Scandal-Plagued Aaron Schock Resigns from Congress

Few crooks unmask themselves in such dramatic fashion.


Aaron Schock
Aaron Schock / Instagram

Rep. Aaron Schock will resign his seat in the House of Representatives, according to POLITICO. His statement:

"Today, I am announcing my resignation as a Member of the United States House of Representatives effective March 31," Schock said in a statement. "I do this with a heavy heart. Serving the people of the 18th District is the highest and greatest honor I have had in my life. I thank them for their faith in electing me and letting me represent their interests in Washington. I have given them my all over the last six years. I have traveled to all corners of the District to meet with the people I've been fortunate to be able to call my friends and neighbors."

"But the constant questions over the last six weeks have proven a great distraction that has made it too difficult for me to serve the people of the 18th District with the high standards that they deserve and which I have set for myself. I have always sought to do what's best for my constituents and I thank them for the opportunity to serve," he said in a statement.

It's a remarkably swift fall from grace for the youngest member of Congress, whose status as an adventurous, fit, fashionable next-gen Republican collapsed over the last few months amidst revelation after revelation about his profligate spending habits and megalomania. He redecorated his office to resemble Downton Abbey, brought a photographer with him everywhere he went, took staffers to a Katy Perry concert, and billed the American people for expensive hotels, airfare, and sporting events—raising the possibility of ethics and spending violations. National Review's Charles C.W. Cooke has called him, plainly, "a crook."

Washington, D.C. is full of such crooks, of course. But few do the American people the service of exposing themselves in such dramatic fashion—via incessant public displays of borderline sociopathic narcissism.

The mere fact that an elected representative could debase himself in so much corruption so quickly, however, isn't much of a shock (heh).

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  1. Now I’ve lost my bet that he’d be the first openly gay R in congress.

    1. Lindsey Graham hasn’t come out yet?

      1. His closet has a closet.

      2. If he ever does, it will be without a penis. And he won’t even have to change his name.

    2. 1994 – Steve Gunderson – Wisconsin

  2. The mere fact that an elected representative could debase himself in so much corruption so quickly, however, isn’t much of a shock (heh).

    It just shows how prone he was to errin’.

      1. Or, perhaps, Erin go Braugh?

  3. He redecorated his office to resemble Downtown Abbey

    he needed a place to go when he was alone and life was making him lonely

    1. My office would be the bridge of the Enterprise, and you lot would pay for it!

  4. I would imagine there is something far worse lurking in the rafters that he hopes resigning will make “old news.”

    1. Charlie: That’s true. They do have “niggers” hanging from “rafters”.
      The Waitress: (overhearing Charlie) Coffee, Hitler? I’ll be sure to put lots of cream in that for you.
      Charlie: No, I’m not Adolf Hitler.

  5. Downtown Abbey, Robby.

    1. This would indicate that Robby does not watch said show, which makes me hold him in higher esteem.

      Also, prolly not gay – NTTAWWT

      1. I hope the Dowager Countess pummels you.

        1. I don’t know who that is, and I’m calling you gay right now.


            2. So she’s the new Bea Arthur, and you’re the new Johnny Longtorso – good to know.

              1. It’s just a soap opera, but I like how down trodden the underclass is.

                1. I managed to watch half an episode with my wife before I threw a brick through the TV and had to get a mainline injection of NASCAR and Ron White

                  1. Mainline injection? Does that mean you suck Ron Whites cock while watching NASCAR? Or does it mean anal…

    2. Thanks. Indeed, this is one of the only popular TV shows I do not watch and have never seen.

      1. Just promise to catch up on Broad City and all will be forgiven.

        1. What’s Broad City? is it a show about 9 De Julio Avenue?

        2. I don’t know anything about Broad City, except that Salon has been reviewing it favorably.

          1. It’s funny as hell. Abbi and Ilana are…insane. In the best possible way.

            1. “I have 3–maybe 3 and a half–servings left in me.”

              1. “It’s 2014, anal is on the menu.”

                “I think I just got hate-crimed.”

          2. As long as you watch Archer nothing else matters.

            1. As long as you watch Archer nothing else matters.

              Not so much this season – the Archer writers have become more crass and it’s less funny. Double-entendre == funny. Single-entendre == not funny.

              1. So, IYO, [Blatant double-entendre] isn’t funny, but [blatant double-entendre], “Phrasing!” (X5) is sublimely subtle?

                The very existence of Mr. Bearjangles proves your full of shit.

          3. except that Salon has been reviewing it favorably.

            That’s troubling. Anything funny usually goes right over their pointy little heads.

            1. It’s because it’s two chicks. That the show is funny as hell is incidental and beyond their ken.

          4. I don’t know anything about Broad City, except that Salon has been reviewing it favorably

            Thanks for the warning Robby. I’ll be sure to not watch that now.

    3. Aw, man, did he have there as Downtown Abbey? Well, that ruins the joke I was going to make.

  6. This article was written just for the Schock value.

    1. Aaron on the side of caution.

      1. Would you like to upgrade to a Grande?

        1. Oh yes. She’s adorable.

          1. Her new video is fun to watch with the sound off. The camera just follows her ass up a bunch of flights of stairs for the 2nd half.

            1. I can’t think of a better use of their time.

  7. Tar and feathers. Also this:

    He redecorated his office to resemble Downtown Abbey,

    I think I hear a voice crying for help from the recesses of a tiny cupboard.

  8. I am Schocked – SCHOCKED – to find that open thievery is going on in here!

    1. Your winnings, sir.

    1. Schock has explained that “exercising humility is important to” him; that he hopes not only to “stand for [his] principles but . . . to work for them”; and that his conservative and Christian upbringing has informed his political outlook.

      He definitely was a throwback to a better time.

  9. Politico revealed, moreover, that Schock had charged the American public $3,000 for “software on Nov. 14,” but that the expenditure was in fact “part of the cost of flying in a software executive’s private plane…”

    Corruption aside, that’s awesome.

    1. What better place to hold your daily scrum?

  10. A politician resigning because he spent too much. When did that become a thing? Is it expected to continue?

    Rick Perry and his rental mansion. I vote he goes next.

    1. Whenever a politician gets exposed I always assume he pissed off a more powerful politician.

  11. 2 instances of “Republican” in that article. Over/Under of 0.5 if it was a team Blue

  12. You know who else enriched himself through holding political office…

    1. Your mom?

      1. You really suck at this game, Nutrasweet

        *shakes head in disappoint*

        1. Your mom sucks at this game.

          1. Wow, you really do suck. Just like your…see how it’s done?

            1. No, you really suck like your mom at this.

                1. THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID!

                  1. That’s what your mom said she said.

                2. Your mom sighed.

                  1. I know when I’m PWND – AND IT AIN’T NOW!

                    1. Your mom is pwnd.

      1. I was gonna go with either Scipio.

      2. Biggus Dickus?

        1. +1 something completely different.

    2. Your use of the singular “him” has me totally baffled.

  13. my neighbor’s mother makes $86 /hour on the internet . She has been fired from work for 8 months but last month her check was $12427 just working on the internet for a few hours. see it here…………..


  14. He redecorated his office to resemble Downton Abbey, brought a photographer with him everywhere he went, took staffers to a Katy Perry concert, and billed the American people for expensive hotels, airfare, and sporting events?raising the possibility of ethics and spending violations. National Review’s Charles C.W. Cooke has called him, plainly, “a crook.”

    I’m guessing had this been a Democrat, this would have been called “job creation” and “stimulus”.

    I’m always fascinated by what actually carries consequences in government. For instance, Hillary has not denied using an entirely unsecure email service to do the state’s most secret business. What are the possible consequences of that action?

    1. What are the possible consequences of that action?


      Dammit, missed a step – I mean:

      And nothing else happened.

      FYTW comes after.

    2. So much this.

      Ya, Schock definitely seems like he scammed the system a bit, but his scam seems pretty modest in comparison to the amount of graft and personal expenditures that many other pols and bureaucrats get away with.

      What Hillary did was something that actually threatens national security (and I’m not one to normally brandy about that strain of argument). Plus with her heavily foreign govt Clinton Foundation donor list, there is actually some reason to suspect or at the very least investigate if it wasn’t absent-minded mismanagement but actually fucking treason.

      Fucking Treason.

    3. If it was a Dem it would clearly have been a “cultural excursion”

  15. Hm.. I’m not sure that I should have to click through to politico or the NR article just to see what state Rep. Shock is from.

    Not that it matters much, I spose.

    1. IL – “Land of Lincoln Will the Defendant Please Rise”

  16. Didn’t he comment here before the shitstorm started?

    1. Really, what was his handle?

      1. I *think* under his own name.

        1. Hmm, smells troll-ey.

  17. And now I’m going to sound like a Democrat: I am almost – almost but not quite – in favor of allowing him to stay only for his votes. He’s pretty much against anything Boehner is for, which works for me. Boehner should be the one out on his ass, but Aaron has to learn Republicans don’t do exorbitant public spending on themselves (or if they do, they keep it the hell out of the papers instead of giving reporters guided tours of their Victorian-era offices while serving them champagne and caviar)

    1. “He’s pretty much against anything Boehner is for”

      Do you have any evidence for that? In his votes as opposed to his rhetoric, considering most in the GOP are statists who lie to conservatives (saying they are conservative) and then vote for more government?

      As evidence against your assertion, Shock voted to reauthorize the crony crapitalist corporate welfare of the Export Import Bank in 2012:
      Or this bill to extend unemployment compensation:

      From what I see, both Boehner and Shock are for more government.

  18. He was just doing the home-work needed to be a future governor of IL.

    1. Ya I was gonna say, for Illinois he’s a slacker…

  19. His big mistake was trying to get away with this as a Republican.


    1. If he’d been a D, the media would be sagely telling us the entire fauxgate was an attack on impoverished children.

      Of course, he might have had to claim gayness in public before the stain from his character was removed completely.

    2. No doubt as Democrat he would have received endless support and ultimately been moved up the ranks. Both parties need a really good house cleaning. One just has a lot more cleaning to do.

  20. my neighbor’s step-sister makes $82 /hr on the laptop . She has been fired from work for 9 months but last month her pay was $19160 just working on the laptop for a few hours. go
    ????? http://www.Jobs-Fashion.Com

  21. His statement contains no accountability and no contrition. Screw him.

  22. Another corrupt pol? Schocking!

  23. “It is an indictment of a person’s character, who wants to be a politician.” –MB Kitchen

  24. One down, 634 more to go, and that’s just in Congress.

  25. No speculation on the mechanism for his getting to quit?
    Let me tell you a story Robby.
    When a young reporter came back early from a celebrity wedding, his editor asked him why no story. The young man who earlier indicated that such a story was beneath his dignity said that the bride called it off. He was fired on the spot.
    If you don’t get the significance of that Robby, maybe you shouldn’t be a reporter either.

  26. The reason Shock resigned, was that Politico tracked down a vehicle for which Shock billed the government for 170,000 miles, yet it only had 80,000 on the odomoter. And of course he’s been spending other money for his office and staff – he was found out and immediately reimbursed the government.

    But based on his voting record (voting for the crony crapitalist Export Import bank in 2012), all the spending bills I’ve checked, to extend unemployment insurance, to support government spying on us, etc., I’m glad he’s gone.

    It’s been reported he was a prolific fundraiser, and got a seat on the Ways and Means Committee as a result. This is good evidence he’s willing to sell out citizens/taxpayers for campaign cash. His statement that “I have always sought to do what’s best for my constituents” is a crock, and really means he’s been for selling us out for the 1% who fund his campaigns and for himself. Good riddance.

  27. He reminds me of a libertarian type – you know, hip as in porn and pot and anything goes.



    The New Face of the GOP.

    1. He does have a bit of that Rand Paul smugness – check his face in the pic above. Looks like he knows everything like like Rand.

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