Uruguay's President Lectures Americans on Cigarettes and Becoming a Bilingual Country
Recently signed a bill into law that legalized and regulated marijuana


Marijuana was legalized earlier this year in Uruguay, where individuals are now permitted to grow up to six plants or buy 40 grams per month from the government. Uruguay's president, Jose Mujica, visited the White House today, deciding to lecture Americans.
Although he played a major role in getting the legislation passed in his country, he didn't talk about marijuana legalization. Instead he showed that the way the left approaches marijuana legalization often precludes greater freedom of choice in substance use and decisions about your body. Channeling his inner Bloomberg, Mujica went after cigarettes and cigarette companies. Via The Hill:
Mujica, a farmer and former guerrilla, said the world was in "an arduous fight" against "very strong [corporate] interests" who were promoting tobacco use.
"In the world, 8 million people are dying from smoking" each year, Mujica said, adding, "it's murder."
American tobacco company Phillip Morris is currently suing Uruguay for $2 billion at the World Bank's International Center for Settlement of Investment Disputes, arguing that a 2009 law requiring graphic health warnings on cigarette packs violates intellectual property rights.
Mujica reportedly wants President Obama to help with the lawsuit. The Uruguayan president then turned to immigration, avoiding policy specifics and instead addressing language. The Hill again:
"We live in a time when we need to learn English — yes, or yes?" he asked. "And you will have to become a bilingual country — yes, or yes? Because the strength of Latin women is admirable, and they will fill this country with people who speak Spanish and Portuguese, too."
Learning more languages is a plus for most people, and America is home to more than 400 languages, among the highest counts in the world. Americans will learn more languages when it benefits them, just as Mujica observed that Uruguayans and other non-English speakers have learned English for their benefit. It's a shame he can't extend that to marijuana and even cigarettes, and accept that people will buy and sell what they want to buy and sell more efficiently than government can mandate anything.
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Mujica, a farmer and former guerrilla
I feel like that's a reasonable segue to this: best play on the Che shirt ever?
Viva la siesta!
The honey badger doesn't give a shit, jesse.
It's a three-toed sloth you cretin.
The honey badger still doesn't give a shit, jesse.
I was at the LA Natural History Museum and they have a honey badger display. One of the girls with us said "OH SHIT! HONEY BADGERS ARE A REAL THING!?"
I think she lost serious points with her bf over it. Everyone else was entertained.
Yeah, but was she hot, jesse? That's all that matters. Not that I trust your judgement on the subject anyway. You're probably not as bad as nicole but you're close. Yeah, I said it.
Oh fuck off, I have great taste in women. When women and gay men everywhere were saying they'd go gay or straight respectively for Angelina Jolie, I was saying I'd flip for Wayne's World era Tia Carrere.
Also, the friend is not hot, but neither is her boyfriend, so they make a great pair.
I was saying I'd flip for Wayne's World era Tia Carrere
You're just digging the hole deeper, jesse.
You're just bitter because not even Wayne's World era Tia Carrere could turn you from your deviant Wartysexual lifestyle.
Its only cute till it pisses down on you, from its perch on a tree branch.
Fun fact: sloths actually climb down from the trees about once a week to piss and dook on the ground. Nobody knows why exactly.
Never micturate and defecate where you slothfully live?
Tell that to my pug.
I don't know why I laughed so hard at that, KK.
But I did.
And to purchase Activia.
Instead he showed that the way the left approaches marijuana legalization often precludes greater freedom of choice in substance use and decisions about your body.
Often? OFTEN?
Yeah, 'my body my choice' has flown so far out the window for the left, it ain't ever comin' back.
Phillip Morris is currently suing Uruguay for $2 billion ..., arguing that a 2009 law requiring graphic health warnings on cigarette packs violates intellectual property rights. Mujica reportedly wants President Obama to help with the lawsuit.
Well, why not? He's an ex-smoker and scholar, isn't he?
One wonders what kind of "help" he wants.
As President of a nation with relations with the US, he ought to at least have the vague idea that the President can't just "make them stop suing Uruguay".
(The idea that people smoke because They Just Have No Idea It's Bad For You And If Only They Did They'd Stop is untenable.
Why do the Health Cops insist it will work this time, for sure?)
Oh look, another self-congratulatory asshole politician telling other people what to do. What. A. Surprise.
It's nice to be multilingual, but why do the vast majority of Americans need to speak anything other than English?
To know when we are getting mocked - but that's about it.
"Hola, senores. Tengo trabajo. Cinquenta dolares para un dia de hango sidingo alumino."
There's gotta be better ways to score a threesome.
And they are never seen again....
Oh, and thanks! I have started
Uncle Warty's Squat Program for Great Strength and Might!
Make sure you eat a ton. Unless you're fat, in which case merely eat a lot.
I can do that!
Is that a desert country?
No. A fat country. Fat people.
You are not fat?
No. I'm different.
"Dear Warty, I don't squat as much as I'd like. How can I squat more?"
"By squatting more."
You must be in the program too!
Send Warty $65 and a self-addressed stamped envelope today. And you too can join the program and Squat Your Way to Success?!
You joke, but:
Ah, The 13th Warrior's best moment.
Thanks to Warty I have contracted bigorexia!
?Me pagar?n en efectivo?
If you manage or work with semi/low skilled labor, it helps to know some Espanol. Otherwise I can't think of a good reason.
Screw that. Violent gestures are all you need.
Or if you work at the New York Times...that way you can suck up to the boss better.
Da bitchez!
why do the vast majority of Americans need to speak anything other than English?
To assuage the guilty consciences of liberals who think that monolingualism is a national embarrassment?
Kinda like the lack of passports in American hands makes them sad pandas, since I guess they don't realize that the US is larger than Europe, and one can get plenty of travel in without gallivanting to another continent.
(I know Canadians who live half an hour from the border who don't have passports - despite having American friends.
Somehow this is not painted as a national shame for Canuckistan.)
Why does Montgomery Scott feel like he needs to lecture us on smoking and speaking Spanish?
How else do you expect him to retain his reputation as a miracle worker?
I was thinking Buddy Hackett
Well, Captain, er...the Klingons called you a...a tin-plated, overbearing, swaggering dictator with delusions of godhood.
Sounds about right for this politician.
Extending this metaphor even further, I guess we shouldn't call Uruguay a garbage scow.
Unless the second language is Esperanto, not interested.
Neniel!
WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL ME?
Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Are you shook up? Are you nervous?
Private Cowboy: Sir, I am, sir.
Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Do I make you nervous?
Private Cowboy: Sir?
Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: "Sir" what? Were you about to call me an asshole?
Looks like Esperanto for 'Ninny'.
"Slippery Jim" DiGriz agrees.
+1 Stainless Steel Rat
Lots of Esperanto in the Deathworld books, too.
Harrison loved him some Esparanto, he did.
"Because the strength of Latin women is admirable, and they will fill this country with people who speak Spanish and Portuguese, too."
Gee, thanks for lighting the 'murican signal, Mr. President...
Anchor babies!
All these second-rate, leftist countries run by former criminals and tinpot dictators that lecture America make me laugh my ass off.
Like they should talk.
I will say this though. For a tiny country of three million, they sure produce decent soccer players and have a nice heritage in that sport.
Uruguay is actually pretty free-market, for Latin America.
Less volatile too. I know. I was talking more in general. U-r-gay got swept in.
Faint praise indeed.
Uruguay is "free market" insofar as the rule of law can be conveniently ignored if you merely grease the right palms.
Does corruption exist in the US? Absolutely, but not anywhere near approaching the levels seen everywhere else. Americans who haven't traveled really don't know how fucking awesome this country still is, despite its myriad (and ever increasing) problems.
Which is pretty damned depressing, that despite the over regulated police state we are becoming we are still a shining bastion of freedom. The people here who think they are going to "free state" in South/Central America are, well, morons.
KKKorporations. Why did it have to be KKkorporations?
Uruguay, NTTAWWT.
President Scotty?
Sounds like he needs to learn English better or use his translator. Yes or yes?
I'm making you an offer you can't refuse.