Obama Ends 'Wet Foot, Dry Foot' Policy for Cubans, Protesters Plan for Trump Inauguration, Consider the Potato Skin: A.M. Links

|

Follow us on Facebook and Twitter, and don't forget to sign up for Reason's daily updates for more content.

NEXT: Oral Arguments Heard in Libertarian Party Lawsuit Regarding Commission on Presidential Debates

Editor's Note: We invite comments and request that they be civil and on-topic. We do not moderate or assume any responsibility for comments, which are owned by the readers who post them. Comments do not represent the views of Reason.com or Reason Foundation. We reserve the right to delete any comment for any reason at any time. Report abuses.

  1. “Effective immediately, Cuban nationals who attempt to enter the United States illegally and do not qualify for humanitarian relief will be subject to removal, consistent with U.S. law and enforcement priorities,” Obama said in a Thursday statement.

    Now that’s how you stop the brown people from coming into the country, DONALD.

    1. Hello.

      SCTV cast member Tony Rosato died.

      http://bit.ly/2jr2G8G

      “In 2005, he was charged with criminally harassing his wife as he struggled with mental illness. He spent two years in a Napanee, Ont., maximum security prison awaiting trial before he was diagnosed with Capgras syndrome, a condition that caused him to believe his wife and young daughter had been replaced by impostors.”

      Damn. RIP. SCTV stayed true until the end.

      1. Spending 2 yrs awaiting trial really fucking socks.

        1. *sucks

          Effin phone

          1. I was wondering if Socks was his cell mate.

          2. Hey, we’re not judging you. Everybody’s got their own thing.

        2. And I should have written, ‘to the end’.

      2. I hate when I get crapgas syndrome.

        /sorry

        1. +1 all-you-can-eat Indian buffet

    2. “Now that’s how you stop the brown people from coming into the country, DONALD.”

      Oh, I thought you did it by playing classical music on the sound system. Or is that malls?

  2. 276) (Part 1) Steven Spielberg’s A.I. was explicitly a retelling of the Pinocchio story, but it’s always struck me that Spielberg completely missed the whole point of Pinocchio. In Pinocchio, the wooden boy becomes a real boy when he learns right from wrong and internalizes a conscience, without needing Jiminy Cricket to tell him. When the Blue Fairy makes him into a real boy at the end, he’s already done the real work?the Blue Fairy is only doing for his body what Pinocchio has done for his soul.

    But at the end of A.I., David (the child-like robot programmed to love) gets his fondest wish?not because he’s been particularly good or learned anything, but just because he wished for it so much. It’s always struck me as a perverse type of misinterpretation emblematic of modern Hollywood liberals like Spielberg. Only an immature or corrupted personality would think the point of Pinocchio was the wishing really hard for something, rather than the learning to act ethically.

    1. (Part 2) Which brings me to this: Obama surprised Joe Biden with the Presidential Medal of Freedom

      Obama is like Spielberg. He believes you don’t have to do the hard work, but just by wishing upon a star, you can get everything you want. And he’s the Blue Fairy! He can give the Presidential Medal of Freedom to Biden, and turn him into a real boy!

      bestowing a?level of veneration that his three immediate predecessors had reserved for only three others ? Pope John Paul II, former president Ronald Reagan and Gen. Colin Powell

      Yeah, those three guys *did* something, and deserved the medal afterwards. But Obama trusts you can give the medal first, and you’ll magically be deserving of it afterwards. Hey, it worked for him with the Nobel Peace Prize, right? I mean, simply receiving it automatically turned him into the kind of world-historical personality who deserves a Nobel Peace Prize. Only somebody like that could lead America to the Pleasure Island where we now find ourselves..

      1. The Biden merit badge was simply political knob-gobbling. They love fawning over themselves.

      2. Yeh, he completely debased it by handing it out like candy to, from what I can see, his friends.

        Lorne Michaels and Ellen de Generes? Wtf?

        1. Lorne Michaels isn’t even American! He’s from Canada! CANADA!!

          1. Know who else is from Canada?

              1. Oh, Good God.

                If asswipes like Fonda keep this shit up, I might actually find myself in the untenable position of defending The Hair That Walks Like A Man?. Why do you hate me, Jane? What did I ever do to you?

      3. Are there more parts? Partially ribbing you (of course and always). But seriously, what about this:

        Blah, blah blah.

        (cont’d)

        Blah, blah blah.

        (end)

        1. But, but…those aren’t numbers!

          1. If you like your numbers, you can keep your numbers.

      4. “Best vice president ever!” Spent more money on Amtrak than any v.p. before him. Spent more time patronizing Indian-owned convenience stores. Spent 45 years in government sucking the taxpayers’ teats.

        1. With not much to show for it. Biden is one of the poorest elected SOBs in the federal government.

      5. “I don’t deserve this,” the vice president said repeatedly.

        He got that bit right, at least.

        He got a medal for doing his job. That seems apposite for this administration.

      6. Joe should turn the medal over and look at the back. He’ll see the word “Participant” stamped there.

        1. Or “Made in China.”

          (You know you’re thinking it…)

      7. Awesome post.

    2. The story was 75% Stanley Kubrick, IIRC. Although I can’t remember if the epilogue was Spielberg. Curiously, the dark and morbid parts were added by Spielberg while the sentimental stuff was from Kubrick.

      1. I’ve been unable to make it through the film because it’s so thoroughgoingly sad. I had always assumed that the darkness was all Kubrick and that Spielberg had added the more sentimental parts. Thanks for the info.

        1. It’s a failure as a movie but it’s forgivable when you consider that Spielberg only took the project as a tribute to his late friend and mentor. It’s kind of touching, really.

      2. Haven’the seen the movie AI, but so far, the best telling of an AI coming into its own has been Westworld. Although an AI modeled on the human mind is ultimately less interesting than an entirely alien AI, such as subset of the internet, becoming self-aware.

        1. *Reason servers begin to hum*

        2. +1 Eschaton

          1. -90% of mankind

          2. Thou shalt not violate causality within my historic light cone. Or else.

              1. -1 Moscow colony

            1. Stross may be a big ol’ squishy socialist in real life, but his vision of an anarchocapitalist Earth is pretty rad.

              1. His politics suck but he’s a good writer – as long as he can keep his politics out of it (unlike, say, The Apocalypse Codex – hurr durr, evangelicals are teh worst)

                1. Oh, and jesus christ, The Annihilation Score sucked. I take back “good writer” – he’s an uneven writer, who can produce some really good work.

                  1. I dunno, i’ve enjoyed all of the Laundry Files stories, and i wish he would write more in the Eschaton universe.

                    Stross has openly expressed disdain for libertarianism on his blog while thoroughly misunderstanding what “libertarianism” actually means, but along with his fellow socialist Ken MacLeod, he’s pretty good at creating visions of a libertarian future (even if neither of them really understand how it came to be).

                    1. i’ve enjoyed all of the Laundry Files stories

                      Really? You enjoyed a description of Mo having lots of meetings with a side of hysterical girliness, contrary to all past depictions of her? I hated Annihilation Score. Last one was good, though.

                      On a semi-related note, if you like The Laundry, check out The Chequey books – The Rook & Stiletto. I enjoyed the hell out of those.

              2. IIRC he said somewhere Accelerando was intended as an anti-utopian piece. Or something along those lines.

        3. I thought Her was really good, and probably had the most realistic ending in terms of how AI would view humanity.

          1. I’d say Ex Machina came a lot closer to capturing how AI would view humanity — basically, wet flesh machines to be manipulated to do what the AI wants, and then left to die if they posed the slightest threat.

        4. I’m not as into Hard Sci-fi as some of you, but I liked the idea in Ex Machina of building an AI through search engine data.

    3. While you may be right about what Spielberg was thinking, that movie is mostly a mess because he took up the reins after Kubrick died. And on top of that, it was taken from a Philip K Dick short story that (as usual for a Kubrick film) had no resemblance at all to the movie, while trying to maintain some of the same themes. If I recall correctly, the story was about a manufactured boy who is programmed to love, listening almost oblivious to his mom talking about replacing him with a real boy, and not caring because of his manufactured love of her. It was pretty sad.

      1. That actually sounds interesting. Reminds me of Stephen Chang’s Hell Is The Absence of God.

      2. Overt’s right. And while A.I. borrows lots of elements from Pinocchio, the real message I got was that you can program a machine to love but you can’t program humans to love it back. The humans in A.I. really sucked.

        1. Kid grew up to be an UGGO, as well…..

          I mean a REAL uggo….

          1. He seems to have a good sense of humor about it.

      3. And on top of that, it was taken from a Philip K Dick short story that (as usual for a Kubrick film adaptations of Dick’s work) had no resemblance at all to the movie, while trying to maintain some of the same themes.

        Related:

        Convincing your girlfriend she’s crazy or paranoid is called gaslighting and it’s a dick move.

        But convincing her she’s a robot with artificially-implanted human emotions is called bladerunning. It’s a Philip K Dick move.

        1. It’s a Philip K Dick move.

          clap clap clap.

          1. clap clap clap

            Fortunately, most anteeBEEotiks (This is how Dr. ZG pronounces this – it’s so adorable!) will still successfully treat that.

    4. It does fit in nicely with how progressives view personal development.

  3. Inauguration weekend is going to be weird.

    If Scott Baio has anything to do with it.

    1. Ev’rywhere I hear the sound
      Of marching charging feet, boy
      ‘Cause Inauguration Day’s here and the time is right
      For fighting in the street, boy

    2. The first six hours is just a repeated screening of Zapped!

      1. +1 Heather Thomas poster

      2. According to detailed research I’ve carried out, Heather Thomas had a stand-in for the breasts shot.

        1. Why would you tell me that? Not cool, man, not cool.

          1. Even worse, the stand-in was Cal Thomas.

              1. +! Bob had bitch tits.

    3. Trump’s there just to take good care of me, like he’s one of the family.

    4. Let’s all agree on which Baio vehicle we’re choosing to focus on.

      1. Bob Loblaw?

  4. On the rise and fall of potato skins.

    Potato shirts finally the victor

    1. sensible_chuckle.gif

    2. What a fucking week where that makes me laugh as hard as it did.

  5. What’s taking Facebook so long to take down a Live video of a 12-year-old committing suicide?

    It needs to be fake.

    1. where is the video!!! I want to watch it but can;t find it. They all have been removed. Anyone save it or find a source?

      She hung herself outside on a tree so i know that much. :/

  6. “Effective immediately, Cuban nationals who attempt to enter the United States illegally and do not qualify for humanitarian relief will be subject to removal, consistent with U.S. law and enforcement priorities,”

    I have no idea if it’s related, but this is possibly one downside of improved relations with Cuba.

    1. Enh, I have no problem with ending the favoritism. Besides, don’t we have enough of them already? 🙂

      1. As long as they keep opening Cuban restaurants, i say keep ’em coming.

        1. Well of course, if you run out of cubans, the restuarants will have to fold.

          1. Sad! Not that you care about delicious food, of course.

      2. Besides, don’t we have enough of them already?

        I say, as long as there’s even one person trying to flee a communist dictatorship, we don’t have enough of them yet. Let them all escape to here.

    2. Obama is for returning Castro’s slaves to the plantation.

      1. I feel like we’ve been through this before.

        1. It has been a consistant Democrat policy position for over 150 years.

  7. Obama Dog Sunny Bites White House Guest

    President Obama had to deal with a small domestic crisis at the White House — a family friend was bitten by Sunny, the First Family’s 4-year-old dog.

    We’re told the incident occurred Monday when the 18-year-old was visiting the White House. Sources connected to the girl tell us she went to pet and kiss Sunny, and the dog bit her on the face.

    Sunny — a female Portuguese Water Dog — left a nasty gash under the girl’s eye. We’re told the Obamas’ family physician, Dr. Ronny Jackson, checked her out and decided she needed stitches.

    She’s gonna be okay, but we’re told she’ll likely have a small scar … which upset her. She posted various pics of the injury and her visit to Dr. Jackson on social media.

    1. So “Sunny” is Biden’s nickname?

    2. Sources connected to the girl tell us she went to pet and kiss Sunny, and the dog bit her on the face.

      Always a bad idea unless you really know the dog.

      1. But a good metaphor for Obama voters.

      2. At most you should stand still and let them sniff your fingers or your feet so they get to know you.

        1. All I’m saying is that if she sniffed it’s butt, she wouldn’t have gotten bit in the face.

      3. Recently went to hang out with a coworker who has a dog. The dog came an put her face in mine, sniffing. And then she bit my fucking nose. I know how to act around dogs. I don’t even hug them or put my arm over their back because they might take it the wrong way. This dog just wanted to bite me.

        1. You probably shouldn’t have rubbed your face all over that dead squirrel in the yard before coming into the house.

          1. lmfao….

        2. They say dogs are excellent judges of character…

          1. My dog is mostly just an excellent judge of who is likeliest to be holding food at the present moment.

    3. What we need is common-sense dog control legislation.

      1. Including a seven-year waiting period.

        1. That’s like half a dog century!

  8. Trump has spent the morning, per usual, tweeting inflammatory condemnations of various political groups and intelligence agencies.

    Not fake news, per se, but…

    1. GEORGE WASHINGTON: “Benedict Arnold was an overrated general, now he’s joining loser king George, hope he likes the rain over in England #getlost”

    2. @FDR Who cares what some dumb economist says?!? Let’s make America great again with BIG LEAGUE spending #MAGA #NewDeal

  9. The story goes that the dish was invented in the middle of the 20th century after a restaurateur learned that…

    …he could make money on the parts of the potato he was throwing away.

    My wife makes awesomely good potato skins. New Mexico green and cheddar topping. So hot, it’ll burn you twice.

    1. Holy crap, that sounds good. Chili and potatoes are a no-fail combo.

  10. Man In Kilt Falls In Icy Water

    A 50-year-old man was rescued Thursday morning after he fell through the ice into a lake at Oaks Bottom Wildlife Refuge while cross-country skiing. Portland Fire and Rescue tweeted that rescue crews were able to pull him out of the lake and that he is in good condition. Fifty-three year old Ronald Brown of Sellwood tells Oregon Live that he tested the ice and thought it would hold him. Brown, wearing a kilt and skis, called called 911 after finding himself knee-deep in icy water. He was eventually able to walk out of the shallow water and is in good condition. He says looking back, he probably shouldn’t have gone on the ice.

    1. Glad to hear he wasn’t kilt.

      1. Let’s not skirt the real issue here; what was he doing on the ice in the first place?

      2. Probably did wonders for his “bagpipe”.

    2. And we can deduce from this story that he has wicked facial hair, because there would be no other way to tell he was a man after being stuck in that icy water.

      1. Well, that, plus the fact that this is from Portland. It goes without saying that he has a full beard.

        1. So you’re saying that it could have been a woman?

    3. The shrinkage must have been bad with the cold water rushing upkilt.

    4. I’m reminded of the tale of the young American lady on a hiking tour in Scotland, who one day encountered an enormous Scotsman leaning against a stone wall. The Scotsman was big, burly, with a kilt, brogue shoes, a beard like a rhododendron and a tam-o-shanter the size of a Dodge hubcap.

      She regarded him curiously for a few moments. Finally the Scotsman asked, “Kin Ah ‘elp ye, lassie?”

      “I know it’s a cliche,” she said, blushing, “but I have to ask – what do you wear under your kilt?”

      “Ah cannae explain,” the Scotsman replied. “Ye’ll ‘ave to look for yuirsel’.” He lifted the front of his kilt.

      The young American woman bent down and peeked under the proffered kilt. After a moment she recoiled in horror. “Oh my God!” she shrieked. “It’s gruesome!”

      “Oh, aye,” the Scotsman replied. “An’ if ye look agin, ye’ll see it’s gruesome more!”

  11. Popbitch answers the crucial question: if Donald Trump did splash out on a full-luxury piss party in a Moscow hotel room, exactly how steep a bill would he have been looking at here?

    1. The bill would be yuuuuuuge.

    2. if Donald Trump did splash out on a full-luxury piss party in a Moscow hotel …

      And, honestly, who hasn’t?

  12. he’s also been busy expanding NSA power, again.

    Guess he wants a *legacy*-legacy.

    1. I do so enjoy your esoterica, ifh.

    2. Best link of the day

    3. Bi, bi, ??.

      I think I covered the major languages of the area.

    4. Trying to think of a tasteful “floppy disk” joke…

      1. Or a “hard drive” joke.

    5. The 2nd chick totally reminds me of Katinka from Zoolander.

    6. Would totally visit Zagreb on those maps of Croatia, if you know what I mean.

  13. Trump has spent the morning, per usual, tweeting inflammatory condemnations of various political groups and intelligence agencies.

    I think this is going to be the thing that gets people to not vote for him in November.

    1. The people who vote for him aren’t on twitter. All it will do is keep his opponents constantly losing their shit over things that normal people don’t know or care about.

  14. Alright you roving band of degenerates, my veritable Khanate of the Golden Horde, which scotch do I pick up for the impending doom of the midwest known as icepocalypse, like, maybe, we’ll call up the national guard either way. Capping at $150. Go

    1. Oban, and you’ll have money left over.

      1. Big fan already, that was on my shortlist with the classic Mac-12 and Balvenie Doublewood

      1. Laphroaig Quarter Cask. Can’t get much better…OR PEATIER!!!!

      2. If Islays are your thing, I think Bowmore released a 17- or 18- year old bottle a couple years back. If it’s still available, it should just fit inside your budget. Caol Ila is another possibility, but it’s become very ‘in’ over the last few years, so it’s probably ridiculously priced.

    2. Glenmorangie – The Quinta Ruban.

      1. Switzy, you have earned your place among the Reasontariat legends for that.

      2. I’d go with the 18 year Glenmorangie. Though that might be over $150 at this point.

        1. I prefer the Quinta, myself.

      3. A key issue is your palate. If you can’t readily distinguish between a good 12 year and a good 18-20 year malt, screw it and get the 12, and buy 3 times as much.

        This is especially true if you’re the kind of peasant who will throw ice in the glass with the whiskey.

        1. A key issue is your palate. If you can’t readily distinguish between a good 12 year and a good 18-20 year malt, screw it and get the 12, and buy 3 times as much.

          Truth.

          This is especially true if you’re the kind of peasant who will throw ice in the glass with the whiskey.

          HOW DARE YOU! But also, truth.

        2. The key issue is your palate – if you think ther’es such a thing as a good scotch, you’re lost and better off not having that money anyway.

        3. n fact, you could treble down on Switizy’s suggestion, and have a tasting session with a bottle of Quinta Ruban, one of Necta D’Or and one of Lasanta.

          1. Any one of those is a very good choice for someone who doesn’t do the Islay-type scotches. Those three are Pater Dean’s favorites.

    3. Gatorade spiked with bootleg whiskey.

      I don’t know, what am I, Emily Post?

      1. Of all your delusional beliefs, this is the saddest.

        1. You think that my over-the top, ridiculous joke was delusional?

    4. You may be able to get a bottle of Balvenie Doublewood at that price.

      1. It’s normally $50?

      2. The 12 year, absolutely. The 17 year, iffy if you include shipping.

        A good place to pricecheck is 1000 corks. Which scottish cru are you leaning towards?

    5. What do you like? If you like peat, I’d vote for Lagavulin. If you like not-peat, maybe Dalwhinnie.

        1. Dalwhinnie is the best thing to give to people who think they don’t like Scotch.

          1. I’ll usually pull out a bottle of Jura or Oban when I’m attempting a conversion. That’s when I usually find out that their previous experience with scotch had been Johnny Walker or something like that.

    6. If you can find a brand that doesn’t taste like popsicle sticks, buy that.

    7. Go Bourbon instead.

      Its Trump’s world, none of that imported crap.

      1. Plus, you know, bourbon is better anyway.

      2. Blame the bourbon distillers for the explosion in single-malt ‘flavored’ whiskeys. And we know WHY we need to blame the bourbon distillers, don’t we?

        Hipster bourbon consumption.

        Pieprzone biodr?wki, ?e zniszczy wszystko.

    8. I like Caol Ila – Islay, but not super-peaty.

      For that budget, if you like peat, I’d go for the older Laphroaig – I think its 18 years. The Quarter Cask is really good, too.

    9. Bourbon.

      1. Because scotch tastes like bourbon that’s been filtered thru an ashtray.

        1. Scotch is very diverse. If you think you don’t like it, you probably just haven’t found the right one.

          There is no style of whisky (or whiskey) I don’t like. Though I tend to favor malt and prefer American rye to Bourbon for the most part.

          1. Trump is proof that Cthulhu hates us and wants us to be suicidal.

            1. … and teh sqrrlz put mah reply in teh wrong place!

          2. … prefer American rye…

            Preach, brother!

            1. Same here. I just keep going back to rye for cocktails.

              1. There’s probably some fancy-schmancy name for it, but I prefer an Old Fashioned made with rye rather than bourbon.

                1. Old Fashioned was originally made with rye. Manhattan too.

                  1. So, “Older Fashioned” then.

                  2. Correct – I start yelling if I order a Manhattan and they reach for bourbon.

  15. Trump has spent the morning, per usual, tweeting inflammatory condemnations of various political groups and intelligence agencies.

    Everyone says they want an outsider until they realize what that means.

    1. If only other Presidents would make it so easy to ignore them.

  16. Charlotte County maid of honor turns wedding into nightmare

    “She just went up to the best man and grabbed his keys out of his pocket and jumped in his car,” said Templeton.

    Willis backed out and almost hit the best man – David’s brother Brian. He grabbed on to the car and held on.

    “She took off, and his feet were dragging across the ground. He had to hit the E-brake,” said Templeton.

    Guests wrestled Willis out of the car.

    “She went back inside. She grabbed up the big bottle of Captain Morgan and just guzzled it like this,” said Jennifer Butler.

    Then they say she got violent.

    “As soon as I turned around, she came up and cracked me upside of the face,” said Templeton.

    He said he swung back before he knew what was happening, and the deputies were called.

    “It was insane. Absolutely insane,” said Jena Templeton.

    Deputies said Willis claimed to be having an asthma attack and started shaking as if she were having a seizure. They took her to Bayfront Punta Gorda, where she exposed herself to deputies, assaulted two medics and kicked over her bed pan, according to the sheriff’s office.

    1. Nice booking photo.

      Crusty, what’s the verdict?

        1. Given the story, that could be blood spatter.

          So… definitely would.

          But would use someone else’s name.

      1. She looks exactly the way I would have expected.

        1. Thought maybe she’d be wearing a hijab and we’d have a maid of honor killing on hands.

        2. Difficult to tell from the booking photo, but we’re all wondering: meth mouth?

    2. I would give almost anything to attend a wedding like this.

      1. I once attended a wedding where the bride did keg stands in her wedding dress. I have also attended a classy wedding that received a write-up for being so classy on some bridal website.

        Guess which one was more fun.

        GUESS!

    3. Redhead, of course.

    4. Ah, I see what we have her is the Florida Woman.

    5. That rivals the Serbian wedding I attended.

    6. /googles “Charlotte County”

      What?! That doesn’t sound like the Floridia I kno… oh, wait, that sounds _exactly_ like the Florida I know.

      Don’t ever change, Florida Woman.

    7. This arrest is Willis’ ninth in Charlotte County.

      1. One more arrest and she gets a free sub.

        1. To go with her obvious dom personality.

          1. Nice.

    8. Willis backed out and almost hit the best man – David’s brother Brian. He grabbed on to the car and held on…

      Guests wrestled Willis out of the car.

      “She went back inside. She grabbed up the big bottle of Captain Morgan and just guzzled it like this,” said Jennifer Butler.

      Then they say she got violent.

      “Then”?

      1. Rum gets me wound up, too.

    9. While Willis was supposed to be the bride’s best friend, Jennifer Butler said the two are no longer friends.

      She singlehandedly transforms your wedding from some lame princess fantasy into a proper Florida fight party, and you hold it against her?

      1. Seems childish, right?

  17. he’s also been busy expanding NSA power, again.

    Oh man, just wait until he finds out who’s going to be President after him.

    1. Progs just don’t get it. They fawn over Obama like he’s a rock star.

      They never will. Even after Trump getting elected, they’ll just want the right “top man”.

      Fools.

  18. “The Airline Toilets Theatre Company: Great Works of Drama, Literature and Dance, performed in the toilets/restrooms of commercial airliners, by musician Peter Brooke Turner, as he travels the globe playing his ukulele and singing. Enjoy!”

    1. Thanks, ifh! Now I have an excuse to post this again.

  19. Ivar Giaever lays down the law on climate change bull shit:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6LxkvhSfDno&t=836s

  20. On the rise and fall of potato skins.

    The Washington NFL franchise’s new name.

    1. Hail to the Spudskins!

    2. Vox: Why The New NFL Team Name “Washington Potato Skins” Is More Problematic Than You Realize

      1. Potato skins are brown or red, right?

        Still RACISSS!

  21. Vampire bats in Brazil are feeding on humans: Study

    Researchers from the Federal University of Pernambuco have found that the vampire bats, previously thought to feed only on the blood of birds, have expanded their menu to include humans for the first time, according to the Daily Mail.

    Feces samples from 70 of the blood-suckers living in the Catimbau National Park in Brazil were tested and three showed traces of human blood, stunning researchers.

    “We were quite surprised,” Enrico Bernard, the lead author of the study, told the New Scientist, adding that some bats also fed on chickens. “This species isn’t adapted to feed on the blood of mammals. They are adapting to their environment and exploiting the new resources.”

    1. “This species isn’t adapted to feed on the blood of mammals. They are adapting to their environment and exploiting the new resources.”

      Further proof to show how devastating climate change really is.

    2. And now Brazilians are gonna go batshit crazy to kill these cute little creatures.

    3. I thought every nature special showed them sucking blood from cattle.

      Are there multiple species? yikes.

      1. The Brazilian subspecies has evolved to suck blood from booty.

  22. Scientists Create Mind-Controlled Hunting Zombie Mice

    Flash one light, and the mouse goes on the prowl, zombielike, stalking any prey in its path. Flash another, and it delivers a killing blow with its teeth. The mouse doesn’t hunt out of hunger?scientists are in control.

    Those scientists were studying how the vertebrate brain controls hunting behavior, something that is not well-understood. They hypothesized that one part, the central nucleus of the amygdala, plays a key role. While omnivorous mice normally opt for plants over meat, the researchers found that they could turn their furry subjects into hunters, break their hunting behavior into a pair of simpler ones after a slew of experiments?and control those behaviors individually.

    1. Since it didn’t induce them to attack other mice, that headline seems a bit overblown. They just made really hangry mice.

  23. Niagara Falls resident called police to ‘stop the wind from blowing’

    A Niagara Falls police dispatcher informed officers that a resident had called to request police stop the wind from blowing, according to an audio recording obtained by The Action.

    “All cars be advised, someone called to see if the police could stop the wind from blowing so they could sleep,” the dispatcher said.

    The dispatcher then requested any officers with command over the elements of nature contact dispatch to handle the situation.

    “If any of you guys could do that, could you let me know?” she asked.

    1. Elton John once called reception at a hotel and made that very same request. Of course, he had the excuse of being an obscenely rich rock star with a massive drug habit and an eating disorder

      1. And then wrote ‘Candle in the Wind’ which was originally titled ‘This fucken wind is keeping me up all night thinking about Marilyn Monroe for some fucken moment while Bernie sleeps snug in the other room.’

        1. Which, of course, is the song Elton John hastily rewrites the lyrics for anytime one of his famous friends dies.

          1. Drunk Elton John:

            Scratches off Marilyn Monroe adds….HITLER!

            1. Am I a bad person for LOLing?

              1. Maybe this is a good time to ask ENB on a scale of 1 – 5 (with 5 being the highest) what is the maturity level here at Reason comments central?

                1. It’s somehow higher than the majority of the internet.

                  1. It’s somehow higher than the majority of the internet.

                    It’s incredible how true this is.

                    1. Fuckin’ aye, motherfucker.

        2. “Never knowin who to turn to when the wind set in”

          So I guess you cross the cops off that list.

    2. Canadian or American side?

    3. Caller: “Can you stop the wind?”

      Cops: “Ma’am, we’re not the ones breaking it. Check with your husband.”

    4. Slowly I turn, inch by inch…

    5. Officer Canute had the night off, I take it.

  24. U.S. troops’ move to Poland unnerves Kremlin

    “The main goal of our mission is deterrence and prevention of threats,” U.S. Army Colonel Christopher R. Norrie, commander of the 3rd Armoured Brigade Combat Team, said at a welcome ceremony in Poland’s western city of Zagan.

    Poland and the Baltic former Soviet Republics requested U.S. and NATO troops after Russia’s annexation of Ukraine’s Crimea Peninsula in 2014, fearing further military operations in the region by President Vladimir Putin.

    The Kremlin, which has previously criticised NATO for its reinforcement in Eastern Europe, said on Thursday the deployment was an aggressive step along its borders.

    “We consider this a threat to us,” Dmitry Peskov, Kremlin’s spokesman, told journalists on a conference call. “We are talking here about a third country stepping up its military presence in Europe near our borders.”

    1. Perhaps we should sign some sort of pact with Russia to put them at ease about our intentions in Poland and Eastern Europe.

    2. TRUMP!

      Seriously, what the fuck is that cocksucker Obama trying to do exactly?

    3. Note that Zagan is like 10 miles from the German border. This is little more than symbolism.

      1. Really? I would have guessed that Brigade was our invasion force.

      2. Really? I would have guessed that Brigade was our invasion force.

        1. SQUIRRELLZ are the invasion force!!!!

    4. And there is no reason at all for Poland or the Baltic states to consider Russia a threat. Nope.

    5. Not counting the small slice that used to be Koenigsburg, the Ukraine and the Baltics are still between Russia and Poland. The Rusdians can pound sand.

      1. More accurately, the Baltics and part of the Ukraine are between Russia and Poland.

  25. Florida woman, 70, arrested for prostitution in undercover sting

    A senior citizen was arrested at a Florida massage parlor after an undercover sting, the Jacksonville Sheriff’s Office said in a report.

    Sun Hee Gribat, 70, was arrested Tuesday at Jax Therapy after she offered a sex act after a massage, JSO said.

    The hour-long massage cost $70, JSO said, and an additional service in the form of a sex act was offered for another $60, the police report said.

    Gribat, listed as a non-resident with a Missouri driver’s license, was charged with prostitution and practicing massage therapy without a license.

    1. Gribat, listed as a non-resident with a Missouri driver’s license, was charged with prostitution and practicing massage therapy without a license.

      Well, I feel safer.

      1. I wonder which one has the heavier penalty.

    2. *holds down vomit*

    3. Sun Hee, you smiled at me and really took away the pain.

    4. Crusty it hardest.

      1. I would if I knew what the verb “to crusty” meant

        1. Autocorrect has ruined more obvious jokes than any other so-called technological breakthrough.

          1. Every autocorrect fuck up is still funny if you think hard enough.

          2. Autocorrect has made more funnehs than it has kilt.

            1. +1 Local Colour

        2. You really don’t want to know.

        3. to spooge

          1. I’d tell you to turn that frown upside down, but…

      2. Somehow this makes even more sense with the typo.

      3. Philosophy question for the day: if you could push a button to give yourself an add-on fetish for senior citizens, would you?

        1. Can i wait and push it when i get old?

        2. And once again make biggest mistake of my life?

        3. *Buries face in Early Bird Special*

          Sure.

        4. +1 lemon party

    5. $60 for a happy ending? She should have been arrested for price gouging.

      1. The happy ending is included. She was charging $60 to stop.

        1. The $60 is for her to take her teeth out.

    6. Following the Houston Chronicle’s documentation of the Harris County Sheriff’s war on rub-n-tugs, this is the rule, not the exception in the industry.

  26. 12-year-old boy demands chicken nugget at gunpoint, classmate refuses

    It was his second attempt to get a chicken nugget from the girl, police said. The boy noticed the girl buy chicken McNuggets at a Lexington Avenue and East 103rd Street McDonald’s on Tuesday. He asked her for a McNugget and she refused.

    The boy allegedly followed the girl into the 103rd St. No. 6-train station, pointed a gun at her head and demanded a McNugget again, police said. The girl smacked the gun away from her head and told the boy to leave her alone.

    She boarded the train unharmed, police said. The girl later saw the boy showing the gun to another child on the train.

  27. Marijuana DOES cause schizophrenia and triggers heart attacks, experts say in landmark study that slams most of the drug’s medical benefits as ‘unproven’

    Marijuana does raise the risk of getting schizophrenia and triggers heart attacks, according to the most significant study on the drug’s effects to date.

    A federal advisory panel admitted cannabis can almost certainly ease chronic pain, and might help some people sleep.

    But it dismisses most of the drug’s other supposedly ‘medical benefits’ as unproven.

    Crucially, the researchers concluded there is not enough research to say whether marijuana effectively treats epilepsy – one of the most widely-recognized reasons for cannabis prescriptions.

    The report also casts doubt on using cannabis to treat cancers, irritable bowel syndrome, or certain symptoms of Parkinson’s disease, or helping people beat addictions.

    1. The science is settled, devil weed deniers.

    2. Marijuana does raise the risk of getting schizophrenia and triggers heart attacks

      But, to be fair, so does watching the evening news.

      1. Doc, I’m worried about my husband. He keeps muttering to himself about the Russians. Sometime I catching him saying shut up to Putin, when he’s alone.

    3. Hmm. Maybe the lack of evidence has something do do with the feds making it very difficult to do extensive research on cannabis derived medicine.

      We have to keep it on schedule 1 because it has no proven medical benefits. We can’t prove any medical benefits because it is schedule 1.

      1. If it helps keep one cancer patient from eating after a long chemo session, then it is worth it.

    4. Going out on a limb and guessing that this will end up being one of those study results that can never be replicated.

      1. … one of those study results that can never be replicated.

        Isn’t that “most of them”?

  28. You wanna know why people hate libertarians?

    On the campaign trail, Donald Trump, a real estate developer, entertained libertarians with his theory that spacing out vaccines makes more sense to him than what the carefully studied schedule that the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and every other legitimate medical authority in our country recommends.

    1. carefully studied schedule

      My ass. They carefully study the spacing between the initial shot and the booster. Not the spacing between the multitude of vaccines they administer now.

    2. entertained libertarians

      OK, so did he seek out a group of libertarians just to tell them this or was this some random group of libertarians who commented on this? Big-L or small-l? Cosmo or Yokel?

      1. I don’t believe a word of this. Libertarians set a higher bar for entertainment

        1. That would exclude the vast majority of the cmmentariat, despite their self-identification.

        2. ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?

          1. Let me think about it.

            … No.

            1. BIG SURPRISE.

  29. Take some nice long Idaho Potatoes. Rub with oil and salt and bake directly on oven grate at 400 until done. May want to put rack on grate below to catch any oil. When cool. Cut in half lenthwise. Take a spoon and scoop out, leaving enought meat for a hearty skin. Try and keep the scooped out portions chunky so you can use for morning hash browns. Freeze potato skins, try yo keep seperated. I usually just lay them out in a single layer in a gallon zip lock and lay in freezer shelf to do this.

    1. Where is the THC-infused butter? /moral outrage

    2. When your ready to eat, deep fry the frozen skins at 350 to 375 until dark golden brown. Fill will cheese and crumbled crispy bacon and broil until cheese melted. Broiler will burn stuff like right now so keep an eye on. When done, top with sour cream, salt n pepper, jalapenos, and chopped green onion ( tge green part). Add whatever else your tiny libertarian heart desires. Boom.

    3. Fyi.. Potatoes will take about an hour at 400 to bake

      1. I don’t do much in a microwave, but I think potatoes cook up just fine, and a lot faster, in a microwave.

        YM*MV.

        *microwave

        1. Yeah, but the skins turn out better in the oven. No difference on the inside I agree.

    4. “Take some nice long Idaho Potatoes. Rub with oil and salt and…”

      I’m not supposed to fuck it, right?

      1. No, no, you’re not making poutine

        1. So he’s supposed to fuck it up?

          1. Oh no you dint!

      2. So that’s what Italians do with olive oil? That’s amore.

    5. Take some nice long Idaho Potatoes. Rub with oil

      Heckuva euphemism, there!

  30. Peter Thiel, Trump’s Tech Pal, Explains Himself

    “There’s some resonances between Hogan beating Gawker and Trump beating the establishment in this country,” Mr. Thiel says. Hulk Hogan was “this crazy person” who didn’t seem like the best plaintiff, but “he didn’t give up.”

    Using two wrestling terms he learned, Mr. Thiel says that many people assumed Mr. Trump was “kayfabe” ? a move that looks real but is fake. But then his campaign turned into a “shoot” ? the word for an unscripted move that suddenly becomes real.

    “People thought the whole Trump thing was fake, that it wasn’t going to go anywhere, that it was the most ridiculous thing imaginable, and then somehow he won, like Hogan did,” Mr. Thiel says. “And what I wonder is, whether maybe pro wrestling is one of the most real things we have in our society and what’s really disturbing is that the other stuff is much more fake. And whatever the superficialities of Mr. Trump might be, he was more authentic than the other politicians. He sort of talked in a way like ordinary people talk. It was not sort of this Orwellian newspeak jargon that so many of the candidates use. So he was sort of real. He actually wanted to win.”

    1. And in both cases, the crazy person wins because the opponent shot themselves in the face, repeatedly.

  31. “Effective immediately, Cuban nationals who attempt to enter the United States illegally and do not qualify for humanitarian relief will be subject to removal, consistent with U.S. law and enforcement priorities,” Obama said in a Thursday statement.

    That will teach those uppity fucking Cubans to vote for Trump.

    1. How anybody can see this as anything but a big fuck you to Cubans for voting Trump I have no idea.

    2. I couldn’t help,knowing how this guy operates, feel this is why he did it. Retribution.

    3. There are good Latinos and there are bad Latinos.

    4. Because Cubans no longer suffer under a despotic regime.

      1. Because they don’t recognize the awesomeness of their present regime – and who wants more Trump types flooding in?

    5. “Effective immediately, Cuban nationals who attempt to enter the United States illegally and do not qualify for humanitarian relief will be subject to removal, consistent with U.S. law and enforcement priorities,” Obama said in a Thursday statement.

      Not to be confused will Latin American nationals, etc.

      After the legislation failed, Obama shifted his strategy, pursuing executive actions that allowed some groups of undocumented immigrants to remain in the country.

      The White House also exercised executive authority by changing its enforcement priorities to violent offenders, which resulted in a drop in the number of people being arrested within the interior country and deported.

      “[The Department of Homeland Security] has placed more of a priority on border removals and has tried to scale back on the interior,” said Faye Hipsman, a policy analyst at the Migration Policy Institute.

      http://thehill.com/latino/2938…..0-year-low

      Of course, if we catch the Cuban refugees attempting to cross the border, that’s not really a deportation, so he has that going for him.

  32. Obama says sometimes in his presidency he failed to marshal enough public opinion

    Well, he’s never been able to convince *me* that “poor explanation” is the reason for his failures.

    1. He didn’t browbeat us enough.

    2. He waltzed into office thinking he could redo his Adjunct gig at the University of Chicago and lecture the people.

    3. If only he’d given us just one or two more sanctimonious lectures about what bad people we are, I might have gotten on board with his entire agenda. It’s not like anyone has ever had any real substantive disagreements about his policies that some finger wagging couldn’t turn around.

    4. And Clinton’s campaign failed because not enough Lena Dunham.

      1. I was going to vote for Clinton, but then I realized that I hadn’t been lectured at by Lena Dunham about how terrible I am and I lost interest in her campaign and voted for Literally Hitler.

  33. The towering socialist icon feeds his massive offspring through icy undercover aggressions tossed at the feet of Exit-
    but what remains is far more foreboding: “The six ways to Sunday the spooks can get back at you,” said Mr. Chuck Schumer with green lasers shooting from his pupils.

    The thing crawls with sin, brothers and sisters, and not the delightful forms of sin.

    1. Superb.

    2. Those aren’t his pupils.

  34. Confirm or Deny: Peter Thiel

    You like “Star Trek” more than “Star Wars.”

    Deny. I like “Star Wars” way better. I’m a capitalist. “Star Wars” is the capitalist show. “Star Trek” is the communist one. There is no money in “Star Trek” because you just have the transporter machine that can make anything you need. The whole plot of “Star Wars” starts with Han Solo having this debt that he owes and so the plot in “Star Wars” is driven by money.

    1. What an evil man, that capitalist.

      1. HOW CAN SPACE CAPITALISM SURVIVE THE POST-SCARCITY SPACE ECONOMY?

    2. Obi Wan: I want to say one word to you. Just one word.
      Luke: Yes, sir.
      Obi Wan: Are you listening?
      Luke: Yes, I am.
      Obi Wan: Midichlorians.
      Luke: Exactly how do you mean?
      Obi Wan: There’s a great future in midichlorians. Think about it. Will you think about it?

    3. TNG is commie, TOS is pretty libertarian. And no one in Star Wars every questions why there needs to be a giant space republic so bloated and corrupt it’s just an evil empire waiting to be born.

      1. You speak like one of those crony-capitalist Chinamen from the Trade Federation.

        1. You mean like Nute (Newt) Gunray (Ray-gun)?

      2. It was a federation. You know, an alliance of independent states. History teaches us that the governments of those federations keep clawing more and more power and money for themselves to the detriment of the rights of citizens and the various independent states.

      3. Next you’ll tell me that somehow “de-regulating the banks” is not the immediate and obvious precursor to a totalitarian takeover of said bloated republic.

      4. OF course, the fact that the space republic descends into totalitarianism is itself a libertarian theme.

      5. TOS was liberal-democrat in the older tradition, the one where liberal democrats could still be pro-American.

    4. Awesome.

    5. There is no money in “Star Trek” because you just have the transporter machine that can make anything you need.

      Beam me up a million bucks, Scotty.

      1. How can you say that the replicator is not an outgrowth of transporter tech? Clearly it is just materilization using base stock not of the same form as the original. The special effect was even the same.

      2. That million bucks just disappeared out of James Goodfellows’ bank account, you savage.

    6. Han was smuggling “spice”, which would seems to be an illicit, or heavily controlled, drug (a homage to “Dune”, I think).

      Though original series Trek seems to be more American frontier, with merchants and mining interests and money (Federation Credits).

  35. On the rise and fall of potato skins.

    The dish was a running gag on ABC’s The Middle for a while, so I guess pop culture says they’re on the outs.

  36. Every time there’s a link about food this fucking place turn into Women’s Weekly.

    1. Better than Women’s Monthly.

      1. + blood coming out of wherever.

        1. It’s called a hoo haw, and we all have them.

      2. [golf clap]

    2. Hate crime.

  37. There’s a high cost to human-trafficking “awareness” campaigns.

    There’s a whole industry of awareness campaigns on every front. Everybody wants to grab onto that free money teat.

    1. The More You Know … The More Money We Make

      1. I can only know so much. How much money you need?

      2. The More We Talk … The More Money We Make

    2. Grab its motherfucking free money teat?

  38. CSPAN Feed Mysteriously Begins Broadcasting Russia Today

    In a strange moment of startling symmetry with the current state of American politics, C-SPAN?the public affairs network that regularly broadcasts proceedings the United States House of Representatives and Senate?was interrupted by a broadcast of Russia Today.

    The state-funded Russian news network briefly took over the online feed of C-SPAN1, which had been broadcasting a discussion in Congress regarding the Securities and Exchange Commission Regulatory Accountability Act.

    As California Democrat Maxine Waters was speaking, the feed suddenly cut from the House floor to a broadcast of RT. The feed cut in with a commercial break before returning to the RT news desk, where an anchor spoke of a suicide bombing.

    1. OMG Russians! Taking over our democracy! OMG OMG OMG!

    2. They hacked us again. The bastards!

    3. As California Democrat Maxine Waters was speaking, the feed suddenly cut from the House floor to a broadcast of RT.

      Well, no wonder.

      1. Yeah, they couldn’t tell the difference.

        From Wikipedia: Waters has visited Cuba a number of times, praised Fidel Castro, and demanded an end to the U.S. trade embargo. In 1998 Waters wrote a letter to Castro citing the 1960s and 1970s as “a sad and shameful chapter of our history,” and thanked Castro for providing help to those who needed to “flee political persecution.”

        1. It’s amazing she keeps getting elected.

          1. Not when you consider that it’s Democrats that keep electing her. I’ve not known many Dem controlled electorates to be repulsed by leftist dictatorships.

      2. *signs thank-you card to RT*

        1. No kidding. Eye sores replaced with eye candy.

    4. WOLVERINES!

      /Canadian detachment joins in…

      BEAVERS!

    5. What are the odds this sh1t was staged?

  39. Who are these political groups that he is inflaming? I read his tweets and didn’t see any of that.

    All he said was phony allegations were put together by opponents who are sleazebag operatives for both republicans and democrats and released by “intelligence”. And hillary clinton’s people complaining about FBI

    I dont see where trump is wrong here.

    1. You really don’t know how to social justice warrior, eh?

      1. You SJW, bro?

        1. I can’t even right now

  40. Wait a second. Why is “Wet Foot” policy ok but “Wet Back” is racist?

    1. Because one is based on the stereotypical fondness of Mexicans for the backstroke.

  41. US man pays tax bill using five wheelbarrows of coins

    Nick Stafford from Cedar Buff, Virginia, delivered so many coins that the DMV’s automated counting machines could not cope with the volume.

    His delivery stunt follows a legal row he had with the DMV over contacting its staff to make tax inquiries.

    It took staff at least seven hours to count the coins, working until late.

    They finally finished the task early on Thursday morning.

    Mr Stafford told the BBC that he made his protest because he wanted government departments to be more responsive to public inquiries.

    “It shouldn’t matter if you pay $300 per year in income taxes or pay $300,000 per year in income taxes like myself, because the backbone of a free democracy/republic begins with government transparency, period,” he said.

    Mr Stafford explains on his company’s website that his dispute with the DMV arose because the department would not give him direct phone numbers of who to contact in order to register three vehicles and pay the sales tax – bearing in mind he owns three houses in different locations.

    1. Why are we bearing in mind his multiple residences? Am I stupid? Does that have a real impact on the story?

      1. That’s the media signalling that he’s rich, and therefore greedy.

            1. How else is he going to put up all the refugees he’s taking in?

  42. The Trump Blitzkrieg

    The tone of Donald Trump’s presidency has been set one week before he takes office: raucous, brawling, improvised, unpredictable, frenzied, entertaining, and more than a little weird. It’s hard to keep track of all that is happening in Washington and New York: Russian hacks, salacious gossip, fake news, government ethics, the fate of Obamacare, cabinet and White House appointments, personal feuds, and confirmation hearings for Jeff Sessions, John Kelly, Rex Tillerson, Elaine Chao, Mike Pompeo, Jim Mattis, and Ben Carson. Each day brings crazy revelations, rebuttals by the president elect and his team, congressional maneuvering, proclamations from Trump Tower, and media sniping. And Trump wouldn’t have it any other way.

    “I don’t carry a briefcase,” the president elect wrote 30 years ago in The Art of the Deal. “I try not to schedule too many meetings. I leave my door open. You can’t be imaginative or entrepreneurial if you’ve got too much structure. I prefer to come to work each day and just see what develops.”

    1. I often compare him to the honey badger: He don’t give a s?t what people think.

      Interesting article, but NO. FUCKING. WAY.

    2. So today the headline reads “Trump Blitzkrieg”, next week when Trump insults Congress it will read “Trumps Reichstag Fire”, the week after that it will read “Trumps Krystallnacht” and in a few months when he unveils some dubious “jobs program” they’ll call it “Trump: Arbeit Macht Frei” because you know, Trump is literally Hitler.

    3. He’s adapting the Clinton/Obama “dense pack” strategy for scandal defense – have so many things moving at once that most of them fall of the radar/they are one incomprehensible blob.

      If he starts deregulating in job lots, I think this will be a very effective strategy. “Deregulation” has a positive vibe; regulation only works when you can whip up fear of something specific. The specifics will get lost in the dense pack.

  43. “Effective immediately, Cuban nationals who attempt to enter the United States illegally and do not qualify for humanitarian relief will be subject to removal, consistent with U.S. law and enforcement priorities,” Obama said in a Thursday statement.

    Is this some kind of punishment because most Cuban-Americans voted for Trump? I genuinely wonder, it should by now be an undisputed fact that the Democrats view immigration policy as an electoral tool.

    1. I wouldn’t be at all surprised to learn this was a reprisal against a Republican-leaning community.

      1. He’s probably also got this cynical calculation of Trump not reversing this.

        1. Yeah, he probably thinks he’s caught Trump in a trap: “Let’s see Mr. tough-on-immigration issue an order to protect Cubans from deportation!”

          Of course, one thing Trump could do would be to revoke Obama’s order on the grounds that changes in U.S./Cuba relations ought to be part of a comprehensive Treaty of Peace and Commerce between the two countries, and that unilaterally changing parts of the relationship before such a treaty could be negotiated would be surrendering one’s bargaining position.

          1. Of course, Obama is probably expecting an eruption of outrage in the media each time Trump revokes one of his last-minute executive orders.

            I hope Trump issues one big order reversing all Obama’s lame-duck orders, so that the media only get one news cycle to chew on it.

            And Trump could say something quotable like “if America could afford to wait eight years for these policy changes, it can afford to wait a bit longer while we figure out what’s going on.”

            1. I hope Trump issues one big order reversing all Obama’s lame-duck orders, so that the media only get one news cycle to chew on it.

              And then CNN cuts to images of old people dying in the street, probably in Africa or something but they’ll claim it’s Detroit, all because some worthless Executive Orders were discarded.

              Narrative:
              “I don’t remember what life was like before the Executive Orders of November ’16 to January ’17, but I’m certain it was nasty, brutish and short. “

            2. I hope Trump issues one big order reversing all Obama’s lame-duck orders, so that the media only get one news cycle to chew on it.

              Exactly. Let the predictable frenzy from the DemOp Media turn it into a dense pack that negates itself.

          2. If you’re good at something (e.g. fucking immigrants), never do it for free.

        2. Or if he does, looking hypocritical.

    2. That’s basically it.

      He knows that Cubans are conservative, so that’s why he’s restricting them. (That or it was a part of a secret promise made to the Castros.)

      I fully expect him to argue for Puerto Rican statehood for the same reasons.

    3. I don’t wonder. I genuinely believe it is a reprisal.

      I hope Trump reverses this shit next week.

      1. He won’t. Because Little Marco and Espanol.

    4. It really is hard to believe that Cuban expats in the US may not love the President who’s normalized relations with the Castros.

    5. it should by now be an undisputed fact that the Democrats view immigration all policy as an electoral tool

      FTFY

  44. Cavuto: CNN Now Knows What It Feels Like To Be FOX News; “They Say Payback’s A Bitch”

    NEIL CAVUTO: How’s all that going down, CNN? How does it feel to be dismissed? Or worse, ignored?

    How does it feel when your feelings are hurt? When your reporters are singled out? And you’re treated unfairly? And unkindly? Even rudely? What’s it like not to be liked? It’s not fun, is it?

    They say payback’s a bitch. If only you would take a moment to rewind the tape. And see the show is on the other foot. Or am I confusing it with the one now kicking you in the ass. You see it’s hard to tell from where I sit. Back then your silence was deafening.

    Very different now, isn’t it? And I suspect not much fun, is it?

    1. I’ve always liked Neil. He doesn’t seem like such a partisan hack.

    2. Dammit, now I’m going to have to buy a new cask for the tears of the legacy media. Good time to be in the cask-making or associated supply industries.

    3. Trump is a karma bomb. Or, depending on how you look at the metaphysical, he is God’s judgment on America and its people.

  45. More “Arrested Development” coming, according to producer

    “We are close,” Grazer told Deadline. “I think we found a way to create the compensation structure for all the actors and create a work matrix so they can still make movies and do other things and it will all integrate. So we are really close — I think within a couple of weeks at the most.”

    Grazer would not give any details on the plot of the upcoming season, but last year creator Mitchell Hurwitz suggested a serialized murder mystery in the vein of “Making a Murderer.”

    I am still waiting for Koogler.

    1. I think we found a way to create the compensation structure for all the actors and create a work matrix so they can still make movies and do other things and it will all integrate. So we are really close — I think within a couple of weeks at the most.

      Translation: We decided to cave in to the cast members’ demands for reach arounds.

      1. Translation: actors who are offered lots of money to do other projects need some incentive to ditch them and work on cult farce instead, or be able to fit both jobs in.

        1. That was the problem with Firefly, nobody could lure those actors back from their numerous gigs… wait, what have any of them done since Serenity?

          1. Bits and pieces. Homeland, Castle, that’s about it.

          2. Castle ran for eight seasons, bucko.

          3. Deadpool, Frozen, Wreck-It-Ralph, and Zootopia are the first ones that come to mind. Was Chuck before or after Serenity?

            1. Deadpool Baccarin > Firefly Baccarin. Somehow, despite 15 years passing.

          4. Terminator the Sarah Connor Chronicles. No I don’t have the box set.

          5. Tudyk’s pretty much got it made with Disney now. Adam Baldwin was on Chuck for five years and now on that Battleship show. Gina Torres pops up everywhere.

    2. Was that recent resurrection of AD good? I don’t “stream” so if it’s good I’ll get it in DVD, if it’s out.

      1. I watched several episodes. It has its highlights, but the gimmicky structure robbed it of AD’s greatest assets, tight writing and frequent callbacks/brick jokes. I need to finish it off one of these days.

      2. Not really. It was not only the writing structure that commodious mentions; it’s largely because the actors’ schedules never worked out back then. I think there’s one scene where everyone is together, and there are instances where they had to composite actors into scenes. You just don’t get the same dynamics and relationships. And since they were no longer constrained by network’s 22 minute runtime, they would let scenes and jokes go on for waaay too long.

  46. Bay Area lefty China Syndrome!

    “Martin Shkreli to join Milo Yiannopoulos at UC Davis speaking event”
    [?]
    “An already-controversial speaking engagement by Breitbart News editor Milo Yiannopoulos at UC Davis is adding another contentious character to its bill: Former Turing Pharmaceuticals CEO Martin Shkreli will also be speaking at the event.”
    http://www.sfgate.com/bayarea/…..854516.php

    Libertarian? Naaah. Making lefty heads explode? Yes.
    And stirring the pot to make lefties act like lefties and admit they are slimy twits who accept opinions which only match what they already bleeve?
    You BET!

    1. I don’t mind Shkreli. Yes he pisses people off, somewhat understandably. But he was clearly right that EpiPens were being sold too cheaply because if I’m not mistaken, the much touted generic competitor that rose up recently is still selling them for more than they were going for pre-Shkreli. Plus if people have such a problem with shit like this happening, mayyyyyyybe it’s time to rethink intellectual property rights.

      1. The with epi pens was less an IP monopoly but the FDA withholding approval from potential competitors.

        1. Yup. Nobody else could get a simple hypodermicdelivery system past the FDA, somehow. Its a mystery.

          1. Obligatory

    2. Wasn’t martin a bernie sanders supporter and donor?

      1. Bernie returned Shkreli’s donation, if i recall correctly. So he put that money toward Wu Tang’s $2 million album.

  47. On Thursday, the Obama administration finalized new rules that allow the National Security Agency to share information it gleans from its vast international surveillance apparatus with the 16 other agencies that make up the U.S. intelligence community.

    With the new changes, which were long in the works, those agencies can apply for access to various feeds of raw, undoctored NSA intelligence. Analysts will then be able to sift through the contents of those feeds as they see fit, before implementing required privacy protections. Previously, the NSA applied those privacy protections itself, before forwarding select pieces of information to agencies that might need to see them.

    No, goddammit, he’s not expanding NSA’s power – he’s extending the “national security” exemption to the Constitution to every fucking badge-wearing jackbooted thug out there.

    1. Remember when the argument for having a secret police state was that we were at war with the tourists and, not to worry, it was only a tiny bit of spying and it was tightly controlled so that there was no way humanly possible this spying could ever be used for domestic surveillance or anything but catching enemy combatants? And then it leaked that the NSA was slipping intel to the FBI on the downlow and the feds were quickly prevented from using this illegal method of fish-tripping by the simple expedient of legalizing fish-tripping? And then they extended that to the DEA and the BATF and DHS and on and on. And now it’s just fucking open season on spying on everybody however you like and nobody gives a fuck any more. Use whatever spying methods you want and when the court’s want to know where and how you obtained this evidence and whether or not you had a warrant, just tell them to fuck off because it’s none of their goddamn business where and how you got the evidence and whether or not you had a warrant – because tourists!

      1. at war with the tourists

        Typo of the day nomination.

        1. Granted they were tourists.

        2. Not a typo – that’s my version of Block Insane Yomamma. Because a war on tourism makes just as goddamn much sense as the war on terrorism.

      2. Those Damn tourists … Get off my lawn!!

      3. I’m pretty sure right now in any major city where they’ve got the resources and the cops with the know-how, you can smart off to a cop and if he takes a notion to, they can break into your house and copy the contents of your hard-drive, install a keystroke logger on your computer, tap your phone, go through all your bank account and credit-card and doctor’s records, all of it with no warrant and no probable cause, until they find something, anything, to charge you with. And when you try to challenge the evidence and how they got it, they just say the magic words “national security” and it no longer matters where and how and why. Warrants and probable cause are secrets and therefore unchallengeable. Your ass is going to jail because you smarted off to some cop who knows how to fuck with you.

  48. Remember when the argument for having a secret police state was that we were at war with the tourists

    The face of the enemy

    1. Those don’t resemble any tourists I see. Granted I see the kind of odd people who think “I’m gonna take a trip to Albany and not to protest the state government!”

  49. Potato skins are a fine thing, but the new pub near the house sells bowls of fried pig fat, which is delightful.

    1. Like cracklin’s? Pictures?

      1. Like bacon if you cut off all the muscle and fry just the fat.

        1. That sounds inferior to the mix of fat and lean found in proper bacon.

          1. (Not that I’d turn down the snack, I’m just saying I think the flavor balance is going to be off)

            1. It’s a good drinking snack. Salty and chewy and complements the beer. I guess there’s nothing it adds over bacon other than being bigger, thicker slices. And I love fat.

              1. You mean Pork Rinds?

        2. Streak o’lean ( bacon that is mostly fat).

    2. Limeys know that food group as ‘pork scratchings’, which unfortunately conjures up images of chronic porcine dermatitis.

  50. “Effective immediately, Cuban nationals who attempt to enter the United States illegally and do not qualify for humanitarian relief will be subject to removal, consistent with U.S. law and enforcement priorities,” Obama said in a Thursday statement.

    Sooo … Florida just went from a crucial swing state to a Red state?

    1. If Iran attacks Israel using the UN’s condemnation as an excuse, it will become an Infrared State.

  51. Remember, Democrats love all immigrants, as long as they don’t vote Republican. Just like they like all minorities, unless they vote Republican.

    Cuban Republicans vote for Trump over Obama and now he gets his revenge

Please to post comments

Comments are closed.