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Prosecutors

How Government Stifled Reason's Free Speech

Yes, the feds can compel magazines and websites to cough up user information about obviously non-threatening trolls, while barring them from even acknowledging it.

Nick Gillespie and Matt Welch | 6.19.2015 5:08 PM

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For the past two weeks, Reason, a magazine dedicated to "Free Minds and Free Markets," has been barred by an order from the U.S. District Court for the Southern District of New York from speaking publicly about a grand jury subpoena that court sent to Reason.com.

The subpoena demanded the records of six people who left hyperbolic comments at the website about the federal judge who oversaw the controversial conviction of Silk Road founder Ross Ulbricht. Shortly after the subpoena was issued, the government issued a gag order prohibiting Reason not only from discussing the matter but even acknowledging the existence of the subpoena or the gag order itself. As a wide variety of media outlets have noted, such actions on the part of the government are not only fundamentally misguided and misdirected, they have a tangible chilling effect on free expression by commenters and publications alike.

Yesterday, after preparing an extensive legal brief, Reason asked the US Attorney's Office to join with it in asking that the gag order - now moot and clearly an unconstitutional prior restraint - be lifted. This morning, the US Attorney's Office asked the Court to vacate the order, which it did. We are free to tell the story for the first time.

On May 31, Nick Gillespie published a post at Reason.com's Hit & Run blog discussing Silk Road founder Ross Ulbricht's "haunting sentencing letter" to District Court Judge Katherine Forrest, and the judge's harsh response. Gillespie noted that Forrest "more than threw the book" at Ulbricht by giving him a life sentence, which was a punishment "beyond even what prosecutors…asked for."

In the comments section of the post, six readers published reactions that drew the investigative ire of the U.S. Attorney's Office for the Southern District of New York. In a federal grand jury subpoena dated June 2, the U.S. District Court commanded Reason.com to turn over "any and all identifying information" we had about the individuals posting those comments.

This is the first time Reason.com has received such a subpoena from any arm of government.

From press accounts of similar actions at other news publications and social media sites, we know that it is increasingly common for the federal government to demand user information from publications and websites while also stifling their speech rights with gag orders and letters requesting "voluntary" confidentiality. Exactly how common is anyone's guess; we are currently investigating just how widespread the practice may be.

The federal government's command for information—and request for silence—ironically came just days after the Supreme Court, in Elonis v. United States, strongly limited the scope of what counts as a true "threat" online. In that case, the Court voided the conviction of Anthony Elonis, who had published on Facebook rap lyrics depicting violence against his estranged wife and as a result been sentenced to 44 months in prison for making threats. The Court ruled that context needs to be taken into account when evaluating the true nature of the threatening actions being described. "Federal criminal liability," the justices wrote, "generally does not turn solely on the results of an act without considering the defendant's mental state."

Unfortunately, that precedent is mostly irrelevant in our case. In America, grand juries have almost limitless ability to investigate whatever they want, regardless of whether that investigation has any chance of producing a constitutionally permissible conviction. Grand juries are widely regarded as playthings of ambitious prosecutors, who famously are able to indict "ham sandwiches"—at least, as long as those sandwiches aren't police officers accused of brutality.

U.S. Attorney Preet Bharara subpoenaed all of the identifying information we had about the authors of such comments as, "Its (sic) judges like these that should be taken out back and shot." And, "Why waste ammunition? Wood chippers get the message across clearly. Especially if you feed them in feet first." This last comment is a well-known Internet reference to the Coen brothers' movie Fargo.  

The subpoena also covered such obviously harmless comments as: "I hope there is a special place in hell reserved for that horrible woman," and "I'd prefer a hellish place on Earth be reserved for her as well."

The comments are hyperbolic, in questionable taste–and fully within the norms of Internet commentary.

It's worth stressing that, under established legal precedent, Reason.com (like any other website) is generally not legally responsible for reader comments posted at our site. Still, the chilling effect on Reason and our commenters is tangible. It takes time, money and resources to challenge, or even simply to comply with, such intrusive demands.

The original subpoena, received late on Tuesday, June 2, did not come with a gag order. However, it came with a letter from Bharara and Assistant U.S. Attorney Niketh Velamoor requesting that we refrain from informing any other parties about the subpoena so as to "preserve the confidentiality of the investigation," and that we notify his office in advance if we intended to do so, even though it also said that we were under "no obligation" to keep the subpoena confidential.

We had three options: We could 1) abide quietly with the subpoena, 2) attempt to quash it, and/or 3) alert the commenters named in the subpoena.

Option 1, quietly abiding, was a non-starter for us.

As for Option 2, our chances of prevailing in that sort of legal challenge—given the extremely wide-ranging authority of federal grand juries, and the precedents set in cases such as In re Grand Jury Subpoena No. 11116275, 846 F. Supp. 2d 1 (D.D.C. 2012), involving an anonymous poster on Twitter—was in practical effect, virtually nil.  

In the Twitter case, an anonymous poster moved to quash a grand jury subpoena to Twitter that arose from online postings of a sexual nature about then-congresswoman Michele Bachmann. In that case, Twitter received the subpoena and notified the anonymous poster about it, letting him know that the company would comply with the subpoena unless he filed a motion to quash. The court denied his motion, holding that the poster's First Amendment right to comment anonymously must yield to the government's "compelling interest" in knowing his identity. 

So we decided, against the government's request but well within our legal rights, to choose Option 3: notify and share the full subpoena with the six targeted commenters so that they would have a chance to assert their First Amendment rights to anonymity and defend themselves legally against the order.

At about 10:30 am ET on Thursday, June 4, our attorney Gayle Sproul (of Levine, Sullivan, Koch, & Schulz) called Velamoor to discuss the subpoena. The call did not go well. Sproul asked Velamoor to consider scaling back the scope of the subpoena by omitting the more benign commenters. Velamoor said simply, "No." Then Sproul informed him that we would be notifying our commenters about the subpoena to give them the chance to defend their rights to remain anonymous, and that we would not comply with the subpoena as it related to any commenters who moved to quash the subpoena before our compliance deadline. Sproul explained to him that there is case law firmly establishing that these commenters have the right to speak anonymously, and that we would withhold the information of anyone fighting the subpoena. Velamoor disputed that any such free speech rights exist. He asked that we delay notifying the commenters so he could get a court order prohibiting us from disclosing the subpoena to them. We refused. Sproul pointed out that we were perfectly within our rights to share the subpoena given the law and the wording of his own letter. Velamoor then suggested that Reason was "coming close" to interfering with the grand jury investigation. The call ended abruptly.

Immediately following that conversation (at about 11:00 am ET on June 4), Reason Publisher Mike Alissi sent the subpoena to the six email addresses associated with the user accounts for the comments identified in the subpoena. The email stated:

I am unhappy to report that Reason has received the attached grand jury subpoena from the US District Court/Southern District of New York demanding that we provide all identifying information that we have for several commenters who posted comments in a recent Reason.com thread about the Silk Road case.  I am writing you because your email address is associated with one or more of the comments at issue. 

Please be aware that we must provide the information that is being demanded by June 9 at 10 am eastern.   Please let us know no later than Monday, June 8 at 5 pm eastern if you have filed any motion(s) with the Court opposing the grand jury subpoena. Our attorney has notified the US Attorney's Office that we are notifying you about this subpoena.

Later that day, at approximately 5:35 pm ET, Velamoor sent Reason a gag order he had later secured blocking us from discussing the subpoena or the order itself with anyone outside of Reason, other than our attorney.

The gag order was accompanied by this email:

Mr. Alissi,

Regarding this subpoena, I spoke to someone who said she was an attorney representing Reason in connection with this subpoena.  The attorney indicated that Reason intended to notify the individuals referenced therein about the subpoena.  The attorney further refused to provide me any time to take steps to protect the confidentiality of the investigation. 

I have obtained the attached Court Order prohibiting Reason from notifying any third party about the subpoena.

Please forward the Order to the attorney and any other individuals who should be aware of it.

Thank you

Niketh V. Velamoor
Assistant United States Attorney
Southern District of New York
One Saint Andrew's Plaza
New York, NY  10007

(Sproul had identified herself and provided contact information to him.)

Since receipt of the gag order on June 4, and until this moment, Reason has not spoken with any outside parties about the subpoena or the gag order. We originally intended to publish the subpoena as part of a Reason.com story about it after the reply deadline; unfortunately, the gag order put those plans on ice.

Having already suggested that Reason might have interfered with a grand jury investigation, Velamoor contacted Sproul on the afternoon of Friday, June 5, in response to a letter from her explaining the commenters' constitutional rights and laying out the timeline of Reason's notification to them. Velamoor told her that he now had "preliminary information" suggesting that Reason was in violation of the court order. Sproul said we were not and asked for further information. Velamoor refused to give any specifics, saying simply that he was "looking into it further."

So as of this point in the saga, Reason had been subpoenaed, we had been vaguely—and falsely—accused by a United States Attorney's office of actions verging on obstruction of justice and contempt of court, and we were now told that we were being investigated further.

None of the six commenters informed us that they would be filing motions to oppose the U.S. Attorney's subpoena. Therefore we complied with the subpoena on the deadline of June 9.

Providing the subpoena to the commenters before the gag order was issued is what presumably enabled it to become public. That has had the effect of bringing to light what these compulsory grabs for information look like, launching a wide number of conversations about a grand jury process in which the government can target individuals, platforms, and publications for data about users.

(For a relatively comprehensive list of coverage of the matter go to this post at the legal blog Popehat, which published the first article on the subpoena and its implications.)

Reason's experience needs to be understood in a larger context. Especially since the 9/11 attacks, there has been a mounting conflict between the values of free speech and constitutional due process, with government making increasing demands–often under threat of punishment–for all sorts of information from innocent citizens. Coupled with the rise of a secretive and pervasive surveillance state, this tension means that Americans have no way of knowing just how unfree their speech really is.

While it is impossible to fully ascertain the frequency of information requests from local, state, and federal law enforcement, there is every reason to believe websites are subjected to thousands of demands each year. It is also not clear how other websites interpret the type of letter requesting "voluntary" confidentiality that Reason received. How often is that letter sent along with subpoenas? And how often does it achieve its intended effect of securing silence? In other words, does it have the same effect as a gag order?

In 2013, for instance, Mother Jones reported that Google, Facebook, Twitter, and Microsoft have between them received "tens of thousands of requests for user data from the US government annually," covering hundreds of thousands of accounts. Using corporate transparency reports, the magazine estimated that the companies complied with the demands between 72 percent and 89 percent of the time, and that it's impossible to know how many of those requests were filled without the affected users ever knowing their information had been targeted.

Also confusing the discussion about these orders is that different categories of cases have different rules and procedures, with some granting more power to targets than others. "Unlike grand jury subpoenas, subpoenas for commenter information in civil cases and in public criminal prosecutions are easier for websites to deflect. The information sought there may be truly tangential and the parties may be willing to negotiate," Sproul told Reason. "But, as in this case, when a grand jury subpoena targets specific information that it contends is necessary to an investigation and can demonstrate the link, any fight is going to be a seriously uphill battle." 

Regardless of the legal details, the growing government demand for user data and our own experience with court-enforced silence on a self-evidently ridiculous investigation raise important questions about free speech and the abuse of power.

Reason's unmoderated comment space is rare among comparable publications and has, over the years, developed into a forum that is by turns exciting, intellectually advanced, outlandish, cringe-inducing, and more foul-mouthed than any locker room this side of the Crab Nebula. It is something to be celebrated as a voluntary community that can be engaged or ignored as the spirit moves you (we say that as writers whose work and physical shortcomings rarely escape unscathed from any thread). However trollish many of our commenters can be, they have created a sphere of free speech that delivers on one of the great promises of the Internet, which is unbridled expression, dialogue, and argument.

We took risks by creating an autonomous zone in which our readers are left to their own devices. Some of the risk is reputational—how many other serious outlets allow anonymous commenters to run riot as we do? Some of the risk is legal, as in the current situation.

One further note about anonymity in our comment threads. Commenting on our site requires registration using a working email address (which is hidden from public view unless a commenter chooses to have it displayed). We also log IP addresses. We do both of these things in order to fight spammers and trolls–people who have shown enormous determination in their efforts to disrupt the discussion. 

Our commenters are generally a tech-savvy bunch. It is likely that those who have a desire for a very high degree of anonymity are taking control of that themselves, using anonymous email addresses and tools to prevent us from logging IPs connected to them.

But Reason.com is not the dark web. Many of our regular commenters voluntarily display either personal website information or their email addresses. In fact, three of the six commenters subject to this very subpoena voluntarily displayed public links to personal blogs at Blogger as part of their comments, one of which further links to a Google+ page. Raising the question: How can the government view these so-called "threats" as so nefarious when people posted them in such a non-anonymous fashion? 

Due in part to the government's secrecy and possible gag orders or requests for "voluntary" confidentiality, we don't know whether Google or other media outlets have been subpoenaed in this particular case. Judge Forrest's sentencing and comments in the Silk Road trial have drawn widespread criticism in corners of the Internet that value privacy and oppose the ruinous drug war. The potential number of critical comments subject to the District Court's low bar for investigative compulsion is enormous. Now multiply that number by the number of controversial court cases, and you could quickly get to the point where federal courts were doing nothing but investigating online trolls. Surely there are more pressing tasks, ones that don't involve suppressing the speech of journalistic outlets known to be critical of government overreach.

Reason's guiding principle over 47 years has been to expand the legal and cultural space for free expression, as the bedrock value behind human flourishing. As libertarians who believe in "Free Minds and Free Markets," Reason takes seriously an obligation to our audience and to our critics not simply to hold on to what we've got but to increase the rights of everyone to speak openly and without figurative or literal prior restraint.

To live in a world where every stray, overheated Internet comment—however trollish and stupid it may be—can be interpreted as an actionable threat to be investigated by a federal grand jury is to live in a world where the government is telling the public and media to just shut up already. As we gather and publish more information on just how often this sort of thing happens, we pledge to always be on the side of more speech rather than less. 

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NEXT: How Confederate-flag GOP Presidential Politics in South Carolina Have Changed…for the Better

Nick Gillespie is an editor at large at Reason and host of The Reason Interview With Nick Gillespie.

Matt Welch is an editor at large at Reason.

ProsecutorsRoss UlbrichtPoliceFree Speech
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  1. Brochettaward   10 years ago

    First. Woodchippers.

    1. JCDavis   10 years ago

      The Cohen brothers actually put the head in first and hammered on the feet with a 2x4. But an expert at delivering pain like Cheney would likely put the feet in first and hammer on the head, so let's go with that image.

      1. PapayaSF   10 years ago

        Coen bothers.

        1. PapayaSF   10 years ago

          Ha! Brothers.

          1. MSimon   10 years ago

            And props to 7:01. And Popehat. And a hat tip to

            Fusion Hat which had nothing to do with it.

            1. MSimon   10 years ago

              And I probably should add

              Fusion Facehat.

              1. Don'tTreadOnMeChipper   10 years ago

                7:01 will be remembered in history as the unleashing of the Libertarian Moment....

      2. Suicidy   10 years ago

        Cheney? Oh, I forgot, a lot of you are all twisted up because allowed the CIA to water on some foreign murdering Muslim's face for a few minutes and didn't let them sleep for awhile. Because that's the same.

        1. Quixote   10 years ago

          Come now, these insidious comments posted on Reason were not mere "hyperbole," any more than the criminally deceitful emails sent by a "satirist" in New York were mere poor efforts at parody or blustery expressions of anger. See the documentation of America's leading criminal satire case at:

          http://raphaelgolbtrial.wordpress.com/

          And, lest the point of my remark be misunderstood, I believe it is worth reminding "freedom of speech" bloggers like Popehat and Volokh (and Gillespie and Welch and all the others) that when we don't stand up for everyone's rights, we should not be surprised when our own rights end up getting trampled on with big black boots.

          1. Gary T   10 years ago

            "First they came for the socialists . . ."

            Now the socialists are coming for the libertarians.

            https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/First_they_came_...

        2. mulp   10 years ago

          Cheney is the most aggressive advocate for spying on Americans and for doing so in complete secrecy hidden even from members of Congress.

      3. Brochettaward   10 years ago

        For anyone just starting to read the comments, I suggest this:
        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0LD57c1KuA8

        9 hours of industrial wood chipper sounds to set the mood.

        1. Hans von Woodchipperberge   10 years ago

          Lmfao

        2. Patches O'Houlihan   10 years ago

          Thanks, that really helped me get a good day's sleep.

        3. Vincent Milburn   10 years ago

          Is this supposed to make us horny?

          1. Brochettaward   10 years ago

            It wasn't not not supposed to make you horny.

      4. AD-RtR/OS!   10 years ago

        Nice alliteration, but I doubt if Dick Cheney has ever been within 100-yds of an industrial wood chipper. Or, were you referring to some other Cheney?

        1. Carolynp   10 years ago

          I'd take that bet. Cheney was a working electrician for most of his life, not a soft fingered lawyer.

          1. Peter Duncan   10 years ago

            Bullshit! He was never a lawyer as he majored in political science and draft dodging during college. He's been a damn woodchipping bureaucrat his entire adult life.

    2. C. Anacreon   10 years ago

      600 comments to read? No need to get a newspaper for my flight home in 15 minutes. Hope it's not just John and Bo arguing.

      1. Chumby   10 years ago

        Bo doesn't argue, he educates!

        1. JPyrate   10 years ago

          Boring Bo is a fucking shitstain on the underwear of civilized society. =)

  2. MJGreen - Docile Citizen   10 years ago

    Should've saved this post for another hour and 53 minutes.

    This is all ridiculous and infuriating. It looks like you all handled this as best as you could. I would like to say some things about this Velamoor character, but I don't want to get you in any more trouble.

    1. Los Federales   10 years ago

      Just don't come dangerously close to tarnishing Velamoor's reputation.

      1. Mad Scientist   10 years ago

        He's doing a fine job all by himself.

        1. Charles Easterly   10 years ago

          Indeed.

        2. croaker   10 years ago

          He's the AUSA version of Nickelback.

          1. A special place in JW's Hell   10 years ago

            That's just mean.

            1. SimonJester   10 years ago

              To Nickleback, and that is saying something.

        3. ThomasD   10 years ago

          Definitely do not want to put him in a woodchipper. Having cement for brains it could prove harmful to the woodchipper.

          And woodchippers are valuable.

          Unlike pompous petty black robed tyrants.

        4. Migrant Log Chipper   10 years ago

          ++1, Kafka

        5. AD-RtR/OS!   10 years ago

          He's in fine company with that poor excuse of a judge.

      2. Tionico   10 years ago

        his WHAT??!!??

    2. mr lizard   10 years ago

      This mammal named Velamoor does exhibit the blatant overbearing control tendencies characteristic for Your Future Reptilian Overlords. However his lack of foresight in neglecting to obtain a gag order first marks him as a piddling amateur.

      1. Jimbo   10 years ago

        Exactly. What a loser! (Hear that Vela-Less?)

      2. Suthenboy   10 years ago

        Oh, it is more than that. In addition to his blunders he clearly does not know the law.

        1. He is a bumbling idiot who can't cut it in private practice and so got a government job where he can get by with hyperbole, bluster, and bullying.

        or

        2. He actually does know the law and how bad this action was and so deliberately sabotaged it.

        Y'all decide which you think is more likely.

        1. Whahappantomychipper?   10 years ago

          I'll go with

          3. He's a dishonest, dishonorable oathbreaker who counts on a corrupt system to further his evil.

    3. Chumby   10 years ago

      What if each of us sent a letter to the New York Bar Association asking him to be disbarred?

      1. MarkLastname   10 years ago

        He'd probably get a promotion.

      2. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

        Proles asking for a prosecutor to be disbarred is,like fanfic to those people. They'd probably masturbate (furiously) to it.

        1. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

          I mean, is there any other way to masturbate?

          1. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

            You sir have no sense of style or decorum.

  3. Los Federales   10 years ago

    Velamoor sounds like a right cunt. That is all.

    1. IceTrey   10 years ago

      You are now under investigation. So am I for telling you that you are under investigation.

      1. Suicidy   10 years ago

        I'm sure that we're all wired for sound by now. These guys are almost as dangerous as the phone cops.

        https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=cTPzTG1Lx60

    2. Chip Dalasio   10 years ago

      Just remember - shit flows downhill. If Preet Bharara, Velamoor's boss didn't accept such behavior, Valemoor would not have engaged in it.

      1. Suicidy   10 years ago

        Voldemort has a boss? Is it Count Dooku? Palpatine? Davros? The Terrible Zodin?

        Maybe this prick should quit and go into private practice. I hear Wolfram & Hart are hiring.

        1. McKenna   10 years ago

          Is it bad that that's exactly what I was thinking about Wolfram and Hart?

        2. Chip Dalasio   10 years ago

          Nah. I think even they have more integrity than these bastards are showing.

          Besides, when they push evil, they do it in a way that makes them look like something more than third rate shitweasels.

        3. Carolynp   10 years ago

          He works for the feds. His boss is probably closer to Barney than any of the illustrious group you've named. I understand that those guys actually want their minions to be effective and useful.

      2. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

        They are both slimy pieces of shit. Fuck them and fuck the government.

    3. Vapourwear   10 years ago

      A sandy one...

  4. Episiarch   10 years ago

    Reason's commitment to free expression and an open and unmoderated discussion is impressive and admirable. It really is. And that's a major reason why a lot of us are here. That and NutraSweet's slashfic. So keep it up, guys, and thanks.

    1. Almanian - Wood Chipper-ish   10 years ago

      ...aaaaaaaaaaand the technical discussions regarding wood chippers.

      And Lobster Girl.

      1. Episiarch   10 years ago

        Don't forget about your mom. I sure don't.

        1. mr lizard   10 years ago

          Your mother was quite accommodating in her day

      2. EDG chippin' WUD   10 years ago

        Also, fried chicken.

        1. Pi Guy   10 years ago

          I miss Wylie (or was that the Penguin?)

          1. Fission Chips   10 years ago

            Mmmmm.. Fried penguin.

            1. Tionico   10 years ago

              smells fishy to me.....

      3. In League with the Dark Ones   10 years ago

        Lobster Girl has a challenger...

    2. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

      I agree with Epi's statement, except I would substitute "meet chicks" for "NutraSweet's slashfic."

      1. Episiarch   10 years ago

        At a certain point, they are essentially the same thing. A horrible, profoundly demented point.

        1. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

          Thanks for leaving the well-reasoned and succinct message that I was not able to formulate.

      2. Warty   10 years ago

        How much fucking has happened because of H&R? At least two married couples and a bunch of other relationships. How many political blogs can claim that?

        1. Medical Physics Guy   10 years ago

          a bunch of other relationships

          go on...

          1. Lady Dalrymple   10 years ago

            TIWTANFL

          2. Tonio the Plant Fiber Shredder   10 years ago

            Well, there is my stalker-creepy obsession with Eddie.

            1. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

              Keep reaching for that rainbow...

          3. Limpee Wiltstock   10 years ago

            mostly gay

          4. Bobarian (Would Chip Her)   10 years ago

            a bunch of other relationships

            In a rape dungeon?

        2. gaoxiaen   10 years ago

          How much has been stopped by it? I write on sites like Facebook like I write here and everyone gets pissed off. It's like cursing when you get out of the military.

        3. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

          Shit, our third baby was born today. Without Reason that wouldn't have happened.

          I bet the mongoloids at HuffPo can't say that!

          1. Dark Lord of the wood chipper   10 years ago

            Who would fuck any of the sad creatures at HuffPo?

            Also, congratulations to you and Banjos.

          2. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

            Congrats.

          3. Lady Dalrymple   10 years ago

            Congratulations to you both. Now remember to bring her something delicious. Birthing real brings on an appetite.

            1. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

              There's a semi-famous deli next to the hospital where my wife gave birth 3x.

              I assume they picked the location for good reason.

              1. MSimon   10 years ago

                Doesn't the hospital get jealous about all the births at the deli?

                Reuben sammiches are famous for inducing labor - in my family.

                1. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

                  Mmm. Sodium nitrite.

          4. Troy Woodchipper   10 years ago

            Congratulations.

          5. Troy Woodchipper   10 years ago

            Wait, you didn't name your kid Shit, did you?

            1. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

              I didn't name her Shit. Or Preet. Or Niketh. Or any other vile word.

              We named her Justice Forall Sloopy Spicer.

              1. Bronwyn   10 years ago

                Congratulations!!

          6. Trials and Chippelations   10 years ago

            Congrats

            1. C. Anacreon   10 years ago

              Awesome! Congrats!

          7. Jimbo   10 years ago

            Did I miss the raffle to name your baby?

          8. DEG   10 years ago

            Congratulations!

          9. Pathogen   10 years ago

            "I bet the mongoloids at HuffPo can't say that!"

            But.. Do you really want them to say that? Do you really want them to "breed"? Multiply? Have you seen Idiocracy?

            1. rudehost   10 years ago

              Why shouldn't huffpo readers breed? Cross eyed toddlers with hooves are just adorable in a post apocalyptic nuclear wasteland kind of way.

          10. Agammamon   10 years ago

            Congratulations!

          11. Hayeksplosives   10 years ago

            Congratulations! And remember there's a nice cartoon version of Road to Serfdom (meant for GM workers during WWii) available online for free when she is that age.

          12. Tejicano   10 years ago

            Woo hoo! Number three! Congratulations!

          13. WoodchipperFocus(ed)   10 years ago

            Congrats

          14. Chip Dalasio   10 years ago

            Again, Congratulations!

        4. perlchpr   10 years ago

          Do we have to count what goes on in your basement?

        5. Juvenile Bluster   10 years ago

          I don't think what goes on in your basement with random Reason H&R commenters counts as a "relationship".

          1. Fission Chips   10 years ago

            Well, Stockholm Syndrome could be the Reason....

        6. Sudden   10 years ago

          That depends on whether Warren finally announces her candidacy....

        7. Paul.   10 years ago

          At least two married couples

          Feature or bug?

          1. Carolynp   10 years ago

            Mmmmm...might I suggest as a libertarian woman, I can't imagine a worse life than marrying a big government type. Wouldn't have lasted for me.

    3. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

      Yes. I know it's not the donation webathon, but I'm going right now to donate again.

      1. a better chipper   10 years ago

        I just got an unexpected bonus and was wondering what to do with some of it. Other than a little extra savings, Vegas, and a Minnesota Viking legacy brick, I'll set aside some for a Reason donation (which I've sadly never done before).

        As Sidney Blumenthal would say: Brava, Reason! Brava!

        1. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

          Take the kid to a waterpark. When it's time.

          After you do it, you won't want to do it again for awhile.

        2. Carolynp   10 years ago

          ^This.

    4. OldMexican   10 years ago

      And the "Bad Idea T-Shirt" girl who bends over ever so slightly so we can see her navel... from above..

    5. DEG   10 years ago

      Agreed. Thanks Reason!

    6. Brandybuck   10 years ago

      And the fact that if Warty is posting here he's probably not prowling my neighborhood.

      1. Peachy rex   10 years ago

        Reason has a mobile site. You know, just sayin'...

    7. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

      "Reason's commitment to free expression and an open and unmoderated discussion is impressive and admirable"

      Agreed. They are real Americans and true Patriots. Thank you Reason for your great contributions to freedom and liberty.

      1. block30   10 years ago

        Yes! Thank god Reason is standing up to the government! This is the scariest shit I've read in a while!! I'd like to see the mainstream media cover the shit out this story. With the names of our fine government attorneys who tell us that we don't understand what out 1st amendment rights really are.

    8. Chip Dalasio   10 years ago

      Count me in on the "thanks, guys". This is why, even when I don't agree, I'll be the first to acknowledge that the Reason is fighting the good fight.

  5. Almanian - Wood Chipper-ish   10 years ago

    PS Good on ya, guys. This whole episode just pissed me off. I've decided to at least double last year's contribution this year - PLUS start giving it IJ.

    Fuck the government at all levels*.

    *not meant literally, and in no way implying an actual threat to any individual, living or dead (Kinky!!)

    1. Warty   10 years ago

      I've decided to at least double last year's contribution this year

      Yes. Plus, I should have more money by the next begging season. Any place that tolerates me is a place that deserves support.

      1. Episiarch   10 years ago

        So when are you going to send me money for tolerating you? Huh?

        1. Warty   10 years ago

          Didn't you get my dick pics? Them shits is money, dawg. Check your spam filter.

      2. Suthenboy   10 years ago

        I thought it went like this: "I would never join a club that would have me".

    2. Scooby   10 years ago

      No, no, no. In the spirit of George Carlin and/or Lenny Bruce, unfuck the government at all levels!

      1. gaoxiaen   10 years ago

        Is that a "Don't think of an elephant "-type statement?

  6. Brochettaward   10 years ago

    Love the article, just wish the judge who signed off on this had also been named. Screw these people. All of them need to be removed from positions of authority where they can abuse their power. Vote them out, apply pressure. Launch public campaigns that reveal them for what they are.

    I love how they make 'requests' while saying please, but when asked for any courtesy back, they bluntly say no.

    1. Episiarch   10 years ago

      That's because they're thugs. That's why they got into the job.

      1. Chip Dalasio   10 years ago

        That's because they're thugs.

        Yup. The exact words that came to my mind while reading this were "schoolyard bully".

      2. perlchpr   10 years ago

        I've been informed that your use of this word means that you are a racist.

        1. Vincent Milburn   10 years ago

          It's true. The T-word is just as bad as the N-word.

    2. Christophe   10 years ago

      And I love how the "voluntary" non-disclosure turns into a gag order the instant the targeted institution gets uppity. It's a pretty effective way to reduce the number of official gag orders while maintaining nearly the same effectiveness.

      1. Pro Libertate   10 years ago

        It's instructive to see how much the government bullies people into compliance, regardless of the legality of what they're trying to force people to do. The process is a very serious weapon, especially when it can be wielded without fear of consequence.

        1. Tonio the Plant Fiber Shredder   10 years ago

          Shut your whore mouth, ProLib. There are consequences. An appointed-for-life federal judge might get a stern warning and talking-to from his/her chief judge. Why, I understand that they are sometimes even remonstrated. Remonstrated, ProLib. What more do you want? They're only human.

          1. Pro Libertate   10 years ago

            We should fight for our liberties every single day. You can't take a break, not with people like this who use their power for evil at every chance. Do you think they believed for one second that those comments were actual threats?

            1. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

              I bet you one of the cocksuckers are given a speech about bullying tonight somewhere.

              It takes a bully to know one, right?

              1. Pro Libertate   10 years ago

                The "best and brightest" was such a stupid thing to ever say about government. They're never that, barring brief and rare instances like the founding of the U.S. "Worse and dimmest" would be much closer to the truth.

                1. Pathogen   10 years ago

                  "Ruthless and ambitious" is probably a more apt platitude for describing the caliber of sociopath drawn to positions of unaccountable authority in government, largely due to their inability to effective command and/or produce in the private sector at any level more impressive than head usher and a porn theater. Cream rises to the top, I'm told.. dregs sink to complacent rest in the unaccountable bowels of the federal command and control structure, I guess.. Unaccountable status given as a nuanced courtesy to those of dubious intellect, and "special needs"..

                  1. Pro Libertate   10 years ago

                    Where we go wrong, even some of us, some of the time, is ever thinking of the government as the "top." It's often legalized theft and violence at the best of times. Now, it seems like that's virtually all it is.

                    1. Issue Ninja   10 years ago

                      Yes, I have been puzzled by the phrase 'Top Men' in its usage here. I have known gov employees and I have known top men, they are not the same people.

                    2. Chip Dalasio   10 years ago

                      It's a reference to this....

                      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fdjf4lMmiiI

                  2. croaker   10 years ago

                    Shit floats. That's all you need to know about government.

                    1. Suicidy   10 years ago

                      It does? The. Why are my turds always resting at the bottom of the bowl? Dear God! Are they plotting something down there?

                    2. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

                      The shit that sits in the bottom of rhe toliet are called prosecuters.

                    3. Pathogen   10 years ago

                      "It does? The. Why are my turds always resting at the bottom of the bowl? Dear God! Are they plotting something down there?"

                      That's because your liver packs superior firepower, and the will to triumph.. over residual fats, and oils.. Walk proudly, with your head held high..

                  3. Tejicano   10 years ago

                    I guess you've never had to pull the top off a septic tank. It's the big chunks that float to the top.

                2. Limpee Wiltstock   10 years ago

                  "stupidest and faggiest" is probably more truer, but, natheless, come on, mans, they just doing their job. Yall is a twisker too hard on them, I think.

            2. Fission Chips   10 years ago

              "Do you think they believed for one second that those comments were actual threats?"

              It doesn't matter to them.

          2. BuSab Agent   10 years ago

            I was remonstrated once....the emotional scars will last.... about 10 minutes. Maybe I should carry around a seat cushion for those 10 minutes, as an art project.

    3. Brochettaward   10 years ago

      Yup. They say please, but their demands aren't a request. Question, and they'll get one of the robed stooges to sign off on any ridiculous order they want that will force compliance or a prison cell.

    4. Jesuit Bukkake Bomb   10 years ago

      The judge is a coward.

    5. Rt. Hon. Judge Woodrow Chipper   10 years ago

      No different than "requesting" you pay income tax.

    6. Hurricane Eye   10 years ago

      Judge Maas?

    7. Suthenboy   10 years ago

      I wonder if the judge who signed off on all this shit is Forrest, the one who probably initiated the complaint.
      I wonder if that is some kind of conflict or ethical violation.

      1. Limpee Wiltstock   10 years ago

        I knew some folks who was subject to an outrageous search on basis of an open no-knock warrant, one which didn't even specify the places to be search nor what to be seized, signed not by the judge wielding a pen but by what was obviously a stamped signature. They afterwards filed a lawsuit against him, and the very same judge then issued an arrest warrant for them for intimidation of a federal judge (the lawsuit being the threatening act). What happened? They ended up in prison and I never heard of them again. So fuck conflict of interest, fuck legitimacy of threats, fuck it all to hell. They just doing their job. Don't make too much of it.

  7. Jordan   10 years ago

    Niketh Velamoor: you and your boss are thin-skinned, tyrannical pieces of shit.

    1. Seamus   10 years ago

      And deserve to...... oh, never mind.

      1. Judge Forrest's Clitdong   10 years ago

        ...be forced to wear a jumper emblazoned with the words "Federal Prosecutor" and thrown into the general population at Riker's?

        1. croaker   10 years ago

          That's too good for him. Put him in with the hard cases in SuperMax.

          1. Judge Forrest's Clitdong   10 years ago

            Ok, they can put him in an assless prison suit, tattoo "child fucker" on his forehead, and toss him in with a couple dozen Aryan Brotherhood lifers.

            1. croaker   10 years ago

              You say "tomato"...

              1. Limpee Wiltstock   10 years ago

                I say, "easy meat".

        2. BuSab Agent   10 years ago

          That would be appropriate. After jail is where you put legally innocent people before trial. And then Mr. Prosecutor should wait exactly as long as the longest any one else has waited for their trial. (I believe it's seven years and counting).

    2. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

      You forgot to add a big middle finger.

  8. Christophe   10 years ago

    Cue 1000+ comment thread.

    1. gaoxiaen   10 years ago

      Luckily for me, it's Saturday morning here. And, unbelievably, I'm not hung over.

      1. mr lizard   10 years ago

        I find your lack of buzz disturbing

        1. Florida Man   10 years ago

          I'm stepping awake from the whiskey...to drink rum. Ron Zacapa. Pretty good stuff.

          1. mr lizard   10 years ago

            Yes rum is a better way to respect your buzz. Whiskey is for sipping assholes.

            BTW I had to ditch my ridalin to keep up with all the commenting here.

            1. Chip Dalasio   10 years ago

              Whiskey is for sipping assholes.

              Sipping assholes.

              We really don't need to hear about your sex life.

  9. Brochettaward   10 years ago

    Don't forget the other piece of scum:
    http://www.justice.gov/usao-sdny/meet-us-attorney

    1. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

      What the fuck is wrong with his face? Is that why he has a chip on his shoulder?

      1. See Double You   10 years ago

        It's kind of wooden, isn't, what with the chip on his shoulder and everything.

        1. See Double You   10 years ago

          *it

          1. gaoxiaen   10 years ago

            +1 hand-carved epaulette

        2. Pathogen   10 years ago

          The plastic veneer masks the ageing, dysfunctional clockwork within..

      2. Charles Easterly   10 years ago

        Chip on his shoulder?

        I see what you did there.

      3. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

        He has hollow eyes like Odo on DS9. If only he turned into a bucket of goo every day, we could dump him in the sewer where he belongs.

        1. croaker   10 years ago

          Septic tank. That way he has to ooze himself out through the tile field.

    2. Fission Chips   10 years ago

      Did you read this!?? Crap, what a statist prick. "Oh. What's that? New York!? Never mind."

      /Latella

  10. Trials and Chipulations(Kevin)   10 years ago

    A disheartening look inside the petty, cowardly, small-mindedness endemic to the bureaucratic class.

    I hope there comes a point in each of these peoples' lives where they are able to reflect on who they are and what they've spent their lives doing, and feel some modicum of regret.

    *note to you who seek to misread my statement as a threat. It's not a threat, it's a sincere hope you have a small amount of humanity, self-respect, and courage and are able to step back and see how horrible a person you are.

    1. Dread Pirate Roberts   10 years ago

      Not bloody likely. These people are sociopaths.

    2. Trials and Chippelations   10 years ago

      Who do you think you are nearly stealing my handle?

      1. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

        Dude, it's Kevin.

        1. Trials and Chippelations   10 years ago

          Just kidding.

      2. Trials and Chipulations(Kevin)   10 years ago

        Holy shit what a crappy thing to do. You'd think that after almost 20 years of lurking here I wouldn't make a mistake like that.

        I'll switch over to something nobody else would think of like Thoreau or Joe or something like that.

        1. Feet First (Kevin)   10 years ago

          Better?

          1. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

            Kevin, you are kind of a dick, but that is okay. I respect it.*

            *My respect is actually a negative.

          2. Trials and Chippelations   10 years ago

            Feet First made me chuckle, but honestly don't feel like you need to change your handle. You clearly note that you're Kevin. I was just giving you a hard time.

            1. Feet First (Kevin)   10 years ago

              No worries at all. I had changed it while half in the bag during the great handle-changing of last week.

              Feet First has a certain abruptness to it. I think I'll keep it 🙂

            2. Tonio the Plant Fiber Shredder   10 years ago

              Get a room, girls.

              1. Trials and Chippelations   10 years ago

                There's room for one more 😉

                1. Fission Chips   10 years ago

                  How open minded are you?

                2. perlchpr   10 years ago

                  In the chipper?

      3. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

        E.? That you?

        1. Trials and Chippelations   10 years ago

          Yea. Trials and Trippelations was just too easy to make into a pun.

          1. Trials and Chippelations   10 years ago

            *to not make into a pun

            1. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

              Things have gotten so confusing since the woodchipper incident.

              1. Trials and Chippelations   10 years ago

                It takes a moment to sort out who is who, but I love the clever chipper handles

                1. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

                  All I had was a clever link.

                2. Agammamon   10 years ago

                  What we need is a handle history - like wot that Steam thing has.

              2. Sudden   10 years ago

                Some of us don't let govt impact our commenting lives in any way whatsoever.

                1. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

                  Some of us. Others are just lazy.

                  1. Sudden   10 years ago

                    It's been an odd week.

                2. Woodchippin' 4 Jesus   10 years ago

                  You can ignore government. But it damn sure isn't ignoring you.

      4. Dread Pirate Roberts   10 years ago

        Just your average juvenile internet commenter.

  11. John C. Randolph   10 years ago

    Niketh V. Velamoor's contempt for the Bill of Rights makes him unfit to practice law in the United States. Can Reason file a complaint with the relevant bar association to bounce this asshole out of the club and start him on the career in manual labor which he deserves?

    -jcr

    1. croaker   10 years ago

      I wonder if any of those named in the subpoena could do likewise? Granted, the chances of him losing his license is somewhere between slim and none, but it would serve as a shot across the bow.

    2. crufus   10 years ago

      "bounce this asshole" sounds like a threat to me.
      Prepare for your grand jury subpoena.

    3. gabeh73   10 years ago

      Valdemoor works for dudes that wants to kidnap people for making internet comments....he probably already has his own special room in hell...I am not saying I wish it to be so....but I just have a feeling....and whoever his boss is...ya he is a power tripping maniac too ....Not that I, a peaceful person, would ever threaten anyone. I am peaceful. But if the masses get tired of having their civil rights abused and decide to revolt...I wouldn't be surprised to see valdemoor and his bosses have bad stuff happen to him. I would be saddened by it and I don't want it to happen, I love all fellow humans...but I am worried for these people, because they seem to be totally ignorant about what they are actually doing.

  12. Dread Pirate Roberts   10 years ago

    Just disgusting. How much of the public's time and money was wasted on this bullshit?

    1. croaker   10 years ago

      It's not over yet. They still have to waste FBI time sendind 12 agents oyt to chill the expression of free speech.

  13. Fist of Etiquette   10 years ago

    Friday afternoon document dump comes to Reason!

    I don't think many of us doubted you would do your best to defend your readers here ("trolls" probably included). Thanks for the thoughtful writing you put out here and for the space to comment on it.

    1. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

      Nobody takes you seriously.

      1. Fist of Etiquette   10 years ago

        I certainly hope not. BOOM. Instant reply.

  14. IceTrey   10 years ago

    Now if only Reason would implement a system which notifies you that someone has replied to a post they would have the best comments on the Net.

    1. Christophe   10 years ago

      But abortion/immigration/trans-whatever/pizza threads would become 10x times as long, as everyone would seek to have the last word.

      1. IceTrey   10 years ago

        It would be like a libertarian story on Salon or Alternet.

        1. Brian   10 years ago

          You want to hang out with miserable people? Go read the Salon comments.

          The frustrations of the libertarian-leaning Reason commenters at the abuses of government power only pale in comparison to the outright rage, fury, misery, and despair of the left-leaning Salon commenter, who enjoys being ruled in part by the largest and most influential political party of the century, which ostensibly agrees with them on everything.

          They are a people surrounded by racist, religious fanatics, and are to be pitied, as they somehow carry on while they control half to three-quarters of the government at any given time, including the presidency.

          1. IceTrey   10 years ago

            I can't, they banned me three times. I gave up.

            1. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

              Yeah, that happened to me at HuffPo years ago.

            2. Suthenboy   10 years ago

              Yeah, I have been banned at every lefty sight. I wear it like a badge of honor.

              But we are the echo chamber.

          2. pogi chipperwoodspecialhell   10 years ago

            I'd rather feed myself feet first into a woodchipper than read the comments at Salon.

            *Please don't misconstrue my obvious hyperbole as a threat against myself or anyone who might share the same name either on the Internet or in real life. In particular I want to be clear that my use of hyperbole directed against the name "pogi" is not a threat to feed my dog (named Pogi) feet first into a woodchipper nor is it a threat against any Filipino who has been or may be referred to as "pogi", which is a Tagalog word meaning handsome. Let me further state that I am in no way, by using the handle pogi, intimating that I am in any way more handsome or better looking than any given federal employee, judge, Filipino boxer/congressman, or Shih Tzu.

          3. bob sacomano   10 years ago

            Joan Walsh is a cunt, that much is certain.

    2. gaoxiaen   10 years ago

      My kingdom (or a bottle of tequila, whichever happens to be worth more) for an edit button.

      1. Pi Guy   10 years ago

        I'm going guess the tequila's worth more.

        Ole'!

  15. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

    That's a long way to convey that all involved in this sad and pathetic spectacle of bull shit
    are in fact cunts.

    Sorry. My mistake.

    Fascist cunts.

  16. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

    You're a noble bunch of writers at Reason. You have integrity and balls. You didn't have tot give a fuck about the commentariat but you do. And though we may thrash some of your staff from time to time, rest assured, they deserved it. The commentariat thanks you.

    1. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

      It's the least they can do for all the times we've entertained them (without pay I might add) while donned in their flannel pajamas in bed sitting on top of a blanket littered with obscure Hanna-Barbera characters and a bowl of low fat yogurt in front of the TV as House of Payne plays on mute.

      /this is totally not how I sleep.

      1. Pi Guy   10 years ago

        "How do you sleep at night?!?!?"

        "Face down. Boxers around my ankles, like I always do."

        1. Marshall Gill   10 years ago

          Boxers around my ankles

          Boxers almost make me believe in God. Almost.

  17. gaoxiaen   10 years ago

    Damn you. Second. Woodchippers.

    1. gaoxiaen   10 years ago

      25 comments in the time it took me to post that. I probably should have refreshed before posting. Shit.

  18. Aresen   10 years ago

    Velamoor for #2!

    Velamoor for #2!

    Velamoor for #2!

    Velamoor for #2!

    Velamoor for #2!

    1. Jesuit Bukkake Bomb   10 years ago

      Who is #1?

      1. Aresen   10 years ago

        That is never answered.

        1. Pro Libertate   10 years ago

          It's Patrick McGoohan. No, not Number 6, I mean the actor/showrunner.

          1. Aresen   10 years ago

            I knew you would get the reference. I was testing whether JBB did.

            Disappointingly few responses, though. Makes me feel old.

            1. Pro Libertate   10 years ago

              I'll send Rover over to roll you over.

        2. Stormy Dragon   10 years ago

          It's answered in the opening credits:

          "Who is #1?"

          "You are, #6."

      2. croaker   10 years ago

        You are #6

        1. kevrob   10 years ago

          Prisoner reference, check.

          My first thought was that HRC had found her Biden.

          Of course if this shambolic pile of flesh and evil is a resident of New York stae, he can't be on the same ticket as Yankee Fangirl #1. (Interestingly, Bronx Bomber worship is another reliable marker for eeeeevvviiiilllll.

          Kevin R

          Let's Go, Mets!

      3. Number 2   10 years ago

        Questions are a burden to others.
        Answers are a prison for oneself.

  19. Warty   10 years ago

    This is the best place on the internet, Nick & Matt. I can't believe you tolerate us.

    1. Woodchippin' 4 Jesus   10 years ago

      Do you believe in markets or not? Someone else would pop up.

  20. neoteny   10 years ago

    Velamoor must have lots of (wood)chips on his shoulder.

  21. Dread Pirate Roberts   10 years ago

    If you're reading this, Preet Bharara and Niketh Velamoor: fuck you, you fascist shitlicking cunts.

    1. Bronwyn   10 years ago

      Amen, a thousand times

  22. Muzzled Woodchipper   10 years ago

    If you listen very closely, you can hear the long overdue firing up of woodchippers in the distance.

    1. croaker   10 years ago

      There's some nice open fields near Nuremberg, PA where 20 woodchippers can be lined up alongside the Drug War Crimes Tribunal. But these folks will have to wait in line.

      At the head are the sick fucks who get off on throwing flash-bangs into baby cribs.

  23. Notorious G.K.C.   10 years ago

    Well, if other commenters are defending Reason's actions, so will I.

    As for the public officials involved in this travesty, I hope they all change careers and take up a more honorable line of work, like begging for change on highway overpasses.

    I mean that they should *voluntarily,* without pressure of any kind, *choose* such a line of work, and otherwise I hope they live long and prosper for many, many years.

    1. Aresen   10 years ago

      I guarantee you that every one of the government people involved will get promoted within the next 5 years. Including the Judge, who will campaign as being "Tough on Crime."

      1. Spencer   10 years ago

        tough on terrorist threats.

        1. Pro Libertate   10 years ago

          Tough on terrorist threads.

          1. Spencer   10 years ago

            + infinity

            1. Charles Easterly   10 years ago

              And beyond?

              1. Spencer   10 years ago

                always...

        2. Chumby   10 years ago

          Ban assault woodchippers with high capacity chutes

      2. Tonio the Plant Fiber Shredder   10 years ago

        Federal judges do not campaign, Aresen. The serious, lifetime appointed ones are appointed by the President with the advice and consent of Congress. There are some little fry that are directly appointed but they serve terms and have limited jurisdiction. Sometimes very limited (administrative law "judges," lol).

        1. Aresen   10 years ago

          Yes they are.

          It's just that the electorate is limited to 100.

        2. mr burns   10 years ago

          "Drones crashed thru my windshield" is a rather catchy tune, much nicer than listening to woodchippers

    2. gaoxiaen   10 years ago

      + 1 tray of ice cubes

  24. EDG chippin' WUD   10 years ago

    Nick & Matt, I love you guys. Thank you for this article. Now go give the pigfuckers in FedGov hell. Never give in!

  25. Leigh   10 years ago

    Thanks Reason & Co, sounds like you've handled this as well as can be done. Makes me furious that this is what the US has become. However, it also make me proud to have been a donating member for last few years and I'll remember this when I make my end of year donations again. Keep fighting the good fight.

    1. gaoxiaen   10 years ago

      Maybe Reason will get a little Streisand Effect action from this.

  26. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

    So. Have sales of woodchippers gone up or not since this whole fiasco began?

    1. fish   10 years ago

      Not since they instituted the background check and waiting period.

      1. Charles Easterly   10 years ago

        In the Founders' days there were no wood chippers....

        1. croaker   10 years ago

          Non they had drawing and quartering.

      2. gaoxiaen   10 years ago

        I'm still struggling with the paperwork on the pressure cooker I ordered last summer.

      3. Chumby   10 years ago

        There is still the woodchipper show loophole...

  27. Vampire   10 years ago

    After these actions by these tyrannical sheisser heads, how many new Libertarian anarchists do we have?

    1. rocks   10 years ago

      Moving toward anarchist, still not at the 'let's burn this motherfucker down' phase yet though. But they definitly seem to be trying their best.

  28. Spencer   10 years ago

    I don't know what I'm more disappointed in:
    The government and their predictably bullying tactics, or...
    The lack of image the the missed opportunity for potentially the greatest alt text of all time!

  29. Djucation   10 years ago

    A line has opened up in front of the woodchipper.

  30. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

    I'm glad Reason did the right thing.

    I knew I did the right thing joining the ranks.

  31. Pro Libertate   10 years ago

    We're really seeing how bad things have gotten. Government officials who care nothing for the rule of law or the rights of citizens and who fear no consequences for their actions, however egregious.

    It's hard to view this ridiculous stunt as anything different than the kind of political persecutions we're learning the IRS and other agencies have committed. Most of us have seen the kind of commentary on leftwing blogs, which, frankly, generally is more hate and (so-called) threat-filled than Hit & Run has ever been, yet a libertarian group gets targeted. Maybe I'm a paranoid libertarian or maybe this sort of thing is as politically motivated as it seems.

    The best response is what you've already said you're going to do:

    From press accounts of similar actions at other news publications and social media sites, we know that it is increasingly common for the federal government to demand user information from publications and websites while also stifling their speech rights with gag orders and letters requesting "voluntary" confidentiality. Exactly how common is anyone's guess; we are currently investigating just how widespread the practice may be.

    1. Christophe   10 years ago

      The Koch brothers are just civilians. We got mouthy about civil servants. Gotta teach the peons their place.

  32. Warty   10 years ago

    The word is vastly overused, but this is truly outrageous. This is so far beyond the petty idiocy of that moron lawyer who sued you because we called him names. The US government is unbelievably disgusting from top to bottom.

    1. Spencer   10 years ago

      I know! We didn't even accuse anyone of bestiality!

      1. Warty   10 years ago

        Preet Bharara in no way looks like a guy who mo....CARRIER LOST

        1. Jesuit Bukkake Bomb   10 years ago

          He molests lost carrier pigeons? Sick!

        2. Spencer   10 years ago

          warty? Warty? WAAAAAARRRRRRTTTTTYYYY??!!!?!?!?!!! *lights go out*

          1. gaoxiaen   10 years ago

            I heard that he lets them fly away when he's done, with a lit firecracker in their assholes.

        3. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

          You guys need to leave the comments about this guy fucking sheep off this thread. I mean, he's a U.S. Attorney, for chrissakes. It's highly unlikely, although possible, that he would have made it through the vetting process and confirmation process if he does, in fact, fuck sheep.

          So please, no comments about Velamoor fucking sheep. Or about Velamoor fucking any livestock. It even about Velamoor willingly sticking his dick into a woodchipper. Those are all out of bounds.

          1. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

            As an addendum, there should be no comments made about Preet Pharara fuckjng sheep either. The same comments I made above about Velamoor not (likely) fuckjng sheep will equally apt to Bharara not (likely) being a sheepfucker.

            1. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

              Oh, or about Bharara sticking his dick in a woodchipper. I'd be shocked if that happens.

          2. Pi Guy   10 years ago

            Damn. Great minds. Sick minds. Whatever.

          3. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

            You're right.

            Make it goats guys.

            He fucks goats.

            Albino goats. And he especially enjoys the rim job.

            1. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

              Vaginas too big on sheeps and goats for their microscopic dicks. Rat fuckers more like it.

              1. Fission Chips   10 years ago

                "Rat fuckers"

                Ah, that takes me back...

        4. Pi Guy   10 years ago

          He may or may not be a pederast. Or a sheep fucker.

          I'm just saying.

          1. AceDroman   10 years ago

            "What's a pederast?"
            "Shut the fuck up Donny."

        5. VG Zaytsev   10 years ago

          isn't Preet the Punjabi word for goatfucker?

      2. Chipper Gore (Suthenboy)   10 years ago

        "I know! We didn't even accuse anyone of bestiality!"

        Of course not. We would never do that, but can you prove Preet is not a pig-fucker?

        I didn't think so.

        1. gaoxiaen   10 years ago

          He isn't really. He has a mechanical pig.

        2. Pope Jimbo   10 years ago

          He doesn't fuck that pig!

          No, he makes love to that pig. A world of difference my cynical friend.

  33. l0b0t   10 years ago

    Are Bharara and Velamoor in this country legally? May we deport them back to whatever blighted land they come from and exchange them for some of their fellow countrymen (or women) who actually add value and worth to the world?

    1. Spencer   10 years ago

      Velemoor sounds an awful lot like Voldemort...

      1. ant1sthenes   10 years ago

        And Niketh sounds a lot like Nikki, so he's probably the worst AUSA.

    2. Old Man With Gag Order   10 years ago

      No, you can't. They have already paid their bribes campaign contributions to Mocha Jesus. That gives them absolute immunity.

      1. Issue Ninja   10 years ago

        Yes, I personally was shocked to see that this attorney fellow is an Obama appointee. Shocked! And that he was unanimously confirmed by 100 sheepfucking Replicrats US Senators. It boggles the mind.

    3. Limpee Wiltstock   10 years ago

      How'd all these foreigners get in the country anyway?

  34. Notorious G.K.C.   10 years ago

    Five days isn't a lot of time to object to having your personal data spilled in the courtroom, but it seems the government didn't even want the targets of their investigation to have even that long a time to act.

    If the feds had their way, the commenters wouldn't have learned about the situation until after their info was handed over. Even though I had supposed anyone claiming his rights were violated has a right of access to the courts to vindicate those rights.

    Oh, if only Obama knew what his ministers were doing!

    1. Tonio the Plant Fiber Shredder   10 years ago

      Oh, if only Obama knew what his ministers were doing!

      That, Eddie, that. (I'm still going to wet-willy, wedgie and swirly you at every opportunity, but you get a 12-hour pass.)

    2. dan'o, waster of ammo   10 years ago

      Funny how the feds act quickly in a case where expediency screws people over

      1. In League with the Dark Ones   10 years ago

        They act quickly in a case that personally benefits them...

  35. paranoid android   10 years ago

    U.S. Attorney Preet Bharara subpoenaed all of the identifying information we had about the authors of such comments as, "Its (sic) judges like these that should be taken out back and shot." And, "Why waste ammunition? Wood chippers get the message across clearly. Especially if you feed them in feet first." This last comment is a well-known Internet reference to the Coen brothers' movie Fargo.

    You know, Rumble in the Bronx also had a wood-chipper scene and came out a year before Fargo. I'm just saying, let's not jump to conclusions here.

    1. IceTrey   10 years ago

      I just watched "Texas Chainsaw" and they have a scene with a car chipper. It's in the floor with no railings or anything. Crazy dangerous. I'm sure it was not OSHA approved.

    2. mr lizard   10 years ago

      The only movie to pit a Lamborghini vs a fucking hovercraft... It is legendary for that reason alone.

  36. Brochettaward   10 years ago

    So, hopefully the follow-up names the judge(s) who signed off on all of this nonsense, as well.

  37. Djucational Woodchipper   10 years ago

    We're gonna need a bigger woodchipper.

    1. Mad Scientist   10 years ago

      How about this one?

      1. Djucational Woodchipper   10 years ago

        Perfect.

      2. space junk   10 years ago

        That thing is cool.

  38. paranoid android   10 years ago

    It's interesting, being an eye-witness to this story unfolding as the threads of the plot come together. For example, this:

    Velamoor told her that he now had "preliminary information" suggesting that Reason was in violation of the court order. Sproul said we were not and asked for further information. Velamoor refused to give any specifics, saying simply that he was "looking into it further."

    Must surely be a reference to this:

    On Friday, June 5th, the day after a source sent me the subpoena, I decided to call Niketh Velamoor, the Assistant U.S. Attorney who issued the subpoena...Mr. Velamoor ? who said he could not discuss grand jury investigations, which is the standard AUSA statement ? said that it was unreasonable to expect the government to be able to prove such a threat before it identified the commenters. That answered my question on the point.

    Mr. Velamoor was suspicious and defensive. At one point he told me that he "believed" that there was a gag order prohibiting this subpoena from being released by its recipients, and that whoever gave it to me must have violated that order, and that he would be "looking into it" and how I got it.

    1. Brochettaward   10 years ago

      said that it was unreasonable to expect the government to be able to prove such a threat before it identified the commenters.

      The irony.

    2. Christophe   10 years ago

      Good on reason rushing out the notifications when they noticed he was being a hardass.

  39. Calidissident   10 years ago

    Proud of Reason in this case. Really frightening to think things have even come to this.

  40. Christophe   10 years ago

    Speaking of long comment threads, you guys should just run ads the whole way down the side instead of stopping at the start of the comments.

    I'm thinking you're actually getting more eyeballs down here than on the actual articles, just due to sheer length.

  41. Tonio the Plant Fiber Shredder   10 years ago

    then-congresswoman Michele Bachman

    Bachmann. Two N's, Nick, since she's of German ancestry. Single N is Jewish.

    1. Pro Libertate   10 years ago

      Is it Tonio or Tonnio?

      1. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

        PWND

        1. Chumby   10 years ago

          PWNND?

          1. Pro Libertate   10 years ago

            Excellent.

            1. Tonio the Plant Fiber Shredder   10 years ago

              Well-played, lads, well-played.

            2. jester   10 years ago

              Dylann is an uber-Jewish name? Is that what you're implying?

    2. Heroic Mulatto   10 years ago

      Single N is Jewish.

      Or Stephen King.

      1. Pro Libertate   10 years ago

        Two Ns.

        Dr. Joseph Dolan: Right. Now, how long have you had these pains, Mr. Barber?

        Fletch: No, that's "Babar".

        Dr. Joseph Dolan: Two B's?

        Fletch: One B. B-A-B-A-R.

        Dr. Joseph Dolan: That's two.

        Fletch: Yeah, but not right next to each other. I thought that's what you meant.

        Dr. Joseph Dolan: Arnold Babar. Isn't there a children's book about an elephant named Babar?

        Fletch: I don't know. I don't have any.

        Dr. Joseph Dolan: No children?

        Fletch: No elephant books.

        1. Pi Guy   10 years ago

          + 6'8" with the Afro

          1. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

            Morris or Pierre?

            1. silverfish   10 years ago

              uh huh yeah

              1. Pro Libertate   10 years ago

                Fletch: Can't keep me here, chief.

                Chief Karlin: Maybe I'm not going to keep you here. Maybe I'm going to blow your brains out.

                Fletch: Well, now, I'm no lawyer, but I do believe that's a violation of my rights.

                1. AFSlade   10 years ago

                  "Do you own rubber gloves?"
                  "I rent 'em... I have a lease with an option to buy."

                  1. 0x90   10 years ago

                    Can I borrow your towel for a sec...

                    1. Bobarian (Would Chip Her)   10 years ago

                      Moo-o-o-n River...

  42. KingJes   10 years ago

    I am now a bit apprehensive about posting a comment and that, in and of itself, should be a clue as to how invasive this government has become.

    My apologies Thomas Jefferson, we have failed in our basic duties as Americans. Things are simply out of control now...

    1. Harvard   10 years ago

      Wait on your Jefferson apology. The Liberty Tree is withered, to be sure, but life giving water can work wonders.

    2. crab_apple   10 years ago

      Jefferson believed the government would probably need to be thrown into the woodchipper every now and then.

  43. PACW   10 years ago

    I don't know if it is an optical illusion or just my natural antipathy toward the power-hungry; but I kept reading the name Voldemort instead of Velamoor.

    1. Seamus   10 years ago

      I think he's more of the Dolores Umbridge type.

      1. juris imprudent   10 years ago

        More the type that would bottom to Dolores Umbridge.

        1. croaker   10 years ago

          Eww.

        2. Fission Chips   10 years ago

          +1 Hogwarts Soap-on-a-Rope

    2. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

      Voldermort was evil but not totally incompetent like dick breath.

  44. BiMonSciFiCon   10 years ago

    I don't wish ill will on anyone, but I do wish that someone with the disposition of Velamoor would find a different line of work. Someone with the power to take away liberty and property should not have such thin skin or be so mendacious.

    1. paranoid android   10 years ago

      More depressing thought: considering how extreme Velamoor's actions were here (like trying to start a new witch hunt to figure out how Ken White knew about the subpoena), I'm wondering if perhaps he serves these sorts of requests on companies all the time, and sees such high rates of compliance with them that he's just flabbergasted that anyone would try to resist or fight back.

      1. Brochettaward   10 years ago

        The article made it sound that way. Basically, most places cave in to government demands. And you look at their tactics, you can see why. Microsoft not cooperating with the Fed requests would probably result in some nice new regulation.

        1. In League with the Dark Ones   10 years ago

          Nice company you got there... be a shame if something... regulatory happened to it.

      2. Pro Libertate   10 years ago

        Nothing to wonder about. The answer is yes. This is not an isolated incident.

      3. Juvenile Bluster   10 years ago

        Of course the answer is yes. Government thugs aren't used to people pushing back.

        1. Heroic Mulatto   10 years ago

          Government thugs aren't used to people pushing back.

          In this case, I believe the term "thugee" is more accurate.

          1. Pathogen   10 years ago

            "thugee", a warm, velour blanket with integral sleeves and a balaclava, for discerning thugs..

            1. AceDroman   10 years ago

              Sounds like a J Peterman ad.

              1. Pathogen   10 years ago

                I was thinking, Sharper Image, or.. SkyMall.

          2. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

            I see what you did there, HM.

            ::Pulls flaming heart out of man's chest while chanting::

            1. Bobarian (Would Chip Her)   10 years ago

              Kali-Ma!

              1. bacon-magic   10 years ago

                ohm num shivari (that's the closest I remember the anti-chant chant to be...)

      4. Fission Chips   10 years ago

        Very much the same thought process as asset forfeiture. FYTW top to bottom.

  45. Medical Physics Guy   10 years ago

    I can't understand why these gag orders are so easy for the feds to slap on everybody. They seem incredibly anti-American. There must be some way to mount a constitutional challenge. I'm sure the usual defense is "but terrorism" and a few decades ago the defense was "but mafia". But it's time for reform.

    1. BiMonSciFiCon   10 years ago

      Judges are former prosecutors. Prosecutors think everyone's a criminal.

      1. Marshall Gill   10 years ago

        Close, they are both attorneys. Attorneys are the scum of the earth and the main source of governmental tyranny. Considering they produce exactly jack and shit, they are parasites pure and simple.

  46. The Hyperbole   10 years ago

    Am I the only one shocked that they didn't use my award winning political cartoon as a graphic for this article? Anyone? Anyone?... Anyhow this is my very last shameless plug for my soon to be classic artwork.[REDACTED]

    1. Troy Woodchipper   10 years ago

      It needs more labels. And is that a generic weed or Weed weed?

    2. mr lizard   10 years ago

      Such subtlety is only matched by the great poets of my race. Continue on with your work, Your Future Reptilian Overlords are pleased.

    3. Agammamon   10 years ago

      I think they're working up a proposal to hire you for the Friday Funnies and don't want to seem too eager.

      1. The Hyperbole   10 years ago

        As long as I retaiin complete artistic control, I'll work for peanuts. Well, peanuts and a leather jacket, and invites to cocktail parties,.. and this lamp, oh and this.., I need this....

        1. Fission Chips   10 years ago

          +1 Opti-Grab

    4. Woodchippin' 4 Jesus   10 years ago

      Katherine Forrest has one big fucking doobie . . .stop, Katie! Stop the doobie chippin'!

  47. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

    Pin this to the top. Every visitor to Reason.com should see this article first.

    1. hurts_donut   10 years ago

      +1

    2. Smilin' Joe Wood Chipper   10 years ago

      ^this

  48. Troy Woodchipper   10 years ago

    First. Reason, thank you for standing up for free speech and us apes.

    Second, Preet Bharara and Niketh Velamoor. So which of you can suck the most cock without tearing up? Preet looks like a wimpy piece of shit. So he probably cheats and uses some benzocaine.

  49. BiMonSciFiCon   10 years ago

    At about 10:30 am ET on Thursday, June 4, our attorney Gayle Sproul (of Levine, Sullivan, Koch, & Schulz) called Velamoor to discuss the subpoena.

    KOCH? I knew it!

    But seriously, good on Ms. Sproul. I know it's her job, but still, good on her.

    1. Pathogen   10 years ago

      (of Levine, Sullivan, Koch, & Schulz)

      Kochtopus!11!1

  50. Lady Dalrymple   10 years ago

    So, was the gag order lifted?

    I'm not clear on that.

    1. Brochettaward   10 years ago

      Yes, earlier today they got the judge to lift it.

      1. Lady Dalrymple   10 years ago

        okay.

        I skimmed quickly.

        Congratulations to Nick and Matt and the reason staff for keeping their cool and doing the right thing by informing the commenters of the subpoena.

  51. See Double You   10 years ago

    Thanks, Reason, for holding out. If it had come down to it, this would have been the hill to die on.

    I am retiring my "woodchipper" handle, for now.

    1. Djucational Woodchipper   10 years ago

      But I just got one! No fair!

    2. Don'tTreadOnMeChipper   10 years ago

      You mean the hill to kick ass on! Well done!

  52. Jesus H. Christ   10 years ago

    Congrats to the brave folks at Reason! Sometimes, there are no really good choices, only less bad ones; especially so when dealing with those who are eager to use force. It was handled as best as can be expected.

    Thanks to Ken at Popehat as well. I believe his comments about the simian ancestry and poor hygiene of the Commentariat was a clever ruse, and that he really does love us.

    1. Pathogen   10 years ago

      "I believe his comments about the simian ancestry and poor hygiene of the Commentariat was a clever ruse, and that he really does love us."

      A back-handed compliment, is still a compliment.. I guess..

  53. JCDavis   10 years ago

    It shocking how rapidly the US descended into totalitarianism under the neocons, but it's even more shocking how this has continued even under the Obama administration. It gives credence to Russ Tice's observation that Cheney was using the NSA to tap Obama's phones from 2004 on, and the possibility that Cheney has turned him into a puppet. And why Bill "Cheney is the best Republican" Kristol congratulated Obama on his foreign policy and called him "a born again neocon."

    1. Brochettaward   10 years ago

      Yea, that's the reason Obama is a mendacious cunt.

    2. Christophe   10 years ago

      Before you get disappointed again: Hillary is going to do the same if elected. As will most Repubs.

      1. JCDavis   10 years ago

        Hilary is already a neocon, but Cheney will have to blackmail her anyway to protect his dirt gathering machine. Can't let the Dems have it, because whoever has it has ultimate power on this planet.

        1. Christophe   10 years ago

          Ok, so you basically personify my pet peeve about conspiracy theories: It's a repackaging of Top Men syndrome.

          "Most people in government would do the right thing, but they're being blackmailed!"

          So instead of addressing the structural problem, proponents just hope that someone EMPs a guy who's been out of office for 7 years.

          1. JCDavis   10 years ago

            You just think he's out of office, but no one as power mad as Cheney, a man would could never be elected president, a man who rat-fucks his enemies--his term--would pass up the chance to get power, and having gotten it, will never give it up. Hoover showed the way by blackmailing several presidents and many Congressmen, keeping his job far longer than was usual, and Cheney is doing exactly the same thing, except he's using a mechanism a hundred times more effective than Hoover's gumshoes. Thus our real president is not Obama the rat. It's Cheney the rat-fucker.

            1. PapayaSF   10 years ago

              Ah, the old story:

              Bad stuff under Republicans = fault of Republicans.

              Bad stuff under Democrats = fault of Republicans.

              1. JCDavis   10 years ago

                The neocon criminals have infested both administrations. Look at the Cheney protegee Victoria Nuland, who got caught restarting the cold war and suffered no consequences. Some are ex-liberals, and Bill Kristol's father is a ex-Marxist. They are attracted to power and have loyalty to no party (unlike so many of Obama's supporters, who support Obama's neocon policies and try to argue away his war crimes).

                1. VG Zaytsev   10 years ago

                  So, I'm going to blow your mind with the truth.

                  Obama is not being blackmailed, he's one of them.

                  From waaaayyyyyy back.

                  His momma worked for the CIA, and he was groomed early on. All the weird, spooky, stuff in his background was not driven by crypto terrorist - but the CIA.

                  1. JCDavis   10 years ago

                    Some years ago I considered if Obama was a Manchurian candidate, and his mysterious past does leave room for speculation. But Russ Tice's assertion that Cheney was spying on him and his instantaneous conversion into a Cheney neocon settled the issue. If he was controlled by the CIA, his policies wouldn't match Cheney's as the CIA didn't like Cheney at all. So the Obama-Cheney convergence didn't happen by accident. He was ratfucked by Cheney and his co-conspirator, General Hayden.

            2. Limpee Wiltstock   10 years ago

              And just a happy co?ncidence that everyone in office happens to be highly blackmailable.

              1. JCDavis   10 years ago

                You only need to blackmail the president, and he will get rid of anyone who doesn't follow his lead. And this guy with his mysterious past was a godsend. If only one of the many claims made about him in the right wing websites were true, you have him completely.

  54. Ken Shultz   10 years ago

    "It takes time, money and resources to challenge, or even simply to comply with, such intrusive demands."

    Excellent reason for everyone who cares to make a donation to help offset such costs.

    There's a "Donate" link right at the top of this page.

    The government must be really scared of what we say here at Hit & Run--and what Reason staff write.

    And that's another excellent reason to make a donation.

    P.S. Fuck the U.S. Attorney's Office for the Southern District of New York.

    Everything they did and why will be a matter of public record and subject to Freedom of Information Act requests, will it not?

    They better have their ducks in a row because I think average Americans would be a lot more upset to find that the U.S. Attorney's Office selectively gagged/chilled a news website because they were against the Drug War--than Americans were to find out that the IRS was selectively rejecting Tea Party groups for tax exemption because of their party affiliation.

    The U.S. Attorney's Office effectively targeted commenters on a libertarian website for engaging in political rhetoric against the Drug War?!

    That's another excellent reason to make a donation to Reason.

    P.P.S. K-E-N S-H-U-L-T-Z

    1. Ken Shultz   10 years ago

      I mean, I'm not sure you're average American thinks that everyone has a right to tax exempt status, but I bet a lot fewer think it's okay for the U.S. Attorney's Office to target commenters for being libertarian and opposed to the Drug War.

      Americans may not think we have a right to tax exempt status, but I bet the overwhelming majority support my right to say that U.S. Attorney Preet Bharara is a fucking asswipe of a fascist loser.

      We should ask for ALL of his emails.

      Every single one of them.

      1. Joshua   10 years ago

        FOIA?

  55. Old Man With Gag Order   10 years ago

    You guys are all beating around the bush, so I'll stick out my VPNed neck and say it.

    I have heard that Niketh Velamoor and Preet Bharara have performed the airtight on goats. I have no proof that this unfortunate rumor is false, so I will assume that indeed, they have routinely committed acts of bestiality. of course, when they have sex with each other, that's bestiality by definition.

    Fuck them with rusty barbed wire. And to Matt and Nick, ditto the nice things people say about you- this is the finest place on the internet, with the smartest and most personable writers and commenters anywhere. Except Richman, who is an antisemitic retard. Still, not a bad batting average.

    1. Troy Woodchipper   10 years ago

      I heard that Preet always whines about being the catcher because it has caused him to prolapse in court. The only thing that saved him the last time he shit all over the floor is that the judge is in to that sort of thing and let it go.

    2. Pathogen   10 years ago

      "I have no proof that this unfortunate rumor is false, so I will assume that indeed, they have routinely committed acts of bestiality."

      I believe there's a gag order on that "alleged" incident.. and you're not supposed to talk about it..

      1. Old Man With Gag Order   10 years ago

        Come and get me, alleged goat fucker!

        1. WoodchipperFocus(ed)   10 years ago

          Well done old man.

          1. Don'tTreadOnMeChipper   10 years ago

            Is this not the best fucking thread evaaaaaa?!

            1. Old Man With Gag Order   10 years ago

              Might be the record for replies? Or at least close?

  56. Scooby   10 years ago

    Assuming that the AUSA and USA for SDNY aren't complete submorons, you can assume the subpoenas they are seeking for everyone else's info will include gag orders prior to service, not after.

    Of course, when you assume...

    1. Juvenile Bluster   10 years ago

      Assuming that the AUSA and USA for SDNY aren't complete submorons

      See, there's your problem.

  57. The Late P Brooks   10 years ago

    "Federal criminal liability," the justices wrote, "generally does not turn solely on the results of an act without considering the defendant's mental state."

    They're working on that.

    1. Troy Woodchipper   10 years ago

      Mens Rea......pffft. Check your privilege, civilian.

  58. GR8IPAZ   10 years ago

    Just don't know where to begin here. Where is the line that shall not be crossed?

    1. Pathogen   10 years ago

      It's arbitrary, citizen.. Take great care where you step, or else..

    2. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

      The rules are arbitrary. That's what fascism is.

  59. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

    This Velamoor is a real piece of shit. I hope we eventually elect a president that will metaphorically shit him out of government...and into a woodchipper.

    Signed,
    Ken Spicer
    Kenspicer111@gmail.com
    Everybody on here knows where I live.

    1. Pro Libertate   10 years ago

      Congratulations, dude. And best wishes to you and your family.

      1. Old Man With Gag Order   10 years ago

        All he did was bang Banjoes. She did the heavy lifting.

        1. Pro Libertate   10 years ago

          Fecundity is our future.

    2. Charles Easterly   10 years ago

      Yes sloop - you live with Liberty and Justice.

      Congratulations again.

    3. Pi Guy   10 years ago

      In CA? Or is it DC?

    4. mr lizard   10 years ago

      Candy Mountain?

  60. Heroic Mulatto   10 years ago

    In 2008, Niketh Velamoor donated 2,050 dollars to the campaign of a particular presidential candidate.

    In 2012, he donated 1,624 dollars to the campaign of the same candidate.

    With this in mind, it is clear that Velamoor is unable to dispassionately perform his duties as prosecutor in this case and should be removed at once.

    1. Brochettaward   10 years ago

      The other one, Preet, was appointed by Obama, as well. They are from NY. We all know where their bread has been buttered.

      1. Old Man With Gag Order   10 years ago

        What was the Mark Twain quote? Oh yeah:

        You tell me whar a man gits his corn pone, en I'll tell you what his 'pinions is.

      2. Chip Dalasio   10 years ago

        It should also be noted that Mr. Bharara was a staffer for Chuck Schumer.

        1. kevrob   10 years ago

          Special assistant for clearing a path between the senator and a TV camera/radio microphone?

          Kevin R

      3. gaoxiaen   10 years ago

        You mean "get their buns buttered".

      4. A special place in JW's Hell   10 years ago

        We all know where their bread has been buttered.

        That means anal sex, right?

    2. Old Man With Gag Order   10 years ago

      Right. That'll happen. Sure. Right after Racheal Price knocks on my door and offers me oral.

      1. Heroic Mulatto   10 years ago

        You, sir, have excellent taste.

        1. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

          I second this. I am a fan.

          1. Old Man With Gag Order   10 years ago

            I always have a warm glow when I find that two of my favorite commenters share my tastes.

            But I still want oral from her.

            1. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

              two of my favorite commenters

              I love you, too.

        2. EDG chippin' WUD   10 years ago

          But does he taste excellent?

          I guess we'll have to as Rachael Price?

          1. EDG chippin' WUD   10 years ago

            Ask. Ask Rachael Price.

            1. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

              The singer in this group. The Old Man wants that. Hell yeah.

              1. Wasteland Wanderer   10 years ago

                Meh; she has a bit of a horse face. I'd prefer the cellist.

                1. Old Man With Gag Order   10 years ago

                  You're dead to me. DEAD TO ME.

                2. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

                  That's it, the wasteland wanderer is going on my list.

                3. Bobarian (Would Chip Her)   10 years ago

                  I'd prefer the cellist

                  But you'd probably be happy with the drummer...

                  /NTTAWWT

                  1. Wasteland Wanderer   10 years ago

                    Not my style. I mean, dude looks like a low-rent Fonz. Jesus. I have standards, you know.

                    1. kevrob   10 years ago

                      WFUV.org has LSD in their archives. Enjoy.

                      http://www.wfuv.org/content/la.....-hall-2014

                      Kevin R

      2. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

        Just got done watching Alex Cross. Rachel Nicols not bad either.

  61. A special place in JW's Hell   10 years ago

    Reason's unmoderated comment space is rare among comparable publications and has, over the years, developed into a forum that is by turns exciting, intellectually advanced, outlandish, cringe-inducing, and more foul-mouthed than any locker room this side of the Crab Nebula.

    Now, that is how to call us names. Are you listening, stuffed shirts of the movement?

    Nick & Matt, count me in for any needed fundraising to fight these assholes.

    1. Pro Libertate   10 years ago

      Not only that, I may have to be even more vocal in my support of Paul. Someone has to end the madness.

      1. Heroic Mulatto   10 years ago

        even more vocal in my support of Paul

        1. Pro Libertate   10 years ago

          More Rand than Ron, and probably more money. I wore my Rand shirt yesterday.

          1. Bobarian (Would Chip Her)   10 years ago

            I got that one, and the NSA one as well.

            1. Don'tTreadOnMeChipper   10 years ago

              Is that Nick on the far right?

  62. Brochettaward   10 years ago

    When they say they are investigating the source of Popehat's article today, that likely means that they've gotten subpoenas for a whole lot of personal info on the Reason staff. God knows what that might include to try and show communication between the two parties.

    And would Reason even know about it? It would be a separate investigation.

  63. Seamus   10 years ago

    Caesar had his Brutus, Charles I his Cromwell, and Assistant United States Attorney Niketh Velamoor his T. Woodrow McChipper.

  64. Chumby   10 years ago

    Woodchipper 2016

  65. Christophe   10 years ago

    Nice article picture, BTW.

    1. Old Man With Gag Order   10 years ago

      No alt-text. I take back everything nice that I said about Nick and Matt.

  66. Je Suis Reason (Fmr. AuH20)   10 years ago

    Maybe if we're pointing out your physical shortcomings, you guys should squat more.

    Warty has a weight room in his basement. I'm sure he'd be happy to help

    1. Brochettaward   10 years ago

      I think that's just a trick used to lure unsuspecting victims into the basement.

    2. A Self-Identified $park?   10 years ago

      I get the feeling some of the Reason staff do plenty of squats, IYKWIMAITYD.

    3. Pathogen   10 years ago

      None but a fool squats in front of Warty..

  67. RaleighScott   10 years ago

    I have had a theory for a long time that the reason clowns like Velamoor do these things is because they know they won't face any sanctions. I propose that Reason take up a collection for legal fees, or find attorneys willing to work pro bono, and sue him into poverty. File several concurrent lawsuits, both in state and federal court. Heck, file in small claims too. Really make an example of him and publicize the hell out of it. Don't sue his office or the state, just him. Make it plain that any asshole prosecutor that goes after you without true probable cause will get figuratively bitten. Go after the judge that issued the gag too, if he should have known better. Just spitballing here, but sue them for civil rights violations, fraud, perjury, and just generally being scummy human beings. Although that last one might be hard as it seems to be a job requirement to be an officer of the court these days.

    1. PapayaSF   10 years ago

      IANAL, but I believe it is difficult to impossible to sue government attorneys for their actions on the job.

      1. Whahappantomychipper?   10 years ago

        Sovereign immunity says FYTW.

    2. lizbuddie   10 years ago

      No cause of action here. Even when they are exceeding the legal bounds of their authority, you can't get to them. Governmental immunity is strong.

      1. Cyto   10 years ago

        Some would say absolute. Like the U.S. Supreme Court.

        1. bacon-magic   10 years ago

          Only a Sith deals in absolutes...

  68. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

    I swear I'll block my Friday night out if it means reading 1000 comments pissing on these assholes ALL NIGHT LONG.

    1. Bronwyn   10 years ago

      Thanks for the ear worm, jerk 😉

    2. EDG chippin' WUD   10 years ago

      Well I'm gonna go pour me a vodka Collins, get my buzz going and piss on these assholes all night long.

      Also roast lemon chicken, make rice with olives, green onions and chopped parsley, and make a carrot and red cabbage slaw with a sweet tahini dressing.

      1. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

        That sounds awesome.

  69. Bronwyn   10 years ago

    What the hell, squirrels?!?

    Despite the god damn squirrels that ate my first (and second) comment (oh do please let all three attempts land in a string of squirrely pearls), this is the most infuriating, horrifying, intelligent, and inspiring corner of the internet and I love it and all you sick bastards.

    Bharara and Velamoor should be stripped of power and publically humiliated in the strongest possible terms (permitted by law). May they rot in the hell I don't believe in.

    1. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

      (permitted by law)

      Fuck that. How about "permitted by justice". Assholes like those two have percerted the law to the point where they enjoy near-complete immunity for deliberate malfeasance, for witness tampering and for malicious prosecution a do deprivation of civil rights. Doing to them the worst "permitted by law" would be to give them an extended vacation followed by a sweet pension on the taxpayer's dime. Whereas the word "permitted by Justice would involve tar, feathers and and something a train rides on.

      1. Bronwyn   10 years ago

        I really was thinking more along the "tarred, feathered, and run out of town on a rail" scenario, honestly. Let's go with that, then. I like it.

        1. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

          I just like to remind people that "permitted by law" usually carries a different penalty for the King's Men than it does for the plebes. And just because enough shitheads in the past gave up the right to equal protection under the law to these cretinous bastards, doesn't mean exacting justice should be out of bounds.

          These men that would abuse their authority in order to stifle dissent need to have their heads examined...in a (metaphorically speaking, Mr Bharara) creative manner that Gallagher would be proud of.

          1. Bronwyn   10 years ago

            I was just adding the now-required "this is not a threat" threat caveat.

            I really am happy for you guys on the birth of Justice! Maybe someday we'll have a get-together of wee Agitator/Reasonoids.

            1. A special place in JW's Hell   10 years ago

              Glad to see you still lurk Bronwyn. You should come around more often.

          2. Pi Guy   10 years ago

            Excellent. It's Sledgomatic Time.

    2. jester   10 years ago

      No, Bronwyn, isn't it bad karma that will get them in the end? Or maybe some bad korma at some NY Indian greasy-spoon?

  70. Adans smith   10 years ago

    If they thought this would chill the comments on H&R they were mistaken.Ther's been a lot of gold on here since the news broke.Oh and W O OD C H I P P E R!

  71. LynchPin1477   10 years ago

    I'll triple my contribution if you put a woodchipper on the reason shirt.

    1. Quincy chips in   10 years ago

      chip semper tyrannis

      1. Florida Man   10 years ago

        ^this is simple brilliant...also probably racist.

      2. All-Seeing Woodchipper   10 years ago

        I'll take 5.

        1. Don'tTreadOnMeChipper   10 years ago

          Count me in.

      3. Chumby   10 years ago

        The tree of liberty must be mulched from time to time with the woodchips of patriots and tyrants.

        1. gaoxiaen   10 years ago

          It prefers tyrants, but always ends up with patriots.

        2. jester   10 years ago

          DeflateGate again? Isn't a four game suspension enough?

      4. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

        Nice:)

  72. The Late P Brooks   10 years ago

    That Bharara guy, he's really something.
    What, I'm not at liberty to say.

    1. gaoxiaen   10 years ago

      He's a chip off the old (wooden) block.

      1. jester   10 years ago

        Excuse the pun(jab).

  73. Mad Scientist   10 years ago

    Nick and Matt, thanks so much for standing up for what you believe in. That really does take some of the sting out of every nut punch.

    1. Pro Libertate   10 years ago

      Liberty is not an end but a process.

      1. A Self-Identified $park?   10 years ago

        Oh what would you know about liberty...

        1. Pro Libertate   10 years ago

          I invented it.

          1. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

            I invented the question mark.

            1. Mad Scientist   10 years ago

              What's your opinion on chestnuts?

              1. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

                "Why the hell would you have a bucket of chestnuts, bro?"

            2. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

              Liar. Dr. Evil's father did.

              You think we're stupid and ignorant don't you?

              Take your act to Huffington and Salon pal.

              1. coloraDOOM   10 years ago

                "I'm starting to think his mania is not limited to the ring..."

  74. crufus   10 years ago

    I don't understand why there is no mention of this on his Wikipedia page:
    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Preet_Bharara

    1. Bronwyn   10 years ago

      Maybe this is all about Preet's butthurt over being called out in Jacob's 2011 piece on Bharara's hardon for online poker.

      1. Brochettaward   10 years ago

        If Preet's been reading here since 2011, just waiting for the perfect chance to strike, would it really have taken 4 years to issue subpoenas to hem everyone up?

        1. Bronwyn   10 years ago

          Doubt it, but I'm not inclined to give him any credit.

        2. A special place in JW's Hell   10 years ago

          So he's been a weaselly cheesdick for years?

          Color me surprised. I guess pulling the wings off of flies only goes so far.

    2. Djucational Woodchipper   10 years ago

      Apparently he was a candidate to replace Eric Holder.

      *gag*

      1. Djucational Woodchipper   10 years ago

        ^order

      2. Tejicano   10 years ago

        Well, he appears to have a similar level of respect for the constitution as Holder has demonstrated

    3. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

      Standby...

  75. mr lizard   10 years ago

    Congratulations stoooopid mammals you have agreived your own overlord class to the point of arriving at a determine location of notoriety

    1. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

      ::grabs heat lamp bulb with towel and twists counterclockwise::

      1. mr lizard   10 years ago

        I see you cannot take compliments well... I have mistaken you for a male of your species... Dick

        1. Pathogen   10 years ago

          We'll see how you feel whilst food festers in your stomach, with no heat to complete your digestion cycle... It is alleged to be excruciating..

          1. mr lizard   10 years ago

            Florida Man installed a panic button that I have already activated. He will be here any second with a new bulb and a heating pad...

            1. Pathogen   10 years ago

              You win this round, reptilian...

              1. Agammamon   10 years ago

                Watch out for the racoons - they've already thrown in with the reptiles.

                http://travel.aol.co.uk/2015/0.....hotograph/

                The little bastards are no longer content with your garbage cans, they see the opportunity to seize the means of production.

                1. kevrob   10 years ago

                  Slip the lizard some ginger.

                  {Emphatic cough!}

                  Kevin R

          2. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

            I'm fucking dying

  76. OldMexican   10 years ago

    Reason's unmoderated comment space is rare among comparable publications and has, over the years, developed into a forum that is by turns exciting, intellectually advanced, outlandish, cringe-inducing, and more foul-mouthed than any locker room this side of the Crab Nebula.

    Thank you, Nick. It is always nice to feel appreciated. Free wood chippers and a mule, for all!

    1. jester   10 years ago

      Mule? I always knew you were a drug smuggler. Nothing wrong with that.

  77. hurts_donut   10 years ago

    If someone starts a Gofundme/ChipIn/etc. for Reason I'll throw in. It would get a lot more exposure than a donate button on their website.

    1. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

      I'll donate, but only if it's on a site called "Chip In".

      1. jester   10 years ago

        Why don't they have a Reason Fundraiser at $400 a plate featuring Fish 'n' Chips, instead?

  78. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

    Lawyers, you dirtbags you, can you help explain this tweet? Is what he did serious? Is a bar complaint serious?

    1. Brochettaward   10 years ago

      The guy is a AUSA. He would need to be caught red handed with his dick covered in coke while a shemale prostitute did a line to get disbarred. He covered his ass, reading the tweets, by saying that he wasn't sure who his representation was.

      1. croaker   10 years ago

        Not even then. Government privilege.

    2. Pro Libertate   10 years ago

      It can be if an attorney can be shown to have violated an ethics canon. What he's talking about could be improper, though something like that by itself is unlikely to result in discipline. I mean, look at all of the totally unethical stuff lawyers do all of the time, and how many get disciplined?

      1. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

        Thank you for providing some context.

        I hope he gets pestered by some process he has to deal with because of his actions.

        1. Juvenile Bluster   10 years ago

          Unfortunately, prosecutors rarely see that process. Here's hoping, at least.

          1. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

            See:
            Nifong, Mike
            Clinton, Bill

  79. Caress of Woodchipper   10 years ago

    "Wow. That shitbag AUSA deliberately contacted a represented party. Bar complaint."

    Interesting.

    1. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

      HA!

  80. Ken Shultz   10 years ago

    "At about 10:30 am ET on Thursday, June 4, our attorney Gayle Sproul (of Levine, Sullivan, Koch, & Schulz) called Velamoor to discuss the subpoena. The call did not go well. Sproul asked Velamoor to consider scaling back the scope of the subpoena by omitting the more benign commenters. Velamoor said simply, "No." Then Sproul informed him that we would be notifying our commenters about the subpoena to give them the chance to defend their rights to remain anonymous, and that we would not comply with the subpoena as it related to any commenters who moved to quash the subpoena before our compliance deadline. Sproul explained to him that there is case law firmly establishing that these commenters have the right to speak anonymously, and that we would withhold the information of anyone fighting the subpoena. Velamoor disputed that any such free speech rights exist."

    Apparently U.S. Attorney Niketh Velamoor doesn't understand free speech rights, very well, and I think we should take it upon ourselves to educate him.

    I have a suggestion:

    Maybe Reason should hold an Everybody Draw Niketh Velamoor Contest.

    That's what Reason has used to teach people about free speech rights in the past!

    We could send him all the entries and give him a vote on which one wins.

    1. Troy Woodchipper   10 years ago

      Velamoor disputed that any such free speech rights exist."

      Is New York's bar exam multiple choice?

      1. Brochettaward   10 years ago

        You can't expect a AUSA to know all the case law on insignificant things like free speech or anything else for that matter. Have you seen how many laws there are? It's a lot.

        1. Pathogen   10 years ago

          Yeah.. I'm told that "LAW" is a big book, with a bunch of words (many of them in a foreign tongue). Who has time to read all that shit..

          1. jester   10 years ago

            Ignorance of the law is no excuse. I'm shocked at how many of you fools don't know the law.

    2. Chumby   10 years ago

      Almost every entry would include either bestiality or a woodchipper.

      1. Ken Shultz   10 years ago

        Mine would have him running the First Amendment through a woodchipper.

        1. jester   10 years ago

          Costco is selling woodchippers now at an amazingly low price.

    3. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

      8=====) ---

      What do I win?

      1. Ken Shultz   10 years ago

        It's a good one!

      2. gaoxiaen   10 years ago

        8====D~~~ ( :

        1. A Self-Identified $park?   10 years ago

          8=====D~~~()*()

        2. Florida Man   10 years ago

          8====D~~~ 0-:

          I'm not saying he swallows...

          1. Troy Woodchipper   10 years ago

            I think it is part of the gag order to not identify swallowers.

          2. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

            We are a classy bunch.

            1. Feet First (Kevin)   10 years ago

              I read this as a classy 'brunch'. Hmmm...

              1. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

                Nothing wrong with that

          3. mr lizard   10 years ago

            8=========~~~~~ -(: (:

            Do the math bitches

          4. jester   10 years ago

            How do you know so much about swallows?

      3. jester   10 years ago

        So we are seeing competing...circumcised vs. not?

    4. croaker   10 years ago

      "Maybe Reason should hold an Everybody Draw Niketh Velamoor Contest."

      (_*_)

  81. The Late P Brooks   10 years ago

    I may be a puerile, foulmouthed internet troll, but I'm not an errand boy for a crazy person, dressed up as a government flunky.
    I hold my head high.

    1. jester   10 years ago

      Jejune. But me too.

  82. BiMonSciFiCon   10 years ago

    "Suppressing speech is just something we do together. GET OVER IT, LIBERTARIANS."

    -Kevin Drum

  83. Caress of Woodchipper   10 years ago

    Reason folks: how about putting up the donation banner again so we can donate with pithy woodchipper sayings that show up in lights at the top of the page.

    1. Pathogen   10 years ago

      Woodchipper of the month jam & jelly club?

  84. Almanian - Wood Chipper-ish   10 years ago

    OH! And in case it wasn't noted elsewhere above since I posted earlier,

    the first rule of gag order club is.......

    [REDACTED]

    1. Caress of Woodchipper   10 years ago

      The second rule of gag order club is... Get in the chipper.

      1. gaoxiaen   10 years ago

        That's third. Number two is number one.

        1. A Self-Identified $park?   10 years ago

          Who is number six?

        2. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

          His name is Almanian Woodchipper.

          His name is Almanian Woodchipper.

          His name is Almanian Woodchipper.

          1. Pathogen   10 years ago

            +1 Meat Loaf

  85. Almanian - Wood Chipper-ish   10 years ago

    Guess who else is posting on the TweetrZ about you assholes! Well, OK - US assholes....

    Virginia Postrel ?@vpostrel 6m6 minutes ago
    Lawyer asked AUSA to omit "benign commenters" from subpoena. Velamoor said simply, "No." http://buff.ly/1H444aF #DOJvReason #Reasonsubpoena

    DRINK! Just cause....no REASON.

    1. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

      She is reading this! Class it up!

    2. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

      /slaps forehead.

      I forgot Virginia *may* read this thread.

      Straighten up and please be fucken POLITE for the love of God. People MAY BE READING US.

      /twists tie out of collar.

      1. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

        I think she is pretty cool, and her bloomberg column about this travesty was good (and she is sharing with her followers, which is also productive), but this tweet (as benign as it is) made me laugh.

        1. Pro Libertate   10 years ago

          Warty's fame knows no end.

          1. jester   10 years ago

            Warty-Epi-SugarFree-ProLib is the heart of the commentariat, (sorry, rest of us). It's been the best free entertainment since internet porn.
            (I know I forgot someone! Dammit!)

            1. jester   10 years ago

              Baked-fucking-Penguin.

        2. Florida Man   10 years ago

          Oh come on! Warty gets the placed sued and Virgina retweets him?!?
          *punches hole in wall*

    3. Juvenile Bluster   10 years ago

      She secretly loves us.

      1. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

        She loves the idea of a proper, buttoned up version of us.
        Emails were sent, emails were received, and progress was not made.

        This place is a locker room. A brilliant, hilarious locker room.

        1. Pathogen   10 years ago

          "This place is a locker room. A brilliant, hilarious locker room."

          Better than foul and fetid..

        2. Sudden   10 years ago

          And Jesse keeps showing under the faucet head immediately next to me.

        3. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

          It takes a special kind of woman to hang here for sure.

  86. Aloysious   10 years ago

    However trollish many of our commenters can be...

    I think he just called you fuckers trolls.

    And yeah, donations incoming.

    1. Troy Woodchipper   10 years ago

      Who are you calling a fucker, pal?

      1. Stormy Dragon   10 years ago

        I'm not you pal, friend.

        1. Troy Woodchipper   10 years ago

          I'm not your friend, guy.

          1. gaoxiaen   10 years ago

            I'm not your guy, bitch.

      2. Aloysious   10 years ago

        Every fucker on this board.

        Preet Bhrara and Velamoor, those TOILET FISH deserve to be flushed. I think I will send them each a card with only two words written on it. The words will consist of fuck and off.

        1. Woodchippin' 4 Jesus   10 years ago

          Are they Dem or Rep?

          1. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

            Yes. They are both part of the two-party shuts how.

            1. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

              Shitshow.

              Fuck, now they've got Apple helping censor my toilet mouth.

          2. Old Man With Gag Order   10 years ago

            Dem donors and appointees.

            1. Woodchippin' 4 Jesus   10 years ago

              Which is why there was no indignation from the left,-of-,center media. Where was HuffPo, Mother Jones, Salon (eeeeew)? Curiously, silent. Silently cheering Preet on. And blessing a Reuter's hit piece by the esteemed Alan Wolfe

              1. jester   10 years ago

                Curiously Silent: great name for a...Metal band?

          3. croaker   10 years ago

            Does it matter? Two sides of the Boot On Your Neck Party.

            1. Woodchippin' 4 Jesus   10 years ago

              Yeah, it matters . . Where's that asshole Tony?. Tony, the Democrat-Socialist, ,"Government is Good for You"' central-planning snitch?

              Hiding? Ashamed?

    2. Pathogen   10 years ago

      No, he just meant Pro Libertate and Florida Man..

  87. A Self-Identified $park?   10 years ago

    This is what happens when you outsource the DOJ to India. Amirite or amirite? Amirite?

    1. jester   10 years ago

      You ain't right. (you're a libertarian.) But puns are awesome, yes they are.

  88. Charles Easterly   10 years ago

    Thank you Gayle Sproul (of Levine, Sullivan, Koch, & Schulz).

    Thank you Nick, Matt, et al.

    And thanks even unto you, ye of the unwashed masses who recently made wood chipper (or some variation) a part of your moniker or have over the months and years "shouted" against oppression here and elsewhere.

    May your monocles ever stay polished and, most importantly, may the flame of liberty never be extinguished from your hearts and minds.

    /Charles joining the shaking of the pillars, and all that....

    1. Woodchippin' 4 Jesus   10 years ago

      Oh, I will NEVER change my handle. I may come up with more, before the year is finished.

    2. jester   10 years ago

      My LASIC surgery rendered my monocle obsolete. Oh, to turn back the clocks of time.

  89. BiMonSciFiCon   10 years ago

    The best thing for this country that a President Paul could do would be to remove folks like Velamoor and replace them with attorneys like those at the Institute for Justice (or Ken White (or me!)).

    As much as I would like it, what's written in the Constitution, or even the general laws and regulations of the federal government, doesn't matter. It takes men and women of principle and integrity to enforce laws in a just way.

    In short, we need more Charlies and fewer Georges, Harry, Jimmys and Trents. /end Pacino rant.

    1. Pro Libertate   10 years ago

      Judge Rayford: Mr. Kirkland you are out of order!

      Arthur Kirkland: You're out of order! You're out of order! The whole trial is out of order! They're out of order! That man, that sick, crazy, depraved man, raped and beat that woman there, and he'd like to do it again! He *told* me so! It's just a show! It's a show! It's "Let's Make A Deal"! "Let's Make A Deal"! Hey Frank, you wanna "Make A Deal"? I got an insane judge who likes to beat the shit out of women! Whaddya wanna gimme Frank, 3 weeks probation?

      Frank Bowers: *DAMMIT!*

      Arthur Kirkland: [to Judge Fleming] You, you sonofabitch, you! You're supposed to *stand* for somethin'! You're supposed to protect people! But instead you rape and murder them!

      [dragged out of court by bailiffs]

      Arthur Kirkland: You killed McCullough! You killed him! Hold it! Hold it! I just completed my opening statement!

      1. A Self-Identified $park?   10 years ago

        YOU'RE ALL OUT OF OOORDEEERRRRR!

    2. Wasteland Wanderer   10 years ago

      Ken White was a federal prosecutor at one point. Then he realized how fucked up it was, got out and became a defense attorney.

      Perhaps it would have been better if he'd stayed in...or perhaps it would have taken him over and destroyed his soul.

  90. Woodchippin' 4 Jesus   10 years ago

    But Reason complied. My heart is broken.

    1. Florida Man   10 years ago

      They gave the commenters heads up with the option to challenge. They chose not to. I think reason did the best they could.

      1. Woodchippin' 4 Jesus   10 years ago

        Seems like you're rationalizing to me. If one believes in free speech, you do not capitulate by ratting out your foul mouthed neighbor. IMHO

        1. Florida Man   10 years ago

          What would you have them do? Arm up and surround the servers?

          1. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

            I know, right? It's not like they're a Secretary Of State that can just delete shit on a whim. They're little people. They have to comply with little fascists like these lest they bear the full wrath of the United States Department Of Justice.*

            *Unless their commentators threaten to hang or shoot George W Bush while he's still in office. Then they get a speech in their honor by the same SoS listed above.

            1. Troy Woodchipper   10 years ago

              I don't expect Nick & Company to risk real jail so I can mock some stupid sheepfuckers.

              1. Woodchippin' 4 Jesus   10 years ago

                It's not for you or me. It is bigger than any of us. It is really about liberty.

                This could be a watershed event in the libertarian era.

                1. MarkLastname   10 years ago

                  A Pyrrhic victory more likely. The rest of the media (so basically all of it) would report the incident sympathetically to the DOJ; they get to hello get rid of some nascent competition. They manufacture the truth after all, and the masses aren't going to erupt in protester over "extremist anti-government magazine refuses to cooperate with the good guys after commenters violently threatened esteemed public servants for putting murdering drug dealer in jail."

          2. Woodchippin' 4 Jesus   10 years ago

            Interesting . . . Interesting option, Cupcake.

      2. Agammamon   10 years ago

        Its fine that reason did not challenge the subpoena - case law pretty clearly shows that the courts are going to allow this abuse. It would have simply been a waste of resources that could be better deployed elsewhere.

        Personally - I explicitly gave Reason permission to turn over my info.

        1. MoriahJovan   10 years ago

          Do you have a legal defense fund set up somewhere?

          1. Agammamon   10 years ago

            I have a GoFundMe thing set up - but I'm not taking donations unless I end up needing them, thanks.

            Should I get subpoenaed to appear in NYC (or, worse, arrested) I may pull the trigger on it to help cover expenses.

            But as of now, my expenses have been some hours spent pouring over legal minutia and the Rules of Federal Procedure (along with the Sentencing Guidelines Manual) in my free time which, to be honest, has been more like a hobby than an imposition.

            1. Woodchippin' 4 Jesus   10 years ago

              Why is this happening to you? It's just so much bullshit. And now you have to pay for an attorney to say you misspoke.

              It's unreal.

    2. Juvenile Bluster   10 years ago

      As explained above and by Ken White, there's absolutely nothing Reason could have done to fight this. Under the circumstances, they did extraordinarily well.

    3. jester   10 years ago

      They stay on line. Nous sommes woodchipper. Tout a fait, raisonable!

  91. Robert   10 years ago

    OK, but can we discuss Lucy yet?

    1. BiMonSciFiCon   10 years ago

      NO!

      1. BiMonSciFiCon   10 years ago

        Unless you say nice things. Lucy's great.

    2. A Self-Identified $park?   10 years ago

      Fuck Lucy*, 2Chilly is leaving.

      *Make sure you have the consent forms signed in triplicate first.

      1. WoodchipperFocus(ed)   10 years ago

        That sucks, 2chilly is awesome.

  92. Florida Man   10 years ago

    Good work guys. You know I'll show my love come donation time.

  93. A Self-Identified $park?   10 years ago

    On a serious note, I don't necessarily agree with everything on the Reason/Libertarian agenda, but this is bar none the best forum on all of the Internet. Sure there are plenty of foul-mouthed assholes, but there are also a LOT of really brilliant people here.

    1. Woodchippin' 4 Jesus   10 years ago

      Foul-mouthed brilliance is a blessing and a curse.

      Damn freedom! God damn her all to hell!

    2. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

      but there are also a LOT of really brilliant people here.

      Thank's for noticing, buddy. Right back at you.

      1. Sudden   10 years ago

        Sure there are plenty of foul-mouthed assholes

        Thanks for noticing me too guys

    3. A Self-Identified $park?   10 years ago

      Edit: Except for Crusty Juggler, that dude's a huge douche...

      1. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

        Everybody already knows that.

    4. Limpee Wiltstock   10 years ago

      Oh, yeah. You're all fucking geniusses.

  94. Ecoli   10 years ago

    After years of anonymously reading the H&R blog and comments, I had decided to add my own inane comments, but it seems silence is the better approach in today's America.

    1. Florida Man   10 years ago

      Don't let them shut you up. The commenters here are a great bunch. You just Can't take them or yourself too seriously.

      1. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

        You have it easy. Nobody's ever taken Florida Man seriously.

        1. Florida Man   10 years ago

          Back when I was Floridian I took myself and the commenters more seriously. Then I took up the FM mantle and life became much simpler.

          1. paranoid android   10 years ago

            So it's a sort of legacy title passed down from one Florida Man to a successor, kind of like being The Flash?

            1. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

              Or like the Dread Pirate Ro...

              Oh. My. God.

              1. Florida Man   10 years ago

                Good work. Rest well. I'll most likely kill you in the morning Sloopy.

              2. Dread Pirate Roberts   10 years ago

                That's what my predecessor told me.

            2. Agammamon   10 years ago

              Or 'The Ghost Who Walks'.

              http://joshreads.com/?cat=25

    2. MoriahJovan   10 years ago

      I'm a new commenter too. You can come eat your lunch with me.

      1. Agammamon   10 years ago

        We need a new commenter program to bring people along.

        So this doesn't happen to you (not you, you - you've been here too long Moriah, our rot has already set in).

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=exzhFo50f8A

        And for something *intentionally* funny.

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r25QVBhZ0k4

  95. Pro Libertate   10 years ago

    The more we fight for our freedoms, the more we have freedoms to fight for.

    Reason is to be commended for its handling of this injustice, and I very much look forward to their deep(er) investigation into prosecutorial misconduct like this.

    1. jester   10 years ago

      ...for their Deepak investigation...(and NO, it's not an Indian Sub-continent thing)...it's about making stupid puns (all things aside).

  96. Catatafish & Woodchips   10 years ago

    Apologies if someone already asked this question but am I to understand Velamoor contacted Reason directly after being informed they had legal representation?

    Also, goodonya Matt, Nick and Reason Foundation.

    1. Juvenile Bluster   10 years ago

      That investigation has the potential to do more harm to our nuts than a Balko story, but it's necessary, and I'm looking forward to it as well.

  97. Banjos   10 years ago

    Reason's unfettered comment section has given me an incredible education, endless entertainment, an amazing husband, and three beautiful daughters. Thank you, Matt. You and Reason's Dedication to freedom has given me the world.

    1. BiMonSciFiCon   10 years ago

      +1 million awwws.

      and congrats!

      1. Rhywun   10 years ago

        Congrats from me too! So when's the next one?

    2. Warty   10 years ago

      an amazing husband

      Why'd you leave him for Ken?

      1. A Self-Identified $park?   10 years ago

        Ken came from a failed marriage, makes lousy money, and is a huge asshole. What's not to love?

        1. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

          Um, I make good money. I demand you retract that one part of your comment.

          1. jester   10 years ago

            *Redaction complete*

    3. Warty   10 years ago

      So how are you doing? Are they giving you the good drugs?

      1. Banjos   10 years ago

        Oh yeah. I'm pushing the magic morphine button as many times as they allow me to.

        1. DEG   10 years ago

          Nice! And congratulations to you and sloopy!

        2. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

          Congrats Banjos. Glad you're doing well. Morphine is the best.

    4. mr lizard   10 years ago

      So you +stormy + the kitten+ the worst ever + Susan + your 3 hatchlings = 8 libertarian women?

      I'll have to get more ear tags to keep track of y'all.

      1. Bronwyn   10 years ago

        *ahem*

        1. BiMonSciFiCon   10 years ago

          ifh, riven, Lady Bertrum... We're up to double digits!

          1. Quincy chips in   10 years ago

            Hayeksplosives, MoriahJovan, RAHeinlein, BuSab Agent...

            1. Florida Man   10 years ago

              Nicole, Kristen, Carol ...

              1. Quincy chips in   10 years ago

                Hamster of Doom, HazelMeade...

                1. Christophe   10 years ago

                  Don't forget Mary Stack.

                  /ducks

                2. Francisco d'Anconia   10 years ago

                  Banjos, Dagny

                  1. Francisco d'Anconia   10 years ago

                    IFH

                    1. Francisco d'Anconia   10 years ago

                      Kibby

              2. mr lizard   10 years ago

                The worst was already cited... Now get back to work on my airboat gunship! You'll need a bigger generator for my heat lamp

                1. Florida Man   10 years ago

                  Sorry my clammy skinned friend.
                  *flips down welding mask*

                  1. mr lizard   10 years ago

                    And while you're at it can you get me a new heat lamp bulb? Pathogen stole mine, and I'm starting to get a bit cold.

                    BTW I had to turn down owner's suite tickets for the Coke 400. It's really hard being the vanguard agent for an invading interstellar race.

                    1. Florida Man   10 years ago

                      You passed on NASCAR?!? I thought you were from Florida?!? Also here is your lamp.

                    2. mr lizard   10 years ago

                      Thank you helpful mammal

                      **crawls back on branch***

                      Yes world domination overrides my homeland instincts...and the Honey Cheetah I'm seeing has informed me that we have other plans.

              3. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

                They are all one person, and that person is a dude. Everyone knows that.

                1. DEG   10 years ago

                  And he lives in his mom's basement.

                  1. Pathogen   10 years ago

                    Which is inside PB's head.. which is in his mom's basement..

                    1. Chumby   10 years ago

                      Mobile homes have basements?

      2. Juvenile Bluster   10 years ago

        My wife is one!

        1. WoodchipperFocus(ed)   10 years ago

          Mine as well.

      3. Agammamon   10 years ago

        We need a [female] tag to be able to keep track of them all. Or at least a counter on the H & R page.

        Its like ladies' night promotions. 'C'mon in guys, its not a *complete* sausage fest in here.'

        1. Rhywun   10 years ago

          Hmph. Some of us come just for the sausage fest. Although sometimes I feel like this is like the worst gay chat room ever.

          1. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

            Like space docking is gay.

          2. Agammamon   10 years ago

            Well, the tag would help then - you'd know where to be hunting.

        2. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

          So we have enough for a calendar then?

      4. MoriahJovan   10 years ago

        Me.

      5. MarkLastname   10 years ago

        I still maintain that they're all men playing make believe. Not that I ever do that or anything.

        1. MoriahJovan   10 years ago

          *pulls dainty lace panties down, searches for dick*

          Nope. Not surgically removed, either. Also, two bouts of natural childbirth. I'm not forgetting that anytime soon.

          1. Marshall Gill   10 years ago

            pulls dainty lace panties down

            Go on....

    5. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

      Thanks to Nick as well.

      Jeez, woman.

    6. flye   10 years ago

      I haven't commented here in months, but I just wanted to drop in and say good luck, we're all counting on you.

      1. mr lizard   10 years ago

        Be sure to order the fish while you're at it.

        1. gaoxiaen   10 years ago

          Don't order the soup.

      2. BiMonSciFiCon   10 years ago

        I picked a bad week to stop drinking.

        1. Woodchippin' 4 Jesus   10 years ago

          Bottoms up

        2. Chumby   10 years ago

          I picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue.

    7. Juvenile Bluster   10 years ago

      Congrats, Banjos. Hopefully the kid looks like you and not Sloopy.

    8. Bronwyn   10 years ago

      Congratulations, mama!

    9. Catatafish & Woodchips   10 years ago

      Congrats on the new addition!

  98. mr lizard   10 years ago

    Come on you worthless warm-blooded feed stock. Do you want to live forever. Join us in digitally defecating on this bumbling no-talent ass clown of a beaurocrat. He lacks the granite phallic accessories to order his laser tag warriors to attack the offices of those who offend him prior to gagging said mammals. May he be remembered as a fornicator of wool producing mammals

  99. Agammamon   10 years ago

    First, let me apologize (again) for putting Reason in this position in the first place. While this often feels like a public forum, I forgot that my actions can have harmful consequences for other people even if I escape unscathed.

    Secondly - "The comments are hyperbolic, in questionable taste?and fully within the norms of Internet commentary."

    Here's someone who's willing to acknowledge the truth. Those comments were distasteful, but fully within the bounds of modern internet culture and not some weird, worrisome aberration.

    There's a hashtag labelled #KillAllWhitePeople for feth's sake.

    This vegan is calling for the extermination of people who eat meat.

    http://www.thegatewaypundit.co.....at-eaters/

    This guy wants to set adrift in the sea people who demand graphical fidelity over gameplay in videogames

    We should just stick all these graphics kiddies on some ice, and float them out to see... as the eskimo's before us.

    http://steamcommunity.com/app/.....446885/#p2

    The thing is, internet culture is vastly different from 'face-to-face-' culture.

    Those of us who spend a lot of time talking to people in asymmetric conversations have come to understand what those of you who do all your conversations either one-way (article writing) or face to face haven't internalized.

    1. Agammamon   10 years ago

      "Normal Person + Anonymity + Audience = Total Fuckwad"

      http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/GIFT

      And quite frankly, Reason's comment section is near the top of the heap in terms of politeness and quality of discourse - order's of magnitude better than pretty much any one else's un-moderated comment section while avoiding the pitfalls of group-think that heavily moderated forums have.

      1. A Self-Identified $park?   10 years ago

        Dude, the anonymity has nothing to do with people being total fuckwads. People are total fuckwads, the Internet just expands the audience they get to play to.

        1. Agammamon   10 years ago

          Its not positing a *causation* of fuckwaddedness, its simply pointing out that when you have the trifecta the fuckwaddedness is *amplified*.

          There's people that we yell and scream at and insult here that if we met in real life we'd probably be OK having a beer with.

          1. gaoxiaen   10 years ago

            Or a fistfight, which is also fun.

      2. Bronwyn   10 years ago

        For the love o' Pete, you don't have anything to apologize for!

        1. Rhywun   10 years ago

          FWIW, I won't apologize for my perfectly anodyne comment.

          1. Florida Man   10 years ago

            Is there a defense fund setup for the [redacted] 6?

          2. BuSab Agent   10 years ago

            Of course you shouldn't. But since your connection to the Dark Powers has been outed, can you be bribed to put in a bad word or two?

          3. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

            Nor should you Rhywun. Fuck them.

            1. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

              And by them I mean the piece of shit prosecutors.

      3. Florida Man   10 years ago

        It's a common fucking expression. See "pulp fiction" and the Malibu scene. Fuck!

      4. Agammamon   10 years ago

        If I invited you to a party and you pissed in my bushes, I'd at least expect an apology - even if its totally legal, its simply impolite to do so.

        1. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

          You did nothing wrong. NOTHING.

        2. BuSab Agent   10 years ago

          If you wanted to piss in my bushes, I'd point out the correct ones to use. Human pee is excellent critter repellent.

      5. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

        While an apology is thoughtful it's not necessary.

        1. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

          If anything those bozo-clowns owe YOU an apology.

          1. ant1sthenes   10 years ago

            Who, Reason? Because that's who he was apologizing to.

            1. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

              No. The government.

    2. Catatafish & Woodchips   10 years ago

      Ag, personally I don't think you have one damn thing to apologize for. One of the understood benefits of the First Amendment is the ability to vent. Anyone with half a fucking frontal lobe could see that's what you, Rhywun, et al were doing.

      Unfortunately the Southern District of NY apparently does not have the brain specs listed in my preceding sentence.

      1. Geoff Nathan   10 years ago

        Agreed. Now I'm heading over to the donation page to give them even more money. And I give them quite a bit already. Sorry you got caught in this shit. Hang in there--you and your co-victims.

      2. Whahappantomychipper?   10 years ago

        It's not a lack of brains. It's a lack of integrity. These people are intentionally evil, not stupid.

    3. Warty   10 years ago

      STOP APOLOGIZING

      1. Woodchippin' 4 Jesus   10 years ago

        AMEN! Defense of liberty is NO FUCKING VICE.

        1. Marshall Gill   10 years ago

          Not just defense of liberty but "Extremism in the defense of Liberty is no vice, and let me remind you also that moderation in pursuit of Justice is no virtue."

    4. Woodchippin' 4 Jesus   10 years ago

      Those who know and love you best understand you're a marshmallow and a goof. Kind but cranky. All talk, no bite. You're the guy who's afraid of spiders and mice, so much so you gently persuade them into a Ball mason jar and escort them out of doors.

      So, you owe us no apologies. It could have been anyone one of us ,"special place in hell".

      1. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

        Marshmallow? Are you calling him a fatty?

        1. Woodchippin' 4 Jesus   10 years ago

          Marshmallows are good. Multi-purpose. Great fish bait. Or Jello molders. Rocky road ice cream. S'mores.

          Marshmallows are very pliable.

      2. Florida Man   10 years ago

        It could have been anyone one of us

        preach brother.

        1. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

          It true and infuriating.

    5. Ken Shultz   10 years ago

      Any one of us could have ended up on that subpoena.

      They refused to drop someone from consideration for saying there's an especially hot place in hell for rotten judges.

      There was no set standard they were going by--certainly not by logic or law.

      "The hottest place in Hell is reserved for those who remain neutral in times of great moral conflict."

      http://www.brainyquote.com/quo.....WJquzAD.99

      Martin Luther King Jr could have been on that subpoena.

      TOBAS is a recognized acronym--and idiomatic. It can be used for anything--like crappy cars. My car should be TOBAS.

      When people say, "Heads should roll for this", that isn't a violent threat either, but people say it all the time--especially about government officials and their shitty choices.

      This prosecutor's office has run off its rails. And someday we'll find out why.

      1. Agammamon   10 years ago

        This guy could be in trouble.

        http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/n.....-and-shot/

        After all, sec 875 criminalizes threats in interstate and *international* commerce.

        And the law is pretty clear that a violation committed in multiple jurisdictions can be tried in the jurisdiction it was started in, finished in, or any of the intervening jurisdictions.

        So, is The Telegraph going to get a subpoena also?

    6. Djucational Woodchipper   10 years ago

      It is the Southern District of New York that should be apologizing to you and Reason magazine. Not the other way around.

      1. Agammamon   10 years ago

        I'm not apologizing to the USA nor Judge Forrest, just to Reason Magazine for the inconvenience and expense caused.

    7. Pi Guy   10 years ago

      Holy crap, don't you dare apologize.

      This had nothing to do with what you said. It had to do with to whom you said it. I think I speak on behalf of many, if not all, that you should never be in fear of exercising your 1A rights. That you are is a sign that our elected and appointed leaders have given up all pretext of defending our rights.

      We've reached the point where they've ignored the intent of the Constitution while simultaneously forgetting that it's that very same document which grants them that power. If they can ignore it, we should ignore. No wonder they want to ignore the Second Amendement.

    8. tumescence chipper   10 years ago

      Those comments were distasteful,

      Those comments reflected the only possible emotional response that any reasonable person could have in reaction to the whole fucking travesty.

      She is evil. The state which has put Ulbricht in prison for life is evil. It's ok to wish mean and hateful things upon her.

      Hypothetically speaking of course.

      1. tumescence chipper   10 years ago

        For example

        Every single time I read about judges and DEA and prosecutors putting people in jail for prescribing or possessing "too many painkillers" I truly do hope they end up writhing in pain from an awful cancer and can't get pain meds for it. FUCK them they are evil. Truly evil.

        it's ok to stand by offhand internet comments you made that condemn actual, real-life evil acts committed by our government and its agents.

      2. jester   10 years ago

        I don't necessarily have to assign the word evil. Conflict of interest is enough. She's the real pirate as I maintained all along.

    9. Limpee Wiltstock   10 years ago

      Bullcrap. I heard worse'n this as a boy at the card table or even at the oldster's table at the inn in the morning. And much worse in just regular get togethers with folks. I can't imagine what kind of silly culture you mus live in day-to-day where everyone's always kindly, prim, and proper and cautious never to make any suggestions anyone might think of as extreme or outlandish. Though I have been frequently astounded by the reactions of a few select persons who seem to pretend to be flabbergasted and offended at any improper speech or strong sentiment, but these seem to be always members of a sort of superpretentious middle class, very class conscious and determined to prove themselves part of some enlightened and pussified elite. At the same time, I should disclose that I heard a lot less use of those half dozen words considered to be bad words by those who do such considering. In fact, I remember a lot of adults around when I was a child who never spoke those words, so far as I know, though some of those same folks put forth the most grisly and shocking suggestions about this or that thing that ought to come to pass for this or that badly behaving public servant, things far beyond the light shrimp cocktail party humour here, and which in many cases were clearly unhyperboly. F anything, I see more moderation and agonising over propriety and comportment in internet discussions than I see in most regular fleshly social intercourses amongst plain folk.

  100. Woodchippin' 4 Jesus   10 years ago

    Well, Matt - you DID want something more interesting when you got your jury summons last month.

    Seems like it was a thousand years ago . . .

  101. In League with the Dark Ones   10 years ago

    It's worth stressing that, under established legal precedent, Reason.com (like any other website) is generally not legally responsible for reader comments posted at our site.

    Not for much longer.

    1. Catatafish & Woodchips   10 years ago

      More ammunition for the "look at how Europe does things better" numbskulls.

    2. Migrant Log Chipper   10 years ago

      No shit, who needs the FCC to fuck up the interwebz...the EU is already on it.

  102. Robert   10 years ago

    Is Gayle Sproul related to John C. Sproul?

    1. MSimon   10 years ago

      It is a European thing. Brussels.

  103. Ch?d Whipper   10 years ago

    Excellent!

  104. Ken Shultz   10 years ago

    I know you can't sue prosecutors personally for malicious prosecution, but you can sue the government for that, can't you?

    If so, the Reason Six might hope they get indicted. I'd expect the charges to be dismissed at arraignment on the basis of well established First Amendment case law, and that point, maybe it's jackpot time.

    You'd think this would be a really fine line to walk for the prosecutors. If they don't make something out of this, them they walk away with egg all over their faces, and if they take it to court, they're likely to be laughed right out of the building.

    I should also point out that as trial balloons go, I was pretty impressed with the fair treatment our fellow commenters got. Even at places like NPR, where I expected the commenters to be nasty as hell to us, they were, I'd say, wholly sympathetic to the cause of the commenters rather than the government.

    This case appears to be a loser for the prosecutors in the court of public opinion, as well as in the Constitution and the case law.

    1. Mad Scientist   10 years ago

      They did this for the nuisance "don't fuck with us" effect. They have no plans to actually prosecute anyone. It was pure bullying.

      1. ant1sthenes   10 years ago

        Well, they have no plans to prosecute anyone for this. But four felonies a day, and all that.

      2. MarkLastname   10 years ago

        A part of me thinks this is one reason why a prosecutor may be judged by the proportion (not number certainly) of convictions. A judge who grants or prosecutor who initiates a lot of subpoenas or indictments that don't get followed through is a bad judge or prosecutor, as either they're not doing their job well, or their using the threat of the process as a punishment in itself (even worse).

        Personally, trite as it may seem, a lot of this probably has to do with the pop culture love of prosecutors and judges; they're 'the good guys' in all the movies and TV. They get cheered on when they violate people's rights.And people eat it up. So they'll let the justice system get away with anything. Oh, it's only detective Stabler torturing some suspect to save the child he has hidden in a crate somewhere, or whatever. So it's no surprise these 'public servants' view themselves as noble crusaders to whom rules don't apply. Deep down, it's a problem with the general public and its attitudes more than anything else I suspect.

    2. Woodchippin' 4 Jesus   10 years ago

      Charles Cooke, National Review. I love that English bloke defending the 1st amendment.

      Frankly, I think he's a libertarian. A stealth libertarian.

      1. Woodchippin' 4 Jesus   10 years ago

        His best line - THIS SUBPOENA IS BLOODY UN-AMERICAN!!!!

      2. Pathogen   10 years ago

        "Frankly, I think he's a libertarian. A stealth libertarian."

        Of course he's a Cosmotarian.. There's an "E" on the end of his "Cook"..

        Curved. Swords..

    3. Old Man With Gag Order   10 years ago

      I know you can't sue prosecutors personally for malicious prosecution, but you can sue the government for that, can't you?

      The bar for that is so high that you might as well ask a quadriplegic to polevault 19 feet.

  105. Rockabilly   10 years ago

    While at law school, District Court Judge Katherine Forrest, studied and admired the communist constitution.

    She believes that only centralized government with central planning can run a country and its once free citizens.

    1. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

      She believes that only centralized government with central planning can run a country and its once free citizens.

      Unfortunately she's got a lot of company.

  106. Emmerson Biggins   10 years ago

    Woodchippers Unite!

    1. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

      Woodchippers of the world
      Unite and take over.
      Woodchippers of the world
      Hand it over, hand it over, hand it over.

      -horribly effeminate Morrissey voice

  107. Troy Woodchipper   10 years ago

    (we say that as writers whose work and physical shortcomings rarely escape unscathed from any thread)

    Nick, this is not the time or the place to talk about your unibrow.

    1. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

      I think Nick just fired a shot at Rico's hair.

  108. In League with the Dark Ones   10 years ago

    Gillespie noted that Forrest "more than threw the book" at Ulbricht by giving him a life sentence, which was a punishment "beyond even what prosecutors...asked for."

    I hope that's grounds for appeal based on the Eighth Amendment.

  109. SIV   10 years ago

    Did threaded commenting ensnare Rhywun by placing his benign comment in the "context of a conspiracy"?

  110. SIV   10 years ago

    Did threaded commenting ensnare Rhywun by placing his benign comment in the "context of a conspiracy"?

    1. Migrant Log Chipper   10 years ago

      The skewrlz need to be interrogated.

  111. Stephen B.   10 years ago

    Reason was "free" to tell the story all along, they simply chose not to bear the consequences. Is this not the very definition of fair-weather patriotism? As Ed Snowden adjusts to life in Russia, and Julian Assange starts his fifth year in detention without trial, and Chelsea Manning continues to rot away in Leavenworth, this story makes it easy to discern who are the real libertarian patriots.

    1. Mad Scientist   10 years ago

      So, your position is that it would have been better if Nick and Matt had gone to jail than if they had waited a few days and then told the whole tale?

    2. Juvenile Bluster   10 years ago

      Fuck off. I don't exactly expect the Reason Foundation to emigrate over this, do you?

    3. triclops   10 years ago

      Indeed, if only we could be as brave as the anonymous internet fuckstick, Stephen B., expects we should.

    4. Sevo   10 years ago

      Care to tell us YOUR efforts?

      1. Pathogen   10 years ago

        Snuffing legal fires with courageous bluster..

        1. Sevo   10 years ago

          You'll also notice that Assange is NOT confined as a result of his efforts to spread the word, but supposedly for his efforts to spread some legs.

      2. MarkLastname   10 years ago

        As a matter of fact, Stephen is an American hero, and he is typing these very comments from a cell at Guantanamo Bay where he sits for protesting the patriot act; he is typing it on an iphone he smuggled in in his asshole. I know because I'm his cellmate, and I sometimes spend time in his asshole as well.

    5. AFSlade   10 years ago

      Stephen B. - I agree in a strictly logical sense with you: they could have said "fuck it" and just printed it all along. I wish they had - BUT, doing so might very well have landed them in jail. And gotten this site shut down. I wish Reason had taken that tack and forced the government to either sit the fuck down and shut up or to actually ask a federal judge to start throwing journalists in jail for contempt.

      OTOH, Stephen, it's kinda douchey to talk about how someone else should have been courageous when you're not the one in the crosshairs. You won't find many guys in the military talking about how some other guy wasn't brave enough to rush out in front of the machine-gun nest. We'll all sing the praises of the guy that does - and acknowledge what an amazing act it was - but let's not pretend like everyone is wiling to be martyred for their cause - or that their cowards if they don't.

      If you haven't had to face that choice (and I don't know you from a hole in the ground), it's a bit much to imply what you did. I get you're entitled to your opinion, but talking about other people's cowardice from behind the keyboard without some other context is too much.

      Yet I agree with the principle you're stating. I wish they had. It won't change until we start truly standing the fuck up to this stuff.

    6. Sevo   10 years ago

      BTW, over on Paul's blog, we get:
      "Oh, those girly, gossipy libertarians!

      Irish Says Enough Woodchippers|6.13.15 @ 7:17PM
      So that Tulpa thread went to some dark places. I especially like this part where Tulpa starts blubbering about his many enemies, I call him out for sounding absurdly paranoid, and he claims that criticizing him for being insane makes me an 'asshole.'...

      Francisco d'Anconia|6.13.15 @ 7:39PM
      Tulpa is a victim.

      Warty|6.13.15 @ 7:47PM
      Tulpa is a sad sad man. I wouldn't punch him in the face if we ever met, out of pity for him. Probably.

      How embarrassing. Maybe it's for the best after all that the outside world isn't focusing on Reason in their time of crisis."
      ------------------------------------
      Perhaps one of our most pathetic wanna-bes is gloating?

  112. Sevo   10 years ago

    Jeeze, go away for a couple of hours and come back to find the assholes identified and their assholish behavior detailed!

    1. edchipper   10 years ago

      Yup

    2. mr lizard   10 years ago

      You're surrounded by assholes

  113. ShitInBhararasMouth   10 years ago

    Look, everybody, I have reliable reason to believe that this happened precisely because Phreet Bharara and Niketh Velamoor deeply, deeply love for libertairnas to shit in their wide open mouths.

    Bharara and Niketh totally cream for libertarian shit in their mouths. Bharara and Niketh feel so inferior to libertarians, for obvious reasons. So Bharara and Niketh both totally fucking explode from the taste of hot libertarian shit down their waiting, needing, pulsing statist throats.

    Bharara and Niketh were super angry that Barrett Brown refused to shit in their mouths, so now they hold a grudge against libertarians. Hot libertarian shit down his gullet makes Bharara dribble hot statist cum out of his very modest statist dick.

    So my only advice to the commenters who were subpoenaed, show up at Bharara's office with a cheerful office, and drink lots of coffee beforehand.

  114. Brandybuck   10 years ago

    I hear this is a rowdy board? Does that mean I can say "winkle" and "tata" here?

    1. All-Seeing Woodchipper   10 years ago

      *gasp*

    2. Florida Man   10 years ago

      Buddy, you can brandy my buck for all I care. It basically means space docking. Don't look that up at work.

    3. mr lizard   10 years ago

      I'm not sure. We recently approved sweater kittens, and almost had to redefine fun bags... So maybe.

      1. Aloysious   10 years ago

        Call them sweater puppies.

        "Lizards is so stoopid." /Yosemite Sam voice

        1. mr lizard   10 years ago

          It was SusanM's idea... And I'm assuming she has a little more authority on the subject

          1. Aloysious   10 years ago

            *sigh*

            Now I find I am going to have to explain patriarchal white male cis-penile heterosexual privilege to an alien lizard that eats bugs while the wimminz do what they are told and make sandwiches barefoot in the kitchen.

            1. Pathogen   10 years ago

              Alabama?

            2. mr lizard   10 years ago

              Umm have you ever tried to order around a large female reptile?...

  115. All-Seeing Woodchipper   10 years ago

    I'm proud of Reason and their attorney for acting quickly to notify the affected commenters when I'm sure it would have been much less risky to just buckle to the intimidation.

    This site is loaded, every single day, with stories about government over-reach and abuse of power. So I know it's real. Even so, it's still more nauseating to see up close and personal.

    The very idea of a government-issued "gag order" is fucking un-American. It is disgusting that this is where we find ourselves.

  116. PapayaSF   10 years ago

    Thank you to Nick and Matt for your efforts. I know this all must have been a stressful event for you and the rest of the staff. Contrary to just a few voices here, I think you did the right things.

    I am pretty confident that the commenters involved will be vindicated, hopefully without too much trouble and expense. If they do have expenses at the end of all this, I'd suggested setting up a GoFundMe page. (Assuming GoFundMe isn't politically opposed to helping libertarians.)

    And I'll agree with those who say this is a great place. I wish some people would be a tad more polite when they disagree, and try to avoid mud-slinging at even our resident trolls (and especially at me, when I deviate from the party line), but you're all a great gang, anyway.

    1. Florida Man   10 years ago

      Yup. I'll chip in for the [redacted] 6.

  117. mr lizard   10 years ago

    Congratulations Stooopid mammals you have achieved half of your pathetic goal of 1000 comments. May your snark be etched in the future ruins of your cities

  118. All-Seeing Woodchipper   10 years ago

    Heh, I was just perusing popehat's twitter feed and noticed that clarkhat used the tag #TeamWoodchipper

    1. mr lizard   10 years ago

      Sounds a little gay... NTTATWWT

  119. GregoryKoch   10 years ago

    I remember at some point in high school, we had to watch a Muppets video where Ms. Piggy tried to read Shakespeare without her glasses, completely mangled it to the point where it made no sense, and exclaimed "Whoever wrote this should be shot!" Are the Feds going to breathe down her neck next?

    1. mr lizard   10 years ago

      Look if they haven't arrested her for domestic violence, what makes you think they're gonna pester her for that?

  120. EndTheGOP   10 years ago

    Thank you for the notice Reason. It looks like the Bureaucrat Pigs win again. This is officially my last comment on ANY blog anywhere until such a time when my First Amendment rights are restored.

    FUCK YOU PIGS!

    1. Pathogen   10 years ago

      "This is officially my last comment on ANY blog anywhere until such a time when my First Amendment rights are restored."

      And the office of the U.S. Attorney, SDNY thanks you for seeing it their way, and voluntarily opting to rescind your First Amendment rights. They'll get to work on restoring your rights.. sometime.. in the future..

      1. EndTheGOP   10 years ago

        Pathogen -- That's better than them hauling me away to jail for speaking my mind. I refuse to harness my speech. Better just to move on, shut up and wait until the revolution comes. I'll be ready. Will you?

        Ok, I lied before. But this really is my last comment.

        1. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

          Who was it that used to always say it was their comment? I forget.

          1. MarkLastname   10 years ago

            Hitler?

          2. SugarFree   10 years ago

            Edward, who also handle-hopped as Lefiti, Morris and numerous others.

            1. jester   10 years ago

              joe. It was joe.

  121. Gozer the Gozerian   10 years ago

    Better Call Sproul!

    1. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

      Well done.

  122. Woodchippin' 4 Jesus   10 years ago

    It's not a victory, friends, so quit uncorking that champagne. Preet got exactly what he wanted in the end, didn't he?

    1. mr lizard   10 years ago

      They'll never get what they want, but they'll see Rome burn

      1. Pathogen   10 years ago

        Nobody gets cake.. ever..

    2. Brochettaward   10 years ago

      Yes and no. They got the information and will get to harass the six commenters. Though, they will lose that case.

      In the long run, they wanted Reason to fold up and consent without raising a peep. This apparently is not some uncommon event, but something where other media outlets and corporations have just folded without going public. So, at the least, some attention has been brought to this issue and the internet is mocking them in most corners.

    3. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

      They gained nothing. All they did was offer more proof to the world that the governments sole function is to oppress. We were not the only ones to notice this.

      1. jester   10 years ago

        Bharara fucked up any possibility of ever being a SCOTUS.

  123. Suthenboy   10 years ago

    All this and only 556 comments? Us Peanuts need to up our game. This thread should be 1000+ comments. And donations.

    Ok Welch and Gillespie I am going to donate now. You did the right thing and then some. You took the path of real no-shit heroes.

    *turns off woodchipper and wheels it back into the shed*

    "Reason's unmoderated comment space is rare among comparable publications and has, over the years, developed into a forum that is by turns exciting, intellectually advanced, outlandish, cringe-inducing, and more foul-mouthed than any locker room this side of the Crab Nebula. It is something to be celebrated as a voluntary community that can be engaged or ignored as the spirit moves you (we say that as writers whose work and physical shortcomings rarely escape unscathed from any thread). However trollish many of our commenters can be, they have created a sphere of free speech that delivers on one of the great promises of the Internet, which is unbridled expression, dialogue, and argument."

    For that I thank you very much.

    1. mr lizard   10 years ago

      Your Future Reptilian Overlords have informed me that this intergalactic backwater of a website is in fact the most the most foul-mouthed location on this side of the Crab Nebula.

      1. juris imprudent   10 years ago

        Mmmm, crab.

    2. Hayeksplosives   10 years ago

      I'm commenting just to help up the total toward 1000.

      I work for a company that works for the Fed, and yes, I'm one of the millions whose data was hacked from the Office of Personnel Management by the Chinese recently. Yay! Thank goodness for pre-emptive fraud alerts on credit reports.

      Anyhoo, I walked into my employment pretty much knowing that every communication I make is monitored by the govt, and in my case, fairly so.

      However, I don't think that should be the case with American citizens who don't enter into that voluntary agreement with the govt. We are free to choose.

      1. Hayeksplosives   10 years ago

        By the "Fed" i mean the federal gov't in defense, not the Federal Bank.

      2. juris imprudent   10 years ago

        I don't think you are the only commenter in that situation.

    3. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

      Amen

  124. Alan   10 years ago

    As one of those targeted I would like to make a few statements:

    1 - my comments were in no way a threat. They were a prediction based on history. Water flows downhill, persons who commit crimes against humanity often pay a price for it. The Nuremberg Laws made genocide legal, but those who enabled genocide were prosecuted all the same at the Nuremberg Trials.

    2 - the prosecution of Ulbricht was not just one front in the Drug War, but an attack on vulnerable populations that use the Dark Web to protect themselves from persecution. Everyone should consider the implications of this most recent incident. Websites seriously interested in free discussion should automatically erase all IP logs instantly, and perhaps relocate to the Dark Web. It is now clear that acting lawfully is not sufficient in the eyes of the "authorities".

    3 - my posts were not anonymous just because I didn't include my full name and address. I had no need to be anonymous. All the same, I never received the email because that email address is no longer accessible. I do appreciate the staff of Reason for trying to do as best they were able under the circumstances.

    4 - I will now retire this account and no longer post here. I will see if I can move up my timetable to leave the United States. These recent actions have reconfirmed my impression that the United States does not operate under the Rule of Law, and sadly it appears that things will get much worse before they get better.

    Good Luck.

    1. mr lizard   10 years ago

      Good luck upstart mammal. May you prevail in the fight against those amateur statist which you have offended.

    2. Suellington   10 years ago

      Sorry for the bullshit trouble you have been going through. I also commented a number of times on that same thread. Just really disgusting that anything there could have ever been considered a real threat. Where you heading to, if you don't mind the question?

    3. Sevo   10 years ago

      All the best, Alan.

    4. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

      Good luck.

      Thus we see the collateral damage caused by jerk offs who shouldn't be anywhere near position of control and power.

      And what did they gain from it exactly? Are Americans safer by their insidious and their bullying tactics?

      This is the part of the story I can't accept.

      And fuck that judge and may she find much unhappiness in her miserable life. If I haven't made my feelings clear already.

      1. MarkLastname   10 years ago

        I don't know about you, but I sleep safer knowing that the street gangs will get some business back now that their online competition has been dashed. It's about time the government stepped in to right that wrong; poor street dealers getting put out of business by improving the technology of the business.

    5. Chipper Gore (Suthenboy)   10 years ago

      Hate to see you go Alan, but good luck to you.

    6. coloraDOOM   10 years ago

      Best of luck to you and yours.

    7. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

      Best of luck to you Alan. Everyone knows those were not real threats. I agree the US does not operate under the rule of law and certainly pays no heed to the US constitution. I have to wonder if they even teach the Bill of Rights in law school anymore. Those assholes certainly feel free to shit all over it.

    8. Djucational Woodchipper   10 years ago

      The best of luck to you. Hopefully things will change here.

    9. jester   10 years ago

      Seriously, don't give up. You could've been an ex-pat in Costa Rica, and the long arm of Yankee justice would still somehow fuck with you. Do it...for the children!

  125. Bam!   10 years ago

    We still don't know why the comment section of a small magazine ended up on the desk of a government lawyer, do we?

    1. Sevo   10 years ago

      I'd say the 'small' mag is really a lot 'bigger' than it seems to us, and it seems to be hitting 'em where it hurts to get this sort of attention.
      But given the web attention, I'm betting that whoever was the trigger is not real proud of it right now.

      1. Suellington   10 years ago

        The most definite silver lining in all this is the increased exposure of this frickin awesome website and mag.

      2. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

        "hitting 'em where it hurts"

        That's exactly right. And if they thought we were assholes before....

    2. Djucational Woodchipper   10 years ago

      Tony is a spy. It's the only possible explanation.

      1. Limpee Wiltstock   10 years ago

        They don't pay him enough.

      2. Limpee Wiltstock   10 years ago

        They don't pay him enough.

        1. jester   10 years ago

          They don't pay him enough.

        2. jester   10 years ago

          They don't pay him enough.

  126. Suellington   10 years ago

    Right on Reason! I will be sending in my donation this weekend. These comment boards have given me a lot of laughs and some great info to boot. Keep up the good work.

  127. JwoodchipperD   10 years ago

    I wood chip in for the [redacted] 6.

    I'm almost always the smartest person in the room. But not when I come to reason.com and read some of the comments here. I always laugh and I always learn something.

    1. juris imprudent   10 years ago

      Your handle brought to mind the late JsubD. I can only imagine him spinning in his grave at this.

      1. Woodchipped Buscemi   10 years ago

        If you listen in the soft evening breeze, really closely, you can hear the immortal words -

        FUCK OFF, SLAVER!

      2. jester   10 years ago

        JsubD: another reason this site is great. What other site would recognize a regular contributor who died alone and commented from the public library?

  128. DaFelon   10 years ago

    I found Reason.com because of this story. Thier evil plans are working against them. My up-most support and respect for this website.

    1. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

      That's awesome. Welcome!

  129. bflat879   10 years ago

    Personally, I don't put anything on the internet I won't take responsibility for. I understand "freedom of speech" however I also don't necessarily people have freedom of speech to say things they won't take responsibility for saying.

    I know there are people who will disagree with me on this, and that's fine. I also commend Reason for taking the steps they did. No government agency should believe that getting this information is that easy, they should have to jump through hoops and comply with all existing law.

    Thank you Reason for doing the right thing and, to the commenters in question, have freedom of speech comes with responsibilities, think about that.

    1. Sevo   10 years ago

      "[...]have freedom of speech comes with responsibilities,[...]"

      Fail!
      Freedoms are unalienable, they are not bargained-for, they are not granted by the government, they in no way come with any 'responsibilities' at all.
      The are *freedoms*, not leashes.
      And the ability to post anonymously is the ability to say things slavers don't like and not have the jack-boots kicking down your door in the middle of the night.

    2. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

      "have freedom of speech comes with responsibilities,"

      I don't think you quite grasp how freedom works.

      It's okay. It took me a while too.

    3. Pathogen   10 years ago

      "Thank you Reason for doing the right thing and, to the commenters in question, have freedom of speech comes with responsibilities, think about that."

      Who defines the nature, and scope of those responsibilities?.. think about that..

    4. Chipper Gore (Suthenboy)   10 years ago

      It is great that you congratulate Reason bflat879, but I don't think some of those words you are using mean what you think they mean. Also, I love the condescending lecture. I will think about it.

      *I am guessing drive-by troll, probably that cowardly and reprehensible piece of shit Velamoor*

      1. Sevo   10 years ago

        Chipper Gore (Suthenboy)|6.19.15 @ 9:58PM|#
        "[...]but I don't think some of those words you are using mean what you think they mean[...]"

        I'll bet it was the "however" that gave it away, right? Sort of like the 'libertybutts' (Credit! Someone claim credit!); 'I support free speech, but'.

        1. Pathogen   10 years ago

          Everything after But, is shit..

          1. Sevo   10 years ago

            Yeah, but somebody claimed origination rights to "libertybutts"; they deserve credit!

          2. Sevo   10 years ago

            Oh, and everything BEFORE the But is shit.

    5. Agammamon   10 years ago

      Consider the possibility that a less friendly government (either our own in the future or any number of currently existing foreign) would not stop at a subpoena and move straight to extended imprisonment or execution.

      The right to freedom of speech and the right to privacy/anonymity are two separate rights, but that does not mean you should not be able to exercise both simultaneously (or in conjunction with any of your other rights).

      In many regimes (including what existed in the US prior to and during some of the less savory parts of our history) anonymous speech was/is the only way to actually be able to get out speech critical of the governing class.

      A certain amount of anonymity is necessary in these situations to be able to safely gauge where you stand in relation to the rest of your society. If you're sick of government overreach, maybe you're the only one. Or maybe there are a lot, but if you rise up individually you'll get stomped down individually and the government can claim that you're all outliers. So you coordinate under the table so that multiple complaints can be registered simultaneously and its undeniable how large the opposition is.

      1. Agammamon   10 years ago

        And keep in mind - just because I didn't put my address and phone number in my user handle, that doesn't mean that I was trying to *hide* from anyone (or that anyone who does is trying to).

        I simply compartmentalize different aspects of my life and do not wish an uncontrolled overlap between them. These handles aren't to protect me from consequences, but are intended to limit those consequences to the appropriate sphere. What I do in online commenting politically is separate from what I do with gaming, which is separate from my work-life which is separate from my personal life. I simply do not wish someone who disagrees with me politically to come harass me while I'm relaxing.

        1. Whahappantomychipper?   10 years ago

          And the pieces of shit in the government want to harass you.

      2. jester   10 years ago

        What did publius ever publish?

    6. Limpee Wiltstock   10 years ago

      Publicly, I don't say anything I'm not willing to be heard by anyone, and which I am not willing to defend or repudiate. Also, personally, whatever in hell the distinction between "personally" and "publicly" signifies, a something I can't seem to wrap my fool head around. But it's probably just a side-effect of growing up where as a child I saw TV ads warning about the dangers of talking to "strangers" and was confounded because I never knew anybody that could be truthfully called a "stranger". On the other hand, there got to be some value in anonymous speech, and even if there ain't, there is freedom of expression and freedom of association, which together guarantee that anonymous speech is going to happen, and there's no way to prevent it without abrogating everybody's motherfucking freedoms (and I mean EVERYBODY's).

  130. Derpetologist   10 years ago

    OT: I watched Chris Matthews a hour ago, and once again, he proved that there's regular stupidity and then there's Chris Matthews stupidity.

    His rant went something like: Imagine if we gave everybody a gun before they went to college, or if we gave a gun to everybody when they turned 18, or we gave guns to everyone who walked into a bar. As crazy and dangerous as that sounds, that is exactly what the NRA and the gun lobby want to do. They want everyone to have guns no matter how dangerous or unqualified they might be. It's time for common sense gun control!

    Whatever, Tingles. I really wish he appeared on Jeopardy! again: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kccPhiblpkM

    1. Sevo   10 years ago

      Yeah, well, Tony has us figgered out:
      We want the elderly and chillunz starving on the streets, wymenz and monorities in the kitchen where they belong. And everybody dying since we won't let the government give 'em free birth-control tabs. Or something along those lines.
      Dealing with half-wits like that comes with the territory.

      1. Chipper Gore (Suthenboy)   10 years ago

        He isn't a half-wit..er....ok, he might be, but what galls me about him is his dishonesty. He is a die-hard team player and a liar.
        I haven't looked to see if he commented on Bailey's excellent article today on AGW, but I will check later. I can't wait to see how he hand-waives that all away and calls us deniers again.

        1. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

          Well, his boss is Harvey Birdman - aka Obama.

          Why, Obama's new fib is pimping the 'no advanced nation' perpetuates massacres which such 'frequency' while at the same politicizing the tragedy.

          If the boss acts a certain way so will his or her employees.

          I think we see a clear pattern.

          1. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

            By the way, take a look-see at what Jon Stewart said.

            The emotional prevails over the rational.

            I'm afraid his views (vapid as they are) are the default position for most people on such issues. A senseless murder is so hard to rationalize it leaves you but vulnerable to an emotional response.

            And there's no shortage of incredibly horrible commentary going on in the aftermath of this story almost exclusively from the left and progressives. Naturally.

            1. Sevo   10 years ago

              "A senseless murder is so hard to rationalize it leaves you but vulnerable to an emotional response."

              Which is a wonderful reason for public figures to avoid opening their yaps beyond a statement of sympathy.

              1. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

                I don't get it. Why he went and said all those stupid things so soon after.

                Anyone with a sensible and healthy mind would do a simple research to learn his assertion is not just frivolous but wrong. Which makes me wonder. He has to know what he says is utter bull shit - unless he really is a clueless jackass. So what's he angle? Is it really to 'grab guns'?

                1. Sevo   10 years ago

                  I dunno.
                  There is the presumption that celebs like him do have beliefs and what they say in public reflects those.
                  If you're enough of a cynic, you could presume he's just playing to the audience and has no principles at all.
                  I'm guessing it's a mix; he would really like to say X, but that is beyond what his audience/employers will allow, so he spouts something that is acceptable and doesn't make him avoid looking in the mirror in the morning.
                  But all of this is predicated on the presumption that he is somewhat intelligent, and that could be questioned also.

                  1. jester   10 years ago

                    Some day, he will repent and join us under an anonymous handle.

            2. Marshall Gill   10 years ago

              take a look-see at what Jon Stewart said.

              You mean the propagandist who thinks he is funny? I'll pass.

          2. Chipper Gore (Suthenboy)   10 years ago

            That is no shit. The captain does determine the atmosphere on the ship and they have one hell of a stinky turd for a captain.

          3. kevrob   10 years ago

            BHO is not yet Birdman.

            Right now, he is still Super President .

            After he leaves office, we'll see.

            Kevin R

    2. Pathogen   10 years ago

      "They want everyone to have guns no matter how dangerous or unqualified they might be."

      Well.. many police academy cadets are qualified by NRA instructors..

    3. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

      In a sane society, if 20% of women who go to college were being raped (yeah I know that's bullshit but I digress), we would give them all guns and let them carry on campus.

      1. Muzzled Woodchipper   10 years ago

        This x 1000

      2. jester   10 years ago

        The raped 20% are minorities. That's why they don't care.

    4. Limpee Wiltstock   10 years ago

      F we gae everybody a gun when he turned eighteen (or sixteen, or twelve, or whatever), then this kind of crap would not be happening. I guarantee it. For what it's worth, my father gae each of us a gun when we acheived some level of function. I don't know his criteria, but it ranged between twelve and sixteen, depending upon the doofusness of each of us.

  131. Meriwether3   10 years ago

    I found this turn of events very chilling. Something you write off handedly can become the target of a secret government investigaton. I've said and written enough things by now, and, friends, somewhere in Washington, enshrined in some little folder, is a
    Study in black and white of my
    tweets and H&R comments. Nixon and Hoover would have blushed (and then pumped their fists) at this.
    I really should FOIA the DOJ and FBI for my file. With my luck, it would come back 99% redacted with only very intimidating words and phrases left to be read:
    ? [REDACTED] left for dead in a coop full of ravenous roosters and then [REDACTED]
    ? due to heavy fog and high winds [REDACTED] could not establish a clear shot [REDACTED] and target 'Meriwether' remains ambulatory
    ? subject shows a strong preference for [REDACTED] and egg salad sandwiches.

    Kudos to the Reason staff for handling this the best they could. Kudos to Ken White for shining light into the void. Best of luck to the H&R six and here's hoping they suffer no further ill consequences.

  132. Hank Phillips   10 years ago

    It would be asking too much for internet critics to stay on topic and keep comments relevant. I have to log in, and had hoped the venue was limited largely to subscribers, with non-subscribers at least not being cretins. One class of drugs--made from poppies--is arguably not recreational, genuinely addictive and when legal (as opposed to neither criminalized nor in any way protected by the justice system) has a way of leading to actual warfare because of the involvement of corporations in mixed economies competing over crowds of persons whose addictions amounted to duress. It is a mistake to blithely dismiss that particular fear as superstition just as it was a mistake to jail and shoot people for selling beer in the 1920s or nonaddictive hippie concoctions in later decades.

    1. Sevo   10 years ago

      OK, I'm nominating "Least Self-Aware" for 6/19/15:

      Hank Phillips|6.19.15 @ 9:55PM|#
      "It would be asking too much for internet critics to stay on topic and keep comments relevant. I have to log in, and had hoped the venue was limited largely to subscribers, with non-subscribers at least not being cretins."
      --------------------------------------
      Well, yes, it is asking too much; if you've spent any time here, you'll notice the notation OT ("off topic"), or sometimes folks just wandering off on some free-association, such as:
      -------------------------------------
      "One class of drugs--made from poppies--is arguably not recreational, genuinely addictive and when legal (as opposed to neither criminalized nor in any way protected by the justice system) has a way of leading to actual warfare because of the involvement of corporations in mixed economies competing over crowds of persons whose addictions amounted to duress. It is a mistake to blithely dismiss that particular fear as superstition just as it was a mistake to jail and shoot people for selling beer in the 1920s or nonaddictive hippie concoctions in later decades."

      So in addition to your hypocrisy, we also have you justifying drug laws because governments fight over them?
      Do I have this right?

      1. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

        Yeah. Stay. On. Topic. Sheesh.

        How's the weather in SF?

        1. Sevo   10 years ago

          DELIGHTFUL today, R; had lunch looking out over the bay.
          How's early summer there? Still cool enough for comfort?

          1. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

            Actually it has been cool with more rain than usual. Wreaking havoc on my running/cycling schedule.

            Mediocre weather is a form of micro-aggression I say.

            1. Sevo   10 years ago

              As an old fart, I've used the chill and foggy weather here as an excuse to avoid my neighborhood walks. But then, sooner or later, I can't keep excusing it...

              1. BuSab Agent   10 years ago

                It's rained every fucking day for a week. I'm sewing my own canvas tent and the only thing left is the waterproofing which cannot be done when it's fucking raining all the time. Also floods. But I live on high ground, 'never live on a flood plain or on the bank of a river' my old man said. He was wise.

        2. Pathogen   10 years ago

          Way to derail the thread, asshole.. The topic is "cretins"!
          Alright.. GO!

          1. All-Seeing Woodchipper   10 years ago

            I hear they're going broke.

            1. Pathogen   10 years ago

              Hey.. it happens..

          2. Raymond Luxury Yach-t   10 years ago

            1-2-3-4
            Cretins wanna hop some more
            4-5-6-7
            All good cretins go to heaven

      2. BuSab Agent   10 years ago

        Hmmm. Opium and opium derivatives are the single most effective painkillers on the planet. We should therefore get rid of them, and condemn people with chronic and/or terminal pain management needs to unimaginable suffering because the British Empire was a douchebag. Gotcha.

        1. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

          I thought that dude was just kidding.

        2. Sevo   10 years ago

          I KNEW someone was gonna peg his 'argument'!

          1. juris imprudent   10 years ago

            Not sure he deserves getting pegged by BuSab.

            1. BuSab Agent   10 years ago

              'deserves' got nothing to do with it.

    2. Pathogen   10 years ago

      I like turtles..

      1. Sevo   10 years ago

        "I like turtles.."

        But there's so MANY of them! All the way down...

      2. BuSab Agent   10 years ago

        So do I.

      3. Meriwether3   10 years ago

        Me too. It just pisses me off that people drive over them for sport.

        1. Pathogen   10 years ago

          Yeah, those people suck..

        2. BuSab Agent   10 years ago

          Some of the big snappers around here will seriously fuck up a small car's shit.

          1. BuSab Agent   10 years ago

            * the turtle does not survive the encounter, but he will leave a lasting impression.

            1. Sevo   10 years ago

              And if the remains aren't too bad, they make a wonderful turtle soup!
              Turtle is a non-no in CA. I miss turtle soup like I miss thunder-bumpers from the mid west.

            2. MarkLastname   10 years ago

              [in the voice of the Halo announcer] Instant revenge!

    3. All-Seeing Woodchipper   10 years ago

      Agile Cyborg, if you're going to change your handle for fun you're supposed to put "woodchipper" in it.

      1. Sevo   10 years ago

        Uh, AC is 'frolicking' over on the conscription thread. A bit of AC tends to go a loooooong way in making the thread unreadable.
        I noticed Eddy was there when I looked; help yourself.

    4. Heroic Mulatto   10 years ago

      If I read you correctly, we should factor in the Opium Wars in formulating modern American drug policy?

      1. Christophe   10 years ago

        Of course, because clearly our two options are:

        - Fighting other nations to force them to legalize drugs.
        - Fighting other nations to force them to ban drugs.

        And therefore we must weigh the pros and cons of each alternative.

        1. Heroic Mulatto   10 years ago

          Wong Fei Hung...what more of a pro do you need?

    5. Agammamon   10 years ago

      Wait, you're asking people to stay on topic but . . .

      You veer off into some discussion about drugs made from poppy and how its legalization will lead to open warfare?

  133. some guy   10 years ago

    I know I'm late to the discussion, but I'm not going to read 600+ comments. Apologies if I'm repeating something that's already been said.

    1. The lesson (for us) seems to be that we should immediately ignore all requests to voluntarily gag ourselves when we receive a subpoena. It is important to spread the word far and wide before the gag order arrives.

    2. The lesson (for prosecutors) seems to be that they should obtain and send the gag order before the subpoena, if at all possible.

    3. Could Reason have refused to comply with the subpoena on 5th amendment grounds, asserting their right to not incriminate themselves? If not, why doesn't such a defense work here?

    1. Brochettaward   10 years ago

      I suggest you read all 600+ comments. To set the mood, I recommend some ambient sound:
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0LD57c1KuA8

      1. Brochettaward   10 years ago

        1. Yes. Unless its ordered, fuck'em.

        2. Yea, they kind of dropped the ball. Probably reflects that most usually comply with all of their 'requests.'

        3. No, because Reason is not legally liable for comments. Reason was being subpoenaed for evidence in an 'investigation.' They are a third party in all of this and not incriminated.

      2. All-Seeing Woodchipper   10 years ago

        Huh. Have to admit, I would never have expected "woodchipper" to be a "rest and relaxation" soundtrack.

        1. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

          How about this?

          https://youtu.be/UfKL7wOTWsU

      3. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

        I let out a spontaneous loud laugh. Coulda woken my kid.

    2. Agammamon   10 years ago

      In response to question 3 - you're 5th amendment rights only apply to *self-incrimination*. If you are not going to incriminate yourself (or have been given immunity, as websites have for comments left by others) then you have no right to withhold testimony.

      The only exceptions to this are the spousal/lawyer privilege and a very limited (and not observed in all jurisdictions) doctor/confessor privilege.

  134. Derpetologist   10 years ago

    So, watching Hannity now. Some pastor is arguing that whatshisface wouldn't have killed anybody unless he'd gone to church.

    The pastor says more church. The gun grabbers say more gun control. The SPLC say take down the Confederate flag. Huh. It sure is fascinating that the incident nicely reinforces what they wanted to do beforehand.

    1. Brochettaward   10 years ago

      I think bowl cut just needed some pussy. No one who is neck deep in all the premium or even non-premium pussy they can handle goes on killing sprees. If some of the sleezier women in society would start sexing these misfits, this problem wouldn't exist. At least, we need to legalize prostitution. For the children.

      1. Derpetologist   10 years ago

        Eh, Charles Whitman had a wife & kids, and he still went on a killing spree. Caligula could get whatever he wanted sexually and that did nothing to chill him out. Genghis Khan scored more than any man in history and well, just look at the bones! And then there are plenty of undersexed men who never hurt anybody.

        No, to paraphrase the zookeeper from Bart Gets an Elephant, some people are just jerks.

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E9aGIzMJPFw

        1. Derpetologist   10 years ago

          My bad- Whitman had a wife, but no children.

          1. Brochettaward   10 years ago

            A wife is hardly a guarantee of pussy. Do you want legalized prostitution or not? Stop questioning the narrative.

          2. gaoxiaen   10 years ago

            I think he had a brain tumor.

            1. Brochettaward   10 years ago

              IT'S NOT A TUMOR

              1. Would Larry Wayne Jones?   10 years ago

                GET TO THE CHIPPA!!!!

      2. Derpetologist   10 years ago

        Oh, and I was watching an episode of I Almost Got Away With It about this guy who roamed the country doing check fraud and identity theft. He managed to have two girlfriends at the same time, but the one left him after he shot her with a paintball gun when she was pregnant.

        1. Derpetologist   10 years ago

          Here's the show: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oh8okFCzqtM
          Guy's name was Aurlieas Dante Mclarty.

      3. Agammamon   10 years ago

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MvwUTpMLGKg

    2. Sevo   10 years ago

      "Some pastor is arguing that whatshisface wouldn't have killed anybody unless he'd gone to church."

      But he DID go to church!

      1. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

        For one hour!

      2. Derpetologist   10 years ago

        But Highlander taught us that nothing bad can happen in a church.

        1. Chumby   10 years ago

          Highlander was never an altar boy.

    3. Chipper Gore (Suthenboy)   10 years ago

      They are animists. They believe in magic amulets and ritual behaviors.

      Ascribing the shooters behavior to the obvious and known mental illness he was suffering from would not advance their agendas. None of the people howling about it give two shits for the victims. They are just props for them.

    4. All-Seeing Woodchipper   10 years ago

      This is off topic. Did you clear it with Hank? Are you even a subscriber?

      1. Pathogen   10 years ago

        We were talking about turtles, just before the wheels came off of this thread.. Hank's right, keeping people on topic here is like wrangling cats..

        1. Sevo   10 years ago

          strangling cats?!
          What sort of a............
          Oh...

  135. TruckinMack   10 years ago

    In the future when you get a subpoena asking for information about your commenters, publish it immediately on your website.

    1. All-Seeing Woodchipper   10 years ago

      In the future all subpoenas will be accompanied with gag orders. Why wouldn't they be? In this instance they made a minor slip-up on timing and as a result a few proles got an accidental glimpse behind the curtain. Won't happen again.

    2. Pathogen   10 years ago

      Or, burn it into the surface of the moon with the Kochtopus Deathray hidden in Reasons nefarious arboretum...

      1. BuSab Agent   10 years ago

        I've heard there are turtles in the Arboretum....

        1. Pathogen   10 years ago

          Shh.. there's a gag order on that..

          1. kevrob   10 years ago

            One of the Koch brothers is Chairface Chippendale?

            BTW, the devout know it is Turtles All The Way Down!

            Kevin R

  136. Warrren   10 years ago

    1000th Post!

    1. Meriwether3   10 years ago

      Are you Canadian, Warren? I think you are using the metric post counter.

      1. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

        I think he's confusing the currency exchange with post counted in American. Even then we're at 750 from 1000 which suggest a .75 dollar. But the $C is at around .81 cents.

        1. Warrren   10 years ago

          Maybe I identify as a woman and 750 posts is the same as 1000 posts to me.

          1. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

            Yeah but do you identify as a CANADIAN woman?

            1. Warrren   10 years ago

              I like a good puck?

    2. All-Seeing Woodchipper   10 years ago

      ...coming soon!

      1. All-Seeing Woodchipper   10 years ago

        This Way to the Great Egress!

        1. Sevo   10 years ago

          Gee, are you an ornathopter in your spare time?

          1. Warrren   10 years ago

            Watch your fucking language!

  137. 0x90   10 years ago

    It's fine to sit and try to talk theory about how or why this or that is broken or unjust -- but it's never going to get people very worked up. Every once in awhile, though, you get a couple of true morons blundering onto the scene like this, and providing the perfect object lesson (how could they be so clueless as to what this site is all about?), when they really didn't have to. It's all just so perfect.

    1. All-Seeing Woodchipper   10 years ago

      Unfortunately the object lesson is going to be that even what it's all out in the open, they have the ability to harass innocent citizens and suffer absolutely no consequences for it.

      1. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

        "suffer absolutely no consequences for it."

        Maybe. Maybe not.

        1. Christophe   10 years ago

          Ho ho, someone's trying to get them to send another subpoena.

      2. 0x90   10 years ago

        In the short run, sure, but I'd argue that if that is to ever not be the case, it will only be due to a generally heightened awareness that this is how things really work. Put it this way: nothing will have changed, materially (i.e. with respect to your concerns), by this situation having occurred, so the fact that a couple of state thugs came along and ham-handedly, and very publicly, botched things up -- that can be nothing but a net positive, right?

  138. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

    Okay all, this has gotten out of hand. Please submit your comments to me before I allow them to be posted in the chatroom. We have rules here, people, and I am going to start enforcing them.

    1. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

      "Crusty, it's your doctor. The warts on your back are not warts. They seem to be growing arms. Please call at your earliest convenience." Signed, Crusty's Doctor.

      1. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

        Not approved! Please delete!

    2. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

      I thought Hank was in charge?

      1. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

        Hank was not registered. I am registered.

        1. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

          I think we should let Thunderdome decide

          1. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

            But is the Thunderdome registered?

            1. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

              It identifies as registered.

              1. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

                I cede the authority I never had.

  139. Acosmist   10 years ago

    Weird I never see Bo on the threads about this particular issue.

    1. Sevo   10 years ago

      There are several who are notably absent.
      And they were missing in the immediate aftermath of the subpoenas; perhaps for all the noise, they are just a bit more frightened of exposure than the rest of the commenters?
      As an example, Tony is an ass-licking statist; I can imagine him quivering in fear if anyone of 'authority' were to suspect him of 'wrong thought'. Bo claims a certain courage, but it's obvious from the dismantling of his grad/bar-exam claims that he's an out-and-out liar.
      I think Tulpa showed up on Paul's blog to do a victory lap about how Reason had been handed its hat, only to disappear thereafter. His only interest is revenge on those who properly despise the twit.
      Commie-kid? What do you expect? Any gripe about gov't snooping will get tossed right back in his face.
      Turd? Hard telling. If there isn't an angle leading to "I LUV OBO", he hardly ever shows up

  140. D M Ryan   10 years ago

    Great news. Now, I don't have to create a sockpuppet account named "Wood Chippers In Hell".

    1. juris imprudent   10 years ago

      I was thinking pretty seriously about "Steven King's Woodchipper from Hell" - probably too long.

  141. x4rqcks3f v2.0   10 years ago

    Was busy all day and just heard the news. A donation will be on its way when I sober up.

    Also, I've camouflaged my wood chipper as the ass end of a sheep.

  142. bassasaurusrex   10 years ago

    Guys, you all still have the right to say what you want...as long as it offends no one. Additionally as long as it doesn't speak ill of the repugnant abuses by members of the government. So yes, you are free to say what you want. Just make it all about cat memes and thoughtful discussion about the smelliness of your own flatulence. USA! USA! USA!

    1. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

      I don't think Mr. Lizard appreciates cat related discussions.

  143. Jam   10 years ago

    Sounds like Matt and Nick hide behind 'anonymous' commentators, throw them under the bus while kowtowing to the state (a piece of paper and a voice over a telephone), then congrat themselves for saving the day once a ballsy commentator doubles down and leaks the letter.

    A statist rag run by statist minds. Dance for your master.

    1. Sevo   10 years ago

      Jam|6.19.15 @ 10:59PM|#
      "Sounds like Matt and Nick hide behind 'anonymous' commentators, throw them under the bus while kowtowing to the state (a piece of paper and a voice over a telephone), then congrat themselves for saving the day once a ballsy commentator doubles down and leaks the letter.
      A statist rag run by statist minds. Dance for your master."

      So tell us, Jam, what stand have you taken recently? I'm sure a brave warrior for freedom like you has a long history of brave opposition to the state.
      What might those be, Jam?

      1. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

        Why bother. She is obviously off her meds again.

        1. Jam   10 years ago

          If Matt and Nick used the email to the commentators as cover to just leak the letter to popehat themselves, props on a clean move and I'll hop back on my meds. But I doubt those right wing boot lickers have the wits.

          I fight for liberty every year letting IRS letterhead accumulate on my desk. I don't kowtow to words on paper or voices over a telephone. Call the states bluff. Especially with a publishing button and a 1000 commentators to back you.

          1. Sevo   10 years ago

            Jam|6.19.15 @ 11:47PM|#
            "[...]I fight for liberty every year letting IRS letterhead accumulate on my desk[...]":

            Now, I, personally, command a company of freedom-fighters and we regularly sweep through the neighborhoods of San Francisco, dispatching all who propose the loss of freedom!
            So, now we've both made claims, but my claim is not required to be true for my question to you to be sincere.
            Hint: Put up or shut up.

            1. BuSab Agent   10 years ago

              Sevo, damn it you're not supposed to tell anybody about the 'Fruity Fighting Fairy Militia. What if they come to steal our unicorns!?

          2. juris imprudent   10 years ago

            I'm betting you have enough voices in your head that you don't need any over the telephone.

    2. Pathogen   10 years ago

      But, how do you feel about turtles?

      1. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

        I always like Donatello; I thought it was a good leader.

        1. Pathogen   10 years ago

          Bruh..

          1. kevrob   10 years ago

            I prefer The Terrific Whatsit!

            Kevin R

  144. Brochettaward   10 years ago

    Man mugged, breaks leg in London. NHS refuses to send ambulance:
    "That is the most disappointing thing. At the time I was incredulous. I'm always a defender of the NHS but I want to know why they didn't listen to my call properly."

    http://www.independent.co.uk/n.....32223.html

    1. Sevo   10 years ago

      "I'm always a defender of the NHS but I want to know why they didn't listen to my call properly."

      Suucka!!
      You got what you wanted.

    2. Chipper Gore (Suthenboy)   10 years ago

      "Even if you take them to the Soviet Union and show them the concentration camps, they will not believe it. They will believe it when the military boot is crushing their balls, but not before." - Yuri Bezmenov on useful idiots.

      That is priceless. I love it.

    3. WoodchipperFocus(ed)   10 years ago

      https://youtu.be/zOXtWxhlsUg

  145. Derpetologist   10 years ago

    Surprised no one has made this joke yet:

    First, they came for the woodchippers...

    Anyone in need of a new handle, feel free to use that.

  146. Woodchipped Buscemi   10 years ago

    Late as usual, but commenting from Australia while simultaneously driving a road train and reading 700+ comments.

    To wit -

    Thank you to Reason and it's staff for all that you do. Thank you for this forum. It's a great place to read and hang out, especially on this side of the Crab Nebula.

    Thank you also for being staunch defenders of liberty. It's good to know that there are people like you doing the hard yards of defending a free society. In my 36 years on Spaceship Earth, I have come to find that the liberty loving tribe is a very small one indeed.

    ..... Donation coming your way.

    This whole issue is yet one more on the pile that is affecting the decision making process for my own life. My wife is from Ithaca NY, and she wants to have and raise children there. We are in the process of applying for a Green Card for me. Do I really want to go through with that? Do I want to raise children in a country where Fucksticks like Velamoor (and ALL the rest) are in positions of power and authority? Gives one thought to pause.

    Speaking of said fucksticks - fuck you all. You are petty tyrants who thrive on violence and abuse. You're kind are an aberration to a civilized society.

    Thank you to the 6 and the rest of the commentariat. You're all my kind of scum.

    Also - I patiently await Agile Cyborg's commentary.

    Gordilocks

    1. Pathogen   10 years ago

      First off..

      "commenting from Australia while simultaneously driving a road train and reading 700+ comments."

      Multi-tasking.. Fuck yeah!

      Second off..

      " Do I want to raise children in a country where Fucksticks like Velamoor (and ALL the rest) are in positions of power and authority? Gives one thought to pause."

      Being foreign born, I can under stand that sentiment.. But, for those of us born here, harboring those thoughts as more than rhetoric, are to concede that this country belongs to its' bureaucrats, rather than its' citizens.. Besides, I can't think of anywhere else in the "angloshpere" free of his sort..

      1. Woodchipped Buscemi   10 years ago

        You are sadly correct, that where it regards free speech, USA is teh bestest.

        Given that I love my wife more than I hate the state, I'll more than likely end up in Ithaca regardless. Ithaca being the Mos Eisley of Progressives.

        1. Harvard   10 years ago

          Christ man, Ithaca? Have you considered divorce?

          1. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

            Hey, Ithaca is gorges!

            1. jester   10 years ago

              Have you read The Odyssey?

            2. Old Man With Gag Order   10 years ago

              It's a very nice area. We drove there during our last visit to Allegheny County and it was pretty, the people were friendly, and the nearby Nelson Odeon is GREAT place to see a concert. I'd move there in a New York second.

    2. Agammamon   10 years ago

      Please tell me this is your job.

      http://www.bloomberg.com/news/.....-explained

      1. Woodchipped Buscemi   10 years ago

        Agammon - I drive something which is longer and heavier than Furiosa's War Rig.

        I should put a photo on imgur .... Hold on.

        1. Woodchipped Buscemi   10 years ago

          *Agammamon. Sorry.

        2. Pathogen   10 years ago

          Similar to this? and/or this?

          1. Woodchipped Buscemi   10 years ago

            Yes. Imgur doesn't like my phone.

            My ride = 2007 T904 KW + 3 x 45' flat decks.

            1. Pathogen   10 years ago

              Trade it in for a Mack R-600 Coolpower , with improvised plow.. and articulated ballista emplacements on the trailers.. and spray-paint "EARTH" on one of the doors.. It's the only sensible solution..

    3. Sudden   10 years ago

      Thank you for this forum. It's a great place to read and hang out, especially on this side of the Crab Nebula.

      Agreed, but on the other side of the Crab Nebula lays Tattoine, and there are a few places there that are more exciting, intellectually advanced, outlandish, cringe-inducing, and foul-mouthed than here.

      1. Woodchipped Buscemi   10 years ago

        A wretched hive of scum and villainy.

  147. Bastiat's Woodchipper   10 years ago

    I've been contemplating the economics of the common woodchipper, a device of supposed singular utility. Consider, what economic benefits might occur if a woodchipper was used for other materials, perhaps to chip mammals? Would the effects reverberate through an economy, positively impacting other tradesman? After all, a woodchipper may need special cleaning and the competition to create specialized mammal-chippers may create jobs and improved chippers for all manner of chipping. As I have always said, if chippers do not cross borders, armies will. What if the mammals they chipped were parasasitcal, providing no utility of their own while taking from producers both capital and liberty?

    Consider the simple woodchipper.

    1. Migrant Log Chipper   10 years ago

      We used to have the world's best woodchipper near here at a pulp mill. This baby could chip a whole load of pulp logs, 50,000 lbs of wood at once. I saw it up close and personal. It was awesome.

      Could probably do the of whole of Preet's gang of thieves in 30 seconds....(disclaimer, I am not advocating that this happen, besides they tore they thing down a few years ago).

  148. Derpetologist   10 years ago

    I move that a wood chipper be featured in the Reason logo. Also, the tag line should be changed to "Free Minds, Free Markets, and Woodchippers". Also, I want a bowl of ice cream and nice hat. And the next Friday Funny should have something about woodchippers.

    PS I am NOT a crackpot!

  149. SIV   10 years ago

    Reason has shown they won't be hiding any commenters in the attic once the government-owned high speed rail starts running regular cattle car routes to the camps.

  150. Graphite   10 years ago

    Have we made it through this whole thread without making reference to the "physical shortcomings" Nick and Matt mentioned?

    #TeamWoodchipper

    1. Brochettaward   10 years ago

      Just one reference to Nick's unibrow and Robby's hair.

      1. Harvard   10 years ago

        Richmond's lack of a dick?

  151. lizbuddie   10 years ago

    How much wood would a woodchipper chip if a woodchipper could chuck wood?

    Thanks, Reason, for fighting this fight on all our 1A-loving behalf. And to Popehat for giving it ink. And anybody else who gets off their ass to write about it (which *should* include pretty much every political and cultural commentator).

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M_t13-0Joyc

    Dear DOJ - BITE MY ASS, YOU TYRANNICAL PRICKS.

    Sorry, just seems poetically wrong to keep this comment too clean and cordial.

    1. Chipper Gore (Suthenboy)   10 years ago

      Stick around more. You will very shortly stop apologizing for profanity. It is almost a requirement.

      1. lizbuddie   10 years ago

        Well, fanfuckingtastic, because I'm really fucking good at profanity.

        1. Migrant Log Chipper   10 years ago

          Yes, yes you are and hope you stick around, despite TIWTANFL.

  152. commodious spittoon   10 years ago

    Just to be clear, nothing has been resolved vis-a-vis any pending indictments, right?

  153. Chipper Gore (Suthenboy)   10 years ago

    Huh. I just heard Bill Mayer blame Fox News for the SC shooting and suggested that they be droned. He is suggesting terrorism on national television in exactly the same fashion as our own beloved six made suggestions about a certain forest.

    Looks like 'ol Preet is gonna be a busy boy.

    1. jester   10 years ago

      He can't see the forest for the trees?

  154. This Machine Loves Big Brother   10 years ago

    I know it's late in the thread, but has anyone asked for Preet & Co. to die in an Ass Factory fire, smothered to death under a pile of burning asses? Because that sounds about right.

    1. Chipper Gore (Suthenboy)   10 years ago

      There have been a few suggestions but that is the first I have heard that one.

      In all seriousness perhaps someone should contact the NY state BAR. The BAR's sole job is to defend the credibility of the legal profession. Have these fuckin' asshats done damage that needs to be addressed?

  155. JPyrate   10 years ago

    "The potential number of critical comments subject to the District Court's low bar for investigative compulsion is enormous. Now multiply that number by the number of controversial court cases, and you could quickly get to the point where federal courts were doing nothing but investigating online trolls"

    As a former troll, this is pretty much what trolling is about. If I were an Agorist this would be an effective, and acceptable method of fucking over the State.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B_3TlrZLpQ0

  156. Terc   10 years ago

    As a contribution to reaching 1000 comments I'd like to mention that I hope the folks who harassed Reason live long lives full of misery and bitterness. Also, they just guaranteed an increase in my donation.

    1. JPyrate   10 years ago

      ^^^ Here Here !!!

  157. AFSlade   10 years ago

    On-Topic: No one has bothered yet to name the douchebag magistrate who granted the government's confidentiality/gag order, so I will: FRANK MAAS.

    The, ahem, "honorable" Magistrate Judge FRANK "I never met a gag order I wouldn't fucking grant because I'm a fucking government hack" MAAS is the one who granted the gag order. Look at the papers submitted by those two douchebags from the US Atty's office. Seriously, all it is are the six comments in isolation with the boilerplate language on the order.

    That. is. fucking. it. That's all it took to get a judge to issue a prior restraint against a magazine, something the US Supreme Court has so loudly decried that it is considered black letter law that such a thing is presumptively unconstitutional. They teach it in first year of fucking law school, FFS, in Con Law I.

    1. AFSlade   10 years ago

      Let me say this loudly so everyone hears it: The judiciary has absolutely abandoned any pretense of being a separate, independent branch of government - particularly the one that is supposed to hold the wall against any usurpation of individual rights by the other two groups of idiots. THAT WAS WHAT THEY WERE FOUNDED/DESIGNED/INTENDED TO FUCKING DO.

      The "independent judiciary" idea has become completely unhinged from what its whole raison d'etre was - FRANK MAAS is a piece of totalitarian shit and he is unworthy of that office.

      Judge Maas - you screwed the pooch on this one and any other time you've granted these kinds of orders on nothing more than flimsy shit like this. You are a fucking disgrace. If you had a fucking shred of honor you would (a) publicly resign, (b) write a letter explaining your failure, telling everyone the system is broken, and (c) go on TV and the lecture circuit for an extended mea culpa and exhort all sitting judges to start doing their fucking Constitutional duty protecting the inalienable rights of the people of this country.

      Short of that, go fuck yourself.

      1. Chipper Gore (Suthenboy)   10 years ago

        "Short of that, go fuck yourself."

        With a woodchipper? It has to be with a woodchipper.

        1. AFSlade   10 years ago

          Suthenboy - Mais, bien sur! And if I wasn't such a luddite - and still too new to the pack - I would have changed my handle to the appropriate "woodchipping" designation.

          1. jester   10 years ago

            Thanks for the outing.

      2. JPyrate   10 years ago

        Thanx AF Slade. This is for FRANK MAAS.

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=je-M675ZTK4

        1. AFSlade   10 years ago

          Now that's some good shit.

          1. JPyrate   10 years ago

            =D

      3. AFSlade   10 years ago

        The two ass-clowns who asked for that, order, should also be the subject of public derision and scorn. Preet Bharara and Niketh Velamoor are both a disgrace to the legal profession. In a just world, your families will be embarrassed to share last names. I should hope that some day one of your children will read about this, understand the law, and tell all of their friends how ashamed they are to have you as a parent. Which they should be. Because you are both totalitarian fuckwads who get off on using the threat of violence over others. I know one thing: if I ever meet your kids, that's going to be my story... because it happens to be perfectly true.

        Every one-fucking-L learns that prior restraints are presumptively unconstitutional. Near v. Minnesota, 283 U.S. 697 (1931).

        1. jester   10 years ago

          It is sad about Bharara. I have no problem with him fucking with Wall Street, I have no problem with him fucking with the Bush firings, I have no problem with him fucking with Bank of America..he's not unintelligent by any means. His problem is his hubris. He's pathetic because he hasn't used his gifted intelligence in positive ways. How many times have we seen that. It'd been better that he'd become a junkie and wasted his life. He'd at least be a better judge had that happened.

    2. Paul.   10 years ago

      Thanks for this, Slade.

      1. Sevo   10 years ago

        Ditto.

        1. Woodchipped Buscemi   10 years ago

          +3

  158. Paul.   10 years ago

    how many other serious outlets allow anonymous commenters to run riot as we do? Some of the risk is legal, as in the current situation.

    Almost none, at least not a politics and culture news site. Youtube? Sure.

    But all the sniffy commentary by the Popehats and other blogs that have moderated comments were largely hypocritical in their criticism of Reason commentariat. The idea that their commenters are better is unadulterated bullshit. They're not, they're just getting deleted by a an intern, or roomful of interns.

    1. Brochettaward   10 years ago

      What self-respecting libertarian site would censor comments?

      Everyone mocks the romper room while creating sock puppets to post.

    2. jester   10 years ago

      It is ironic. It's the nannystate that need to protect us from harmful commentary. I only consider Reason because it follows through with its credo. Hell, I didn't even have a problem with Lone Wacko. That guy was unintentional entertainment.

  159. Sevo   10 years ago

    All-Seeing Woodchipper|6.19.15 @ 10:38PM|#
    "Unfortunately the object lesson is going to be that even what it's all out in the open, they have the ability to harass innocent citizens and suffer absolutely no consequences for it."

    Yes they do, and there is something we can do about it. Do not bail, continue to post even those things found obnoxious to the slavers.
    Tony Judt relates the story about the Yugoslav dissident; he could only advise you live your life *as if* you were free and accept the consequences.
    Whatever the Reason Six chose to do, I prefer to post here and make it clear that assholish prosecutors can lick Obo's butt.

    1. JPyrate   10 years ago

      ^ This is why I like you Sevo. =)

      1. Sevo   10 years ago

        Gracias, J, but no more than most of us do and claim.
        KEEP IT UP!

        1. JPyrate   10 years ago

          Wil do. =D

  160. Tionico   10 years ago

    reading the names of the "attorneys" involved makes me think there is some sort of cultural disconect.... or possibly some significant factor wherein these guys are making a lot of nothing, maneouvreing for some sort of recognition. "Ain't I wonderful, I got on the tail of three hudnred forty seven intrnet commenters who were conspiring to perpetrate evil against a federal judge.. ain't I sumpin?" Nothing like padding the time logs, eh?
    And that does not even approach the issue of throwing one's weight about, attempting to intimidate some corporate hooh hahs out there on the uncontrolled internet.

    1. Sevo   10 years ago

      Ah, wut?

      1. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

        I think he's showing some hate for Indians.

        1. Sevo   10 years ago

          I'll yield to your analysis; I can't make heads nor tails of that.

          1. Limpee Wiltstock   10 years ago

            Bharara (can you get more Indian?), Velamoor, Maas... How all these foreigners get in the country anyway?

    2. JPyrate   10 years ago

      Hi OTRTM !!! =D I have not seen you around for a while. =D

      1. kbolino   10 years ago

        Not enough "shit" or "ass" for Mandalay.

  161. Irish Says Enough Woodchippers   10 years ago

    "To live in a world where every stray, overheated Internet comment?however trollish and stupid it may be?can be interpreted as an actionable threat to be investigated by a federal grand jury is to live in a world where the government is telling the public and media to just shut up already. As we gather and publish more information on just how often this sort of thing happens, we pledge to always be on the side of more speech rather than less."

    I was talking to people on the blog of one of the users who happens to post here, and one of them seemed convinced Reason had coughed up the information on users without a fight.

    I disagreed and argued that though I often disagree with the editorial stance of reason, Nick Gillespie and Matt Welch definitely would not do that and were probably precluded from discussing the issue due to a gag order.

    I am glad to see I was right and will be donating money to Reason immediately because I am proud to help out any magazine who will fight for free speech in court.

    1. Paul.   10 years ago

      I was talking to people on the blog of one of the users who happens to post here, and one of them seemed convinced Reason had coughed up the information on users without a fight.

      Ran into that several times myself. Got to the point I felt like I was being a pollyana, believing that Reason might just need some time to explain.

      I'm pleased with what Reason and their legal team did here.

      1. Irish Says Enough Woodchippers   10 years ago

        Actually, Paul, looking at that thread, I don't think there was anyone legitimately making that argument. Crazy, mentally ill, desperately in need of medication Mary appears to have just shown up and started gibbering nonsensically.

        God, her husband needs to divorce her. It's the only way to save himself!

    2. Chipper Gore (Suthenboy)   10 years ago

      I doubled mine and added a monthly.

      The people foo-fooing those guys have no idea what it feels like to have an ADA set their sights on you. Fear. Even the bluster about 'you are close to obstructing a federal grand jury' is clearly a threat. Fear. It takes some balls not to cave (and good lawyers - thumbs up to Gayle) .

      Incidentally, if you do cave they just drag you in deeper.

      Matt and Nick did well.

      1. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

        Was that you on Popehat?

        I'm donating tonight.

        1. Sevo   10 years ago

          Playa, you reckon that's as good as Reason was gonna get?

          1. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

            Hmm, maybe that was you. There was a salt and pepper (mostly salt) gentleman who was interested in donating on Popehat.

            I will be doing the same.

    3. SIV   10 years ago

      I was talking to people on the blog of one of the users who happens to post here, and one of them seemed convinced Reason had coughed up the information on users without a fight.

      That is exactly what they did. Read the OP where Nick explains option #2 was not an option.
      Reason made no attempt to quash the subpoena. They had some flunky mouthpiece from their discount house counsel make a phone call, then they complied as ordered.

      I'm not holding it against them by any means. They could have thrown every cent and more at high-priced, top drawer counsel and almost certainly would have lost. I don't get why people think they fought this. I'm sure Reason did not want to comply, and feel sick about doing so (to some extent) but they didn't have much of a choice. Not if they wanted to keep their jobs and keep publishing the wonderful magazine and lame-o cosmotarian website with the best comments on teh web-o-net.

    4. Knarf Yenrab!   10 years ago

      Agree. I'm as critical of half measures as anyone, but if this isn't a case that can rally the DiLorenzos together with the Welches, I don't know what is.

    5. Limpee Wiltstock   10 years ago

      "I disagreed and argued that though I often disagree with the editorial stance of reason, Nick Gillespie and Matt Welch definitely would not do that and were probably precluded from discussing the issue due to a gag order."

      Yeah. They are way too much arsehools to just submit.

  162. Slammer   10 years ago

    Good job, Reason. I appreciate that you guys did and are doing the best you can in response to a really fucked up situation. Thanks to the lawyers, too. I cant express how much I've learned since joining the commentariat, so thanks to everyone here. This place has been a sane refuge from the day to day insanity going on in this country. Endless laughs around here, the BEST forum I've ever hung around in. Even the heavy legal and history and science shit thats way over my head has at least CHALLENGED me to read more and think more.
    And its very much appreciated. Keep up the good fight. Free expression is the fundamental basis for the self.

    That being said, IMO, there's a fucking RAT with a big mouth, there always is.

    1. JPyrate   10 years ago

      Slammer. Ask Aggy for an invite if you are a gamer.

      http://steamcommunity.com/grou.....Commenters

      1. Slammer   10 years ago

        I dont think my computer is good enough for that kind of gaming, but will check it out. I used to spend a LOT of time on xbox 360 live when I was in to it. Much appreciated, man.

        1. JPyrate   10 years ago

          No worries. I do not get to play as much as I used to. I's getting to the point where you can plug a controller into a usb port. You are welcome. =)

    2. Limpee Wiltstock   10 years ago

      There is such a thing as search engines, which can scan these motherfucking fora for specific terms. Plus, the comments in qu?sti?ne were de hecho in discussion of an article specificly relevant to the case. So, a retarded child with an Etch-a-Sketch and an internet conexion could've easily alerted anybody to the comments. A rat is unnecessary. Also, it seems clear to me that the process was started with the foregone conclusion that SOME harrassing action needed doing, and they then just looked around to try to find an excuse. Like a time my brother got pulled over, told, "you're going to jail, buddy!", arrested, took to jail, where the peace officer then called the prosecutor and, in my brother's presence, arsked, "What do I charge him with?" The attack was predetermined. The charges were an after the fact rationalisation. Some crap here, Bozo. Gosh! Can you be more stupid?

  163. Brochettaward   10 years ago

    If I weren't so lazy, I would set up a website as a permanent memorial to the douchebagary of the AUSA's involved here, and the judge(s) in question. It would feature random pictures of woodchippers, contact information for where ever they work, their districts, ambient woodchipping sounds, and random GIF's like back in the old days of the internet before females started using computers.

  164. This Machine Loves Big Brother   10 years ago

    Well, I'm glad I got drunk and logged on and read all the comments. Very heartening. You guys can expect a bump in the donation for this year's beg-a-thon.

    Thanks, reason. Fight the good fight. Y'all are alright by me, and that's saying something, because I'm an asshole who generally hates people.

  165. Galactic Chipper Cdr Lytton   10 years ago

    I'm a little late to the thread but my thanks to Matt & Nick for explaining what happened, and thanks generally for reason allowing the commentariat to flourish. reason's fund drive is getting my money (again).

    Fuck Brahara and his toady Velamoor. Those two bit government thugs were the sort that the Founders tossed on their ear. The sort that can't even follow the literal words that they wrote but goddamn help anyone who doesn't comply with whatever fantasy intent is floating through their heads.

    Finally, my appreciation to the reason 6. I've written similar comments, especially after yet another infuriating nut punch. When we have the reason meetup in the camps, I'll buy a round of dirty water for you guys.

  166. mrvco   10 years ago

    Thanks for fighting the good fight Reason. Sadly all this crap proves is that Bin Laden won.

  167. CBear   10 years ago

    I have a different objection to this subpoena. It's coming from US Attorneys for the Southern District of New York. It's coming from the same division of the DOJ that prosecuted the Silk Road case before Judge Forrest, and presumably on her behalf.

    Who alerted the DOJ to the comments section of the obscure Reason.com?

    Who made a complaint about these comments?

    Judges are exhorted to avoid even the appearance of partiality and impropriety.

    But what this appears to be is partiality and impropriety between the Judge and Prosecution in the Silk Road case.

    The Prosecution and the Judge appear now to be so buddy-buddy that they'd conspire to engage in a meritless prosecution of internet banter critical of them to undermine a law that is superior to all other laws. Some dude enabled the sale of drugs, etc., but you conspire to silence free speech.

    Dear DOJ for the Southern District of New York and the Honorable Katherine Forrest,
    Go ahead and subpoena my identity. I guess I'll just have to 'man up' and say it to your faces: Y'ALL LOOK CORRUPT. DO AS I SAY AND NOT AS I DO DOES NOT GARNER RESPECT.

    1. Warrren   10 years ago

      Who you callin' 'obscure'?

    2. Sevo   10 years ago

      "Judges are exhorted to avoid even the appearance of partiality and impropriety."

      And there are those who presume judges are some sort of 'special' people, when in fact they are self-serving individuals just like every one else.
      Except they LIE.

  168. Woodchipped Buscemi   10 years ago

    I suggest that Brahara, Velamoor, Judge Maas and Judge Forrest, be rounded up, and dropped by helicopter into ISIS controlled territory. They should be issued only a slab of bacon, and a pistol with four rounds, for their self defense.

    Rot in hell, the lot.

    1. AFSlade   10 years ago

      What's ironic about this as that all of them, so quick to use the threat of the King's Violence on others, and not a fucking one of them knows what violence really looks like. I find something about that reprehensible. It's why I loved this scene in GOT because he's goddamn well right.

      "the man who passes the sentence should swing the sword"
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=90oMLWDJ-C4

      You divorce yourself from what using the King's Justice really means and it becomes so easy to "do unto [unseen] others." I think every judge who issues a no-knock warrant should have to gear up and go and see what happens - the good and the fucking bad: go kick in some poor slob's door in the middle of the night; get the wrong house once or twice; find out the intel was bullshit and these are low-level nobodies; flashbang some sleeping babies.

      That's what should happen. Watch how quickly bullshit warrants dry up and cowards like these go pissing back where they fucking belong.

    2. ScottyBoman   10 years ago

      I hope you are suggesting that they be dropped from a very low altitude (say 5 ft), so you can't be accused of inciting people to harm them. You should also implore the IS fighters to go easy on them, as a CYA.

      1. Chumby   10 years ago

        And it goes without saying that they not be dropped over an operating woodchipper.

  169. Agammamon   10 years ago

    Wow, 972 comments (928 with this) and still 2 hours to midnight in the only time-zone that matters.

    Not that I would post some pointless junk solely to increment the counter.

    1. Gozer the Gozerian   10 years ago

      Apologize!

      (I kid, I kid.)

    2. Warrren   10 years ago

      Pointless junk.

    3. Sevo   10 years ago

      A, it ain't like we got the click-bait of White Indian anymore (thank Zeus), but this 'un is gonna go a while.

    4. Pathogen   10 years ago

      Well.. Rufus derailed the whole thread a while back.. Soooo.. How do you feel about turtles?

      1. BuSab Agent   10 years ago

        I like them. I also know how to tell boy turtles from girl turtles....all part of my duties as the Fount of Evil Esoteric Knowledge and Tooth Fairy (Mid Western Region).

        1. Pathogen   10 years ago

          The chick has longer claws..

        2. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

          Your turtle climbed Mount Everest, if I remember correctly.

          1. BuSab Agent   10 years ago

            I wish, no only to the top of her cage. She then base jumped without a parachute. Did you know vets repair broken turtle shells with Bondo?

            1. Sevo   10 years ago

              "Did you know vets repair broken turtle shells with Bondo?"

              Strangely enough, I do.
              A co-worker had a desert tortoise as a pet when they were still legal, and it 'required' repair to the lower shell (for reasons I never asked about). Damn thing smelled like a replica Cobra for months.

      2. Agammamon   10 years ago

        I have persistently called for a reopening of the treaties while providing Americans with a chance to reshape the US' relations with turtles.

        I understand that Americans are not happy with the status quo and believe that the US needs to change in order to better address their concerns.

        I reiterate here that I want to find a fair deal for the US.

        God Bless.

        1. BuSab Agent   10 years ago

          *golf clap for the Obama impersonation...unless it wasn't and you have discovered AC's secret stash...in which case kudos for finding Cyborg's Plutonium Nyborg after he moved it from the Transmitter Compartment.

          1. Agammamon   10 years ago

            Actually, David Cameron impersonation. A good chunk of that is simply his statements regarding the UK's EU referendum cut and redone to fit the US.

            1. BuSab Agent   10 years ago

              That's a nice word salad he gots. It goes any where and means nothing.

        2. Pathogen   10 years ago

          Well.. The Turtle Prioritization Act is an unbridled power grab. It smacks of potential impropriety, and it's certainly a raw deal for our struggling private sector unions. I'm not comfortable with giving them "fast-track" authority over any legislation pending in their favor.. It just seems like a step backward for our national interests..

          1. BuSab Agent   10 years ago

            Marriage between turtles must be a boy and girl, if a boy turtle marries another boy turtle, then God will punish Mr Lizard.

      3. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

        Turtles can suck my balls.

        1. jester   10 years ago

          I have a turtle head poking out.

  170. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

    Hello Streisand Effect. Nice to meet you.

    1. jester   10 years ago

      Can it be that it was so simple then?

  171. ScottyBoman   10 years ago

    The obvious way to have an anonymous forum is to configure your code so that it does not store IP addresses. As Nick and Matt correctly mention, it is still possible to create email addresses without giving identifying information (Though demand for phone numbers seems to be on the rise). But then there is still the fact that email accounts might be storing the IP addresses where it was created.

    So why not give people the option of creating user names and passwords without the email addresses? Such users would have to complete a Captcha every time they posted (not just for every login). It seems like this would block all spam-bots, and slow down manual spamming efforts. Persistant manual spamers could just have their accounts deleted so they would need to create a new account just to resume spamming.

    As far as trolls go, I hardly see that most of the comments (911 including my own at the moment ) are any better than so-called trolls. Most of the time people call another user a "troll," they just disagree with the person and are frustrated with their inability to change the persons mind.

    Note: I use my real name, so come and get me!

    1. Irish Says Enough Woodchippers   10 years ago

      "So why not give people the option of creating user names and passwords without the email addresses? Such users would have to complete a Captcha every time they posted (not just for every login). It seems like this would block all spam-bots, and slow down manual spamming efforts. Persistant manual spamers could just have their accounts deleted so they would need to create a new account just to resume spamming."

      We have a crazy person who used to comment here and would literally go nuts for days on end spamming every comment thread. Reason has registration to stop the nutcase from engaging in nuttery and unfortunately I don't know what they could do to deal with the problem without having potentially IP storing registration rules.

      1. ScottyBoman   10 years ago

        The fact that you know it was the same "crazy person," shows that he (or she) was able to keep the same account. I address that. being faced with a Capcha each time would slow him (or her) down too.

        1. Irish Says Enough Woodchippers   10 years ago

          You're wrong, this particular person actually consistently switched commenting names specifically so people wouldn't know it was her at first. People would then notice it was her and she'd change accounts again.

          She absolutely would have gone through a thousand capcha's if it meant derailing conversations, because she was completely nuts. I know you're not a regular commenter here, but this woman actually has websites devoted to her obsession with this comment section which she updates frequently.

          We're talking about the kind of nut who might kill a bunch of people and then shoot herself at some point in the near future. Capcha's will not slow her down.

          1. Francisco d'Anconia   10 years ago

            Someone with better search skills than me, sow Scotty a White Indian thread.

            1. Francisco d'Anconia   10 years ago

              *show

            2. Judge Forrest's Clitdong   10 years ago

              White Indian was a national treasure.

              1. Sevo   10 years ago

                In which nation?

              2. Limpee Wiltstock   10 years ago

                I actually plagiarised a bunch of his commentary in my sociology courses, and received excellent marks and comments from the professor about my keen understanding of things.

              3. jester   10 years ago

                not so much.

          2. Irish Says Enough Woodchippers   10 years ago

            Also, Jesus Christ, I just read your website:

            "I am, Professor Scotty Boman. I teach mathematics and physics at Wayne County Community College District in Detroit, MI. At the time of the attack, I was a candidate for Detroit City Clerk. Since there was an on-site absentee voting place on campus, I decided to stop by there after teaching class. I took pictures of signs that were posted by the incumbent City Clerk; I thought they violated campaign rules that other candidates had to follow. Apparently, a campus police officer didn't like this, so she started harassing me and called on a few other officers to join her. So I walked over to where volunteers for other candidates were handing out literature.

            As soon as I attempted to hand out some of my campaign literature the same officer tried to stop me by swatting my hand. When I complained, I was jumped by other officers who took me away in cuffs. Knowing I was scheduled to speak at a candidate forum, they held me prisoner until the forum was almost over. During my captivity, they cuffed me in a torturous position that caused long-term damage to my wrist. They decided to charge me with trespassing even though I was in a public area at my place of work."

            🙁 I'm going to donate to your defense later today. The state is out of control.

            1. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

              Glad he reached his goal though.

    2. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

      Beam me up!

      1. ScottyBoman   10 years ago

        I can't violate the laws of physics Playa. I have no power.

    3. Harvard   10 years ago

      Scotty, we miss you.

      Detroit Red Wings

  172. Hans von Woodchipperberge   10 years ago

    You know who else is a fucking idiot?

    1. Pathogen   10 years ago

      Navin Johnson?

    2. BuSab Agent   10 years ago

      Hitler?

    3. Francisco d'Anconia   10 years ago

      Hihn?

      1. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

        Win. And it's topical

      2. Chumby   10 years ago

        Bully! 91% of the commentors on here are bullies

        1. Pathogen   10 years ago

          8% are assholes..

    4. SIV   10 years ago

      MNG?

      1. jester   10 years ago

        Forgot about MNG. Thanks for the memories.

  173. Laird   10 years ago

    Your mistake was telling the assistant US attorney that you were going to notify the subpoena subjects. You should have just done it. Having a discussion about narrowing the subpoena was fine, but the call should have ended there.

  174. Laird   10 years ago

    Your mistake was telling the assistant US attorney that you were going to notify the subpoena subjects. You should have just done it. Having a discussion about narrowing the subpoena was fine, but the call should have ended there.

  175. Laird   10 years ago

    Your mistake was telling the assistant US attorney that you were going to notify the subpoena subjects. You should have just done it. Having a discussion about narrowing the subpoena was fine, but the call should have ended there.

  176. Laird   10 years ago

    Your mistake was telling the assistant US attorney that you were going to notify the subpoena subjects. You should have just done it. Having a discussion about narrowing the subpoena was fine, but the call should have ended there.

    1. Pathogen   10 years ago

      Sooo.. What you are saying, is that.. the mistake was telling the assistant US attorney that they were going to notify the subpoena subjects... and, they should have just done it?

      1. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

        No, I think he was saying they didn't need to notify the subjects and should have just done it.

    2. BuSab Agent   10 years ago

      Behold the Quadruple Squirrel post as Foretold by the Prophecy!

      1. Chumby   10 years ago

        An army of woodchippers followed. And behind them, death.

      2. jester   10 years ago

        There are simple devices to keep squirrels from capitalizing on bird feeders. They keep squirrel populations down and fewer squirrels means less squirrel infiltration into the webz.

  177. XM   10 years ago

    I would encourage Reason to at least consider using Disqus (or something like it) for the comment section, which is becoming standard in commenting sections online. It'll allow the commenter / community to down vote or edit comments. It's not necessarily a solution, but it might help.

    I know many people will consider that as capitulating to the federal government, but Reason is a private company and they can set their own TOS for the comment section. Now that they've been targeted, I wouldn't blame them for taking measures to protect their writers and the commenters.

    Who tipped off the feds about 6 random comments? I wouldn't be surprised if some left leaning organization has labeled this site as some dangerous "right wing" patriot group and is monitoring the comment section. Reason is brash and PROLIFIC in its coverage on gun rights, free speech (hate speech!), ACA, and false campus rapes. More so than the National Review and some other prominent conservative sites.

    This is a dangerous time for free speech, and Hillary Clinton is the front runner on the Dem side. I wish you well.

    1. BuSab Agent   10 years ago

      NONONONONONONONONONO Disqus sucks great horny toad testicles.

      1. Migrant Log Chipper   10 years ago

        No shit, Bu, Disqus is "Trix are for kids" moronic.

      2. MoriahJovan   10 years ago

        + elebenty-billion

    2. Agammamon   10 years ago

      I will [redacted] you if that comes to pass.

      1. Agammamon   10 years ago

        OTOH, updating the current commenting software to allow up/downvoting along with notifying you of replies to your post and implementing the ability to search for your previous posts in a thread (rather than having to skim through, hoping to catch your username) would be great.

        Reason should have a Kickstarter for that.

        1. BuSab Agent   10 years ago

          CTRL F your username, dude.

          1. Warrren   10 years ago

            Yeah, F your user name!

        2. Francisco d'Anconia   10 years ago

          Reasonable

          1. Rhywun   10 years ago

            Yup, reasonable already does most of that.

  178. AFSlade   10 years ago

    "....of the One with the Name of a Legend of the Waves..."[!!!]

    What has been foretold has come to be!!

    (Okay, that's all I've got. I'm going to bed.)

  179. Warrren   10 years ago

    1000th Post!

    1. Agammamon   10 years ago

      5 short.

  180. BuSab Agent   10 years ago

    And we're done!

    1. BuSab Agent   10 years ago

      Well not quite done yet....Anonbot and " my brother's cousin's best friend made $69,000 a week for just a few hours online" haven't posted yet.

      1. Agammamon   10 years ago

        They're like cockroaches - they don't come out to post until the rest of us leave.

    2. Knarf Yenrab!   10 years ago

      We're not done until Postrel makes a handle to forgive us for saying naughty and undignified things on occasion.

      Maybe I can invoke her by referencing the genius of Kirkpatrick Sale and Wendell Berry. Or by writing her full name ("Virginia Postrel") so she finds this post in her daily autoGoogle.

      1. Bobarian (Would Chip Her)   10 years ago

        You have to say her name 3 times in the mirror.

        1. jester   10 years ago

          Bloody Ginny, Bloody Ginny, Bloody Ginny.

  181. Pathogen   10 years ago

    Page 2 snypa!..

  182. Knarf Yenrab!   10 years ago

    I hope to see Welch's boyish visage and questionable sartorial stylings on television every night for the next month. The USA office delivered Reason and libertarianism a giant present without even realizing it. I bet Rand and Ron would love to say something about this as well.

    And from the accounts here and on Ken's blog, the AUSA in question seems to be the sort of character who turns minarchists into anarchists. When you see the brute force of the state at the hands of vicious, driven student-council washouts, you begin to understand why this power can't exist in a world that aspires to be just.

    1. jester   10 years ago

      In a perfect world, this would be true.

  183. crufus   10 years ago

    The Wikipedia page for Preet Bharara has been modified by user Woodenchipper to add a section for the Reason subpoena. I expect it will be removed by his lackeys as soon as they are aware. Get ready for a Wiki fight!

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Preet_Bharara

    1. Djucational Woodchipper   10 years ago

      Thing is, though, is that there's already stuff on there critical of him, such as that he is "targeting people of Indian origin."

      1. jester   10 years ago

        And we all shine on. Like the moon and the stars up above.

  184. Hans von Woodchipperberge   10 years ago

    How many Reasoners use TOR?

    1. jester   10 years ago

      I have nothing to hide. What's the big deal about Snowden anyway?

  185. american socialist   10 years ago

    So, in summary, you received a subpoena in response to someone making death threats in the comments section and you complied. Has the internet blown up yet in response because, while I'm probably with you on the particulars, this doesn't seem like that big of a deal or a trampling of the 1st amendment. Maybe at worst these six commenters will get a visit one afternoon from the cops where it will probably be found that they are morons. Or maybe not... We've just had 8 people killed by some maniac inspired by the type of extremist rhetoric that sometimes shows up here.

    Whatever the case, I'm sure that nick gillespie is up to the job of playing martyr for the entire internet. It's a job that his personality and temperament are suited--I say, uniquely so-- for.

    1. Woodchipped Buscemi   10 years ago

      AmSoc - you would really equate commentary here with an unhinged actual murderer?

      Fuck Off, You slaver fellating mendacious cunt.

      1. american socialist   10 years ago

        No... Is that what I did in my comment? I certainly doubt this case will get as far as a visit by the cops even if part of me would like to see these asshats defend their comments to a magistrate.

        This case is clearly overreach in response to commenters who are morons. Do you think we can move on by the end of the decade from this or will we need some more time than that?

        1. Agammamon   10 years ago

          Why would I need to defend my comment to a magistrate?

          This case is clearly overreach . . . .

          Yeah, *that's* the story. You're OK with that overreach as long as its against people you find distasteful?

        2. Pathogen   10 years ago

          "..in response to commenters who are morons.."

          Would you like some crayons?

          1. Juvenile Bluster   10 years ago

            I'm not sure AmSoc should be allowed crayons. Last time he had them he pushed one into his brain, which explains a lot.

        3. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

          The only moron I see here is a person with the handle 'American socialist'.

        4. Sevo   10 years ago

          american socialist|6.20.15 @ 2:50AM|#
          "[...]I certainly doubt this [...]"

          Shitbag, it's always a pleasure to see you show up and prove once again how stupid the left is.

        5. jester   10 years ago

          Yes. That is exactly what you did through Sophistry.

    2. Migrant Log Chipper   10 years ago

      We already know you suck statist cock, commie kid, no need to convince us...we already know. So your post is redundant.

      Fuck off, stalin fellator.

    3. Pathogen   10 years ago

      "So, in summary, you received a subpoena in response to someone making death threats in the comments section"

      What?

      " this doesn't seem like that big of a deal or a trampling of the 1st amendment."

      To someone of limited mental capacity.

      "Maybe at worst these six commenters will get a visit one afternoon from the cops where it will probably be found that they are morons."

      Sure.. a visit from the police is always welcome. I'm just bet you would stave them off with your keen intellect, and rapier wit..

      "We've just had 8 people killed by some maniac inspired by the type of extremist rhetoric that sometimes shows up here."

      Awesome, the way you connected two unrelated issues with the mundane rhetoric of worn out talking points. Trot them out like Sundays best...

      "Whatever the case, I'm sure that nick gillespie is up to the job of playing martyr for the entire internet. It's a job that his personality and temperament are suited--I say, uniquely so-- for."

      I like you.. your funny.

      1. jester   10 years ago

        "We've just had 8 people killed...": non-sequitur to the rescue!

    4. crufus   10 years ago

      There were no death threats, just comments that basically said we would all be better off if the judge was dead and burning in hell.

      There is no evidence that the church killer was inspired by "extremist rhetoric", except in your mind.

      Suppression of discussion of the subpoena is a prior restraint that qualifies as "trampling of the 1st amendment".

    5. Agammamon   10 years ago

      We've just had 8 people killed by some maniac inspired by the type of extremist rhetoric that sometimes shows up here.

      You know how many federal judges have been murdered in the last 35 years?

      Four.

      And one, wasn't assassinated, he was simply in the wrong place at the wrong time (John Roll, Arizona, 2011).

      And the sort of extremist rhetoric that shows up here?

      1. That rhetoric comes from basically *one* guy. And he gets called out on it immediately. And its nothing compared to the rhetoric on actual supremist sites (of any ethnicity, white, black , etc).

      2. You yourself, advocate an ideology that has been responsible for most of the human death and misery of the last half century.

      1. Pathogen   10 years ago

        You waste valuable electrons responding to a mental deficient..

      2. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

        Know what's 'extremist rhetoric' to me?

        Anything that comes out of the mouth of a progressive and SJW across the continent.

        The only people calling for the death, imprisonment, censorship, removal and ultimate destruction of those they disagree with are PROGRESSIVES (and bureaucrats like the bunch who tried to bully Reason and six lousy commenters).

    6. juris imprudent   10 years ago

      Jeez, Hihn then AmSoc - is the the legendary ur-thread of trolldom?

    7. juris imprudent   10 years ago

      Jeez, Hihn then AmSoc - is the the legendary ur-thread of trolldom?

      1. PapayaSF   10 years ago

        No Buttplug and no Tony, so, no.

    8. Chumby   10 years ago

      Amsoc

      "We've just had eight people killed..."

      You and others were behind/ordered the killing of eight people? Sounds like you need the visit from the authorities.

  186. Intelligent Mr Toad   10 years ago

    Actually, in FARGO, Steve Buscemi's character gets put into the woodchipper HEAD first, not feet first.

    1. Woodchipped Buscemi   10 years ago

      To be fair, no one is sure what part of me went in first. Just that one of my feet was last.

      I make nice deco on snow.

  187. Intelligent Mr Toad   10 years ago

    It is important to note that in evaluating online threats, the government does not distinguish between threats, predictions, and warnings. Posting that you think someone is in danger of being harmed by an unknown or unidentified third party is considered just as much a threat as posting that you yourself intend to harm someone. I know this from personal experience.

    1. Migrant Log Chipper   10 years ago

      Proving that Toads, particularly you, aren't very intelligent. Fuck off...

  188. JParker   10 years ago

    In reading the subpoena and gag order, I note that the phone numbers of both Maxine Vales, Deputy US Marshall, and Niketh V. Velamoor, Assistant United States Attorney, were redacted in the published version. Given their lack of respect for privacy, I ask Nick Gillespie, Matt Welch, and/or anyone else at Reason responsible for this decision, "Why?"

    1. Chipper Gore (Suthenboy)   10 years ago

      Because including that information might make it easy for some nutcase to actually threaten them? They are being considerate? Because including that information does not add any value to the story? The article makes its point very well without that information.

      1. JParker   10 years ago

        Some nutcase could easily threaten them using the other contact information provided, such as email addresses that were listed.

        One wonders why they would (or should) be considerate to these thugs.

        Value would be added to the story by making it easier for readers to contact these people and petition them for a redress of their grievances over this activity directly, and without making it easy for that expression to be ignored (e.g., by having a lower-level employee simply delete the email after reading one or two lines).

  189. CBear   10 years ago

    TO THE TRANSCRIPT!

    "It's judges like these who should be taken out back and [slang to thank someone for something they have done - often used by South African youths]."

    "It's judges like these who will be taken out back and [The slang to thank someone for something they have done - used by South African youths]. FTFY."

    "Why waste [slang for weed]? [Slang for toothy fellatio] gets the message across clearly enough. Especially if you feed them in [identifying phrase for foot fetishists]."

    "Why do it out back? [slang to thank someone for something they have done - often used by South African youths] her out front, on the steps of the courthouse."

    "I hope there is a special place in Hell, [California, 92239] reserved for that horrible woman."

    "There is."

    "I'd prefer a Hell-ish place on [slang for mostly harmless] be reserved for her as well."

    "Fuck that. I don't want to pay for that [Brit slang for everything, most comparable to the American slang term, "fuck"] food, housing and medical. Send her through the [slang for receiving toothy fellatio]"

    So, where's the threat? If Preet retorts one needs CONTEXT to know that these commenters were not discussing whether and how best to thank the Judge (in pretty well-worn slang, that only might be lost on a Baby Boomer) then why doesn't he pay attention TO THE CONTEXT, and quit with the assault?

    1. Chipper Gore (Suthenboy)   10 years ago

      Why? Because they have no intention of securing a conviction and know they can't get one if they tried. This is a 'cant beat the ride' attempt to frighten people into not criticizing government officials. Classic petty tyranny. These are the kinds of people referred to in this line - "He has erected a multitude of New Offices, and sent hither swarms of Officers to harrass our people, and eat out their substance."

      1. jester   10 years ago

        Agreed. It'll give them a chance to go on a fishing expedition through the Reason 6's archives and they might come up with some petty offenses that might be aggrandized into more. I think they are hoping that the rest of us will hear about it and get scared, because if we had nothing to hide we would never be scared.Fuck. I thought this shit was settled back in John Wilkes era.

  190. Je suis Woodchipper   10 years ago

    The AUSA's attempt to kiss Judge Forrest's ass may have sounded good at first but they royally fucked up big time by not securing the gag order concurrently with the subpoena for personal information. Now Niketh Velamoor, his boss Preet Bharara, and judge Katherine Forrest are all very publicly associated with ham-fisted state intimidation antithetical to the First Amendment and settled case law. Well done.

    1. Chipper Gore (Suthenboy)   10 years ago

      Love the handle.

      Yes, that was the first thing that struck me upon reading the article. Ham-fisted to say the least. I admit it gave me pleasure to know that Velamoor stepped on his own dick so badly. These fuckheads aren't that sharp so they get govt goon jobs where they can substitute bullying for legal acumen. That is how they get by. I am sure 99% of the time intimidation works for them.

      1. jester   10 years ago

        Case closed. That's how Mama Cass died.

  191. OzarkAggie   10 years ago

    It was in Iraq that Saddam would send his most hated enemies through a woodchipper feet first. If he just really disliked you it was head first.

    In Fargo the woodchipper was used on a corpse, and it was so small the body had to be dismembered.

    Get your references straight.

    1. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

      You seem to be well-versed about how woodchippers have been used for objects other than wood. Please do go on.

    2. PapayaSF   10 years ago

      Saddam supposedly used a plastic shredder, but it was never verified.

      1. jester   10 years ago

        I always heard it was a slow painful death carried out with a dull cheese grater.

  192. D. M. Michell   10 years ago

    First: The Silk Road conviction and sentence proves that "the law" does not equal "justice."

    Second: Welcome to the nearly complete police state that America is becoming. Expect more of the same in the future. North Korea is like this.

    Third: The so-called war on drugs was started by religious groups lobbying Congress to get their version of religion put into secular law. (The Harrison Narcotics Act of 1914: These drugs are immoral therefore they should be illegal.) That is Sharia Law American style and completely abrogates the fundamental concept of inalienable rights in which people can do what they want as long as they do not violate the rights of other in so doing. We do not have rights anymore, we have privileges granted to us by the government.

    dowehaverights.blogspot.com

  193. Lyrad   10 years ago

    I registered just to post this:

    Assistant United States Attorneys like Velamoor should be taken out back and shot, but only if no wood-chippers are available.

    If Big Government wants to monitor and try to limit or control our speech, we should swamp them with more unacceptable comments than they can prosecute.

    I am Spartacus!

    1. jester   10 years ago

      You underestimate the powers of prosecution in a country at war. With whom, you ask? Everybody!

  194. JusWit778   10 years ago

    There is a guy that knows how to roll with it. Wow.

    http://www.Goin-Anon.tk

  195. gord53   10 years ago

    Messrs Gillespie and Welch,

    Many thanks for this honest, informative post. There can be no doubt that the biggest threat to our liberty comes not from terrorists or other foreign entities, but rather from our own government. We are all in your debt.

  196. Lyrad   10 years ago

    Is there a waiting period or background checks on the purchase of wood-chippers?

    1. jester   10 years ago

      Word to woodchipper murderers: someone finally posted that woodchippers are handy tools for disposing of bodies already murdered, but less effective as initial dispatchers. The Coen Bros. of course taught the world this. Furthermore, there is never any need to murder anyone. They are always due a court trial before a fair and impartial judge. I would even wish this for an unfair and impartial judge who was convicted of crimes against humanity. That's the essence of humanity.

  197. vimrich   10 years ago

    Leci n'est pas une threat.

  198. Despiser   10 years ago

    So much of left-wing thought is a kind of playing with fire by people who don't even know that fire is hot.

    When peaceful recourse is denied, violent redress becomes justified, it becomes manifold.

  199. hamilton   10 years ago

    a THOUSAND comments? Holy fuck that's what I get for having a life on Friday night.

    Anyway, thanks Matt and Nick. And thanks for sticking by the commentariat even though we're kinda assholes. You should make a guest apearance at the NE meetup next month and get free alcohol. I promise not to kick Nick in the balls because of his Brady joke.

    1. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

      Dude, everyone knows you were knitting a sweater last night.

      1. hamilton   10 years ago

        It's TATTING you cretin.

        1. jester   10 years ago

          That's lacing.

        2. BuSab Agent   10 years ago

          A tatted sweater would be terribly stiff and uncomfortable...unless you're into that sort of thing, NTTAWWT.

      2. Chumby   10 years ago

        Would it be in poor taste to Bedazzle a 1980s Bryan Adams-esque jeans jacket with Fuck Off Slaver and send it to Preet?

  200. alamirfathy   10 years ago

    Last weekend, the long-awaited mid-century modern credenza my husband and I had purchased arrived at our home. But it wasn't carried in by two heavy lifters in white gloves. Rather, a 60-some year old woman stood at the door and pointed us to the 35-foot moving truck that contained the seven-foot-long, solid teak beauty. "I have a bad shoulder", she explained as she led us toward the truck. Uh oh.???? ????? ???? ???????

  201. Page Turner   10 years ago

    They came for the trolls and I did not speak out because I was not a troll. Then they came for the woodchippers and I did not speak out because I did not chip wood. Then they came for me and there was no one left to speak for me.

    1. Theschnack   10 years ago

      Love it. Cheers

  202. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

    Just scroll past the bold, people.

    1. Sevo   10 years ago

      You know, Mike and his enormous ego are only here to help, right?
      I mean, he's only trying to explain how he knows exactly what should be done and how none of us here have any idea about his 50 YEARS OF MAKING THE LIBERTARIAN PARTY THE MOST WONDERFUL THING THAT EVER HAPPENED TO MANKIND AND HE'S THE SAVIOR OF........
      Wait a minute, where was I?

    2. bacon-magic   10 years ago

      +1000

  203. Flemur   10 years ago

    Preet Bharara

    That's what parakeets say. What's the guy's real name?

  204. Flemur   10 years ago

    Niketh Velamoor

    Is that a floor wax, a new toothpaste or both?

    1. PapayaSF   10 years ago

      I think it's a running shoe for Islamic bicyclists.

    2. crab_apple   10 years ago

      Dessert topping.

  205. MSimon   10 years ago

    Please use the comments to demonstrate your own ignorance, unfamiliarity with empirical data and lack of respect for scientific knowledge. Be sure to create straw men and argue against things I have neither said nor implied. If you could repeat previously discredited memes or steer the conversation into irrelevant, off topic discussions, it would be appreciated. Lastly, kindly forgo all civility in your discourse . . . you are, after all, anonymous. - Barry Ritholtz

    http://www.ritholtz.com/blog/2.....grid-work/

  206. Mattnad   10 years ago

    So we have criminal investigations for comments protected by the constitution but none for torturing detainees. Thought crimes are bad, real crimes are OK. Lesson over.

    1. voluntaryist   10 years ago

      The government's end game: Govt. permits itself everything, the ruled nothing.

  207. Theschnack   10 years ago

    They can take our woodchippers when they pry them from our dead, cold hands

  208. Theschnack   10 years ago

    Lemonade stand little'uns and anarcho-woodchippers unite!

  209. voluntaryist   10 years ago

    My comments don't get personal, as in personal threats, but they are blunt, honest in an extreme way, that many statists/collectivists would be offended, even perhaps embarrassed. I don't hold back. I take fundamental issues seriously. I do this in person also, face to face. I always have. I have been told, "You can't say that" or "You shouldn't say that". When I ask, "Why not, it's the truth.?", I get, "Yes, but people are not so confrontational."

    I have gotten responses like: "Arn't you worried you might be visited by the govt.?" Even my wife has expressed concern and wondered if I might be putting myself in danger. My reply: "The day I can no longer speak/write my thoughts without threats from govt. is the day I leave. That is my 'line in the sand'". That is why I don't hide under "anonymous" or in any other way.

    I don't believe "nefarious" trumps free speech or that the govt. really is worried by such remarks. Don't believe them. Govt. is in the business of expanding its power. Suppressing speech does that. Of course, they are not going to come right out and admit it, hence the lame lies.

  210. shipley130   10 years ago

    Reason,
    How dare you use common sense arguing with the federal government. You darned, dirty common sensers. The only people that can get away with playin' both sides is the federal government. They will not stand for civilian sites that cater to drug users. The federal government are the only people authorized to arrest people involved with drugs AND be the people that authorize the handout of clean needles used to inject those illegal drugs. Tsk, tsk, Reason.

  211. block30   10 years ago

    We need actions steps.
    1. Support Reason and the Constitution in whatever ways we can. 2 .Decide our recourse against Bharara and Velamoor. Can we start the process to get them removed/disbarred/sued/publicly shamed? Flagrantly shunning the constitution and this attempted cloak-and-dagger move has consequences! They want to work in the shadows and hush people? Make a very public example out of them! Another lesson for the history books, our current populace, and our kids. Big government is not our friend.

    1. gabeh73   10 years ago

      Will someone do a interview with Valdemoor and Barrararaa?

      talk to them like humans? or will they hide?

  212. Warrren   10 years ago

    1000th Post!

  213. Gary T   10 years ago

    This is just one the most obvious round one of the establishment political powers beginning to crack down on the libertarian movement.
    We are step three of the "ignore you, laugh at you, fight you" timeline. They will only step up their attacks, not on MOM fringe survivalists and tea party types, but rather on the extremely rational and reasonable libertarians, because that is where the true threat to their hegemony of power exists.
    Unlike the fringe emotionally driven politically fuzzy-minded outliers and extremists, the libertarian movement is eminently rational and axiomatically logic based in its political stances and conclusions.
    That serves as a deeper threat, because as more and more people recognize what libertarianism is really all about, it will become more influential both in higher intellectual realms and in man-in-the-street opinions and voting.

    I wrote about this potential concerted attack on libertarians back when it was laughable that the powers-that-be would even expend the effort to whisk away the gnat that they viewed libertarians to be. Now that has changed, and we really have to both watch our asses, and hunker down for political and ideological attacks that would have never happened before.

    Read my article from a few years ago:
    The Libertarian Freeman Revolution
    http://tinyurl.com/no26zmv

  214. CaptiveSlave   10 years ago

    I haven't read any comments, yet, so this may have been covered, but this article has misidentified the issue. The government's request for information is not anti-free speech. Anti-free speech is sending someone to the GULAG for 10 years for criticizing Stalin. Users' information being targeted won't hurt those users until they commit a crime. I don't care what government agencies acquire what information about me. I assume they already know everything about me. No one has infringed on my right to speak.

    1. x4rqcks3f v2.0   10 years ago

      While it's true that the request in and of itself does not infringe on the commenters' rights, the request does not exist in and of itself. The request is an implicit threat by the government to harm the commenters if the government decides it doesn't like their speech. So not only does it have the effect of suppressing speech, it also likely had the intent to do so.

      Anti-free speech is sending someone to the GULAG for 10 years for criticizing Stalin.

      A difference only in degree, not in kind.

    2. gabeh73   10 years ago

      they infringed on Reasons ability to talk about it and they then threatened reason

  215. Gman   10 years ago

    Sounds like Reason needs to go offshore to someplace with free speech.

    For real, stay in the USA and your credibility will always, to a degree, be in question because we never know if Reason is being threatened.

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  218. Go Blue 89   10 years ago

    There is a chance that Velamoor violated the Rules of Professional Responsibility in contacting you directly, once he knew that you were represented by an attorney. Specifically Rule 4.2, which states: "In representing a client, a lawyer shall not communicate about the subject of the representation with a person the lawyer knows to be represented by another lawyer in the matter, unless the lawyer has the consent of the other lawyer or is authorized to do so by law or a court order."

    Clearly he knew that you were represented by an attorney, so the issue is whether he was authorized by law. Prosecutors generally can communicate with represented people during an undercover investigation, but they cannot do so once a formal proceeding has begun. The question is whether the grand jury subpoena constituted the start of a proceeding.
    Just something to maybe look into.

    Full disclosure: I am just a law school grad studying for the Bar, not yet an attorney, and this analysis and understanding of the law may not be fully accurate, as I have not thoroughly researched the issue.

    1. In League with the Dark Ones   10 years ago

      Want to bet they're applying "or is authorized to do so by law or a court order"?

    2. Chumby   10 years ago

      Bo

      You care to elaborate on this?
      /sarc

  219. Ghetto Slovak Goatherder   10 years ago

    Been here a while as a reader, and I comment infrequently.

    I just want to pass along my thanks to Nick and Matt, but especially to the commenters. This place is the smartest, most intellectually honest place on the net. It's also gritty and edgy, which is appropriate in a culture like this.

    I hope the flame that is Reason will burn strongly for many years to come. With all the extra wood laying around here, perhaps that flame will become a bonfire symbolizing liberty and justice for all.

    1. anon   10 years ago

      When all you have is a woodchipper...

  220. CBear   10 years ago

    Reason,

    I'd like your opinion on something.

    Given that the nature of the comments that spurred this subpoena are so common one could find billions of examples all over the internet, probably from the last 24 hours alone, do you think the commenters were the target of Preet et al, or that you are the target?

    I'm inclined to think - as you noted - that because there were multiple ways to ascertain the identity of the commenters without asking you for their identities, that Reason was and is the target - probably because of your stories on the Silk Road case.

    There are some things that do not and did not smell right about the underlying case - the Baltimore agents, being just one part.

    I wonder what got under Team DOJ's skin? Keep pushing. Where there's smoke there's fire.

    1. Harvard   10 years ago

      Merely a naked attempt to chill overall dissent of the omnipresent government, nothing more. Expect this from government and the left. Nothing new here at all.

      1. CBear   10 years ago

        Yeah, except that it is new.

        They've never gotten a subpoena before.

        I think it would be less than factual to suppose that their ideological orientation is the problem.

        Let's face it. This administration has gone after Aaron Schwartz, James Rosen, Wiki Leaks, Snowden (and Greenwald, etc), the Tea Party, Occupy Wall Street...these are not exactly groups/persons whose ideologies are all peas in a pod.

        They (let me be specific, political prosecutors, the Obama Administration) goes after anyone who might present popular power and ideology that springs from spontaneous and genuine origin and seeks to persuade.

        But all they are really doing is making various factions realize we're united in some common beliefs and values and against those who attack our common beliefs and values.

        We're pluralists at bottom. Some people are not.

        1. Sevo   10 years ago

          "Let's face it. This administration has gone after Aaron Schwartz, James Rosen, Wiki Leaks, Snowden (and Greenwald, etc), the Tea Party, Occupy Wall Street...these are not exactly groups/persons whose ideologies are all peas in a pod."

          Why, you may be on to something here!

  221. DEATFBIRSECIA   10 years ago

    Good work Reason.

    A substantial donation is forthcoming.

    We are truly now at the stage right before we win where they are actually fighting us, on increasingly desperate terms, taking off the gloves, but then flailing about like a schoolyard bully that's never had to fight and just assumed, incorrectly, that he could whip any other kid on the playground.

    Now they've taken their "best shot," and their incompetence and mishandling have front-and-centered their exaggerated sense of their own power for the whole world to see.

    It's First Blood, and we took it.

  222. FtheJUDGE   10 years ago

    Wanna hear a joke? The judge from his trial. You can't tell me she doesn't get legitimate threats mailed to her. The people posting comments are simply venting their frustration with our filthy legal system. The undercover investigators were caught trying to leave the country with bitcoins they acquired through Silk Road and fake passports. That f'd judge couldn't let the jury hear any of that though. Might have cast a "shadow of doubt" as to Ul's being the dread pirate roberts. But we are in america where you are guilty until proven innocent.

  223. FtheJUDGE   10 years ago

    Wanna hear a joke? The judge from his trial. You can't tell me she doesn't get legitimate threats mailed to her. The people posting comments are simply venting their frustration with our filthy legal system. The undercover investigators were caught trying to leave the country with bitcoins they acquired through Silk Road and fake passports. That f'd judge couldn't let the jury hear any of that though. Might have cast a "shadow of doubt" as to Ul's being the dread pirate roberts. But we are in america where you are guilty until proven innocent.

  224. Ken Shultz   10 years ago

    You think "TOBAS" is bad?

    I saw a comment earlier today on another site, where someone wrote that so and so (a Republican politician) should be "raked over the coals".

    But will anyone call the U.S. Attorney's office?!

    I certainly hope not. And if anyone does, I hope the oafish U.S. Attorney's Office doesn't waste our tax dollars trying to scare the shit out of people for using standard idiomatic English online.

    But they do and we can prove it.

    And to think Nancy Pelosi says there's nothing left to cut. I can think of a couple of jobs that are just begging to be eliminated at the U.S. Attorney's Office for the Southern District of New York--right off the top of my head!

    P.S. My name is spelled K-E-N S-H-U-L-T-Z

  225. masculistman   10 years ago

    I just contacted Senator Rand Paul: http://www.paul.senate.gov/connect/email-rand
    Senator Mike Lee: http://www.lee.senate.gov/public/index.cfm/contact
    and let them know what is happening here. You guys may want to do the same because if they hear from a lot of us they'll listen and do something about it.

    1. masculistman   10 years ago

      Also let Senator Ted Cruz know as well: http://www.cruz.senate.gov/?p=email_senator

  226. anon   10 years ago

    Know Im late to the party, but just wanted to add my "thanks" in there. I know the shit I spew isn't worth reading, mostly, but they let me post my bullshit anyways, and even stand up for me to be able to post it. That takes balls. Reason has balls in a room full of bitches.

  227. Vincent Milburn   10 years ago

    This is the longest thing I have ever read online.

    1. Ken Shultz   10 years ago

      This may be our longest thread ever--and it was posted on a Friday!

      Did you read the whole thing?

      1. Vincent Milburn   10 years ago

        I read the article. I don't know that I'll finish the thread.

  228. Your English Teacher   10 years ago

    The thing is, the government cannot do this if the target is not compliant.

    These laws with inherent gag orders -- like the one used to go after Scott Walker in Wisconsin, also -- are inherently un-Constitutional, and the targets [especially an organization such as Reason, which not only has a significant international reach and reputation, but also very deep-pocketed friends] owe it to the rest of us to put together a full accounting of what is going on, and to release that information as far and as wide and as noisily as possible.

    If anything screams for civil disobedience, it is this kind of Gestapo-ish inquisition.

  229. beeZzzzz   10 years ago

    I'm afraid to leave a comment, Brrrrr

  230. dscotese   10 years ago

    "We had three options: We could 1) abide quietly with the subpoena, 2) attempt to quash it, and/or 3) alert the commenters named in the subpoena."

    The government is the servant of the people, ALL the people. If you ever get a communication from it that you don't like, please remember option #4:

    4) Publish whatever you get from the government immediately.

  231. adolphowisner   10 years ago

    It was interesting. I didn't mind the fact that there was no romantic interest. Gives you more time for action but you more nice video check this way and comment me
    Best Home Deal ??????? http://www.workweb40.com

  232. Hyperion's Statist Chipper   10 years ago

    1300+ comments?

    Why am I seeing a sidebar ad for a Father's Day sale on woodchippers?

  233. crab_apple   10 years ago

    OMG I MADE IT TO THE BOTTOM OF THE COMMENTS.... on Sunday at 2PM.

  234. tired dog   10 years ago

    Are those 'us attorneys' h1-b beneficiaries? Or student visa overstaying absconders? Their modus operandi smacks of a 3rd world upbringing.

    1. masculistman   10 years ago

      I was thinking the same thing.

  235. Your English Teacher   10 years ago

    "The original subpoena, received late on Tuesday, June 2, did not come with a gag order. However, it came with a letter from Bharara and Assistant U.S. Attorney Niketh Velamoor requesting that we refrain from informing any other parties about the subpoena so as to 'preserve the confidentiality of the investigation,' and that we notify his office in advance if we intended to do so, even though it also said that we were under 'no obligation' to keep the subpoena confidential.

    We had three options: We could 1) abide quietly with the subpoena, 2) attempt to quash it, and/or 3) alert the commenters named in the subpoena."

    How about option four, mysteriously missing from your list, but better than any of the three you limited yourself to: immediately go public with the subpoena, and alert the world to the impending death of liberty in America. By your own reporting, and the original letter's wording, nothing prevented Reason from immediately exposing this fascist action by the government. If you were unable to conceive of that option on your own, I am for hire as an advisor, and my first suggestion would be that you change the name of the publication to, "Lack of Reason".

    1. Old Man With Gag Order   10 years ago

      They have a superb lawyer and law firm. They were given legal advice. They followed it.

      They write daily about the impending death (I might argue that we're somewhat past "impending") of liberty in America. They can now continue to do so. Not that anyone is listening, sadly.

    2. Espantapajaros   10 years ago

      "immediately go public with the subpoena"

      Actually, they did. Wasn't it on H&R briefly? I read about the subpoena more than a week ago, and not from Popehat. I had been pinging H&R daily for news of it and I presumed they were unable to quash it.

    3. Sevo   10 years ago

      And you're suggesting actions that might well land them in jail.
      I might agree with you, but you'd have more cred if you had some history of taking such chances, since it's mighty easy to stand on the sideline and cheer on those in danger.
      Do you have any such history?

  236. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

    Last.

    1. JPyrate   10 years ago

      No I am last. =D

  237. Rapier Half-Witt   10 years ago

    Some 2,000 years ago the Chinese built the Great Wall. And at several times longer than the US-Mexico border it is astounding how our border was never secured. And because of the steadfast refusal of our brain fucked politicians we now have the very real threat of islamic terrorists living in America.

    And now because the FedGov is willingly and knowingly tying it's own hands and "all" of it's resources in chasing down the rude and boorish internet posters it will certainly make it much easier for any of the islamic terrorists already here in America to get away with death and mayhem.

    My very British (ex)wife told me repeatedly that Americans simply have no concept of irony. In the entire length of that marriage she has just now finally managed to make me feel stupid, thanks to the FedGov.

    1. JPyrate   10 years ago

      GOD DAMNIT !!! =D

    2. Old Man With Gag Order   10 years ago

      Congratulations, you have snatched the prize out of Michael Hihn's retarded claws.

  238. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

    Last.

  239. MarylandShooter   10 years ago

    We are gonna need a big-ass woodchipper to recycle all the paperwork this pointless exercise will generate.

    They all need to work the snotty end of a fuck-stick.

    Power crazy, Nazi, tyrant, dingbats.

    Get a life and stop squandering the public's tax money.

    The butt-hurt is strong on this and the judge needs to read the Bill of Rights a little closer.

    Yes, you are a stupid bitch, and vengeful as well. You are a disgrace to any person practicing law.

    You're good - for a bad example.

    Actions like this will only fuel contempt for you and all those like you as it should.

    Threat my ass . . . read the case law, dumb ass.

    1. GovIsViolence   10 years ago

      You don't need 23 choices of wood chippers and 18 choices of fuck-sticks when children are going hungry.
      - Bernie Sanders

  240. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

    Crusty isn't last

  241. jester   10 years ago

    Wow. I did it. Waded through the whole thread. and I might still be a pseudo-Libertarian if it hadn't been for those genius posts by Michael Hihn, that I may have missed if it weren't for the bold print that he knew it was his duty as a human being to use in order to separate his brilliant analysis from murderous tripe. Folks. In the end, the world has been saved. Thank you Michael. Please spend the rest of your life informing the rest of us because you are really really smart. I hope you take vitamins because we need you to live a long time. Have you considered running for office with all your amazing ideas! (swoons)

  242. nitohipu   10 years ago

    Google pay 97$ per hour my last pay check was $8500 working 1o hours a week online. My younger brother friend has been averaging 12k for months now and he works about 22 hours a week. I cant believe how easy it was once I tried it out.
    This is wha- I do...... ?????? http://www.netcash5.com

  243. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

    Last

    1. anon   10 years ago

      Liar.

  244. waffles   10 years ago

    was here. Spoke. Did nothing.

    Hooray!

  245. Vincent Milburn   10 years ago

    99% of internet boards are coarse, so I don't see why this one, which some might even consider tame, is giving libertarianism a bad name any more than any other comment section is giving its site or cause a bad name. Then again, maybe this is why so many web sites have removed comment sections.

  246. BlueCollarCritic   10 years ago

    Thank you Mr Gillespie for taking the stance of Freedom and Liberty! I may not always agree with your stance but I know with good faith that you will fight to defend my right to disagree with you just as much as to agree.

  247. BlueCollarCritic   10 years ago

    "Velamoor then suggested that Reason was "coming close" to interfering with the grand jury investigation. The call ended abruptly"

    This is how the government is legally (not Constitutionally) allowed to bully/intimidate persons seeking to exercise Constitutionally protected rights. Make no mistake about it, if they could void the US Constitution and do so without enough of the population being angered by it, the Federal Government would do it in a heart beat. It is the fear of what the many may do to the few if they should do too much that restrains the government and its agencies from taking too large a step down the path to tyranny and make no mistake about it, they are walking that path as hard and fast as they can.

  248. bacon-magic   10 years ago

    Last!
    Thanks Reason for being there for the woodchippin' 6 and the rest of the Reasonoids.

    My main take away from this thread- Michael Hihn is hated by 90% of the Libertarian party and 99% of the rest of humanity. Hopefully he will still be cared for by the nurses at the funny farm. Bless you Michael for the smelly pile of shit you are.

  249. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

    Last.

  250. JPyrate   10 years ago

    =D

  251. SimonJester753   10 years ago

    I would love to know if anyone has any statistics on the people who make public threats and if they follow through with actions.

    Did Oswald threaten to kill Kennedy? Did Booth threaten to kill Lincoln? I would tend to think that those prone to violent action would keep their mouths shut and act.

    I was once threatened in a public forum by someone I was arguing with. I posted my address. Years passed. He never showed up.

  252. SimonJester753   10 years ago

    I would love to know if anyone has any statistics on the people who make public threats and if they follow through with actions.

    Did Oswald threaten to kill Kennedy? Did Booth threaten to kill Lincoln? I would tend to think that those prone to violent action would keep their mouths shut and act.

    I was once threatened in a public forum by someone I was arguing with. I posted my address. Years passed. He never showed up.

  253. FuriousFatMan   10 years ago

    @Niketh V. Velamoor

    i hope you are never tried for your crimes... the only punishment for which is death.

    that enough to get you to send me a letter, assbag? reminding you that the crimes you are committing are punishable by DEATH? and that if the government refuses to charge you with those crimes, that that government has become TYRANNICAL and BY THE LAW OF THE CONSTITUTION SHOULD BE OVERTHROWN and the violators should be summarily executed?

    @Niketh V. Velamoor, go fuck yourself, Shill. you are a traitor, a coward, and per the supreme law of the united states, you deserve to be hanged.

    *middle finger*

    -FFM

    1. gabeh73   10 years ago

      valdemoor...I am not as brave as fat man....so I am only talking about the fictional harry potter guy...but valdemoor you do deserve to be in a wood chipper.

      PS I love harry potter

      1. gabeh73   10 years ago

        pss I didn't really even read harry potter and only saw one movie

        1. gabeh73   10 years ago

          I really don't see how it is free speech for a US government leg breaker to go around threatening political magazines that they can't talk about who the stasi are investigating...any legal eagle folks here brainwashed enough to believe this bullshit is legitimate in some way?

  254. Barry Gold   10 years ago

    Good for you! Don't be intimidated. THe whole idea of "National Security Letters" or any other excuse for the government telling you that you not only have to give them private information you have about somebody, but not even tell them so they can defend themselves in court, is against the principles that made America.

    Don't be intimidated. Stand up for truth and openness.

  255. gabeh73   10 years ago

    Hey Michael,

    You ever watch game of thrones?

    It is pretty popular in america

  256. gabeh73   10 years ago

    Discuss is a horrible piece of crap forum tool....I immediately discount the reliability of any news organization that uses the spy-tool-kit forum software.

  257. gabeh73   10 years ago

    Discuss is a horrible piece of crap forum tool....I immediately discount the reliability of any news organization that uses the spy-tool-kit forum software.

  258. gabeh73   10 years ago

    Discuss is a horrible piece of crap forum tool....I immediately discount the reliability of any news organization that uses the spy-tool-kit forum software.

  259. Dilligaf   10 years ago

    Last-ish!!! The unmoderated nature of the comments section here is what gives H&R it's vitality and keeps it from becoming the stale,stagnant echo chamber in a swamp that the vast majority of these places have become. It is what attracted me originally and has kept me coming back for years. I remember years ago jumping through all the hoops to comment on some other moderated sites on popular more MSM outlets back around 2011 during Ron Pauls last run (both NeoCon and Proggy). There were of course all manner of ridiculous and extreme commenters that were allowed to post and spew forth their opinions,and every time I would post a polite succinct, non profane refutation of whatever it was that being discussed it would be deleted or not even posted if the moderators thought it was too good a point or not in line with the group think. Contrary to Mr. Hihns longing for "moderated" comments I would never want to go to turn this into one of those pseudo-free speech zones. And the commenters here generally do an excellent job of tossing the more obnoxious trolls,sock puppets and idiots through the wood chipper in short order. It is not for everyone, like children and the easily offended but I wouldn't have it any other way. Thank You for this forum. Don't change a thing and keep up the good work Reason.

  260. Dilligaf   10 years ago

    Je Suis Broyeuse !! (Wood Chipper) Best handle evar, I would so steal this one if it hadn't already been homesteaded. Talking to you Je Suis Wood Chipper.

    1. Luxe Calendar   6 years ago

      And props to 7:01. And Popehat. And a hat tip to

  261. JPyrate   10 years ago

    ?

  262. Danny Sprinkle   10 years ago

    The judge who ruled in this case, and her defenders, should all be rounded up, force fed the barbecued flesh of Ganesha smothered in garlic and onions, and marched onto a giant spaceship headed for the black hole at the center of the Milky Way. And their kids too. And that's my real name, bitches...

  263. TxJack 112   10 years ago

    First the idiots who made the comments illustrate one of the most basic problems with the internet which is the anonymity leads people to make outrageous and insane comments. However, the much greater danger is the Court going after those people and attempting to punish them for what the SCOTUS has just recently ruled is protected speech. The left continues push a false narrative that "hate" speech is not protected when in fact they mean offensive speech. The 1st amendment was written to protect speech the government might find as offensive as a way for the people to maintain sovereignty over it. The fact a judge does not get that most basic truth is very scary.

  264. TxJack 112   10 years ago

    I am not surprised the court order was out of New York considering it is the epitome of progressive government overreach as is its sister state, California. When a representative of the Court attempts to silence or limit free speech, we as a nation, have a much bigger problem.

  265. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

    Last. Again.

  266. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

    Last.

    1. BuSab Agent   10 years ago

      Give it up Crusty my man, you'll never be last.

  267. William Pilgrim   10 years ago

    This is a grossly ill-advised action by the jack-booted thugs that we pay our good money to abuse us.

  268. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

    LAST

  269. JakeRake   10 years ago

    The other side of the story is what happens to the commenters. There is a formal process for destroying these people. Essentially, the government uses high tech stalking and electronic harassment to make these people seem paranoid and crazy. These people are followed around, and groups will perform street theater to harass these folks. Their houses are broken into -although nothing of value is taken. All their communications are monitored and they are made aware of the fact. It's a psychological warfare campaign waged by the government, domestically, against citizens. This is the sort of thing the 4th Amendment guarantees will not happen. Many tens of thousands of people know this is going on, but not enough people are stepping up to stop the crimes. These folks are called "Targeted Individuals," and their claims are based in fact.

    1. Product Placement   10 years ago

      Here is to hoping it will be as pleasant as all that.

      make these people seem paranoid and crazy.
      Check. Did that for them already.

      groups will perform street theater to harass these folks.
      I'm housebound, so I guess they could knock on windows and sing sonnets.

      All their communications are monitored and they are made aware of the fact.
      I've always assumed this was true. This is a know fact. Isn't it?

      Their damage has already been done by causing me to censor myself a lot more and showing me I don't really have the courage of my convictions.

      Garth Bigelow
      One of Six

      PS: Thanks to Reason for the actions they took. I never responded until now but it was and is appreciated.

  270. ReeceWoodchipper   10 years ago

    http://www.examiner.com/articl.....n-magazine

  271. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

    STOP POSTING

    LAST DAMNIT

  272. AS   10 years ago

    Should web sites be located outside the US in order to protect free speech?

  273. SIV   10 years ago

    Option 3

    "The commenters are hiding in the attic"

  274. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

    Last.

  275. Calvinus   10 years ago

    Another example of why we need to abolish the grand jury process and replace it with something more accountable.

  276. sudon't   10 years ago

    I can't afford an attorney, so I guess I'll watch what I say.

    Wait, I use a VPN. Into the wood-chipper!

  277. Bruce D   10 years ago

    There needs to be a 4th branch of government or a separate "meta-government" or "counter-government" specifically tasked with prosecuting and imprisoning or executing government officials for their evil official actions.

    It should be elected separately from the regular government. To prevent usurpation by government, one would only have the right to vote or be an official in either the counter-government or regular government but not both. Those dissatisfied with government evil would vote or be officials in the meta-government. Those who support government evil would be officials in the regular government.

    One could file charges against any government official or officer. If a jury of 12 or even a majority of 8 found that the government officer's or official's official actions a violation of individual rights, an evil, then that official or officer would be imprisoned, or executed if the official action resulted in death.

    There would be no formal criminal code in the meta-government. Rather, ignorance of right reason and moral law would be no excuse for government evil. Doing one's government "job" would be no excuse either. If a government official's job involved evil, the official would be prosecuted for doing his or her job.

    That way evil people like Forrest could be legally prosecuted by the meta-government and imprisoned for her evil official actions. She certainly deserves to spend ten seconds in prison for every second the hero Ross Ulbricht spends in prison.

  278. (??o?)???]????   10 years ago

    Good to see that the comments on this article went for several weeks. This is the best place on the internet, despite the Tonies and Hihns who sully our ranks. I sincerely love the commentariat here.

    Also, Crusty: LAST (for now).

  279. algeria   9 years ago

    thank you

    ..........................
    algeria

  280. Playa Manhattan.   9 years ago

    LAST

    1. SQRLSY One   8 years ago

      Nu-unh! I'm last! I shall have the last Trump of all!

      Trumpty Dumpty, He's quite off-the-wall,
      Trumpty Dumpty won't stay in His toilet stall
      He just goes ahead and takes His shits,
      Totally regardless of whereever He sits
      Whenever He simply, no way, can sleep,
      He Twits us His thoughts, they're all SOOO deep!
      He simply must, He MUST, Twit us His bird,
      No matter the words, however absurd!
      He sits and snorts His coke with a spoon,
      Then He brazenly shoots us His moon!
      They say He'll be impeached by June,
      Man, oh man, June cannot come too soon!
      So He sits and jiggles His balls,
      Then He Twitters upon the walls
      "Some come here to sit and think,
      Some come here to shit and stink
      But I come here to scratch my balls,
      And read the writings on the walls
      Here I sit, My cheeks a-flexin'
      Giving birth to another Texan!
      He who writes these lines of wit,
      Wraps His Trump in little balls,
      He who reads these lines of wit,
      Eats those loser's balls of shit!"

  281. SalmaG   8 years ago

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  282. SalmaG   8 years ago

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  283. SalmaG   8 years ago

    SEO Company

  284. John Kirno   7 years ago

    http://linkbun.ch/06y97
    http://ow.ly/uGMK30jQy3f

  285. Lola Barnett   7 years ago

    Nerves carry their signals in herpes blitz protocol review much the same way this code was used to send messages. visit us

  286. Brochettaward   10 years ago

    Because the place would be flooded with spam bots if they didn't.

  287. JPyrate   10 years ago

    Except for anonbot. I can't decide whether it is a pet, mascot, food animal, or AI Overlord. =)

  288. Slocum   10 years ago

    For IP addresses, the problem is that IPv4 addresses are too small -- brute force approaches could overcome the one-way hash quickly. It might work for IPv6 though.

  289. Irish Says Enough Woodchippers   10 years ago

    Shut the fuck up, Hihn, no one asked you.

    God, you're tiresome. Have you taken your senility meds today, since you clearly and rather desperately need them.

  290. JPyrate   10 years ago

    Hey Hihn.

    FUCK OFF

  291. Irish Says Enough Woodchippers   10 years ago

    Also, where do you get these percentages?

    "From the original report linked in the article, which only 5-7% of readers will click."

    That's a pretty specific number - almost as specific as you claiming 57% of LIBERTARIANS (always in all caps, because Michael Hihn understands cap lock exists for a reason) don't self-identify as libertarian because ANTI-GUMMINT RHETORIC.

    Maybe your random numbers are actually evidence of your clear and obvious descent into the depths of age-related Alzheimer's rather than being based on anything describable as 'facts' or 'evidence.'

  292. Sevo   10 years ago

    Michael Hihn|6.20.15 @ 12:31AM|#
    "[...]What of the visitors who drop in, some curious about libertarianism?[...]"

    Yeah, Mike what of them? Maybe they'll run into some worn-out apologist like you and wonder why in hell they should bother.
    Mike, I'm as old as you are but not as "old" as you are. You need to retire; your pitch hit the wall years ago.

  293. AFSlade   10 years ago

    Mr. Hihn - The wikipedia on Near v. Minnesota is telling. There, as here, Near ran a small local paper that reported on the scandals of local politicians, including gambling, racketeering, graft - you know, the usual, right? So they passed the Minnesota Gag Law of 1925... "Near's critics called his paper a scandal sheet, and alleged that he tried to extort money threatening to publish attacks on officials and others." (from wikipedia). The Supreme Court struck it down.

    Every subsequent case has held the same, even during time of war - which was the one exception Near implied (in dicta) might exist. See "The Pentagon Papers" case.

    In short, what fucking "precedent" were these idiots relying upon?? What have they possibly convinced themselves of in the echo chamber of the SDNY??

    And your concerned about the libertarian "brand" because people use swears or hyperbolic comments? How dumb are you? I mean, did you start that way or did you have to work at it? As between a US Atty abusing his authority, a magistrate judge going along with it, subpoenas being issued, then gag orders, and you're worried about how the "commentariat" might "look" to... what? Potential voters? Joiners of the cause?

    You're the reason our overlords think they can get away with this. People are concerned about what others may think. This country was founded on "fuck you."

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xdfeXqHFmPI

  294. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

    Hey Hihn, take your blood pressure meds, lay back on your pillow, and close your eyes. Once you're nice and relaxed, you can lick my taint and suck my balls. It'll be the best thing that ever happened to you.

  295. JPyrate   10 years ago

    IMO Hinh. No one needs a lecture from you, on how to keep your "Sterling Libertarian" reputation among the Fascist community that you live among. I do not care about your political career. Considering you say you have lead it for so many years, and left it in ruins.

  296. Agammamon   10 years ago

    Here's how essentially all of us were portrayed:

    Really? Just that?

    So this means nothing?

    http://reason.com/blog/2015/06.....nt_5384616

    http://reason.com/blog/2015/01.....nt_5042685

    Because, god knows, someone popping in would only see that one comment and run screaming from the site forever. None of them will see cogent arguments made (pro and con) elsewhere, the pointing out where people are making logical mistakes, where they move goal-posts, where their data is out of date or explained how it was misinterpreted.

    None of that because we don't spend all our time here with your laser-like focus on pushing a libertarian agenda.

  297. BuSab Agent   10 years ago

    Concern troll is concerned.

  298. Chumby   10 years ago

    Mike

    Plrase tell us that it is incidents like these that most libertarians (91% from a poll?) do not identify as such.

  299. Limpee Wiltstock   10 years ago

    They only saying what everybody else should be thinking but is too cowardly and meanspiritted.

  300. DesigNate   10 years ago

    None of that information has been white washed. It has been actively talked about since day one.

  301. Sevo   10 years ago

    Michael Hihn|6.20.15 @ 12:35AM|#
    "Yeah, libertarians need to be seen as thugs, even more than we were disgraced here"

    Mike, no one was "disgraced" here, except suck-ups who hope the authorities don't bother them.
    Would that me you, Mike?

  302. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

    GET OFF OF MY LAWN

  303. JPyrate   10 years ago

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ta-Z_psXODw

  304. Limpee Wiltstock   10 years ago

    Oh, yeah, our fucking honour has been schmutzed, our good name befouled. I remember before the Reason commenters started their shenanigans, libertarians was respected everywhere and anywhere in this country, if a man spoke out for liberty, folks shut up and listen and thought very carefully. But now, they been dishonoured and it's all gone to hell in a hambasket.

  305. Sevo   10 years ago

    Would that me you, Mike?

    Would that be you, Mike?
    Muy betta.

  306. JPyrate   10 years ago

    ^ This. FUCK YOU. =D

  307. Migrant Log Chipper   10 years ago

    Right fucking on Slade, well stated.

  308. WoodchipperFocus(ed)   10 years ago

    *applause*

  309. Sevo   10 years ago

    "[...]How dumb are you?[...]"

    Plenty dumb and then a whole lot more.

  310. JPyrate   10 years ago

    I like you AF Slade. =)

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f55CqLc6IR0

  311. OneOut   10 years ago

    Wow.

    Sockpuppet or the brotherhood of the progsters ?

    Didn't take you long to come to the defense of your fellow traveler Hiln..

  312. Mark22   10 years ago

    He or she is probably younger than your mid 70s and their accompanying senility and mental rigidity.

  313. Irish Says Enough Woodchippers   10 years ago

    "The right of free speech includes the right to be totally fucking stupid, but it's not a requirement!"

    A lesson you should probably take to heart given your consistently poor commenting output.

  314. Mark22   10 years ago

    When it comes to "blowhard stupidity of Reason's commenting peanut gallery", your name comes to mind near the top of the list, Michael Hihn.

  315. listening2grasshoppers   10 years ago

    That seems only fair.....we seem not to hold our politicians running for president to those standards.

  316. Irish Says Enough Woodchippers   10 years ago

    MICHAEL HIHN ANGRY, MICHAEL HIHN SOIL DEPENDS

  317. Sevo   10 years ago

    Hey! That's MY line!

  318. AFSlade   10 years ago

    Cheers, JP.

    And who doesn't like some heavy metal banjo?

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e4Ao-iNPPUc

  319. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

    When he's here, he usurps your crazy old man street cred.

  320. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

    Don't do that, you fucking idiot.

    I'm 90% sure you're a federal agent anyway.

  321. Agammamon   10 years ago

    Because its funny that *we're* portrayed that way - but no one seems to have a problem with the sewers that are liberal/conservative sites.

  322. Francisco d'Anconia   10 years ago

    I'm wondering why you stopped taking your meds?

  323. Chip Dalasio   10 years ago

    I'm wondering if, like our other self-appointed arbiter of the One True Libertarianismtm, you aren't nothing more than a progressive troll

  324. Pompey   10 years ago

    God damn are you ever a tedious cunt.

  325. Harold Falcon   10 years ago

    Wow, you're a fucking asshole retard, aren't you?

  326. crab_apple   10 years ago

    (yawn)

  327. Carolynp   10 years ago

    I'm wondering why people who post prose longer than the initial article don't understand that they are boring and foolish.

  328. Mark22   10 years ago

    I'm wondering about when I moderated the first online libertarian forums at CompuServe in 1993

    Yes, we get it, you're a long time libertarian bigwig. Now let's measure you by your success: how much has the Libertarian party actually advanced under people like you? Looks to me like you have been a complete and utter failure.

    So, I'm wondering why my generation of libertarians should listen to your generation of libertarians.

    I'm wondering if new libertarians still learn that NAP is for intrapersonal behavior, not just gummint.

    Words are not "initiation of force". Calling someone an "idiot" is not aggression, it is a sign of disrespect. Since political power derives from the respect and credibility people enjoy, it is intended to reduce the target of the insult of that.

    So, in that spirit, Michael Hihn, write your personal version of libertarian principles on a stiff index card, fold it until it's all corners, and stuff it up your oubliette. Any questions?

  329. Vincent Milburn   10 years ago

    I, for one, love the comments section. It may be the funniest thing on the entire internet, at least to me.

    I don't judge libertarianism based un cussed-mouth internet commenters, though. That would be shallow. I suppose others might.

  330. Warrren   10 years ago

    Playa hates captchas!

  331. Pl?ya Manhattan.   10 years ago

    To be clear, this was in reply to a now deleted comment, not to Beam Me Up Scotty.

  332. Grand Moff Serious Man   10 years ago

    It's funny if you read it as you screaming at Nick.

  333. Francisco d'Anconia   10 years ago

    I score you as the village idiot.

  334. juris imprudent   10 years ago

    Being told to shut the fuck up because you are a tiresome douche is not a sign of thuggery Michael. Intelligent dissent is more than welcome here, sadly too much of the dissent we get comes from you, or Tony or other intellectual moths.

    Violence, other than to language as progressives are prone to do, would not consist of simply unpleasant words conveyed over electronic means. Violence is an action. A threat of violence is the spoken intent to do such an action.

    Sometimes we here like to contemplate visiting violence upon some thing or some one that transgresses against our principles, starting with the NAP. We might even speak openly of such thoughts. But neither those thoughts nor words are actual violence except perhaps to the insanely cowardly or those feigning the sensitivities of fairy tale princesses.

  335. Migrant Log Chipper   10 years ago

    Bingo, Bu, hey does that count as alliterative?

  336. Quixote   10 years ago

    Anyone is obviously entitled to find a satire inept, a comment stupid, and so on and so forth. But that, of course, is not the issue. The issue, quite simply, is what Judge Lippman describes, in his dissenting opinion in the case I linked above, as an "atavism at odds with the First Amendment and the free and uninhibited exchange of ideas it is meant to foster." The line that separates democracy from fascism is thinner than it might seem, and the very real consequences of the "conservative" efforts of Volokh and a good number of other American academics have yet to be fully measured, or indeed even discussed at all, on blogs and websites like Popehat and Reason. The same is true of Lippman's dissent itself, which has of course been carefully ignored by our grand "freedom of speech" editorial writers.

  337. Pathogen   10 years ago

    "My turn: How many will NEVER visit here, NEVER explore libertarianism, NEVER vote for a libertarian ?. because they read the vicious aggression that you thugs are so proud of?

    Who could ever describe non-aggression to them?"

    And what sites would these fragile people come here from? Do you read the the postings on political websites? The discourse in any given thread on politico, or the hill, huffpo, etc make this "violent and aggressive rhetoric" seem rather tame in comparison.

  338. Old Man With Gag Order   10 years ago

    I'm 73 years old

    So will die soon. There is at least something positive coming out of this.

  339. juris imprudent   10 years ago

    Very impressed with your self aren't you Mike. All that work you put in, and look where the LP is today.

    That says something, doesn't it?

  340. retiredfire   10 years ago

    Except that it is NOT satire to pose as someone else and make statements that bring scorn onto the one you are posing as.

  341. Harold Falcon   10 years ago

    You write so many words yet say nothing. What the fuck is your point with that meandering shitfest of a post?

  342. lafe.long   10 years ago

    MORE bullshit (OMG) 59% of Americans self-define as libertarian, Cato survey. Only 9% of THEM identified as libertarian, which is ? tada ? a 91% rejection rate of the libertarian label by libertrarians.

    Please. Stop.

    First of all, (from your oft-linked Cato page) the Zogby poll was from 2006 - almost a decade ago.

    Secondly, the poll consisted of a total of 1,012 voters in the 2006 election. 91% of that would be ~920 people.

    920 individuals hardly constitutes "91% of ALL libertarians reject the brand OMGWTFBBQ1!1!".

    Also from the same Zogby poll:

    A robust 44 percent of respondents answered "yes" to that question, accepting a self-description as "libertarian."

    So please just stop... or perhaps commission your own poll to get better results to support your claim.

  343. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

    'Old man with death certificate.'

  344. Sevo   10 years ago

    "Hmm, how anyone dent the rather vicious threats there"

    Yeah, that special place in hell is pretty threatening, right?

  345. Ken Shultz   10 years ago

    TOBAS is idiomatic.

    It's supposed to be a reference to a rabid dog or a horse with a broken leg.

    It generally means something is no longer useful.

    People say their old beat up cars should be TOBAS.

    Saying "heads should roll for this" isn't a violent threat either. Neither is saying you want to see so and so's "head on a platter".

    The English language is highly idiomatic, and just because we're libertarians doesn't mean we have to stop using the English language.

  346. CBear   10 years ago

    You know, Mr. Hihn, in my tribe ya gotta prove it; assumptions are not proof.

    So, who died and made you King of Language?

    Some judges - notably the stinker on the Twitter/Bachman matter - make complete self-contradictory, mish-mash of the law, not because they're stupid, but because they're arrogant and goal-oriented. They do not wish to be restrained by the law while they attempt to apply it to others. Hypocrites, and criminals. How ironic.

    Here's one approach: only "true" "threats" of unlawful acts do not fall under the umbrella and penumbra of the First Amendment.

    Kindly prove that you know what these commenters were talking about. You can't, and that's just one little, tiny problem in a sea of problems here.

    Don't even get me started on the use of the words "should," "hope," "will," etc. Because those words have decisive importance in precedent. Turns out we've litigated this issue a couple of times in our country's history.

    If this ever gets litigated the DOJ will lose. Too bad some other learned hands invented a meaning for the 11th Amendment that gives prosecutors a 'get out of the Constitution free' card, or Preet, et al could be sued for what they are doing.

  347. Brochettaward   10 years ago

    You are the reason that 92% of libertarians deny the libertarian label despite the Nolan chart.

  348. Limpee Wiltstock   10 years ago

    Yes, because they's looking forward to getting into the general population.

  349. Sevo   10 years ago

    I'll hang my head in shame, not!

  350. Sevo   10 years ago

    Michael Hihn|6.20.15 @ 7:50AM|#
    "Not sure what you mean."

    Mike, he means you're a dumb shit; he's making fun of you, as everyone should.
    You should just hire a crane to pick up your ego and go someplace. Anyplace.
    Just go away.

  351. Chumby   10 years ago

    Mike

    While living in Wash State, were you ever the Exec Director of the Spokane NAACP?

  352. Djucational Woodchipper   10 years ago

    A reply comment I saw on Politico just today:

    "the only haters I see are gay nazi hating losers like you

    hell waits for you

    thank God."

    *emphasis mine*

    It's a good thing that Preet Bharara will be going after him, right?

  353. roland_capers   10 years ago

    Michael, I'm one of these 'new libertarians' of which u speak, and honestly, ur comments are at the top of the most 'off-putting'.
    you're bitching about remarks here? Is this ur first day on the internet? I only ask because NO ONE who has spent any amount of time anywhere on the web would assume that people are so stupid when exposed to a comment section.
    u come off as a bitter, old, tired fuck.
    maybe just something for u to think about.
    peace

  354. Carolynp   10 years ago

    ^This.

  355. Quixote   10 years ago

    Oh yeah? Maybe you're being satirical? Check out the Yes Men, or read the famous Letters of Obscure Men, published 500 years ago, many of which were "signed" by leading academic deans and dons of the time. That satire was so deceptively conceived that monks around Europe thought they were reading actual letters. Only in the second volume (1517) did it become "clear" that the work was satirical. Confusion about satire is a common phenomenon, just as people often don't "get" ironic statements and get into huffy exchanges about them online. In the email texts criminalized in New York, a distinguished academic department chairman was portrayed as authoring a series of crude "confessions," including: "if I had given credit to this man, I would have been banned from conferences around the world" and "it feels as if my beard has been set on fire" (an apparent reference to a scene in Gormenghast by Mervin Peake). It is hard to see how anyone could believe such preposterous statements; indeed, the chairman himself testified that no one did believe them. These texts are obviously in the nature of satire, despite the display of cultural ignorance by certain arrogant individuals. I note that Eugene Volokh himself confessed some time ago to only recently learning the meaning of the word "pasquinade." Quite an admission for a "First Amendment" authority.

  356. Chumby   10 years ago

    Mike

    Consider, (rides away in Little Rascal scooter)
    It seems more plausible.

  357. Chumby   10 years ago

    Would it be a threat to say this:
    "When (if?) OJ Simpson gets out of jail, I hope he and Preet start dating. And I later hope that Preet dumps him and starts seeing other people."

  358. kbolino   10 years ago

    It might work for IPv6 though.

    In order to implement effective filtering of users based on IPv6 address, you would only use the most significant 64 bits of the address. That alone puts things back into the realm of brute force. Factor in some knowledge about the targets (e.g. US residential subscribers), and you could likely reduce the problem space considerably.

    And that's assuming IPv6 deployment were universal, which it isn't (hell, Reason doesn't even have an IPv6 DNS record). Right now, it would probably be much easier to identify IPv6 users than IPv4 ones.

  359. Mark22   10 years ago

    Using IP addresses for spam filtering isn't very effective (just look at all the spam postings), and it doesn't require associating them with individual non-spam posts.

  360. kbolino   10 years ago

    Libertarians are always so tolerant.

    Like you, who laughs at and berates anyone who disagrees with him? How many insults have you thrown? Your "tolerance" is no greater than anyone else's, Michael.

  361. Ken Shultz   10 years ago

    According to the Supreme Court in Watts v. United States 1969, specifically threatening to shoot President Lyndon Johnson was protected by the First Amendment if it's hyperbole and/or said within a political context.

    "now I have already received my draft classification as 1-A and I have got to report for my physical this Monday coming. I am not going. If they ever make me carry a rifle the first man I want to get in my sights is L. B. J."

    http://tinyurl.com/oscjl3j

    Other cases have held, for years, that advocating violence in the overthrow of the United States government is protected speech, which is the worst possible misconstrued interpretation of "TOBAS". And it wouldn't it be amazing if that weren't protected!

    The framers gave us the Second Amendment specifically so that we could arm ourselves and fight a standing army to overthrow the federal government if it ever became necessary to do so. Why assume they didn't write the First Amendment to protect our right to advocate violently overthrowing the government?

    And let's not forget that the newspapers and speeches during the run up to the American Revolution were incredibly incendiary against the government--the framers knew exactly what sort of incendiary speech they were protecting. Some of them made those kinds of speeches themselves!

  362. jester   10 years ago

    under prevailing law...yes?

  363. Ken Shultz   10 years ago

    None of the comments in the subpoena rise to that level because they're idiomatic. They aren't violent threats. But--even if they were--all of the statements in that subpoena would still be fully protected by the First Amendment. ...not only by a libertarian interpretation of the First Amendment but also by the Supreme Court's interpretation of the First Amendment in Brandenburg v. Ohio and elsewhere.

  364. kbolino   10 years ago

    That's why the founders included an impeachment clause. The appellate structure is there to resolve disputes of law, not to allow criminal activities to fester for decades while the victims wait for a higher judge to deign to grant appeal.

  365. Bronwyn   10 years ago

    Boy, the squirrels nailed you, HARD

  366. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

    Are we not doing phrasing anymore?

  367. kevrob   10 years ago

    No REAL AHHHMURRRICAN spells "honor" with a "u."

    Where's your Green Card, Limpee? 🙂

    Kevin R

  368. Marshall Gill   10 years ago

    Then I thought about the idealism and the excitement I felt for liberty in 1974. Then about someone on the Internet for a single day, discovering Reason in popehat, reading all the vicious hatred spewed by libertarians ?

    If it helps burst your bubble of smug, I am glad to be a part of it. You are as bad as this imbecile judge. Calling you a piece of shit, self important turd, isn't a fucking threat, nor is it aggression. It is an opinion of which the majority of human beings on the entire planet who have ever encountered you would most surely agree.

    If my posting in the most nasty ways gives you a sad, I don't ever want to stop doing it. Go someplace and royally fuck yourself.

  369. Marshall Gill   10 years ago

    Chip, Hihn is simply suffering from dementia. Pity him.

  370. Marshall Gill   10 years ago

    I'm the one who helped structure the party in 1974.

    You mean the party that nominated Bob Barr? THAT party? Yeah, I can see your hand in that giant clusterfuck.

  371. Limpee Wiltstock   10 years ago

    it's metaphourickal.

  372. DEATFBIRSECIA   10 years ago

    So let me see if I've got this right:

    Michael Hihn refrains from engaging in hyperbole which an opportunistic federal judge would find actionable, patiently doing so for decades, and the best he can do is get Robert Sarvis 6.5% of the vote in the Virgina governor's race, followed by 2.43% the next year when he ran for Virgina Senate. OK, that's better than Roger McBride's quarter percent presidential tally in 76, but still about the best the LP can do in any election cycle is "beat previous record [losing] percentages." Yawn.

    Six Reason commenters actually engage in hyperbolic, and apparently actionable speech, and draw some negative attention to themselves, and this website, yes, but then proceed to draw quite a bit of unfavorable attention to an out-of-control witch hunt the feds are engaging in, causing widespread debate, and giving a much-needed kick in the ass to folks who previously thought All Was Well.

    Michael, I'm going to have to go with Team Hyperbolic Speech, since they peeled back the AUSA's mask, while simultaneously uniting the commentariat here at Reason.

    But I wish you well, in your decades quest to eventually push the LP share up past 15%. Good Luck with that.

  373. Ken Shultz   10 years ago

    Obviously "raked over the coals" is idiomatic for a severe scolding.

    Just like "TOBAS" is idiomatic for saying that something is useless--like a horse with a broken leg.

    That was the point, Mike.

    For instance, here's a list of TV shows that need to be taken out back and shot.

    http://twistingandshouting.com.....k-and-shot

    Here's a list of words that should be taken out back and shot:

    http://gawker.com/four-words-t.....1579471359

    English is idiomatic. When people say that "heads should roll", they're not threatening those people with the guillotine. They're saying that they should lose their jobs.

    When someone says something needs to be taken out back and shot, they just mean that it's useless.

    Only you and Tulpa needs these things spelled out for you so carefully--and there isn't anything idiomatic about that.

  374. Ken Shultz   10 years ago

    Is your hatred of the libertarians here so thorough that you actually hope that the American people will think that being harassed by the U.S. Attorney's Office over protected speech is humiliating?

    You should take up yoga or something.

    Get some Reiki.

  375. anon   10 years ago

    Have you no concern for the public humiliation of libertarianism to millions of Americans?

    lol'd. Most libertarians with concern for public humiliation don't remain libertarians long.

    I hold my opinion of myself, and more importantly, what's Just, above any opinion some fuckwad sitting in his underwear jacking it to the thought of boning my mom does any and every day of the week.

  376. Sevo   10 years ago

    Michael Hihn|6.20.15 @ 9:51PM|#
    "Have you no concern for the public humiliation of libertarianism to millions of Americans?"

    Oh, for pete's sake!
    MIKE, POST IN ALL CAPS AND BOLD TO SHOW YOU REALLY MEAN THAT PILE OF SHIT YOU'RE HANDING OUT!
    AND MIKE, DO YOU CONTRACT WITH ALLIED VAN LINES TO MOVE YOUR EGO AROUND WITH YOU? I KNOW IT'S TOO DAMN BIG FOR AN IGNORANT OLD FART LIKE YOU TO CARRY!
    Oh, and fuck off, you tired shit.

  377. Ken Shultz   10 years ago

    "Only you and Tulpa needs these things spelled out for you so carefully"

    Well, only you, Tulpa, and the U.S. Attorney's Office.

    That doesn't put you in good company, Mike.

  378. Pompey   10 years ago

    (laughing, in a not snide, self-important, tedious cunt way)

  379. anon   10 years ago

    Wait, does Tulpa work there? Cause that would explain a lot.

  380. Sevo   10 years ago

    Ken,
    There are times your patience is amazing, especially when dealing with ignorant assholes like Mike.
    I guess you're to be applauded for doing so, but if that left-over piece of meat hasn't learned by now that the gov't, rather than the speaker is the problem, I'm not sure you're gonna get it through his thick skull with a jack-hammer, let alone rational presentation.

  381. anon   10 years ago

    Wow, I see a dipshit unworthy of the time I'm spending to write a retort to.

    Why is your dick so hard for moderation?

    Is coerced silence really the only tool left to you fuckwads? Are you finally out of bullshit?

  382. anon   10 years ago

    Also, Mike, if you and your ilk are responsible for where the LP is today, then I think your failures have already done quite enough damage. At a certain point, dare I say, you might consider investing in a woodchipper.

  383. Sevo   10 years ago

    Michael Hihn|6.20.15 @ 10:16PM|#
    "It's called shoot the messenger -- for bringing bad news"

    Sorry, Mike. It's calling the bullshitter on bullshit.
    Did you're mommy tell you that you were smart? If so, she lied. You're a tired old egomaniac who has an opinion of himself entirely unsupported by fact.
    ------------------------------
    "Loyal libertarians may have missed this, I save this entire page every 15 minutes, automatically. For later submission to the Reason Foundation Board and the Kochs.
    Will they tolerate these actions?"

    Gee, guys, Mike is gonna tell on us!
    Hint, Mike; you don't have to 'save' the page. It's not going anywhere. If you want to link it, help yourself, you worthless old piece of crap.

  384. Ken Shultz   10 years ago

    Being hassled for political speech by the U.S. Attorney's Office is nothing to be ashamed of, and when I looked at comments all over the interwebs, I was surprised to see that most of the comments were sympathetic to the commenters--even after they saw what the commenters wrote.

    The commenters at NP freakin' R were on our side.

    Being hassled by the U.S. Attorney's Office for political speech online isn't anything to be ashamed of, and very few people who write a comment anywhere--from a news site to their own damn Facebook page--are likely to be sympathetic to the U.S. Attorney going after their fellow Americans for protected speech.

  385. Ken Shultz   10 years ago

    No, it's just that Tulpa likes to be willfully obtuse--it's one of his dead giveaways.

    ...and Mike apparently likes to be willfully obtuse, too.

    TOBAS is an idiom?! Huh?

    How many more times do we have to say it before Mike gets it?

  386. Sevo   10 years ago

    Ken Shultz|6.20.15 @ 11:37PM|#
    "Being hassled for political speech by the U.S. Attorney's Office is nothing to be ashamed of, and when I looked at comments all over the interwebs, I was surprised to see that most of the comments were sympathetic to the commenters--even after they saw what the commenters wrote."

    It seems most of them qualified the support with a sentence or two about how the comments were 'vulgar', which is so much social signaling, much as mid-brows once denied watching TV (as a low brow, I only watch NASCAR, Mike!)
    Anyhow, all that noise is pretty transparent; how would they know the level of comment here unless they lurked here enough to know.
    And for all of Mike's fatuous tut-tutting, what was posted that evening is far from the worst that's been posted here. I've stated many times that the world would be a better place if commie-kid lived in the USSR and was murdered by Stalin, and similarly, if Tony's mom had selected to abort that lefty POS.

  387. Ken Shultz   10 years ago

    He's supposed to be an old school libertarian, isn't he?

  388. Ken Shultz   10 years ago

    Also, most of that "patience" is for the lurkers.

    Last stat I saw said that Reason.com gets 4 million hits a month.

    A nice chunk of those people just read the articles, but for every one person that comments, there are probably hundreds of lurkers.

    The trolls sometimes ask questions the lurkers are thinking about, and I'd hate for all those people to think we didn't have any answers.

    Christians have a concept called "witnessing". Basically, you try to treat everybody--including third parties--as if they're watching you and they're a potential convert.

    They took over the Roman Empire that way.

  389. crab_apple   10 years ago

    LOL more evidence for the Kochs, what does that non-sequitur even mean? Reason has done more for expanding libertarian ideas than anything you've ever done. No one knows or cares who you are.

  390. Sevo   10 years ago

    Yeah, but there are plenty of 'old school libertarians' who are willing to blame the speaker rather than the gov't. That just means they really aren't serious about libertarianism; what they really want is quiet conversation at the cocktail party; social signalling about how edgy they are.
    Mike is not interested in libertarianism; Mike is really serious about marketing and Mike's ability to post about Mike. 'Cause Mike is a really, really interesting guy, according to Mike. And if you don't believe that, why, ask Mike, right Mike?
    Fuck 'em, metaphorically. With a rusty chainsaw, metaphorically.

  391. Sevo   10 years ago

    "Christians have a concept called "witnessing". Basically, you try to treat everybody--including third parties--as if they're watching you and they're a potential convert.
    They took over the Roman Empire that way."

    I have a somewhat different opinion of the dynamic, but help yourself.

  392. CBear   10 years ago

    Mr Hihn,

    Seriously, what sort of argument do you believe you are making? You know, categorize it for me.

    Clearly, you're not making a legal argument since you're too bloody lazy to bother to inform yourself as to the state of jurisprudence of the First and BEST Amendment to the Supreme Law of the Land (not just an honorarium, actually a functioning hierarchy!).

    I'm pretty sure, based upon your signaling of what you believe to be online consensus (wherein you misquote a lawyer), that your tribe involves simple, mob rule.

    "My tribe" ain't your tribe.

    However, as St. Thomas said, 'the weakest argument is the argument from authority,' so, I won't 'go there' and dominate you.

    Since you spend so much time on the interwebs, allow me to give you an introduction to the secret society, the tribe(!), that wields dreadful licenses:

    Go to http://www.google.scholar.com. Select the restriction for federal courts. Enter into the search bar the federal statute at issue: Title 18 United States Code, Section 875(c).

    Since we no longer chain down the Bibles in the churches, you can actually read The Law too in its full glory!

    No doubt, once you read it, you will be left with all sorts of questions that induction (rather than deduction) demand.

    Indulge!

    Enjoy!

    Report back!

  393. jester   10 years ago

    You wouldn't have noticed because you're obviously a concerned libertarian and call it a flaw, many have before, but there is no filter on the comment section that limits this forum to libertarians only. It's true anarchy. It's your only chance of living in and feeling Somalia.

  394. Ken Shultz   10 years ago

    I think he's just become so filled with bitterness and spite for the libertarians here that he genuinely wants to believe that the rest of society will despise us as much as he does.

    I was saying to someone on another site recently that, you know, back in the day, before the internet and Hit & Run, I think libertarians just mostly talked to each other--and it was one way communication.

    You had your libertarian experts, and the rest of us were supposed to listen respectfully to what the experts had to say. I can see why people who cam up in that kind of libertarian environment might have a hard time dealing with the transition to more of a two-way communication world.

    But damn! They taught us to think for ourselves, and now some of them seem to resent the hell out of us because we think for ourselves. I suspect one of the things most of us libertarians have in common is that we're less susceptible to appeal to authority fallacy than non-libertarians.

    That must drive the old school libertarian "authorities" batty.

    It's a different world in a lot of ways. Before 1994, AOL, and Google, having a lot of knowledge was respected. Now my phone with Google is more knowledgeable than anyone in the room. It's just a different world now.

  395. AFSlade   10 years ago

    Ken & Sevo - I've been one of the lurkers for quite some time. Stumbled onto this place and got hooked on the comments. One of the nice things about lurking is figuring out (a) "who's who", and (b) what the equivalent of "Robert's Rules of Order" for commenting are (here, none. Which was nice to learn).

    Now, addressing one of Mister Hihn's huge fallacies in all of his rantings about being a leader in the LP, and at the vanguard, blah blah blah, it finally occurred to me that he keeps asserting without evidence that the poll numbers (the ones he misquotes and beats to death over and over again about the rejection of the libertarian "brand") as proof for his case as to how terrible you all are in your "dirty" commenting. All I can think is, "how does he know that it wouldn't be worse if you all (and Reason) weren't beating the drum the way you do?" In other words, where is the proof that "locker-room invective" is why the numbers are where they are (assuming their truth for a moment)?

    Maybe the real reason the numbers aren't where he would like them is because of him.

  396. AFSlade   10 years ago

    Mr. Hihn - you got any poll numbers of people rejecting the libertarian brand because of too much swearing? Or polls showing people find the crew here to have "excessive adherence to principles?" My guess is not.

    I think if the LP isn't where you think it should be - and you were at the vanguard and so crucial to its success, before everyone else - then maybe you could take a little fucking responsibility. That's what "leaders" do, not stand around berating others about why someone else is at fault. You can't claim to have been a leader, Mike, and then blame the "johnny come latelies" for why shit's fucked up.

    That's just logic fail 101 and shitty leadership. Sorry. I generally like to respect my elders, but you're all over the place on this one. And threatening to send letters to Reason's Board of Directors to get the discourse to where YOU think it should be marks you as a petty tyrant, no less vicious than the Preet Bhararas and Niketh Velamoors of the world.

  397. Sevo   10 years ago

    ALS,
    Both you and Ken presume Mike is sincere in his rejection of vulgar speech. You may be correct, but my take is different.
    I see Mike as nothing other than a worn-out 'authority' who is now trying desperately to regain some level of the social power he had when his views were considered au courant. He's hoping to trade on a controversy such that someone might take him seriously again; note his 'threat' to 'tell on us' above.
    Simply, he's a tired old fart with an over-inflated ego, hoping to find celebrity status again. And worthy of nothing other than derision.

  398. Sevo   10 years ago

    Ken Shultz|6.21.15 @ 12:53AM|#
    "I think he's just become so filled with bitterness and spite for the libertarians here that he genuinely wants to believe that the rest of society will despise us as much as he does."

    Qualified agreement.
    I do agree that he presumes to be 'the authority' and folks ignoring that pose might trigger some of his anger, but I'm pretty sure Mike is just a worn-out piece of crap hoping to gain some level of relevance again by playing 'scout master' to folks who might take him as seriously as his family does.

  399. gaoxiaen   10 years ago

    As good as the flamethrower bagpipe guy.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K-Op1Mng4oY

  400. Marshall Gill   10 years ago

    I'm defending against aggression

    So you really are as stupid as this judge. Verbal opinions expressed on the internet are not "aggression" no matter how many times you claim otherwise.

    If that were true, wouldn't all of your imbecility be aggression?

    "Shoots the messenger"? Dude, I can't call you a "messenger" because that would imply that your posts were lucid enough to contain a message. They are not.

    I am insulting an imbecile, nothing more, nothing less.

  401. Marshall Gill   10 years ago

    "Dementia" is a description of an elderly person who no longer has the full faculty of their minds. Your posts exemplify this.

    Are you saying that your posts are a result of your being a turd and NOT dementia? Unpossible.

  402. Red Rocks Rockin   10 years ago

    Hincontinent!

  403. kbolino   10 years ago

    So now you've been ridiculed too In response to your aggression. Any more questions?

    Do you know that the cake is a lie?

  404. Red Rocks Rockin   10 years ago

    Hihnsanity!

  405. johnl   10 years ago

    Michael, you are aware that your lament about kids these days ruining the republic or the movement republic or the movement is a very old gripe, older than Plato.

  406. Vincent Milburn   10 years ago

    You're really exaggerating the situation. Reason is only the ten-millionth website to have a coarse comments section. So what. Has YouTube's brand been tarnished?

    How many people are really following this story outside the libertarian community anyway?

  407. Red Rocks Rockin   10 years ago

    You need a safe space and a blankie, Hihn?

  408. DEATFBIRSECIA   10 years ago

    So let me see if I've got this right:

    Michael Hihn refrains from engaging in hyperbole which an opportunistic federal judge would find actionable, patiently doing so for decades, and the best he can do is get Robert Sarvis 6.5% of the vote in the Virgina governor's race, followed by 2.43% the next year when he ran for Virgina Senate. OK, that's better than Roger McBride's quarter percent presidential tally in 76, but still about the best the LP can do in any election cycle is "beat previous record [losing] percentages." Yawn.

    Six Reason commenters actually engage in hyperbolic, and apparently actionable speech, and draw some negative attention to themselves, and this website, yes, but then proceed to draw quite a bit of unfavorable attention to an out-of-control witch hunt the feds are engaging in, causing widespread debate, and giving a much-needed kick in the ass to folks who previously thought All Was Well.

    Michael, I'm going to have to go with Team Hyperbolic Speech, since they peeled back the AUSA's mask, while simultaneously uniting the commentariat here at Reason.

    But I wish you well, in your decades quest to eventually push the LP share up past 15%. Good Luck with that.

  409. Red Rocks Rockin   10 years ago

    Need a safe space and a blankie?

    "DOSE MEAN WORDS A BLOO BLOO BLOO!!"

  410. johnl   10 years ago

    Michael the rejection of the libertarian brand predates HnR.

  411. Red Rocks Rockin   10 years ago

    "MORE AGGRESSION! ON DUH INTERNETZ!!"

  412. crab_apple   10 years ago

    (laughing) Millions of Americans. It's really amazing how worked up about this you are. Have you ever read the comments at CNN, MSNBC, Salon, Fox News, etc.? Republicans and Democrats make far more blustering exaggerated comments than anything the commenters post on Reason.

    You're just a prude, a sad old angry prude.

  413. crab_apple   10 years ago

    You should be embarrassed about the broken links on your crappy website.

  414. crab_apple   10 years ago

    ANOTHER ONE!!!!11

    (snicker)

    Derp.

  415. Your English Teacher   10 years ago

    Michael, when I see such comments, I blow on by. I'm interested in what is germane, not what is inane.

  416. Old Man With Gag Order   10 years ago

    Did you read the six comments about chopping people into pieces?

    So fucking what? Are you too senile and delusional to know what the simple words "SHALL MAKE NO LAW" mean? Or is it a deep-seated authoritarianism peeping out from behind the demented mask?

  417. JPyrate   10 years ago

    Knock Knock Hinh. =D

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=je-M675ZTK4

  418. Pompey   10 years ago

    Reading comprehension much? Obviously not your fort?. Tedious old cunt.

  419. Pompey   10 years ago

    (walks away laughing)

    (walks away laughing)

    (walks away laughing)

    (walks away laughing)

    (walks away laughing)

    (walks away laughing)

    (snicker)

    (walks away laughing)

  420. lafe.long   10 years ago

    MORE bullshit (OMG) 59% of Americans self-define as libertarian, Cato survey. Only 9% of THEM identified as libertarian, which is ? tada ? a 91% rejection rate of the libertarian label by libertrarians.

    Please. Stop.

    First of all, (from your oft-linked Cato page) the Zogby poll was from 2006 - almost a decade ago.

    Secondly, the poll consisted of a total of 1,012 voters in the 2006 election. 91% of that would be ~920 people.

    920 individuals hardly constitutes "91% of ALL libertarians reject the brand OMGWTFBBQ1!1!".

    Also from the same Zogby poll:

    A robust 44 percent of respondents answered "yes" to that question, accepting a self-description as "libertarian."

    So please just stop... or perhaps commission your own poll to get better results to support your claim.

  421. kbolino   10 years ago

    It was a comment about the system in general, you mouthbreathing moron.

  422. kbolino   10 years ago

    I have a strong feeling that, if Michael Hihn could get the LP to be a major national party by throwing all the actual libertarians into camps, he wouldn't hesitate for one minute to load us into boxcars.

  423. JPyrate   10 years ago

    Hey Hinh .

    FUCK OFF =D

  424. lafe.long   10 years ago

    MORE bullshit (OMG) 59% of Americans self-define as libertarian, Cato survey. Only 9% of THEM identified as libertarian, which is ? tada ? a 91% rejection rate of the libertarian label by libertrarians.

    Please. Stop.

    First of all, (from your oft-linked Cato page) the Zogby poll was from 2006 - almost a decade ago.

    Secondly, the poll consisted of a total of 1,012 voters in the 2006 election. 91% of that would be ~920 people.

    920 individuals hardly constitutes "91% of ALL libertarians reject the brand OMGWTFBBQ1!1!".

    Also from the same Zogby poll:

    A robust 44 percent of respondents answered "yes" to that question, accepting a self-description as "libertarian."

    So please just stop... or perhaps commission your own poll to get better results to support your claim.

  425. Sevo   10 years ago

    Mike,
    I'm quite certain it's tough accepting that you're a tire old piece of shit with no relevance, but the way to deal with that is NOT simply claiming you have relevance.
    Now, once again, do you contract with Allied Van Lines to move the ego around YOU STUPID PILE OF SHIT?

  426. Sevo   10 years ago

    "Is free speech the main issue here, or the public humiliation of libertarianism to millions of Americans."

    From that comment, the obvious main issue here is the stupidity of Mike.
    Fuck off, asshole. You're tiresome.

  427. jester   10 years ago

    If you give up your libertarian ideals to become an ideal libertarian, are you still a libertarian?

  428. jester   10 years ago

    You, sir, have just abetted violence. (Of course, your speech is hyperbole, right?)

  429. jester   10 years ago

    Libertarians are not tolerant of depriving persons of their innate freedom. So yes they are intolerant.

  430. DesigNate   10 years ago

    Why the hell should you tolerate a socialist?

    What kind of libertarian are you?

  431. lafe.long   10 years ago

    MORE bullshit (OMG) 59% of Americans self-define as libertarian, Cato survey. Only 9% of THEM identified as libertarian, which is ? tada ? a 91% rejection rate of the libertarian label by libertrarians.

    Please. Stop.

    First of all, (from your oft-linked Cato page) the Zogby poll was from 2006 - almost a decade ago.

    Secondly, the poll consisted of a total of 1,012 voters in the 2006 election. 91% of that would be ~920 people.

    920 individuals hardly constitutes "91% of ALL libertarians reject the brand OMGWTFBBQ1!1!".

    Also from the same Zogby poll:

    A robust 44 percent of respondents answered "yes" to that question, accepting a self-description as "libertarian."

    So please just stop... or perhaps commission your own poll to get better results to support your claim.

  432. DesigNate   10 years ago

    Michael Hihn|6.21.15 @ 1:33PM|#

    Bronwyn
    Boy, the squirrels nailed you, HARD

    And she had multiple orgasms!

    But everyone else is just a juvenile delinquent, shitting all over libertarianism and making it unpalatable to the masses.

    Jesus man.

  433. DesigNate   10 years ago

    This word "agression", I don't think it means what you think it means.

  434. anon   10 years ago

    If 91% have your reading comprehension skills, Mike, I'm god-damned proud to be one of the 9%. Fuck, better than 8%.

    Despite the fact that the numbers you're using to arrive at your conclusion are so outdated and contorted that it's a fucking joke. Go fuck yourself in a woodchipper.

  435. anon   10 years ago

    It's inactive. An archive from over ten years ago ...

    AHAHAHAHAHHA HAHAHHA Get fucking real. You use data that you admit yourself is old and outdated to spout nonsense. Seriously, fuck off and die.

  436. bacon-magic   10 years ago

    HIHN and AmSo sitting in a tree...
    w- o- o- d- c- h- i- p! ???
    (still works even with the extra letter)

  437. bacon-magic   10 years ago

    Heiny, you are a piece of garbage. I bet you haven't bathed for days and are currently picking your nose while the orderly is bringing your bologna sandwich with a mustard smiley face. Save this for your proof tattle tale.

  438. bacon-magic   10 years ago

    I'm pretty sure he's autistic and in a mental ward somewhere. Heiny, go take the long NAP that you've earned. Yes, I do mean a dirt nap you retarded shit stained fuck.

  439. FuriousFatMan   10 years ago

    because Reason never knows when their evil goons will be stacked up in the government and will want access to all of us libertarians that remain consistent when the Koch brothers try to take over the internet again.

    *hat tip*

    -FFM

  440. gabeh73   10 years ago

    Most other people really don't even read anything but Kris Jenner and Kanye West rumors....Libertarians read the article that is so "embarassing". I hadn't been to reason for years...only came back this month because of this article and wanting to engage in hyperbolic I'm sparticus speech.

    When I read about Valdemoor in Harry Potter I really really wished I could have placed him in a woodchipper...the herry potter guy....not the asshole legal assistant.

  441. gabeh73   10 years ago

    for all you know Obama is lying about his place of birth...would you really be surprised? he lied about ending torture....why not lie about his birth?

  442. Bruce D   10 years ago

    Dude, you're over-reacting. The average person who would read the woodchipper comments and the comments about Forrest deserving to die are not going to be too upset about it. Anyone who has any chance at all of ever becoming libertarian would either sympathize with the comments or recognizes the humour and sarcasm, as well as the rightful outrage contained within.

    Sometimes we have to call out the enemies of freedom such as cunt Forrest. Anyone outraged about calling such worthless piece of shit Forrest a cunt would never be a libertarian.

  443. lafe.long   10 years ago

    *chuckles*

    Lies, damned lies, and statistics.

    Pollsters call every voter? (OMG) Ever see the term "margin of error?" Pollsters use a "representative sample." Then calculate ... it's also called "degree of confidence" if you're still confused.

    Yeah, I know how polls work... however in your constant railing on the topic, you always seem to claim that 91% of ALL libertarians "reject the brand" without citing sample size. This is disingenuous at least, and mendacious at best. If you honestly believe that a select sample of 920 respondents from 10 years ago represents how ALL libertarians feel today, I don't know what to tell you.

    I notice you never address the fact that this is a decade old poll specific to voters in a 2006 election. The poll is so old, the graphics are all broken/gone on the page.

    Is it "robust" to lose 25% by adding "libertarian" to the Nolan definition? You intentionally doctored the sentence ...

    *shrugs* Cato seems to think it's "robust" enough to mention.
    How is copying and pasting a complete sentence from your source considered "doctoring"?

  444. lafe.long   10 years ago

    Also please note (non-doctored quote from the page):

    We also asked a new question. We asked half the sample, "Would you describe yourself as fiscally conservative and socially liberal?" We asked the other half of the respondents, "Would you describe yourself as fiscally conservative and socially liberal, also known as libertarian?"

    ... so it would seem that your (already small) sample size dwindles even more.

    (My snarky response to aggression)

    "aggression"? Really?!? My response is the most civil and non-aggressive that you're likely to get here.

    *rolls my fucking eyes*

  445. JPyrate   10 years ago

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wgMPJU6wSF0

  446. Vincent Milburn   10 years ago

    Rand Paul is a serious candidate in a formal setting. I'm sure if anyone from this comment section was running for office, they would not say the same things they say on an internet comments section.

  447. Red Rocks Rockin   10 years ago

    Hihnconsequential!

    as Mike walks away

    ::posts yet another diarrhetic comment with randomly bolded phrases::

  448. Zunalter   10 years ago

    "blowhard stupidity of Reason's libertarian comments peanut gallery."

    Do you get paid every time you use that phrase or something? Perhaps an SEO thing? If so, congrats on raking it in...

  449. Zunalter   10 years ago

    "blowhard stupidity of Reason's libertarian comment peanut gallery"

    Seriously, this is like 30 times I have read that phrase from you...early onset Alzheimer's?

  450. dinkster   10 years ago

    So where do you keep your "he was mean to me" list?

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