya
I guess us going under is what they prefer

Wasting away here in NoMargaritasville
Fully stocked with lost shakers of salt
Some people wail we put too many in jail
Well these laws might be a good place to start

NEXT: Should Libertarians Vote for Biden, Jorgensen, or Trump? A Soho Forum Debate

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  1. How the hell does he keep coming up with these brilliant lyrics? Bravo!

    1. Equally astounding is the genetic defect that appears to endow him with a superhuman resistance to TDS.

      The entire magazine is shouting “Federal troops shouldn’t be arresting peaceful protestors!” and, in the background, Remy is quitely strumming out a “With fewer unneccessary laws, we wouldn’t need as many police.” tune.

      1. Remy is quitely strumming out a “With fewer unneccessary laws, we wouldn’t need as many police.” tune.

        Reason has run more than a few articles saying exactly that.

        1. Reason has run more than a few articles saying exactly that.

          They aren’t going to sleep with you.

          1. And the people you’re trying to impress by constantly dogging on Reason aren’t going to sleep with you either.

            1. Well, given the fact that I didn’t write, let alone think, “Reason has never supported the position Remy is advancing.”, I’m going to go out on a limb and surmise that your projections about my wife’s sleeping habits are similarly spot on.

              So it’s clear, I think it’s truly unfortunate that Reason is unwilling to fuck you for white knighting for them. You deserve better.

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      3. “…superhuman resistance to TDS.”

        I just figured out what exactly it is that I am afflicted with!!!

        EGADS! Eternal Government Almighty Derangement Syndrome!!!

        1. EGADS! Eternal Government Almighty Derangement Syndrome!!!

          Two of the few shining spots that Trump has been cheered for, even backhandedly by Reason, are his reluctance to go to war and his support of criminal justice reform.

          If EGADS is the only thing preventing me from grokking the “If we burn down the courthouse Trump won’t stand on the next George Floyd’s neck.” or even the “If we support protestors in Oregon Trump won’t stand on the next George Floyd’s neck.” narrative, I don’t want to be cured.

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      1. Only $19K a month? What kind of Trump are you?

        1. Low Rent Trump. From the poor side of the family.

    3. He has 536 writers just in DC alone . . .

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  2. Another winner from Remy.

  3. I guess us going under is what they prefer…

    No guessing about it. Most places have been backsliding to prohibition long and successfully enough to know this is an easy sacrifice to force.

  4. Some people claim that there’s a woman to blame.


  5. I guess us going under is what they prefer

    Yeah, probably. Never underestimate the progressive’s hatred for small business people/ entrepreneurs. For all their base’s screeching about “KKKOCHPORAYSHUNZ” progressive politicians love big corporations so long as the “campaign donations” (AKA bribes) keep coming in. Plus an economy with only a few large corporations is easier to control than one with thousands of small businesses doing mostly whatever they want (within reason, of course).

    1. “I guess us going under is what they prefer”
      Only until Election Day. Then President Biden can ride forth and resurrect the economy over eight years, just like it took him that long to do after 2008.

    2. Of course corporations will be loved. Their boardrooms have become like college campuses and will embrace the new culture the left has in store for us. Campuses, boardrooms, media, all have succumbed to the left wing stupidity. They will be the enforcers of thought shrouding the reeducation in D&I seminars.

      They will take down the suburbs, force integration so you can experience the gang problems, end private schooling (except for the oligarchy of course), incorporate small businesses or remove them, infiltrate the military and poilce, and finally once done they will round up those who don’t conform. And the #1 item is going to be gun confiscation (except again for security of the oligarchy). By a decade or two we won’t remember the freedom or expression we used to have. It will be all locked down masked up restricted edited and if you resist even a little welcome to the camps.

  6. Very good, as always. Remy is a treasure.

  7. My baritone ukulele is almost as big as his Mini Martin. (Maybe even the same size.)

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    2. Isn’t that a cello?

      1. Isn’t that a cello?

        Nope. Remy’s is a Mini Martin. Mine’s a Baritone uke.

        1. Your comment is awaiting moderation.
          Since July.27.2020 at 6:22 pm.

  8. These videos are about all Reason is good at anymore. You’re supposed to be a Libertarian publication yet you don’t cover a single Libertarian campaign. Seriously fuck you guys for that! ????????????

  9. Meanwhile, the red neck governor in hillbilly Colorado allows cocktails to be served not only outdoors, but for takeout and home delivery.

    1. Redneck governor? What the HELL are you on?

      For the record, Jared Polis is a doughy gay guy who looks like he hasn’t seen the sun since the Bush administration.

      And Colorado hasn’t been hillbilly since I was a kid. A LONG TIME AGO. It’s cosmo-California 2.0. The “Reason” staff would feel right at home in any number of Colorado cities.

  10. As always, brilliant and on-point!

    You gotta increase the output dude! You are a lone voice in the wilderness, speaking truth not only to power, but to the people as well. I’ve used several of your videos as evangelical material…. successfully!

    1. 1 Remy video balances out the equivalent of 1 Shikha article, or 2 ENB Roundups. So yeah, he needs to increase his output.

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  13. Imagine a Remy Stossel duet!

  14. How is it that Remy’s videos have better external citations than half the Reason articles these days? And not a one of them was a link to Twitter, or a report on happenings on Twitter!

  15. “More 12 year old white than Prince Andrew”
    Bravo sir. Bra-vo!

  16. We do not moderate or assume any responsibility for comments, which are owned by the readers who post them.

    And yet, “Your comment is awaiting moderation” precedes one of my comments (which is visible only to me).

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