Chris Christie

Chris Christie: I'd Crack Down on Legal Weed in Colorado, Washington as President

Ya big bully


Chris Christie

As if anyone needed another reason to dislike New Jersey, the state's governor, Chris Christie,  a likely Republican presidential candidate, just said if he were president he'd crack down on legalized marijuana. On the Hugh Hewitt Show, Christie was asked if he'd enforce the drug laws in Colorado and Washington, which Hewitt said were "flaunting federal law by allowing people to sell dope legally." Christie said he'd "crack down and not permit it." Hewitt was ready to move on but Christie had more to say:

HH: All right, next…

CC: Marijuana is a gateway drug. We have an enormous addiction problem in this country. And we need to send very clear leadership from the White House on down through the federal law enforcement. Marijuana is an illegal drug under federal law. And the states should not be permitted to sell it and profit from it.

Christie, a former prosecutor, may not exactly be about enforcing all the laws when it comes to marijuana, his rhetoric on Hewitt's show notwithstanding. The legislation legalizing medical marijuana went into effect in 2010, but the governor has been notoriously slow about implementing the law. He worries about medical marijuana dispensaries' "profit motive". The first one didn't open until 2012. New Jersey being New Jersey, the state's medical marijuana regulations are some of the largest in the country.

When he was first elected, Christie was hailed by Republicans looking for a post-2008 hero as the kind of Republican that can win in blue states like New Jersey. His two terms have showed what that looks like—a candidate with the worst nanny state tendencies of both major parties. 

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  1. kind of Republican that can win in blue states like New Jersey. His two terms have showed what that looks like?a candidate with the worst nanny state tendencies of both major parties.

    Libertarian Moment!

    1. I think they meant post-2008 hero sandwich. Instead of courting the dinosaur wing of Team Red, he should just crawl into a (very large) hole and die.

  2. “flaunting federal law”

    Can he be flogged for flaunting his flouting of meaning?

    1. Yes! It’s a fragrant volition of English!

      1. He should be flensed and rendered for that remark.

    2. Woohoo! Look at me wave a federal law around! Woohoo!

  3. Slogan for Chris Christie: Somehow Worse than Jeb Bush

    1. You Know Who Else…

      1. Joseph Bruce Ismay?

      2. Newt Gingrich?

    2. “Slogan for Chris Christie: Somehow Worse than Jeb Bush”

      Or, I might be better than Shillery?

      1. “You couldn’t fit a playing card between Hillary and My Policies”

        1. “…and if you tried, it would get all greasy.”

          1. bacon? I like bacon.

      2. If forced to vote for either Hillary or that tub of goo I would pick Hillary. I’m afraid he would eat all the orphans in DC and then come for the Meitiv children.

        Free range tastes best.

        1. ++++++ ad infinitum

  4. CC: Marijuana is a gateway drug.

    Well, it has been shown to cause delusions in the minds of drug warriors.

    1. I HATE the idiotic reference to pot as a gateway drug. People who like to ingest mind-altering substances usually ingest a variety of them. Calling pot gateway implies that it’s less intimidating because it’s less harmful than say, heroine or whisky. Which is a great argument for making it legal.

  5. My gawd, what a fucking fat loser. You didn’t really have to prove it, fat boy.

    1. Christie’s problem is that he’s too much of an economic fascist to win as a Republican and too much of a social fascist to win as a Democrat.

      Bloomberg was able to do it at a local level, but you can’t play that game nationally.

      1. too much of a social fascist to win as a Democrat.

        On pot basically. The Dems seem perfectly willing to outlaw things.

        1. Yeah, I think Christie could switch parties and I’m not sure anyone would notice.

      2. Anyone who could possibly get enough people to vote for them in NJ to become governor is automatically the worst possible human being imaginable.

        That being said, I’d like to see fat fuck loser try to ‘crack down’ on legal cannabis. Not sure if there’s a gallows strong enough to hoist him up on, but it would be interesting to find out..

        1. I’m sure there’s a crane.

        2. We could find one. Maybe if we built it out of hemp it’d be stronger.

  6. So who should be Reason’s singing mascot: Gertrude Michael or Cab Calloway?

      1. Pshaw they sang about pot when it was legal…

    1. Oh, Cab Calloway, never a doubt. He was stilling swinging and hoofing with the Blues Bros.

  7. It is obvious that Christie does not have any addiction issues; he never overdoes it.

    What is with this fat fuck or that degenerate gambling twat Bill Bennett deciding which vices are acceptable?

    1. The only thing stopping the bitch from overdosing on fries and milkshakes is a fucking stomach rebuilt to be smaller. You can’t put ten burgers in a single burger tummy.

        1. Come on, Chris! Try for the record!

      1. He has managed to put 20 pounds of monkey shit into his head, which is a 5 pound space.

  8. Obviously Christie is afraid that, were pot legal, his munchies would overwhelm his lap band.

    1. Obama’s cock must be really fattening.

      1. I have a present for you. It may or may not be a small container’s worth of vomit. But it’s yours, and I’d like to post it posthaste. Let me know where it belongs, please. xoxoxo

      2. Must be a genetic thing. Most of the other heavy fellaters haven’t ballooned like ole El Gordo.

    2. Hey, it’s a real danger!!!

    3. It appears that it’s already too late for that…

  9. Luckily the fatass is never going to be president, so he can blow it out his (fat) ass.

    I’m still trying to figure out, as legalization gathers more and more momentum, why idiots like him think this is a winning tack. I mean, when CNN has been doing specials with Sanjay Gupta that have basically excoriated the feds for keeping MJ Schedule 1 and all but come out for legalization, even if they’re more concerned with being able to do research on its potential medical uses, you know prohibition is falling out of favor. Yet the fatass thinks returning to 80s pot rhetoric is the way to go.

    1. Clearly McDonald’s rots the brain and should be a schedule 1 drug.

      I also maintain it is a gateway drug. You start with a double cheeseburger and pretty soon you’re injecting straight bacon grease into your arm through an intravenous line.

      1. Not bacon grease. Beef tallow.

        (Man I miss back when they still made their fries in beef tallow.)

        1. Supposedly the tastiest fries are cooked in horse fat, but it’s hard to get in the US.

          1. You have to render your own horse.

        2. It used to be worth swinging through McDs just to pick up an order of those fries.


      Shut up and call him Big Pop-pa, Epi. You know he loves when you do that.

      1. Just like your dad!

      2. I think Christie is a little too fat to wear a Judge uniform.

    3. He is obviously a forward thinking person. I heard he was really into Crystal Pepsi.

      1. I heard Crystal *and* Bambi Amber. But that was before he got married.

        1. Vicki St. Elmo?

    4. I’m still trying to figure out, as legalization gathers more and more momentum, why idiots like him think this is a winning tack

      It got Bloomberg got re-elected.

      1. It got Bloomberg re-elected in a locale where there are different laws, in practice, for the elite and everyone else. If you’re an elite A-Lister, you can get any drugs you want, whenever you want them and nobody lifts a finger — just ask Phillip Seymour Hoffman or Heath Ledger (use your Ouija board) — but if you’re a poor black man, they will choke the life out of you.

  10. Just another fat bastard.

    1. At least he’s not Scottish.

  11. He worries about profit motive, yet ignores the lucrative business that outlawed drugs have become. Also the war on drugs is a giant failure, but it’s ok because of the profit motive of special interests engaged in protracted conflict. They get fancy weapons, new jails to house folks locked up for smoking grass, along with task forces that can raid people’s houses because PCFYTW!!!

    His eating vice is ok, because insurance companies are unable to tailor insurance based on the individual and their health risk, is costing folks that are healthy money because it’s not fair to judge his morbid obesity so they must subsidize it.

    Dear leader tells you what to like and what not to.

  12. Question: will anti-smoking bylaws include pot?

    1. Only if you are smoking pot out of something that looks like a cigarette – that is all that matters.

    2. You can count on it.

      1. Interesting scenario: pot will be legal but it will be illegal to smoke it anywhere!

        1. I’m already in an interesting scenario, at least by old hippie standards: I live in a city where I’m more likely to smell pot smoke than tobacco smoke.

          1. It’s Boulder, isn’t it.

            1. Your powers of deduction astound me.

          2. Given all that’s known regarding the extreme health compromises inherent with sustained(addictive)tobacco use, I’ve come to regard any users as authentically and undeniably suffering clinical mental illness of some form or another.

  13. Morbidly-obese food addicts get Lap-Band surgery and cheers and drug addicts get prison and felonies? This malodorous shit barge would projectile crap a mile of pastrami sandwiches and rail against the universe if federal law made Big Gulps illegal because of the goddamn fat asses and their addiction to sugar (a law which would also be mind-fumblingly stupid). It figures that a real nitwit trophy is governor of the state most overrun by humans.

  14. The Governor of Joisey doesn’t want pot legalized.

    By some strange coincidence, neither does the Mob. Go figure.

  15. If you look at the early polls, Christie is the only guy with major name recognition and low poll numbers.

    What Republicans already know about him they don’t like, and/or the more they get to know him, the less they like him.

    Also, does anybody else remember Christie shilling for Obama six days before the last election in a clear case of tit for tat–obviously trying to hit up Obama for some cash after Hurricane Sandy?

    We should refresh the Republican primary voters’ memory.

    Christie sold the GOP short when it mattered.

    F Christie.

    1. Don’t worry. He so fat he fell down to the third tier or Republican candidates.

    2. So why do you care about the GOP?

      Oh, silly me! You are the GOP!


        1. Imagonna start referring to him as StrawPlug or ButtStraw.

      2. I care about the GOP mostly because Rand Paul is running for their nomination.

        I also care about the GOP, to a certain extent, because even some of their lesser candidates are better than Hillary–and certainly better than progressives like Warren.

    3. “If you look at the early polls, Christie is the only guy with major name recognition and low poll numbers.”

      Winning combo, right there. ‘We know you and we can’t stand you’. The turd or Bo of the GOP candidates.

      1. That’s exactly what the polls are saying…

        According to Republican primary voters, a little bit of Christie goes a long way.

        1. Or a lot of Christie doesn’t go very far at all.

          1. +1 more engine on Air Force One

    4. Ken- socon mouthpieces, journos, and yapping heads love the guy. If you roll a set of stubby fingers into a tight ball, brandish it madly, and roar at unions and msm flunkies while governing a huge pile of humans the Republican establishment wants nothing more than to pull that fucking zipper down and drown their brains in your cum.

      1. Too Coherent to be Agile Cyborg.

        1. Naah, just a bit early.

      2. Ken did exactly that on Chaturbate for Conservatives.

        1. What the hell are you talkin’ about?

  16. When will we get “The libertarian case for Chris Christie.” Fat, fucking POS.

    1. Well we got two for Obama…

  17. So the question I have is: WIH did he bother to make such a statement? Is he appealing to some audience who he thinks is big enough to put him over the top?
    Is it simply the so-cons he’s hoping to get? If so, why hasn’t he jumped on a jesus bandwagon by now?

    1. To me, this isn’t that hard. He’s literally right next door to Bloomberg country.

    2. In one of the crappiest parts of the East Coast, some (most?) will only get joy when they see things denied/taken away from others. Maybe he is pandering to that demographic.
      “There outta be a law.”
      “They should ban that.”

  18. Fuck that fat fucking fuck. He rivals Santorum for the worst Repub candidate.

    1. He rivals Santorum for the worst Repub candidate

      That implies there is such a thing as a “good” Republican candidate.

      1. Ron, Rand, Justin, and Gary. Zombie Goldwater.

        1. Suellington,
          You’re in the same boat as me. You could vote 20 or 30 times, and it wouldn’t make a lick of difference.
          So I’ll vote on tax issues and prolly a Lib’t’n candidate for the record, but the Chron the next morning will report the same thing it always has: “D’s sweep CA!”.

          1. “D’s swipe CA!”.

            Would be more accurate.

            But don’t worry President Clinton 1B will use the fed to bail out CA in the next crunch.

          2. We live in occupied territory indeed sevo.

      2. At this point, 2016 is looking to be another ‘who disgusts me least’ year.

        I wonder if they will be handing out barf bags with the ballots?

        1. I’m telling you, everyone’s yelling “Hillary is TOAST!” just like they were about Obama. You wait and watch, the Democrats will line the fuck up behind her. And they’ll be enthusiastic about it.

          1. Paul — You couldn’t be more correct. Hillary is going to coast into the White House and the reason is because the majority of the American people are STUPID!

            25% of Americans couldn’t tell you who the vice-president is.

            50% couldn’t tell you who the secretary of state is.

            75% couldn’t tell you who the speaker of the house is.


        2. Just print them on barf bags.

  19. On the Hugh Hewitt Show,

    Can’t seem to find except for Chaturbate.

  20. As if anyone needed another reason to dislike New Jersey…


    1. I agree. One more reason is unnecessary.

  21. I GOT it!
    I presume everyone here is getting the Shrillery campaign adds with that entirely cold logo. Well, I thought it looked like either a service delivery business or perhaps a moving company, but look here:…..ORM=IQFRBA

    1. This is better. I just wish the original Photoshopper had cropped and scaled them better.

    2. I believe the arrow is Bill Clinton’s penis about to enter Monica Lewinski’s orifice.

  22. Is this Agile Cyborg’s grandfather?

    1. Jesus, winston. You have a thing of making the same joke 10 over and over until it seems to be a form of abuse.

      1. It’s true, Winston. You need new material.

  23. That phat cunt apparently can’t read a poll, and for that reason and several others won’t be president. He hasn’t done anything worth noting anytime recently either.

    1. I think he can read a poll.

      I would see his planning this way:
      1) Pander to the socons to get the nomination.
      2) Count on the anti-Hillary backlash to win in November. Those for whom legal pot is a deciding issue will break libertarian rather than Team Blue, those for whom it isn’t will be pissed off about their Obamacare penaltax and vote Team Red.

      1. Or maybe he’s sincere…? It does happen, even to politicians. Humans aren’t always logical or consistent, and don’t always act in their own best interests.

  24. Yeah and I have to live there.

  25. There’s no way he’s running. What’s he really doing?

    This gives me thinky-face.

  26. It really baffles me how these GOP guys are rolling.

    Each of them (w/ exceptions) seems to be *going out of their way* to make grand statements about issues where they gain zero political benefit and look like enormous douchebags to boot.

    Its like the *exact opposite* of what you’re supposed to do as a politician. Like ‘George Castanza’ opposite.

    Like Bush, saying “I would have kept Terri Schiavo on the plug”

    The terri schiavo case was one of the lowest points for republicans in the last 2 decades. It was embarrassing. Even pro life people thought it hurt their cause. all he’d fucking have to do is dodge the issue. But no. He has to *lead* with that culture-war shit, like anyone cares.

    And Christie? Anti-Weed? WTF. Has he seen the charts showing most people supporting legal pot? and the trend? christ. what a fucking moron.

    Cruz, i can understand leading with “I’m the candidate with the most Jesus”. Its still stupid! but i get it.

    All we need now is Rubio to declare war on Iran. Just get it over with.

    I hope the thing comes down to walker/rand anyway. The rest are just losers

    1. I’ve been pondering whether Christie could drag Rand into this conversation, toss off a couple crack-arsed comments and jet like Gore to an island conference buffet. Thus leaving Rand holding the bag.

      I doubt he could pull that off. Nah. Still thinking.

    2. It is a bit odd. Bad advice from campaign consultants? It seems to me that GOP socons would not run from a nominee with libertarianish views on pot and Schiavo, not if the alternative was Hillary Clinton. A limited government/fiscal responsibility platform should be more than enough to appeal to them. And I think a large number of independents and even Democrats could be won over with a “get the government out of your private business” message.

      1. ” A limited government/fiscal responsibility platform should be more than enough to appeal to them.”

        exactly my point. they don’t need this socon bullshit to win GOP voters. it aint that kind of year.

        what they *should* be doing is appealing to women and talking about ‘economic security’. (i.e. people on the verge of retirement). Obama won in 2008 partly because he wasn’t the idiot mccain scrambling around without a message. if the market has even a small correction in the next 18months, the whole “woman” thing could be a liability for Hillary.

        they’re just too fucking stupid to believe

        1. I have actually considered writing something like “A Libertarian Tells the GOP How to Win in 2016” and sending it to a bunch of campaigns. I have an unusual perspective, but I think an insightful one. I know the Silicon Valley/Berkeley political mindsets. The social issues are a killer. You simply can’t be against gay marriage or abortion. On the other hand, a strong “do your own thing” message applied to government taxes and regulation could have appeal. A Reagan-esque “simplify and streamline the government” message could make inroads. Local foods, alternative and experimental medicine, etc. A Tea Party message in a positive framework: new technology, innovation, local freedom, and experiments. (It’s science, you smug leftists who always attack the GOP for not being “scientific” enough.)

          1. Please do. Repubs also need the message that a portion of our defense spending is foreign aid. Europe should be picking up much more of its defense bills. Time to cut them off.

            1. Yes. Cutting military foreign aid can appeal to right, left, and libertarian. Our allies can afford it.

              1. “Cutting military foreign aid can appeal to right, left, and libertarian”

                You’ve lived in California too long.

                To win elections, you need to talk tough but *qualify it*. in the GOP, how you qualify your tough-talk says a lot. its subtle stuff. the word “cutting” is not even breathed during election years. “reducing America’s profile” maybe. but none of this “cut” shit.

                there’s a couple million people in the defense contracting businesses. they vote

                1. In more than a few states defense contracts account for large numbers of good paying jobs.

                2. Well, I’m suggesting a political strategy. It’s not in final, polished form. So yeah, make it more subtle.

                  1. Papaya, are you aware of what position Christie is running for? He is running for GOP nominee.

    3. If we’re trying to figure out why Christie would go full retard against marijuana, I see two primary motivations:

      1) He’s really in it to maintain his support in blue state New Jersey, and banning marijuana is popular with crossover progressives there–like banning Big Gulps.

      2) He’s trying to appeal to Republican donors by making like a cultural conservative.

      As a GOP guy in a blue state, he knows his days are numbered. What he mostly has to offer the GOP is support in the northeast as a vice-presidential running mate on the GOP ticket.

      He might make a good vice presidential candidate for somebody–but it would have to be somebody that isn’t afraid of being overshadowed by him in the media. You get a media darling like Christie on the ticket, and it may do to his running mate what Palin did to McCain. With Christie on the ticket, who’s gonna care what Jeb Bush has to say?

      1. “He’s really in it to maintain his support in blue state New Jersey, and banning marijuana is popular with crossover progressives there”

        right idea, maybe, but wrong group.

        If he’s pandering to anyone, its the cop unions who’d be out of a fucking job. Cop unions are big in NJ.

        i think there’s zero hope of NJ fatty trying to out-Red Cruz et al. he can’t even offer his own State as an asset the way Jeb/Rubio can. he had a brief moment a few years back where he appealed to people, but he’s since gotten pushed to the rear. His best pitch would be ‘national electability’, but even that’s sort of a laugh when he’s competing against Queen Team Blue

      2. A Bush/Christie ticket? I feel nauseated.

  27. Your fat ass is too lazy to crack down on anything other than a non-reinforced chair.

    1. I’ll give that an 8.2

      not richter scale, but Olympic-judge-style score.

  28. OT:

    A disgraced ex-police officer testifying against his drug squad colleagues acknowledged Tuesday that he stole drug money, planted evidence and lied on police paperwork too many times to count.

    And they targeted victims by race! Prepare for the widespread public outrage!

    Jeffrey Walker told jurors that the Philadelphia Police Department drug squad targeted white “college-boy … khaki-pants types” who were “easy to intimidate.”

    Oops, never mind! Plus, Walker is black so we know he can’t be a racist. Cancel the outrage.

    1. Lacks the proper formula for public outrage.

  29. It needs to be said: fuck you, Christie, you fat fascist fuck.


    1. I’m listening to the full Hewitt interview and I’m floored that someone could call themselves a conservative and propose such specifically statist views, from taxation to drug enforcement to foreign policy, and pretend to be a Reagan clone.

      I don’t understand how someone in his position is this stupid.

      1. The machine must have malfunctioned pumping a few hundred bodies and no brain into one really messed up clone.

      2. He is pretty much a Reagan clone on drug enforcement, though possibly less harsh. I mean Christ, Reagan not only encouraged laws which called for giving drug dealers the death penalty, he introduced alcohol prohibition.

        Plus, Reagan certainly didn’t run as a liberterian. He was hand in hand with Jerry Falwell and was supporting a whole raft of stuff like prayer in schools (which he thankfully dropped once he got in office and focused on the economy.)

      3. What? He wants to “conserve” the status quo, and the status quo is “drug war yesterday, drug war today, drug war forever.”

  30. Eh, piss off, Fatso.

  31. So how’s that crack down on drugs been going so far?

    People want to smoke marijuana, and they ought o be able to do that without potentially being criminals.

    I reckon we ought to outlaw politicians, and eject then into outer-space, so the rest of us sensible humans can get on with living our lives as we fucking well see fit.

      1. For Christie we’ll need a Saturn VI or maybe even a Saturn VII.

  32. Bunch of early risers this morning.

  33. Given the way he dealt with the teachers’ unions, I was hoping for better than this. Silly of me to extrapolate based on a single issue, of course.

  34. Big shock..he’s an asshole, whodathunkit?

  35. This just goes to show that Christie cares frak all for federalism or states’ rights. Some “conservative”.

  36. Start making cash right now… Get more time with your family by doing jobs that only require for you to have a computer and an internet access and you can have that at your home. Start bringing up to$8897 a month. I’ve started this job and I’ve never been happier and now I am sharing it with you, so you can try it too. You can check it out here…
    This is where to start??????????

  37. Chris Christie is a perfect candidate for God’s Own Party to lose with. The mystical fanaticism that has since 1924 seeped over from the Prohibition Party (still a thing) has lately caused republicans to lose to a repealer, a Catholic, a hick, a wimp, a skin flute and a brown person. Why not let a girl kick sand in their faces too?

    Sure I’ll miss them, like I miss the Whig and National Socialist parties, but sacrifices have to be made. Ask any Republican.

  38. Well, so far he’s the worst candidate for the job now… which is where Santorum was last election cycle. Rand and Ted suddenly look a lot better.

  39. Someone needs to get this tubby high and give him a Costco-sized bag of Cheetos. Best case scenario he realizes he won’t be compelled to run down to a Newark corner and jab a dirty needle in his neck. Worst case scenario at least his mouth will be full so he can’t talk and we’ll be able to track his movements easily by the cheetum-prints he leaves behind.

  40. It’s not only assholish, it’s politically stupid.

    A) I don’t think this is the most motivating issue for the base. I do not see hordes of social-cons out there up in arms about legal weed, do you?

    B) He’s on the wrong side of the general electorate according to polls.

    Just who does Christie think he’s appealing to?

    1. Sheldon Adelson?…..-campaign/

  41. Christie is the worst kind of politician. Too many reasons to list.

  42. I get paid over $87 per hour working from home with 2 kids at home. I never thought I’d be able to do it but my best friend earns over 10k a month doing this and she convinced me to try. The potential with this is endless. Heres what I’ve been doing,


  43. A gateway drug? It’s nice to see the governor is up on the times — quoting lines from “Dragnet”, that is.

  44. Christie show why many Libertarians like me refuse to vote for Republicans. He is as bad a nanny-stater as anybody from Bloomberg Town across the river.

  45. Because freedoms, liberties, and rights are bad, unless you’re at an all you can eat buffet, right ?#?ChrisChristie??

  46. Because freedoms, liberties, and rights are bad, unless you’re at an all you can eat buffet, right ?#?ChrisChristie??

  47. Google pay 97$ per hour my last pay check was $8500 working 1o hours a week online. My younger brother friend has been averaging 12k for months now and he works about 22 hours a week. I cant believe how easy it was once I tried it out.
    This is wha- I do…… ??????

  48. tub of lard

  49. Christie just wants to get rid of anything that makes him hungry. He thinks that removing the temptation of pot will help him lose another 200 pounds.


    Is it possible to insert a lap band around his neck?

  50. I do find it interesting that as the government gets tougher and more unreasonable in the laws that it makes and enforces that it is creating a backlash against the very oppression it seeks to implement.

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