IRS Needs Those Nonprofit Taxes; How Else Can They Pay for Booze and Porn?

Oh, Internal Revenue Service. Are you afraid people will forget you amid all the other scandals and chasing after Edward Snowden and Paul Deen's racism and what have you? Is this another cry for attention? According to an inspector general's report, IRS employees are using their company credit cards for all sorts of inappropriate stuff. Via the Associated Press:

Poor oversight by the Internal Revenue Service allowed workers to use agency credit cards to buy wine for an expensive luncheon, dorky swag for managers' meetings and, for one employee, romance novels and diet pills, an agency watchdog said Tuesday.

Two IRS credit cards were used to buy online pornography, though the employees said the cards were stolen. One of the workers reported five agency credit cards lost or stolen.

Other questionable purchases included popcorn machines and more than $100 worth of Nerf footballs that were never even used. Sure, this is all small potatoes given the total budget of the IRS, but you just try to write stuff like this off as business expenses and see what happens.

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Comments

[Marginal]

Free Shackford, the Mumia Abu-Jamal of the 3rd Millennium!

[Rich]

more than $100 worth of Nerf footballs that were never even used.

Are you sure they weren't used as alien spaceships in the IRS "Star Trek" training video?

[Hyperion]

Paul's a girl. Just sayin.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Paul is dead.

[Sevo]

Satire is dead.

[Warrren]

Sartre?

[Sevo]

Him, too. And good riddance,

[Nikkis enthusiastic dissent]

Other questionable purchases included popcorn machines

And here I always thought Reno 911 was a cop parody show.

[Tonio]

The most effective parodies are indistinguishable from the real thing.

[mad libertarian guy]

Sure, this is all small potatoes given the total budget of the IRS, but you just try to write stuff like this off as business expenses and see what happens.

Only the dumbest of business owners would even try because we know well that an "Oh . . . my bad!" just isn't going to cut it being that were peons and all.

[Irish]

Wait, they're using this money for booze and porn? I thought they were using it for something immoral, like sending their kids to college.

Man, if they're spending this money on good American products like pornography and low grade moonshine, then they can have all the money they want.

[cavalier973]

It's funny because it's true.

[A Serious Man]

Since I was forced by police to work from home today, can I write off my cable bill?

Only if you admit to watching porn Scott.

[Agammamon]

I still don't get the uneven prohibition on alcohol purchases with government credit cards.

1. Religious personnel can still buy alcohol (as needed for religious services) - Though I imagine that, except for the senate priest, this exemption only affects the military.

2. If alcohol can be prohibited what other stuff can be? How long before you can't order food that contains meat? What about requiring that all ingredients for meals purchased with the cards come from domestic producers within 100 miles of your current location?

[Sevo]

"2. If alcohol can be prohibited what other stuff can be? How long before you can't order food that contains meat? What about requiring that all ingredients for meals purchased with the cards come from domestic producers within 100 miles of your current location?"

Uh, how about keeping that sort of stuff to yourself? I mean, these guys aren't real bright; there's no reason to help 'em out.

[Agammamon]

Its too late anyway - the NSA planted a mind-reading chip in my brain back when I enlisted for the second time.

The best I can do is put this stuff out there so the rest of you can take warning and prepare for the next onslaught.

[Apatheist ?_??]

Help them out. Any restrictions on IRS employees is perfectly fine with me.

[PapayaSF]

I would LOVE IT if taxpayer-paid meals were required to be vegetarian. Not because I am one (far from it), but because it would result in lower costs and really piss off a bunch of government employees.

[Agammamon]

How would it result in lower costs? You'd have to find some hippy-dippy "artisanal" vegetarian restaurant with jacked-up prices.

[Sevo]

"but because it would result in lower costs and really piss off a bunch of government employees."

Not sure. Google "Greens Restaurant"; expensive rabbit food.

[PapayaSF]

Good point. That remains the only vegetarian restaurant I'll happily eat at.

[Sevo]

Long ago, in the 'salad locker' where I spent my KP duty, we would get instructions on what we were serving that day (wedge of lettuce with dressing, two tomato slices, etc), always accompanied by the admonition: "Big smile, little ration". I presumed there was a rake-off, and the suspicion was reinforced toward the end of the month when the tomatoes, cucumbers, avocados and all that went away.
What are we serving today? "Grass". With dressing.

[UnCivilServant]

I wish I got taxpayer paid meals 🙁 . Until the change in administration, I couldn't even accept vendor paid meals, and those cost the taxpayer nothing (Because the vendors don't realize I don't make purchasing decisions). Now it's back to what the law actually reads.

As for the veggie requirement proposal, the salad salad sandwiches weren't bad. I wouldn't buy them myself, but if you guys are picking up the tab...

[Sevo]

On topic:
"House panel challenges IRS worker who took Fifth"
"A House committee is planning to challenge whether an Internal Revenue Service supervisor properly invoked her constitutional right against self-incrimination"...
http://www.sfgate.com/news/art.....621737.php
Or your fave AP reseller

[Brian]

It's so fitting to see administrators at the IRS act like mobsters.

[Warrren]

Pornotax!

[UnCivilServant]

Noooooooooooooooo!!!!!!! Don't tax that.

Or is that a tax paid in pron?

[Warrren]

You almost spelled semen.