Donald Trump

Donald Trump's 10 Theses: A Phoenix Rally Quiz

See if you know what's on the president's mind.



The president covered a lot of ground during his 77-minute speech to adoring supporters in Phoenix on Tuesday night. In case you didn't have time to watch or read the whole thing, this quiz is your chance to brush up on the 10 key points he made. Answers after the jump.

1. What don't the fake media want to talk about?

a) anarchists

b) crimes committed by illegal immigrants

c) Barack Obama's birthplace

d) the link between vaccination and autism

2. Where does Donald Trump draw the line?

a) grabbing women's genitals

b) driving an old lady from her home to make room for a casino parking lot

c) mocking disabled people

d) attacking the decency of his supporters

3. Who is trying to take away our history and our heritage?

a) the elites

b) the crooked media

c) anarchists

d) Mexicans

4. How is Donald Trump better than the elite?

a) He went to better schools.

b) He was a better student.

c) He lives in a bigger, more beautiful apartment.

d) all of the above

5. What doesn't Donald Trump understand?

a) comparative advantage

b) how clean coal works

c) how a bill becomes a law

d) why the fake news and the crooked media don't want America to be great again

6. Who is putting all of America's safety at risk?

a) dishonest journalists

b) Democrats

c) anarchists

d) neo-Nazis

7. Who doesn't like our country?

a) Islamic terrorists

b) anarchists

c) dishonest journalists

d) Kim Jong-un

8. What strikes at the heart of America?

a) foreign interference in presidential elections

b) North Korean missiles

c) what happened in Charlottesville

d) too much LDL cholesterol

9. Who is the source of the division in our country?

a) the fake news and the crooked media

b) neo-Nazis

c) anarchists

d) demagogic politicians

10. What is it time for all of us to remember?

a) We are all on the same team.

b) We are all Americans.

c) We all believe right now in America first.

d) all of the above


1. a

2. d

3. b

4. d

5. d

6. b

7. c

8. c

9. a

10. d

NEXT: Were Anti-War Libertarians Gullible for Believing Trump Would Take on the War Party?

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  1. I feel like I barely ever see the media talk about anarchists. Other than Noam Chomsky of course.

    1. Does Reason not win media awards? Is Reason not media? Does Reason not cover anarchists from time to time?

      Ah, I see the problem.

      I feel like …

      Don’t trust your feels.

      1. Does Reason not win media awards? Is Reason not media?

        No, it’s comment board.

  2. Oh fuck, I’m chopped and there is a pop quiz!

    We meet again, good ole college daze O.o

  3. The fake news and the crooked media are responsible for:

    a. War

    b. Cancer

    c. Polio

    d. All of the above

  4. Here’s a harder one.

    The fake news and the crooked media are responsible for:

    a. War
    b. Cancer
    c. Polio
    d. Autism
    e. Alzheimer’s disease
    f. Crusty’s obsession with Lena Dunham
    g. Crusty’s obsession with teachers having sex with students
    h. Crusty’s fantasy of having sex with a student who looks like Lena Dunham
    i. All those lost socks that were eaten by your clothes dryer
    j. Tulpa
    k. Obama’s secret Kenyan Muslim heritage
    l. Donald Trump’s orange toupee
    m. That slow driver in the fast lane on the highway
    n. The reason why your uncle always smelled like booze
    o. Squirrels
    p. Your outrageous cell phone bill
    q. Hard drive crashes
    r. That guy who takes the last puff before you get to have any
    s. That weird sound in your basement that you really ought to look at
    t. The orphans in your basement who just won’t stay quiet
    u. High-fructose corn syrup
    v. People who follow a gluten-free diet who don’t even know what gluten is
    w. That sweaty guy in the gym who refuses to clean off his equipment
    x. Lima beans
    y. Haggis
    z. All of the above

    1. Haggis? Do you mean because it’s normally inflicted on rather than offered to one?

    2. I had to laugh at what you posted. Your normal political comments are shit but your comedy is funny. You deserve a gold star for the work you put in.

    3. Dang.

      Most here don’t put that kind of effort into their serious posts.

      Either that or your weird just flows naturally.

  5. What’s on Trump’s mind? A bad comb-over?

    1. It’s 9:00, my guess is what’s on his mind is a handful of yellow jackets. Or whatever the hell it is he pops to keep him up half the night all twitchy on the twitters. The guy’s a speed freak.

    2. I see what you did. A take off on the old joke…

      “What crosses a bug’s mind when it hits your windshield? … It’s asshole.”

  6. 9 out of 10

    I missed #6

    While Trump is correct that Democrats put all of America’s safety at risk, the majority of “dishonest journalists” make up a subset of Democrats so I was too narrowly focused.

    I watched most of the rally. It was amazing. I think Trump was trying to make up for that godawful speech he had to deliver to try and sell the mini-surge in Afghanistan. He did that in spades but, unfortunately, we’re still stuck with the bad Afghan foreign/military policy. Teleprompter Trump can be good oratory but you can’t trust other people’s words coming out of his mouth. Twitter Trump and Rally Trump are the real deal, at least so far as what he believes.

    1. I especially liked that part where he showed he knows jack shit about what drives economic activity.

      Wait, that’s most other speeches… Maybe I missed ithe speech but really didn’t.

      1. I can honestly and genuinely say that Donald Trump has never, for even a moment, impressed me with either his insight, ability to express it, or ability to read other people’s words.

        Obama’s oratory greatness was basically invented out of thin air by patronizingly racist Democrats, but Donald Trump is legitimately – LEGITIMATELY – on about a 4th grader’s level, both in vocabulary and verbal dexterity.

        The man has the gravitas of a sorority girl on her first drunk.

        1. It’s a GOOD thing.

  7. Thanks for the information… vashikaran mantra for lady

    1. Vashikaran Mantra For Lady was my nickname in college.

  8. Answers:

    Don’t care…

  9. How do his supporters manage to conflate this horrifying display of extreme psychosis with “Fuck yeah, we’re winning!”?

    No respectable country should have more than 10% of its population be this fucking stupid.

    1. Is that a hint you might leave?

    2. How do his supporters manage to conflate this horrifying display of extreme psychosis with “Fuck yeah, we’re winning!”?

      – reason commentariat to Tony, 2008-2016

      1. This equivalency shit is so feeble I’m embarrassed for you.

        1. I’m not making an equivalency – I’m pointing out that you’re an ignorant hypocrite wgho live isn his own self-enforced bubble.

          When you come out of your embarrassment, maybe take another stab at reading comprehension, and logical chains of causality.

          1. I have never and would never support anyone of any party as ignorant, unqualified, and psychologically unstable for president as the current one. You just equated that uniquely ridiculous figure with the last president, who by any objective measure was fine, even if you didn’t like his policy platform.

            You are as deranged as Trump if you actually believe the crap you’re typing.

  10. Is Trump a disaster for libertarians? Sure, but so was Obama. I don’t recall this site harping on him to this extent.

    1. Obama was a disaster policywise. Trump is a disaster as a human being, and snark is a way for sane people to cope.

      1. Trump is super wealthy and has a happy and large family that like him. People that know Trump like him. He out campaigned Hillary and is older than her. He does not drink or smoke.

        He tries to tell Americans what is going on with their government via twitter because the media constantly skews what is happening with his administration.

        Sounds like a disaster to me. /S

    2. Gridlock was the least worst option. SURPRISE! We got that.
      “If at first you don’t succeed, keep on suckin’ til you do. …suck seed.”

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