Nanny State

From the Angry Makers of Forbidden Buckyballs: Liberty Balls!

It takes balls to fight against government regulatory authority


You can rub them in public without shame!
Assemble LLC

Buckyballs, the powerful little toy magnets that weren't meant for small children, was forced out of business by the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission (CPSC) over a handful of injuries (despite copious warnings on the packaging).  Furthermore, its CEO, Craig Zucker, is being targeted to be personally liable for a potential recall, which could cost more than $50 million.

The company has dissolved and the Buckyballs are no longer on the market (though competitors apparently are!). The legal problems haven't gone away, though, so Zucker and supporters have started a new company selling new bigger magnetic balls, called Liberty Balls, and promise that 100 percent of the proceeds will be used to fight against the CPSC's assault on Zucker.

You can visit their clever (and chock-full of Reason-approved sarcasm) site here and purchase from their very first batch of Liberty Balls and make as many barely veiled references about testicles as you like.

Below, Kennedy and Reason TV interviewed Zucker last year about his fight against government nannies:


(Hat tip to Walter Olson at the Cato Institute.)

NEXT: School Anti-Bullying Programs May Have Opposite Effect

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  1. Was about to order…

    Ferrite? Are they the same as the old big balls? Wonder if he wimped out a little on it.

    1. i believe those are ceramic ones and not the rare earth metal ones. I could be mistaken. Though rare earth ones that large are really dangerous and ridiculously hard to pull a part and are likely to explode on contact. Plus would cost an insane amount for a decent quality one….though i am no expert so i could be wrong. Just what i remember from googling around and reading from a month or so ago.

      1. Yea, I don’t remember much either. Co-worker has some of the large buckyballs. They’re fun and neat, but not as strong as the small ones.

        I’d like something in between “no way the CSPC can bitch about this” and “will destroy your hand sooner or later”.

        May still get them just for the FU to the nanny-state.

        1. Get like a N50 one O.o cost 50-100 for something that big per ball but it’ll have some insane force…i kid of course ^^

      2. Take apart a harddrive some time and play with those fuckers. They’ll take your finger right off if they clap together. They might even shatter from the impact.

        Measuring about 2″x0.5″x0.25″. I use them to hang stuff from false ceilings and the metal flashing in the corners of walls.

  2. Good for Zucker. We need more people to stand up to the petty tyrannies of the Nanny State.

  3. Shame? For rubbing your balls in public?


  4. So we got your standard black, gold and nickel?

    How in the fuck can there be no brass?

    1. Not everyone has the brass balls to sell real estate.

      1. You got leads. Gillespie and Welch paid good money. Get their names to sell them! You can’t close the leads you’re given, you can’t close shit, you are shit, hit the bricks, pal, and beat it ’cause you’re going out!

        1. The leads are weak? The fuckin’ leads are weak? YOU’RE weak!

          1. FUCK YOU, that’s my name! You know why, Mister? ‘Cause you drove a Hyundai to get here tonight, I drove an 80,000 dollar BMW. That’s my name!

            1. I made $970,000 last year. How much you make? You see pal, that’s who I am, and you’re nothing. Nice guy? I don’t give a shit. Good father? Fuck you! Go home and play with your kids. You wanna work here – close!

              You think this is abuse? You think this is abuse, you cocksucker? You can’t take this, how can you take the abuse you get on a sit? You don’t like it, leave.

              1. well i’ll be the person that drives a corolla for ~.35 cents a mile or less and keep the extra money for something a lot more fun.

              2. I think we’re gonna need a bigger boat.

      2. Brass contains lead. So yeah, moving from one potential threat to another, more innocuous threat.

      3. Put that coffee down! … Coffee’s for closers only.

        You think I’m fucking with you? …… I am not fucking with you.

    2. More importantly, what caliber are they?

      1. 2 gauge?1.3″

        Awesome video linked from there

  5. Warning: Pregnant women, the elderly, and children under 10 should avoid prolonged exposure to Happy Fun Ball.
    Caution: Happy Fun Ball may suddenly accelerate to dangerous speeds.
    Happy Fun Ball contains a liquid core, which, if exposed due to rupture, should not be touched, inhaled, or looked at.
    Do not use Happy Fun Ball on concrete.
    Discontinue use of Happy Fun Ball if any of the following occurs: itching
    tingling in extremities
    loss of balance or coordination
    slurred speech
    temporary blindness
    profuse sweating
    heart palpitations

    If Happy Fun Ball begins to smoke, get away immediately. Seek shelter and cover head.
    Happy Fun Ball may stick to certain types of skin.
    When not in use, Happy Fun Ball should be returned to its special container and kept under refrigeration. Failure to do so relieves the makers of Happy Fun Ball, Wacky Products Incorporated, and its parent company, Global Chemical Unlimited, of any and all liability.
    Ingredients of Happy Fun Ball include an unknown glowing substance which fell to Earth, presumably from outer space.
    Happy Fun Ball has been shipped to our troops in Saudi Arabia and is also being dropped by our warplanes on Iraq.
    Do not taunt Happy Fun Ball.
    Happy Fun Ball comes with a lifetime guarantee.

    1. You forgot:

      Not for consumption, please do not eat Happy Fun Ball or feed to your children.

      Under no circumstances, give Happy Fun Ball to Warty.

    2. Happy Fun Ball contains a liquid core, which, if exposed due to rupture, should not be touched, inhaled, or looked at will begin a matter/antimatter reaction that may breach the hull.

  6. OT, my typical modus operandi, I suppose.

    New NSA Spy SuperCenter going up in flames

    Burn, baby, burn! When you first read that headline, you have to hope for the best possible scenario, that it burned down, imploded, disappeared into a blackhole, and took half of the government with it.

    1. Stuxnet: The Revenge

      Better run Malwarebytes.

      1. That seems…plausible, actually.

        1. The Gizmodo article said it was because most of their power systems were un- or under- tested and the power requirements for the facility were equal to a town of 20k people.

          Not that I’d be surprised if it were cyber warfare, but I find their incompetence a tastier treat.

      2. I smell slush-funds REDACTED..

    2. See, having spent some time in IT (a lot). Mostly software, but a sizable amount in datacenters that had power problems…

      Obamacare exchange doesn’t work? No excuse, they had 3 years. The numbers they’re trying to hit aren’t huge on a big data scale. There’s plenty of people that could put that together. A waiting line for a legit, not warez downloading site, on day one? seriously? No excuse.

      NSA data center catches on fire because the power systems don’t work like they should? That’s damn near every datacenter.

      They probably could have got people who had build DCs of that size, but wouldn’t, ’cause they’d rather do it themselves, have less people know about it, etc.

    3. *I* was hoping someone had had the balls to set the place on fire.

  7. …and promise that 100 percent of the proceeds will be used to fight against the CPSC’s assault on Zucker.

    Oh no! That means the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission is going to have to find a way to match those funds in its action against Zucker. Where will they get the money?

    1. Don’t worry we (read, the taxpayers) have it covered. What we don’t have covered, the all new printing hag czar, can make appear as if by magic. Then she’ll fly to the whitehouse, on her broom, and meet with comrade numero uno.

  8. Are they made by third world peasant children?

    1. If not, libertarians should boycott the company.

  9. Heroic. I will have to get some to throw some money his way.

  10. We await CRSC’s declaration of a War On Windmills, which should proceed at full tilt because the neodymium supermagnets in such alternative energy systems are as swallowable as those deployed in desk toys.

  11. How about a war on fat?
    “Should schools send home ‘fat’ letters?”
    Photo in link; the kid ain’t fat, regardless of the slimy nannie tactics.…..t-letters/

    1. “Your child’s BMI is slightly over the 89th percentile.”

      Noted. What’s *yours*, letter-sender?

      1. Dear Comrade Libertarian Kulak,

        Today your male or female state-approved child was registered as having a BMI above the state-approved limit for a child of such age. Please take corrective measures, or we will be required by law to deploy the social workers to your state-approved residence.

        Your Cooperation Is Appreciated,

        State-Certified Matriculation Bureaucrat

        1. If that’s not an impetus to home-school the kid, the parents are government suck-asses.
          I sure hope the kid tells ’em to take a hike.

        2. Dear Comrade Matriculation Bureaucrat

          As soon as Buckyballs return to the marketplace, the offending offspring will be placed on a strict diet of supermagnets and water in hope the resulting intestinal perforations will take a bite out of juvenile Fatcrime.

          Yours Fraternally

    2. Obamacare will take care of the fat kid issue.

      When they access all of your bank transactions and see too much of the wrong type of food you have being purchased, combined with the fact that you have children who are over the state approved body fat index, they will be forced to intervene, in the name of public health, and for the children.

      That will mean sending in the swat team at 3am to save the children.

      The disturbing thing here is that I’m not joking. This is where we are headed at full speed ahead. This is what the progressives mean when they say moving forward.

      1. Ah, you also understand what they mean by “Lean Forward”.

    3. But her body mass index (BMI) is 22, which places her slightly above the 89th percentile and classifies her as overweight.

      Umm, BMI is a terrible metric, but 22 is DEAD CENTER OF NORMAL. Also BMI is a doubly terrible metric when dealing with anyone who hasn’t finished puberty.

  12. I’d like to see Kennedy in a buckyballs bikini.

    Yeah, baby –

    1. Haha – wrong fucking article! Fuck me!

      1. It’s the right thread, dude. You been drankin again?

  13. OT:

    Shelia Jackson Lee (D-Fantasy Island) has decided it’s time for martial law.

    She really is just awesome to watch. It’s like a sitcom or something.

    Here’s the Idear”

    1. “we have martial law”

      Not being intimately familiar with parliamentary terms, what could she have been going for?

      1. I hate to defend Lee, but apparently “martial law” is used in the House to mean suspending the rule that members must have at least one day to read bills before voting.

    2. Everything except the last part (*MINUTIAE & PRONUNCIATION ALERT*: “idear”) was correct, though. Why stall everything over the parts you disagree on when you can at least get the parts you DO agree on up and running again?

      1. Not true though, she repeated the line someone told her about a “clean” CR resolution which is the dumbest description of legislation possibly put to print.

        Not that Lee understands this, but that’s not my point. The media fascination with the term “clean” CR is similar to the term “white hispanic”, in that they both mean nothing.

        1. …”the term “clean” CR is similar to the term “white hispanic”, in that they both mean nothing.”

          “Clean” was invented over the last week, and it does have a meaning. It means “a bill which gives Obama everything he wants”.
          But those using the word would rather that be kept behind the curtains.

    3. “Mars is wild, untamed. I’m forming a cadre of Martian knights charged with enforcing Martian law.”

      1. RACIST!

        So here’s a drunk white guy that was on my youtube sidebar for some reason.

      2. DAYAM!

        What an intelligent woman. I can see why congress is her calling.

  14. I know this isn’t a popular opinion around here, but I’m unimpressed by the makers of Liberty Balls’ repeated appeals to limited liability.

    Contrary to popular opinion here, I don’t believe government-mandated limited liability to be compatible with voluntarism (the fact that limited-liability arrangements COULD arise voluntarily is irrelevant).

    Furthermore, they don’t NEED to appeal to limited liability. The issue is nothing more or less than out-of-control regulator agencies (as usual).

    1. regulatory*

  15. This is rediculous! Good luck to Zucker in his fight.

  16. Buckyballs Magnetic Balls not only Magnetic Toys but also Puzzle Decompression Toys. Buy now free shipping.

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