Chris Christie

If Chris Christie Becomes Attorney General, Pot Advocacy Could be Set Ablaze

Chris Christie is a notorious pot prohibitionist.



Anti-prohibition activists can breathe a sigh of relief that drug warrior Jeff Sessions has complied with an order to resign from his position as attorney general. But if rumors about his replacement are true, then the sigh may be over before they know it. Two sources have reportedly told CBS that Chris Christie is on the list of names being considered for the job.

The former governor of New Jersey remained adamant for years that pot is a gateway drug. While speaking with an activist in April 2014, Christie promised to never support legalization as long as he was governor. Christie even told New Jersey residents that if legal weed was what they wanted, they could head to Colorado.

Some of them were forced to do exactly that. The parents of Vivian Wilson had to move to Colorado in 2014 in search of a treatment for the young girls' Dravet syndrome, a life-threatening seizure disorder. Her father once asked Christie on camera to sign a bill legalizing medical marijuana in the state, lest his young daughter die:

Christie eventually signed a compromise bill permitting minors to use edibles for medicinal purposes. But after the required process of doctor visits, psychiatric consultation, and registration fees racked up costs of over $1,000, the family made the decision to leave. Christie didn't show much remorse when told that New Jersey's strict medical marijuana process contributed to their decision to leave.

During the 2016 Republican presidential debates, Christie promised to use the federal government to crack down on states that legalized pot. He changed his tune in 2018, however, when he stated that states were free to set their own rules for legalization.

Christie has also described legalization advocates with harsh language, at one point accusing them of wanting to "poison our kids." He has also referred to tax revenue from legal pot sales as "blood money."

On the bright side, in 2013 Christie signed a Good Samaritan bill that shields people who call 911 for drug overdoses from being arrested or prosecuted. The legislation also made naloxone, an opioid antagonist, available to spouses, parents, or guardians.

NEXT: The FDA's Plan to Ban Flavored E-Cigarettes From Most Stores Is Unfair and Dangerous

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  1. “Two sources have reportedly told CBS – – – – – ”

    Fake news. No actual people, no actual facts, no actual news organization.

    And is Christie mentioned because Napolitano has turned it down?

    1. Make me AG. No more pot problems. The progtard problem would also be rapidly reduced.

  2. Food is a gateway drug too . . . to being a fat, disgusting slob. Seriously, when was the last time Christie even saw the end of his own dick?

    1. Doubtful he can even reach it. His pants must reek.

    2. Seriously, when was the last time Christie even saw the end of his own dick?

      Long enough to declare it legally dead.

    3. “Food is a gateway drug too . . .”

      FFS that bastard had beriatric surgery (stomach band) and still is as big as a house.

      Christie does do a hell of a Mr. Creosote impersonation from the Meaning of Life. Just one thin mint.

  3. Relax. The hillbillies and yahoos will be escorted out of town in a couple of years.

    1. and loaded on to boxcars? Taken to camps deep in Holy Russia?

      1. Just sent back to the street pills, dying towns, faith healers, lousy educations, economic inadequacy, cheap sixers, stale thinking, disaffectedness, snuff, grievance fixation, cigarettes, intolerance, etc. whence they came.

        1. So, San Francisco, Chicago, Detroit , or NYC?

        2. Me and my

          comrade Rev. Arthur L. Kirkland

          Are Marching to

          Washington DC

          With pints of

          Ben & Jerry’s #Resistance !

          Oh what fun

          We’ll have

          Him and Me!!

        3. Arty, the moment you and your faggot friends push too hard, you will all come to a horrific end. My only regret is that I will likely not get to see it first hand.

          Or maybe you’re just too much of a coward to actualy do anything. Your Antifa pals don’t appear to do well when it isn’t ten to one odds against some old woman.

          And before you spout on about how smart you think progtard kind is, consider Alexandria Occasio Cortez. This dumb bitch is the future of your party.

  4. Meh. On the one hand, I think I despise Christie more than I do Sessions because I suspect Sessions actually has principles. Fucked up backward abominable principles, but principles. I believe that he stands against MJ legalization on those principles.

    Christie is (from what I can tell) a slimy, no-good, dishonest, corrupt-as-shit political worm. Now that the wind has changed, I will be absolutely un-shocked to see him suddenly willing to cooperate with the legalization effort, as long as he can line some pockets while doing so.

    1. During the 2016 Republican presidential debates, Christie promised to use the federal government to crack down on states that legalized pot. He changed his tune in 2018, however, when he stated that states were free to set their own rules for legalization.

      Sounds like he’s already starting to at least come around to the idea of leaving states that have legalized it alone. I doubt he’ll ever come around fully to the idea of legalizing it on the federal level or removing it from Schedule 1.

    2. He’s an evil-minded little troll, but Sessions apparently does have more integrity than I would have guessed. I have to admit to a certain grudging respect for someone who got kicked out of the Trump administration for not being enough of a partisan hack. I suspect Christie wouldn’t have any such problem.

  5. If Chris Christie Becomes Attorney General, Pot Advocacy Could be Set Ablaze

    It is disappointing because I felt like were were thiiiiis close with Jeff Sessions, and now this mess.

    1. But think of the contact high when Pot Advocacy itself is set ablaze. It just may be worth it.

  6. Moving costs a lot more than $1000.

    1. Your ignoring the cost and hassle of dealing with the bureaucracy, including opportunity cost. Kid’s life is at stake. What value do you put on that?

    2. Not whenbyou consider the vast savings in state fees one gets when leaving New Jersey for the vast majority of states that don’t border New Jersey.

    3. So? Why should this family have to pay a god damn penny to the state to keep their daughter alive? If they are going to fuck with them that much just to get into the program, how much are they going to fuck with them while in it, again just to keep their daughter alive.

    4. Not being in NJ is worth a lot too.

  7. Plenty of interesting political and legal developments, yet the Conspirators are curiously quiet.

    Fears of displeasing the last president to nominate movement conservatives to the federal bench in current professional lifetimes seem to have stilled some keyboards.

    1. When has the (Volokh) Conspiracy ever discussed poorly substantiated rumors of executive appointments? I would love examples.

      1. Never. But the Rev is profoundly stupid but makes up for it by being pig ignorant and having a poor grasp of reality.

        1. Of all the things VC has brought with it, the bigoted Rev is probably the only bad one.

          1. The Volokh Conspiracy is a fine addition to a site whose comments are dominated by the perceived grievances sustained by white, male right-wingers masquerading as libertarians.

            It’s a natural fit.

            Carry on, clingers. Maybe some more moaning about how our strongest schools should emulate our weakest schools by hiring more movement conservatives? You know, affirmative action for clingers.

      2. You don’t remember the Noel Canning discussions?

        The sketchy Whitaker appointment (and the sketchy Whitaker) are far from the only prominent points regarding which the Conspirators seem to have lost their traditional garrulousness.

        In fairness, they may be busy advising vote suppressors efforts in Florida, Georgia, and Arizona.

        1. Quietly puts a dollar in Rev’s cup and avoids eye contact.

          1. He’s just going to use it to buy drugs, you know – that money would be better used if given to a shelter.

            1. I have a soft heart for the crazy and stupid and am a terrible enabler.

            2. Yeah, but on the plus side maybe he’ll get some bad heroine spiked with fentanyl and die.

            3. A shelter? The Rev. Needs hospice.

  8. Whoever is AG will be a dick. It’s the number 1 job requirement.

    1. So true. Sessions, Holder, Ashcroft, Reno….The list sounds like a lineup of DC Comic villains. I think Christie would fit right in.

      1. Maybe he could shave his head to look like Kingpin, or is that Marvel?

      2. Pam Bondi’s on that list, I believe… she don’t look half bad. I hope she gets nominated if anything just for the “AG Barbie” wisecracks.

  9. New Jersey Democrat Chris Christie will bridge the divide between the administration and lawfulness.

    1. He’s only a democrat if you’re outside of NJ looking in. If you compare him with the NJ governors that bookend him (Corzine and Murphy), he’s practically a John Bircher.

      1. Sadly, this also describes Gavin. He’s long been thought of as “San Francisco’s right-wing former mayor.”

  10. I bet if you tried to prohibit pot pie Christie would have you killed.

  11. Worse than that, he will be replacing that notorious libertine Jeff Sessions.

  12. “Anti-prohibition activists can breathe a sigh of relief that drug warrior Jeff Sessions has complied with an order to resign from his position as attorney general. But if rumors about his replacement are true, then the sigh may be over before they know it”

    The primary purpose of any Attorney General, since Watergate, has been to protect the president’s back from investigations that might lead to impeachment. Jeff Sessions was appointed Attorney General because he was just about the only Republican with a future who supported Donald Trump in his campaign–and so Trump thought he could trust him. Sessions tripped that trust up walking in the door. Regardless, Trump did not appoint Sessions because he agreed with Sessions’ positions on anything–especially pot prohibition. Trump campaigned on the idea that the states should be free to set their own policies, and it didn’t matter what Sessions wanted on pot prohibition, Trump imposed his will on that.

    1. So, what other Republicans backed Trump during his campaign? In short, the only Republicans who risked their political futures by supporting Trump in 2016 (except Sessions) were Republicans who had no future to risk: Rudy Giuliani, Sarah Palin, John Bolton, Larry Kudlow, Newt Gingrich, Chris Christie, et. al. Trump didn’t appoint Sessions because he gave a shit about Sessions’ opinion on pot prohibition; He picked him because he thought he could trust him. Trump didn’t elevate Kudlow because he liked Kudlow’s free trade ideology; he needed someone he could talk with about Russia without worrying about his economic advisor throwing him to the wolves in an impeachment hearing.

      If Trump picks Christie to watch his back at the Department of Justice, it won’t be because he gives a shit about Chris Christie’s opinion on anything (like pot prohibition); it’ll be because he trusts Christie to watch his back amid an FBI, Justice Department, et. al. that for all we’ve seen, appears to have been conspiring to keep Trump out of office since before he won the last election. Anybody who wastes any time speculating about whether Trump supports this or that issue because he picks Christie is completely missing the only qualification that really matters, which is loyalty. Christie was loyal to Trump when the rest of the Republican party was al but Never Trump, so Trump feels like he can sleep at night knowing that he’s got a loyal dog guarding his house at night.

      1. Wow. Such a swampy and cynical analysis. Reading this, one would almost think Trump wasn’t the arbiter of change and was just another crummy politician.

        1. They guy just won’t let his enemies indict or impeach him. The nerve of him.

          1. I guess I missed the job description where the AG’s primary task is to protect the president’s back.

            BTW. You’d be shrieking bloody murder here if the team were different.

            1. The AG works for the President. The president has every right to appoint someone loyal to him. You are just butt hurt he won’t appoint an enemy who will launch a witch hunt against him.

              You seem to be under the impression that DOJ is some national secret police that is not accountable to the President. You are wrong in that and thankfully so. DOJ works for the president you authoritarian asshole.

              1. DOJ = POTUS’ Goon Squad = Liberty?

                OK. Sure. Whatever dude.

                1. “DOJ = POTUS’ Goon Squad = Liberty?”

                  Looking at the world the way it really is in no way betrays liberty.

                  If you’re going around telling people that liberty only happens in a morally sterile environment, you’re not doing the movement any favors.

                  Can’t you tell the difference between the way the world is and the way it should be?

            2. “I guess I missed the job description where the AG’s primary task is to protect the president’s back.”

              It’s the first and most important consideration.

              Think of it this way: The FBI doesn’t have the authority to decide whether to indict a former Secretary of State who’s running for president. The decision not to indict Hillary Clinton must have come from Obama’s Attorney General. She’d have screamed bloody murder if the FBI were usurping her authority. She didn’t, and that’s presumably because the FBI was merely announcing her decision.

              Did you know that Barack Obama sent classified emails to Hillary Clinton’s server using a pseudonym? He knew her email server was private and insecure, but he repeatedly sent her classified emails anyway. That’s a crime! Are you so naive as to imagine that the Justice Department’s decision not to prosecute Hillary had nothing to do with the fact that if she were guilty of knowingly sending classified emails to an insecure server, then Obama was guilty, too?

              There’s a real world out there, and it’s much more fascinating than the Pollyanna horseshit you apparently want to believe.

            3. “BTW. You’d be shrieking bloody murder here if the team were different.”

              Ain’t that the truth. People are such fucking cattle it’s a gotdamn shame. Fucking hero worship.

        2. Do people not know that Mueller investigating the FBI is the FBI investigating itself?

          How stupid do you have to be to NOT pick someone to head the Justice Department based primarily on loyalty when Mueller’s over there trying his best to impeach Trump–using the FBI and Justice Department that was working to keep him out of office at the time?

          What kind of fucking idiot wouldn’t take loyalty into consideration in that situation? Is “swampy” some new code word for “not retarded”?

          1. Disaffected, half-educated, bigoted right-wing rubes are among my favorite faux libertarians.

            1. If you still don’t know what an ad hominem fallacy is, then you’re not even halfway educated.

  13. One of the most interesting things about TDS is the way the people with TDS create the circumstances that lead to the situations they want to complain about.

    If Trump can only select from a small handful of Republicans to watch his back, who’s fault is that? Surely, at least some of the blame belongs to Never Trumpers in the GOP. And what do they do? Complain about Trump picking from a small handful of shitheads?

    I can feel sorry for people who make mistakes. People who create the circumstances that lead to their predicament and then complain about the predicament they’re in–as if it’s someone else’s fault? No pity for that kind of assholery.

    So, you dropped out of high school, got a criminal record, got pregnant before you were 20, took every drug that moved past your face–but the reasons you’re not successful are about capitalism and racism?!

    Fuck that. And fuck all the idiots that treat the Russia probe like anything but a farce or were Never Trumpers–and now complain about having to suffer Chris Christie, too. It’s all the same thing.

    1. The Witiker appoint is both hysterical and brilliant. All of Trump’s enemies are having a cow about it. But the only thing they can do about it is confirm whomever Trump appoints to replace Sessions. They don’t want to do that, then Whitiker remains as the acting AG.

    2. Somebody buy Ken a subscription to The Plain Truth magazine…

  14. I’ve heard that thhe mushrooms growing in Christie’s fat folds really get you high.

    1. Does anyone have the stomach to test that theory out? I think I’d rather lick a toad.

  15. Trump is known for liking to have a fat guy around to constantly make fun of, so maybe this will put him off his sour mood.

  16. Give me a break. Sessions was as anti pot as possible.

  17. I wonder how many youths these ku-klux laws against plant leaves have assassinated since 1936? Enforcing felony beer killed a couple of thousand people by 1932 according to Senator Tydings of Maryland. The Gee Oh Pee is the Assassin of Youth if ever there was one.

  18. Perhaps you deserve Chris Christie.

  19. Legalization of weed is a freight train that will run down and crush any politician that stands in the way , even someone with the girth and bulk of Christie.

  20. This fat POS is still around? I thought Trump retired him a long time ago.

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