Food Policy

Food Policy Experts Comment on Bests, Worsts, and What's to Come

The year that was and the year that will be.

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Agriculture
Alexkalina / Dreamstime.com

For my last column of the year, I asked a handful of food-policy experts to comment on the year that was and the year that will be in food policy. Their responses are below.

Don Carr, food and agriculture writer

1) What was the best food-policy news of 2016? Why?

Consumers flexing their purchasing muscle to spur food system change when government is paralyzed. My question for the consumer-led, food system reform movement is can it be harnessed to have positive impacts on water, wildlife and our changing climate?

2) What was the worst food-policy news of 2016? Why?

Clearly the election of Donald Trump is bad news for food and farm system reform efforts. The president elect proudly subsists on fast food and is staffing his team with conventional agriculture proponents. His agriculture advisors made a point of calling out food reformers in their talking points, so I'd be surprised if First Lady Michelle Obama's kitchen garden isn't burned to a stubble and the ground salted for good measure. The election is also scary news for effective, low-fraud hunger programs that have been in the crosshairs of Republicans for years.

3) What changes do you think 2017 might bring to food policy? Why?

Based on the following confluence of factors, we are going to see a work on new federal farm bill that will shower tax dollars on the same historically subsidized group of commodity growers like nothing before. 1) These farmers are facing chronic low prices and low income with no help in sight. 2) Trump's stated trade policies could even put them in a bigger hole. 3) Since Trump is demonstrably not "conservative" and Congress continually votes for more farm subsidies there is no ideological barrier in view. 4) The farm lobby is successfully conflating the very real notion that rural America turned out for Trump with the idea that Trump "owes" farmers.

Julie Kelly, food-policy writer

1) What was the best food-policy news of 2016? Why?

Not a lot of good food-policy news in 2016, but I think the delay of the ill-conceived menu labeling is one win. It's an onerous, unnecessary regulation on business that is frankly none of the federal government's business.

2) What was the worst food-policy news of 2016? Why?

Hands-down, the mandatory GMO labeling law signed by President Obama in July. This law tells consumers nothing, will cost food companies millions and leads to more misinformation about biotechnology.

3) What changes do you think 2017 might bring to food policy? Why?

Hopefully, both of the aforementioned labeling laws will be repealed under a Trump administration. I also think you will see some reforms to both SNAP and the National School Lunch Program, as well as a reexamination of strict regulations overseeing genetically engineered crops/food.

Pete Kennedy, Farm-to-Consumer Legal Defense Fund

1) What was the best food-policy news of 2016? Why?

A ruling by a Michigan judge that recognized the property rights of consumers to have their foods processed by someone else into other food products without government interference. This ruling is a significant step forward in establishing that there is a legal distinction between the public and the private distribution of food with the government having no jurisdiction over the latter. The court ruling in the Michigan case protected the right of those having ownership in dairy animals to have their milk processed into dairy products (e.g., cream and butter) by others without government interference.

2) What was the worst food-policy news of 2016? Why?

Passage of the DARK Act, a corporate powerplay that co-opted part of the organic foods industry, trampled States' Tenth Amendment powers and saddled consumers with [a] GMO labeling bill [worse] than the prior bill defeated by GMO-labeling proponents.

3) What changes do you think 2017 might bring to food policy? Why?

Continued passage at the State level of bills that expand consumer access to locally produced foods and deregulate producer to consumer direct sales. More States legalizing the sale of raw milk, getting closer to the point where the federal interstate ban will be meaningless because there will be legal access in every State.

Jeff Stier, National Center for Public Policy Research

1) What was the best food-policy news of 2016? Why?

It may not have made many headlines, but the publication of Professor Jayson Lusk's Unnaturally Delicious: How Science and Technology are Serving Up Super Foods to Save the World delivers a highly accessible look at the food technology that both exists today and is in our near future. Lusk takes readers on a mouthwatering tour of a smorgasbord of new foods, crops and technologies which provide a backdrop for an exciting and truly progressive way to think about the future of food. His insights offer a potential paradigm shift in how we can feed the world healthier foods- that people want to buy and eat. It's a stark contrast from the stale and highly ineffective command and control food police playbook.

2) What was the worst food-policy news of 2016? Why?

While Whole Foods continues to bill itself (and bilk consumers) as "America's Healthiest Grocery Store," it fails to deliver on its promise. Yet in a devastating June 8 warning letter—one of the most severe compliance actions that the FDA has at its disposal—the FDA said Whole Foods was manufacturing, packaging and storing food in ways that promoted contamination with microorganisms that cause food poisoning. The fact that so many problems failed to be detected by Whole Foods' quality-control systems strongly suggests that there are far more safety problems that we don't know about. Yet Whole Foods continues to enjoy a health halo because of it's marketing of so-called natural, local, and organic fare.

3) What changes do you think 2017 might bring to food policy? Why?

In response to the Trump administration's expected easing off of efforts to control how we eat, activists at the state and local level will build off of their gains on issues such as local soda taxes, arguing that without an aggressive federal approach, local governments must step in to fill the void to prevent us from making unhealthy individual choices.

Nina Teicholz, journalist and author, The Big Fat Surprise

1) What was the worst food-policy news of 2016? Why?

The worst food policy news of 2016 was the announcement of the 2015 dietary guidelines [DGAs], which were based on weak science—non-systematic reviews of only a sliver of the relevant science—for another five years of the same non-evidence based nutrition policy that virtually ensures zero progress on reversing the tides of obesity and diabetes in America

2) What was the best food-policy news of 2016? Why?

Acknowledging that the DGAs have completely failed in their mission to protect Americans from nutrition-related diseases, Congress calls for the first-ever major peer review of the DGAs, by the National Academy of Medicine, and appropriates $1 [million] to ensure the review is completed.

3) What changes do you think 2017 might bring to food policy? Why?

I predict the DGAs will change in one fundamental way, at the outset: members of the DGA advisory committee will, for the first time, be required to publicly disclose their conflicts of interest.

NEXT: Trump and the Power of the Presidency

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  1. 2) What was the worst food-policy news of 2016? Why?
    Clearly the election of Donald Trump…

    #TrumpDerangementSyndrome

    Is that a new requirement of the editorial board? Every article must signal Trump hatred at least once?

    1. Immediately followed by the writer who thinks Trump is going to try to repeal said shit.

    2. Yeah, he’s bucking for his own show on the Food Network.

    3. I’m betting that Trump will not try to ban GMOs.

    4. I like to pick on the staff as much as the next guy, but that was the response from Don Carr, not Baylen.

    5. Yeah the partisanship was kinda over the top with that guy, but that was on him not the article as a whole, which was fairly balanced.

    6. Actually, Trump’s election is worse food news than you might think. You might have missed it, but he promised, on Tiwtter, to spit in everyone’s food if they criticized him. It’s an outlandish promise, but I’m still going to avoid takeout till the dust settles.

  2. I am gonna nitpick just for fun:

    There is no such thing as faulty science. Faulty science is not science at all. One can follow the scientific method and possibly make mistakes or one can not follow the scientific method. When one doesnt follow it it isnt science at all.

    1. “Not even wrong.”

    2. Sounds like a religious claim. “The high priest of science is always right.”

      “What about when it’s wrong?”

      “Then it’s not science!”

      1. I was referring specifically to ‘flawed science’. Not scientific studies that arrive at faulty conclusions. If the science itself is flawed then it is deviating from the scientific method and thus not science. What Linnekin is referring to in the article is politics guiding those making decisions about food and nutrition instead of science.

    3. I agree with you.If it ain’t falsifiable it’s not science.

      1. While i understand your claim, I have to Dissagree. Their are plenty of theories (particularly economic ones) that are almost imposible to falsify, either becasue they are based in logical arguments, or their is no feasible way to test them. Does that mean the a bunch of Economics is not a ‘Science’ furthering human knowledge.

        1. “Science is more art than science, Morty.”

        2. Does that mean the a bunch of Economics is not a ‘Science’ furthering human knowledge.

          Absolutely. Economics is like astrology; both rely on real-world observations and complex maths to drive narratives particular to the practitioner. Neither make accurate predictions about the future, but both can be construed, especially to a willing audience, to have clearly explained the past.

          1. Two similarly veined counter points. First, by the logic that economics makes poor predictions (which I totally agree with, and needs to be dealt with) and thus is not ‘science’, are you then claiming that any one who makes a poorly predicting theory is not doing science? So then say you really mean by science is Truth, not a process of asertaining knowledge (Which is my belief). Second there are sometimes multiple ways of formulating theories with equally predictive power. For example Tycho formulated a geocentric view of the solar system that predicted movements of the planets with the same precision as heliocentric models. Predictive power is not sufficient to establish truth.

            1. So then say you really mean by science is Truth, not a process of asertaining knowledge (Which is my belief). Second there are sometimes multiple ways of formulating theories with equally predictive power. For example Tycho formulated a geocentric view of the solar system that predicted movements of the planets with the same precision as heliocentric models. Predictive power is not sufficient to establish truth.

              I don’t think economics can necessarily be called a ‘science’ because there is no right answer, at least by intellectual standards of the field.

              Geocentric and heliocentric models, to use your example, can both be correct in making testable predictions about motions of night sky. The implication is there is a correct answer to begin with, and that is the test.

              Economics is nothing like that. In economics, using same metaphor, the given heliocentric model and geocentric model would both fail to account for motions of night-sky with their predictions, and both heliocentric and geocentric schools would remain convinced their model is right and the other guys’ model is wrong regardless.

        3. I’d call fields like economics “Half-science”, since it doesn’t deal with fundamental truths so much as half-truths.

          Seriously though, what happens when two (different) competing theories, both not falsifiable, also both explain the same phenomenon? I’ll tell you, politics of the field determines the winner. Powerful schools and the biggest egos decide what’s right and wrong and who gets funded. That’s not progress so how can it be science?

          1. I understand the claim “If it’s not falsifiable, it’s not science”, and can be sympathetic to it. I just think the sentiment is overly strict.

            I get that Economics is not the same as Physics, and I’d be the first to argue that, in fact i argue that way with a lot of people who wish Economics was more like Physics. It’s a “Soft Science”. That’s not what I am arguing. What I’m arguing is that there are bits of knowledge and/or Theories that we have from economics that are technically not falsifiable.

            For example the Theory of Comparative Advantage, is technically not Falsifiable, it is a logical conclusion, that once you’ve seen the argument for, you can’t show to be false. Does that mean it’s not science? that it hasn’t added to the body of human knowledge?

            1. Well there can exist knowledge without it being scientific knowledge. I was serious about the “half-truths”. Consider political “science”, a bunch of logical half-truths like A is like B and C is like B, ergo soandso are fascists. This is logic with half truths amounting to worthless BS.

              Having said that, I would agree there is some kind of spectrum between hard science and these kinds of worthless attempts at modeling humanity with single variable models, with some varying degrees of value in between.

          2. Theories are falsifiable. Any unfalsifiable claim is just something someone pulled out of their ass. AGW comes to mind.

            1. Lots of math is unfalsifiable.

              1. This is what I’m getting at.

        4. I’m going to prove you wrong, heretic.

          Socialism works because:

          1. It’s never really been tried.

          and

          2. You don’t even know what socialism is!

          That was too easy.

        5. 1. Logical arguments are falsifiable. 2+2=4, true or false?

          2. No feasable way to test =/= not falsifiable. If its physically possible to set up an experiment that could test a hypothesis then its a falsifiable hypothesis and can be tested by the scientific method even if we won’t *because* of cost, technology, or moral restraints.

          1. Actually no, there is a logical proof showing that 2+2 = 4, but you can’t just test it. You don’t test it over and over to see if the result is always the same, you have to form a logical argument that, if correct, is non falsifiable. This is in contrast to the scientific method. I guess If you pushed me if agree that anything that is not falsifiable is not science, in the strict way that it does not follow the scientific method. My big problem with the phrase is that it is often then used to denigrate (often rightfully, economics was a poor choice of an example.) other fields of inquiry as not valid methods of inquiry. By this strict definition Mathematics is not science, which I concede but then we as society need to put science in its proper place, rather than treat it as the one and only source of truth. In short, my complaint is against scientism.

            1. Are you saying there is no way to set up an experiment where the answer to 2+2 could be something other than 4?

              That’s all falsifiability is.

              Can you set things up where the answer could be different than what you expect? If the answer is what you expect, you haven’t proven anything (more research is indicated, please approve my grant), if its other than you expect, you’ve proven that your hypothesis is not correct (even if its more correct than any other).

              1. Off the top of top my head, I could easily make an argument that 2+2 =11, if we’re allowed to define our terms. (Base 3) Math is logically consistent with math.

                1. Math is logically consistent with math.

                  I thought that was actually part of the definition, so…

                  “There is a range of views among mathematicians and philosophers as to the exact scope and definition of mathematics.”

                  Uh oh. Here’s the one view I was thinking of though.

                2. And you could easily make an experiment where you could confirm or deny that.

              2. Sure you could do that, but that’s not how math is done. Math doesn’t follow the scientific method. You don’t run around measuring triangles to gather evidence that supports the Pythagorean theorem. in that strict interpretation of what is science (I.e. using the scientific method) math is not science.

                1. But you *can*. Not all of math may be able to follow the scientific method, but at least at the lower levels you can.

        6. Does that mean the a bunch of Economics is not a ‘Science’ furthering human knowledge.

          It doesn’t have to be “Science” to further human knowledge, and economics, like the rest of the “social sciences”, is not science in the sense that it doesn’t operate on scientific method. That’s what differentiates social science from the hard sciences (in keeping with the rule that adding the word “social” before any other word completely negates the meaning of the 2nd word. e.g., social security, social justice).

          1. It doesn’t have to be “Science” to further human knowledge, and economics, like the rest of the “social sciences”, is not science in the sense that it doesn’t operate on scientific method

            As i mention to agammamon above, I can agree with that. Insofar as something does not use the scientific method, it isn’t science. But as i continue above, (and you concede) that doesn’t mean there aren’t other fields that further human knowledge, Mathematics is a field that comes to mind. It doesn’t use the scientific method, but no one would say that it is not a valid source of knowledge.

            My big gripe with the offhand remark ” If it’s not falsifiable, it’s not science”, is that most people mean “if its not falsifiable, its not true/not valid”. This is, of course, the fault of the way science is taught, and treated in our society.

    4. Sounds like sumbody doesn’t Fucking Love Science, amirite?

    5. You’re wrong about this. The “scientific method” is not as universal a thing as you think it is.

      Darwinian evolution, for instance, is not something we know because of the “scientific method.” We know it because there is a great deal of evidence in its favor, and because it makes a great deal of sense. That’s about it, and none of it involves the “scientific method,” but we are as sure of Darwinian evolution as we are of anything.

    6. You’re wrong about this. The “scientific method” is not as universal a thing as you think it is.

      Darwinian evolution, for instance, is not something we know because of the “scientific method.” We know it because there is a great deal of evidence in its favor, and because it makes a great deal of sense. That’s about it, and none of it involves the “scientific method,” but we are as sure of Darwinian evolution as we are of anything.

  3. Good morning and happy new year to all.

    1. Same to you and GO BUCKS !!!

      1. GO BUCKS!

        1. Go Bucks!

          1. Go THE Bucks!, tyvm.

            1. NO DUCKS!
              SO CUCKS!
              MO YUKS!

            2. Go Bengals?

              /hangs head in shame

              1. Hey at least they’re not the Clowns

    2. Happy New Year. See y’all Monday.

        1. Tautology is for assholes

        2. C
          U
          Next
          Tuesday!

          God, I loved saying that to some people at work …

      1. Happy New, you glorious bastards. Expect updates throughout the night on how the moves I’m putting on the mother in law are working out.

        1. You’re going to bang your MIL?

        2. So,how much have you had to drink?

          1. Not enough yet. She’s coming into focus, though.

        3. Mililf?

          1. My goal is to get her to say that 3 times fast with her mouth full.

            1. With her mouth full of WHAT?

                1. I’ve seen enough hentai to know where this is going.

                    1. I have to log in to see that and I’ve already done that. “Oh yeah, he rogged in awready, boi.”

                  1. Straff is going to purchase an abnormally large octopus?

            2. That’s a loaded comment .

        4. Ah, straffinrun, such a kidder.

    3. Let’s do this thing.

      All the best to all.

      And I’m only going to say it ONCE.

      1. That is until you get into the Crown Royal again.

        1. Rufus knows how to party.

          1. I’m not so sure about him anymore after the talk about wanting to rub lemon juice in someone’s eye. I feel fearful yet titillated and intrigued.

    4. NO DUCKS!

      1. /threadfuckedagain

    5. Happy New Year!

  4. “2) What was the worst food-policy news of 2016? Why?

    Hands-down, the mandatory GMO labeling law signed by President Obama in July. This law tells consumers nothing, will cost food companies millions and leads to more misinformation about biotechnology.”

    It isnt going to cost food companies anything. It is going to cost consumers millions.

    Yesterday I heard a woman remark to her husband how absurdly expensive steak is. I doubt most people understand where that cost comes from: bullshit regulations and laws, taxes on energy, etc….all the crap that they cheered on without thinking about what it means to them personally.

    1. Raised Prices means less consumption, so in the end the cost is split between consumers and food companies.

    2. If she thinks its absurdly expensive either you were in another country or she’s never left this one.

      1. That graph is at least 10 years out of date. I’m curious to see if that beef uptick has continued.

  5. Tonight I’m having tacos and beer and the Ohio State game.. Tomorrow,Szechuan beef stir fry with peppers,mushrooms water chestnuts and broccoli and fried rice.

    1. and onions of course.

    2. Traditional cabbage and corned beef here. It is a cold rainy day so…perfect.

      1. Black-eyed peas with ham, collard greens, jalapeno corn bread. Plus a couple of bottles of a nice little craft beer called Mueller Leicht.

      2. Do you make your own corned beef?

        1. /these-euphemisms

        2. No, I don’t. It is easier to just buy it and the quality is good.

      3. I’m just going to make a Reuben out of the leftover corned be from Christmas. So same basic principle.

        1. er Corned Beef, you know what I mean.

    3. Burgers and the Clemson game for me.

      1. It’s the Buckeye game! Although,I’m not sure they can pull it off. I thought about burgers. Then again,with tacos and beer I can do my part to increase ‘climate change’ and extend the growing seasons up north.

        1. I think they’re going to win. I just stuck a 3# pork butt in the fridge. Going in the slow cooker tomorrow finished with some City BBQ sauce they gave us with our Christmas ham. Hoping I have some beans in the pantry so I can use up the rest of the leftover ham.

          1. Probably doing leftover chili for dinner. May freshen up with some fresh poblano. May do some potato skins as well. Have those in the freezer from Christmas morning hashbrowns.

          2. fucking dyslexia: “What’s a number 3 pork butt, is that like pencil grades?”

            1. It’s like ranking women only you want the fat ones.

              1. Makes sense *takes notes*

        2. Depends on which Clemson team shows up. The hungry team with something to prove is one of the best teams in the country. The fuck around for three quarters and ride Deshaun for the 4th…

          1. Use the always-reliable transitory feature.

            Ohio State beat Northwestern this year, 24-20.
            Pitt beat Clemson this year, 43-42.

            In this week’s Pinstripe Bowl, Northwestern beat Pitt, 31-24.

            Therefore dOSU should win by 12 points.

    4. Buckeyes game. Good friends of at least 30 years. Views of San Diego from Tijuana to La Jolla. A roast leg of lamb. Bourbon.

      1. I really want to do a leg of lamb some time. Love the rack of lamb at Outback.

        1. Rack: Costco. Best deal around, and best quality.
          Leg: Costco has it sometimes. Variable quality.

          I marinade both in this. Great with fresh pita, toum, and pickles.

          1. Awesome! Thanks:)

    5. What kind of tacos? What kind of beer?

    6. I hope you use some of those recently legal peppercorns. They’re tasty.

  6. Just saw this piece of crap – the EPA “lost” a lawsuit (one I’m sure the EPA funded) to the Sierra Club over dangerous emissions from yeast makers, so now the smell of fresh-baked bread is apparently hazardous to your health. Naturally, this is one of those midnight regs that makes it clear putting people hostile to the agencies in charge of them is not going to get the job done, it’s going to take mass murderers equipped with flamethrowers to clean this poison out.

    1. Nuke them from space ,just to be sure.

      1. Nah. Just equip a large rock to a satellite and go the ol’ kinetic harpoon route. Just as effective without all that tiresome radiation.

        1. Yes, but we have plenty of nukes, and not too many big rocks. That is, unless we nuke the back side of the moon enough times to knock it into the Earth…. I wonder how many orders of magnitude more nukes we would need to do that.

          1. “I wonder how many orders of magnitude more nukes we would need to do that.”

            I have no idea of the amount needed to overcome the Earth’s natural gravitational pull. Perhaps some sort of ion thruster would be in order to accurately target the HQ. Then there’s that whole ‘no tides in the ocean’ thing to deal with afterwards.

            Either way, even a severely fragmented moon descending on the EPA seems to be a bit of overkill.

            Is it not feasable to launch a 100?100 ft rock into orbit and attach it to a satellite?

            I admit the space-based logistics is an entirely foreign concept to me.

            1. Would cost way more just getting the damn thing into space than is worth it (SpaceX is trying to break the $1000 cost per pound problem), unless you’re willing to use nuclear thunder wells, which still require nukes.

            2. I don’t think they make a launch vehicle with a 100ft diameter cargo bay. Then you have to glue the damn thing back together in orbit, and I’m not sure if super glue works well in a vacuum….more trouble than it’s worth.

            3. What you really need is a kinetic harpoon satellite that ‘drops’ tungsten rods. Way more cost-effective.

              1. “Rods of God.” Jerry Pournelle was an advocate of those.

    2. dangerous emissions from yeast makers,

      Alcohol is a dangerous emission?

    3. The EPA and greenie groups like the Sierra club work hand in hand on that kind of thing. The lawsuit is just theater.

      This has been complained about many times here at Reason by commenters and writers alike. This is why I am puzzled over the anti-Trump hysteria from so many. The guy says he wants to do many of the things libertarians have been wanting for decades and said libertarians lose their mind and proclaim him the devil. It makes me wonder.

      1. Do you remember Obama’s campaign promises which won him the election?

        He was the best damned candidate in the history of the country, as long as it was your first rodeo like it was his.

        Then he moved in and shifted almost everything 180 degrees.

        So fuck campaign promises.

        1. And won again.

          I’m not so sure it was his campaign so much as it was the incompetence of his opponents.

          1. He won because every non-black could point to voting for him to prove they weren’t racist.

            And because Obama promised we’d become a post-racial society, which if it would have happened would have been more than enough to justify his presidency.

            Instead, he stirred the pot so much, we’ve got racial unrest like we haven’t seen since the 1960s.

            Thanks, O.

            1. They could just as easily vote against him and make the opposite claim later. Like what many likely did in the grand vote swapping scheme of 2016.

        2. Nobody sane thought Obama was a tax-cutter or deregulator. Some skepticism about Trump is warranted, but let’s avoid cynicism and see how the first six months go.

          1. The funniest thing (this is a tough competition too) about the left’s unhinged reaction to Trump is that Trump is about as Republican/Conservative as Michael Bloomberg. It is as if Trump just forgot to wear the right pin or ribbon and all Hell broke loose.

            I am sure he will prove to be the same tax cutting champion as Bloomberg too.

        3. Scarecrow, all anyone had to do was what I did; look at his record in the IL senate. The guy was a pinko piece of shit then and nothing has changed.

    4. dangerous emissions from yeast makers

      Yet another aspect of the War on Women.

      1. *narrows gaze*

        You know, Rich – I think you beat out Bee Tagger for Most Narrowed Gazes of 2016.

        1. I have to up my game.

        2. I can just see your troops,. “Shit. Guys,. Major Scheiskopf has that narrowed gaze look again. Quick. Look busy.”

          1. Shit. That snark was directed at Herr Servator.

        3. It is a true honor, Sir. Best wishes for the New Year to you and yours.

    5. Nice. Of course, no local cooperation or regulation could possibly solve that problem. The feds need to make one reg to rule them all.

  7. Thanks! Straight news. Variety of sources. No filters. Could you buy a newspaper or five? TV news (right or left)

  8. Happy New Year, everyone.

    Millennial International.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RGvrmltfMrA

  9. Happy New Year! I’m on the Adelaide time at the moment where it’s already 2017.

    1. One hour to go here. The SHTF in 2017, right?

      1. I’m happy to see your still sober enough to tell time.

  10. Happy New Year y’all.

    We here in Asia just stepped into 2017.

    One nice thought – it will be difficult for 2017 to be worse than this last year although I expect it to try really hard.

    1. I hate 2017. I can taste the hangover already.

    2. David Burge ?@iowahawkblog 46m46 minutes ago
      “God, I can’t wait for this crummy year to get over.” – People of 1938

  11. Seems like only a year ago or so that big mouth Ronda Rousey was going around claiming she could beat up anyone in the world, including men. I don’t think so, sweetie. You suck at backing up your ridiculous claims as much as some of the Reason writers suck at defending limited government.

    I predict that in 2017 she follows in the footsteps of Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson and permanently retires from the fight game to become a full time shitty actress.

    1. Seems like only a year ago or so that big mouth Honda Mousey was going around claiming she could beat up anyone in the world, including men. I don’t think so, sweetie. You suck at backing up your ridiculous claims as much as some of the Treason writers suck at defending limited government.

      I predict that in 2017 she follows in the footsteps of Pain “The Cock” Johnson (hehehe) and permanently retires from the fight game to become a full time shitty actress.

    2. I predict that in 2017 she follows in the footsteps of Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson

      She’s going to become the highest paid talent in Hollywood?

      (*note = i have no idea why this is the case, what he ‘acts’ in, or where the money he’s paid actually comes from. its just a mystery which i have no interest in solving)

      1. He has charisma. Even my 80 year old racist father likes him.

    3. Her strategy of, “Here’s my wide open face, please hit it repeatedly” wasn’t the most wise approach I’ve ever seen.

      1. She was trying to protect her groin from the same fate.

        1. You know, with Alan Thicke dying this year,
          I wouldn’t have thought we’d hear much more about “Groin Pains”.

          1. 1) BOOOO!

            2) As sad as Thicke’s passing is, I’d honestly would rather keep the real psychiatrist battling (and appearing to be winning) multiple myeloma, than mourn a pretend psychiatrist who I cannot bring back.

            Happy New Year, Dr. Anacreon. Your well wishes granted upon my return were deeply appreciated. It’s nice to know you were one of the one’s who gave a rat’s patootey about my absence.

            1. Happy New Year to you, too, Dr. Groovus. I hope things work out and 2017 is a year we get to meet in person.

              And thanks for the kind words on the continuing battle. Every bit of support helps, more than you would believe.

              1. Should I go bug all my prog friends for supportive Facebook memes? Because if there’s one thing those people are good at…

    4. I suspect Rousey could kick my ass right now, in the ring, and maybe out of it- I am out of shape and in my 40s. I’m pretty sure that at 20 I could have walked into the ring and crushed her with no specific fight training. I’m also pretty sure that if I trained for a year I’d win in the ring, and I know I’d win out of the ring. There’s something to be said for weighing 190 when reasonably lean, and there’s a reason there are weight classes.

  12. Nina is very concise.

  13. Carr seems worried about Trump.

    “His agriculture advisors made a point of calling out food reformers in their talking points, so I’d be surprised if First Lady Michelle Obama’s kitchen garden isn’t burned to a stubble and the ground salted for good measure.”

    Wait. Isn’t that a good thing?

    1. Carr’s input was light on details and interviewing him didn’t really contribute to the meat of the article. Knowing nothing else about him, a casual reader would assume he’s a generic anti-fast food elitist finger wag. Ergo, he’s almost certainly unbearable at parties unless you are going strictly to eat up all his food. /intuitive personality characterisation from 1 passage

      1. He certainly came across that way.

        I read it as ‘Trump will not ban salt the barbarian’ in an English accent.

    2. Yes. If you want the good things, you have to go down the street. This shoppe is the practice ground for the Democrats.

  14. OT: WaPo publishing fake news about Russian hacking and it spreads like wildfire? Say it ain’t so!

    I hope Greenwald continues to do this as often as necessary until people get why the “fake news” gold rush is censorship concealed within a Trojan horse.

    1. More like a Trojan horse with giant windows so you can peer in and see the Greek soldiers waving at you.

      1. It’s insane and infuriating how obvious it is, but lots of people have put blinders on and willfully refuse to see. The think “If my opponent says it, it must be wrong.” That’s why we need people like Greenwald, because he’s on their side and refuses to participate in the charade.

        Sadly, that just causes many of them to accuse him of being a turncoat. Hopefully his way of looking at things can be replicated and spread throughout the MSM so that the people have legitimate cause to trust what they read in the paper again. There have to be others like him, but none so bold as to stick their own necks on the chopping block time and again to call out the powerful and established in the press. Indeed, not to permit them to weasel their way out of a full retraction of false claims, lest he fact-check them.

        1. The comments are frightening.

          It’s disturbing to note how progressives are suddenly pro-war because they want to stick it to Trump.

          They truly are insane and without principles or reason. Progressivism is a scourge on our intellectual and moral landscape.

          1. +1 on the idiocy of those commenters.

          2. If you want happy comments go to this story about Snowden on PowerLine.

            The blogger writes about how Snowden is a liar and the proof is that a guy who was mentored by the old head of CIA counterintelligence.

            The good news is that most of the comments so far are in favor of Snowden. Strongly so.

            1. It seems to me that Snowden is the opposite of the Russian Hacking story.

              To conservatives Snowden is a traitor for exposing the misdeeds of the NSA. To Liberals Russians are evil for exposing their own misdeeds.

              Neither side disputes the veracity of what was exposed. Just whine about the fact that their secret misdeeds where shown to the world.

              Neither side seems to understand that the whole fiasco could have been avoided if they just hadn’t done bad things to begin with.

              1. Neither side seems to understand that the whole fiasco could have been avoided if they just hadn’t done bad things to begin with.

                “Hadn’t done bad things”? Crazy talk.

          3. It’s disturbing to note how progressives are suddenly pro-war because they want to stick it to Trump.

            Suddenly? They are Stalinists. If anybody is doing anything they don’t like, a war is in certainly in order. If anybody else is warring, then they have a problem.

            The really funny thing is, Trump is about Republican/Conservative as Bloomberg, but he forgot to wear the pin.

            1. Progressives have tended to be less interested in external wars because they were more intent on crushing freedom in the US.

          4. I scanned the comments. Most of the bad ones must be buried, cause all the ones i saw seemed to support glen.

          5. Now the dweebs at DU are prasing McCain and Graham as some sort of prog superheroes, lol. You can’t make this stuff up, and you don’t have to!

    2. …censorship concealed within a Trojan horse.

      More like contained in a vial with white powder.

    3. Yep, this is what the “mainstream” media actually expects America to believe: that Hildog lost the election because John Podesta clicked a CHEAP CANADIAN VIAGRA link in an e-mail.

      The decline in standards and integrity at the Washington Post since Bezos took over has been pretty sad to watch.

      1. Chef Gayzos of A-man’s-con.com!

      2. Yep, this is what the “lamestream” media actually expects America to believe: that Billerydog lost the election because Pawn Schmodesta clicked a CHEAP SPAMADIAN VIAGRA link in an e-mail.

        The decline in standards and integrity at the Fauxington Most since Beeswax took over has been pretty sad to watch.

        1. A thankless job you’ve taken up Pompey: Ho Class Mothersmucker Pompus: Jo Crass SmotherTrucker.

    4. I saw a story about the infected laptop on CNN. CNN at least had the decency to call the malware “alleged” in their headline. I read the story, and was amused at their attempts to blame Russia.

      1. I remember when the Monica Lewinsky story broke and the word “alleged” was overused. Sam Donaldson was doing an interview with PJ O’Rourke, and one of Donaldson’s utterances of “alleged” caused O’Rourke to interject, “Yes, we must only allege that there is an age difference between Clinton and Lewinsky.”

    5. Fucking ridiculous.

      One laptop with malware (disconnected from any network)… and Wapo claims the Russians are hacking our “power grid”.

      Editor’s Note: An earlier version of this story incorrectly said that Russian hackers had penetrated the U.S. electric grid. Authorities say there is no indication of that so far.

      Whoops?

      I honestly can’t believe that anyone at the WaPo thinks they’re improving their credibility with this garbage.

      They know what they’re doing. Run the scare-headline, issue correction after the scare-headline has circled the planet.

      But why? what does anyone really gain? The idea that they’re discrediting Trump seems to be over-done at this point. No one is going to be convinced by more of the same scare-mongering. Everyone who could be sold, already is.

      all they’re doing is making me embarrassed as an American.

      1. I honestly can’t believe that anyone at the WaPo thinks they’re improving their credibility with this garbage.

        I honestly can’t believe they give a damn about that credibility stuff at all.

  15. Happy New Year reprobates. I still hate you all equally. Some more equally than others. Get off my lawn.

    1. I hate you too Troy. Fuck off and have a wonderful new year. Really, I wish you and your family wealth, health and happiness.

    2. Happy New Year and up yours too!

      *waves bourbon glass*

      And same to all the rest of you rustlers, cut throats, murderers, bounty hunters, desperados, mugs, pugs, thugs, nitwits, halfwits, dimwits, vipers, snipers, con men, Indian agents, Mexican bandits, muggers, buggerers, bushwhackers, hornswogglers, horse thieves, bull dykes, train robbers, bank robbers, ass-kickers, shit-kickers and Methodists.

      1. You left out flibbertigibbets. Do you not like flighty, whimsical young women?

      2. I’m a bull dyke trapped in a cis-normative white male body. Full stop.

        1. What’s your golf handicap?

          1. I just made that up so I could try to use female locker rooms. I’ve had some idea what a golf handicap is for most of my life based on context, but finally just looked it up.

      3. Uffda!

        I simply cannot decide which of those that I should check off. Could you do me a solid and let me write in “goat roper”?

        p.s. Happy New Year to you and the rest of the HyR crew.

          1. Hah! Nope we finished up the xmas leftovers a couple days ago with a perfect Minnesoda hotdish.

            Today is a ham. Can’t stand it myself, but the rest of the family loves it. It is in the water with the sous vide dealie running right now.

            By the way. I forgot who on here started talking about sous vide cooking, but I wish I could shake their hand. I have been doing it for about a year now and it has changed the way I cook. It is quite the deal.

            1. Probably me or Jesse. We got Sloopy into it too.

              1. Don’t be modest. Take all the credit. No way Jesse is into sinking his meat into hot moist wet stuff. I see him more into smoking meat.

                Really, thanks for the tip. My kids probably hate you because they have had to listen to me lecture them on the wonders of sous vide (often drunkenly) too many times.

              2. Sloopy is going to need our love and support after Urban Meyer’s team does their imitation of Neil Armstrong’s mailbox. Much love.

                1. SHUT OUT.

                  I’ll rub it in his face.

  16. I’d be surprised if First Lady Michelle Obama’s kitchen garden isn’t burned to a stubble and the ground salted for good measure.

    Even allowing for joking hyperbole, this guy can’t help but let his elitie nannyism shine through. I bet he still thinks Hillary was cheated.

  17. I actually find the new labels very helpful.

    1. Of course you do. How would you know what food to eat without the government telling you?

      1. Shriek is lucky he can actually feed himself enough to live.

        1. Lucky for him, unlucky for everybody else.

        1. They all do. They all want cake.

  18. I’m trying to decide if we should have a cyber war with Russia or if instead we should ally with Russia and Israel and threaten to nuke the rest of the world if they don’t give us their oil and/or used panties. Thoughts?

    1. Weigel, I think you should get shitfaced drunk tonight and drive your car straight into a telephone pole at 70 MPH.

      1. No – I need to stick around to make sure you have something to live for.

        1. Omg I just chortled. The convergence iis eminent!

        2. Are you sure that’s really enough for you to go on living in Trump’s America? You’re already a miserable “sad clown” as it is now with Obama as the president. Can you really make it through the living hell that the next four years are going to be for you? I mean, everyone knows that America is about to morph into the new Nazi Germany. You’ll be lucky if D.C. doesn’t become the new Auschwitz and you aren’t loaded onto a boxcar.

          Is it worth living just so you can meet that as your fate? You don’t have to suffer through all that. You have the power to end all the misery now before it starts. Give in to those urges to end it all that you know you have at the lowest, darkest moments. Just do it.

          1. Are you sure that’s really enough for you to go on living in Pump’s Bumerica? You’re already a miserable “sad clown” as it is now with Block Insane Yomomma as the president. Can you really make it through the living hell that the next four years are going to be for you? I mean, everyone knows that America is about to morph into the new Fonzie Permany. You’ll be lucky if P.C. doesn’t become the new PoshBitz and you aren’t loaded onto a boxcar.

            Is it worth living just so you can meet that as your fate? You don’t have to suffer through all that. You have the power to end all the misery now before it starts. Give in to those urges to end it all that you know you have at the lowest, darkest moments. Just do it.

      2. Spitegel, I think you should get shitfaced drunk tonight and garbledi garble garble garble

  19. For anyone who needs to be reminded of the reason for the season (*cough* straffinrun), let’s honor January 1, observed in Byzantine Christianity (and some other groups) as the Feast of Christ’s Circumcision.

    “The Christian church at first tried to abolish [Saturnalia] as a pagan practice and set up Jan. 1 as a holy day, the Feast of Christ’s Circumcision, to encourage sober behavior.”

    “As the Holy Fathers decided to celebrate the Nativity of Christ on the 25th December, it is natural that the circumcision, which was performed after eight days, is celebrated on the first of January, just eight days after His birth. Therefore on that day the troparia (hymns) bring out the theological importance of circumcision….

    “The rite of circumcision was a painful act, and especially as it was performed at that time. The instruments with which the circumcision was performed were the knife, the razor and the sharp stone….

    “According to Saint John of Damascus, circumcision was a figure of Baptism. Just as circumcision cuts off from the body a part that is not useful, so by Holy Baptism we shed sin, which is not a natural state, but excrement….”

    1. And if don’t need to be reminded (which is all of us who think for ourselves), we can just tell you to fuck off and enjoy 2017 on our own.

      1. That would work too, whatever floats your boat, just keep a safe distance from the ol’ mother-in-law.

    2. That is some creepy, barbaric shit.

      1. I was just trying to scare one specific individual into “sober behavior,” the rest of you I’m sure are fine.

    3. Reading about this is even better when you hum Auld Lang Syne.

    4. Fucking Jews!

      If they had chosen 15 days, I’d be getting even more time off from my German overlords this holiday season. We close from xmas eve to after new year’s because no one would be around anyhow.

  20. Also, Happy 2017 to one and all.

    1. Like I would believe anything from a fucking Chelsea fan.

  21. I think Trump should immediately enact a ban on feeding the trolls punishable by loss of citizenship and/or a year in jail.

  22. The New Year has already begun in some places.

    In Australia, brewery workers are on call to make more beer in case revelers drink it all.

    I’m probably kidding about that part.

  23. Q: “What was the worst food-policy news of 2016? Why?”

    A: “The president elect proudly subsists on fast food and is staffing his team with conventional agriculture proponents.”

    If Donald Trump opened inauguration day by feeding 5,000 homeless people with seven loaves and two fishes, no doubt some people would see it as a harbinger of doom.

    In service industries, they want to underpromise and overdeliver. When people’s expectations are too high, they can be disappointed by even excellent results. When their expectations are lower and you exceed them, that’s what makes them genuinely impressed.

    Some people’s expectations of Trump are so low, if he doesn’t sexually assault anybody, they’ll be impressed. I expect Trump’s negative ratings to improve after he’s in office specifically because of that dynamic. The worst food-policy news is that Donald Trump was elected? How easy will it be for Trump to exceed those expectations?

    What does he have to do to exceed them? How easy will it be for him to not be the worst thing that could happen to food-policy? He won’t even have to try to impress people with expectations that low.

    1. To the left, I don’t think expectations matter. They want power back and will say and do anything to get it. They will spin every little thing into ? personal attack on him. As for his fervent supporters, they’re the ones who have been set up for disappointment I think. I’ll wait until Trump is actually in office to judge whether the latter statement is true. I don’t need to wait to know what the left is going to do though.

    2. What Ken said. Trump’s critics are going to regret building him up as New Hitler. When he proves not to be, it will boomerang on them.

      1. Maybe to normal people Trump’s critics’ painting of Trump to be New Hitler will boomerang on the critics. To the critics, it will just be proof that their criticism and protests worked!

  24. Have a Grouchy New Year, ya fools!

    Random OT question: Has anybody used a Tablo OTA DVR? If so, did you like it?

  25. FINALLY!

    The Libertarian candidate shows he can play in the big leagues. Look Johnson’s foreign policies got diplomats killed!

    Now the Libertarians can be taken seriously.

    1. I laughed more than I should’ve at that.

  26. The government really needs to beef up regulations on pot and spittle. They can be very dangerous!

  27. Congrats people, you did it. No – we did it. HNY !!

      1. Cripple fight !!

        Bless both your hearts.

        1. It’s more like masterbation….

          1. It’s more like masterbation….

            What you did there, I sees it. And I wish I hadn’t, as the Mind’s Eye never forgets…

    1. the competition

      “Can you imagine a job where you are happy to see Chris Christie?”

  28. So straff, did you bang you MIL?

      1. Is that some sort of operation that removes some of her lady parts?

        Good news Straff! Bareback away!!!

        1. Oh and gambatte!

        2. Bareback? That’ll lead to some Jerry Springer shit.

          I say do it.

  29. New Year’s is a horseshit holiday.

    There’s something about it that’s . . . inhuman. It’s a holiday for robots. It’s a holiday for programs with iteration counters.

    You know what’s more impressive than New Year’s?

    Every weekend ever.

    New Year’s is an elitist holiday. Scientists and astronomers calculated how long it would take for us to go all the way around the sun (the elitist buffoons not even knowing we orbited the sun, mind you), and we’re all supposed to be so impressed–that we let them boss us around?

    “The Weekend” is a proper holiday. There were no scientists involved. The priests told us themselves that God took a rest, so making us work seven days a week non-stop was bullshit. And if those priestly bastards are forcing us go to church one day a week, that day doesn’t count as rest. That counts as another work day, so now I need two days off–deal with it.

    1. New Year’s is an elitist holiday. Scientists and astronomers calculated how long it would take for us to go all the way around the sun (the elitist buffoons not even knowing we orbited the sun, mind you), and we’re all supposed to be so impressed–that we let them boss us around?

      ??? Can’t tell if serious?

      New years was celebrated in ancient Mesopotamia, but was celebrated in March, because equinox.

      Modern January 1st New Years is a product of the Romans and has to do with the consuls’ office, not scientists and astronomers.

      1. “New years was celebrated in ancient Mesopotamia, but was celebrated in March, because equinox.”

        AKA “astronomers”.

        1. Try ‘priests’ Ken.

          1. You’re being ridiculous.

            1. No, you’re being ignorant, the movement of the heavens was a central component of Mesopotamian religion.

              1. So you’re saying my academic argument as to why weekends are better than New Year’s is based on a lie?

                Have you ever been formally diagnosed with an autism spectrum disorder?

                That scientists were priests in antiquity is hardly an interesting observation. It was like that with the Babylonians, the Persians, the Mayans, . . .

                The priests that gave us the weekend weren’t using the stars. They were using the ten commandments.

                That any of these things needs to be explained is ridiculous. It’s like you’re walking into the Abbot and Costello’s “Hoo’s on First” routine, and not realizing that–it’s not supposed to be taken to seriously. It’s supposed to be funny!

                I bet you’re a lot of fun at parties. Maybe you’re an objectivist or something? Don’t worry, tonight you can get together with you friends and tell them that you saw someone claiming online that weekends are better than New Year’s and you prove them wrong.

                LOL

                Oh, in addition to weekends being better than New Year’s, pirates are better than ninjas because pirate wenches are hot and ninjas hardly seem to have any women around.

                Are you going to prove me wrong on that one, too?

                Or maybe you’re going to claim that some ninjas were pirates, too!

                1. Hence, Ken, the “Can’t tell if serious”. Given your habit of writing long winded nonsense diatribes based on faulty premises it shouldn’t be surprising. And I’m sure throwing hissy fits and screaming “AUTISTIC” at people just makes you a freaking blast at parties.

                  1. Well, that escalated quickly.

                    1. “Well, that escalated quickly.”

                      I calmly responded to three ridiculous posts before I escalated.

                  2. And I’m sure throwing hissy fits and screaming “AUTISTIC” at people just makes you a freaking blast at parties.

                    I hire a guy to do that at all my holiday parties. Helps break the ice. Also gets everyone to drink more.

        2. but was celebrated in March, because equinox.

          Little did we know that the band Styx titled their albums because of Mesopotamian influences.

      2. I refuse to add a leap second this year!

    2. Is this the place to thank the bomb throwing leftards for not killing anybody in the West on NYE?

  30. Whale in the East River*

    *not a river, but still. ‘estuary’ sounds lame.

    1. Even the animals have TDS.

    2. And somehow the cops are involved?

      1. This is the biggest thing to happen to the River Cops since they dragged another body out of the water this morning.

    3. Nice URL. I thought: Jeez, are there “police whales” now?

      1. Why not? One recently got elected governor in a noted toxic waste dump.

    4. I see the pic was taken by the NYPD Special Ops. Good to know they are out cruising around making sure it wasn’t a suicide bomber whale.

      Notice the fuel/oil sheen glistening on the surface ahead of the whale .

  31. If the “Russians are hacking the power grid” story hasn’t done it for you, AP has more quality journalizing =

    Trump co-chair wishes death on Obama, calls 1st lady male

    ALBANY, N.Y. (AP) ?
    … Carl Paladino, a millionaire real estate developer who unsuccessfully ran for governor in 2010 as a Republican, made the comments in response to a survey by Artvoice , a Buffalo publication that asked local artists, performers and business owners for their New Year’s wish list.

    Asked what he would most like to happen in 2017, Paladino responded that he hoped “Obama catches mad cow disease after being caught having relations” with a cow, dies and is buried in a cow pasture.

    Asked who he would like to see “go away,” he said Michelle Obama.

    “I’d like her to return to being a male and let loose in the outback of Zimbabwe where she lives comfortably in a cave with Maxie, the gorilla,” he wrote.

    I confess = this one was more-entertaining than the freakout about a laptop with malware in Vermont.

    1. “Associated Press writer Jake Pearson contributed to this report from New York.”

      Attaboy Jake. /ruffles hair.

    2. Unlike that college professor who called for genocide against whites, Paladino’s suggestion that it was meant in humor fell on deaf ears.

      1. NOT FUNNY!

  32. “better late than never?”

    Maybe ‘adding insult to injury’, can’t really decide

    Geraldine Ferraro’s son pardoned for 1988 cocaine conviction

    MONTPELIER, Vt. (AP) ? The son of former vice presidential nominee Geraldine Ferraro has been pardoned by the governor of Vermont nearly 30 years after he was convicted of selling cocaine to an undercover officer.

    John Zaccaro Jr. was a Middlebury College student when he was arrested in 1986 and accused of selling $25 worth of cocaine to an undercover state police officer. He was convicted in 1988 and served four months under house arrest. At the time, Ferraro accused prosecutors of unfairly targeting her son because of her high profile after becoming the Democratic vice presidential nominee in 1984.

    If his criminal record had any adverse effects on his life, i presume most of them would have already come and gone by this point. It just reminds us how stupid the drug war is.

  33. Happy New Year, rat bagging tea fuckers! Ok, it’s not the new year, yet. But when it is, I will be here to declare 2017 year of the cisheteropatriarchy! Boo haa boo hah boo hah!

    1. According to the Reason Zodiac calendar, 2017 is the Year of the Hair, which means that Trump and Rico’s powers will be doubled.

      1. Which will in turn, double the power of TDS.

      2. Which means the references to them will double as well.

        The jokes wear thin so Robby’s hair never has to.

      3. Which means the references to them will double as well.

        The jokes wear thin so Robby’s hair never has to.

        1. The squirrels are coming from inside my phone!

          1. First read that as, “The squirrels are coming inside my phone.” Perhaps I need a short break from these here depraved threads.

            Also, euphemisms….blind squirrels….nuts, etc.

      4. It makes me wonder if Robby really will try to cut us off. He knows he loves us.

        Besides, he’d miss out on stuff like this.

  34. A Happy New Year to the degenerate sinners and perverts of the HitnRun community. People bitch about 2016 being terrible, but remember, we reaped a rich harvest of progressive tears at the end.

    Here’s to 2017, and all the whining and dead celebrities it will bring.

    1. “A Happy New Year to the degenerate sinners and perverts of the HitnRun community.”

      But what about the rest of us besides Crusty and SF?

      1. Hmm, yes, the “rest of you”.

        (I’ve been using this clip way too much lately, but it’s just so good)

    2. but remember, we reaped a rich harvest of progressive tears at the end.

      We sure did. For four years I predict there won’t be any droughts in Calizuela.

  35. Krugman still freaking out

    “If James Comey, the F.B.I. director, hadn’t tipped the scales in the campaign’s final days with that grotesquely misleading letter, right now an incoming Clinton administration would be celebrating some very good news. Because health reform, President Obama’s signature achievement, is stabilizing after a bumpy year.”

    So Pauly Poo doesn’t get the memos anymore? It’s the Russians fault, you dummy.

    “Or they would be here to stay if the man who squeaked into power thanks to Mr. Comey and Vladimir Putin wasn’t determined to betray his supporters, and snatch away the health care they need.”

    Ok, that’s better, good little proggy.

    “To appreciate the good news about Obamacare you need to understand where the earlier bad news came from.”

    Ok, go on, progspain it Pauly Poo.

    “Why do the Republicans hate health reform?”

    Duh, the same reason they hate the children and want the terrorists to win.

    “If, as seems all too likely, a health care debacle is imminent, blame must be placed where it belongs: on Donald Trump and the people who put him over the top.”

    We’re doomed I tell you, without this horrible atrocity called the ACA, doomed!

    1. Ahem. Me portraying a NYT commenter. /blows into harmonica.

      ‘Thank you Mr. Krugman for speaking the truth! Thank you, thank you, thank YOU! It’s nice to read thoughtful articles when done by intellectual adults. Republicans are just really, really bad people and I can’t for the life of me understand why people don’t understand this fact. Indeed, it should be an axiom: All Republicans, conservatives and their supporters are pussy grabbing, bullying meanies. Also, Paul. Do you I would love to read an article sharing your thoughts about what we should tell our children.’

      1. I am going to create a NYT account just to post this as a comment

        oh, boo, its closed.

        1. It’s generic. You can apply it to all of his articles I reckon.

          1. Self-editing.

            ‘Thank you Mr. Krugman for speaking the truth! Thank you, thank you, thank YOU! It’s nice to read thoughtful articles when done by intellectual adults. Republicans are just really, really bad people and I can’t for the life of me understand why people don’t understand this fact. Indeed, it should be an axiom: All Republicans, conservatives and their supporters are pussy grabbing, bullying meanies. Also, Paul. I would love to read an article sharing your thoughts about what we should tell our children.

        2. WilL fit right in, they’ll think you’re one of them. Then say something about how on the evening when we should have finally broken the glass ceiling and elected the first female president, you were walking in Central Park, wearing the shoes you really like, the ones with the little bows, so carefree, and even the geese and the squirrels seemed to be smiling to themselves and then BAM BOOM SCHLONGE! PEALS OF THUNDER AND A GREAT TRUMPET SOUNDED!

          1. Breaking glass? Krugman is all over that!

      2. You could pass for a NYT commenter with that.

    2. “If James Comey, the F.B.I. director, hadn’t tipped the scales in the campaign’s final days with that grotesquely misleading letter, right now an incoming Clinton administration would be celebrating some very good news. Because health reform, President Obama’s signature achievement, is stabilizing after a bumpy year.”

      Comey shouldn’t have closed the investigation in the first place.

      And Lynch shouldn’t have met with Bill Clinton.

      1. Lynch meeting Bill was totally proper, nothing like that letter.

        In seriousness if anyone is to blame for misconstruing the letter shouldn’t it be Chaffetz?

    1. As in Helsinki, Sweden

      1. Ah, a ‘Die Hard’ reference.

        1. Asian Dawn?

          1. I read about them in Time magazine

  36. Happy New Year’s, everyone! You’ll be glad to know that we had a nice meetup yesterday.

    1. No Trumputins crashed the party?

      1. No, everyone was cool.

  37. Saw an article about Muscle Shoals being made into a historic monument here.

    I have actually visited a number of “historic” recording studios in the US that still exist.

    (e.g. the O.G. Sun Records & RCA studios in Nashville Stax theater in Memphis, above-mentioned Muscle Shoals in AL, Van Gelder’s in NJ, Electric Ladyland, Riversound, Firehouse, numerous others in NYC, etc)

    the things i’ve found most interesting about what they had in common =

    they are much smaller than you’d expect. both the live rooms themselves, and the whole facilities. look at the building above. I think it used to be a funeral home. I think the effect is that anyone ‘non-essential’ is convinced to leave.

    they are generally unimpressive, physically. none have any fancy sound-reinforcement or floating panels. just carpeted floors and walls with cloth-covered deadening, low ceilings. they smell like cigarettes. none feel ‘prestigious’ at all. In fact – the opposite: they feel like a mildewed basement where you know no one cares if you spill a beer. more than “cozy”, they’re sort of grimy. OK to spend a few hours in, but you don’t want to lounge around.

    they have very little distance between the engineer & performers. many modern studios are totally different, where sometimes the engineering booth isn’t even visible, much less ‘right on top of you’.

    1. *never been to the OG motown studios, but i saw that “Standing in the Shadows of Motown” movie and it was much the same. basically in the garage of a renovated house. more than 5 people and you’re basically rubbing elbows.

    1. “Oh yeah, definitely, I really think that we really need to start viewing human rights as more important than gun rights,” one Hillary supporter replied.

      In other words, “I don’t know what words mean.”

      A Human Right

      1. On that note, I like Mosins, but I have a soft spot for Lee-Enfields.

        1. I put a synthetic stock on mine. I’m classy like that.

          1. Before I went on my shooting hiatus, I thought about doing that. Then I decided that I would just buy something with a synthetic stock. Then I went on my shooting hiatus.

        2. Finn Mosins are the best Mosins. It is known.

          Also, get yourself some Czech Mausers. I love the VZ-24.

          1. I have a Kar 98k Russian capture. No VZ 24, though I would like one.

            I have a M1891 built on an 1894 Chatellereault receiver. I discovered, after I bought it, that it has Finnish Army marks. I mistook the marks for something else because the Finns didn’t fully stamp their SA mark.

            I would like an M39.

    2. Hundreds? Yeah, I know, math and history are not their forte.

  38. 3 Miami cops fired for jokes about using black neighborhoods as shooting ranges

    Well, I guess the good news it is possible for a cop to get fired for something besides *not* shooting someone.

    1. They should have just stuck with shooting blacks in those neighborhoods and gotten free vacations and probably promotions instead of getting fired.

  39. Guy I knew when I lived in Chicago writes article for Vox;

    http://www.vox.com/first-perso…..ocial-life

    Mommas, don’t let your boys grow up to be comedians

    I got featured in another one of his articles a few years ago:

    Open mics draw many sorts. There are young comedians working out raw ideas, some of whom vanish, some of whom flourish. There are seasoned performers experimenting with new bits and honing their chops for their next booked gig. There are “local characters” doing unstructured monologues, getting some attention. And there are outliers — performers who are so strange that it’s hard to figure where else they might fit in.

    Thomas Harty is, at least for now, an outlier. He’s only done stand-up for a couple of months, and his comedy career could go any number of ways. But right now, he’s an outlier. And the open mic at Quencher’s is his wheelhouse, his place to unpack his more complex ideas.

    ….

    Tonight, Harty doesn’t hit many hard punchlines, but he does expound on the etymology of “karaoke,” the inner workings of the Church of Scientology, the Pre-Socratic philosopher Thales of Miletus, and how he got a CIA t-shirt. It’s the most informative stand-up set I’ve seen in a while.

    1. Some things seem to have been invented so that people will have something to do while they drink.

      Bowling, pool, poker, karaoke, philosophy . . .

      And I’d add comedy. Comedy clubs make their money selling drinks, right?

      “Tonight, Harty doesn’t hit many hard punchlines, but he does expound on the etymology of “karaoke,” the inner workings of the Church of Scientology, the Pre-Socratic philosopher Thales of Miletus, and how he got a CIA t-shirt. It’s the most informative stand-up set I’ve seen in a while.”

      That might be interesting under normal circumstance. After you’ve had a few drinks, I’d think that would be awesome.

      I had a bartender friend who was trying to be a comedian. She did really well for a long time–got a lot of laughs and everything. One day she tweeked her act, and she bombed bad. It was once. It only happened once. She could never get herself to go back on stage again. She gets that thousand yard stare every time she talks about it–like she’s reliving it all over again.

      1. Point was, I bet it wasn’t anywhere near as bad as she thinks it was.

        I’ve seen drunk people have a good time even as a comedian bombs. Not even the performers should take comedy too seriously.

      2. I went on stage about 500 times and only bombed 2 or 3 times. And even when that happened, it gave me a few new jokes. I told the story of my “Charge of the Light Brigade” moment one time and when I was done, the host went to the microphone and said “that was magnificent, but it is not comedy.”

        Another time, it was a quiet summer evening and the windows were open. I said “my God, if I tell a joke and none of you laugh, there will actually be crickets chirping.”

        1. Ha!

          Isn’t “alt-comedy” now a thing?

          Maybe you were just ahead of your time!

    2. Do you have any video of you doing stand up?

      1. Yes, but unfortunately the sound quality is awful. You have to turn it up all the way to hear.

    3. I gave up drinking when my pancreas exploded.

      Technically, that’s not a choice; that’s something forced upon you.

      he does expound on the etymology of “karaoke,”

      really? sounds hawaiian, but i’ll guess japanese, and its something like “sing alone”

      1. 1979, Japanese, from kara “empty” + oke “orchestra,” the latter a shortened form of okesutora, which is a Japanning of English orchestra.

        “Japanning” is what i really learned today.

        1. karate = empty hands, as in fighting without a weapon

          1. My friend Sylvia lived in japan. Her Japanned name was “Siru-bee-ya”. It still makes me laugh.

              1. very close, just add a “u” sound in the middle.

                apparently “yl” and “v” sounds are uncommon (if not unknown) in japanese

    4. Dameron’s catchphrase: I’m Emerson Dameron; I’m bad and I’m bold. I drink PBR and I piss Cuervo Gold.

  40. Move over, microaggressions. Say hello to micro-cheating

    1. Note to self: If you ever meet M?lanie Berliet, run away.

    2. Wide range on those ones. Some I can see as being “unfaithful” but some are just plain ridiculous.

    3. I think Thought Catalogue and The Washington Post might as well merge at this point

    4. 2. Giving a waitress or a bartender an obscenely large tip just because she’s hot AF.

      Look, hon, which tip would you rather her give her?

    5. I constantly flirt with women. I flirt with waitresses when I’m out with my wife. She thinks I’m hilarious. It’s not cheating, it’s being alive.

      1. ^This

        Same here. Better yet, a lesbian bartender tried hitting on my wife once while we were sitting together at a bar. I started playing it up and making frivolous requests to highlight that the fact that the bartender was trying to ignore me. “See, she didn’t bring me extra sugar for my tea that I asked for five minutes ago. Now, you take out a cigarette and I bet she zips over here and lights it for you.”

        Anyone who sits around fretting about that kind of thing is someone you don’t want to fool with anyway. It is indicative of deep problems.

  41. Amusing Monarch Deaths

    Henry I of England- died aged 67; apparently from eating a surfeit of lampreys.

    “Ladies and gentlemen, put your hands together for Henry and the Surfeit of Lampreys!”

    1. I like eels,
      Except as meals.
      And the way they feels.

      –Ogden Nash

      1. Eel Avacado handrolls FTW

        1. AAHHKK!

          What is wrong with you?

          1. Eel is terrific sushi/sashimi/roll all the time, any time.

    2. Derpetologist, we missed you at the meet-up last night! We had a really great turnout and good times.

      They had terrific homemade deep-fried chicharrones served warm and crunchy, a big basket for just $5 — it would be worth going there again just for that.

      Cool dive with ample parking, easy access right off the freeway, an incredible whisky selection and everything reasonably priced — all of these things so rare in SF, that we should make this the official HnR meetup site.

      Thanks to Papaya for setting it all up!

      1. Was it at Southern Pacific Brewing? I like that place.

        1. No, a place called Broken Record.

          Note their photo gallery of pictures of their bar back. Gotta like a place that’s proud of their bottles.

          You would like how it’s much easier access and a shorter drive for those coming up from the south.

          1. Do you know if you will be available next May, Anacreon? I haven’t gotten back to Papaya yet, but I am hoping you will be amenable to a Meet & Greet. Dr. ZG is rather piqued about it, actually.

            1. Right now it looks like we’ll be around for most of May, though there is a big conference I always go to that month (although in San Diego this year, so it’s easy travel and I won’t be gone long).

              Keep us posted. I’m sure Papaya would be thrilled to put together something for your visit.

              1. Sure. And we should do this again before May, too.

    3. “In 1702, William [III] died of pneumonia, a complication from a broken collarbone following a fall from his horse…Because his horse had stumbled into a mole’s burrow, many Jacobites toasted “the little gentleman in the black velvet waistcoat.”

      (I have too much taste to do Edward II)

  42. Happy Goyishe Rosh Hashanah!

  43. Ronda Rousey got destroyed last night in her comeback fight.

    It’s good and bad for the sport.

    On the one hand, womens’ MMA would get lots of attention again if she had come back big and been dominant again.

    On the other hand, this loss suggests that women’s MMA isn’t a sport where you can be the champion just because you’re good “for a girl”. The attention Rousey brought to the octagon drew more women into the sport–and there are some legitimate bad ass chicks competing for the championship now.

    In other words, it isn’t an oddity anymore.

    I don’t know what it is that makes me more interested in certain women’s sports. I don’t watch men’s MMA very much, but I like watching the women. It’s that way with beach volleyball, too. I’m not interested in watching women play basketball, hockey, or football either–but those are sports I played.

    I guess it’s the difference between watching to live vicariously and watching for pure spectacle. I don’t live vicariously through women, and when I’m watching football (or boxing, even), I’m thinking about what I would do if I were that athlete or coach. From a pure spectator’s perspective, though I’d rather watch women . . . just generally.

    1. I’ve never seen a single women’s MMA fight, and have no interest in starting.

      who else was on the card? anything good?

      1. Women fight differently.

        Their personalities are obviously different. They build up to fights differently.

        They even win differently.

        The woman that knocked Rousey out walked around the ring with her finger over her lips in the universal hush position–apparently, she didn’t want people cheering Rousey losing like that.

        . . . that was after she beat Rousey’s face in.

    2. I wish Andy Kaufman was still around so he could challenge her to a fight. Come back Andy, make women’s MMA great again!

      1. He is alive. In fact, in just about a month he will be sworn in as the next president of United States of America.

    3. She’ll probably retire after that.

      I don’t think she needs to. She probably still has it. She was just totally stunned from the first punch, looked totally flatfooted and stood there and took it instead of fighting. My theory is she built up her return in her head and her nerves got to her.

      Disappointing to say the least. But the fight right before it with Garbrandt was awesome.

      1. She’s not a boxer, and everybody knows her weakness now.

        It works that way in football, too. It often happens that you have a quarterback that comes in with an unconventional style, and he runs or passes all over everybody in the NFL his first year. It isn’t that he loses his ability his sophomore year. It’s that once everybody has video on him from his first year, they can study the tape in the offseason and pinpoint his weaknesses.

        It takes an amazing quarterback to adapt to that after the greatest minds in football have spent months conspiring to destroy your game. The Peyton Mannings of the world are the ones who they can’t find any obvious weaknesses to exploit–or who can change his technique to something else once they spot a weakness.

        In boxing, if you have a glass jaw, there’s no amount of training or strategy that can compensate for that. Hit ’em in the chin and they go down. Looks like Ronda effectively has a glass jaw. Anybody and everybody that she fights will always come after her jaw.

        Yeah, she’s done.

    4. The reality will set in that women’s success is predicated on how masculine they are. Then both sexes will lose interest.

  44. The final plunder

    http://hotair.com/archives/201…..-agencies/

  45. Bama favored by 13.5. seems about right. I was thinking somewhere in the 14-17 range.

    1. Serious question:
      Where does UW keep getting all of these Polynesians?

      1. I’m guessing Polynesia.

        Maybe “we’re closer to home than Alabama”?

        1. You know what I mean. University of Utah and BYU have the Mormon missionary pipeline from Samoa, Tonga, and Hawaii. I have no idea how UW does it, though.

          1. Yeah, I know – not sure; is there a particularly large Polynesian population in Washington, perhaps? Are these “local” boys?

            1. is there a particularly large Polynesian population in Washington, perhaps

              huh. the one Samoan guy i know? lives in WA

              1. The Tuiasosopo family is from LA, but they moved to Seattle.

  46. WTF is this split screen bullshit?

    1. How much have you drank already?

      1. Ok, I found out ESPN2 has the “multiscreen”. Espn is ok. I was like wtf. I dont have 8 eyes.

      2. Prolly not drinking today. May spike my coffee.I do have a big ass bottle of Maudite in the fridge though so we’ll see:)

        1. I have a bottle of tequila, a bottle of Brazilian cachaca and the wife has this amarula stuff and some egg nog. Haven’t drank anything yet, but thinking about getting into this rum. We also have some champagne sparkling wine for midnight. If I get into the tequila… no I’m not doing it, maybe just one…

          1. Manager at the liquor store pulled a bottle of Stagg Jr. out of the back room for me; will have to carefully (134+ proof) sample that later on, after the champagne.

            1. Didn’t even realize there was a Jr. version.

          2. Yeah, I have assorted booze laying around, I’m just not sure I want to get into it. Wife is sick and I’m not going out anywhere. I’ll more than make up for it this winter:) I wish the games we another night.

            1. We’re not going out either. Traffic here is insane and cops every fucking where trying to be heroes by busting drunk drivers. Wife and I also just getting over the flu, but the alcohol is helping a little for now. I have pretty much everything in the house as far as alcohol is concerned, except for beer, I’m out of that.

              1. Just had a coffee with rumchata. Have a half bottle of E&J in pantry. Wish I hadn’t drank all the eggnog. Usually have cream but wife used it all so can’t whip any up.

                1. Went with hot cocoa and horchata. Yeah I know, weak sauce but along with a tramadol I’m doing ok and will be up early hangover free:)

                  1. No chance at all I’m getting up hangover free, I’ve nearly finished almost a fifth of tequila, but I’ll be fine by 9am and a cup of coffee.

  47. Can any of you twitter heads tweet espn announcers and tell them their split screen sucks balls! I hope they don’t do the OSU game like that! Argh

  48. Before I get otherwise distracted (by, say, the 1980 Cuv?e Dom P?rignon we’re going to open), a Happy New Year to all of you. May the recent flood of proggie tears sustain us through the no-doubt-inevitable nut punches of 2017.

    1. For the record: the Dom was, as feared, beyond hope – it had been stored improperly and the cork was shot – there was 2 1/2 inches of air in the neck; it was beyond even “it’s a really high-quality vinegar”. I consoled myself with Tito’s.

    1. It was coming right for us!

    2. imminent threat to the officer’s safety

      This needs to be linked to a montage of where cops shoot dogs through fences, chained to posts, are on the owner’s leash… or where there’s no danger at all, but they just start shooting anyway and put other people’s lives in danger

  49. Now tell us what you really think. Man, if this is how the average European thinks about Muslims how could this possibly end well?

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YfIkiny_O14

    1. I’m betting…fans of Trump?

      1. But what to do? Should the government round ’em up and deport ’em?

        Then I got to thinking. ‘Member the time when The Gruesomes and The Flintstones got together to get rid of the Hatrocks who had overstayed their welcome? Well…take a look:

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NRTNtbfiO4A

        Soooo, why not do something like this. Play nothing but The Beatles and make Europe a pork only zone.

        1. That was a fun old clip to see, thanks for posting.

          It was truly amazing the impact that the ‘mop-top’ early Beatles had on American culture. There’s practically an episode of every sitcom during 1964-5 where there was some version of the Beatles and how shocking they were to the status quo. (My personal favorite was the Dick Van Dyke Show’s “The Redcoats are coming!” featuring Chad and Jeremy as The Redcoats, as a Beatles stand-in for their episode, about the British Invasion. The Redcoats were hiding at the Petry’s before their performance on the Alan Brady show (i.e the Beatles on Ed Sullivan) and when rabid teenage girl fans found out, they stormed the Petry house and stole everything within, including furniture, on the belief that one of the boys might have touched it.)

          Also, whenever I see the old Flintstones, I wish that I had a little xylophone riff like they do for every time I had to run away.

          1. The impact of The Beatles was a phenomena indeed.

            The Flintstones are timeless.

      2. I am not learned in the language and I cannot trust the translation(s).

        1. The translation is fine.

    2. if this is how the average European thinks

      You know Italians, Rufus. you could ask those same people what they thought of, say, LeBron James… and you’d get at least 2 or 3 going, “he’s a retarded monkey who is ruining all of sports”. And they’d say this even if they’d never seen him play. that’s just how Italians roll.

      The same ‘man on the street’ interview in Germany or Sweden or the Netherlands would be more-characteristic of the typical ‘loathe to share an unpopular opinion’-European POV. They’d say, “there are problems, but what can you do?”

      I’m not saying the italians are wrong to complain; i’m just saying its a bit sensationalized.

      I do think that this sort of stuff IS changing the social dynamic everywhere. things like “passive dislike of immigration” can be lurking in the background for decades on a slow boil, but then all of a sudden, mass opinion can change very very quickly.

      I don’t think immigration is a real problem in the US (at least not the way some would have you believe); but i think its really a perceived problem, and you can’t handwave it away and not take those perspectives seriously, or else they will simply harden and get more dogmatic. and i think a lot of that has already happened/is happening.

      1. Oh, I know. Actually, the average Italian is more in line with the Europeans you mentioned. But they’re also more willing to call a spade a spade.

        I think these were Sicilians so they have a different perspective and dynamic to deal with.

        I’m guessing you can find North Americans who would say similar things if they’re willing to say it in front of the camera. The comments seem to fall in line with this assertion.

        Anyway, you should see what Christian Arabs say about Muslims.

        1. you should see what Christian Arabs say about Muslims.

          You don’t need to tell me. One of my best friends in college was a christian Egyptian, and (during a discussion about how anti-israeli-sentiment is used by arab politicians) he made a comment I have repeated many times =

          “You know who is the only group all Arabs hate even more than the Jews? Other Arabs

          his point was that in-group/out-group politics is what arab society is all about. Its always “the hated” vs. your own in-group. Its the nature of tribalism.

          e.g. Your family vs. other families/your tribe vs other tribes/your religion vs. the fucking shiites or druze or whomever/your country vs other countries/all arab countries vs. the fucking persians/ all muslim countries vs. the non-muslim countries….. ad infinitum

          While i think Marshall McLuhan was *mostly* full of shit… his point about the ‘tribalizing’ effects of media helps explain why you see more and more of this same attitude popping up in the West lately.

          1. Same here. Aside from being married into them, a girl we hung out with in College was Egyptian and she (stylish gal she was) had some choice warnings for us about Muslims.

            True story. My brother in law once struck a conversation with the owner of a Lebanese take-out place as we waited for our food. We got to talking about Muslims and next thing we know the guy was angry enough talking about them to walk out in disgust and let his colleague finish off our order.

            ?\_(?)_/?

        2. “Anyway, you should see what Christian Arabs say about Muslims”
          My wife is half Lebanese from a large family in Detroit and Dearborn. They’re all Catholics. They’ve been there since the patriarch and matriarch immigrated to Ellis Island in the early 20th century. Aside from raw kibbeh and grape leaves They have nothing in common with Muslim immigrants. My only interest is in the raw kibbeh and grape leaves. And meat pies. And spinach pies. And baba ganoush. But I digress. Yeah Arabs are not a monolithic group and the Christians have no love for Muslims.

      2. “And they’d say this even if they’d never seen him play. that’s just how Italians roll.”

        This is why I was apprehensive to post the video. From my experience with them, it’s not how they roll. They’re actually pretty tolerant. Not sure where you get that.

        http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..e-you.html

        1. i wasn’t suggesting it was because italians are necessarily more racist than other Europeans…. its that they’re (in my personal experience) more *emphatic* about any opinion they happen to have

          e.g. when something is “good”, its wildly praised. if something is bad? let a million people shit on it.

          1. Thanks for the explanation. I think that’s about right. Much like Philadelphia and Montreal sports fans!

  50. OT: How to lose like a man.

    Very inspiring.

    1. That was pretty great. Grace in defeat is difficult.

    2. Hillary isn’t breaking THAT glass ceiling anytime soon.

      1. she breaks just like a little girl

        1. *Somewhere, OMWC is fondly fapping nodding in agreement to this*

  51. 2) What was the worst food-policy news of 2016? Why?

    Clearly the election of Donald Trump is bad news for food and farm system reform efforts. The president elect proudly subsists on fast food and is staffing his team with conventional agriculture proponents.

    What the fuck man.

    1. What does fast food have to do with anything here? Is this ‘expert’ an organic food proponent?

    2. How the fuck does he see a *Clinton* administration doing a fucking thing any differently?

  52. Shit man. The first two people aren’t even ‘experts’. They’re basically science-writers.

  53. S novym godom! Vsjo s novymj schast’em! HAPPY NEW YEAR, REASONOIDS!

      1. Net. Konechno, AKVAVEET. *chuckles* (Stone cold sober for realz – wifey and in-laws, OTOH….)

        1. Akvavit reminds me of the motherland. Too bad I don’t drink liquor.

          1. Too bad I don’t drink liquor.

            I’d call you a fag, but that would be an insult to all the fine upstanding homosexuals who are manlier than you because they drink liquor.

            1. I’ll still call you a fag, Jimbo, so’s the fine upstanding homos know to avoid your cheap, vulgar, turpentine, methanol, and AXE Spray swilling arse, which you amusing consider fine spirits. The fine upstanding homos certainly don’t want riffraff like you guzzling their primo Bath Essence.

              If there’s one thing worse than a fag, it’s a cheap drunk. You probably think drinking all that ethylene glycol protected you from frostbite in Siberia, too… You’re worse than a huffer who lives on Exlax and Milk of Magnesia.

              1. Needs more prompting for prostate checks.

          2. Never was a big fan of liquor either. It all smells like paint thinner to me.

            Although, I had some moonshine once that was pretty good. The cinnamon covered up the alcohol taste.

            1. Speaker of huffers….*grins*

    1. Looks like Jeff Bezos got a chair with one of the legs cut an inch short. pushed way off to the side.

      re: dumping the press

      the White House Correspondents Association called the practice “unacceptable.”

      What would you have said if he showed up? “Trump makes disgusting, outrageous, offense statement about ______

    2. “…the White House Correspondents Association called the practice “unacceptable.”

      Unacceptable? Funny you should use that word in the same sentence with the word correspondents. Let’s talk about unacceptable.

      1. It’s weird how Trump doesn’t like the press. Nobody can explain that.

        1. They’ve done so much for him, and now look at how he treats them. Shameful.

    3. From the article:

      A club member tweeted a picture of the President-elect with himself at Trump National Golf Club in Jupiter, Florida, which alerted reporters to the President-elect’s visit.

      Better than video of Trump seemingly having a stroke and passing out into back of a van alerting the press pool.

      1. a picture of the President-elect with himself

        Trump’s ego is so yuuuge he poses for pictures with himself.

        *A club member tweeted a picture of himself with the President-elect

        ftfyColumbiaJournalismStylee

    4. The sidebar also links to this hyperventilating piece.

      1. Everything about that article is embarrassing.

        1. Including “and” and “the”.

        2. Especially the author’s oh-so-punchable face.

    5. It’s unacceptable! And if he doesn’t stop it, they are going to whine and stomp and throw things!

  54. What is food policy and why should I care? Why do we need food lawyers? Can food be a plaintiff, defendant or both? Can food run afoul of a criminal statute and be prosecuted by the local state’s attorney or federal prosecutor? If the food is indigent will a lawyer be appointed by the court to represent it’s interests? Beyond it’s nutritive value, does food possess assets that can be liquidated in the event of a judgement or conviction?
    I have a pretty simple food policy. I get hungry. I eat it. Next day, same thing. Works out well for me and I’ve never felt the need for legal advice to navigate the tricky business of feeding myself or my family. So my new year’s message to all food regulators and all of the rent seeking top men listed above is: fuck off slavers.

  55. Happy New Year – you magnificent bastards! (and bitches!)

    btw, I never read your book. I’m just making this up as I go along.

  56. GamerGate critic Brianna Wu to run for Congress

    Now you can become famous if enough people say mean things to you on the internet.

    1. if only xe gets as many votes as fake-death-threats, xe will do swimmingly.

      re:

      “If you look at what our Congress is doing for tech, it’s failing. It’s putting all of us in danger,”

      what is that even supposed to mean? progressive-feels-politics relies entirely on this sort of empty, important-sounding blather. “Congress needs to be *doing* stuff. Because DANGER.”

      “I’m not going to feel good about making games for the next four years with Donald Trump in the White House,” Wu said. “I wouldn’t feel good about making things to distract us when so many terrible things are going on.”

      Because your games sell so well that they distract millions. uh huh. Christ on a cross.

      Despite being in operation for close to seven years, it has created only one title – Revolution 60. The company is a bizarre one, essentially operated by just two people (Brianna Wu and her husband, Frank Wu); while the company had multiple employees at one point, most quit after the IOS version of Revolution 60 was created back in 2014. Amanda Warner, once the company’s co-financier, left the company in early 2016, leaving Frank and Brianna as the only current employees.

      also noted = non-sequitur shot @ Brietbart, “right wing outlet known for incendiary content”

      Sure. How should CNN be described?

      1. How should CNN be described?

        Cheerleaders for WW3?

        1. FAKE NEWS

      2. And getting wrong what “GamerGate” [sic] was about.

        1. it was about harassment and hating women, duh

        2. their characterization is like saying “watergate was about vindictive government leakers”

    2. I fucking dare her, no, I TRIPLE DOG DARE her to go to Steam and post something. It will be like being in shark infested waters while pouring out a barrel of chicken blood. Do NOT fuck with gamers, bitch, you’ve been warned.

    3. According to She Should Run, an online incubator for women to prepare for civic leadership roles, at least 4,500 women signed up to run for office through its website since the election.

      Frank Herbert foretold of the Axotl Tanks; I didn’t think they would manifest quite this way. Ronal’d Bejlij’s gholas hardest hit…

      1. HTML TAG FAIL!

        AHEM! Perhaps I should have been dipping into the Akvaveet after all…

        According to She Should Run, an online incubator for women to prepare for civic leadership roles, at least 4,500 women signed up to run for office through its website since the election.

        Frank Herbert foretold of the Axotl Tanks; I didn’t think they would manifest quite this way. Ronal’d Bejlij’s gholas hardest hit…

      2. Not axlolt tanks – Fish Speakers.

        1. Good lord! It’s even worse than I thought, as the only thing to keep Fish Speakers in line is a big, orange, cinnamon scented God Emperor, and a dude replicated so many times, he finally got in touch with his feminine side.

          Boy, I hope the state of Idaho knows about this….

          1. Duncan Donuts hardest hit, more at 11.

  57. Trump Derangement Syndrome is causing some people to misquote Mencken.

    When a candidate for public office faces the voters he does not face men of sense; he faces a mob of men whose chief distinguishing mark is the fact that they are quite incapable of weighing ideas, or even of comprehending any save the most elemental…

    So confronted, the candidate must either bark with the pack, or count himself lost. His one aim is to disarm suspicion, to arouse confidence in his orthodoxy, to avoid challenge. …

    All the odds are on the man who is, intrinsically, the most devious and mediocre ? the man who can most easily adeptly disperse the notion that his mind is a virtual vacuum.

    The Presidency tends, year by year, to go to such men.

    As democracy is perfected, the office represents, more and more closely, the inner soul of the people.

    We move toward a lofty ideal.

    On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart’s desire at last, and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.

    1. Would that not mean that if Clinton had won she would have been obviously the wrong candidate to vote for?

      Is this person trying to say that Trump, by virtue of #Winning, has shown himself to be vacuous? But Clinton, through her multi-decade long political career, is somehow *not*?

    2. I am pretty darn sure Mencken would have chosen Trump over Hillary.

    3. Jesus, people, you can’t improve upon Mencken. This is shameful.

  58. All the well-wishing and OT aside, I’d like to thank Linnekin for covering a boring and unsexy policy niche and doing it with gusto. On any other day this article would get 10, 20 comments while the drug war nutpunches and latest culture war salvos rack up thousands of clicks and comments and tweets. I have to admit I’m not always fascinated by food policy, but I appreciate that there’s somebody there in the trenches putting in the work to keep me informed and tell me the implications from a libertarian perspective. Good on ya Mr. Linnekin. Keep up the good work and Happy New Year.

  59. Ok. Started out with the cachaca. I’ve never really been a rum sort of guy. I don’t know what it is, the stuff makes me feel sort of numb instead of that nice warm and happy feeling I get with vodka or gin. So one double shot of rum and I switched to margaritas, 1800 Silver. I don’t have any triple sec, so I’m just using lime juice and a little juice of orange. It’s not bad. Been cooking and making salsa and other stuff for the last few hours. Wife made some vinaigrette and quail eggs, yummy, and now she’s doing something with some big shrimp I just bought from the local Asian market. When I was in there, a guy was walking past with a big fish and I said ‘hey, what is that?’. In broken English he said ‘snakehead, too good, you cook like this …. *I didn’t get any of it*’. So I decided I wanted one. They’re in the rivers here now. The gunpowder I know for sure, but the guy was telling about another river they’re in, I just couldn’t understand him. Anyway, my wife had already bought 2 red snappers, some cod, perch, a rockfish, and something else, and told me we don’t have room for it in the freezer right now. Anyway, next time, snakehead fry!

    1. Cachaca, brown sugar, lime, ice (if you want)

      Peel and slice up lime
      Crush lime pieces, brown sugar, and ice in tumbler
      Pour over cachaca to taste.

      1. I have all of those ingredients. Hadn’t thought about the brown sugar. I think it was the 2nd time I was in Brazil, a female friend of ours bought me a cachaca from the bar we were at because I’d never had one before. Tall glass with just sliced up limes in a clear liquor, which was the cachaca. I took a drink. Holy fucking shit, pure cachaca. I was like whoa fuck, this is pure alcohol. I had been drinking beer all day since about 10am that morning. She said ‘shut up and drink it like a man’. Ok, what the fuck, lol.

    2. I’ve been cutting eggnog with pit? for the last month for lack of ideas of what to do with it during cold weather.

      1. I still have part of a bottle of this, about the best cachaca I’ve had so far. Still not a big fan of rum, but this stuff is smooth, I drink it straight.

        Pitu Vitoriosa

        1. Looks like the Courvoisier of cacha?a, based on packaging design.

          1. It’s smooth as the smoothest sipping bourbon. My son-in-law and some of his friends are connoisseurs of fine liquors and typically buy cases to get discounts. I got this as a gift. The bottle is beautiful, very thick heavy bottle. On the reverse side, there’s an etched in the glass sugar cane plant. I tried to find an image of it, but can’t find one.

      2. I’ve not had Pitu but will definitely be looking for it.

  60. Army warns of new threat: Energy drinks

    “Our Red Army now needs IL-2 aircraft Rip Its like the air it breathes, like the bread it eats.”

    -Stalin, if energy drinks had been around back then.

    1. Don’t we put our pilots on amphetamines? If it’s good enough for the fly boys…

        1. They were still using them as of Iraq/Afghanistan as well – I doubt they’ve stopped.

      1. Anything like that back then was far superior to anything you can legally buy today. Hell, even ephedrine is far superior to to any energy drink bullshit. I can drink 3 of those things and go to sleep in 5 minutes.

      2. Amphetamines are a relatively clean stimulant, especially mixed amphetamine salts.

        Some of the shit in energy drinks can cause panic attacks in large doses.

        Make of that what you will.

        1. I didn’t mean to imply one was better than the other, more that it’s retarded to give pilots stimulants because of the intensity of their missions and then deny them to ground troops who are probably under just as much pressure then crap your pants because they’re using caffeine instead.

          1. One IS better than the other. But prohibition means we’re causing panic attacks in guys with machine guns.

    2. Energy drinks taste terrible. Rip Its are the only ones I’ve encountered that I didn’t instantly want to spit out. Though it never really picked me up, either.

      1. I cut Rockstar with fruit juice. Heavily. If I drink more than a third of a can in a day, I feel like I’m having a heart attack.

  61. This is the lamest last thread ever.

    1. straffinrun promised a play by play on hot mother in law action earlier.

      1. Failed. But I gave it a shot. Happy New Years, Almighty!

          1. “She thinks her advice is a contribution”

            Puuuuurfect.

        1. You tried. That’s what’s important. Happy New Years!

        2. You may have dodged a metaphorical bullet with that one, have a happy Feast of the Circumcision!

    2. This is the lamest last threadchat room ever.

  62. Merry New Year to all my Reason friends & fellow travelers. Except for the Muslims, Jews, Chinese, and anybody else that doesn’t use the western calendar.

    If you were real atheists, you wouldn’t be using a Christ-centric calendar, either.

    1. Calander is Pagen

      1. Colander is Holey

        1. Evander Holyfield

      2. Calander…

        You made a major spelling blunder, that negates the veracity of your entire post!

        #rulesoftheinternet

        1. Perhaps instead of calendar, I should have said, “year numbering system”. Which is Christ-centric.

          1. Good as place to start zero as any. Why would I care?

              1. Ted S.,

                This song is one of those that I was reminded of.

                  1. Ted S.,

                    I did not think of those two songs, nor did I think of this song .

          2. There are non-Christ-centric year numbering systems. Even ones still in use like the Hebrew calendar.

    2. Didn’t they try that in the French Revolution? Along with Metric time.

      But still, that’s why atheists use BCE and CE because AD and BC are too religious.

    3. If you were real atheists, you wouldn’t be using a Christ-centric calendar, either.

      Did I see what you did, Gogira, by starting with ” Merry New Year to all my Reason friends & fellow travelers.” or did we not?

  63. Someone shot up a nightclub in Istanbul. CNN says

    An Istanbul nightclub was attacked Sunday morning, killing 35 people and wounding 40 others, according to Istanbul governor Vasip Sahin. Sahin called the incident “a terror attack” targeting innocent people who were at the club to celebrate the new year.

    1. Just saw that. Some reports had the attackers dressed as Santa Claus

        1. That would have been Ded Moroz & Snegurochka, then.

          FAKE! Nooze.

          *We have the twins dressed up as toddler Snegurochki.

          1. I forgot to mention yesterday that your Belarusian Father Christmas URL is inaccessible/ rejected, but the ??????? costumes read loud and clear Roger Alpha Tango over.

      1. There are Turkish police dressed as Santa roaming around Istanbul. Maybe that’s where they got the idea.

    2. I guess that’s the blowback Erdogan deserves for so vigorously prosecuting the war on terror, hurr hurr durr.

      1. I guess that’s the blowback Sperogan deserves for so vigorously prosecuting the war on terror, hurr hurr durr.

  64. Germany banned version of Qur’an as “extremist,” but afraid to dispose of copies

    But the ban does not solve the dilemma of how to properly get rid of thousands of books which contain Islam’s holy scripture. According to WDR, the government of North Rhine-Westphalia has been in contact with Muslim leaders and experts in Islamic studies for a method of disposal that does not involve burning, shredding, or recycling the paper.

    The traditional way to dispose of an old or desecrated Koran is to wrap it in a cloth and bury it, preferably somewhere hallowed and nowhere a person may accidentally walk over it. While some scholars say dropping it into flowing water or burning it is acceptable when burial is impossible, the first option presents logistical and environmental dilemmas while the latter evokes unsavory historical connotations?.

    1. It’s a country of rocket scientists, for Christ’s sake. Blast them into space. Otherwise, shut up, bend over, and accept anal-and-vaginal-shredding-Allah over frog-boiling-Gaia.

      Environmental dilemmas my ass…. More like False Dilemmas.

        1. Please, tell me less, Mr. Easterly. *grins* Happy New Year!

    2. I have a better idea. Ban Angela Merkel.

      1. In a rocket, no less.

        “TO THE MOON, ANGELA! TO THE MOON!”

        1. First woman on moon, glass ceiling finally shattered.

          1. I’m guessing she wouldn’t want Germans to vote on that idea right now.

    3. While some scholars say dropping it into flowing water or burning it is acceptable when burial is impossible, the first option presents logistical and environmental dilemmas while the latter evokes unsavory historical connotations?.

      Millions of people have a big bowl-like device in the bathroom where there’s flowing water when you push down a little handle on the water tank – and those handle some nasty crap. I don’t see where it would be any big environmental dilemma to dispose of Korans there.

      BTW, fingers crossed for the ghost of Woody Hayes to clothesline a Clemson linebacker here.

      1. Was I just imaging the 4 Noah Brown TD catches against tight coverage against Oklahoma? Where did that offense go? I have to wonder if Barrett is just too scared to throw a pic? Dropped passes sure aren’t helping.

        1. Imagining

    4. “Emblazoned with the word “Lies!” which translates to “Read!” or “Read It,” the books were removed from circulation for “spreading messages of hate and anti-constitutional ideologies,” in the words of Interior Minister Thomas de Maiziere.

      “De Maiziere has further said that more than 100 young men traveled from Germany to Iraq and Syria to join the so-called “Islamic State” (IS) terrorists after being exposed to the book’s strict, draconian interpretation of Islam and Islamic law. Along with the book, the “True Religion” group that distributed it has also been banned for promoting hate.”

      Anti-constitutional ideologies? Like book-banning?

      Say what you will of America’s naive First Amendment, at least it doesn’t put the government in the position of worrying how to dispose of religious books it just banned.

      1. “naive First Amendment” = /sarc, based on comments from Europeans about how America is some cowboy culture where you can just say anything at all and not get banned.

        1. I meant it *is* sarcasm.

          Shucks.

          1. I’m sorry cowboy, but in polite society we don’t use words like shucks

  65. Hello everybody. Happy new years Eve. May your booze never run empty.

      1. Lucky for you, the booze stores are still open!

  66. Turned on the TV to watch the ekiden marathon (kind of) this morning. First thing the father says? “It’s all black guys. That’s meaningless.”

        1. 65 year old Asian woman. Cmon, how hard is that to imagine?

          1. Pearl Cream is the secret of the orient. And a hell of a euphemism.

      1. straffinrun,

        Not only am I glad that you are capable of typing coherent sentences, I am glad that you are not entirely like many of the individuals I have met.

        1. Not so bad this morning. Sake hangovers aren’t that bad. As for the MIL, there’s always next year.

          1. straffinrun,

            Might I offer these ideas – if appropriate – for you to remember (and/or somehow save them for future reference)?

            This is her daughter. Many mothers want what’s best for their children.

            This is her daughter.

            1. They are awesome in laws. I couldn’t have gotten luckier.

              1. Don’t you mean “ruckier”?

              2. straffinrun,

                A few of us, across time, have acknowledged what you have written here.

                Perhaps you may express your sentiments.

                They are awesome in laws. I couldn’t have gotten luckier.

                1. I like my in laws! Good people. Many foreigners here have icy, at best, relationships with their Japanese in laws. That’s what I mean by “I’m lucky”.

            2. This is her daughter. Many mothers want what’s best for their children.

              +1 Joan Crawford as Mildred Pierce, but -1 real-life Joan Crawford.

  67. Chinese immigrants in America are eager to exercise an unfamiliar right: gun ownership

    Tony Gao emerges from a gun store in City of Industry, Calif., with something he could have never gotten in his native China: a handgun license.

    He passed the firearm safety test on his third try ? he says the store’s Chinese translation of the test is a little off ? but still, he’s a little nervous.

    “Are you sure police won’t try to get me?” Gao, 58, asks.

    Private gun ownership is generally banned in China. So when Chinese immigrants arrive in the U.S., many are curious about owning firearms. […]

    On a recent weekday, a line formed at a bilingual English and Chinese sign-in sheet as Tom Petty crooned over the store speakers. A few customers puzzled over a Chinese translation of the handgun test beneath an empty wall where the store once displayed assault weapons ? all of which were snapped up before California’s tough new gun control measures take effect Jan. 1. The legislation was signed by Gov. Jerry Brown in July in the wake of simmering outrage over mass shootings in San Bernardino and Orlando, Fla.

    1. So now the Chinaman is stealing our guns as well as our jobs?

    2. The Chinks gots themselves lot’s of off the books guns though.

      Years ago I read an article about feuding villages where they had all manner of improvised bang-sticks. Pipe shotguns, single-shot black powder pistols, double-barrels attached to lumber and so forth.

      And I read an account that back during their Cultural Revolution some college students had outfitted a van with a black powder cannon. No further details were given so I don’t know how effective it was.

      Though it would be cool if they had like four with two firing ports on each side of the van and they met a similarly equipped gov’t van…

      1. improvised firearms are a national tradition in China:

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CO9VAQR-X2Q

        1. Those guys know how to get the most out of their tubes.

    3. “Are you sure police won’t try to get me?” Gao, 58, asks.

      Not yet, but being California it’s only a matter of time.

    4. A freshly naturalized mainland Chinese guy joined my club and at initiation every present member was extremely excited about his interest and eventual membership. Racist gun nuts all.

      1. Further proof of the so-called Asianphilic “Yellow Fevered,” alt-right “racists” I have been hearing much about lately.

        LEGIT! Nooze.

      2. There was a Chinese guy in my platoon during basic training. He was hardcore. He broke a rib halfway through, but kept going because he wanted to graduate on time. Eventually, the pain was too much, and he went to the clinic.

        He got caught sitting on his bunk, which is a no-no, so the the drill sgt told him to bring his bunk down 2 flights of stairs in front of CQ. We helped him disassemble and carry it, but he had to carry it by himself out of the stairwell. The pain from having to do that is what made him go to the clinic.

          1. No, he got recycled to another class. He probably graduated with them.

  68. Happy New Year except for everyone in this thread! Oh and those not in this thread!

    Oh, and drink up fuckers! Be safe, remember it is amateur night!!

    1. “amateur night”. Lol, i like that.

      1. Never heard that before, DenverJ? Aside from coppers, professional drinkers & hard core partiers, EMS, and ER/EDs all refer to New Year’s Eve as, “Amateur Night,” in my experience.

        Interestingly, in UKR, drink driving is very much socially discouraged even beyond what the law pre- and proscribes. It’s honestly not uncommon for extremely drunk bar partrons to have their keys (if they are driving or riding a motorised vehicle) involuntarily taken by barkeeps, bouncers, and, if necessary, other patrons. Dr. ZG and me have been witnessed to more than a couple of guys (even a gal or two) get the crap kicked out of them for repeatedly attempting to drive whilst inebriated and not accepting a third party ride (taxi, Uber, Good Samaritan, etc).

        If coppers are summoned or are in the area, they simply shrug and thank the patrons for doing so, then go their way. Nobody here in Odessa wants compromised drivers (especially since drivers here are absolutely insane as it is), and driving whilst intox’d is something even UKR and Russkij pol’icejskij will not turn a blind eye towards, nor accept a bribe “to forget about it”.

        1. They are pros when it comes to drinking I suppose. Drunk driving anywhere these days is just plain stupid.

          1. I use the term, “professional drinker,” with a hint of scorn, since what I really mean is, “functional alcoholic.”

            1. I don’t abuse alcohol; I have a rapport with it!

            2. My was a substance abuse counselor for 30 years. The dinner table stories she told…*shudders*. We’re talking dog fucking and shit like that.

                1. I have absolutely doubt none of your mother’s clinical case HXs, straffin-san. To be honest, at one time, I did seriously argue once on this here very boards; I believe TAO (The Angry optimist, Aka Randian) was arguing that drink driving shouldn’t be a crime, and at the time, I agreed, regardless of some the accident aftermaths I have seen….

                  Until one of my best friends from undergrad appeared at our ER, a few months after that thread, actually. On my table. And was almost totally unrecognisable. She was the sober one. She died three days later. Having to tell her family damn near killed me.

                  No more.

                  1. The random DUI check points are BS, but if the cops catch you in a legit manner…Yeah, I don’t have much sympathy.

                  2. No more.

                    My thought recently has been a “disproportionate punishment” regime for all sorts of reckless driving. Whether it’s DUI or distracted driving, make the punishment for reckless driving so severe that it alters the idiot’s life when they get caught. I’m thinking something like: 1st offense – $1000 fine, 2nd offense – 60 day jail, $10k fine, 1 year license suspension, 3rd offense – 2 years jail, $25k fine, 5 year license suspension, 4th+ offense – charged as attempted reckless murder.

                    Driving like a dumbass is inexcusable whether drunk, distracted, or just a moron.

  69. I ate like a pound of refried beans (along with other stuff) for lunch so I’m bringing in the new year with some strong, strong farts!

    My goodness, they’re horrible! And I’ve yet to get my drink on.

    Wish you were here!

    1. No need to brag. I have champagne farts. Very high pressure, but all bark and no bite.

    2. OH MY GOD! Something just rolled out of me that sounded like a thunderhead and smells like Winston’s mom a week after the fleet came into port.

    3. We had cabbage-filled enchiladas. Gooooood times, Terrance!

  70. R.I.P Father Mulcahy!

    1. DAMN YOU 2016!!!!!

      (in all seriousness, I find the whole “2016 is the worst year ever” bullshit to be hilarious. It’s like a second wave of salty prog tears combined with their “I want to pretend I’m cool by knowing all these obscure former pop icons” salty hipster tears)

    2. Dead in December, all at age 84:

      William Christopher
      Debbie Reynolds
      Inventor of the solo cup

      Coincidence?

    1. If that OSU kicker had only made his field goal attempts, this would have been a different game.

        1. Something sure got tOS’ed.

    2. What a fucking embarrassment. I knew they had O-line issues and I knew that JT Barrett had issues in big-time games, but gah. The B1G looks horrible this bowl season.

      1. What a complete waste of time

        1. The best part of this, aside from the win, is all the idiot South Carolina fans who hopped on the Ohio State bandwagon.

      2. The B1G looks horrible this bowl season.

        Yes, 2-5 so far, but the two wins were impressive underdog showings by Minny and my beloved (both my wife and I are alumni, though we met many years after we were each there) Northwestern Wildcats. Except for this dOSU embarrassment and Nebraska losing solidly to Tennessee, the other games were all very close, with 6-6 perennial doormat Indiana almost knocking off bowl juggernaut #19 Utah.

        Three games on Jan 2, all winnable, and the conference could end up 5-5 in bowls if they all come through. It will be tough, as in two of these their opponents (USC and Florida) are essentially playing home games.

        Big Ten teams almost always have to travel to the other teams’ regions for bowls. I’d love to see how some of these warm-weather teams would do playing in Big Ten country this time of year. Would Alabama or Clemson do as well playing dOSU in Columbus in January?

        1. I’d love to see how some of these warm-weather teams would do playing in Big Ten country this time of year.

          Surprisingly better than you’d think. The cold isn’t what gets them, it’s the cold grass. With artificial turf replacing grass almost everywhere, the “3 yards and a cloud of dust” mentality that ruled the B1G for 100 years is outmoded, even in the cold. I’m a big fan of going back to natural grass, it slows the game down (reduces injuries) and benefits defense and power over track athlete WRs and RBs.

      3. Random CFB observation: So many teams are filled with players who are “sore winners.” It’s one thing to celebrate, but they’re flat out trailer trash with cheap shots and taunting once the game is won. Especially egregious was the end of the Alabama game. Nothing gets me rooting against a team faster than when they’re classless winners.

    3. The one true OSU.

      1. “Mediocre State University”

        1. Took the same boards as a Harvard Med Grad, just like *cough* Jill Stein *cough* and bunch of other overedjumacated nutbars. Besides, one only get out of education what one is willing to put into it, regardless of school. And their Petroleum, Chemical, and Industrial Engineering depts are top shelf, TYM.

          *Notes this on Playa’s chart*

          1. I got a front row seat to the greatest freak show on earth, and it was only $4200 a year.

    4. ACC ACC ACC ACC!!!

      1. NO!
        *swats nose with newspaper*

        The SEC is bad and I won’t have you learning their bad habits!

        1. The SEC reaps what they sow.

          1. Sometimes I wonder whether we’re going to start hearing allegations coming out about Bama in the next few years. Nobody is this good for this long without a lot of “help.” (see USC ca. 2004)

  71. Happy New Year, cocksuckers. I hope to experience the same number of yucks in 2017 from you misanthropic cunts.

  72. Who’s up for an end of year derp montage?

    California Teachers Union explains economics
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZOegA8MgC2o

    ATF seizes toy guns; claims they can be converted
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y2sWiZ8BizI

    1. I really, really want to see that ATF goon explain how to convert an airsoft gun into a real machine gun. That would make for a great video.

      1. You are doing violence to me with your whiteness.

    2. The most passionate GOP speech of the century
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GhqQU3dVEPw

      Nancy Pelosi explains why it’s OK for her to pay her interns less than the minimum wage
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GhqQU3dVEPw

  73. I just read a book about Stockholm Syndrome. It was pretty bad at first, but, by the end, I liked it.

    1. So, like the opposite of your joke?

    2. Too bad it was Stocking, not Stockholm Syndrome. At least you’re supported where it’s most needed.

      1. Sexually submissive is considered a form of masochism? Why?

        1. If you aren’t topping you are just a bottom, bro.

  74. ‘Sup, sluts?

    1. Other than Charles white knighting for my mother in law? Not much. Stomach is churning so by all means feel free to post something vile.

      1. I recommend shouting “Where are the Wookie bitches!” at top volume.

    2. I thought about translating your work into various languages. It would have a demoralizing effect on America’s enemies.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ienp4J3pW7U

      1. I always thought that the delicate tones of German would really enhance my stories.

        1. I’m hoping it would work out more like that South Park episode where they tried to write the most offensive novel ever.
          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DQjEK4xZkSo

          The US introduced ipecac into Japanese water supplies during WW2 to cause mass vomiting and thus paralyze their defenses.

        2. As a matter of fact, Saccharin Man, I did just that for Dr. ZG. I put a couple of your more recent ditties into the onlajn perovodchik (machine translation) and emailed it to her during the workday.

          Her answer (approx translation):

          HORROR! WHY ARE YOU SENDING ME THIS GARBAGE!!!! This AWFUL! It makes no sense and tries to be shocking and disgusting! You wasted my valuable time with this? You did not even translate it yourself, but use machine. Terrible. And lazy. Translate this better, and if you send *censored* like this to me again, you sleep on sofa. UNDERSTOOD!?

          I got help translating from one of the Medical Guides here, and the response, with corrections, (as best as she could do):

          Dr. Maximus, did you write this yourself? If so, I never want to deal with you in public again unless absolutely necessary. If you are trying to write like Bulgakov, stop now. Please. And don’t send me filth like this to translate ever again.

          After the corrections, Dr. ZG actually liked it, for the most part. “I understand now. Still very strange. You say his is college librarian? No wonder USA scores low on tests…”

          True story.

          1. Machine translation hit the big time during the Cold War. Supposedly, when they were testing one machine translator they gave it the English phrase “out of sight, out of mind”, translated it into Russian then translated it back into English. The result was “invisible insanity”. The phrase “the spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak” came back as “the meat is good but the vodka stinks.”

            1. Yeah, I’ve heard that anecdote before. What makes the Medical Guide part amusing, is I tried to translate by hand Saccharin Man’s….odd metaphors and phraseology, like, “pleasure raisin,”….and still keep the sense of what mental image he was trying to put into people’s minds, and I was pretty close (I forget what is was, ATM).

              I included copypastas of the original “Hat & Hair” material (I asked her if she wanted a link to the entire source, and she immediately refused. She was really offended. *chuckles*) for comparative analysis. She was only cool with it *after* I assured her I did not pen the work.

          2. Dr. Maximus, did you write this yourself? If so, I never want to deal with you in public again unless absolutely necessary.

            Thread winner. It’s good to know that SugarFree gets the intended result no matter where he gets read.

            Hilarious stories. I admire your intestinal fortitude to share this with your wife and others.

            Coincidentally, I was just trying to explain to my wife why I like reading and posting on this board, and it was mostly met with blank stares from her, the spousal equivalent of “that’s nice, hon. Now let’s talk about things I’m interested in, your 45 seconds are up.”

            1. My wife was reading over my shoulder the other day, and she responded to me with “those people are absolutely horrible!”

              1. She’s never seen me naked.

                1. Should I tell her that you post naked? Perhaps that will whet her interest.

            2. Same here C.

              Sometimes if I translate material here from cynicalasshole to english she will get it. I have gotten more than a few laughs out of her that way.

          3. I’m glad that my intentions bridge cultures.

          4. I loled. I like the idea of SF destroying relationships on the other side of the world, on autopilot.

    1. Does Kathleen Hanna have hipster progeria?

        1. and this song that was wrongly attributed to her. To be fair, she did coin “Kurt Smells Like Teen Spirit”

  75. Just popped the bubbly an hour and a half early. The wife fell asleep an hour ago, and I’m prolly not gonna make it to midnight either. I remember when midnight was the start of the party. Now I’m struggling to stay awake past 10:30.

    1. Go to bed early.
      Don’t leave the house.
      Don’t go to the party.

      Childhood punishments are adult goals.

    2. YOU”RE OOOOLD! Sheesh I’ve been up all night with my family here *and* you fine, fine reprobates. Even with President Poroshenko droning on in the background.

      Though I will be taking a nap shortly, actually. Been up for a little over 24 hrs. And I’m older than you, I’ll wager. SAD!

      1. Been up for a little over 24 hrs. And I’m older than you, I’ll wager.

        I enjoy sleep too much for that.

        I’m sure some friends had a party or something, but the wife can’t drink (pregnant), so parties suck for us. I’m too introverted to like them, and she’s too sober to enjoy them.

    3. Less than a year ago my wife and I attended an informal get-together with her former colleagues. After a drink or two, some finger food and a few laughs most people said their goodbyes and left. An hour or so later everyone else began doing the same. One of them motioned around the room and said “Well, I guess we all know who the hard core partiers are now!”

      I made a show of looking at my watch and announced “It is seven-thirty.”

      1. I guess I’m an old fart, but unless a random collections of people hang out around the bathroom for a vaguely-ill defined reason, it’s not really a party.

    4. Around 10:30 PM I turned on the DVR and watched The Secret Land, a documentary about Operation Highjump, the US Navy’s expedition to Antarctica a few years after World War II. Interesting, but of course there’s a fair amount of propaganda about American can-do.

  76. Great moments in wussery: Sanders supporter recounts harrowing ordeal of speaking with Republicans

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CoAmll3ViQA

    1. I have to wonder how these people don’t end up committing suicide. If the slightest amount of adversity turns them into mewling children, what happens when they lose their job or have an unexpected car repair?

    2. I guess it never occurred to this snowflake that those mean people might have been pissed because she choose to invade THEIR safe spaces ( their privacy at home) with her Bernie bullshit without being invited in ?

  77. Happy New Year you lovable low-lifes!

      1. New Year was on Dec 21. The sacrificed virgin was to die for.

    1. And I can keep my cock?

      Ahh, I love Crowder.

  78. Happy New Year commentariat!!?!!!!!!
    Whoooool!!!!!!!!

    1. Aye – it’s late (EST) and I’m probably drunker than I feel (i.e., it’s gonna hurt tomorrow). Here’s to 2017 being less worse than we fear.

    2. Fuck off.

  79. Lena Dunham, rapping about Hillary Clinton

    https://youtu.be/H51HuNX41Fg?t=1m8s

    Some things are even more depraved than Sugarfree.

    1. At least SugarFree is erotic.

      1. Emetic, maybe.

  80. Is this thread still alive at 11:40 PST? Could this be the one night of the year where there’s actually some late night chatter, lol?

    1. Nope. Like always, wait until 4am Eastern time for posting to resume.

      1. Le sigh. Happy New Year!

    2. PST? Get out of here with that bullshit. EST rules.

  81. Happy New Year everyone!

    I stayed in and went to bed early, thinking it would snow. It didn’t snow. At least I can get up early and watch the Vienna Philharmonic’s New Year’s Concert.

  82. Happy New Year ya filthy, spittle-flecked anarcho-frankentrumpkensteins!

  83. This morning my niece is trying to find her phone charger and we’re foaming at the mouth about how there’s 5 phones in the house and none of them use the same plug and why can’t they use one plug? When you buy a new TV or toaster or radio you don’t have to install new outlets in your house that the plug will fit, do you? It’s not like when you buy a lamp, you have to buy special lightbulbs that will fit only that la…….

    Oh, wait. Thanks to the government and their “efficiency” standards that save you approximately negative 48 dollars a year on your electric bill because the bulbs cost 9 fucking dollars apiece, we now have fluorescent and CFL and LED and halogen lamps that some use bayonet plugs and some a side-mount plug and some a candelabra base and some you have to use mini bulbs in and some use the standard base and now we gotta keep 5 goddamn kinds of lightbulbs in the house and spend more money on them and for what? Plus you gotta figure in the cost of the hospital visit when you stroke out over the whole incandescents are literally worse than Hitler issue and you realize there’s a shitload of highly-paid government bureaucrats with nothing better to do than sit around and think up a set of encyclopedias that detail how to change a goddamn lightbulb.

    Why is the left side of my body suddenly paralyzed?

    1. Why is the left side of my body suddenly paralyzed?

      That’s just the tranquilizer dart taking effect. Don’t worry, when we see you again you’ll also love Big Brother.

    2. I was just cussing Obamabulbs this morning. I could hang an elf from the ceiling and have him continuously light his farts and have more light than those fucking things make.

      1. Obamabulbs

        That’s strange, I didn’t realize that Obama was somehow retroactively responsible for the signing of the Energy Independence and Security Act of… 2007.

        Passed the House on January 18, 2007 (264-163) … Passed the Senate on June 21, 2007 (65-27) … Signed on December 19, 2007 by President Bush …

          1. W was literally worse than Hitler.

            1. Heh, I’m just saying give “credit” where “credit” is due!

              1. Oh I know. I was just playing on the fact that W was portrayed as some kind of ultra-right monster when in fact we got stuff like that.

                1. Heh, indeed. We’re supposed to believe that Team Red is sincere about their rhetoric, but in practice both parties are the party of crony socialism.

    3. I believe phone companies will have to use micro-USB chargers in the near future. These are also the perfect place to install some government backdoors into your phone. “Mr. Podesta, do you trust this charger to charge your phone, even if it will access your phone’s file system?”

    4. This is why getting rid of USB will require an act of Congress.

      1. Also, Dabo is a heck of a football coach.

    1. OSU did not deserve to be in the playoff. As it turns out, Michigan probably didn’t either, but that’s another story.

      Methinks the B1G was more than a little bit overrated this year.

      1. The only thing that would make it better would be a Western Michigan win tomorrow. I live in flyover country and I’m sick of hearing the ‘Big 10 is great’ monotony.

        Yes, the old alma mater’s football team was extremely mediocre this year.

        Schadenfreude, it’s not just for November anymore.

  84. Lifting challenge from reddit’s r/weightroom

    Donut Squat

    Perform a 1xBodyweight barbell squat to or below parallel. Parallell is defined as the crease of the hip being in line with the top of the knee joint. At the bottom of the squat, pause and begin eating donuts. Once you can eat no more donuts, finish the squat and re-rack the bar.

    Whoever manages to consume the most donuts win. For a donut to count the entire pastry must be consumed, although missing crumbles are allowed. You may use any method of transporting the donuts into your mouth, such as picking them up from the floor, eating off a small table, or slave labor.

    In the event of a draw, whoever manages to eat their donuts quicker is the winner, timed from when the lifter starts descending to when they are standing upright again.

    1. Yikes.

      For a less miserable way to be amused stab yourself in the eye with a rusty screwdriver.

  85. 2017 has been the worst year ever.

    🙁

    1. I had short ribs for breakfast. Excellent year so far.

  86. What’s the betting line on who gets the first post of 2017 and what the subject matter will be they’ll be slagging Trump about?

    1. IOW – who on staff is most likely to be sober and willing to whip up something to throw online today? Or really, really drunk and willing to whip up something to throw online today?

    2. Nah, Reasonoids are sleeping off their cosmos all day. This is just going to turn into a 1200+ post shitshow of us complaining about the lack of a new post.

      1. It’s only a shitshow if the trolls show up. Until then, it’s just fun.

      2. There was a post at 7:00 am on 1/1/2016, and a “real” post at 8:38 am. Letting up on the staff beatings was clearly a mistake. (“those euphemisms, etc. etc.”)

        1. We didn’t donate enough at the webathon, so they had to sell off some of their orphan slaves. That hurts the posting frequency.

    3. I think our Asian or Antipodian commenters snagged the first comments of the year. IFH? Straffin? I cant remember who it was.

  87. New Year’s resolutions are fake news.

    I doubt they really exist. I bet hardly anybody actually decides to change something about themselves because it’s a new year. New Year’s is an excuse to have a party and a day off of work.

    I’m somebody who doesn’t really have any vices. Women are an orientation, not a vice, right? . . . unless you order them online or something–and I don’t do that.

    So, I don’t have anything like that I want to change about myself. There are things I’d like to change about other people–but I don’t use a New Year or even an annual evaluation to accomplish that with people I’m responsible for (or to). Don’t tell me you’re not going to hit your due date on the due date . . . don’t tell me you called them but they never called back . . . or I’ll eat your brain.

    I’m not responsible for anybody here, but I’d like to see Robby and ENB make a New Year’s resolution to write with intellectual honesty; unfortunately, a) I’m not sure they understand what that is, really, and b) recent indications suggest they’ve resolved not to do that under any circumstances–at least not on purpose. I’d resolve not to read their articles, but I mostly come to read comments, and you bastards keep posting comments under their articles.

    It’s hard not to RTFA every once in a while.

    1. “I’m somebody who doesn’t really have any vices.”

      You are a blast at parties, aren’t you?

      1. His biggest vice: obliviousness.

    2. My resolution: I’m going to demand more of my deodorant

      (h/t Adam Carolla)

      1. My New Year’s resolution is to be less condescending to my intellectual inferiors. (“Condescending” means talking down to people as if they’re idiots.)

        1. I know what you’re saying, but what if they’re idiots?

          I usually only do that to people from whom I expect a lot more.

          Some of the smartest people I’ve known were uneducated, and some of the most educated people I’ve known were idiots.

          When I say that, “What progressives believe about how the economy works is dumber than creationism”, it isn’t necessarily a knock on creationists.

          Progressives who find creationism to be the epitome of uneducated stupidity need to feel the stupidity of their own ideas about the economy in their bones.

          1. “Some of the smartest people I’ve known were uneducated, and some of the most educated people I’ve known were idiots.”

            Bingo.

            Y’all shouldn’t give Ken so much grief. Everyone (except me) is wrong about something at one time or another. Ken is right more than he is wrong and now and then he really nails it.

        2. *narrows gheys*

        3. The best part is when you explain what condescending means.
          Great resolution!

          1. In all fairness, you have to admit that he made it over 12 hours into the new year before breaking his resolution.

          2. The best part is when you explain what condescending means.

            That wizzing sound is the joke going over your head.

            1. That wizzing sound is the joke going over your head.

              ???
              I think you may be a bit hung over, Slumbrew.

  88. Happy New Year, Reasonoids!

    Enjoy!

    (Props to Tickerguy.)

    1. Calvin was skillful at philosophically justifying his mischievousness.

  89. Where is my Trump already ruined 2017 article?

    1. Tomorrow, I’m sure of it.

  90. Only 364 days left!

  91. I heard something bad happened and it involved Donald Trump. WHY ISN’T REASON COVERING IT?

    1. You’re supposed to blame Trump for when good things happen, too–and make them look bad.

      If you weren’t a Trumpkin, you’d know that.

      P.S. Did you hear? So and so is being appointed to such and such. He’s slightly to the right of Hayek, and he has business relationships–so he’s an insufferable crony.

      1. We’re all Trumpkins now. I saw it on the front page of Time.

  92. I read a piece one time (elsewhere) about how Trump was dissolving his charitable foundation.

    After you read it, you’d have come away with the impression that Trump has so many crony business ties, there’s no way he could possibly be above the board in his decision making as President.

    I had to remind myself that the article was about how he’s dissolving his charitable foundation.

    It read like an indictment.

  93. “Mr. Atkins remains a critic of regulation, attacking Democrats he says believe they can direct the invisible hand of the market.

    His libertarian political views, combined with his technical grasp of securities laws, made him a fitting choice to head the part of Mr. Trump’s transition team responsible for digging into financial agencies. Mr. Atkins, 58 years old, is also a leading candidate for a top post in the Trump administration, either to run the SEC or to become the Federal Reserve’s point man on banking oversight.

    —-Wall Street Journal

    “How Trump’s Regulation Skeptic Helps Wall Street Navigate the Rules”

    http://tinyurl.com/halnxvy

    He’s the point guy on deregulating Wall Street.

    The rest of the article (google the title) reads like an indictment list of cronyisms–and that’s coming from the Wall Street Journal. It would be worse in the rest of the media.

    But if Rand Paul were President, he might appoint the same guy for perfectly libertarian reasons.

    If I were President, I suspect I’d want him in charge of the SEC.

    1. There seem to be three tribes in the Trump financial regulatory coalition: ideologues, Wall Streeters and populists.

      Atkins belongs to the first tribe. “I think of him as more libertarian than conservative,” says Simon Lorne, the former general counsel for the SEC, who worked with Atkins in the Clinton Administration.

      In testimony last year to the House Financial Services Committee, Atkins opened by approvingly quoting Friedrich Hayek, the Austrian economist and philosopher beloved by libertarians. Hayek, Atkins explained, identified the “fatal conceit”: the idea that “man is able to shape the world around him according to his wishes.”

      Governments, in Atkins’ view, share this hubristic notion. When they try to corral capital markets to prevent exploitative or risky behavior, they end up hurting the economy. Since the financial crisis, Atkins has been a part of the steady assault on Dodd Frank.

      WHYCOME U PUBLICAN TRUMP FAGGOTS SUKKIN HIS COK

      1. Make no mistake about it, the left leaning who call themselves libertarians are seriously butthurt that big-government pinko Clinton didn’t win. Johnson was just the curtain you weren’t supposed to look behind.

        1. i think accusing people (anyone) of being fake-libertarians is gay.

          1. If calling out AmSoc when he pulls his “original definition” of libertarian bullshit is gay, then call me Princess Nokia.

            1. ok you got me there

              also, as diplo says = everyone is a little gay

            2. That’s a little different.

              I don’t think you can call people out as non-libertarian because of where they land on any particular position.

              If you call them out as non-libertarian because of how they got there, that’s probably closer to the mark.

              A social conservative isn’t a libertarian because he supports the Second Amendment.

              I progressive isn’t a libertarian because she’s against the Iraq War.

              I’m not sure you can get to opposing the Second Amendment from a libertarian perspective, but you can legitimately oppose abortion from a libertarian perspective. You can oppose the Iraq War from a libertarian or a communist perspective, too.

              It isn’t where you land on the issues. It’s how you get there.

              That’s usually my gripe with Robby and ENB. They don’t understand that, and the way they get there is often not libertarian. Two weeks ago, I asked Robby how anyone could know whether his article was pro-free speech or anti-free speech, and he responded, basically, by saying that you could tell because it was written for a libertarian website.

              http://tinyurl.com/j7u6l7d

              That isn’t libertarian thinking. That violates three or four basic tenets of libertarian thinking.

              Whatever you write isn’t libertarian because it’s written on a libertarian website. It isn’t libertarian because of where we land on the issues either. It’s because you got there in a libertarian way.

              1. If the same article would be progressive if it were published at Salon, it is not a libertarian article.

                And progressive articles don’t suddenly become libertarian if they’re published at Reason.

        2. but to your point =

          does anyone actually think an administration w/ Bill Weld would be proposing agency heads like the current ones @ DoL, EPA, FDA, SEC, etc?

          even if they’re not people with 100% doctrinaire libertarian credentials, they’re not even remotely mainstream republican flacks…

          normally the people picked for agencies would be politically-connected technocrats who’s aim to use the agencies to benefit the ‘party’ rather than really change the fundamental status quo of how those agencies operate. (see people like that douche Koskinen)

          But almost all of the people proposed so far are the opposite of that. most aren’t even from govt at all. (with exceptions, obviously, like sessions or perry) They’re mostly outsiders who have bitched for years about the problems with these institutions.

          even if these people fail to deliver on 90% of their regulation-shredding promise, it will still be in a direct more-promising than anything anyone’s seen in the last few decades. Far more promising than i think anyone would have imagined 6 months ago.

          of course, acknowledging this is impossible, because purity-posturing is more important.

          1. YOU’RE JUST DEFENDING TRUMP AGAIN WHILE PRETENDING NOT TO I’M SMART AND ON TO YOU

          2. does anyone actually think an administration w/ Bill Weld would be proposing agency heads like the current ones @ DoL, EPA, FDA, SEC, etc?

            Oh fuck no. I’m pleasantly surprised with these picks and voted the Johnson ticket.

          3. How many times did I tell you cucks Trump was more libertarian than GayJay?

    2. “Mr. Atkins remains a critic of regulation, attacking Democrats he says believe they can direct the invisible hand of the market.

      They can direct the invisible hand. Unfortunately, the only thing they can do with it is to make a fist while they’re bending us over.

      1. An invisible foot wearing an invisible hobnailed boot, shoving itself up your ass…forever.

    3. 2009 Reason Profile of Paul Atkins

      The nickname “Dr. No” has been applied to more than former presidential candidate Ron Paul and a certain James Bond villain. In 2005 that’s what Business Week called Paul Atkins, then halfway through his six-year stint on the Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC). This “fierce libertarian,” the magazine warned in its headline, “is slowing some key reforms” of hedge funds. …

      “I would describe myself as having faith in the free markets,” he says. “To compare a few people in government making decisions based on limited information to millions and millions of people making decisions every second with their own hard-earned money, there’s just no comparison there.” Nonetheless, Atkins has supported federal intervention in managing a sale of the investment bank Bear Stearns and forestalling bankruptcies across the financial industry, on the grounds that the interconnectedness of global capital markets, combined with the complexity of securitized over-the-counter instruments, has created conditions in which the liquidation of companies such as Lehman Brothers can cause widespread bank runs and do lasting damage to the financial system.

      Editor in Chief Matt Welch and reason.tv Editor Nick Gillespie spoke with Atkins in early December….

      the link to the video is broke, sadly

      1. By golly, if he’s the new President’s point man on deregulating Wall Street and in line to become either the bank regulation overseer at the Fed or the guy in charge of the SEC, we couldn’t reasonably have hoped for someone more libertarian than that.

        Notice, he’s not talking about bailing out Wall Street by way of TARP.

        He’s talking about seizing Bear when it was about to go bankrupt and reselling it–and maybe without the benefit of hindsight. In real time, reasonable libertarians can disagree about whether it’s better to seize banks that can’t cover their collateralized obligations in order to forestall a crisis or let them go through bankruptcy court over the course of years.

        I’m not sure I agree with his assessment on Bear, but if he’s the worst case scenario for putting someone in charge of the SEC, then he’s probably just as good from a libertarian perspective as whomever President Rand Paul might have appointed.

        We’re having a legitimate libertarian moment there!

        Why all the long faces, Reason?

    4. Fuck the SEC. I’ve been in court against those slimy, immoral, pathetic excuses for human beings. They are as corrupt as most prosectors, but operate in civil court, so they don’t even have to prove beyond a reasonable doubt. Fucking douches fishing for easy wins to boost their careers, and they could care less about actual intent, or even actual guilt.

      1. “If I were President, I suspect I’d want him in charge of the SEC.”

        If the question isn’t whether to have an SEC but who to appoint to be in charge of it, he might be the guy I want.

        If the question is who to appoint to be head of the SEC and given the job of dismantling it, he’s probably the right guy to do that, too.

  94. From Dave Barry’s Year in Review.
    He is so excellent at satire, you know he is saying this as a joke, but I can see Hillary true believers nodding their heads in agreement, enough to even post this on their Facebook pages as truth:

    June:

    Hillary continues to insist that she never emailed anything classified, and even if she did she actually didn’t, besides which so did a lot of other people such as Colin Powell and Harry Truman, and this so-called “scandal” is ancient history from literally years ago that just makes a person sigh and roll her eyes because it is preventing her from fighting for working families while at the same time being a historic woman.

    Read more here: http://www.centredaily.com/new…..rylink=cpy

    1. I’ve heard Hillary Clinton supporters say they “thoroughly researched” the claims about Clinton’s e-mail server and said some variation of, “I don’t see what she did wrong or illegal”. When I pointed out that had I, when I had access to classified information, handled classified information the way she did, I would be in jail, those people got blank looks on their faces. One tried to insist he was correct and I am wrong, but he didn’t get very far.

      1. I have a former Intelligence officer (knows allll about handling classified) friend of mine on FB who was strangely silent about the email thing. Yet made sure to point out the seriousness of Trump taking the phone call from the Taiwan PM cause she knows all about this diplomacy stuff. She was also one of these high-level TDS types who wasn’t sure what to tell her tween (boy, mind you) on Nov 9th.
        To paraphrase A Few Good Men, I can’t believe they let her wear a uniform.

      2. I love how Herself can delete half her emails under subpoena and it’s no big deal. See if you can destroy your records under subpoena and see how forgiving and impressed the executive branch agent across the table will be.

    2. Harry Truman mishandled classified emails?

      Why did I not know this?

      1. Because they covered up the Philadelphia Experiment.

  95. Yes, Subaru, spam that commercial with the fucking annoying Aspie national park kid.

    That’s a great way to get me to buy your products.

    1. Soobaroo.

      As you were.

    2. Glad I’m not the only one who hates that commercial. It drives me insane.

        1. He’s starting young.

      1. That commercial? All of the Subaru commercials turn my stomach. They are all 100% emotional appeal. That pisses me off.

        1. something something marketing to their target audience.

          1. It was written and produced by a guy named Suzuki.

  96. My New Year’s Resolution: To not spend any time involved in the exceedingly tedious recent commenter traditions of bashing Robby Soave, and engaging in the incredibly trite deliberation of Trump Derangement Syndrome.

    1. It’s pretty much a given that libertarians are going to have derangement syndrome about anybody who makes it into power.

    2. MTOGTFO.

    1. We lesbians have been making our own pickles and brewing gross health teas forever

      We know. (mouths = ‘it was the smell’)

      hipsters stole dyke culture, now gay has sad.

      Did plaid flannel come to mind? Work boots? Weirdly cut or especially shaggy hair? Maybe a bike?

      How odd. You just described the cartoon stereotype of a lesbian.

      I think this is the same identity crisis that a lot of blacks had when they realized that the most avid consumers of hiphop culture were actually suburban white kids. its not just “your stuff” anymore. that’s the way shit goes.

      wahh my precious identity is being diluted.

      by the next generation, no one will remember or care. people who are forward thinking have already moved on and found new sandboxes to play in, new cultures to create. the ones standing around and complaining that (surprise!) culture actually “evolves” are dinosaurs neck-deep in the tar pits.

      1. Did plaid flannel come to mind? Work boots? Weirdly cut or especially shaggy hair? Maybe a bike?

        I also like how the author pretends that such things appeared ab origine from lesbian culture and not from dyke performativity of working class males.

        1. “everything my in-group does is original and sui generis = everything the out-group does is cultural appropriation”

          1. ^This. Twenty years ago some kid that worked with me was explaining how his hiphop culture and turn table DJ raves were the most original thing ever. I asked him if he knew what a hoedown was. When I explained it to him he became enraged. He never spoke to me again after that.

            1. I asked him if he knew what a hoedown was.

              G’s up, hoedown

        2. I was wearing flannel shirts in the eighties. I always knew that I was a lesbian trapped in a man’s body, and now I have proof!

  97. I feel for Tony Romo.

    He carried the Cowboys through many years when the owner cared more about headline making players than championship winning team players.

    Romo churned out winning records in years where the OL was so bad he started scrambling the minute the ball was snapped.

    So after Jerry finally turns over to decision making to people who were more interested in building a solid core for the team and then he looses his job to a superstar rookie through injury.

    No one can dispute that he has handled the changing of the guard with class.

    Watching his one series today where he marched the Boys down the field for their only touchdown of the day so far reminded me that he is still the best QB on the Cowboys rooster, just not the youngest nor the sturdiest.

    It will be bittersweet irony if Romo finally get his SB ring while riding the bench.

    Maybe he can win his own ring next year with some other team.

    1. My grandmother could be a superstar QB behind that line.

      More than likely Dak Prescott joins other superstar rookie QBs including Mark Sanchez, Josh Freeman, and Vince Young on the ashheap of history.

      1. They had the same line last year and went 4-12.

        He should be a lock for MVP if MVP voting was for the player who is the most valuable player for their team and not the player most liked by the voters.

        Are there any kind of facts or evidence to back up your statement ?

        Just being a Cowboys hater doesn’t equal a fact.

      2. DONT U FUKKIN TALK SHIY ABOYT YHR BOYS U FUKKIN QUEER

        1. It must really be difficult going through life with 15″ biceps and a 22″ inferiority complex.

          Bless you heart.

    2. It will be bittersweet irony if Romo finally get his SB ring while riding the bench.

      And some odd symmetry, as Romo replaced Bledsoe, who got _his_ SB ring riding the bench, replaced by a young superstar (near) rookie.

    1. it will offend someone

      1. That dude was sucking dick within a week.

        1. I can’t figure out what that thing is around his neck. A bow-tie? An Ascot? A poofy Kleenex-box cover?

          I’d also like to find out how he makes his pocket handkerchief look like a clamshell.

          Nope, not gay. He likes womenwomenwomenwomen brrrrrrrrr!

          1. I believe it’s a napkin from the wedding party in the hall next to the chapel.

      2. The clip after that one was the guy being interviewed by Jimmy Kimmel.

        It was funnier than the first.

      3. In other news, Key and Peele announce retirement citing the inability to create satire that stands above real life.

    1. You as a man, you open your mouth and take a man’s penis in your face, you are perverted

      I hear that the God of the Hebrews otherwise JUST LOVES non-procreative sex, so it’s probably fine when religious social conservative women suck dick?

  98. I’d like Reason to have a New Year’s resolution to have at least a morning and afternoon post every weekend day and holiday. This current post started last year! And at 8am yesterday to boot!

    Seriously, how hard can it be to throw up a post now and then? Perhaps re-run a link from a weekday that got lost in the busy shuffle and only received a half-dozen reads and comments. I’m sure any intern has the tech savvy to do a blog post.

    Even a blank post today saying nothing more than “Happy New Year!” would have been fine.

    Early in December, they hit up the commenters hard for donations, and got hundreds of thousands of dollars as a result — and now suddenly we don’t matter. C’mon Reason, who do you think is supporting this website, and giving you the clicks you need for your advertisers? (Hint: it’s not when one of your writers has a cameo on Russia Today).

    Throw us a bone, Reason. You’re here because of us.

    1. Maybe they need a robot to do it.

    2. Also = i demand a 5th Column thread EVERY WEEK. Even if there is no podcast, and its just to bitch at them.

      1. i mention this only because i’m listening to it now.

          1. (sniffs pits)

            is there a ‘best’ way to stream the podcast? their website seems to lock up my browser because the shitty player is shitty.

            i thought they had a soundcloud page, but it doesn’t seem they use it anymore. I am loathe to sub to ITunes podcasts, because i did that years ago and later discovered like 20 gigs of shit i never listened to lurking on my hard-drive.

            1. seriously, that ‘stitcher’ player or whatever the fuck its called? It had my cpu running on overdrive when the thing was *paused*. Its a complete POS that leaks memory.

              this seems to work lots better
              http://fifthcolumn.podbean.com/

              1. I subscribed via the podcast function on my iphone.

                1. you are a wiser man.

                  if there’s an android app that’s good for these things, i’m open to suggestion.

                  1. Pocket Casts is great on Android.

                  2. I’m not having substantial problems with the Android stitcher app, but I don’t love it either

                  3. I just use Google music. Low demands on resources, ease of use.

            2. I wish they had a downloadable podcast.

              1. Pocket Casts downloads it without issue.

              2. They do. Again, Google music had a download option if you click on the italicized “i” next to the episode

    3. re-run a link from a weekday

      Are you out of your freakin’ mind?

    1. Bourdain – “When we deny them their basic humanity and legitimacy of their views, however different they may be than ours, when we mock them at every turn, and treat them with contempt, we do no one any good.”

      This comment is insightful:

      “Terry Thompson
      3:56 PM CST
      Yea, we should find compassion for hate filled, racist, uneducated and proud of it, Jesus lovin’ folks who actually believe this clown is going to make them all millionaires. Heads up Trumpsters, you’re gonna get just what you deserve. Period. You wanted a sleazy, egotistical, lying, womanizing, crook who’s burned working people every chance he got. . . . you got him. Take your medicine.”

      I love it. I expect them to keep it up, even double down. Four years of Trump will drive them insane. Who wants to bet before Trump’s first term is up we see serious violence from the left?

      1. It’s going to happen before 2017 is up.

        And they’re going to do this for the next four years and wonder why Trump gets re-elected in 2020.

    2. “There are a hell of a lot of nice people out there, who are doing what everyone else in this world is trying to do: the best they can to get by, and take care of themselves and the people they love. When we deny them their basic humanity and legitimacy of their views, however different they may be than ours, when we mock them at every turn, and treat them with contempt, we do no one any good.”

      Silly bourdain. Don’t you know that accusing everyone other than yourself of being a yokel low-IQ mouthbreather is the path to social-dominance? everyone knows that if you sneer hard enough, people come to respect you as superior and enlightened.

      1. “…if you sneer hard enough, people come to respect you as superior and enlightened.”

        Perfect.

    1. Well shit, I wasn’t going to read through 750 comments was I?

    1. motivation still unclear

      1. Probably a conflicted gay

    2. Mental illness is the usual excuse.

    3. We shouldn’t jump to conclusions.

      For all we know it was a lone nut maligning Islam.

  99. Here are the eight Trump Cabinet picks Democrats plan to target

    Incoming Senate Minority Leader Charles E. Schumer (D-N.Y.) has told Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-Ky.) that Democrats will home in especially on Rex Tillerson, Trump’s choice for secretary of state; Sen. Jeff Sessions (R-Ala.), his pick for attorney general; Rep. Mick Mulvaney (R-S.C.), tapped to lead the Office of Management and Budget; and Betsy DeVos, selected to serve as education secretary.

    There’s also Rep. Tom Price (R-Ga.), Trump’s pick to lead the Department of Health and Human Services and oversee changes to Obamacare, who is expected to be attacked by Democrats for his support for privatizing Medicare. Andrew Puzder, a restaurant executive set to serve as labor secretary, will face scrutiny for past comments on the minimum wage, among other policies. Steve Mnuchin, a former Goldman Sachs partner set to serve as treasury secretary, and Oklahoma Attorney General Scott Pruitt, Trump’s pick to lead the EPA, will also be the focus of Democratic attacks, aides said.

    1. “President-elect Trump is attempting to fill his rigged cabinet with nominees that would break key campaign promises and have made billions off the industries they’d be tasked with regulating,” Schumer said in a statement Sunday confirming his caucus’s plans. “Any attempt by Republicans to have a series of rushed, truncated hearings before Inauguration Day and before the Congress and public have adequate information on all of them is something Democrats will vehemently resist. If Republicans think they can quickly jam through a whole slate of nominees without a fair hearing process, they’re sorely mistaken.”

      1. Good luck with that Moobs.

        1. They have the right to pound the table. That’s all they have.

    2. I’m sure they’ll find a lot of ways to go after Dr. Tom Price for HHS. Price has a lot of good ideas about reforming Medicare and replacing Obamacare, and he has done a lot to needle the Left (including fighting to defund NPR, aka the Democrat Propaganda Network).

      If I were him, I’d quickly dissociate myself and then denounce my former membership in the wacko medical organization “American Physicians and Surgeons”. The association is ultra-right-wing, and its journal has advocated “a range of scientifically discredited hypotheses, including the belief that HIV does not cause AIDS, that being gay reduces life expectancy, that there is a link between abortion and breast cancer, and that there are links between autism and vaccinations.”

      The Left-friendly media could have a field day linking him to this group, and even average Joes will be shocked at some of the things they’ve supported. If they can convince everyone that when Trump said “some illegal immigrants from Mexico are rapists” the actual quote was “all Mexicans are rapists”, which now is considered fact on political websites and op-ed pages, they can destroy Price much more easily.

      I’m pretty sure this is going to happen, and unsure if that can be overcome for approval. It’s too bad, because as a physician myself, I’d like to see an MD leading HHS, especially someone who wants to dramatically overhaul the agency — but this guy might end up having to fall on his sword so that the Dems can at least stop one nominee.

      1. If I were him, I’d quickly dissociate myself and then denounce my former membership in the wacko medical organization “American Physicians and Surgeons”. The association is ultra-right-wing, and its journal has advocated “a range of scientifically discredited hypotheses, including the belief that HIV does not cause AIDS, that being gay reduces life expectancy, that there is a link between abortion and breast cancer, and that there are links between autism and vaccinations.”

        Gadzooks! That he hasn’t already dissociated himself from that organization is telling.

      2. Were the R’s able to block any of Obama’s appts? Have the dems ever allowed one of their own to fall on their sword as a bone tossed to the R’s? I am not sure they are in a position to block any of Trump’s appts and I would not be surprised if he does jam them all through in spite of D objections.

        I think the R base is tired of watching the D’s observing street fighting rules while the R’s follow Queensbury rules. There is deep suspicion that much of the R opposition to D’s is just theater. That’s how we got Trump.

        If he were to toss them a bone this guy looks like a good candidate. Sessions also.

        1. Were the R’s able to block any of Obama’s appts?

          I’m not sure the point schumer is making has to do with actually *blocking* any appointments, but rather simply dragging out the process in some screaming hissy fit to make it politically unpleasant.

          Which they would do regardless. the reason for telling everyone that’s what they intend to do is simply to signal to their dwindling voter-base that they’re “doing something”. RESIST!!

          does the article actually say whether they could stop appointments on votes alone? i don’t see any mention. It seems they just want to make noise so they can be (maybe) granted some concession on something else in exchange for shutting up.

      3. The Left-friendly media could have a field day linking him to this group

        Which bills itself as the “oldest libertarian or in america” or somesuch.

        The Paul’s were members. I don’t think Rand quit until after he was elected.

        being gay reduces life expectancy

        Of course it does.

    3. OMG they’ve expressed opinions contrary to leftist orthodoxy! To the ramparts!!

  100. new year, new derp

    NYC’s brand new subway is the most expensive in the world ? that’s a problem
    by Matthew Yglesias

    Until places like New York and California ? the bluest jurisdictions that are most open to the idea of taxing and spending to improve public services ? get better at actually delivering those services in a cost-effective way, it’s going to be difficult to persuade residents of more skeptical jurisdictions that it makes sense to take the same agenda national.

    Wow! That’s actually a good point.

    1. A good point built on so many false premises that I barely know where to begin. Until the most corrupt governments in the country get better at delivering services through pointless giant cronyist boondoggles…hahaha.

    2. Yglesias made a good point.

      The most shocking moment of 2017 has already happened. It’s all downhill from here.

    3. They have no incentive to improve public services. The current cycle is perfect: Democratic politicians give tax money to public employee unions, who kick back part of it as campaign contributions. The worse the public services are, the more it proves the need for higher taxes, more unionized employees, and more Democratic politicians.

    4. Luckily they’ll never be able to do it.

    5. Until places like New York and California ? the bluest jurisdictions that are most open to the idea of taxing and spending to improve public services ? get better at actually delivering those services in a cost-effective wayget the fuck out of the way and charter the private sector with fixing the mass transit problems with minimal obstacles, it’s going to be difficult to persuade residents of more skeptical jurisdictions that it makes sense to take the same agenda national have public transit that isn’t mediocre athe best and not a complete gouge.

    6. An old-style “cut and cover” construction method would never fly politically

      I know! The opportunities for graft presented by digging as deeply, slowly, and expensively as possible are so much richer.

      *reads further*

      Oh, I see the huge cost overruns are due to America’s “extremely weak” labor unions. Sounds legit.

  101. My first thought reading the headline was, “…after they learned Kamala Harris represented them in congress”

    Afghan refugees coming to California struggle with PTSD

    they focus principally on an anecdote about a guy who was shot in the face by a teenager with a ‘flare gun’. there seems to be an insinuation that it was a hate crime, or it was done ‘because’ he was a refugee… but there’s no actual mention of motives. America has failed him, or something. Never mind that the Taliban would have murdered his family for his collaboration. Or that he’s moaning about America’s lack of socialized-healthcare while waving around a $700 smartphone.

  102. My awful date with Donald Trump: The real story of a nightmare evening with a callow but cash-less heir

    My date leaned over and said, “Hop in.” I didn’t know what to make of this. I lived in NYC and nobody ever picked me up in a car except to go to the airport. I was too surprised and flustered to be impressed. I felt like I was in a James Dean movie. If he wanted to impress me, a Cadillac wouldn’t do it, but if he got out of the car, and opened the door for me, then I would be impressed.

    1. if he got out of the car, and opened the door for me, then I would be impressed.

      are you kidding, princess? no one’s done that since the fucking 1930s.

      1. And yet she probably describes herself as a feminist and a “strong, independent” woman while expecting men to open doors for her and buy her dinner.

        1. You just described my wife!
          #feministonlywhenthere’snomanaroundtopay

          1. My current GF invited me to dinner the other week, then was shocked! to find that expected her to pay. And yes, she’s a liberal feminist who goes on rants about sexism, the pay gap, etc.

            1. I’d hope you expected her to pay for yours too, since she invited you.

              (your original statement was unclear)

              1. Yes, i expected her to pay. Who the fuck invites someone to dinner, chooses the restaurant, then expects you to pay? A liberal feminist, apparently.

                1. So….you get to give ass to mouth? What’s the appeal here?

            2. My current GF … a liberal feminist

              DenverJ, I do not think that this good for either of you.

              1. Charles, you are probably correct. I’ve been trying to change her viewpoint, at least a little, and having little luck. The best results so far were immediately after the election, when I pointed out, during one of her rants, that I am a white male, that she was calling white males sexist and racist, and that I was not going to stay around to be insulted.

      2. What? I open doors for my wife, including car doors even on simple trips to the grocery store. Get the hell off of my lawn.

        1. its the “getting out of the drivers seat, going all the way around the car, THEN opening doors” that’s the implausible expectation.

          just opening doors for people as a habit isn’t what she was talking about. she wanted the royal treatment.

          1. When picking up a date, I would. On the other hand, I could see that being a problem when picking up a date in Manhatten.

          2. That is exactly what I meant. The royal treatment.

            I know, I know, I rarely ever see anyone else doing it, but I do and my wife likes it.

      3. C did it in A Bronx Tale in the 1970s.

    2. She is saying that Trump can be boorish. This is a shocking surprise to us all.

      1. She’s the one who picked the shithole place that couldn’t take credit cards…. jus sayin’

    3. It’s a non-story, and I still wouldn’t be surprised if it was all made-up.

    4. The car had a phone in it. I had never been in a car with a telephone. I don’t know why, but I didn’t think it was special.

      The author claims this took place in the early 70s and didn’t think there was anything special about a car with a phone in it?

      1. Yeah, full on bullshit. Maybe C. Anacreon can shed a little expert light here but all those mentions, caddy, car phone, just to say she wasn’t impressed add up to lying about her reaction or lying about the whole incident.

        1. “Howard Hughes had TWO phones in his plane during my date with him, and he flew over the Grand Canyon. Trump didn’t impress me.”

  103. Russian Reset

    On Friday, Russian magazine Life published a story titled “Year of the Monkey Who Slammed the Door” with Obama’s image in it. The author called Obama “vindictive” and “revengeful” and declared “”I hope I never again have to write about the weakest president in the history of the United States.”

    An aide in the State Duma, Maria Katasonova also made a reference to the Chinese zodiac in her public post. She tweeted: “The Year of the Monkey is coming to an end. The monkey is angry and has a final shit.”

    1. I suspect that they would not consider it appropriate if anyone celebrated if (e.g.) a Black Lives Matter activist died in an anti-police riot.

    2. This helps us not lose sight of the fact that leftists are always and everywhere the same. The nature of these people is no different from the nature of the leftists that murdered 100M people in the 20th century. Don’t doubt for a minute that if they had their way they wouldn’t have the deplorables lined up and shot or that it cant happen here.

      1. *Dont doubt for a minute……that it can happen here.”

        1. Could it happen here? Not without gutting the 2A and then somehow enforcing the new controls somehow.

          Our founders were astoundingly wise. I think it couldn’t happen here without a seismic shift.

          That said, my Suthern friend, I will agree with you wholeheartedly that the lefties want it to. Because we are all wrong thinkers, not because they are evil.

          Quick quibble with the article: ‘the gun went off’ and ‘accidentally discharged’ are bullshit passive voice. We mock cop press releases for this. Is this just a “conservative” thing?

  104. Germany markets “safe shorts” to protect women from rape by Muslim migrants

    AN ENTREPRENEUR from Germany has created trousers with the aim of protecting women from possible sex attacks while they are out jogging ? and the first 150 were sold out immediately.

    The trousers come with a lock for women’s intimate areas and an alarm, so would ensure the wearers were kept safe from any sex attacks.

    Business graduate, Sandra Seilz, decided to invent the trousers after she was attacked by three drunk men when she was jogging in the woods.

    Women’s intimate areas will be sealed off with a “protective shield”.

    The website says: “Get into your safe shorts, pull the ergonomically placed high-tech cords that are tear and cut-resistant until the trousers are in place.

    “The the cords are fixed to a power alarm.

    “Should someone try to get into the trousers of the jogger the alarm will go off at a volume of 130 decibels, which is supposed to scare off the attacker.”

      1. I was half expecting a portrait of Jim Dangle.

        1. I don’t want to creep you out that much.

        2. I was thinking Tobias F??nke.

      2. Thank you for the phrasing, Ted.

        I guessed correctly.

        1. Thank you for the phrasing, Ted.

          I’ll take “Swords” for $400.

    1. “Let’s import so many medieval thinking people that we have to reintroduce the chastity belt”.
      Ironically, the chastity belt’s hay day was during the crusades, when all the little lordlings went off to fight the crusades, and said lordling didn’t want his wife to be able to screw (or wash her privates, or be comfortable) while they fought the Muslims.
      That’s gotta be good for irony points. Like, 100k irony points.

  105. Sweden: Muslim migrants enraged over not being given “own house”

    His fellow Syrian, Mahmoud, made a similar appeal for compassion in an interview broadcast Tuesday. “I want a house”, he told Swedish Radio, bemoaning having to live in an apartment, which he said hampered his chances of finding a girlfriend.

    Presenter Katarina Gunnarsson notes that the Syrian’s room, paid for by taxpayers “looks like a hotel room”, but Mahmoud said he had higher expectations of life in Sweden.

    “I had very high hopes of getting my own private house. And then they give me this apartment. It’s like a refugee camp. What is the difference?” the former Damascus resident complained.

    “I’m 25 years old and have not had a girlfriend before. I’m still a virgin. I’m looking for a girlfriend, I’m looking for a wife. But this is impossible, how can I be able to have a life in this room?”

    1. 25 year old virgin whines about not getting laid. Pffftt. The outrageous thing is that he’s given a platform. Why can’t he just go cry on reddit like everyone else in the world.

      1. Positive spin (or possibly The Onion article):

        An Assimilation Success Story: Syrian Millennial as entitled, whiny as local ones, fits right in

        1. Winner.

      2. At least he’s not going out and raping women like his co-religionists.

        1. At least he’s not reproducing more little whiny, entitled brats and teaching them his ugly religion.

    2. The best and brightest the Middle East has to offer right there.

    3. This is supposed to help advance Western nations?

      Huh.

  106. Freedom Fest is sponsoring a cruise of the Danube next fall to tour “in the footsteps of Mises and Hayek”.

    Not only do you get to check out a lot of the history of the Austrian economists, they have a number of lectures by economists on the ship.

    This looks very tempting, but I’m sure that my wife will quickly say “no” to the faintest suggestion.
    Perhaps I need to trade in for a late-model that would love to combine travel and libertarian philosophy.

    1. Is it a money thing, or ‘so boring’ thing? If second, you may get somewhere showing off pictures of Linz, Vienna and Budapest. They are lovely cities with lots of exploring she can do while you’re off on a Mises guided tour.

    2. Those cities have lots of things to do if she wants to skip out on the on-shore seminars/economics related stuff.

      The Kunst Historisches Museum opening early for the group is a good thing. That place can get crowded.

      1. Right — so in trying to convince her, I can say, “but, honey, you can go to the Kunts museum!”

        1. Hmm… That could be awkward. “Kunst Historisches Museum” means “Art History Museum”. That might be better.

    3. Why on earth would your wife object to a cruise on the Danube?

      1. Also, I would think hard about that ‘trading in for a late-model’.

        “Hell is having your dreams come true” is what my grandfather would say.

      2. I think she was really objecting to posting a link to a slow-loading PDF.

      3. Because it’s not Tahiti?

        1. OK, that is a perfectly acceptable objection to a Danube cruise.

        2. This summer she’s turning 50, so any major trip is going to be her wish, not mine.

          I think she has her heart set on going to the Galapagos. If any of you have any tips on that — especially a more small-scale operation rather than a big cruise ship — please chime in.

          1. My aunt and uncle went recently. I wish I had paid more attention during the slideshow.

            I’m doing either Tahiti, Hawaii, or Riviera Maya in February. 10th anniversary. I want to do some eco stuff at Xel-Ha and maybe climb some pyramids.

          2. I have relatives that have been to the Galapagos twice. Usually these relatives couch-surf and use airbnb, but I think both trips to the Galapagos they went via cruises. I think they were small cruise ships. I can do some digging if you’d like. You can contact me at my semi-throw-away e-mail address: dgroves140 AT gmail DOT com.

    4. Why don’t you just go alone if you want to?

      1. This might just be the answer. I do have to be in Berlin on business a week after the end of the cruise, so technically could combine the two into one trip; I’m wondering if there’d be a way to make a 2.5-week trip work, and what to do during that first week in October in Germany if I had to make that work. Hmm.. isn’t that Oktoberfest?

        1. Oktoberfest ends the first weekend in October.

          Weekends at Oktoberfest tend to be really, really crowded. Almost not worth going. I went during the week. A M?nchener I know said going during the week and not the weekend is a good idea.

  107. Raiders fans: most annoying fans? They are in this bar.

      1. Now they’re super excited about getting rid of that goose egg going into the fourth quarter.

        1. Damn it all, I don’t care about either of these teams but I’m going to have another drink just to watch theirs loose.

        2. That’s more an An Ohio State did yesterday.

    1. Eagles have always ranked #1 on most lists.

    1. I see that hyperlink you bastard.

      1. + catch and release

    2. Thankfully, hovering over the link reveals the URL.

    3. That right there is why I hover over links before clicking…

      1. Dagnabbit I posted the wrong link. Sorry, gents!

        1. /* makes note to never click any link from CJ, just in case

          1. I learned that a long time ago

      2. Ted and Slumbrew,

        What is your preferred means can to preview an URL (on H&R or elsewhere)?

        1. Your browser should do it. Change the view settings so the status bar is visible.

          1. Thank you, Sir.

          2. Correct – I’m using Chrome, so if I put the pointer over a link, the destination shows up in the status bar. CJ talks about a “mermaid” and I see “lenadunham” in the URL, I’m out.

      1. That is awesome!

      2. Not the one of her sitting on a toilet nude and stuffing an entire cake into her mouth?

        1. No, it’s actually good.

    4. That’s not a mermaid. There are other critters in the sea with horizontal flukes.

      1. I feel bad for Lena Dunham. A woman with less sex appeal than a young Maureen Stapleton can’t have much hope for her looks in the future.

    5. “Oh, the huge manatee!”

    6. Mermaid my ass.

      That is clearly a blue whale.

  108. Speaking of derp: The 10 Maddest Things Done By Students This Year

    Some highlights:

    The hand-raising scandal at Edinburgh
    A student at the University of Edinburgh felt the wrath of the SU Safe Space policy when she raised her hand in disagreement at a council meeting. Putting your hand up counts as a ‘discriminatory action’, and so a complaint was made against the student. Her crime was to use a gesture to ‘indicate disagreement’ ? no disagreement is allowed in the starched, censored world of the student official.

    The University of Sussex Students’ Union, as part of its ‘I Heart Consent’ campaign, was one of several unions to hold consent classes, telling students that sex that falls short of ‘enthusiastic’ could be a potential assault. Students were encouraged to ‘make a t-shirt or card that shows your commitment to consent’ and to attend ‘zero tolerance’ workshops.

    So if your t-shirt indicates consent, does taking it off to have sex indicate you have withdrawn consent…? Or to change your mind and not consent, you take it off…? I don’t think they thought that one through. Unless Brits have sex while wearing t-shirts.

    1. Her crime was to use a gesture to ‘indicate disagreement’ ? no disagreement is allowed in the starched, censored world of the student official.

      They can disagree with you, you just can’t disagree with them.

    2. ? Different opinions are OK, as long as they’re all different in the same way!

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dmeSGwVBoao

      1. Why the heck hasn’t he done more of those? That one and “Ain’t No Rest For The Triggered” were just sublime.

    3. Why is this happening to me? What did I do? I didn’t do anything.

      1. +1 Kafka

    4. Christ, can’t we just give everyone their own “safe word” when they turn a certain age? IT’S NOT THAT COMPLICATED, PEOPLE!

  109. Wine tonight. I’m trying to finish a bottle, from which I had two glasses last night, of Austrian red from Burgenland.

      1. No, sadly. I brought the bottle back from Vienna in my checked luggage. I needed room for other bottles of booze, so only one bottle of this wine. I think this is the last bottle of booze from Vienna.

      2. Reason #326 I need to cut back. “A bottle of wine” elicits the response, “And then what?”

        1. You say that as though it were a bad thing.

          1. Considering the swill I drink it’s not like I’m knocking them back for taste.

            1. I’m finishing off some goddamn Barefoot sparkling wine, since I refuse to dump it.

              (I’ll confess it’s not that bad)

              1. The Prosecco at midnight really killed me this morning. The beers and the many shots of tequila didn’t help, but I’m pretty sure the Prosecco caused my hangover.

                1. 2 bottles, and I’m fine.

                  1. I like my two bottles poured into one. Ever heard of the Gallo family? I hadn’t either, but seven bucks for a liter and a half of Sauv Blanc is pretty okay. D?class?? I wouldn’t live any other way.

                    1. You joke, I assume, but not all Gallo wine is bum wine low end. I was surprised at some of these:

                      http://www.gallo.com/portfolio/

                      Apparently I was drinking a Gallo wine earlier (Barefoot).

                    2. And I was thinking about the fancy Gallo-branded wines before I got distracted by that site:

                      http://www.gallosignatureseries.com/

                      I read a story a few years back about those – basically, the younger Gallos were tired of their name being associated with cheap crap and those signature wines were created in the hopes elevating things a bit.

      1. It is. It’s a shame Austrian reds are damn near impossible to find in the US.

        1. As a general rule, don’t the regions north of the Alps and east of France produce better whites than reds?

          Of course, I’m not particularly well-to-do, so I tend to by moderately priced wines from south of the equator.

          1. I’ve heard that. I’m not a wine guru or connoisseur by any stretch, but I have liked the reds I’ve had from Germany and Austria.

    1. If you wanted to be mean, you would have recommended Marnie.

      1. If I were mean, I would have recommended Harold and Maude, but that was too weird even for me.

        1. Have you seen Pretty Poison?

          1. Ooh, it stars Anthony Perkins and Tuesday Weld.

            “When a mentally disturbed young man tells a pretty girl that he’s a secret agent, she believes him, and murder and mayhem ensue.”

            No, I haven’t seen it, I just can’t envision Anthony Perkins as a mentally disturbed young man.

              1. I’m just glad he didn’t get typecast.

    2. I don’t see Dustin wrestling with the concept of filial piety. Completely different situation.

      1. Don’t ask…don’t encourage him…don’t ask…don’t encourage him…

  110. Unsurprising

    For progs, there is no such thing as “too many minorities in prison”.

    1. I carry a knife that I can open with one hand, because of my work. This knife would land me afoul of the law in NY. Construction workers absolutely carry these knives, and fuck the NYPD for using the law to arrest people.
      I’m amazed when people ask me why I carry a knife. My usual response is incredulity that they don’t! How does a person get through the day without a knife? The knife was the second tool ever invented, right after the rock hammer that you needed in order to make your rock knife.
      Could I use it to attack someone? Sure. I could also use my backpack filled with heavy objects (tools). Should we ban backpacks?
      In summation: fuck the government.

        1. So, that’s a utility knife, razor knife, or box cutter, depending on your field/local. It also what they used to highjack the election the planes on 9/11.
          Useful for lots of things, and I have several, but too flimsy for what I often need. This is what I usually carry.

          1. I cut a bunch of drywall, and a drywall knife is basically all I need.

            I’m pretty sure I could burnish a sharper knife than most people buy given the grinders we use and some good steel. Fuck, I catch myself all the time bleeding from new cuts I don’t recall giving myself simply because commercial construction is full of sharp edges.

            1. Yeah. That’s the right knife for you, then. Except that your picture was of old technology; the new ones have extra blades under the fold out grip and a quick release button.

              1. The funny thing is, I have a huge paranoia about fingers and limbs getting cut or caught up in blades. Circular saws, table saws, reciprocating saws, grinders… jayzus. I used to obsess about bizarre, highly improbable shit like getting my corneas or achilles tendon or vas deferens snipped by an errant razor blade. These days I worry about getting digits mauled by power tools. It’s really arresting when I think about it. But I suppose that’s why it will never actually happen, because I am religious about how I handle blades. I suppose that is in part what drives progressives so crazy about firearms, they have no experience handling them.

                1. And now all I can think about is putting my pinky through a bandsaw. Nobody does that! All the injuries we ever have are related to falling. The worst was a guy who toppled off the scaffold and fell maybe twenty feet, taking the scaffold with him. The plank he was standing on nearly crushed his skull, and he ended up blind in one eye. That’s the sort of accident you really have to worry about. But for me, it’s the goddamn blades. I think it’s why I want to play the violin again, because I love my fingers so much, and the thought of losing them obsesses me.

                  1. Today at work I did no less than a) score out a line of tile with a grinder, b) cut out a bunch of plywood and slatwall with a skilsaw, and c) use a chopsaw to cut metal inserts for same. Number of digits lost? 0. And yet I’m fucking obsessed with the idea!

                2. Well, that’s a perfectly rational mindset. I was in my early twenties I cut the top inch off of my thumb. You get too comfortable, you get sloppy, you get hurt
                  Also, i hate drywall, texture, and paint. I’m very good at all three, but my god, it’s sooo monotonous. I don’t mind a little here and there as part of repair or remodel, but more than three or four sheets, I’d rather sub it out

                  1. My dad cut his forefinger nearly to the bone with a table saw, twice. And he’s the guy who taught me everything I know.

                    I think I’m in the same business you are. We do mainly framing. Drywall sometimes for small jobs, mudding and texture and paint almost never. And lately a lot of demo, which I prefer. Sledgehammers and chipping hammer. Good times.

  111. I’m taking the red pill. Gonna find out how deep this rabbit hole goes.

  112. Civil War cannonballs blowed up real good; historic preservationists hardest hit

    “Archaeologists who study historic munitions say that if they’re handled properly, they shouldn’t pose much of a risk.”

  113. We won the last Cold War. We will win the next one too.

    In a strange way, Trump could be just crazy enough ? enough of a outlier and a rogue ? to expose what Putin’s Russia is and end the current cycle of upheaval and decline.

    Like, who believes this shit??

  114. There once was a man named Fry
    Who gave limerick writing a try
    He did just fine
    Until the fourth line

    1. …when he saw something shiny and got distracted?

  115. I wear zoot suit with side vents five inches long,
    I have two-tone brogues yeah you know this is wrong.
    But the main thing is unless you’re a fool,
    Ah you know you gotta know, yeah you know, yeah you gotta be cool.

  116. A la Rocky & Bullwinkle show-closing line:

    2017, the year of no new reason content. Or, 2016 – everyone/everything else may have died but not this thread.

    1. “Due to our ongoing squirrel infestation, we will be doing away with comments in 2017, though we’ll leave the last post of 2016 open for another week…”

      1. Negatives: I’ll have to find something constructive to do during the day.
        Positives: I’ll never have to read a Tulpa comment again.

        1. I sat here and weighed that for about 5 minutes.

    1. That stuff’s the shiznit.

    2. Theses guys are still out there on the road somewhere.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fflAlfGUB6k

        1. Have you ever seen The Angry Breed?

          http://www.dailymotion.com/vid…..shortfilms

          In addition to having an amazing soundtrack and the greatest plot ever, it introduced the world to surf Nazis.

          1. it introduced the world to surf Nazis.

            Wasn’t “Surf Nazis Must Die” a film by the makers of the Toxic Avenger (Troma?)

            ok, ‘distributed‘, not produced. close enough.

            1. Yeah, Surf Nazis Must Die was a Troma picture, but that was a parody on the surf Nazis in movies like The Angry Breed.

              Surf Nazis Must Die was from 1987.

              The Angry Breed was from 1968.

              1. I know, i was just remarking that the only subsequent legacy i was aware of was the 1980s film… which was like a stoner-skater-punk staple

                1. Yeah, I was a Troma fan.

                  The Angry Breed is like a low budget version of a Troma film.

                  It’s that bad, and by “bad”, I mean awesome.

                2. Yeah, I was a Troma fan.

                  The Angry Breed is like a low budget version of a Troma film.

                  It’s that bad, and by “bad”, I mean awesome.

  117. I think they should change the name of the Redskins . . . to “The Sadness Machine”.

  118. Uncle Eddie’s hangover remedy: Turn the volume up real loud, and click this.

    Did I say headache *remedy*? I meant more like enhancer.

  119. Will you people keep it down?!? I’m trying to drink!

  120. I can think of many, many ways this could (read: Will) go wrong and hardly any of it going well: Enlist hair-doers to snitch on clients:

    “New Illinois law enlists stylists to combat domestic abuse”
    […]
    “A new Illinois law enlists hairstylists to prevent domestic abuse. According to the associated press, the law, which takes effect sunday, mandates that cosmetology workers receive mandated abuse training as part of their licensing.”
    http://www.sfgate.com/nation/a…..829872.php

    I’ll start:
    1) It now make ‘training’ protectionism with an excuse!
    2) Barbers don’t get the training? Sexism!
    3) Remember that time you stiffed the hair-doer? Ooops!
    4) ‘Gee, I’m sorry I slipped there. Oh is that?…’
    It’s fun AND easy!

    1. Sounds like whoever runs those courses in Illinois bribed a couple of state assemblymen.

    2. I commented on that on SFGate. (I’m PapayaSF there as well.)

  121. I’ve been watching some old episodes of Top Gear. I’ve noticed a significant number of good looking women in the audience.

    These women aren’t Page 3 Girls (though Top Gear did have one, Peta, on the show). I don’t see Elizabeth Hurley, Nigella Lawson, Joss Stone, or Amy Williams in the audience. Though Amy Williams made some appearances on the show, and as a side note, met her husband on Tindr.

    Where do they find these women? Import them from Eastern Europe?

    1. Oops… Joss Stone was on Top Gear once.

  122. OK, guys, borrow some of AC’s stash and watch this.

  123. Hot chicks and cars and hot chicks and being on TV, it just works out that way. They just gravitate to it.

    It’s like evolution. It’s like butterfly migration.

    Butterflies migrate from Mexico to Canada over the course of three generations. Then the ones that are born Canada migrate in one shot all the way from Canada to the same grove in Mexico where their great, great grandparents were born. What is it that attracts them to the same grove of trees–where they’ve never been before?

    It doesn’t really matter. The point is that women migrate to be on TV shows with awesome cars like that.

    Female salmon swim upstream against the current to lay their eggs because they think they’re going to be on TV with awesome cars once they get there–or whatever the salmon version of that is.

    Cosmetics are listed in the Dow components group under Consumer Non Cyclicals–women don’t stop using cosmetics during recessions.

    https://biz.yahoo.com/p/perprdconameu.html

    Look, there’s Avon, Revlon, and Estee Lauder in there with Smith & Wesson.

    They’ll eat less food before they stop using cosmetics. And do you know why?

    Because they never know when they might get a chance to go on TV with some awesome cars.

    1. They’ll eat less food before they stop using cosmetics.

      You didn’t link to the entire Consumer Staples (non-cyc) sector, you linked specifically to the “Personal & Household Care” subsector.

      Consumer Staples obviously includes food

      Smith & Wesson actually wouldn’t be in Consumer Non-Cyc anyway; it would be in Industrials/Defense. given the way its regulated, i don’t think it would belong in an inherently defensive (*pun intended) category.

      I’m not really disagreeing with any point you’re making, i’m just making a little irrelevant nitpick because meh, my life

      1. Notice the food they’re pointing to in Consumer Non Cyclical: Crops, Fish/Livestock, Food Processing, . . . we’re talking about staples.

        Women still eat food during recessions. They have to eat to survive, but they’ll eat less food to keep the cosmetics or they’ll eat more top ramen and rice and cheap stuff like that. Hey, I needed to go on a diet anyway!

        The point is that cosmetics are like food and heart medication that way–in that sales don’t drop much during recessions.

        And I’m not just going by the market either–I’ve seen this with my own eyes. I remember the broke girls from college. I remember the three girls I lived with at the beach. In their 20s, they’d starve before they went without makeup. And the older they get, the more makeup they need.

        My grandmother was one of the most frugal people I’ve ever known. She was wealthy and smart as whip deep into her 90s–but she had to go to the beauty parlor once a week. She would go through my suitcase and darn my socks rather than let me waste two bucks on another pair, but she wasn’t going anywhere without some cosmetics.

        1. Notice the food they’re pointing to in Consumer Non Cyclical: Crops, Fish/Livestock, Food Processing, . . . we’re talking about staples.

          http://portfolios.morningstar……ture=en-US

          Smith & Wesson Holding Corporation
          Sector: Industrial Goods
          Industry: Aerospace/Defense Products & Services

          Smith & Wesson is in the Consumer Non Cyclical list–if their revenue, historically, doesn’t fall much during recessions, then that’s where they belong.

          smdh

          for fucks sake ken, take a hint

          1. Just because I don’t agree with you doesn’t mean I don’t understand you.

            Boeing is both a defense stock and a cyclical stock. It’s typically understood that when Boeing’s p/e is low, the market is saying it’s expensive relative to earnings at that top point in the cycle, and when the p/e is high, the stock is relatively cheap–relative to where the market thinks we are at the bottom of the cycle. In other words, the p/e in highly cyclical stocks means the opposite of what people typically expect.

            Smith and Wesson may be called a defense stock in terms of the industry it’s in–like Boeing is in the defense industry, and Revlon is in cosmetics–but if Smith and Wesson’s earnings do not fluctuate as much as other companies in tandem with the business cycle and if the overwhelming majority of their sales are to retail consumers, then in addition to being a defense stock, Smith and Wesson is also a consumer non-cyclical stock.

            There are a number of different industries represented in the consumer non cyclical index: cosmetics, food, a defense company in Smith and Wesson. Non cyclical stocks are non cyclical regardless of what industry they’re in. They’re non cyclical because of what their earnings don’t do during the economic cycle.

      2. Smith & Wesson is in the Consumer Non Cyclical list–if their revenue, historically, doesn’t fall much during recessions, then that’s where they belong. I can think of several reasons why their earnings wouldn’t be cyclical. For one, some of their sales go to military and police departments, etc., and spending for that doesn’t necessarily drop during recessions. Also, if crime ticks upwards during recessions, that probably drives more sales to consumers, too. I don’t know the specifics; I’m just generalizing–but they are listed there under consumer non cyclical.

        I guess firearms are like cosmetics–maybe even more so. How many rednecks get divorced when times are tough because he won’t sell his guns so that she can afford her cosmetics?

        1. I can’t think of a single S&W product which the US military buys. I believe there don’t even give 38 SPL revolvers to pilots anymore. As far as I can tell they are not defense related at all.

          1. The stat I saw said that 85% of their revenue was to civilians. I have no idea what they sell to whom apart from what I saw with a quick google search. I suppose they may sell a lot to the police and maybe they sell internationally?

            Regardless, there must be some explanation for why their earnings don’t track the business cycle.

            1. I wasn’t trying to piss on you. I just know the small arms industry pretty well and couldn’t think of anything S&W sells to the US military. If they have a sub-division or some other line I am not aware of I would like to know more about that.

              1. It’s an interesting question as to why their gun sales are both highly dependent on sales to consumers (rather than government) and non cyclical.

                I suppose it’s an empirical thing. I speculate about why women don’t stop buying cosmetics much during a recession, but the speculation as to why they do that isn’t as important as the observation that they don’t stop buying cosmetics much during a recession.

                Why consumers keep buying guns during a recession is an interesting question, too, but I guess the important observation is that–for whatever reason–they do keep buying during recessions.

  124. This place is a hive of whiteness.

      1. wow, that was possibly the worst mislinking i’ve ever done.

        i meant something else. which was african. i’ve since changed my mind

  125. “Oil pipeline protesters unfurl huge banner at Vikings game”
    http://www.sfgate.com/news/tex…..829704.php

    As an example of how they intend to convince the businesses involved:
    “The banner urged Minneapolis-based U.S. Bank to divest from the four-state, $3.8 billion pipeline. Opponents contend the pipeline could affect drinking water and Native American artifacts. Texas-based developer Energy Transfer Partners says the pipeline will be safe.”
    Yep, some good ol’ Gaia appeals along with a dose of Amer-Indian religious hooey. I know my bank takes that as valid currency.

    1. I read that as unfurling a huge boner.

    2. By “divest”, they mean “sell at a huge loss”?

      Native American artifacts? They must be really important if they’re just sitting there in the dirt.

      1. “They must be really important if they’re just sitting there in the dirt.”

        They’re also more important if we don’t know they are sitting there in the dirt. If we find them and somehow dig them up, they lose their importance, ’cause stuff white people can’t know. ‘Cause racist white folks!

  126. I’m going to through my fate into the hands of the Emperor Valens this year. Who’s with me?

      1. You’ll be consumed in an orgy of violence. But you’ll be protected from the Huns at least.

        1. Wikipedia reminded me that he was Arian.

    1. Wow. Throw, throe and through. I’m confused.

  127. How stupid do those people in Cologne have to be to try the exact same thing in the exact same place two years in a row?

      1. Had to Google to see what if anything happened. First link came up was complaints over racial profiling by the cops from the same people who denied any rapes happened last year.

    1. Were there more rapes? There were more rapes, weren’t there?

      When the Muslim issue comes up, the cosmos like to insist that the fear of terrorism is irrational. They aren’t all terrorists, Islam isn’t the problem etc. etc. etc. Only, the terrorism is really just the tip of the iceberg. There’s a whole host of other issues with many of these people. It’s not some small minority that will cause problems.

      1. I still can’t get over the hilarity of all these people thinking that moving to Germany… FUCKING GERMANY!… was a smart move.

        It should have literally been the last country on the entire list to go be a religious minority in. That shit doesn’t just disappear because the war’s over.

        1. They became friendlier to Muslims…around 1933.

          1. Or to be fair, in WWI when they persuaded the Ottomans that a German alliance would be a really bright idea.

          2. I suppose you might be more inclined to move to Germany as a religious minority if you believe their historic transgressions are a hoax.

        2. Europe in general isn’t really tolerant, and none of this is going to end well for the Muslims.

        3. Germany has the very generous welfare. That’s why they don’t want to stop in Italy.

      2. Cologne is lousy with pickpockets and aggressive beggars, and been lousy with them for a long time. I wouldn’t be surprised if some (but not all) of the sexual assaults reported last year were a combination of mass hysteria with pickpockets and beggars working the crowd.

  128. “I hate racism. #Virtuesignalling2017dropsmic”

    My only FB post this New Years. I got about 20 likes and many comments about the evils of racism. My sarcasm just can’t penetrate the the skulls of my progressive friends.

    1. You’re so woke that you pass beyond sarcasm into Platonic Truth.

      1. Parody is rendered impotent when you’ve reached that level of woke.

  129. You’ll get your fingers chopped off.

  130. 1,000+

    How long until they shake off their hangovers and post something new?

    1. tomorrow AM. probably whomever is lowest on the totem pole. Robby or Boomer.

  131. The case for “reasonable” gun control, proggy-office-losing version:

    “Chicago’s 762 homicides in 2016 is highest in 19 years”
    http://www.cnn.com/2017/01/01/…..index.html

    Obviously, they weren’t all shootings, so let’s discount the ones that were avoided by the draconian gun laws and just count shootings rather than homicides.
    OK: “The city saw a surge in gun violence in 2016: 762 murders, 3,550 shooting incidents, and 4,331 shooting victims, according to a statement released by the department on Sunday. ”
    Ooops! I guess they were *all* not prevented by those “reasonable” gun restrictions after all. I guess we need stronger gun laws and (hee, hee, hee,) that hag for president!

    1. “Well, if we’re going to repeal gun control, why not just legalize murder?”

      -every idiot I talk to about this

    2. you probably know this already, but it can’t be said enough, “gun laws are only for the law abiding.”

  132. I leave this comment for the commentarariat. There has been an awful lot of bitching about the year of 2016. Since it is over, I will give my opinion.

    I finally crossed into the 6 figure income bracket this year. my little boy turned 4 and my marriage turned 5, all with very little trouble. I payed my land off. My parents are healthy, for the first time in a few years. Nobody I know personally died this year. There was a change in government that may or may not be for the better, who the fucks knows. All in all, 2016 has been one of the best years of my life.

    For all those shedding tears for laments that are outside of your control, take a step back and look at what you have achieved personally in the previous year, and judge 2016 on that, instead of things outside of your control

    1. 2016 was a good year for me. I have a job I like, had a girlfriend, have nice nest egg, and am in good shape and good health.

      Death camp survivor Viktor Frankl said: if you have a good answer for “why?”, you can get by with any answer to “how?”

      I think that’s the key to happiness.

      1. good stuff my man. glad to hear you’re squared away

        1. Glad both of you are doing well.

      2. Another quote from a death camp survivor,

        And how we burned in the camps later, thinking: What would things have been like if every Security operative, when he went out at night to make an arrest, had been uncertain whether he would return alive and had to say good-bye to his family? Or if, during periods of mass arrests, as for example in Leningrad, when they arrested a quarter of the entire city, people had not simply sat there in their lairs, paling with terror at every bang of the downstairs door and at every step on the staircase, but had understood they had nothing left to lose and had boldly set up in the downstairs hall an ambush of half a dozen people with axes, hammers, pokers, or whatever else was at hand?… The Organs would very quickly have suffered a shortage of officers and transport and, notwithstanding all of Stalin’s thirst, the cursed machine would have ground to a halt! If…if…We didn’t love freedom enough. And even more ? we had no awareness of the real situation…. We purely and simply deserved everything that happened afterward.

        Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn

        1. That quote is a powerful argument for the 2nd Amendment

          1. agreed. reading books on soviet history is what opened my eyes to the dangers of collectivism.

            I read “the gulag archipelago” when I was sixteen. That book is a greater argument for individualism than anything ayn rand, Milton freidman, or Henry bastiat ever wrote. IMHO.

            1. That book is a greater argument for individualism than anything ….

              meh… shorter is generally the better-argument, and Alex S. is anything but….

              i think few people would actually appreciate S. without first digesting some of the political thought that predated that horrorshow.

              i read ‘Gulag’ in college (not for any reason, just because it was there)… but i think the book which most seared ‘stalinism’ in my mind was actually Koba The Dread by Martin Amis… which is less about ‘what actually happened’ w/ stalin, but more about “Why he was ALLOWED to happen, and afterwards apologized for, by so many in the West”

        2. I love that quote. I never tire of telling so-called liberals that the main topic of conversation for fresh gulag prisoners was “why didn’t we fight back?”

    2. I didn’t find 2016 particularly shitty – my candidate of choice lost again, we got what will likely be a bad president, as I was expecting even before Trump ended up winning, a bunch of celebrities passed, as happens every year.

      My impression of all the “2016 was the worst evar!” are folks on the Left who were blindsided by their “inevitable” candidate losing – if that’s all it takes to mark a nadir in one’s life, they’ve have incredibly easy lives to this point.

      1. Also, mazel tov on your 2016 milestones.

        1. And L’chaim!

      2. “if that’s all it takes to mark a nadir in one’s life, they’ve have incredibly easy lives to this point.”

        I live in San Francisco. On the rare times I’ve voted for a candidate, that candidate has never won. And these wimps are whining because that miserable excuse for a human being, let alone a presidential candidate didn’t win?
        If that makes your year a loss, you deserve to lose very year! Along with your miserable excuse for a human being.

        1. I think that if one ties their emotional stability to the fortunes of a politician, then one is in a bad place to start from.

          Whoever won the election on 2016 wasn’t going to fuck up my year. period.

  133. RoboTrump
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6syBuK4a79M

    PRIME DIRECTIVES

    1. BUILD THE WALL

    2. DRAIN THE SWAMP

    3. MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN

    1. My hopes for trump are threefold.

      1. repealing as many free market restrictions health care laws as possible.

      2. Lower the corporate income tax as much as possible.

      3. Lessen Fed Gov abc regulations as much as possible.

      I doubt this will happen, but a man can hope can’t he?

    2. Good one!

  134. Aaron Rodgers girlfriend. Why do people keep saying these words? He has a girlfriend but just happens to live with a buddy…for years now.

    Come on, what is this, 2016?

  135. A visit to far So Cal gets me the LA Times for breakfast amusement and there are articles on the front page about how the US cannot survive without Mexican farmworkers (which is bullshit for many reasons), an article in the bizz section predicting a Dow Jones fall (regarding which the writer ought to have bought caution low from Krugman, but decided to buy high long after *that* market tanked) and then this:

    “In no particular order, we fervently wish for:
    ? An end to the war in Syria and to the suffering of millions of displaced Syrians, and the collapse of the brutal Islamic State army with as little further bloodshed as possible.(thanks Obo!)
    ? Recognition by Trump that real presidents don’t tweet diatribes that are hastily conceived, reckless, petty or misspelled.(No, they write laws at lunch on Friday and have some functionary publish them via email)
    (Most (not all) of the rest is equally partisan, but we get this:)
    ? A narrowing of the social and political divisions exposed and exacerbated in the 2016 presidential campaign, and a national discourse in which facts become less malleable things.
    (So long as you agree with me, we want agreement!)
    http://www.latimes.com/opinion…..story.html

    1. we fervently wish for:
      ? An end to the war in Syria

      Maybe shipping bazillions of $ in weaponry into the country is less than the best-idea? Oh well, too late now to complain! let’s blame the orange-haired guy

      1. My favorite Syria screw-up: Pentagon-trained rebels fighting CIA-trained rebels.

        Runner-up: both of them selling/losing thousands of anti-tank missiles to ISIS.

        Imagine a major city decided they would fight crime by giving guns to homeless people. It’s kind of like that.

      2. I encourage others to please parse that list.
        I use yellow sticky ‘tails’ rather than marginal notes for comments on book pages, and you’ll need the same; there is not space enough on the page to point out the obvious mendacity of most all the “wishes”.
        The SF Chron is certainly worse, but that’s a very low bar.

        1. I do enjoy, at some level, the Cali pants-shitting over “who will do these jobs if not illegals?” – my overwhelming impression is, yes, the farmworkers thing is legit but what a huge number of people really fear is having to cut their own goddamn lawns and clean their own houses. As a Bostonian, I’m always amazed at how many Californians take those things for granted – they’re something of a luxury here.

          1. Somehow, the US fed itself before the flood of illegals. How did we manage? Temporary workers and college students.

            1. College students on average are shitty labourers that will quit after day 1 and call mommy to pick them up. It’s a pipe dream to assume born and bred domestics could fill the void of a deportation effort 10x the current one. The shock to food pricing would be a calamity.

              At any rate, I’m pretty sure Trump isn’t going to do anything new or special with border jumpers. Immigration reform that makes guest farm labour visits easy would be welcome IMO, though if they all have to hit the employment rolls and all need to be paid California’s hilarious minimum wage….. :-)))

        2. I think it’s great that Obama and Trump will have twitter wars like catty teenagers.

    2. I hope “Real presidents don’t …” becomes a meme. Put that meme under a smirking Willy Wonka pic and you’ve got yourself a zinger.

      1. You provoked me,,,

        Real Presidents

      2. With the Willy Wonka..

        Real Presidents

  136. My New Year’s Resolutions:

    1) Only post in fresh threads

    2) Stop presenting things in list form

    3) Stop changing screen-names

      1. The D.E.N.N.I.S. System never fails.

  137. You could put a chair on any public sidewalk in Tokyo, leave for 5 minutes and when you get back there’d be a lady over 80 sitting on it with a facial expression screaming, “I’m just gonna sit here for a couple hours”.

  138. I’ve managed to be drunk, sleep, wake up hungover, get drunk again, sleep, wake up a little hungover and start on the sake again. All done while posting on the most recent Reason thread. What’s the record?

    1. Hangovers only happen to people who make the foolish mistake of stopping to drink.
      -New Orleans saying

      Drink your self sober! In Keynesian economics, it’s called stimulating aggregate demand.

      1. Well, Chapman just saved my liver. *Sigh*

        1. What am I missing? Still don’t see a new post.

          1. You have Chapman blocked? Didn’t know you could do that.

            1. Ah, tricksy hobbitses, I now see how you see the new posts before they hit the /blog link.

              1. So that’s how Fist does it. The newest articles show up in the archives before the show up on HnR.

      2. Jeez, Straff. Happy for you here.

        I don’t understand why my in-laws became near teetotalers over the past year or two. I used to get blasted during Oshogatsu at their prodding but now things have taken a nearly Brady Bunch tone with them.

    2. Yep, I’m on round 2 for getting crunk’d with this one thread as well (I haven’t been at work since the 21st, not back until the 3rd).

    3. What’s the record?

      You really don’t want to know the answer to this question, because its horrifying.

      1. Salvation is at hand.

  139. You cannot go to San Diego without visiting the zoo.
    It has gotten worse:
    1) Entirely too much visual clutter; cutesy signs with cutesy names in Hasbro toy colors blocking the views of the flora and fauna.
    2) Some of the enclosures have reverted to cages; not enough space for the animal to avoid stress. The Jaguar and the Maned Wolf were both painful to watch; spending the time we spent looking pacing back and forth and back and forth and back and forth.
    3) The heaping helping of propaganda: Did you know that if each of us were to car pool just one day a week, it would make a huge difference?
    4) More propaganda, equally un-examined.
    Bus driver: (all commentary requires exclamation point) “These are my favorite birds! They have wing spans of 9′! There were only 22 of them left! We took them all out of the wild! We spent millions! There are now 400, 200 are in the wild!”
    No one asked why keeping Condors around is worth millions.
    I guess I coulda and gotten rid outa town on a rail…

    1. You cannot go to San Diego without visiting the zoo.

      I have – in and out for Red Sox vs. Padres. In retrospect, I wish I spent more time in that town.

    1. Damn that balloon cry was just amazing! Thank you!

  140. the latter one =

    that’s not in the US is it? the police gear looks… eastern european?

    also the comments section seems convinced that the video is misleading (and i’m always pointing out that “Argument by video clip” is bullshit)… because offscreen to the left is when someone sprays the girl with pepper spray, just as he takes the balloon.

    1. There is another version of the video where it sounds like they’re speaking French and there is no shrieking.
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=973J7DqPTFo

      1. Looks like the French “Compagnies R?publicaines de S?curit?” facing protesters.

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