Friday Funnies: Baggage for the Fiat-Chrysler Merger

Henry Payne | 9.27.2013 7:00 AM

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invisible furry hand 12 years ago

Payne's subliminal phalli are getting out of hand
1. Rich 12 years ago
  
  But, ifh, it's a subliminal hand.
  
  Also, subliminal phalli -- nice band name.
2. Snark Plissken 12 years ago
  
  Seriously, what is that 'baggage' at the top supposed to be? An errant mummy sleeping bag?
  1. Rich 12 years ago
    
    A body rolled up in a carpet.
    1. Almanian! 12 years ago
      
      -1 Hoffa
    2. Snark Plissken 12 years ago
      
      "Sometimes a carpet is just a dick."
      1. Rich 12 years ago
        
        Give that man a cigar!
Fist of Etiquette 12 years ago

Why is that fat guy sticking his dick out the window?
1. Sy 12 years ago
  
  I thought the dick was the fat guy
  1. Fist of Etiquette 12 years ago
    
    Or, and wait to hear me out on this one, is the fat guy's dick driving, and the other thing his hernia?
    1. Sy 12 years ago
      
      I think that's just half of a crushed testicle.
    2. WTF 12 years ago
      
      I thought IFH was referring to the giant brown dick on top of the luggage.
      1. BlueBook 12 years ago
        
        I thought he was referring to the fire hydrant.
      2. Fist of Etiquette 12 years ago
        
        That's Seamus the dog's corpse on top of the luggage.
2. Lady Bertrum 12 years ago
  
  The hydrant represents?
3. Wizard4169 12 years ago
  
  Maybe he just couldn't wait for a rest stop.
Longtorso, Johnny 12 years ago

I sat in a lime green and tan Fiat 500 at the Houston Auto Show and immediately became homosexual. True story.
1. np 12 years ago
  
  I lol'd. You should take over for Payne and Bok.
  1. Swiss Servator, Bow to Bern 12 years ago
    
    True, he is funnier...
UnCivilServant 12 years ago

I don't get it. That's just what you get when you put anyone in a fiat.
BlueBook 12 years ago

I was led to believe every Fiat came with a sey Italian chick. Was I misinformed?
1. invisible furry hand 12 years ago
  
  that is Payne's attempt at drawing a sexy Italian chick
  1. WTF 12 years ago
    
    Payne thought they said sexy Italian dick.
  2. Snark Plissken 12 years ago
    
    He's so bad that he left off the mustache.
    1. Longtorso, Johnny 12 years ago
      
      That wasn't a mustache.
      1. Almanian! 12 years ago
        
        I did not know that "Grumpy" Jenkins was back from the dead and drag racing Fiats now. Wonder what class they're in?
        
        Also, unusual to take a mechanic (or two) along. Maybe he's an instructor at Roy Hill's Drag Racing School and his passengers are students? And I guess Hill switched from Ford to Fiat for his school? Weird.
        
        So confusing as always.
2. BlueBook 12 years ago
  
  Correction: the sexy chick in question is Romanian, not Italian. (Catrinel Menghia, if you're interested.)
  1. Longtorso, Johnny 12 years ago
    
    Fiat Ad girls
    1. Snark Plissken 12 years ago
      
      We used to have RAI on the cable. Amazing the amount of hot Eastern European blondes that have jobs just standing around in skimpy outfits looking hot they have on their cheesy game shows.
Mike M. 12 years ago

Why are the Beverly Hillbillies popping a wheelie inside a Matchbox car?
1. Almanian! 12 years ago
  
  That's Grumpy Jenkins and passengers at the Roy Hill Drag Racing School, apparently.
  
  See my misplaced essay, above.
2. Snark Plissken 12 years ago
  
  "Jethro, in the box under 'sex' you aren't supposed to write, "Oh boy!"
3. Neoliberal Kochtopus 12 years ago
  
  Wait, is the driver Granny or Mr. Drysdale?
Swiss Servator, Bow to Bern 12 years ago

It know its not Bok, however... NEEDZ MOAR LABELZ!
Lady Bertrum 12 years ago

The fat UAW guy is giving the Italians annual.
1. Doctor Whom 12 years ago
  
  Kinda like what the UAW has so often done.
The Late P Brooks 12 years ago

Needs more labels.
sarcasmic 12 years ago

I don't get it.
1. Lady Bertrum 12 years ago
  
  Not even annually?
  1. sarcasmic 12 years ago
    
    I'm married.
  2. Neoliberal Kochtopus 12 years ago
    
    His women keep slipping through the gap in between the headboard and the bed. Tragic.
    1. sarcasmic 12 years ago
      
      Women? I don't think so. I've been monogamous for the last ten years.
    2. Lady Bertrum 12 years ago
      
      By "slipping" you mean escaping. Right? If she had a few extra pounds she'd be easier to catch.
    3. John Galt 12 years ago
      
      His women are pillows?
      1. Neoliberal Kochtopus 12 years ago
        
        They're not that robust.
        
        John Galt 12 years ago
        
        Maybe he needs one of those big long oversize pillows like my wife used to use to pretend it was another man.
2. John Galt 12 years ago
  
  I like it.
John Galt 12 years ago

Big union goon busting the suspension. Too much baggage to handle, the little car is doomed to suffer catastrophic failure.
1. Redmanfms 12 years ago
  
  Too much baggage to handle, the little car is doomed to suffer catastrophic failure.
  
  To be fair, it's Italian, so catastrophic failure is guaranteed.
  
  I believe every Italian car made has that mentioned somewhere in its manual. Something like, "Will inexplicably take a giant shit and be completely unrepairable within 6 months of warranty expiration."
  1. Wizard4169 12 years ago
    
    Nah, more like chronic failure. If it underwent truly catastrophic failure, you'd just junk it. Instead, it keeps throwing up problems that are insanely difficult (but just possible) to repair, thus keeping hope alive and keeping you spending money.
    
    "Fix It Again, Tony!"
John Galt 12 years ago

To be fair, it's Italian, so catastrophic failure is guaranteed.

True, but by adding the UAW to to mix is like purchasing high quality insurance on the guarantee.
Entropy Void 12 years ago

My first car was a Fiat X1/9.
Couldn't get that lawnmower engine to go over 90 mph.
But with that mid engine design, I could snap a 90 degree turn @ 45 mph.
It was anemic but fun with the top off at the beach ...

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Friday Funnies: Baggage for the Fiat-Chrysler Merger

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