Brickbat: Big Meth-take


Two years ago, Paul Valin found a backpack while kayaking the Des Moines River. He threw it in the back of his truck, intending to try to find its owner. But when he got home and opened it, he found what he thought was a kit for making meth.  He called the Des Moines police department, who sent an officer to pick it up, and that was the last Valin thought of it. Then in January of this year, a reporter knocked on Valin's door and asked him if he knew his house was on a federal list of sited where meth labs had been found. He did not, and his repeated calls to local police to get his house off that list went unanswered. Only after IowaWatchdog.org got involved did the feds agree to remove Valin's home from the list.

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  1. He did not, and his repeated calls to local police to get his house off that list went answered.

    They went answered? Really?

    1. Obamacare allowed the old proofreaders to stop working and learn to paint or something.

    2. Sometimes God’s answer is no.

  2. Perfectly valid, how do the Feds know he “found” that backpack, and simply didn’t turn in his own backpack, from his own meth lab in his basement? It is this sort of vigilance that has made the WoD so blindingly successful in the first place.

  3. But when he got home and opened it, he found what he thought was a kit formaking meth.

    That he had any.idea at all what might.be.used to make meth is.proof of.his.guilt. Good shoot, hth.

  4. Yeah, l bet this is some kind of devious plan the likes of which we would have seen on Breaking Bad. Now that he has his house off their list and no longer under federal surveillance I expect his plan will hatch soon.

    /WOD warrior prog

  5. So the correct answer is: Don’t report evidence of victimless crimes and re-dispose of it.

    1. If you see something, don’t say anything!

  6. something something no good deed something something.

  7. Two lessons that seem to require constant reinforcement:

    1) Do NOT go to the police
    2) Throw the “evidence” in the garbage of a person/business you do not like
    3) Perhaps, going back to the beginning, open the fucking bag when you FIND it – and, seeing that’s it’s clearly not camping gear, leave it for a Methhead lost in the woods. Think of it as Emergency Meth Kit for lost souls.

    But for FUCK’S SAKE don’t call the cops and have them pick it up at YOUR residence!

    Thus endeth the abject lesson.

    1. Um, upon re-reading this, I see that I need to note that “three is the new two”


      1. NOBODY expects the Spanish Inquisition! Our chief weapon is surprise…surprise and fear…fear and surprise…. Our two weapons are fear and surprise…and ruthless efficiency…. Our *three* weapons are fear, surprise, and ruthless efficiency…and an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope…. Our *four*…no… *Amongst* our weapons…. Amongst our weaponry…are such elements as fear, surprise…. I’ll come in again.

  8. FTFA: The [National Clandestine Laboratory Register] “contains addresses of some locations where law enforcement agencies reported they found chemicals or other items that indicated the presence of either clandestine drug laboratories or dumpsites.”

    So, technically, Valin’s house *could* belong on that list.

    There *is* that wiggly “some locations” thing, though.

  9. Could have been worse. He should be writing a thank you letter that the officer didn’t arrest him.


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